Sometimes one action can give a complete impression of a person, and it can't be unseen afterward.
Friendships crash and burn for the same reason they thrive: the relationship is based on the ability to completely let your guard down.
That transparency is a coin with two very different sides.
One is wonderful for its openness and desire to collaborate. Struggles are shared, advice is trusted, and the ability to be one's true self is cherished.
The other side is the kind of trust with a shadow. Simply put, the relationship is taken for granted. Little work is offered because things became too comfortable somewhere along the line.
In those conditions, an ugly corner of character will rear its head one day. And then it's all over with
Yeetus_the_freakus asked, "What was your 'We're done' moment with a friend?"
A Self-Serving Ethos
"She got mad when I was faithful to my girlfriend and turned her down, so she tried to torpedo my relationship." -- Liamiller
"When he was jealous of my relationship with a girl that he liked and tried to make himself look better by trying to make me look bad." -- Denster1
"Apparently when someone gets into a relationship it makes them THAT much more attractive to someone else or they just don't like seeing their 'Lessers' happy." -- Spiced-Apples
Not a Good Look
"He threw a house party. He then convinced everybody to play drinking games and get extremely drunk. He even convinced the dedicated drivers (one of whom was me) to also get drunk by saying everyone can crash at his place so no one needs to drive home and everyone can get drunk."
"He later threw a tantrum because everyone was drunk and he didn't want his house full of drunk people. He then threw everybody out in the middle of the night and just shut the door. He did this twice within one year."
-- _monicorpse
"But Should Old Acquaintances Be Forgot"
"When she complained that I was ruining her new years' eve after a drunk guy assaulted me and hit me with a bar stool and I wanted to go home." -- ElectronicFerret
"Ah yes, how dare you wish to seek medical attention for possible serious injury. So selfish of you. Like seriously, in what world does this dumb piece of sh*t think that's decent logic? She must have been absolutely tanked but that doesn't make it any less stupid and wrong." -- VTark
How Unaware in Your House?...
"Used my house as a middle point so he could come into town and f*** around on his wife (also a friend of mine). When it all blew up he was unaware I knew what was going on and he fed me a bunch of sh*t that wasn't true in attempts to convince me he was somehow the victim."
"So that was that."
-- Happy8Day
The Priorities Come Out
"My grandmother had just passed away, and I was really upset about it. She told me that people die, 'that's how life works,' then proceeded to complain to me for 15 minutes about how upset she was that her mom stole $20 from her to get some weed." -- VaticanCameos714
"Ah the default idgaf answer." -- BobMarleyTot
A Poor Pupper Catalyzed the Break
"When he decided an out-of-town party was more important than staying home with his dog that was dying." -- notasleannotasmean
"Dogs > People 100 times out of 100." -- w0ke_brrr_4444
Rough Place to Patch Things Up. Rougher Place to Screw Things Up.
"When I found out he f*cked my wife in the Pizza Hut bathroom. This was nearly 30 years ago and I never spoke to him since, until the other day I was at a convenience store and he walked in and tried to make conversation like we were long lost buddies."
"I never gray rocked anyone so hard."
A Tough Ask
"She was having an affair with a married coworker at my company and asked if I'd spy on him at work for her."
"I was not about to jeopardize my career to facilitate her banging someone else's husband."
-- coo_coo_mf
Never Looked Back
"He and and another friend complained about a $3 cover charge, insulted the band, insulted the waitress and brought her to tears."
"I stood up, threw enough cash on the table to cover the tab and the cover charge and walked out of the pub."
"Never spoke to them again. That was 16 years ago."
-- shavemejesus
Impatience for Cheap Shots
"When she made fun of my husband to his face. It was when he and I first started dating and she just straight up said: 'What the f*** is wrong with your nose?' "
"For the record there is nothing wrong with his nose, its just a curved nose like idk, Vincent Cassel's. It was pretty rich coming from her. Regardless I stopped talking to her at all after that, total b***h move."
-- YouJabroni44
One-Sided Effort
"We were friends for 8 years, neighbors for 3. After we both moved we wound up in different countries for a while, still talked weekly. Then I wound up five hours away from her, I would drive to see her at least every three-four months on my way to take my daughter to her dads even though she was an hour out of my way."
