Some of us are just born with brains and beauty... and some of us lack in one or more of those departments. That is just how the brain cells crumble. There really are people running around without common sense or logic that God gave a goose. And what is most frightening? Some of these people are in political positions of power. Now, you know we've all personally come across a person or six that left us shook by a few things that fell out of their mouths. Let's compare notes.
Redditor u/your_neighbor420 wanted to hear from everyone about certain people in their lives that may be missing a few marbles by asking... People of reddit, who was the dumbest person you met?After working in the food service and hospitality industry I can tell you, humanity is in trouble kids. I'm not trying to be mean, but some of the actions I've witnessed, and some of the conversations I eavesdropped on left me stunned. Stunned is the purest way to describe it. Like, how do some people survive everyday without a care giver? Let's discuss...
Stop Typing
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I know a woman who bragged on Facebook that she scored 84 on her IQ test.... She thought it was out of 100. 🙄.
For the Jordans
A customer who thought he should be able to get the Jordan Bred 11s for 90% off because of 2 "coupons" he had. One of these coupons was a print out of a 70% off clearance promotion from Nike's website and the other was a 20% off coupon from Payless that expired in 2017. I've never been more confused, frustrated, and exasperated than I was during the 10 minute interaction where myself, two managers and a customer tried to explain to this man why this wasn't going to happen.
Numbers are Hard
I was put in charge of training a girl at a coffee shop I worked at. She didn't know how to make coffee, I literally had to tell her "ok, now pour the coffee in until it reaches this line, no, pour it slower don't dump the whole pot over the cup." When trying to train her on register I don't know if she couldn't or just refused to count.
A total would be $5.98 and she'd tell the person it was $6, when people gave her anything but bills she'd stare at the change and ask me how much that was or she'd say "that's $2 right?" And there'd be like 50¢ on the counter in dimes and pennies. I tried training her on sandwich station, she would pack the food frozen into the bags and just hand it out. On her breaks I'd have to constantly remind her that 15 minutes means 15 minutes, not 20, not 30, not an hour.
We were allowed to have food at work for free within reason and only in the back. She would reach into the pastry case with her bare hand, pick up an item and just eat it at register or right next to the case. There was a lot more she'd do wrong and it got to the point where I thought she was trying to purposefully get fired.
No Day But Today
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A girl who agreed on time changes but disagreed I was talking to her on my Sunday when it was her Saturday. I lived in Australia at the time.
Damn Pennies!
During college I worked at a 7/11 for a few months and one time had to train a girl to use the register and she didn't know how to count coins. She had to give someone change and she turns to me and asks me what coins and how many of them make 43 cents or whatever the amount was and both the customer and I were speechless.
All I can do is shake my head and pray. Half of those aren't even that shocking. To be fair, math can be a stumbling block for many of us. In this day and age basic change can be an issue with younger generations as coins become obsolete, thanks to the power of plastic. That is a big part of the problem... the lack of basic life educations disappearing. Let's keep reading...
Hey Pearl...
We were in history class, taking a pop quiz. one of the questions was "where is pearl harbor?" someone raised their hand and asked "who is pearl harbor? and why would I know where he is?"
It's me. I had trouble focusing in school and thought pearl harbor was a person.
Headlines
My first girlfriend, about 20 years, I showed her one of those newspapers at the time that had made up stories about alien abductions etc, Weekly World News I think it was. One of the headlines was "Belgium Destroyed By Giant Asteroid And No One Noticed For 2 Months" and she thought it was real. Thing was she wasn't actually dumb, just really innocent and naive.
Flipper Love
Ex-girlfriend. I once said out loud "I wonder how dolphins have sex?" She said, with conviction "There aren't boy dolphins and girl dolphins. They're just dolphins." You know, like magical.
And she argues with me for about 2 hours.
You Are Where?
For months, I've been dealing with a client who doesn't get their bills.
Every month, they call and ask where it is, we confirm their address and the expected arrival date, I manually generate a new invoice, and e-mail it over.
Today, when confirming the address for like the 6th time, they said "oh, no, that's not my town or zip" and submitted an address change.
How the hell do you not know where you live?
Bless Her...
Confused Threes Company GIF by MOODMAN
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My ex-gf thought rhinoceroses were dinosaurs. Then, we were watching King Kong and toward the end of the movie she asked if it was based on a true story.
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Negatives
Worked at a bank for a (blessedly) short time. Had a 60 year old woman that asked, "What do you mean my account balance is negative?? I still have checks, so I still have money!"
I'd be willing to bet that she went around trying to write the largest checks possible in order to maximize the value per check.
Madame Cleo?
Had a friend in HS that could predict rain by looking at the stars... if the big dipper was upside down "the water would pour out and it would rain tomorrow" She was 17.
I too can predict rain by looking at the stars, if I can't see any stars its probably either going to rain or already raining.
Special Dumb
Holy crap, I'm ready...
