
Get it together people! Looking for a job isn't a fun experience but it certainly isn't a difficult experience to do it right. In fact if you apply like a functioning adult you may discover the hunt will take less time. A resume is a basic -and I do mean BASIC- part of finding a job. It's job search 101. How in the world do you do this wrong? These people will tell you.
Redditor u/jamo8211 wanted employers to give some advice on what NOT to do by asking.... Employers of Reddit what's the worst CV you've ever seen?
Neglected.
I just had a pretty entertaining one. Picture of the person applying, what I think was supposed to be the local time, and plenty of bullets. Each bullet was highlighted in a blue or green, then at the end of many of them, it just said: Neglected.
All these skills: Neglected. Wtf? Gogogodzirra
Cutesy....
It had a horrible font, was brightly colored and had cutesy paw prints on. mallocuproo
One maybe, but 10?
My old boss kept a file of CVs he thought were terrible, and pulled them out here and there for a laugh. This is for an ESL school, so there were a few from non-native English speakers with really obvious spelling mistakes that should have been caught by any spell-check program.
And then there was the guy who attached like 10 passport photos of himself to the file. Like... why? One maybe, but 10? Why so many? You could just feel the ego dripping out of every sentence in the whole thing, too. scarreddragon28
the shortlist....
Not an employer, but looked over CV's to create a shortlist for a job. Worst was one that was half complete (got half way and had a line that said 'to be completed later'). The other, not a CV , but a covering letter about why they wanted the job, what they could do, etc but it completely missed the point of the job/job description (we were defending claims and this letter went on about helping claimants, doing the claimants justice). Both got rejected as the job involved attention to detail and research - neither had proven they could do this. colony_gamer
"expression of interest"
I work in higher ed and my last role included being responsible for tracking all the applications of interest, which was a year-round, open application for adjuncts who might be available to teach last minute. This one guy kept popping up over and over again when I would update my spreadsheet for the hiring committee. He went to a lot of trouble to create a new username for each submission, because, since it was always open, you can't re-apply for the same position.
That dude's CV was just one page, and I could never figure out why he was submitting it to me. There was nothing about teaching or education on the document, and he didn't include any people as references in the system. He would just type "N/A" in the boxes or "see resume."
The single-page was just his name in a really large font at the top (everything was centered on the page, too), followed by his place and date of birth, his wife's name and when they got married, the names and birthdates of his children (including stepson), a long list of hobbies and interests (reading John Grisham, fishing, vacations with family, TV shows).
That was it. I don't know if he thought an "expression of interest" was just like expressing his interests, and I always wondered why he dedicated so much time to apply for a job I wasn't sure he understood. MrsAnthropy
James in the 3rd person....
A guy's resume read like a story told in the 3rd person.
"James has been interested in IT since he took his first computer class at _____ Jr High. He always excelled at typing, getting high marks in his word processing course at ____ High School. Since then, he has moved on to deeper knowledge with computers, computer systems, and what makes them tick.
James build his first computer in his bedroom from parts he scavenged from Skid Row in 1996. He gained a great amount of still learning how components fit together and how hardware and software join together to make synergies. He took this love of computers and worked at _____ PC Repair in the summer of 2001, building, repairing, and reinstalling hardware, soft-ware, and operating systems (OS's)."
And on and on for several more paragraphs. Typos included. Arkayb33
"God-fearing"
I've worked in recruitment for almost 4 years now. I've seen some of the worst CVs ever. Here are some examples
- Some people would put "God-fearing" as one of their qualifications. I mean I get we're a religious country but like ??? why
- "Skills: Accounting"
- Those that have "[Insert text here]" that was left unedited
- I would get CVs/Resumes sent through my email that they probably forgot to rename (e.g. Resume_of_mine.pdf)
And many more I cant recall at the moment. arcticmonkeysVEVO
Choo-Choo....
We were hiring for flight dispatchers at my previous company. Come across a guy's resume where it says he was a "Train Operator/Engineer." We were intrigued as to why someone would leave working for UP, BNSF, etc for a flight dispatcher position until we read the second page which had the actual job description:
He was the conductor of the train inside the local mall for kids. Kudos for the wordplay but don't waste my time. tracksuits4all
Resolutions....