"Loaned her money to keep her water on (never saw the money again, also never asked for it cause if I didn't have it to lose I wouldn't have given it in the first place) paid for everything when we went out."
"She gets a new boyfriend and they drive to my city for a vacation. Tells me she's there. She's 2 miles away in a hotel. I invite her over she says no because boyfriend doesn't want to, I offer to meet her for lunch at the mall she says can't because she missed the shuttle and the 10 min 2 block walk to the mall is too far."
"I just finally said screw it told her she was a crappy friend and haven't spoken to her since. It sucks, I miss her but I have better friends that deserve my attention and time."
-- spiffydrew
Regrettable Investments
"It took about 18 months to two years, but I gave a bunch of money to a 'friend' to buy a beater car for my sibling ($700-$800). I didn't push; work and life gets in the way, but after about a month, I asked what was going on. Apparently there'd been two decent cars on the hook, but they fell through, and now I/we needed to wait. I was cool with that."
"The excuses kept coming, and, at around the 12 month mark, I was asked to do some house/puppy sitting for them. I checked the small tin that had been conspicuously on the TV unit for the past year (I wanted a pizza and was a day before pay), full of money for my sib's car. Yup; empty."
"Okay. Righto. I let it lay for a week or so, then told them that hooray, they didn't need to shill for my sib any longer, as their work was going to enter a lease agreement for a vehicle (absolute f***ing lie). So, if they could just drop the cash back off, that'd be the end of that."
"Cue the next six months of whinging and whining, until I decided it just wasn't worth it; and if they'd been willing to lie to my face for over a year, they're not a friend."
-- Nemisis1509
A Slew of Horrible Discoveries
"Damn. I'd say when I realized she was a total sociopath. At first I thought she just had a rough upbringing. But she lied about half the things she accused her parents of.
"Started hitting her boyfriend and blaming it on her multiple personality disorder (something she made up about a year after we became friends). Tried to kick my dog."
"Told me about how she put a hamster in the microwave to watch it blow up. Started to set fires in our neighborhood (never got out of control luckily). And started spreading rumors about me."
The Last Straw
"Anytime we'd hang out, she would do/say some stupid shit that would make me look at her sideways. Then, one day she said something to me so rude, under the guise of being funny and then I snapped on her. That was the last interaction between us years ago."
"Everyone kept pleading for me to reach out and mend things, but I didn't do anything wrong, so."
-- khaila_
Financially Motivated
"Tried for years to keep the friendship going with zero effort from her. Finally had some progress when she got pregnant but quickly realized she only wanted gifts from me."
"I didn't try at all after that, she sent me a happy birthday message along with an invitation to some MLM party she was having, blocked her."
-- unkind-raven
An Ethical Impasse
"She decided to kill her current horse instead of trying to sell him or give him away. She thought he was dangerous, when really she was just a wuss and he didn't want to jump. She had a new horse coming and needed the stall."
"Done. I can't be friends with a person who treats animals as disposable. Especially horses, a herd animal that trusts is enough to let us strap a saddle onto them and ride them around. Don't be a sh** human."
-- Holybull79
A Hasty Approach to Posting
"My friend posted on Facebook about us going to the pride parade together. I asked him to remove my name or take down the post because I wasn't out to many people yet and we have a lot of the same friends. He flat out refused. What a d***!"
-- vizzie1
Just a Bad House Guest
"I gave him a ride to brunch. He proceeded to get so drunk that he got all of us kicked out for making repeated lewd sexual comments at the waitress after being warned about it, then he threw up all over the side of my car and said he's pay for washing it, but couldn't come up with 10 bucks when we got to a car wash."
-- ElToberino
Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "
When we're young and naive, we tend to be optimistic as we have our whole lives ahead of us and we have to time to figure out who we are and who we want to be.
But when we're all grown up and out in the big world on our own, nothing can prepare us for the harsh realities of adulting until we experience them.
And unfortunately, life isn't always sunshine and roses the way we imagined it to be when we were much more innocent.
Curious to hear about life's many wake up calls Redditor Just_Surround_2108 asked:
"What is the adult version of finding out that Santa Claus doesn't exist?"
