Losing your job is embarrassing. Being fired is extremely so. Some people make mistakes, but some people face consequences completely disproportionate to whatever it was they did. These are their stories.
u/imnutothis asked Reddit:
People who have been straight up fired on the spot. What happened?
Here were some of those answers.
Dodged A Ribeye
Chef here. Got fired because I sent a steak out that "had char on it".
The only "char" on it was grill marks.
Ok lady, you probably just saved me a huge mess.
Played Yourself
I handed my boss my two week notice and she ripped it in half and said "Don't bother, you're done today."
HQ wasn't too thrilled with her decision as they had to pay me a severance because of her hatred towards me.
Haha, I once had the exact opposite happen - I submitted my resignation and my boss refused it. The next day, I received a meeting invite from my VP on my client site - very rare for him to come to me - and when I walked in, the VP, HR, Senior Manager, and Manager were on one side of a long table and there was one chair on the other side for me. They insisted that, despite my moving two states away, we would make it work. It was awkward, as I didn't particularly like working from home (I'm a social creature and if left at home alone, I will play video games all day), but we made it work for another year before we amicably ended my employment.
Revenge!! REEEEVEEEEENGEEEEEE!!!
I came back to my summer job at an amusement park from missing 3 days with strep throat, handed in my doctors excuse, and was fired for missing work. Apparently to call off you couldn't just talk to a manager, you had to talk to the department head, a person I had never met with a phone number that had never been made available to me. Because I missed more than 2 days, it didn't matter that I had a note because I was considered a no call/no show. The assistant manager I gave my excuse to handed me a letter back that said I had 10 minutes to clean out my locker and vacate the premises or they'd call the cops for trespassing.
I was 16, in a state with very liberal employment laws, and my mom retained a lawyer. I didn't win any money but they ended up having to list me as rehire-able in their system and they paid a huge fine for essentially making it impossible for employees to call in sick.
Happy...Holidays?
I was told Friday out of nowhere "we won't be needing your services anymore" after being told in November I would have a position into next year at the minimum. So that's a fun holiday gift.
Same. Let go day before Thanksgiving after 5 years at a company and negotiated my new raise with substantial documentation of my worth to the company.
I was replaced almost immediately and suspect my raise was given to that individual....
Nah, It Was Real
Me and my friend were two young Irish lads working on rebuilding the Canary Wharf tower in London (which had been blown up by some other Irish lads a year earlier, but that's another story.) It was like the Nakatomi Plaza. There were so many floors, if you didn't feel like working, you could just go to some random floor and hide out for a while.
So me and my friend, both 18 years old, were hungover one morning. We went to the 23rd floor where there was a comfortable couch and we lay there smoking weed. Suddenly the English foreman appears and fires us on the spot. As he was walking away, he says "That was taking the piss, lads."
Unfortunately, there was somewhat of a misunderstanding here. What he meant was that our behavior was so bad we had crossed a line. However, in Ireland at that time, "that was taking the piss" meant I'm only joking. So we continued working for another three or four hours before he came back and said "I fired you this morning, what the hell are you still doing here?"
Too Much Of A Threat
I was working for a small family owned restaurant. All the wait staff, and most of the kitchen staff was family or friends with the owner. I was hired as a waitress, and I did okay, not great, not terrible, it was my first time being a waitress.
One day, one of their regular customers came in, who is a bit of a local celebrity. He apparently came in once or twice a week, and tipped very well. Normally the owners daughter would take the taAble, but she was out sick so I took them. I got an amazing tip from him, and he told the owner that he would like me to wait on them if I am available in the future. The second he left I was fired.
I'm Quaking In My Hairnet
I told my manager at a fast food place that I was going to be looking for a new job, and to not schedule me after this pay period. The next week, I see my name on the schedule and ask her what the deal is.
"I told you I was going to get a new job and not to schedule me"
"Well, did you get a new job yet?"
"No. But I'm still not sticking around this one."