One guy, he had a period of 4 years where he listed his job as a "Stay at home dad", under which he wrote "learned conflict resolution techniques." MantisToboggan14
Keep the Selfie.....
Managed an electronics retail store so not too many resumes, but lots of terrible applications nonetheless. Had someone list being tall and swimming as skills. Recently had someone who did attach a resume, in which he put both his references AND experience as "available upon request," and listed his nationality, birthdate, parents' names, and marital status below a selfie. ShepardVakarian
We took attendance....
Their resume said they worked at a previous company that I also worked for. We had only about a dozen employees, and he wasn't one of them. Reasonable_Audience
I don't know them....
Unfortunately, the worst I've ever seen was submitted by my friend who I vouched for before he submitted his resume. Now, we were in all the same college classes, and mostly all the same project groups. So his resume should/could have contained all the same stuff my first resume did, plus what he did the 2 years out of college. I didn't have a whole lot of impressive stuff being just out of college when I applied, but it was well formatted and thought out.
He submitted a jumbled pile of crap. There was at least 4 different fonts, random missing bullets, no sort of organization, missing important dates and keywords. We did the hiring as a team, but my boss handed me his resume and asked "Is this your friend? Is this what he's capable of?" To be honest, I was shocked, because my friend did well in school and was pretty intelligent. All I could say was "He's better in person, and can figure stuff out even if he's never learned it before."
I got him the interview, and my boss wouldn't put him past the first interview. He said it was a horrible interview, and my friend showed no interest and couldn't elaborate on any of the bullet points on his resume whatsoever. It was absolutely shocking and embarrassing for me. CasuallyCompetitive
Maybe it's one long name?
I received a resume by email from "John." The email address had the name as "George" listed. The resume was for "Max." So three different names for one resume.
As if that wasn't bad enough, it was more of a story of his life in paragraph format than citing his skills. my_Favorite_post
You're not J.K. Rowling!
My boss once received a resume written from the perspective of someone witnessing the storming of the Bastille. The torches, explosions off in the distance, the yelling and screaming. Proficiency in Word and Excel.
It was for an assistant level office job. My boss passed on it. soomuchcoffee
He's a recommendation....
I had a guy apply to an online job posting, but all he sent was a picture of his dog and somehow no contact information. LibbyLewis
Don't judge a tattoo by it's cover.
I do staffing and you wouldn't believe the resumes I have seen.
One time I was trying to fill a 3rd shift warehouse role for minimum wage and it was a super urgent need for our client and in a remote area. The only guy with experience I could get to bite was... Very interesting.
All his resume said was "I've done warehouse stuff for a long time.. I have F**K YOU tatted on my forehead.. Please let me get in front of you though, I'm the definition of don't judge a book by the cover."
Screened the guy, skyped with him, and had him come in to meet with me. He was great. I let the client know what to expect before sending him on the interview. They hired him on the spot. datacollect_ct
The Green Thumb.
A guy applying for a position in agriculture research just sent a photo of a plant in his backyard. funk_truck
You sir do not look like the photo you submitted, this interview is OVER! TomasNavarro
Plot twist: The plant got hired. WizardsVengeance
Such Strength....
I wasn't the employer, but a secretary asked to print off all the cover letters and resumes that had come in. In one person's cover letter, I couldn't help but notice a sentence that had (company name) in one of the paragraphs. The person missed spot they were meant to fill in, in this obvious template of a cover letter. I found it funny that they listed, "attention to detail" as one of their greatest strengths. ToughTriflenb
Tell me more about David!
We were hiring for a position in IT recently. One applicant was this lady, around 60. Used to work in IT in the 90s, then quit to watch her daughters children. Most recent job was cashiering in a supermarket.
From her CV I learned: when she was 17 she visited the US for a couple of weeks on a student exchange program, where she met "David." They fell in love. Afterwards they kept in contact, until he eventually came to our country and they got married. They had an exciting life, being roadies for rock bands and such. Somewhere along the line they managed to finish Uni and had two daughters. David was the love of her life.
Then something happened (unfortunately she didn't elaborate), and David isn't in her life anymore. I never found out whether he died or they got divorced or something. She devoted all her energy to her daughters and their offspring, since that was all she had left of David. Now after the grandchildren are old enough, she wants to work in IT again.
