Being an educator is one of the world's most arduous professions. Kids are a hand full, and parents can drive you to the vodka. It's stressful enough trying to just impart wisdom, imagine having to call home to tattle on the kids for the most outrageous issues. Teachers insurance should definitely cover mental health care.
Redditor u/Tee_01 wanted to hear from educators about the times they had to call home by wondering.... Teachers of Reddit, what is the most embarrassing reason you called a child's parents for?
Can I Get a Witness?
Last year, I had a 7th grader who went to the bathroom every day for about 10-15 minutes. I talked to her other teachers, she also went for 10 minutes in their classes every day. She was also late every day. Often by 10-15 min.
She always claimed she had IBS/Chrons. It came to a head when one day she claimed "my stomach hurts and I'm about to crap myself. I just have to take a poop." In front of the whole class. So I called her parents, the school nurse, and the school psych for a meeting. The girl had no medical issues. She just liked to cut class and get attention.
Near the end of the year, that same 12 year old girl asked me, "Mr. IAmTheDamnDoctor, are you single? because my sister be tryin' to talk to that right now."
I had to call another conference and basically ban her and all her friends from ever being in my room without at least a dozen other students/adults as witnesses.
That was not a fun class. IAmTheDamnDoctor
One of the first graders was so constipated he was screaming and crying uncontrollably, pacing with his pants around his ankles in the bathroom. It started almost immediately after drop off, so we called the mother maybe 15 minutes after she left. She did not pick up or return any calls until 5 hours later, because she was "lol, shopping." generichumancontent
My dad used to get bullied a lot as a kid and he always told me that if i get bullied i have to fight back hard cause that isn't gonna stop any other way. Luckily i live in a country where fighting back is actually an option and you wont get punished or expelled for it like in the US. Reddit
My very first year, of course... and they called ME.
I had a sophomore who was basically trouble from the start. In my class he was making a presentation, and he decided to say "crap" several times (not after making mistakes--it was intentional). So, I docked him for the word usage, and he blew up--I told him it was the same as if he'd used it in a written essay. So.....
The next day, I get a phone call from his mother--and I knew something was wrong, because everyone in the office was looking at me, and grinning. I introduced myself, and she asked why her son's grade had been docked. After I explained why, she responded, in a pleasant, "concerned mom" voice: "Well, I don't think 'crap' is that bad a word... it wasn't like he said 'the F words' or..." and she went on and on offering choice examples and combinations, as the blood drained from my face.
When the phone call was over, EVERYONE in the office started laughing--seems she was the local "insane mom", and these phone calls were common with her. gremashlo
Not a teacher but someone was caught watching pornography on his school computer and his parents had to come pick him up. After he came back he told us what happened and what his parents did as a punishment and he told us that they just laughed at him because nothing is more embarrassing than that. Boi420-69x
My teacher had to call and apologize to my mom after she told me she wouldn't let me go to the nurse because I was always asking. So I threw up on her desk in front of the whole class. melli72
power move... Reddit
My parents were called when I was in 8th grade because I would only talk in 3rd person. It went on for like, 5 weeks. AntarcticanJam
"Terry loves talking about terry in the third person!" flamaniax
The Best 'Actually, You're Speaking To The Boss' Experience | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Use Words Carefully.
My wife was about 30 seconds away from calling not just the kids parents, but also child welfare because she thought a kid wanted to be the "park w***e" when they grew up.
Turns out they wanted to do Parkour. billbapapa
Reminds me of when I was a kid. Someone called someone a "lady of the night" in class and I thought that sounded SO cool- like an assassin or a spy or a superhero!! So I very excitedly said I wanted to be a lady of the night!!