"Well you know what, you can just not come back here now with that attitude."
She sure showed me.
Jerk Bosses Who Played Themselves
I was fresh out of College at an IT contract-to-hire job. I came in on a Tuesday, sat down at my desk, the boss/owner came up behind me and told me I was fired. I sat there, mouth open, and then asked, "Why?" He said that I was not a good fit for the company and that I had to leave. So I gathered my things and he stood there watching me (probably making sure I did not steal anything) and escorted me out of the office. I found out later that because of the size of the company, at the time, they were looking for a tier III worker, but I was a tier I; I told them this in the interview, but apparently they did not have the resources to train me. Well jokes on them, I went through a month of unemployment and I found an even better IT job where I make a lot of money and work only half as hard as that job.
Blessings In Disguise
My first job out of college was for a very small dental insurance claims clearing house. The company had recently split from another company, whose name was on the software that all the Dentist offices used, so that was the name they recognized. The two companies were basically fighting over their client base. So, my job was to call up all of their clients to remove the old software from the former partner and install the new janky-*ss sh*t they'd cobbled together since the split.
My job alternated between:
- Calling up customers to install the new software and train them on it
- Troubleshoot the problems with the software and come up with work-arounds, typically during training calls.
Clients typically were finding out from me that the software was changing and I was supposed to insist that it was the same company, just different software.
After almost a year of this, I was getting to a point where it just felt so awful to trudge my way into work because I knew I'd spend the day getting yelled at by clients who were upset that their routines were changing. I spent a lot of my downtime complaining to my friends over my personal email about how awful it was. Probably not the best thing to do, but I was young.
Well, one day I come back from lunch and find the door to my office closed and my boss standing there waiting for me. He showed me the emails he'd printed out from my personal email account with portions of conversations highlighted that he didn't like. I never used any names or revealed company information - just my emotions while working there. He shoved the papers in my hands and said "Explain this to me." I basically said I was just having trouble with the day to day grind, but he just responded with, "I think it's time for you to find something else. Get out of here."
Fine by me. I probably should have left before it got to that point, but hindsight is 20/20 and all that.
What Did You Expect To Happen?
I was 15 I think. I was a lifeguard at a subdivision pool. Being the "new guy" and the "young kid" I worked every weekend. Friday night, Saturday night, Sunday day. I had already missed going to my grandparents a couple of times, and my parents were taking a vacation. I asked off and was told that I couldn't go. My dad basically said, "you are going, I don't care." I told the boss this and she said, you still have to work. I left with my parents, and when I got back there were a dozen messages on my parents answering machine saying that they couldn't open the pool because I wasn't there. She fired me 3 or 4 times that weekend.
She was a bored housewife hired by the HOA to schedule the lifeguards who were mostly high school kids. She fired another for wearing a bikini. They didn't use her the next year, but by that point in time I was 16 and had a better job.
No Dime For A Jerk
Mom, brother and I were at Olive Garden about 20 years ago. We had the worst waiter in the history of the world. He was outrageously rude to the point of being abusive to us. At the end of the dinner my mom left him a dime for a tip and as we were leaving the waiter threw the dime at my mom (I was a little kid otherwise I would have probably at least attempted to defend her). Waiter's boss saw the dime throw and fired the waiter on the spot. Everyone has a bad day, but that guy was just a prick.
Not Doing Your Work For Ya, Bucko
A colleague (from another department, always borderline hostile) had emailed my boss that I no-showed a call while on the job. Terminated immediately.
This wasn't possible though, as I had documentation that I showed to the call. And it's also not possible to no-show a call. Like, people literally die. If one can't go, you call your partner to go for you. But in my case I had gone there. All my documentation proved I had been there.
Theirs on the other hand, did not. But my manager skipped the investigation on this. No checking call logs, no checking notes (legally binding documents), no even hearing my side. Came in in the morning, asked me if I had gone to a call 5 days ago, I asked what the documentation said and he said we're ending your employment. Good manager!