David's name appeared in the application (CV+cover letter) a whopping 17 times. Sometimes I wonder what happened to him. Lazycat0204
Maybe you should apply to Maury?
I work for one of the largest staffing firms in the United States, so I've seen probably well over one thousand CV's in my tenure here. I wouldn't say this was a "bad" CV, more that it was just the funniest one I've ever seen.
We receive a lot of applications through typical job boards such as Indeed or CareerBuilder, and when they apply we get sent an email that has their CV attached to it with the job they applied for.Photo by Markus Winkler on Unsplash
Easily one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my 2 years at this company, we laughed about it for hours.SuperSmashOSU
Or did you mean 'Werky?'
I think it was submitted as a joke (I hope), but it had official header info (name and contact info), but was blank underneath and said, in hand-scrawl: "Me need worky."
What bothered me most is that I would have spelled it "Workie."CitizenCAN_mapleleaf
But could she Bend & Snap?
I'm not sure if it's the worst, but it was the most entertainingly bad. Ya know in Legally Blonde where Reese Witherspoon gives out her resume and its on pink, scented paper?
I got one like that that about 3 years ago, which, looking it up on google just now to confirm, made this reference 15 years out of date (though if it was scented, I missed it). The resume started off, literally her first paragraph, talking about how Legally Blonde was her favorite movie. It was full of doodles in the margins and specifically requested I not contact her previous employers because she felt she was fired unfairly, and instead listed several sorority sisters as references.
She compared herself to Elle Woods several times, explicitly saying any hiring manager who wouldn't hire her off of this resume was doing so because their couldn't handle her individuality. I'm honestly not entirely sure if this was a legit resume or some kind of joke. It had almost nothing to do with the job listing. My manager joked that Buzzfeed was gonna write about me if I didn't call.
The job went unfilled. We chose literally no one over this. linguotgr
All the Info....
I received one which just said "I have no skills cuz I never worked before but I have my GED." Nothing else.
On a different resume I received, the candidate listed his height. He was 5'5. I don't know why he thought that would be relevant. notatallimsure
Yogi 2020....
I am not making this up. I was doing the hiring for a company and a guy put on a line of his 'qualities' that he was "smarter than the average bear" For those of you that don't know, this was a favorite line from the main character in the cartoon Yogi Bear. BeefheartLives
Oh Andrew....
It was worst I've ever seen, but also my favorite.
My company does business with a certain family friendly theme park. This means our employees can't have visible tattoos, crazy hair colors, they need to be able to pass a drug screening, background check, etc. I received a resume for a sales position from a guy we will call Andrew. I just pulled it back up so I can quote it word for word. The cover letter said:
"Hey what's good? I have worked at almost every fast food place around but now it's time to try something new. I don't know how to do retail but I'll learn. I don't have official sales experience of the legal kind of you know what I mean, but that was a few weeks ago and I'm not like that no more"
On his resume he listed the places he worked at and had descriptions such as, "take peoples orders and clean up their messes" and "take peoples orders money and give them their s**t"
I thought the resume was submitted as a joke until I looked Andrew up on Facebook (he had an uncommon last name) and found his profile. watching-the-office
You're full of Swiss....
It was mostly a bunch of bullet points about why he didn't like cheese. Haha! His last job was at a cheese factory.
I suspect he was fired from there and didn't want to say, so he kind of over played the not liking cheese thing as a reason for leaving.
It was still very weird to be on a CV though. thermonuclearmuskrat
It's a Secret...
I got one with a first name only, no address, no email, no phone number. Even if I wanted to hire him, there was no way to get ahold of him. Token_Black_Rifle
The BF will help....
Just yesterday I was interviewing a girl that mentioned "SQL curiosity" in her CV. So it's the middle of the interview and I randomly ask her if she is confident with SQL to which she responds "Well, I personally don't know how it works, but my boyfriend is a programmer and is very good at it."
No, we did not hire her boyfriend. martinkarolev
Coffee is LIFE!!!
I helped my old boss scan through CVs a while back.
