Most teachers try their best but some seem like they gave up long ago. Dangerous chemistry classes, climate change denial, and treating students poorly isn't how school is supposed to go.
WhOverlord_Staxhar asked teenagers of Reddit: Have you ever had a teacher so dumb you questioned how they got the job as a teacher?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
15. Mad scientist teacher?
I had an older chemistry teacher in high school, probably about 50-60 that was just about oblivious to everything around him. Aside from just being totally disorganized in the order he taught things, so most of his lectures made no sense as we didn't have context as to what came before, here's just a general list of his escapades:
-Kids would be lighting up metal tongs on the Bunsen burners and fight each other with them, one kid got a nipple flap in his shirt, that was pretty funny
-one kid would dump all the chemicals he got a hold of in a beaker in the far corner of the class room after each experiment
-He was so inept at teaching that once on a test that he never really taught material for, was caught handing out random grades to all the students often did homework the same way, as some kids didn't even turn theirs in and would get A's and B's
I'm sure I'm missing some stuff but that's the brunt of it. Not sure what happened to him as that was my last class my senior year.
14. Well that's not how it works at all.
My history teacher told a class of future engineers that airplanes were only able to fly because they were built in a cross shape. You can imagine the laughter that ensued when they realized she was not joking.
My favorite quote from the first course of "aerodynamics":
"In this class you will learn how the air reacts against the different forms of wings, hull and general vehicle shapes. We will treat anything between biplanes and jumbo-jets. We will however not treat the helicopter, for all intents and purposes that's just witchcraft."
13. We've been doing it wrong, guys.
Yes, some professors too.
Most memorable was my sex ed in Eastern Europe not so long after CCCP fell. According to my teacher, you climax because of temperature, thus rubbing your peepee makes you climax. Even as a kids we realized it's bullsh*t. Orgasm is a myth and sex is a sin anyway.
Allegedly, I've got good education by world's standards. If that is true, I'm afraid to know how low the bar is set.
My sex ed teacher said that if we had sex before we turned 18, we would die :)
12. Crazy math lady.
Holy f*ck I've needed this outlet. I had a teacher for my freshman year of high school. Now I know every student hates a teacher, but this was different. She was a math teacher, who accused everybody of cheating. I was in an honors class with my best friend and we were comparing answers on a packet that she graded and passed back. Me and him had similar answers, but different grades? On, for example, question 5. We would both answer A. Except he got it right. And I didn't. We asked her why and she just started screaming at us accusing us of cheating, even though the paper was already passed back.
This is only one instance. She took students papers away and trashed them for no reason time over time, and she seemed to target my friend. My friend had all A's, A strict mother who wouldn't accept anything below a B, and he is in my eyes, a genius. Our teacher treated him so sh!tty that he literally tried to kill himself because of the snowball effect of getting bad grades and and his mom treating him badly.
Not to mention, she thinks she is a wizard and threatened to get her wand on us. She sat on 2 chairs because she was so large that 1 wasn't enough. And her students once made a petition to get rid of her.
Sorry if i sound like I'm rambling. I'm using this thread to rant.
..She thinks she is a witch, is too fat, and is unreasonably unfair?Do you have Dolores Umbridge as a teacher?
No joke, she has a poster on her wall of her photoshopped with the cast of Harry Potter
11. He seems nice.
Took some entry histories G.E. course my first year of college. The first words out of the "professors" mouth was "I know this is an entry history course most of you are taking as a requirement for another field... but I'm going to make this course so difficult, most if not all of you are going to fail or drop out"... Yeah, I walked out and signed up for a different history course to satisfy the requirement, got an A.
Some professors say this on the first day to scare off lazy students, but don't actually follow through with the threat. I had one professor who said something similar on the first day, the next class he looked around the room, took stock of how many students didn't show up and said, "This is a more manageable class size".
10. When teacher isn't as smart as you, and they hate it.
I am not a teenager and I generally don't hold grudges, but this is a grudge I've held my whole life. I will never forgive my 5th grade math teacher.