Don't Ride An Engineer
I was an engineer at a company. Glorified term for the guy who designs construction projects and orders the material on smaller scale telecom projects. The owner of the company would take a big group of installers to install the projects. He was always riding us engineers to use up smaller pieces of inventory from the warehouse instead of ordering brand new stuff (for example do not order the 10' piece of steel if you can have the warehouse pull a 4' from our stock).
Well I would design the projects and only order the longer pieces if it was part of my design requiring and I would bid the project based on that design. Never failed the owner would go to site with his rag tag group, tear apart my design, build it completely different than my design, and then bitch at me for ordering too much material (he would send me nasty emails copying everyone). Keep in mind that he would install the job with a much different design than we bid for which means our quotes should have been reduced per our contract with our client.
I finally had enough of him berating me and sent a nasty email response to one of his belittling emails he sent and copied the entire world like he always does. I show up to work and my direct line supervisor laid me off. I knew very well that my email would probably get me fired and that I was burning a bridge but I already had another job lined up and it felt so good to tell that guy to f*ck off. My manager was laughing about the email as he was telling me that he had to lay me off.
3 months after all of this the owners wife was calling me and asking if there was anyway in would return. I declined for obvious reasons.
All That For Nothing
It was my first job, I think I was 16 or 17 at the time. I worked at a local grocery store a couple days a week as a cashier.
One morning my dad had just dropped me off at work and it was a slow Sunday morning. A couple hours into my shift a girl comes in and buys a pack of cigarettes. I forgot to ID her and turns out she was underage and it was one of those sting things. (which when I worked there I did not know that was even a thing that happened.) Well a guy comes in with the same girl and talks to the manager. Tells him what happened. After the two leave he pulls me to the side and tells me that I am fired. I was devastated because I was a really good kid and followed by the rules and hated getting in trouble.
I then go outside call my dad and the minute he answered I burst into tears. I tell him that I need him to pick me up because I was fired. He comes picks me up I tell him what happened and he calms me down. Then my mom comes home from church and tell her what happened. She was fuming. My mom was saying that I should not have been selling cigarettes or alcohol in the first place because it is illegal for a minor to do so. Then my mom and I go back to the store and my mom is talking to the manager how it is wrong. That I was not supposed to be selling them in the first place and etc. After all that the manager says that I can have my job back I just cannot be a cashier anymore, but my mom refused to let me work there anymore.
Do I Need A Hall Pass?
I was 3 months in my job and I was getting harassed by my manager constantly for several weeks. Every day they'd follow me to the bathroom and make comments the whole time I needed to be in there.
I felt uncomfortable with this and reported it to HR, the next day the president of the company came to the office, and summoned me and the HR rep.
He brought up my concerns, and asked me what I wanted. I said I just wanted him to be professional and not follow me to the bathroom every time I have to go.
After I finished, he said, "Okay... well. Here's the thing. I've read the reports, and it just doesn't look like you're a good fit here. It's within 90 days, so we're just going to terminate your employment immediately. You'll be escorted out."
And that was it. I hated myself for opening that can of worms, but at the same time f*ck that guy.
Sayonara, Bye-bye
Sears used to pay their electronics folks commission on top of base pay for big items. It was a pretty nice rate for commission. Anyways, we would "price match" compared to Frys or Best Buy (this was '05). Sometimes we made up Best Buy prices and would just say it was a promo weekend there.
I wasn't a great salesman and would incentivize customers to buy out of desperation. I'd take off like $400 sometimes.
One time a customer and I really hit it off. Super nice folks, came in around the holidays. I got on first name basis with em by the end. Anyways, lost prevention called me in and showed me on camera making the sale, I slipped up and said oh that's "Ed and his family." They thought I knew them on a real friend or family basis and gave them a $2900 tv for $2400. Fired on the spot.