Could nooot understand why all the other kids were laughing at me. warpstrikes
I had to explain to a parent that although family guy is a cartoon, it was not appropriate for an 11 year old. He was quoting the pervy old character to other kids in his art lesson and creeping them out. lalatconpenny
I had to tell my mom that family guy is not appropriate for my then 9 and 11 year old daughters to watch when they're at her house. She didn't realize what it was and assumed it was fine because it's a cartoon. I only found out about it because my 9 year old quoted something from it one day. They'd been watching it for months at that point. 🤦♀️ Talyra_SC
A kid, 5th grader, peed himself in class and left a puddle under his chair. he was was to into the movie we were watching and he didn't want to ask to use the restroom. rohttn13
Went to elementary school with a kid who peed under his desk at least once a year. He also would stuff all his snotty / bloody tissues into his desk and refuse to take them out. When the teachers would eventually put on gloves and do it for him he had to be restrained, and would scream and cry for the rest of the day. JudgeGusBus
Obligatory not a teacher, but I once had my preschool or kindergarten (all I know is I was young) call my parents because I got my head stuck in a hole while playing on the playground structures. I don't recall how they got me out, but I do know that I haven't changed.
Not even a week ago, I got stuck on a kiddie ride in a mall and ended up with huge bruises on my legs. My impulses are still difficult to control. angelofchaos9800
It wasn't embarrassing, it was funny, but in response to the question "What comes in pairs?" Her son, with total sincerity and enthusiasm said, "testicles!" I emailed to let them know he was a little upset that I didn't write down his suggestion on the board. His mom said she printed the email and planned to pull it out again on some thanksgiving to read aloud when he was a teenager. AlvinTacoAlvinTaco
I had to call a single dad to inform him that his six-year-old son perfectly described an explicit porn scene to his friends. This was before internet porn so the kid must have found Daddy's special movies. good_sandlapper
HE DID NOT DO A GOOD JOB.
I had to explain to a 6 year old's parents that I wouldn't be wiping his butt for him. They seemed surprised that a 6 year old would have to wipe his own.
Edit 1: Here's some more context: We had bathrooms attached to the classroom so you didn't have to go very far. When he did this the first time he calls out "I'm ready!!!". I had an E.A who went and investigated, then came back and very sheepishly explained the situation. I told him through the door to just do the best job he could, and to wash his hands a lot. HE DID NOT DO A GOOD JOB. So i ran and found an administrator who took it from there. We had the meeting with his parents that afternoon. The family were recent immigrants from india so i wanted to be sensitive to cultural differences but so far every person from the sub continent gives me the same WTF?! response when i tell them this story. OneHatOnly
"Hi is that Armin's mum? Great. Ummm... could you please teach him not to respond with "HECK YEAH!" when I hand him a toy? Okay but... look... I didn't say it wasn't funny..."
I was teaching English at a Vietnamese kindergarten. Miss_Cegenation
Youth wasted on the Young....Giphy
This happened to a colleague when I worked in elementary school. A kindergartener had asked at the beginning of gym class to go to the bathroom. He intentionally didn't wipe himself.
When he came back to the gym, he backed up so that his butt was right in line with another kid's face who was sitting crisscross applesauce on the floor, dropped his pants, and put his crappy butt on that poor kid's face.
My colleague had to escort them both to the office and call in a district interpreter to call the unfortunate child's parents and tell them that their son might have hepatitis. SailorVenus23
The kid was like 15.
Actually had a parent call me and apologize.
Threw a kid out of class for licking highlighters. Gave him a warning, took the highlighters away, somehow he got another one and did it again.
Told him to go to detention. He protested, but eventually went.
Got a call that night on my personal phone (I have no idea how mom got my number), the mom profusely apologizing and straight up admitting that her son was being an idiot. Then she put him on the phone and made him apologize too. It was really hard not to laugh, because you could tell this kid had been getting reamed out by his parents over the incident and was not interested in talking to me.
The kid was like 15.