We weren't allowed to use calculators on our homework at this school and I had this absolute dictator of a math teacher. We generally had to show all our work unless it was obvious. On one of the homework, 992 had to be calculated and I thought that was sufficiently obvious (100*99 - 99) so I didn't show that part of the problem I just wrote it down. She said "no one could possibly do that in their head" and gave me a 0 on the homework. Absolutely wouldn't discuss it or listen to reason.
Same teacher gave us a puzzle out of a magazine. A friend and I solved it together, and once you had the answer it was trivial to show you had the right answer. This woman looked at it and said "that's wrong, I don't know how it's wrong but I couldn't solve the puzzle so there's no way a couple of 5th graders could"
Same teacher ended up being my bio teacher. We had to make cell drawings, I'm sure that's really common, but I put an enormous amount of work into mine. It was super detailed and well labeled. She gave me a 0 for "not using color which demonstrated that you didn't care"
I hate her.
My 10th grade biology teacher was awesome, but when we had to do cell drawings we had to have label what color we used for what parts.
After I turned mine in later that day he saw me in the hallway and pulled me aside and asked why I didn't tell him about my color problem. I was confused and said "look I know I didn't stay within all the lines but it shouldn't be a problem right?"
He looked more confused than I was and said "no, that's fine. I'm talking about your colorblindness." Next class he had everyone do colorblind tests and talked about that.
Lol that moment when you realize you're about to tell a young adult they are colorblind.
My brother had a human geography teacher that was a Flat Earther.
8. Only working when the boss is looking...
She wasn't dumb but she never liked to teach. She literally slept during lecture. She only gave tons of homework and didn't even teach how it's done.
But when our principal used to come to check, she used to suddenly start acting like she was the best teacher ever so that she doesn't get fired.
That way even we couldn't make any complaints. Good I finished my school.
Sounds like a pretty average Redditor tbh.
Seriously though, why would she pick/stay in education as a career when you can make 3 times the money looking at memes all day in an office?
7. Might wanna speak the language you're teaching...
At least five times! I wouldn't call them dumb, just not "professional enough?" Substitutes don't count I assume, but every English teacher I've had, except for one, didn't speak English properly?? (I'm in a french province of Canada) I always end up being praised for being bilingual but like.. you studied in this.. in university.. my third English teacher once asked me to stay after class to read a letter she wrote for a retiring coworker (in English) to check if there were any mistakes??? That honestly made me laugh afterwards. We hardly learn anything in English, most of the time, it's just french story telling and talking.. good job.
I had a French teacher that didn't speak French.
And another that couldn't control the class so she handed out French crossword puzzles and word searches. She was such a sweet nice teacher but that class was awful and I was so glad when I got out of it. It was grade 7 so we were together for all subjects. The history teacher got fed up at the class failing his tests (they were a bit bullsh*t tbf, asking for minute details instead of what impact they had) that he just started giving out the answers for the test for you to memorize. Then when that didn't work, giving out the answers AND having the option for open book tests for a 60%.
6. Climate denial dooms us all.
In my freshman year of high school, my chem teacher went on maternity leave, and the long term sub was nothing short of a dumbass. Not only did he not know half the material he needed to teach, he spent an entire 80 minute class period once lecturing us on why global warming isn't real.
Edit: this teacher taught us through some amateur tutor's YouTube channel for a good 50% of the course.
Edit 2: Just to clarify, this guy was a retired physics and chemistry teacher who was certified and had experience teaching the subject, there's not really an excuse for his cluelessness.
This year, during the first two months of the school year, my AP calc teacher had to be on a leave due to an injury. The replacement sub was a straight dumbass. Dude did not know what he was talking about, confused the living f*ck out of so many easy early concepts, and couldn't even do basic differentiation questions right. Add that to his daily rants about using online websites. His lectures composed of showing us the textbook for five seconds on the projector. I was so confused in that class by the time the real teacher came back. Thankfully, she isn't an idiot, so I didn't fail out. But damn, that guy SHOULD NOT be a long term sub.