Life's deceptions begin slowly revealing themselves.
Caveat Emptor
"When you buy an 8-piece tupperware set, 4 of the pieces are lids."
– throwmeawaypoopy
"Same with pots and pans. What a rip off!"
– MrsMalvora
"And when you put them in the cabinet, suddenly SIX of the pieces are lids 😂"
– opheliainwaders
Value Of Friendships
"That some friends were never really your friend."
– Kangaroowrangler_02
"Also that friendships can end just like any relationship."
– ScienceUnicorn
"The best friend I'll ever have said some nasty things to me and blocked me recently. Never going to get much closure on that front."
"Not having closure is, with both friends and lovers, worse than the loss itself. I want to grow. Tell me what I need to become so this doesn't happen to me again!"
– VoxClarus
"On a related note: your co-workers are not your friends."
– tomdelfino
"I think most people seem to treat this as the default stance, but I’ve learnt you can actually make deep connections amongst coworkers, the same way you do in other stages of your life."
– immorjoe
The role of parent and child unexpectedly switches. So now what?
Who's Parenting Who
"That time period when your relationship switches and your parent looks to you for answers and advice, instead them being the one with all the answers."
– Smile_Terrible
"Not sure about that one. Dad simultaneously says I’m the smartest person he knows and I don’t know how to do anything lol."
– Puzzleheaded-Job6147
About Grieving
"When both your parents die. I am in my mid 50’s and had my mom pass on Mother’s Day ‘22. My Dad then was living with us from then, and eventually reached in-home hospice status with a sudden stage IV cancer diagnosis. He died in January of this year, and then I got laid off from my tech job and was unemployed for 10 months. Nothing takes the wonderment and positive outlook from the world than having to empty out your childhood home solo and throw everything you grew up with into a big dumpster and are left to wonder what our lives really mean."
– i_spock
Leaving Behind The House You Grew Up In
"I’m in the process of dismantling my childhood home right now. I’ve compared it to dismembering the dead body of a loved one. It’s really rough."
– HaloTightens
"my mum sold my childhood home a decade ago. i won't have to go through that."
– deathschemist
We all want to grow up when we're young. But as soon as reach reach 30, we want to slam on the breaks.
Aimlessness
"I thought I'd grow up, move out, find my footing in the grown up world and basically switch into cruise mode. Now I'm in my 40s and sh*t is confusing as f'k."
– Borsti17
"As adults, nobody knows what they're doing, we're just pretending we do."
– BeautifulMidnight-
Misconception Behind Work Integrity
"Being a hard worker and good at your job doesn't necessarily mean that you'll be rewarded for it."
– DorianOrosco
And the laziest person at work is allowed to be lazy, but the hardest worker isn’t allowed a break."
– Puzzleheaded-Job6147
We Are Our Parents
"Finding out that your parents are people, too, with weaknesses or flaws that you were blind to when you were young."
– tamammothchuk
"And the day you suddenly notice how old they are. When their mortality finally hits you."
– daggerxdarling
Living On Borrowed Time
"Yep had that day earlier this month. Was visiting for dad's 75th birthday."
"As I was leaving, out in the sunshine and fixing to get in the truck, I suddenly saw how small and frail-looking they are now. Mom hit me the hardest. She's started to shrink. They are both healthy, but Dad's just . . . worn."
"Been also doing the math lately. The math where you count up how many times you see them a year and then multiply that by how many years they have left according to the average."
"I've had enough crap and surprise losses in my life that I've long since started parting with family and friends like it might be the last time I get to see them. But that times left to see them calculation really clobbers me with my folks, and it's not even that bad yet for me. Given the ages of my grandparents when they passed I've probably still got somewhere between 150-200 visits."
"But the meter is running."
– Boudyro
I'm at the point where I'm realizing there are no handbooks on life and taking care of our parents.
When you're so used to having them there and taking care of you your whole life, nothing can prepare you for the time when that role reversal happens.
As tough as that may be, however, there's nothing more beautiful in life than returning the favor for the people who loved you unconditionally and raised you.
It's not attractive to gloat.
