New Years is a big celebration for many people. But sometimes the party can get out of hand.
Reddit user icameforthemusic asked:
"Doctors/Nurses/Police/EMT/Firefighters: what was the dumbest injury you saw this New Year's Eve?"
Here are the best of the worst.
CPR
Girl drinks too much and passes out. Drunk fiance decides that sleeping drunk girl has died and starts CPR. After each round of CPR drunk girl pushes fiance off her chest because CPR hurts. Fiance gets friend to hold down drunk girl's arms and continues CPR. Ambulance arrives, throws fiance off drunk girl and brings her to us complaining of a sore chest. silentgoldfish
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Diving
I work in the ER. Guy came in last night with two broken legs and various ruptured organs from blunt force trauma. Apparently his friends had set up one of those plastic blow-up pools in the backyard and his intoxicated mind had convinced itself that there was enough water to break a second-story jump. All he did was moan the whole time while he vomited up his liquor. Dynamaxion
Kebabs
Guy walks out of kebab-place in Oslo, slips on the ice, lands on his face, kebab still level, nothing spilled. Attempts to get up, but is too drunk to find balance, flips around 180 degrees, spraying his face with the contents of the pita. Proceeds to desperately roll around in meat and sauce. PC-Bjorn
Bouncer
I'm a bouncer and I've worked over 10 NYE events... the dumbest thing you see is a ton of intox... this year I had to assist a police officer who cut his forehead with his hat, I had to pull out a girl out the garbage bin because she fell in while she was puking, a chick falling down the escalators and walking it off like a boss (there's something messed up about hearing someone roll and smash their head on steel steps) bunmarda
Messy
The worst thing I've had to deal with was 2 NYE ago I was paged over to the female washroom to help a girl get her friend out of the stall because she was passed out... I opened up the door and as soon as the door swung open the girl who was sitting on the toilet puked all over her friend and shat herself while trying to get up, her friend looked at the puke and puked all over her friend... one of the female bouncers gave them a whole bunch of paper towel to clean up but when we called over a cab none of the cabbies wanted them because the state they where in... we ended up taking the girls to the back and hosed them down with a garden hose bunmarda
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Glassy
Sweet little College age girl got in altercation with boyfriend, got pushed back, tripped, broke and fell through a large first floor window. To paraphrase her, Instead of pissing and moaning about getting launched through a window she picked up the biggest shard of glass she could find and stabbed him in the face. They broke up later that night. AwesomeExpress
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Spoiler Alert
I'm an EMT and the dumbest I've seen yet was a guy who was dragged by a car. This guy had his wallet taken by people he knew so instead of calling the cops, he hung onto the spoiler of a car for over a mile. He kept most of his balance on his steel toed boots and actually left a huge groove in the pavement. FFEMT39
En Garde
Former Transporter. I was heading home one night when a guy drunk off his ass asked me for a wheelchair near the E.R. I got him one and he helped his friend get into it. The guy had a full-sized longsword with no hilt through his foot. He was laughing. They had wrapped a kitchen towel around his foot with duct tape.