Pay your workers more than $7/hour base and you won't see shit like that. People will sort out a way to cheat the system on you if you pay pennies. I got away with price matching probably 20 times before I got called on it.
That Sears is dead and gone now, I say good riddance.
People Break Down The Exact Moment They Realized They Were Being Manipulated By Someone They Trusted​​
Manipulation is designed to be stealthy. We hardly recognize it when it's happening to us because our abuser has forced it to appear under wraps.
But when we recognize it for what it really is, we really feel like we've been smacked across the face. There is no other descriptor for it. Usually we've trusted and loved those that manipulated us.
A Platitude Of Pleasing
<p>You never know where the next blowout is coming from. Any time something needs to be addressed, you might try to bring it up once, gently, if you're feeling brave. If you meet the slightest bit of resistance, or you don't feel like that fight in the first place, you just go "okay dear" instead. You find that you'll put the argument off until next time, and hope that whatever you thought to bring up won't have any consequences, because you'll be hearing about those, too. It sucks, and I'm glad you can speak about it in the past tense.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/TheGreatestAuk/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">TheGreatestAuk</a></p>Wrong Or Right Or Just Not Agreeing?
<p>When I started realizing that I was feeling like I was constantly walking on eggshells. I never knew which version of my friend I'd get when we saw each other, or when we hung out. I also just completely stopped disagreeing with them because I didn't want to hear them tell me how wrong I was if we didn't share the same viewpoint.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/WhatArcherWhat/" target="_blank">WhatArcherWhat</a></p>Being Used
<p>My best friend suddenly distanced herself from me. But every now and then she'd call and ask if I wanted to do something, and I was encouraged because I thought it meant that things were still good between us. It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that she only called when she wanted to do something that required a ride, since she didn't have a car. The only thing I can say in my defense is that I don't use people that way so I didn't recognize user behavior. You can bet I do now.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Goldeverywhere/" target="_blank">Goldeverywhere</a></p>Hiding The Receipts
<p>I was living with my former best friend and his gf at the time. When I asked for grocery receipts (I trusted him & his ex to buy groceries bc I didn't have a car at the time + our work schedules were different so I couldn't go with them) and they wouldn't provide any. The only reason I became suspicious was bc they started asking for a ridiculous amount of money for my half and the actual amount of food wasn't adding up. Up until that point they never asked for a crazy amount and I was content with our groceries, but I noticed they became extremely greedy. When I then asked to see a banking statement, they wouldn't even provide me with that either.</p><p>At that point I just realized they were finessing me out of extra money and I started buying my own food. I just bit my tongue bc we only had like 2 months left on the lease. They tried to gaslight me and make me seem like the bad guy any chance they had (almost the entire time I lived with them actually). Eventually, I grew apart from him once I moved away and the only reason he hit me back up was bc she cheated on him so he probably didn't have anyone else to turn to (go figure). We don't talk anymore.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/0MG1MW3T/" target="_blank">0MG1MW3T</a></p>Ah Yes, Good Old DARVO
<p>My mother and I have always had a rocky relationship. She's always encouraged me to tell her what's wrong, however, any time I would she'd immediately go "sorry I'm such a terrible mother, I give you everything you want and it's still not good enough! Why don't you just go live with someone you don't hate?" Keep in mind this happens over small things such as "mom, I'd appreciate it if you'd knock before coming into my room. You know how easily I startle and you barging into my room really upsets me"</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/paytonc0510/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">paytonc0510</a></p>How Do You Do This To Someone