And there is little more obnoxious than flaunting how wealthy you are.
Particularly if you aren't even that wealthy to begin with.
Indeed, perhaps to make themselves feel more powerful and important than they actually are, many people will try and show off how much money they have in what they wear, eat, live in, and drive.
However, not everyone is so easily fooled, as those in the know can detect a charlatan when they see one.
Redditor aloe_veracity16 was eager to hear the dead giveaways that someone might not be as wealthy as they appear, leading them to ask:
"What’s a dead giveaway that someone is not actually as wealthy as they claim?"
Stating The Obvious...
"When they constantly talk about how wealthy they are."
"A genius doesn't need to tell you they are smart."
"An athlete doesn't need to tell you they are fit."
"And a rich person shouldn't need to tell you they are wealthy."- TigLyon
Attracting Unwanted Attention...
"90% of the wealthy shut the f**k about it, because they learn once they start making good money everyone wants a piece."
"Talking about it constantly = broke AF."- Vladtehwood
Simply By Doing It...
"Making the claim at all is a dead giveaway."- Starfox41
In Plain Sight...
"People who actually ARE wealthy mostly try to hide it."- Matt7738
"Living In A Material World..."
"I'm not well-versed in judging someone's wealth, but I do notice that the fake rich only look rich on social media and try their hardest to go to popular locations celebrities post."
"I know a couple of friends of friends who took out a loan just to keep up the facade that they're all in on the latest iPhones and wearables."
"They built a persona of being a rich kid, so now they have to stay the course."- anima99
Flaunt Modesty, Not Wealth...
"As a person which knows many very rich people."
"I can guarantee that not a single one of them wants to be known as rich."- CompetitivePause9033
Schitts Creek Flirt GIF by CBCGiphyWe Heard You The First Time!!!
"When they repeatedly and adamantly tell you how wealthy they are."- Famous_Bit_5119·
Experiences Over Stuff!
"I feel like actual rich people prioritize vacations/travel, buying their kids cars, paying for their kids/grandkids tuition."
"They don’t spend money on flashy or luxury stuff as much."- Klesea
Summer Time GIF by Merge MansionGiphyAll In The Editing...
"Ever notice how those jet setting influencers that post their pictures out of the airplane window are behind the wing?"
"They're in coach."
"The picture in business is where they stopped to pose on the way through."- Turbulent-Ask-2633
Pack Light...
"Private Jet pilot friend of mine said for the slightly wealthy they bring loads of luggage."
"The ultra rich bring a day bag they have enough money to buy clothes when they get there or already have clothes waiting on them."- hadmeatgotmilk
The Less Said...
"I never met a wealthy person that talks about it."
"They don't need to."- 181Eclipse·
Christina Moses Secrets GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy"See The Pyramid [SCHEMES!] Along The Way..."
"They make a goofy advertisement for some book or course that 'will help you get rich too!'"
"If they were actually rich, they would be on some tropical beach engaging in whatever vices they enjoy most-not hocking some get-rich-quick scheme."- illegalopinion3
All About The Simple Things...
"My dad's entire job is managing millionaire / billionaire philanthropy accounts, so I’ve grown up surrounded by some of the wealthiest people in the country."
"And I never knew until I got older how these 'Mr. Smith' and 'Ms. Jones' people that I’d grown up hanging out with were anything above upper middle class."
"Normal clothes, modest homes, very down to earth and funny people."
"Big wealth, and especially old wealth, is quiet wealth."- Travel_and_Tea·
Anything But Proud...
"I have a family member who insists she and her husband are upper middle class."
"She isn’t."
"She’s rich (8 figures), but it hurts her in some sort of primal way to acknowledge that."
"Her adult brother is also wealthy, although not as much as his sister."
"Likely also 8 figures."
"He insists he’s blue collar and middle class."
"There’s something in their upbringing that makes them ashamed of having 'made it' financially."- strangled_spaghetti
Blue Collar Work GIF by Pudgy PenguinsGiphyPeople will try to come off as wealthier than they are for a multitude of reasons.
But just like any facade, keeping it up eventually becomes untenable.
This is why it's always most important to be grateful for the things you have, rather than flaunt what you wish you had.