This is a lesson on why not to use decorative swords and drink at the same time. ThorneLea
Explosive
I live in China and each year there are ridiculous injuries due to fireworks, such as a dude who blew his arm off by waving it over a box if industrial fireworks (which are available to consumers) while waiting for it to go off. Also, these fireworks will often tip over downtown, launching missiles under cars and into windows, making Beijing during Chinese new year a virtual war zone. The_Flabbergaster
Faceplant
LAST NYE we ran one person who had fallen. When we arrived the person was still on the ground but laying on his side, passed out drunk. The guy and his friends were walking home after drinking lots and lots of alcohol. So this guys is walking, passes out mid stride and face plants on the sidewalk/grass. Didn't put out his hands to break his fall or anything. He ended up getting a huge laceration on his forehead, broken nose. Luckily he didn't break any teeth, which all of us were pretty surprised about. eventhorizon07
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Tragic
Barely legal female riding an ATV in the dark, drunk, gets partially decapitated by a grounding wire. DRo_OpY
Flying Trees
Fire call: Arrive on scene with PD to a rager of a party. PD needed us for forcible entry, little did we know we'd need an attack line. Before we get up to the house, a fully involved Christmas tree comes flying out of the second story window. The cop nearly shits himself and "tactically recedes." A kid pops his head out of the window and yells something about more fire. Welp. We gear up and head inside, the engine crew en route. The only fire upstairs is from the bong. Some of the poor kids thought we were aliens in full gear, and me with a Halogen. We leave laughing, and tell the cops it's their problem now. mclen
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Burn Hazard
Last year we had a nasty dumb call. Some (very) drunk guys at some hedonistic party put the end of a sparkler you hold (in your hand) in their backsides and lit them. On one of the guys it either wasn't 'secure' enough or something and it ended up giving him second and third degree burns in the taint, inside buttocks, and testicles. It was pretty tough to call that in to the burn center on the radio and stay professional. wanderingkale
Smashed
We went to a couple fingers stuck in champagne bottles...I will explain one a little bit more though, a guy couldn't get his finger out so he went outside and tried to smash the bottle off his finger. When he did it the broken glass sliced up his finger and right into the bone. He never even tried any other way to get it off. [deleted]
Crashed
A group of teens went out for a joyride and the driver crashed his parents car. While the kids tried to flee, one of their friends was especially drunk (or high maybe both) and was passed out. They ended up pulling him out of the car and leaving him in a ditch. The parents of the kid that owned the car knew that the car was not "stolen" especially when their kids friend was found at the scene. menehan
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Redditor K2TsU- wanted to hear tales about the kid everybody knew in school, and maybe not for the best reasons.
They asked:
"What was the most disturbing thing the popular kid did?"
The popular kids in my schools were pretty chill.
I mean they were elitist and rude alcoholics, but not violent so there is that.
Pooper
"Freshman year in high school the jocks pooped in their hands and smeared it all over bathroom walls of the place we were staying, on a school trip. As well as a lot of other weird crap." ~ IskandarSingh
GiphyThe Shooter
"Popular kid lived in other friends house with other friend and his girlfriend. Popular kid was always careless and weird around guns. After the bar other friend and girlfriend were laying in bed and popular kid came in and shot other friend in the head. The girl involved was faithful to her boyfriend and never showed interest in popular kid but all involved had known each other most of their lives." ~ Brainlessthe2nd
Psycho
"Pinned a girl down, with help of her mates, and forcibly shaved her eyebrows off in the middle of lunch. Teachers went ballistic, obviously but the poor girl got sent to school as normal by her mum the following day.Thankfully one of the girls that’s great with make up did her brows for her everyday until they grew in."
"The final straw was stealing a freaking huge knife from food tech. It was never locked as the school was old af, and the doors were crappy. She had a fight planned after school with the new girl, she has issues with prior to her starting. Thankfully, the police were quietly called after most of my year group told the office asap. She was marched out of class, soon after." ~ charlottee963
Tissues
"Oh man, I’m just now being reminded of how this one very popular, good looking kid used to masturbate in class. He would wear very baggy sweat pants and use tissue that he threw away in the classroom. Everyone knew he was doing it and I’m sure he knew that we all knew."
"Come to think of it, why the heck didn’t I think this was more weird when I was a kid?? I mostly just remember thinking 'there goes Cohen, throwing away his 'stuff' rags again…' ~ UptownShenanigans
Fighter
"Nothing as crazy as the other ones here, but he got into a fight with a kid and ended up breaking the other kid’s ribs pretty bad. he got expelled and charged with assault." ~ Pi-s
GiphySee crazy shows signs early.
Start your people survival kit now.