5. Uh, what?
My history teacher argued with me for about an hour, he was teaching us WW2.
He was saying that Japan never took part.
English education system in a nutshell people.
I had an English teacher who was absurdly sheltered and dumb. She was in her 60s and I think she had no contact with the outside world. This was a college level ESL (English as a second language) class. English is not my first language but I was already fluent by then.
She was teaching us business jargon one day and she said a Multiplex was a cinema room with a screen on each wall (yes really) and you sat at a table and you could turn around and watch whatever movie you wanted.
Predictably everyone started talking at the same time and saying that was not how a Multiplex worked and she kept denying it. We asked her how would you deal with the different soundtracks, and if you had to pay for 4 tickets, and she said she didn't know, she'd never been to one but that's how they worked. I guess you could wear headphones...?
She got really mad and ended up walking out of the class. She complained to the dean and we all got told off for questioning a teacher (yes really). I tuned out her voice for the rest of the year and just read books.
Edit: her English was also pretty awful. Lots of syntax mistakes. I have no idea how she got the job.
4. The bison hunted *themselves* to extinction.
Not a teenager, but my college history professor told us all American Indians were vegan because they understood that killing animals was wrong.
You mean the ones that literally wear animal skin?
Those are the ones. At the same college i took part in an archaeological dig at a woodland Indian site. It was an old village site so lots of menial everyday things were found. Like pieces of pottery, hearthstones, grinding stones, FISH HOOKS! annnnd BURNED ANIMAL BONES.
3. This guy's definitely not a predator, nope.
Just yesterday we started the reproductive unit and my biology teacher literally said that it's impossible to get pregnant if you don't give him consent.
2. Sigh.
One of my first days at my new school, our year 5 teacher was reading Treasure Island to us and one of the characters had a Sabre cut scar on his face. She said that it was from a Sabre tooth tiger. I piped up and said something like "that's nonsense Sabre tooth tigers are extinct."
Her response: "Treasure Island was written a long time ago."
I don't even have a joke, just, stop letting these people teach our children.
Think I got one. She's so old, her cat is a Sabre tooth tiger... I got nothing else.
1. This is peak Indiana.
My 7th grade social studies teacher (public school, Indiana) asserted that Mahatma Gandhi was a Christian who converted from Islam.
I didn't even bother to try and correct her, crazy sh*t like this came out of her mouth almost every day and I got sick of trying to address it because the principals didn't care either. She also had a large nativity scene on her desk that took up over a 3rd of it.
Welcome to Indiana, where incompetent teaching & religious proselytizing go hand in hand.
My 7th grade social studies teacher in Indiana had a mirror at a low point on his desk that we realized he was using to look up skirts. We also gave him an industrial sized jar of peanut butter that he ate with a spoon over the course of the year. I have endless stories about this man.
- People Break Down How A Teacher Absolutely Ruined Their Favorite Subject In School For Them - George Takei ›
- People Describe The Worst Teacher They've Ever Had - George Takei ›
- People Describe The Worst Teacher They've Ever Had - George Takei ›
- People Share The Dumbest Question That They've Ever Been Asked - George Takei ›
Short of having a shopping addiction, no one actually likes spending money on stuff.
Why would you ever willingly give it away? It's your money!
Which might be why it feels so bad when you have to spend money of something that should be free from the beginning. People/ corporations are going to chase that cheddar, though, so there's little you can do besides complain, which frankly might be the best thing the internet is for.
Reddit user, woodside37, wanted to know what we should never have to pay for again when they asked:
"What should be free?"
Let's get these out of the way first...No, let's get this first one out of the way first.
Hidden fees are the worst.
Hidden. F***ing. Fees.