A student applying for a job as a barista. Their opening line "I don't believe coffee is a drink, I believe it is an experience and you need me to be the face of that journey." He had a little waffle about how coffee changed his life and molded him as a person, how coffee has been his savior in university.
This kid seemed to really be into coffee, it was well written but we were a coffee shop in a shopping centre, we didn't need his prose. He was an English student and the CV read as if it was a piece of course work. The whole thing was in comic sans and the only experience he had down was "Coffee drinker for 19 years" the kid was 19. He didn't get the job, but I'm sure he graduated well with how well the opening letter was written though. Monjara
I Love Font.
Font size 30pt, comic sans, and just described her appearance. "I am looking for a job." izyozy
One of my worst was the opposite. 10pt font, 3 pages, front-and-back describing minute technical details of like every job they'd held in the last 20 years. Dude, you may be qualified, but I'll never know because no one's got time to read your novella in the middle of the work day. disappointer
Accidents Happen...
I had a guy who sent in a resume where he had accidentally pasted an internet banner ad for porn to the top of it. Who knows how many of those he sent out... stars_are_silent
The pillow.
Our office had a submission for a legal assistant and under skills was "always sleeps with one eye open." lcat729
Gripping her pillow tight ? 🤘🏻 slinky999
Health First....
Wasn't really bad, but he did have a section that stood out.
HEALTH: In good health.
I was hiring EMTs for a health screening, so I can kind of understand it, but just weird.... IrishMedicNJ
So Glossy.
My MIL once got one for her accounting office that was a bog standard CV for an low-ranking accounting position.
And attached to it was a huge glossy photo of the applicant on the beach, sprawled on the sand at sunset, with a focus on her ample assets. ky0nshi
By the Slice.
I worked in a cafe and the guy whose job was to wash dishes, showed me his cv for an upcoming job interview
It specified that he 'can cut Mahon cheese, very good thin slice.'
The job was for security. thehazzanator
Skimping....
I needed someone to work at a gas station. Guy applied and his resume said he was the assistant manager everywhere he worked previously. Except he abbreviated it without punctuation.
That's right. He was a 5 time fool Man looking to pump your tank. casualblair
Oh the Young....
Not unusual or sadly unique, but when I was working at pub I was good mates with the manager, and we'd often have a scan through CVs that had been dropped in by young people looking for a job after they left school.
Most of these kids were like 16 or 17 at most, but had CVs that ran to three or four pages. Even someone in their 40s going for a high-flying management job at a world-leading financial company on a few million £ a year should only have one or two pages MAX.
These kids had done nothing aside from GCSE and maybe a paper round, bit of volunteering at most, and that's perfectly fine and reasonable when you're 16 and straight out of school.
What the hell do they get taught in school? To fill out as much crap as possible to make it look good? Why aren't schools teaching them that writing about how they enjoy going to the cinema or gardening with their Dad (a genuine inclusion) is not going to get them a job.
It was waiting-on work at a country pub. Putting nothing except "I have all my limbs and the normal number of chromosones" would have over-qualified them. aegeaorgnqergerh
It's Art.
Own a video production/advertising company. After the first year of business, we were expanding into three different cities. For each city we were wanting two graphic designers, job listings go up, toms of applicants. Since this is & still is my baby, I do all the hiring personally. I go over all the CV's, interview, etc. Cue Mr. Word Art. Not only did he apply for the job in all 3 cities that were up to a thousand miles apart, keep in mind no moving costs etc because we were looking for someone already established in said big city, he sent in three different resumes.
Now, these resumes weren't just any resumes, they were completely, 100% made with word art. The weirdest thing is, they were sent in as a .jpg, so not even a print to PDF, just a screen shot. Each resume contained the same information, but used different, "art," to state the same info. Hands down the worst yet funniest resume I've ever seen. just_a_manatee
Services Rendered.
I got a resume from an actual prostitute once. She included it on her resume... along with the name of the company and website you could go to book her "services" Listed under her job description was "assessing and meeting clients needs and desires." tossaway587
One would think we're in a place in time where all conversations should be easy.
But that is not the case.
So much is still too "taboo" to be truthful about.
It is so frustrating.
There is so much to discuss.
Being shy is understandable, but it's something that we can all get over.
