Employees Reveal Their Deepest, Darkest Secrets From Their Jobs

Employees Reveal Their Deepest, Darkest Secrets From Their Jobs

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No matter what job you're working there is always going to be stories. Everyone from the garbageman to the accountant to the movie star has some secrets to spill. None of us walk away unscathed from the daily grind. And if we as consumers knew everything going on behind the scenes... we'd probably never leave the house.

Redditor _ItsMrQ wanted everyone to admit out loud, what is your deepest, darkest truths when it comes to work by asking... *What are your job confessions? _These are some beauties. Note that many people have their Reddit accountants mysteriously deleted after posting. Interesting. *

I'M HERE FOR YOU...

I also cut lightly on the back on your neck because I know it tickles and gives you goosebumps. I hate cutting your kids hair if he cries and moves around. I show you the back of your head with the other mirror even though I know if i messed it up or you don't like it you're too shy to say anything anyway. I remember people that don't tip. I remember people that do tip.

Now for the nice ones. Since its sounding like I'm an a**. Its okay if you don't make small talk. I focus on what I'm doing, so if you don't talk, its fine. I'll just treat you like one of the mannequins we used in school. Its also okay if you talk. If something bothers you, let me know. The blade is too hot? Tell me. Loose hair itchy? Tell me. Im there to make the experience enjoyable for you.

DEAR CUSTOMERS... KINDNESS PAYS OFF...

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i try to sneak more chips into the bag/more cheese on quesadillas/more meat onto any meal if someone is extra nice to me.

DIRTY WORDS...

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I'm an auctioneer, and I do the whole fast talking thing. Sometimes, if I get bored in an auction, I'll sneak in the word 'f**k' into my auction chant. I talk so fast that they don't actually know that I said the word, but it certainly gets their attention. Their eyes get all big, and they kind of look around to see if anyone else heard it. It's a pretty awesome way to amuse myself.

I KNEW I ALWAYS DESERVED AN "A"!!!!!

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I'm a teacher. I am always professional when it comes to grading and discipline. Every child is treated the same way. I also do not inflate grades or give "freebies".

However, if at the end of the grading period I notice that a student is 1 point away from moving up a letter grade (69%, 79%, 89%) I might just secretly throw a couple of extra points onto some old assignment. BUT not if you're an a**hole. If you were disrespectful to me or any of the other kids you're out of luck.

I guess it's my own classroom version of reddit's karma.

OH MY GOD ME TOO...

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As a designer, if I don't like you, I will use Comic Sans on your projects. On purpose.

LET'S PLAY MUSICAL CHAIRS...

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I worked at a bar and whenever a regular would get drunk I would move his drink down a few chairs when he went to the bathroom, it really threw them off.

HAVE YOU EATEN TODAY? I GOT YOU.

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Pizza delivery boy. I love it when you call to change your order. Guess who gets to eat the pizza/wings/breadsticks you changed your mind about.

HOLD PLEASE...

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As a pharmacy tech, I ignore customers when they're on their phones. Data entry is a big part of the job, so I focus on that until their conversation is done. Prescription drugs, from antibiotics to ADHD meds, are a big deal. They need to be taken seriously (pun intended).

I KNEW IT!

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When I worked retail and a horrible customer would tell me "go check the back", that was my cue to take a short break in the back room before going back out and saying we didn't have it. Without even looking.

NEXT WINDOW PLEASE...

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If you're a d**k to me at the speaker when I take your order your drink is getting more ice than average. Vice versa for nice people.

KEEP THE CHANGE!

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I'm a cashier. When an item rings up with an amount where I'd have to give the customer a lot of change, I normally round up to save myself and them the trouble.

If you're an a**hole? I punish you with change.

JUST HANG UP.

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I work IT over the phone. I work MUCH harder for nice and/or easy going people that call in. I'll make a much more honest effort to fix the problems of nice people. If you call and are a complete tool to me, I will send your stuff to someone else, and it will take a lot longer to get your computer fixed.

WE HERE YOU AND YOU ARE JUST STANK.

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I've been a lifeguard for many years. You're barely aware of us but we know everything about you.

You don't realize that we can hear all of your conversations. And we judge you for it. It's common for us to chat about how horrible of a parent you are or the details of your divorce.

TURN THE PAGE...

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I judge you on your reading material, and I'm more likely to waive fines if I like what you read.

THANKS FOR READING..

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As someone in an entry level position with an office, I cheat my computer screen in just slightly while I browse Reddit on company time, yet I lower my brow and put my hand on my chin so when people walk by they think I'm hard at work.

ALWAYS GET A SHOT OF ESPRESSO.

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i was a manager at Starbucks for 6 years. if you are ever a jerk to even one of the baristas, you might as well just try again at a new store because the chances are high that you will get decaf for life.

HONESTY AND KINDNESS GOES ALOOOONG WAY!

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I'm a nurse, and have the discretion to enforce as well as bend the rules regarding visiting hours. I know a serious illness is difficult on the patient's loved ones, but I won't hesitate to dismiss visitors who are disrespectful to the staff or impede my ability to provide care. If you are respectful and a source of positive energy, I will let you hang out as freely as possible within the privacy laws.

I would never do anything to purposefully harm a patient, but I do wonder about people who feel the need to be condescending a**hats to someone they know is about to stick them with a needle.

If you aren't happy with a health care facility's "policies," please don't take it out on the staff. We have no say in how things are staffed or run either. Put your complaint in writing and send it to the CEO/Grand Poobah Unit. If you get a followup survey, respond honestly -- they really stress over those numbers.

I NEED EXTRA EVERYTHING!

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When I worked at Chipotle, if you were cool I would give you a super-stuffed, bangin' good burrito and/or not charge you for guacamole. If you were a d**k you bet your butt you were getting charged for that guacamole and you're getting the minimum amount of Chipotle goodness inside your burrito.

Get your damn fingers out of my work station-I'm a burrito artISTE who needs her space!

Also, nice people got free chips, and I gave shirts out to people a few times. The managers weren't thrilled with me.

USE YOUR WORDS!!

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When I worked at Disneyland, if someone came up to my vending cart and didn't know what they wanted, I'd move onto the next person until they knew. This would sometimes eliminate my line. If I had no line, I'd go back to drawing.

When someone would say, "I want that one" I'd ask them which one. You'd be surprised to find out how many people don't use their words.

We had two ice cream sandwiches. When a guest gave me a vague answer I would ask them which one until they gave me the name of the ice cream sandwich. I forced them to talk damn it! California Screamin's line will not fill up any faster if you spend one second giving me the name of the ice cream _you _wanted.

I disliked that job for the guests.

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