Teaching was a fun time in my life. Not sure if I'll go back but it sure was an adventure. Petrol_in_my_eyes
High school Deaf SPED teacher here. My student had contracted a bad stomach virus in his freshman year. He started off the day perfectly fine, had no symptoms and it suddenly hits him. He suddenly asked if he could go to the bathroom and I could see on his face that something was wrong, so I let him go. He came back almost 30 minutes later in tears because he'd lost complete control of his bowels on the way to the bathroom... in front of an entire lunch crowd. Thankfully his dad was less than ten minutes away to help with a clean change of clothes, I happen to keep baby wipes in stock and gave him a full pack to clean himself in a teachers bathroom (where I brought him when he'd finally come back so he'd have privacy to clean himself with dad's help).
It was awful and I felt so bad for him. defguysezhuh
Just today I had to phone parents because their child refuses to use the toilet at school and TODAY, during recess, this kid pulled his snow pants down and proceeded to take the fattest poop on the snow covered playground. I'll never forget today. Grizzmo1
"Ms. Megan, what the heck?"Giphy
I'll never forget when my kids preschool teacher texted me to tell me that he had said a bad word in class.
Thankfully, she was more entertained than mad.
Apparently, she had put the children's lunchboxes in a different spot than usual. My then 3yo went to grab his lunchbox from his cubby and when it wasn't there he went to his teacher and said "Ms. Megan, what the heck?" purpleghostdance
In movies and TV, a character who is portrayed as highly intellectual has visible signifiers.
In real life, however, a person with a high IQ is not as easily identified by common Hollywood stereotypes of smart people.
"What is a subtle sign that someone is really intelligent?"
The minds of really smart individuals never stop working.
"They draw wisdom from multiple sources. Wait but that might be more wise than intelligent... But I guess those two tend to be seen together a lot."
"They are curious about everything."
"To be intelligent you need to be knowledgeable and you cant be knowledgeable if you are never curious."
The way highly intelligent people interact with others is slightly different.
"They can switch up the way they talk to match the person they're talking to without sounding condescending. They listen to how others learn and explain it in that person's language of understanding."
Talking On Level Ground
"Talking to people as if they're intelligent at their level and without being condescending or even letting on that it's lower than their level."
"I used to work with a doctor - Tom Howard - and the day I realized he was a genius was the time he guessed every single condition a patient of mine had based on minute pieces of information about him."
The Humble Professor
"No joke. The smartest professor I had in engineering school was also the most humble. She was an astounding human being. By week 2, she knew everyone's names by heart in the intro engineering course. In College. With like 180 students. Later, in upper division classes, people would occasionally ask some really stupid questions."
"Like, it happens... you get so deep into some fluid mechanics derivation or something you forget something really basic. People would ask a question like this and everyone would be thinking like; 'Wow, how did you even make it this far?' but then... it's like she would spot the flaw in their understanding so perfectly, and then respond with such clarity and wisdom that the person asking the question would look less stupid and the whole class would be enlightened."
"And here's the thing... I pride myself on being really good at that exact skill. I tutored a lot of people. I was easily one of the brightest amongst my peers. But that woman was on another level. It was mind-blowing."
"And it wasn't just her intelligence, but her organizational skills, discipline, consistency.... And yet... she was so humble. She was quiet and physically quite small. But she just exuded competence and immediately commanded every room she walked into. I've never seen anything quite like it."
A Positive Effect
"When they explain something they make you feel intelligent."
When In Doubt
"They know when their knowledge ends and say something to the extent of 'I don't know and anything else i say on this topic is ignorant speculation.'"
Some with impressive IQs may deal with questions in the following ways.
Reaction To Delayed Responses
"'You really think about everything don't you?' - a doctor, to me, after he asked me a question and I took longer than 2 seconds to answer it."
"No, I just pull something out of my ass every time and those extra seconds you waited for me to answer were purely to irritate you for my own enjoyment."
The Really Good Questions
"They can ask really good questions."
"Edit: to anyone not understanding what mean, I’m talking about people who ask 'really good questions,' not just any questions, really good ones. I don’t know how one would achieve this skill(I know I haven’t)."