"Transaction/processing fees when you order a digital product online. Such as a concert ticket, where you pay 6 euro extra while you pay online, and have to print the ticket yourself."
rickmitchel
"Or processing fees to pay bills that you need. Duke energy charges a $7 processing fee for you to pay your energy bill. Like wtf."
CrispyCrunchyPoptart
Pay To Pee
"Public bathrooms! The amount of human piles of poop around because the homeless have no where to relieve themselves!"
AuntyMarcy
"Live in a very tourist-y part of the U.K., all public toilets charge and most cafes/pubs/libraries won’t let people use their toilets. As someone who lives here year round it’s really frustrating and doesn’t seem to make sense."
JonesNewport83
Want A Better Society? Educate Them.
"College. Or at the very least, college APPLICATIONS. If you're gonna require it for most careers, atleast make it accessible for people. And I just think it's stupid that people have to pay to get rejected."
callmeventibcimavent
"Oh god I hate that so much. Same with applying to apartments it’s such a waste of money if you don’t get approved. It racks up quickly too."
Kydra96
It does feel grimy when "official documentation" that is "mandatory" has to be bought and paid for not by the people requiring it, but by the people needing it.
Forcing Us To Pay For Something We're Forced To Have
"ID cards issued by the government. Especially since you need them for almost every aspect of daily living."
waqasnaseem07
"I. Exist."
"Birth certificates"
alexchico3
"I'm not the biggest fan of free stuf but having to pay for a piece of paper that says "I exist" is ridiculous."
Spaghetti-Evan1991
It'll never not feel bad having to pay for something we expect to be free, but it feels ten times worse when it's something you need to get by in life. As in, need to live.
Let's All Agree To Take Care Of Each Other
"All base needs up to a level. I mean stuff we need to survive, eg. power, water,... and things we are required to use to be relevant in daily life internet,..."
"Seeing how now power companies are fuel companies are having THE biggest profit in years while more and more families are pushed into bigger and bigger deths just to get by."
"Same goes for internet tbh, poor kids are just not getting by in school becasue they lack the basic stuff every other kid has to get further in life. I am not saying they need the fastest possible internet with unlimited dl, but give them so they can work for school so the vicious cycle can be broken."
Amelsander
We Need It More Than Anyone
"All mental health services. If you don’t have benefits or a VERY good paying job, they are unaffordable for how often most people really need them. At $120-160/ session even once a week is not affordable for most people these days"
pennylayne77
A Fine Line Between Need And Want
"Water"
selfishnerd77
"Drinking water, sure. But water is an expendable resource and it should honestly be more restricted when we think about cases like people watering their lawns."
I_Am_Become_Dream
Paying To Live
"Insulin. People are dying because of greedy pharmaceutical companies."
Astronimus123
"But We're 'Pro-Life'" - Jerks
"Birth control of all kinds."
"For anyone who b*tches about spending taxpayer money, I'd ask whether it costs more to provide condoms or to house prisoners."
AlexReynard
"Giving birth (In the us)"
z0k0n
"As a female US citizen the more I learn about the whole giving birth sh*t the less I want kids. My friend just had a baby, there were some complications. She is now paying off a 14k hospital bill! The lowest I have hears is 8k. 8k just to have a f-cking kid! For a country that is gung-ho about forcing women to have kids they have missed the mark completely."
Main-Yogurtcloset-82
Everyone is looking for their payout, and unfortunately sometimes we're the ones who have to give it to them, whether it makes sense or not.
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The worst part of having breasts is Florida.
I didn't even say large breasts. Just breasts, any breasts. Florida and breasts are mortal enemies sworn to battle one another into oblivion until the end of days.
In other states, you and your ladies can live a more peaceful life. Here in Florida, it's A Song of Sweat And Fire Ants.
Ever get tiny little jellyfish stuck under your side-boob? Happens here all the time.
Bikinis should come with a "Sand Lice, Your Titty Crease, And You" informational pamphlet.
Wanna jog? Hope you accounted for the fact that the air is soup and will chafe and cauterize your nipples.