Let me tell you about this woman that my uncle dated for a while. She was really a special kind of dumb. I'm just gonna go ahead and list the top 3 that I can remember, but I'm sure there's more. These were all relayed to me years later as I wasn't around at the time. It's a running joke between some family members.
- Thought pork chops came from horses.
- Met a guy who had lost a portion of his ear in some kind of accident. Upon meeting she just asked him with no class at all: "Hey, what happened to your ear?" His response: "I turned my head too fast and bit my earlobe off." She was totally cool with that answer.
- Went grocery shopping and assumed that whatever number of chicken legs came in a pack was how many legs that chicken must have had.
There was also something to do with a moose, but I can't remember the specifics on that.
Look Up
A girl in my class in high school asked the teacher where the sky was. Like she genuinely had no idea and when we tried to explain to her that the sky was above us outside she was like "no that's the ceiling".
"WE can now mine all the helium we need from the unsuspecting moon."
"Sun, sir."
"At night it's called the moon!"
"No like SUPER thick glasses."
In fourth grade we had a motivational speaker come in and talk to us who was completely blind since birth. At the end they had time for questions and a girl asked why they didn't just wear super thick glasses. When the person replied that they cannot see ANYTHING, so there would be nothing to magnify, the girl said "No like SUPER thick glasses." We were only in fourth grade but we all were looking at her like holy shit how do you not get this. The blind dude just shook his head.
Let's Mooo
A friend's partner said she was vegan. Another friend jokingly said 'you're not vegan, you eat corn on the cob, which is actually the spine of a cow'. Aforementioned friend's partner started crying about how much she loved eating cow spine and was really upset, genuine tears of sorrow at how she wasn't a vegan at all.
From that day forth, corn was known as Cow spine on the cob and their relationship didn't last for too long, probably a week after she asked why Mel Gibson didn't just phone the English King to negotiate in Braveheart...
Uncle Says
Uncle telling us about a guy he worked with. Guy buys a nice, new car. Car comes with cruise control and built in GPS. Guy wrecks new car. Apparently he typed in an address and set the cruise control. He thought that he didn't have to drive after setting in where he wanted to go, the car would just take him where he wanted to go.
Falling Down
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I worked a security post with a guy who didn't understand the concept of gravity. I thought he was joking at first, but he was serious. To be fair to him, he did pick it up pretty quick when I taught him.
the light...
True story. Kid in my neighborhood. Someone must have told him that if he shone a flashlight in one ear, light would come out the other ear. He didn't know i was looking. He held a flashlight to one ear and his open palm at the other. He turned on the light and tried to turn his head real fast to see his palm. He did this several times. Never caught the light. I was in awe at his stupidity.
Human race? You in danger girl. Yes some people are just... "special." And that can be just as endearing as it is dangerous. I guess it depends on the person or the situation. Let's just try to not give any of these people the nuclear codes. Ok?
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But we should also be prepared and ready to ask the right questions to have a leg up on the competition.
"What is THE best question to ask on a job interview?"
A company's history or information about a past employee were suggested subjects appropriate for questioning.
Prior Knowledge
"When you were interviewing here, what would you have liked to know before you joined?"
"This worked for me. I asked my interviewer a question about how she had personally dealt with a company policy she had just explained. She bragged about her stellar adherence to the policy. I nodded my approval. I got the job."
A Previous Employee
"One that has always gone over well for me:"
"What were some qualities that the previous employee in this role brought to the job that you would like to see carried forward?"
"Another good thing to do is research the company you are interviewing with and you can ask things about what they may be involved in or you could drop that while reading about the company, you wondered this."
Hypothetical questions were suggested as helpful examples of inquiry.
Indicators Of How Companies Treat Employees
"A question that landed me a job once was: 'If I asked your direct reports about your management style, what do you think they'd tell me?' Stumped a hiring manager and he emailed me personally to tell me about it, no one ever asked him that question but got the job.
"In my current interviews I'm asking 'what did your company do for its employees during [the virus] to improve their day to day, work life balance, etc.' and I ask 'Is there anything your company adopted during [the virus] that they plan to keep post [the virus]?"
"These questions give a lot of insight into whether a company treated their employees well."
Past Performance & Adjustments
"If we were currently sitting in my 1 year review, what would I have done in this year for you to say I excelled in my role?"
"If I could snap my finger right now and change anything about your job or the company, what would it be and why?"
The following questions about a prospective company may not be answered from initial digging on their website.
Measure Of Success & Career Trajectories
"How is success measured in this role?"
"What are some possible career trajectories within the company that could stem from this position?"
Being A Solution
"Ask them what is the biggest problem you can solve for them in your first six months with the company. Similar to 'don't think of a purple hippo,' this forces them to imagine you succeeding in the position."
Simply The Best
"Who is your best employee and why is he/she the best?"
"You will then face 2 situations mostly:"
"panicking CEO who can't answer you 'Bob who works 17 hours a day for a slice of bread' so the fear in their faces must be a big nono for you"
"entusiast CEO who actually follow their business and can tell you who is an added value for the company and why."
– ThePiz91
My experiences with job interviews are different than others seeking work in office environments.