<p>8 years into the relationship. As we're sitting down he explains to me that the "first couple years" we were together he only saw me as a place to crash and free rides, but he loved me NOW, and even though I accomplished all the goals HE set for ME so we could get married he said "I never really thought you could do it". Oh and also you got fat, but don't worry we can fix it! It was like a magic veil lifted and I finally saw who he really was. F**k you James.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/DoNotUseOnHumans/" target="_blank">DoNotUseOnHumans</a></p>Be My Friend And Not Theirs
<p>She always managed to make me do things I didn't really want to do but the last straw was when she decided I had to stop being friends with two mates of mine over something stupid that offended her. </p><p>Cut her off over that and she then proceeded to act derisively ("you'll come back"), then badmouthed me and then begged me to take her back. Ten years later I am still friends with those two guys and she's still out of my life.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/FatherTedHackett/" target="_blank">FatherTedHackett</a></p>Victim Time
<p>When literally every time me and my mom talked she played the victim.</p><p>I was trying to help her raise me, ask me about my grades and stuff. For her I just existed, she wasn't responsible at all.</p><p>I grew up watching her play the victim to others, and I was always on her side, cuz she's my mom you know. Also I never really understood what was going on.</p><p>I started getting older and older, and seeing sh*t after sh*t she did. I understood what she did to my father, to my step-dad, to my sister, to her friends.</p><p>Probably I'd be the next one who she would use and throw away.</p><p>I talked to her... and you know the result. The victim. Nothing it's her fault.</p><p>The last time we talked, I was expecting the victim card. When she started speaking, I already knew what was going to happen. I didn't even said a word, I just agreed with her, and the next day I moved out. I'm not wasting my time.</p><p>It was the last day before quarantine, I remember it as if it was yesterday. Friday night: saturday morning I was packing my stuff.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/NotFromHeel/" target="_blank">NotFromHeel</a></p>Sixteen Years Of Made Up Lies
<p>After 16 years of marriage I realized my now ex was manipulating me. I would work and take care of the house and if I asked him to do something like get a job or clean up he would stage a mental breakdown and make me feel bad for asking him for help. </p><p>He would play up a horrible childhood or PTSD from the military to make me feel like I need to take care of him. Then would play on his computer all day and smoke while I worked. </p><p>Found out that a lot of his horrible childhood stories were made up and that he never made it through basic training in the military. I am happily with someone now but still catch myself cringing when he does things like cook or clean thinking that he is going to yell at me for being lazy. Meanwhile he loves me and is just doing things to take care of me. I'm working on deprogramming myself.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/HolyCelestialCow/" target="_blank">HolyCelestialCow</a></p>Sometimes It's The Mother-In-Law
<p>Took me until after the engagement to realize that my cheating ex fiancee was trying to browbeat me into submission.</p><p>Anywho, I quickly recognized emotional blackmail and manipulation from my MIL after getting married to a different girl years later due to that experience. I called her out on it.</p><p>She... Doesn't like that. But since my wife and sister-in-law and brother-in-law also recognize it they've got my back.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/engineertr1gg/" target="_blank">engineertr1gg</a></p>Just as new mothers encounter the sudden, influential developments of powerful hormone changes, protective instincts, and milk production, so new fathers undergo some key changes of their own.
Their socks become exclusively white, climbing higher up the calf than ever before. All their shorts sprout cargo pockets and clunky belt loop cell phone holders. They start to really lean in to their old records.