Redditor No_One_Special34 wanted to breakdown some barriers with a few simple conversations, so they asked:
"What is a taboo subject that should be talked about more?"
Speak Up
"Child/infant death. When my daughter died a bunch of people just... stopped talking to me altogether."
BaronMatfei
"I'm sorry to hear about your child."
"A 7-year-old was hit by a truck last week near my son's kg. I've never met the boy but I have had nightmares about it. I can't imagine what the parents are going thru right now. I can't imagine what you are going through."
ikalwewe
"This happened to my mom when my brother died. Nobody knew what to say so few people said anything, and then it was treated like it didn’t happen."
myspiritedconfusion
The Aging Process
"Nursing homes."
Limp_Distribution
"We are a disgustingly ageist society. No wonder people pay BILLIONS for plastic surgery, hair color, and fitness, etc to stay relevant and not be thought of as useless or 'other.' It’s so very hateful. I think our society fears old age and death. It’s a f**king pathos."
Playful-Reflection12
"THANK YOU! I'm a 20-year paramedic. One of the things that I really hoped COVID would shed a light on is the absolutely abhorrent treatment of our elderly and infirmed. The 'treatment' in far too many nursing homes is negligent to a criminal level."
MedicSBK
That's Easy...
"Household budgets and finance - how much your parents make, how much is the mortgage, car insurance, car payment, and so on."
davmoha
"That's easy. House, two cars, three kids, stay-at-home wife, pets, college tuition for everyone in the bank, a summer cottage home by the lake, and a hobby like golf should all do if you're a hardworking drug dealer nowadays."
aaar129
"Agreed! We have gone into detail about our finances with our kids. We have them pick jobs on LinkedIn and a home on Zillow and budget so expenses and have them watch as they realize they can't afford expensive stuff on a crap salary. It's been really great."
HoidWit
Look for the Signs...
"Familial abuse."
"Many people tend to assume that abusive people look creepy/scary and behave badly in general, but they don't seem to get that anyone can be abusive, regardless of appearance or demeanor. An abusive person can easily be charming, attractive, funny, witty, etc."
"Just because you think someone has a few positive qualities does not mean they're incapable of abuse."
"If someone's child 'seems' happy and well behaved, it does not mean that they are automatically OK or safe. There are many signs of abuse, and I wish that more people educated themselves on this issue. We can literally save lives by doing so."
ArtisanalMagi
The Girl Truth
"Girls need to know everything there is to know about menstruation before they experience it. At my school we were only given a quick 'every month you will bleed out your vagina, you can use pads or tampons to absorb it.' Nothing about any of the other mental or physical effects, nothing about how to deal with them, and nothing else reassuring."
IJustpeedyourpants
Why are girls not taught more sooner?
Like what year are we living in?
The End
"Death."
fallen-summer
"Number one for me, especially out-of-order deaths (young deaths). My husband died when I was 33 and he was 38. It's been almost 3 years and people still struggle with how to talk to me. We need to talk about death more as a society."
veganbettie
Only Legal One
"Alcoholism, especially in older generations."
Kaverim
"The biggest drug in the world, the most dangerous, only legal one. Alcohol has been disguised to make society believe it isn't even a drug. Now we're all hooked and can't go a week without a drink, funny because the cravings come back within a week."
Unlucky_Ducky23
"I quit drinking 18 months ago and it kinda sucks because if you want to go meet new ppl or go on a date it usually involves alcohol."
mspote
She's 75
"Comprehensive sex ed. My mother never had sex ed and was convinced that vaginal discharge wasn't normal and that your crotch didn't sweat."
Nay_nay267
"My mother had a condition that requires her to use a catheter. She was shocked to learn that she doesn't urinate from her vagina, and that the opening to her urethra is actually slightly above it. She's 75. I'm a dude, and I've known that since I was 14."
UniversalHammer71
"She was raised Catholic, and her mother taught her nothing. Not even what her period was. She was convinced she was dying."
Nay_nay267
Follow the Money
"Financial debt. In my line of work, I see people's bank accounts and credit reports every day and it is very rare that someone has zero debt. Excluding mortgages (which is a given) the vast majority have car finance, personal loans, and credit card balances. Mostly it's manageable, credit is mostly a convenience for which a person pays interest."