Know what limits your field of vision, making you more likely to accidentally step on a snake and/or gator? Boobs.
Know what slows you down as you try to escape the angry reptile from the above paragraph? Also boobs.
Reddit user Saibotnl1 asked:
"What's the most negative thing about having boobs?"
Now take all this stuff they said sucked, and then put it inside of a steam oven filled with mosquitos. That's Florida.
And Florida is incompatibile with breasts.
Cardio Is Hardio
"I love them but running can be a nuisance even in a good sports bra."
- [Reddit]
"When I go to work, there is a woman that usually runs on the shoulder of the road. I gasp at how much her boobs bounce. Isn't that doing damage to tissue? Painful?"
- notanotherbreach
"Yes! I literally always hold mine when going up/down stairs so they dont bounce. Running is uncomfortable even with a good bra :/ "
- k_g94
"If it's a sports bra that holds you, it's so tight that it's impossible to get into or out of without a whole team of people like a pit crew."
"If you can comfortably get into it, it won't hold the girls for long."
"Cardio is just not worth all this."
-[Reddit]
"As a kid I wasn't fit enough for jump rope, but now that I'm older and have the big boobies it feels even more impossible to ever indulge in."
- PoiLethe
Literally In The Way
"They get in the way!!"
"Lately I've been getting frustrated with exercise. My personal trainer will say to hold something a certain way and I'll try but it's so uncomfortable because my boobs are completely in the way."
"She has small boobs so she doesn't account for them being in that space right in front of your chest."
- J09Lynn
"My English teacher in 10th grade was drinking water one day when a few drops landed on his shirt. He then complained about getting older and how he never stuck out far enough to get his shirt wet."
"I just sighed."
"4th grade. 4th grade is when I stuck out too much to avoid drips."
- wheredMyArmourGo
"So very much this."
"I refuse to do mountain climbers when my trainer suggests it, she started to get mad saying it's a great exercise. My retort was that I'd really rather not knee myself in the breasts as part of my workout."
"The lady has small boobs and replied that she had never thought of that!"
- Pauliester
Growing Pains
"Probably growing them."
"It hurts, and if you get big boobs young and quickly, it’s both physical and social agony."
"It hurts to grow them, first of all, your chest aches and bumping them against anything really hurts - and since they’re a sudden, large addition to your body, you’re ALWAYS bumping them on stuff."
"But the social aspect is worse."
"Your female family members comment on them slyly and smirk at your response."
"Your male friends look at you weird and you have to realize they see you as more sexual than girls with smaller chests, even though you literally cannot control this."
"Other girls can be nasty and jealous."
"Eventually I learned to manage all this and I like having breasts now; but from like 11-16 I was so frustrated and upset that I had developed them at all."
- Individual_Ad_7523
Two Volcanos
"The sweat and itch!"
"Also that they're like two volcanos, which isn't especially practical during summers or when you're a constantly hot temperatured person anyway."
- Queen-of-meme
"No matter what I try, the skin under my boobs never cools down!"
- Local_Masterpiece_
"Boob sweat is the bane of my existence when it's even a little bit hot outside - and sometimes even when it's not lol..."
- PleasuredMeatStick
"I hate the feeling of sweat on my boobs. I just put tissue between and underneath my boobs to hopefully absorb the sweat so it won’t start to itch and drip."
- LuckyBugHarley
Technological Advancements
"I STILL am not able to remove them after a long day. Why?!"
"Why can't I just set em aside for the night, all done. Why hasn't technology advanced to this possibility yet??"
- IAmNotLookingatYou
"Absolutely they would. The relief we would get ... oh my god it sounds divine."
"Maybe I wouldn’t be so b*tchy."
- Object_Prize
"I’d honestly probably only wear them for ren faire, and leave them at home the rest of the year."
- AbbyNormalKnits
Double Trouble
"The double standard of girls with small chests and big chests."
"If you have a big chest no matter what you wear or do it's sexual. But for girls with smaller chests they can get away with crop tops or v necks or even swim suits."