Regional LawsÂ
<p>"Dad, driving past a cemetery: Did you know anyone living in a 3 mile radius of a cemetery isn't allowed to be buried there?"</p><p>"Me: No, I had no idea. How come?"</p><p>"Dad: Yeah, you're not allowed to bury the living"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk1d2k?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">TinyLuckDragon</a></p>For the Face Plant Image Â
<p>"Why do Scuba Divers fall backwards off a boat?"</p><p>"Because if they fell frontwards they'd still be on the boat" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjv4mt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">hatsnatcher23</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Just told this one to my bf and he still has his face in his hands" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjka0w7?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">sxeoompaloompa</a></p>A Mammal of Few WordsÂ
<p>"What did the father buffalo say when his child left for school?"</p><p>"Bison" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjp257?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">TatooineLight</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"LOL" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjp9p0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">BennuH</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Told this to my brother, he laughed his a** off." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk4cvq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Type10Civilization</a></p>Baggage
<p>"When I do home improvements I always use my step ladder"</p><p>"I never knew my real ladder" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjlkab?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">DavosLostFingers</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Whoever took the ladder, please return it or further steps will be taken." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjm2htz?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">WaldhornNate</a></p>Woah Woah Woah, We're in PublicÂ
<p>"Me: I'm not very hungry, I just want something easy"</p><p>"Server: maybe the chicken strips for $6"</p><p>"Me: maybe it does, but that doesn't help my hunger" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjuq78?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">mcnoobs_</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"My husband was facepalming for solid 8 minutes after I read that joke to him." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjnee7m?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Madanax</a></p>Not WrongÂ
<p>"Two dudes were on a boat with a few cigarettes, but they didn't have anything to light them, so they threw one of the cigarettes out of the boat, and the boat became a cigarette lighter." </p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjkeoz?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">OrangeMirrorJuice</a></p>Watch the News Before Saying This OneÂ
<p>"Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?"</p><p>"It's okay, they eventually woke up."</p><p>"I cringe every time." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk0ej7?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">unicorndreamz94</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"My 10 year old tried this one a few weeks ago. Unfortunately, I had just read news about a missing local girl. 'So I answered that yes I heard about the missing girl' Scared the sh** out of my 10 year old" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjo3ssv?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Aubear11885</a></p>Got a Million of Em
<p>"What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fshhhh."</p><p>"I'm sorry but I'm about to say something tasteless. Water."</p><p>"I got fired from my job at the calendar factory. I took a day off."</p><p>"Unfortunately though, I can't really tell these jokes since I'm not a dad. I'm a faux pa."</p><p> -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk9igl?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">WholeGrainMustard</a></p>G-Pa With the Physics HumorÂ
<p>"Why does the movie "speed" have no director?"</p><p>"If it had direction, it'd be called velocity!"</p><p>"-my grandpa, earlier today" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk4wdo?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ConceptUpset4681</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"That's better than a regular dad joke. It's a grand dad joke." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjkuc30?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">VaultBoy9</a></p>A Surprising Amount of Elevator HumorÂ
<p>"I have a joke about elevators."</p><p>"It works on so many levels......." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk1lrv?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">M0ntgomatron</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Did you hear about the corruption at the elevator company?"</p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"It went all the way to the top." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjkyjrp?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">RandomName222222222</a></p>Cleaning up is hard enough when it's just clearing a month of dust bunnies. Can you imagine cleaning the debris left by murder, suicide and violence? I have a really great friend who used to do crime scene clean-up for a living. The pay is incredible; it starts at $55 an hour. But there is a much higher cost in mental well being. Death affects you in ways you don't always feel immediately. My friend has stories of nightmares, depression and pain after leaving scenes of horror. Why make all that money just to spend it on therapy? It takes a certain type of person.
***TRIGGER WARNING. CONTENTS ARE SENSITIVE ***
Redditor u/MemegodDave wanted to hear from the people who have the stomach to come in after crime and tragedyto try to bring back some form of normalcy to the location by asking... People who make their living out of cleaning murder scenes, accidents and the like, what is the worst thing you have experienced in your career?