"They spend time thinking before asking a question."
"Some of the smartest people don’t comment at all."
I agree with many of the comments saying a really intelligent person knows how to cater the conversation towards another person's level of understanding.
They do have the impressive skill to convey something in a way that can easily be understood. Some of the most venerated professors at my university were like this, and their classes were always the hardest to get in to.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
There are roughly 7 billion people on earth so being the top 1% of anything sounds like it might be an incredible honor.
Maybe you've received an award or a certification that only a few people have gotten. Or maybe you have a rare disease, which doesn't sound as fun.
We went to Ask Reddit to find the people who are in a top 1% of people.
Redditor I_Love_Small_Breasts asked:
"What are you in the 1% of?"
Here's some of the rare groups people are apart of or things they experience.
Could be totally great or totally inconvenient.
"If I shake my head in a certain way, I can give myself an orgasm. Never met anyone who can do that."
"Wow that sounds incredibly inconvenient."
"'Shaking my head' has a whole new meaning now. Damn."
Survived a flesh eating bacteria.
"Survived flesh eating bacteria in the bloodstream after sepsis. Most people die within 3 days."
"Had MRSA and sepsis because of an open wound on my left foot. Thing is a nurse was treating the wound with Santyl and it was fully bandaged at all times. The nurse changed the dressings 3 times a week but I still ended up in the hospital with antibiotics IV'd into each arm plus oral antibiotics. Spent 15 days in ICU having all my organs sonogramed for signs of the infection spreading. X-rays and MRI's to check for bone infections and when they released me I had to wear a wound vac pump for 2 months to seal the wound on my foot."
"I can stop my hiccups on command."
"There’s a superpower for sure."
This is way less than 1%
"I am one of only 1300 board certified Sexual Assault Nurse Examiners for the adult and adolescent population. In the world."
"I'm unsettled by how small that number is."
"To be fair, there are more SANE nurses, meaning nurses who take care of these patients and are qualified to do so. Being board certified just means I took an extra step after I reached a qualifying time to take a test to prove it. I’m actually up for renewal. At the time I first tested, I was one of something like 1100."
"Still, even knowing that, there aren’t enough SANEs or FNEs overall."
"I’m naturally ambidextrous. Apparently that’s something only 1% of people naturally are. I can use both right and left hands ably for any task. For example, I often switch which hand I write with based on how I’m sitting."
"It’s worth noting natural ambidexterity is not the same as learned or acquired ambidexterity. For example, left handed people often have to use things designed for right handed people but otherwise are left handed."
"I’m of the .002% of people with osteopoikilosis. This freaked the sh*t out of me because when I was diagnosed the first thing the doctor said was 'wow I’ve never seen this in anything but textbooks before.'"
"Basically, I have bones growing inside my bones. It’s not anything I should be worried about, at least for a while, so that’s nice."
How many people can say this?
"I've represented my country in the Paralympic games."
"That’s a really nice one! Which specialty?"
"Volleyball for Great Britain in the 1996 games in Atlanta."
"Not me but my dad."
"He was born with a backwards heart and didn’t find out till his heart attack a few years ago and it actually saved his life."
"His doctor later told him that after being a doctor for over 30 years he’d never seen someone with a backwards heart and that apparently 1% of people on the planet have it."
"I am diagnosed with Visual snow syndrome. Basically seeing through static. It may not be rare as thought but I am one of very few people to be formally diagnosed."
"Same! I figured it out when people didn’t see the static and I heard it mentioned! Used to think I was seeing molecules when I was a little kid haha."
HIV resistant gene mutation.
"I have a double gene mutation that makes me highly resistant or even immune to the HIV virus."
"Can doctors use your blood to help those with HIV?"
"I have the same mutation and I've donated samples towards research. I got an email last year about vaccine hopes but I'm not sure where it went."
There are some incredible people out there in the world, and thankfully the internet is bringing them all together.