"But debt can also destroy a person. It can keep you up at night feeling like you're literally suffocating. It can lead to suicide. I know because I was close at one point. I don't know if I would have actually gone through with it but I had planned it to the point of measuring rope from the timbers in my attic to my neck and to ensure my feet wouldn't touch the ground."
"If you are in debt you are not alone, you're in the majority. If it's a struggle, notify the lenders/creditors; they're legally obligated to offer options to help you. It might reduce your credit score a bit but please don't ever reduce your life instead."
"Life is precious and money isn't. If you're struggling financially please speak to someone. There is no shame in it, pretty much everyone is struggling financially so someone will understand but please don't let a credit card balance be the reason your life ends."
kitjen
Holy Crap!
"Pooping and poop problems. Colon cancer is so common and relatively treatable, but like all cancers, it's so much better to catch it early - yet so many people are too embarrassed to talk about poop problems, and they don't bring it up with their doctor until it's too late."
"I have ulcerative colitis and make sure all my friends know I'm totally comfortable talking about poop if they ever have any questions about whether something happening to them is normal or concerning."
dorunrun
Speak more. Speak louder. We've all been quiet too long.
As much as we might try to take care of our things, there are going to be instances where we lose things that we love.
Ironically, those lost things might be some of the most meaningful things we have in our lives.
Redditor baba_yaga_777 asked:
"If someone offered you a box of everything you ever lost, what would you look for first?"
A Mother's Brooch
"The brooch I bought for my mom's birthday when I was five years old (60 years ago)."
"I took all my money out of my bank and walked to the local Hallmark store. The nice lady took my money (probably less than $2) and wrapped up the gift."
"When my mom opened her gift, we walked back to the store 'to thank the lady for wrapping it so nicely.' It was actually so my mom could offer to pay the rest of the cost of that beautiful brooch. The lady wouldn't accept any more money, though."
"And here we are, 60 years later, and I still remember the incredible kindness of that lady."
"I don't have the brooch or my mom, but I do have this memory."
- BakeCrochetGym
Childhood Photos
"When we left Yemen during the civil war in 1994, it was rushed and we lost a handbag that had all family photos from 15 to 20 years prior. It sucks not to have pictures of me when I was younger."
- gahgeer-is-back
The Perfect Fit
"My swim trunks for this summer. I just got them last year and they fit me perfectly, and now I can't find them for the life of me. It p**ses me off thinking about it."
- karmagod13000
All Progress Saved
"The 'Pokémon Crystal' game that I had leveled all of my favorite characters up to Level 80. The housecleaner swiped it and my parents wouldn’t believe me. F**k you, Julie."
- YourStolenCharizard
Lost Loved Ones
"My daughter. She was gone way too quick."
- WhatWouldTNGPicardDo
A Beloved Baby Blanket
"My childhood blankie. I have no idea what happened to it!"
- plasma_dan
"I somehow managed not to lose or destroy mine and gave it to my firstborn child. He still keeps it in his bed and turns seven soon. I think I’d ask for that too if it was lost."
- Lampyridae2A
Former Best Friends
"My best friend from my formative years."
- TrixonBanes
"Oof, same. She was like a sister to me. She lives on the other side of the country now and, even though we grew apart, I miss how I felt when I spent time with her."
- MaynardButterBean
Favorite Stuffies
"The stuffed platypus I had when I was in elementary. Every time my mom mentions finding stuff in my grandpa's house, I ask about it."
- JenniferMcKay
In Exchange for Toxic Relationships
"The self-esteem that I allowed others to destroy during a phase of illness."
- DeviantAvocado
Past Creations
"High school sketchbook full of emo edgy drawings."
- strangedigital
The Family Ring
"My mum's ring she'd been given by her Grandma that I pawned (my mum agreed at the time but always regretted it afterwards)."
"I got way, way less than its worth, since the guy took advantage of my age and desperation. The worst thing is, I can't even remember the design so can't ever have it replicated and can't ask my mum because she passed away earlier this year."
- -qqqwwweeerrrtttyyy-
Holiday Cheer
"Holiday cheer."