Criminal
"Rubbed a peanut butter sandwich in the face of a girl that was allergic. Oh and threw a pen at someone's face and they ended up in the eye infirmary." ~ melonsmcgee93
GiphyBully
"A football player at my school bullied everyone. One kid tried to fight back but the bully beat him almost to death. That kid is now in a wheelchair and needs 24/7 care. He has severe brain damage and is unable to take care of himself. He lives in a nursing home. Has been there now almost 20 years. The kid that beat him got 1 month in juve and now is the fire captain for a big metropolitan area." ~ tayvia99
Poison
"Science teacher at my school used to keep fish in her class room. A girl in my year thought it would be hilarious to poison them by tipping acid into the tank. Thus killing all the fish. Kids are horrible, why would anyone want to be a teacher is beyond me." ~ oublieternel
Bunch of Heathens
"Got beaten up, dragged down the street until my trousers ripped off and my birthday presents stolen by a couple of bullies on lunch break. After going back to school to report the incident and get some clothes, I was in a toilet cubicle and heard the bullies come in and remove their earrings and start pushing them into their faces to make themselves bleed so they could blame me for starting a fight. Luckily I wasn’t the only person that overheard and they got suspended. I also got suspended for leaving premises without a lunch pass." ~ Jazzlike-Bee-6284
Foreshadowing
"One of the 'popular kids' in my 5th grade class crushed a poor turtle to death at recess. 10 years later, he was arrested for shooting and killing someone during a home invasion." ~ CozyLemonade
GiphyWhat in the world?
If I were a teen today, I'd homeschool.
What a hot mess.
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For those who are not feeling particularly bubbly at the moment, Redditor Chillay_90 asked:
"So, what ya'll mad about today?"
Being employed is a good thing.
That doesn't mean work conditions are always favorable.
A General Consensus
"Going to work."
– jebidiabooyaa
"I'm grateful to have a job just not always happy to go to it."
– jebidiabooyaa
Uncredited Employee
"Made an amazing job at work and everyone else that was higher up involved 'shoved' me aside and took credit. Now I'm the guy that worked 14 hours a day since mid December and all I got was being credited as some minor helper."
"To make matters worst I complained and my 'reward' was getting extra work and my boss saying 'in Old Rome when a gladiator killed a lion he wouldn't get a day off, he would have to kill another one the next day.'"
"I am seriously considering quitting today."
"EDIT 1: RIP my inbox, I seriously can't answer the literal hundreds of messages I am receiving right now. I thank you all for the support. I wrote in this just to vent some steam and found a lot of support here in a really bad moment. Also I am not considering posting the story again on another board mostly because I just want to move on and forget this happened altogether."
"EDIT 2: Talked to my GF and my parents and they were kinda shocked with this and asked me to quit as both see that this really took a toll on me. We will figure something out in the mean time and I have some solid savings for a rainy day, so I guess this is the time to put them to use. Also I talked to my direct supervisors this morning, as they had always been supportive and they say they will back me up in this process and try to make the next weeks as smooth as possible. One of them is apparently also considering quitting for similar reasons."
– _Didds_
Overworked/Underappreciated
"I'm a high school teacher. It's understood that we stay late on Wednesday for grade level meetings, content meetings, and professional development/training."
"I plan my life during the school year around that fact. Considering we're here until close to 6PM some Wednesdays, I make sure all afternoon/evening plans and commitments are never on a Wednesday."
"We came back yesterday and SURPRISE, we're going to be staying until 6PM on Mondays for additional meetings and training opportunities!"
"I have therapy on Mondays. BECAUSE of this job where I'm treated like sh*t from 3 different directions."
"This is my last semester at this school, so I just won't be attending. Fire me during a teacher shortage. I dare you."
– Ghost0fBanquo
Opinions matter.
So angry Redditors sounded off theirs.
Personality Clash
"My roommate’s ex wife is a narcissist. He’s got sole custody, and she still manages to cause problems. She’s the most infuriating person I’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting."
– Phoenix_of_Asclepius
Everything Comes At An Exorbitant Cost
"Life is too f'king expensive."
– sam_francisco814
"For $9.99 you can unlock my opinion."
– Ryddim
Master Of Your Fate
"The fact that my future depends on me."