It's fascinating to see how diverse humans really are.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
How you approach life's many trials and tribulations can say a lot about who you are. However, many of us don't necessarily learn some lessons so easily.
Life is complicated. It's messy. Few, if any things, go according to plan. On top of that, sometimes the way we handle our relationships or our obligations might not be the most healthy one.
You live, you learn... or so the saying goes.
People shared their stories after Redditor ryanblumenow asked the online community,
"What did you learn at great personal cost?"
"I broke three..."
"Never trust a ladder set up by someone else. I broke three of my lumbar vertebrae. Thankfully I recovered fully, but damn was that scary. I also bit through my lower lip. I have a nice scar as a memento."
This is terrifying. Glad you're still alive–that you healed is miraculous!
"Even if you work your hardest..."
"Even if you work your hardest, do everything right, and are a great employee… you may still be seen as expendable."
This is true. Your company will never be loyal to you. Don't bend over backwards. Do your job–don't sell your soul.
"That you need to be careful..."
"That you need to be careful what you put up with as it teaches people how to treat you. I lost a lot of 'friends' once I started to set boundaries."
This is very true. I can relate: I definitely lost a few so-called "friends" the second I began standing up for myself.
"This goes for all relationships..."
"Don't listen to what people say, but what they do. This goes for all relationships, both professional and personal."
Amen to that. It's a cliche, but actions absolutely do speak louder than words.
"Family can be just as toxic..."
"Family can be just as toxic for you as anyone else. Sometimes it's best to cut them out."
Ain't that the truth.
Are we trading toxic family stories now?
"If someone gets upset..."
"If someone gets upset at you for trying to establish boundaries with them, it's not you being mean or unreasonable, it's them not caring about your happiness."
This is spot on. Don't trust people who violate your boundaries. Your gut won't lie to you, not about this.
"You can't convince them."
"You cannot, even subtly, force someone to love you. You can't convince them. They either do or they don't, and it's on you to decide what to do with that unchangeable position in mind."
I feel like many people go through their 20s without learning this.
Not that I know anything about this... or anything like that.
"Just because you try to be a good friend..."
"That people aren't always your friend. Gaslighting is real. Just because you try to be a good person doesn't mean good things will happen to you."
Very true. Be very careful about what you put out there. Not everyone has good intentions, though this is not in anyway meant to imply that the world is terrible.
It isn't. Just be judicious.
"You can accomplish..."
"You can accomplish anything you set your mind to. Doesn't mean you should. Everything will cost more than you anticipate in ways you can't imagine."
That's a poetic way to put it! Spot on. Everything costs something, even your success.
"That you don't have to run off and get married. A marriage that only lasted one year cost me more than $10K. Life is not a race and you don't need to be married by a certain point or at all for that matter."
"Be patient, make yourself available, gravitate to those who understand you the most."
Awful. It sounds like you have peace of mind now, however, which is priceless.
Don't be so hard on yourself, by the way. We all learn at our own pace.
Here's a tip before we go: Your education is never complete. Life always something to teach you, so just accept it, be open to it, and go in grace.
Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
Is there anyone who loved high school?
High school is a disaster. That is true for like... 95% of us.
it's like being branded. "I survived high school because of this!!"
The past is never really past, is it? What did you see?
Redditor HelloProxima wanted to go back and visit the teenage years, by asking:
"What is the most f**ked up thing that happened in your high school?"
I'm on the fence about high school. I want to hate it, but nostalgia haunts me. I saw a lot of violence, there is that.
We were on CNN.don lemon nodding GIF by Red Table TalkGiphy
"They started charging us for ketchup in the cafeteria. Most of the school boycotted cafeteria lunch and brought all manner of condiments from home. We were on CNN. They eventually caved." ~ Ash3Monti
No one liked him.
"I was big into drama club and musical theatre when I was in high school. There was a girl in the drama club in her freshmen or sophomore year who was super nice and everyone loved her. Her older brother on the the other hand, was a complete and total douchebag. No one liked him."