- BigBunsLittleBunbun
"Lol the bigger girls who spent their entire grade school years getting sent to the principal's office for breaking dress code will agree with you."
"Loose shirts will tent and billow up in the wind as you walk-- dress coded."
"Tight shirts that don't tent but cling to your chest-- dress coded."
"And don't even think about anything but a crew neckline, or you'll be dress coded again."
- cryptic-coyote
"Exactly!"
"I always got in trouble for wearing dresses in school, but skinny Minnie wearing something even worse gets by no problem just because she doesn't fill it out the way I do."
- APD2269
Expensive
"They're expensive."
"Bras are expensive and you need regular bras, sports bras, probably something special like a strapless or low back if you have a special occasion or something."
"And don't even get me started on women's healthcare ..."
- SailorSpoon11
"Stage 4 breast cancer patient here, and it costs me about an extra $5000/yr to stay alive if everything goes well."
- insertcaffeine
"I just stopped breastfeeding and none of my bras fit anymore."
"I’ve just been wearing sports bras every day because I don’t even know what cup size I am anymore and I don’t want to spend a fortune replacing all of my bras."
- kaytay3000
"Plus if you choose not to wear bras for any number of reasons, you’re treated as deviant or an acceptable target of inappropriate attentions."
- letsjumpintheocean
Getting Comfortable
"Laying on your stomach can be tricky."
- ChadweenaThundervag
"Laying on your back can be tricky as well."
"And on your side."
"Just laying in general with big boobs is a hassle."
- Skkaj225
"Am guy."
"However women in my life have found it difficult to get a decent back massage because of this. I've seen plenty of massage tables with head holes, but none with boob support..."
- DeluxeWafer
"Semi-suffocating yourself on the beach while trying to get some sun on your back is fun."
- Miikami
Either Or
"The fact that I look like a walking refrigerator if I wear a loose fitting top, as it billows shapelessly around my body in an odd fabric rectangle."
"But if I wear something form fitting, I look like a lady of the night and am treated as such."
- batchofbetterbutter
"OMG this !!"
"I feel like all my girlfriends around me have such a fashion sense and can wear things with such grace but I always look as you’ve described. Like either I look like a couch pillow or Jessica Rabbit."
"Sometimes I just want to cut them off honestly."
- octokisu
"Yeah I’ve been wanting a reduction since a was a teen because of the back pain and catcalling, and many people I know with a bigger chest feel the same way."
- didithedragon
"I had no idea women hated their boobs so much! It honestly is shining a light on an idea I have never thought of."
- Peter_the_pear
Attempted Murder
"They might try to kill me."
"Breast cancer runs in my family and I have to have my first mammogram this year at 36."
"My mom was negative for both BRCA genes but there are 6 others they’ve discovered since she had cancer that we haven’t been tested for."
"Insurance won’t cover me to test unless she tests positive for one."
- Outrageous-Proof4630
"Fun fun fun."
"My mom died from breast cancer at 46. I started getting mammograms at 34."
"Luckily, I took the BRCA test and was negative."
- lil_ho_on_da_prairie
It's Constant
"Constantly being sexualized."
"I’m the least sexual person but people assume I’m super sexual because of my body. And I hate it"
- Plus_Bison_7091
"Yup, I'm ace and I honestly just want them chopped off to be rid of the constant sexualization of my body."
"It makes me really uncomfortable."
- zapsquad
"My friend in elementary school had a condition where she went into puberty super early and had large breasts by 3rd grade."
"We would walk together to elementary school every morning and get cat called a lot, but we were too afraid to tell our parents because we thought they wouldn't let us walk together anymore."
"She would have teachers make comments about them."
"When we were older she talked about how insanely awful and alienating it made her feel growing up. Her younger sister had the same condition, but went on puberty blockers for it."
- gentlybeepingheart
Destroyed
"These pendulous bags of hell have destroyed my back."