– BBQPHOENIX
That Time Of The Month
"It's the first day of my period, I'm mad about everything."
– whiskey__throwaway
Redditors discuss how the wide range of emotions they're feeling fueled the fire.
Soiling Clothing
"I got diarrhea and lowkey shat my pants."
"Edit at 0:36 AM: My house almost exploded due to my sister's idiocy. To tell it quickly: We have old main heating furnace that can take everything and those has option to heat up water only or to make heaters warm. She put two shovels of coal because she didn't care to check the lever that controls it. Thank god that entire house did a roar of nightmarish beast that sounded like it's about to devour you. I almost shat my pants again."
– Alex152Pl
Chill Factor
"The windchill is -40..."
– A40
Persistent Pain
"The migraine I had yesterday is still here today."
– GrumpyWampa
Grieving
"My dog collapsed right before Christmas. One blood transfusion and tons of meds later, she's on the mend."
"Went for her follow up today. Left the vet with one less dog."
"It's nobody's fault. Autoimmune disorder, probably. And she's 11, which is old, but for mini-dachshunds she should have had a few more good years."
"I'm just mad my poor dog is gone and there's nothing anyone could do about it. I miss you, Chloe."
– americancrank
Priorities
"My new computer has been updating for two hours. I want to play Sims 4."
– drunkplantmom
Let's all collectively take a deep breath.
Now exhale...
If you feel a little bit better and more relaxed, then good on you.
And if you're still feeling irritable, frustrated, or still majorly peeved, I hear you, and I validate your distress.
But whatever it is that's ticking you off, it could always be worse, amirite? All we could do is just hope for a better tomorrow. Cheers.
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"What is culturally accepted today that will be horrifying in 100 years?"
Medical advances have been impressive as of late.
Imagine the possibilities in the future and how the present will be reflected back upon.
The Treatment Option
"I’m a physician and I have this weird feeling like chemotherapy is going to be looked at as completely barbaric in 100 years. No better option now but my God it’s horrific in principle and in person."
– liketosaysalsa
The Effects Of Chemo
"Immunotherapy seems to be one of the more promising options right now."
"The problem with chemo is that it relies on a simple premise: cancer cells die rather more easily than regular cells. So if we poison the patient, hopefully we can kill off the cancer cells before we kill off the patient. (Incredibly simplified layperson's understanding!)."
"That's why the side effects are so nasty - any chemical that can kill off cells indiscriminately is going to have side effects."
– jimicus
How Far We've Come
"Yeah, like how a few hundred years ago surgical procedures were done without anesthetics and patients were just strapped down so they couldn't thrash around so much. It's horrifying, but at the time the people didn't have another option."
– captaindeadpl
More Poison
"I mean if you told me a few years ago a doctor would tell me I was going to be intentionally given arsenic for several months, I'd have laughed."
– PingEVE
A Bountiful Harvest
"Organ transplant lists. Eventually we will grow the organs in a lab."
– AndHereWeAre_
Public works and services are due for major upgrades.
Commute Nightmares
"High levels of traffic injuries and fatalities."
– zipzap21
Future Convo
"You can just hear the conversation."
"So Grandpa, how did you get around before automated cars?"
"We just, drove them ourselves!"
"Oh, was that safe?"
"Oh, no, millions of people died."
– pueblogreenchile
Reduce, Reuse, & Recycle-
"Waste. So much waste of food, of water, of materials. If we are to make it to space, we’re going to have to get to a point where as much stuff as possible is reclaimed, and it’s gonna start looking real insane to throw out things that could be put through a reclamation service."
– kharmatika
Environment-Unfriendly
"Plastic everywhere."
– TheRealOgMark
"Especially the single use kind. Plastic products existing aren't necessarily a bad thing, but mass producing that will take lifetimes to biodegrade and is expected to be thrown away is one of the most environmentally selfish things we do to our planet."
– rumblemumble46
If it's already not considered ghastly, the things we put in our bodies will be viewed as abominable, years from now.
Maybe.