"He always made inappropriate comments or jokes and no one liked to be around him. One night, he was driving him and his sister back from school when he took a steep curve going around 100 mph. He lost control and hit a telephone pole. His sister died instantly and he was in a coma for a few weeks but ultimately survived."
"Myself and my friends in the drama club were devastated. She was one of the sweetest girls you'll ever met and we all loved her. A year or two later, the brother messages my sister and tries to use his sister's death as leverage to get laid. F**k you, you piece of crap." ~ FearTheKeflex
"Guidance counselor was taking bribes to change grades (Both money and sexual favors). Invited one male student over to his house. Had the student tie him up and hang him by chains in his basement "dungeon." Student was homophobic and while the counselor was tied up, bludgeoned him to death." ~ monthos
"This is not that extreme, but it's still disgusting. We have drinking water taps instead of fountains. One parent was suspicious of whether they were cleaning the tanks or not. So they made an announcement that the tank was being cleaned every single day."
"A lot of us didn't believe it, so a group of boys decided to see for themselves if it was true or not. So they put a dead frog in the tank when there was no one around. I don't even know where they found the frog but they swear they didn't kill it. Anyway the frog was there for a few weeks. And obviously the water started tasting weird."
"After the teachers got multiple complaints, they opened the tank and found the frog. The boys were punished, but they fired back with the fact that they lied about cleaning the tanks. They were still punished, because they proved it in a disgusting way. They could've put literally anything in the tank, but they chose a dead frog." ~ R00mTemperature
The QuadAcds2 Look Away GIF by Anime Crimes DivisionGiphy
"A worker doing stuff on the roof. He fell off. Landed in the 'quad' at lunch. A large piece of machinery fell and squished his head. Like a cartoon, only funny. Like 150 Kids saw this." ~ LordInventus
"The Latin kings gang threatened my cousin and his friends and they had 10 squad cars guarding the whole school and dismissed us the same day early." ~ Terrykrinkle
“it’s gonna blow”
"I had just moved in from Egypt to the states in my senior year of high school. A teacher thought it would be funny to fold a bunch of papers and wrap them in duck tape to make it look like a bomb and threw it my direction and went under his desk saying 'it’s gonna blow.' Everybody started laughing and I was so clueless then I just laughed along. It infuriates me to this day that I didn’t call him out on it or report him." ~ ezzabousaif
"Someone somehow made a bomb threat on a Swedish fish candy. Like one single piece. I don’t know how it happened but he got arrested." ~ ts_13_
"A couple weeks before graduation, this kid hacked into the school system and put a Hitler quote and a Boston bomber reference in the senior quotes for the yearbook. One of the affected parties was a trans girl, and we're still not sure if it was a targeted act because of that."
"Administration didn't find out until the entire senior class had received their books. Some people turned theirs in to get their pages replaced, but some kept it because it was a 'limited edition item' or some stupid sh*t like that. Kid got arrested and charged with cybercrime, since he hacked everyone in our school system's school passwords."
"He was so close to graduating too, but got expelled like two weeks before he could. Looked like a rat too. It was all over the news, and everyone in the state of CT basically knows about this now. Got out on bail for $5000." ~ kocorpsie
Good God!Season 3 What GIF by On My BlockGiphy
"We had a huge fight happen in the girls bathroom."
"Apparently one student brought drugs to school and was selling it to her friends. A completely unrelated student caught on and stole the drugs while everyone else was in class. She was caught snorting the drugs in the bathroom by the group selling the drugs and got the crap beat out of her."
"We also had a recently graduated student murder his parents for insurance money . He hid the bodies in a chicken coop and told everybody they were on vacation. It wasn't until 7 months later the bodies were found by the landlord because the rent was late." ~ randomgenericcow
Enjoy high school, at least try too. Maybe if more kids do that, it wouldn't be so insane.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.