"Sure, I still love holidays but… as a kid, it was like, 'Holy mother of everliving f**k, Halloween is in THREE WEEKS? That is entirely too long. I will never be able to wait. Holy d**n.' And when it finally arrived, I'd have the night of my life."
"Now it’s like, 'Oh no. Halloween is in two days. Uh... Oh well...'"
- GregthePigeon
The Sea of Lost Picks
"As a guitarist, all of my f**king picks."
- ivaclue
Junk Drawers and Boxes
"The box I lost that had everything in it."
- Actuaryba
Quite the Conundrum
"The issue is that I can't recall what I've lost."
- ragnrokis
We've all lost things in our lives, some more important than others.
It's especially telling that at least most of us know exactly what we would seek first, before anything else that might possibly be in that box.
There are several things that are appealing to hikers.
Being out in nature and taking in some fresh air is a huge motivation for people to get out of the house.
Getting exercise is also a factor to maintain a healthy heart.
But there could be one unexpected element to a hike that can happen hypothetically, and it's sure to raise your heartbeat.
Specifically, seeing something shocking along the hiking trail, like, say, a naked person could make for an exciting–or disturbing–hiking outing. It certainly doesn't get any more au natural than that.
Curious to hear from strangers, Redditor spenf asked:
"What would be your reaction if you encountered a nude hiker?"
These Redditors assessed the situation and saw no harm.
Friendly Tip
"I have passed two nude hikers in my 35 years of hiking. One male, one female, years and thousands of miles apart. Both said 'hello'. I said 'hello.' One mentioned the trail was washed out ahead but a second trail has been cut. I thanked them for the heads-up. Some people like the wind and sun on their skin. Both had on hiking boots. To each their own."
– Zmirzlina
Sign Of Good Character
"I have. Three times! I'm an avid backpacker and you can usually find me in Yosemite, SeKi, Emigrant or Carson-Iceberg in California on any random summer weekend."
"My standard line: 'Afternoon, I didn't realize it was so cold out today!'"
"One of them didn't get the joke. The other two laughed their nude a**es off."
"Here's my reasoning. If you're naked and can laugh at a joke, you're probably not a threat."
– codefyre
Two Scenarios
"Depends. A hiker with hiking boots/shoes and a backpack, but otherwise nude, or a completely nude person on a hiking trail?"
"Scenario 1: I give a friendly wave and hike on."
"Scenario 2: I give a more tentative wave and hike on, maintaining a heightened awareness of my surroundings."
– Genshed
Casual Encounter
"I met one once. A middle aged man in ok shape. Had nice hiking boots, thick wool socks, fancy framed backpack, two walking poles, hat, sunglasses, and nothing else on."
"I said hi in a neutral voice, he replied hi in an equally neutral voice. We passed, I did not look back."
– SillyFlyGuy
Some hikers are suspect.
High Alert
"While backpacking out of Rocky Mountain National Park we encountered a dude wearing nothing but shoes and some very small shorts. He was off trail about 100' at the edge of a meadow, walking and swinging a machete. I...did not approach. He was probably a mile in from the trail head. I'm guessing drugs."
– DoctFaustus
Beware Of Black Magic
"Ha! There are a lot of superstitious rumors/stories circulating around scenario 2 in India. Apparently, people who practice black magic with the sole intent of harming someone are often seen walking naked in places you don't expect people, carrying weird items."
"Either you interrupt them by disturbing them (no clue what happens next) or you run in the opposite direction."
– longlegs25
You may want to take note.
"I live in the Bay Area and naked hikers are not uncommon."
"Good naked hiker: has appropriate shoes, a backpack or fanny pack, is hiking with intention and looks tanned and fit and like he does this regularly. Good naked hikers will give you room so you don't have to interact unless you really want to."
"Bad naked hiker: shoeless, visible sores, scrapes, or burns, moving erratically (i.e. really slow or in a zig-zag). Might be a drugged out person. Out-of-shape or pale are indications this is not normal for them and they may not have intended for this to happen."
"Exhibitionist: makes a point to make eye contact, smile at you, wave, try to involve you. Good naked hikers are usually on long, deep trails where they're less likely to encounter others, and they tend to give clothed hikers a wide breath out of a sense of respect and consent. Exhibitionists get chummy; it excites them to be seen naked."