"Even a decade after a reduction surgery, I remain in daily pain. And now as an added bonus they get to be misshapen, scarred horribly, and completely useless for raising a baby."
- Originalluff
"I didn’t realize how heavy they are until I got together with girl with big boobs and woooooow they are heavy!"
- I_love_pillows
"I got C cups in fifth grade and those f*ckers went all the way to G by senior year."
"My posture was/is awful and I've felt like an old woman since I was a teenager. I don't even want babies, so they're never actually gonna be useful either."
- Rozeline
See what I mean?
They're kind of awful once they hit a certain size, and that size is pretty much ANY size if you're in Florida.
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There are humane ways to tell someone to go home after a... liaison.
How can one be so rude after being so intimate?
I'm not saying you have to snuggle and profess love, but damn, a quick... "thanks, I hope life is kind to you" goes a long way.
Redditor sumyungdood wanted to hear the tea about the times they had to tell a lover to take a hike. They asked:
"What is the worst way someones asked you to leave after sex?"
Tell me your worst. Mine our stories where I had find my clothes in the dark and sneak out naked.
Don't ask...
A Late Run
"Asked if he could drive my car to the gas station to buy cigarettes and when he came back he told me he left my keys in the car and it was running."
TopOcelot13
Beefed
"An old friend invited me over for her famous beef stew. I got there, we fool around, had sex, then right after she handed me a tupperware of the stew and said 'you got sex and stew, now please leave.' Still not sure if that's the worst way I was kicked out or the best."
TheRockMan31
"Most of the people here didn’t get stew. You did okay!"
livesarah
'is it that obvious'
"Went home with a girl from the bar. After we had sex, she said something like 'soooo... think you can get an Uber now? If not, I GUESS you can sleep on the couch for a few hours.' Here I was, sitting on some random girl's couch trying to find an Uber at 4 AM. Mercifully I did find one and when the guy picked me up he said 'so, your hookup kick you out?' I said 'is it that obvious' and he replied 'you weren't the first one I drove back to their car tonight and you probably won't be the last.'"
apocalypticradish
Yummy
"Go grab some Taco Bell. You can eat it on your way home. Honestly it was better than the sex. And I don't even like Taco Bell that much."
Nobody_Wins_13
I hate Taco Bell. And since reading this... I hate people.
Mrs. Robinson?
"She lit a cigarette, then looked at me for like 20 seconds, and said 'Well, bye.' I just got dressed and left. Never saw her again."
Rhalellan
And you are?
"While dozing off, he gently tapped my shoulder, and said: 'Maribel, you can’t stay here.'"
"My name is not Maribel."
tikkichik21
"See this is what happens when you don’t let people talk about Bruno."
Brendanlendan
Go
"He got off me and started looking at pictures of other women on Instagram, and commenting on how much more attractive they were than me and told me 'oh yeah you can go now.' We were best friends for like two years up until that moment."
Caramel_Cappucino
"I’m open minded but this is exactly why I often don’t trust male friendships. You could even be a lesbian and one moment of vulnerability they may take advantage of that. I know it’s unrelated but your experience made me upset and I’m sorry you had to go through that."
L8NiGHTFLiGHT
second time...
"He rolled over, grabbed his phone, and without even looking at me said 'find your clothes, you know where the door is' and just laid there on his phone ignoring me while I gathered my clothes and left. He tried texting me a few days later because he was drunk and horny so I told him 'you know where your hand is' and blocked him."
olivinemultichrome
Gross
"We were good friends for a few years before hooking up after a night of drinking."
"Halfway through sex he told me he can't actually do this because he wanted to get back with his ex and can't mess it up because she's the hottest girl he'll ever be with. He lived in the middle of nowhere and I couldn't leave until the morning so he made me sleep on the couch."
barontayto
Wow. Some people are truly disgusting. How do you treat other humans this way?
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Most couples are inseparable and enjoy doing everything together, thanks in part to shared mutual interests.
But on occasion, some people in relationships go off in pursuit of one-sided pleasures in secret for various reasons.
