This might sound odd but... not all conspiracy theories are created equal.
I once met a guy––only one, I swear––who believed, truly believed, that the world was flat. I swore to myself that it couldn't be true, that people like this couldn't exist, but there he was, a flat-earther in the flesh. Even worse: He believed world governments were in cahoots to conceal the truth from the rest of us.
I had pretty much nothing to say to that.
After Redditor grovestreet69 asked the online community, "What's the dumbest conspiracy theory you have ever heard of?" people proved they've met even crazier people than I have. (I pity them.)
"That the moon..."
That the moon doesn't exist. Once found this youtube channel where this guy would film the moon at night and point out how you could tell by the edges or something that it was a hologram. It was just, wow. Forget the moon landing being fake, there is no moon.
"I seriously think..."
I seriously think people who believe Avril Lavigne died and was replaced by a double overestimate the importance of Avril Lavigne.
That Disney killed Lindsay Lohan's "twin" after filming Parent Trap.
"America and China..."
America and China created Corona to bankrupt Mexico.
"Dentists are the ones..."
Plaque is planted by dentists to sell more toothpaste. Dentists are the ones who assess your teeth's cleanliness. Dentists give you free toothpaste for cleaning your teeth well.
"The idea is that..."
The Phantom Time Hypothesis is probably my favorite dumb ass conspiracy theory. The idea is that the modern calendar is a fraud and we're actually in the 1700s because 300 fake years were added onto the early middle ages for... reasons.
"My mother in law..."
My mother in law firmly believes all Pepsi and Lays products are made with the leftovers of aborted babies.
"You really believe...?"
Flat Earth. You really believe that millions of scientists, engineers, pilots and sailors are conspiring to trick us about the shape of the planet Earth? What would they even gain from such a conspiracy?
"Not only is it dumb..."
Holocaust denial. Not only is it dumb it's also very cruel and offensive.
"I lost more brain cells..."
That dinosaurs are fake. When I asked the guy who thought this he said it was the government that planted fake bones everywhere and has people dig them up later. Said it was a way for them to drum up money. He asked me how do I think they found the fossils? Said, "what you think they're just randomly finding bones everywhere? Nah brah, they gettin told by the government where to dig!"
I lost more brain cells that day than a night of heavy drinking.
"My mom believes..."
My mom believes that everyone is experiencing oxygen deprivation because of masks and it's causing everyone to go crazy.
"I had to yell..."
I had a roommate who was utterly convinced that CAULIFLOWER WASN'T REAL. I had to yell that because he seemed to have to yell it too... his reasons were ever changing, completely illogical, and wonderfully hilarious. Was he serious about it? You bet your ass.
The sinking of the Lusitania was a false flag operation to get the US to join the war.
"What possible outcome..."
So let's ignore the stupid idea of people lying for pleasure and actually apply things with logic.
What possible outcome would lying about Earth being round achieve? It won't affect economy, it won't cause cancer, it will do literally nothing. You'd be better off trying to make a case for how inbred Hollywood is.
"I think the dunbest conspiracy theories..."
I think the dumbest conspiracy theories are the ones that endanger other peoples lives by convincing them not to wear a mask.
"It hurts my brain..."
I have to go with the 5g Covid thing. It hurts my brain to try to understand the theory of it. Usually I can at least understand a conspiracy theory.
"People think that the American government..."
People think that the American government uses pigeons as a way to spy on people. But like everyone in America has a phone that knows where you're at what you are doing what you watch and what you say even when you sleep. It's just funny to think that they have all that and the best they could do was pigeons.
I think the dumbest one is the "lizard people" conspiracy that I found on YouTube. Key people in the U.S. government have been replaced by lizard-like aliens who can shape-shift to look like humans. But sometimes their concentration slips for a moment and you'll see their faces revert to their natural appearance. In the video, you see Barrack Obama momentarily reverting to his "lizard state."
"I wish I was making this up."
Hands down best conspiracy out there is Former Flat Earth.
In a nutshell: Earth is round. Obviously. But it used to be flat! In fact, it was flat right up until it was hit by the meteorite which wiped out the dinosaurs. See, the impact folded the flat Earth round into a ball. And the dinosaurs? They're doing just fine! Because they live inside the Earth.
I wish I was making this up.
Most of my family believes COVID/quarantine is just a social experiment done by the government to see if we would conform. I'm surprised they were able to keep me alive for this long.
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