So Sweet
"The high prevalence of sugar in our diets."
– zipzap21
The Savory
"And SALT, holy crap! After finding out I have a heart problem and needing to cut out as much sodium as possible I've found that it's nearly impossible to find low sodium versions of nearly everything I like to eat."
– CatLadyGrip
I sincerely hope breakthrough medical advances will come at a more rapid pace.
As several Redditors pointed out earlier in the thread, chemotherapy is one of few options that patients who are fighting cancer have.
And based on real-life testimonies, it sounds like a necessary, but absolutely horrific, last resort.
Cancer has overstayed its welcome. Hopefully, we won't have to wait 100 years until we can live in a world without it.
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Redditor seilseil wanted to discuss all the items that may cost a lot, but the price makes sense.
They asked:
"What's expensive and worth every penny?"
Adele tickets.
The last row in the arena is NOT the same as the front.
So yes, I'll pay for the Queen.
Quality.
Good Sitting
"A nice desk chair." ~ Ulzaf
"I bought my own for work. My spine thanks me." ~ Bloobeard2018
GiphyTeeth
"Regular dental care. I didn’t & now I face $10,000 to repair the damage." ~ Aunt-jobiska
"On vacation in Thailand right now. Spent $400 for what my US dentist wanted thousands to do. And I’ve been treated with such kindness and respect. Hospitals are great and reasonable too. I’ve had to use their services a couple times in my travels, currently going thru rabies regimen. Avoid cats you’re not familiar with." ~ MdnightRmblr
Sharp
"If you cook, a high quality chef knife." ~ NearPeerAdversary
"There is a point of diminishing returns above 100$ per knife. They get better the more you spend, but no that much better. I have had a few cheap knives and a few really expensive knives. IMO the Victorianox knives are the best value, you can get better but it will cost you." ~ BlackSuN42
Buy Cheap
"Proper tools." ~ mf_dcap
"Mythbusters said it best. The first time you buy a tool, but a cheap one. Sometimes the cheap ones work great and last forever. If you use the cheap one and it doesn't hold up, then buy the expensive one, because then you know how much you need it.
Edit: I had I kind of wrong. 'Buy cheap tools until you know what you really need from that tool, then buy the best version you can afford.' -Adam Savage." ~ blanchov
Staff
"Good employees." ~ IntegratedSSR
"My old boss said, I don’t think it’s his saying, but it was something like 'I'd rather spend money training you to be the best even if you leave, than not train you and you stay.'" ~ OhIamNotADoctor
GiphyAre you listening employers?
Pay people what they're worth and they'll show up for you!
Action!
"A front and rear dash cam for your car. Expensive is subjective." ~ Master_Tao
"Yes. I was recently in a car accident. Dude lost control and slid into me head on, thankfully everyone was ok. None of the CCTV cameras picked up the wreck."
"He went in and said I was the one that hit him. It’s been a two month long battle even though every ounce of evidence points to him. The main reason it’s still going on? No video evidence. I’ve already got a dash cam installed on my other vehicle." ~ I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Lift Easy
"Movers. Especially if you’re moving out of or into a place with stairs!" ~ NotMilquetoast
"I wish my family knew this. I’ve moved both sets of grandparents 4 times total and my parents 2. They own lots of antiques and heavy furniture. Growing up they told me why pay for movers when I have you and your brother?" ~ ElPuertoRican15
Feet Kindness
"Good shoes." ~ AcceptableSized*enis
"I’m a woman and even forgetting heels, a good pair of sneakers is really worth the money. I have plantar fasciitis and have to get specific shoes that could cost up to $200/pair sometimes. The relief I feel with those after continuously wearing regular $40 sneakers is definitely worth it!" ~ itchy-n0b0dy
Connection
"Don’t cheap out on anything that connects you to the ground, it’s literally supporting you. Beds, tires, chairs, and shoes." ~ gramathy
GiphyThat last one... yes, YES... YES!!!
Restful sleep, happy feet.
They make life worth living.
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