These can range from going out to a vegan restaurant when the other person is a carnivore to seeing a Netflix show that is too violent for a squeamish significant other.
Because not every significant other may not share the same passion, Redditors TheTinRam asked:
"What’s a guilty pleasure you hide from your significant other?"

These Redditors needed some "me time."
Dad Time
"Everytime I go on a late night grocery run (once or twice a month) because I work nights, and my wife forgot to grab whatever, I add a $0.70 Mexican soda to the cart. It is just for me. It is something my dad used to get me on especially long days when I was a kid 'helping' him on jobsites. It is my tiny reminder of him."
– thecountnotthesaint
Story For No One
"I write stories for years now, some of the times she thinks I'm working on the computer but I'm actually writing a story. There is nothing to hide but I just keep it to myself, none of my family members know I write stories. Till today I have written 56 stories (most of them are short)."
– SuvenPan
In The Wee Small Hours Of The Morning
"Staying up late for peace and quiet."
– Blue_OG_46
Chatting For One
"I talk to myself all the time, I was actually wondering last night if it was a really weird thing to do lol"
– hottytoddy_sko
Naked And Sacred
"I will cruise the house butt naked and just do whatever the hell I want. About once a month. I won’t be able to this summer because the kids will be back in school, but come August, I’ll be naked and free again!"
– batchofbetterbutter
Some people need to get out of the house.
Self Therapy
"Sometimes I take the long way home and talk to myself in the car about my 'problems' - like Self Therapy. I put one earbud in so ppl think I could be on the phone."
"I get quite animated. It helps to get a stressful day out of my system before I get home and switch gears."
– Humble-Plankton2217
Solo Slice
"My husband has gluten sensitivity. If he eats regular pizza, his stomach hurts for a couple of days after."
"Well, I don't, so sometimes I say I'm going for a run, and I do run.... to the pizza store, eat a slice, and run back."
– sohumsahm
Catching Up With The Boys
"Covid has messed it up for a bit now. But every 3 or so months the boys and I all get up like we are going to work at our respective jobs but instead all call in sick and meet for breakfast, then go back to our one buddies place for the day to hangout. Around 4 or 5 one by one we all head home for our normal arrival time."
"It's literally the only way for us all to get together reliably. Most of us have known each other for the better part of 30 years now, going way back to junior kindergarten for some."
"Twice I have let her know my plan for the day and twice I have gotten phone calls to come home early for what ever not some emergency. So now we do it secretly."
– foh242
Some of the things people do behind their SO's backs is for endearing reasons.
Smooch Ploy
"I don’t know if this is a guilty pleasure necessarily but I pretend to be asleep when he comes home from work because he always kisses me on the forehead."
– str8outofabook
Catching Zzzs
"I love when she snores."
"She complains (only lightly) about my snoring all the time, and I always feel awful that I make it tricky for her to get a good night's sleep. When she's snoring, I know she's actually going to rest well, and it makes me happy."
– ricdesi
Scent Of A Man
"Smelling his clothes. Not creepily, like his boxers. But when he lets me borrow a shirt or a sweater I’ll put it on and just revel in the smell of him on his clothes. If I recall correctly, it definitely wasn’t like this when we first started dating. It’s been over two years now and I only remember doing this around the 7 month mark. He smells really, really good."
– he-whoeatsbugs
The Forever Admirer
"I have a whole album of 'unflattering' pictures of her. Not really something I hide, but they make me happy. She’s so silly yet so beautiful."
– Dewahll
They say that a couple that plays together, stays together.
That's all well and good. However, a significant other having some alone time should never be stigmatized.
My husband and I usually watch every TV show together, but I watch Netflix's Ozark by myself because I enjoy intense dramas, immensely.
It's not a secret. And he's glad I watch the shows that I want to watch on my own time–just like I encourage him to watch all those UFO documentaries that he's obsessed with, by himself.
No really, watch them without me.
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