Wrapped Up
<p>Dad had to saran wrap a guy's intestines back into his body once.</p><p>Dude had surgery and pushed too hard on the toilet. Dude was fine, according to Dad, just holding himself together on the toilet while a group of firefighters tried to figure out why the hell they were sent instead of paramedics.</p><p><em>Update</em> When he pushed too hard he opened a scar on his torso/ab area and it all fell out onto his lap. Should have mentioned this when I wrote the post. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l48wk3/people_who_make_their_living_out_of_cleaning/gko9lq0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">noblemile</a><span></span></p>Flesh
<p>One that stuck with me was a suicide in a bathtub, we couldn't drain the tub, so had to use a coagulant then scoop up the bloody mess into biohazard bags. Same for the toilet. Another was a suicide by gun in a basement full of boxes which was a nightmare to clean as even the smallest bit of flesh had to be found and cleaned up. The smell of the smallest piece of flesh meant the job wasn't done until it was found. </p>Walk Away
<p>Medic here, first responder to a motorcycle collision. Guy who crashed was a friend. He'd been torn in half and almost decapitated.</p><p>Had to walk away from the scene and let my driver and another crew handle it. Think about it daily. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l48wk3/people_who_make_their_living_out_of_cleaning/gko4y58?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Sabre-23</a><span></span></p>All over the House
<p>I posted this on another thread so just copy and pasted it but this was one that I had to do</p><p>Clean up after a murder. It was a rehab house for ex cons, 4 bedroom house with communal bathroom and kitchen. Sunday morning and guy A is in his room listening to music pretty loud, guy B is in the kitchen cooking his breakfast, B knocks on A's door and tells him to turn it down, there's a small argument and B returns to his breakfast and A turns his music up. So B grabs the biggest knife in the kitchen, kicks in A's door and stabs him through his left shoulder, entering by his collar bone. </p>"ride-alongs"Â
<p>Not a cleaner, but my brother's best friend is a police officer and I heard all about this horrible experience:</p><p>My brother's friend took him on "ride-alongs," all the time. One day, they were responding to a welfare check. This guy's neighbor saw his apartment door cracked open for several days and called the police. They went to check it out and found a college student (18-19) who had shot himself. </p>Melt Away
<p>When I was a bartender, a couple of clients told me the worst part about the job is cleaning melted bodies.</p><p>I don't know the science behind that, but from what I understand is if a body stays for a while in a certain condition of temperature and humidity, it melts. And those guys have to remove that person's remains in buckets. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l48wk3/people_who_make_their_living_out_of_cleaning/gknsqfm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Kaynny</a><span></span></p>Audrey
<p>I had a great uncle who helped clean up the bodies left behind by hurricane Audrey in 1957 and he said that the smell persisted in his nose for weeks after. It got so bad that he went to the doctor to see if they could do anything and they clipped all of his nose hairs and the smell went away. It was explained to him that the smell had soaked into the hair but I don't claim to know the validity of that statement.</p>Hazard
<p>One of my first jobs after moving I did this, and the job that had me walking wasn't even a scene as described. We did all types of hazmat cleans and the worst was actually a couple went on vacation and came back to backed up sceptic. Think about 1 ft thick hard dried out crusty sceptic waste spread throughout the entire 1st floor of a house. Not going further into detail here. Was nasty.</p><p>Septic, not sceptic. On break and mobile, so yeah... </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l48wk3/people_who_make_their_living_out_of_cleaning/gknvzn8?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Kamenovski</a><span></span></p>After the Crash...
<p>Working for a tow truck driver that get the calls after crashes. The worst one for me was a family of 6 coming back with over 10 pizzas for a baseball team. It was a head on with a tractor trailer (18 wheeler). The ambulance took the bodies away of course, everyone died but one little guy. There was so much blood and vomit, diapers, toy dolls covered in blood, the pizza was everywhere inside of the car like 2" thick on everything and all over the road. </p>Fresh Meat
<p>Friend of mine does this.</p><p>His worst was an elderly woman who died in a bath. Skin falls off like long cooked meat. So he just saw piles of skin/flesh</p><p>God just writing this makes me gag. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l48wk3/people_who_make_their_living_out_of_cleaning/gknwqwu?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">PlagueDoc22</a><span></span></p>Image by freestocks-photos from Pixabay |
We all know the telltale signs that something is making us uncomfortable. Suddenly, we begin shaking, either in our hands or knees or toes. Then, usually, sweat starts pouring out of every part of our body, making it look like we just ran through a rainstorm underneath a waterfall. Finally, we lose our regular speech functions. Everything goes out of sync and our words don't match up to what's in our minds.
What's interesting is that what usually brings about these fits of uncomfortableness differs from person to person, as evidenced by the stories below.