Having had a years-long career as a dancer, my "interview" was the dance audition, where hopefuls dance in small groups of people at a time after learning a routine and then awaiting their fate after the panel evaluates their performances.
The question I may or may not have asked in such a scenario earlier in my career was: "Did I make the cut?"
I did not make the cut. And I learned never to ask that again.
I remember the worst date I ever had. My biggest regret is that I stayed for the entire thing. I should've left as soon as I realized this was not going well, which was basically at hello. But he was paying so I drank, a lot. I'll keep names and dates to myself to protect the innocent.
0/10
Big Brother Reaction GIF by Big Brother After DarkGiphy"Went to brewery, date said I had hairy arms and that meant I was horny, said "you look really awful in this light" and then tried to dig out of that hole by saying in his native language that was a term of endearment long term couples said to each other. 0/10 did not date again."
Lucky 13?
"My wife wanted to plan our 13th wedding anniversary. I was excited because usually, I plan it. She bought us some new disc golf discs and after a quick supper, we went to play. We hadn't played in forever. We were laughing and I had a great time. She served me with divorce papers and told me that the date was a test to see if she still had feelings for me. I also learned that she was having an affair that started well before our anniversary."
- rmorlock
Two Hours from Home
"Not necessarily a date but a person I was dating invited me to his parent's house for the afternoon. He wanted to introduce me to them and show me the house he grew up in. I thought it was super sweet and had no problems going. He was also in the middle of moving and needed to pick up a few things, so it really didn't seem that unusual."
"Yeah, we got there and it was awful. His entire family was there. They traveled from hours away too. This was not just meeting the parents, it was meeting the ENTIRE family. Even worse? At some point, this idiot told his parents that he had proposed. We had been dating TWO months. I spent the entire afternoon dumbfounded and just playing along."
"We were two hours from home and I had no cell service, no way to leave at all. We ended up spending the afternoon brainstorming wedding ideas and planning an Alaskan honeymoon that his parents planned to gift us. His brother even called to say congratulations! We drove back to his apartment in silence. When we got there, I got in my car and left, didn't even bother grabbing my stuff. Weirdest experience ever. I have no idea how he broke it to his parents that we weren't getting married."
You're Cut Off!
"Got set up on a blind date once between mutual friends. She shows up to the restaurant already a little tipsy, orders multiple appetizers and only takes like one or two bites from each one. Then she proceeds to order 3 or 4 more drinks and is visibly drunk at this point. She gets up and says she's going to the bathroom and staggers off. About 15-20 minutes go by so I try to call her several times but no answer."
"Finally I decide to pay the check and just leave. About 2 hours later I'm sitting at home and I get a call from an unknown number. It's the police department. She was picked up on a DUI on her way home after she ditched me and gave the cops my number to see if I could go bail her out!"
- mox44ah
Sorry?
Bbc Three Idk GIF by BBCGiphy"Well, I gave this answer on a different topic, but it ties in with this. We were out on a date, we had been seeing each other for a while, close to a year maybe. She gets a phone call. Suddenly she looks destroyed. Her fiancé had just died in a motorcycle accident."
What in the world? I mean how can we ever expect to pair off with the dating pool being inundated with liars and nut jobs? I'm going to delete my apps.
Girl, Bye.
Sassy Beyonce GIFGiphy"Had a girl openly flirt with the bartender in front of me. She says she wasn't. But handing him her own phone and asking for his contact info in front of her date seems like it to me."
Crazy!
"Came out from a movie, late at night, and date's Camaro was stolen. Apparently, he called his WIFE (that I did not know he had) and let her know where he was and what happened. She showed up and realized he was on a date! She started chasing ME around the parking lot telling me she was going to kill me. Saved by the cops who showed up just in time to take the auto theft report."
Hey Mom
"Met a girl at a country bar one night in my 20s. We were both pretty drunk but hit it off pretty good. Ended up getting her number and we agreed we'd go on a real date. Fast forward to the date, she gets in my vehicle and... she looks almost identical to my mom. I was mortified. I was polite and we went for lunch where I found out she also had a boyfriend she "wasn't sure if she was into". Never talked to her again."
- SgtGo
Liars...
"When I was in college many years ago, before the advancement of cell phones and social media, I was chatting with a girl I met on a BBS who lived on Long Island, NY. I was 18 at the time, but lied and said I was 22 because she said she was 25. We spent a few weeks emailing each other, as well as calling each other."
"We even exchanged pics. When we finally met up, things blew up. Turns out we both lied about our ages: She was really 33, and lied because she thought she looked younger. She admitted she sent a college photo to me. We still had dinner together, but it was awkward as hell. We never spoke again."
Doubles
Kill Me Now Season 1 GIF by FriendsGiphy"It was a double date. She was more interested talking to the other girl throughout the whole thing. Found out later from the other guy that his girl cheated on him with my date."
Ummm... I think I'm just going to stay single. That is a handful of crazy. Why can't people just be honest? I swear the search for love warps people's brains. Be careful out there people.
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