– IAlbatross
"Also depends on the area. A deep woods area with long trails is ideal for naked hiking. Shorter and more accessible trails are less okay because there's a higher likelihood of encountering families with children."
"Also depends on if they're with friends or not. A group of naked hikers is less concerning than an individual."
"All this boils down to:"
"If you see a naked hiker, mind your own business. A good naked hiker isn't trying to bother you. A bad naked hiker is potentially dangerous. An exhibitionist wants attention so any attention paid to them will fuel them. Best thing to do is nod as you pass and carry on like you haven't even noticed."
"Edit: There are actually areas in the Bay Area where it's permitted to hike naked. Regionally, some places allow nudity. Also some places allow women to be topless so a topless female hiker might just be evening out her tan. It's best not to assume and to know the local laws before passing judgement on a person getting their nature on."
– IAlbatross
Guilty as charged.
The Name Is A Dead Giveaway
"No reaction at all, since I would be nude myself."
– NudistGeek
"Stare in disbelief. That's just very strange and coincidental for two nude hikers to run into each other."
"I guess make sure they have sunscreen also."
– miketdavis
To each their own, but if hiking in the nude is your thing, you do you.
And just a heads up: If you're walking around in the buff and happen to be wielding a machete, you're going to make people very jittery. So maybe drop the prop.
Also, wear plenty of sunscreen.
30 is the new 20.
At least, that's what a lot of people tell themselves after they pass that milestone birthday.
Even so, while age is merely a number, people still find certain things grow increasingly more challenging with each passing year.
Including, or even particularly, dating.
Those still on the hunt for love after turning 30 might grow increasingly insecure, worry that their moment has passed, or be unable to ignore the ticking of their biological clock reminding them that time might be running out to start a family.
Not to mention, playing a losing game over and over can become completely and utterly exhausting after a while.
"What is the hardest part of dating after 30?"
Not Everyone Wants A Package Deal
"Realizing that the number of single parents is larger than you’d expect."- dhabo1030
"Some people have kids or want them soon."
"And emotional baggage."- Psyblade0_0
"Kids, whether you have them or not, is something to talk and consider immediately before starting anything."- Crisb89
"For me, it was finding someone who didn't have kids, and didn't want them."
"At that point in my life, I was (and still am) 100% sure I don't want kids."
"Finding a long-term partner who wants the same was pretty tough."- Toiletpaperplane
Everyone's In A Hurry
"'Dating after 30 is like catching a city bus after midnight'."
"'There aren't as many, but they're faster'."- civex
How Long Have You Got?
"Online dating sucks and all my friends are married or dead or single fathers."
"So I am on my own for the most part."- somedude-83
"It's not all fun and games anymore."
"People feel late or behind."
"First dates often: are we compatible, do you want kids, are you OK with my kids, are you ready for a serious relationship, do you make enough money, do you own a home, politics?"
"Religion."
"I don't have time to mess with you if we aren't a match because I'm in my 30s and supposed to be married and having kids."
"The days of just light fun dating are less common."- ZLVe96
Emotional And/Or Excess Baggage
"Geez."
"You sometimes pay for what their ex did to them."- JJJAAABBB123
Rising Standards And Expectations
"You have your preferences narrowed down a LOT more than you did in your 20s, thus finding a compatible partner is more difficult."
"Especially if you dislike kids."- Clintman
"Many people want 'high value' partners while having no value."- Zetterburger40
Solo routines Can Be Hard To Shake...
"I've learned I prefer my own company."- PrinceEnternalStench
Alternative Methods...
"The summoning rituals you have to go through."- AdCareful5654
Wait Till Your 40s...
"Wait until they’re over 45."
"Most are divorced and have been alone for a while."
"It‘s a reset of dating and they’re open to try something new."
"That person who was out of your league is now squarely in your court."
"Go for it!"- macgiv
Good Luck Getting A Good Night's Sleep...
"CPAP Machines."- Reddit
As long as you are single, finding love is one of the many things you think you might never achieve with each passing year.
However, when you do finally find that one true love, no matter when or how old you are, you will realize in no time at all it was definitely worth the wait.