Nobody is better than anybody else. Why is that such a difficult concept for so many people? One person doesn't get a pass for certain things that another person would be scolded for "just because."
Even in family dynamics, double standards are at play. Why should sons get a later curfew than daughters? Why can't a man vacuum? HOW are we still having these conversations?
It's time to break down the constructed hierarchies that have been imposed upon society. Let's get it all out there, so that we're all aware, so we can do better.
Redditor WistfulNightSky wanted to discuss the most unfair issues we all face on the daily, by asking:
What double standard are you tired of?
One of the worst places where double standards are constant is in the hospitality industry.
Take my time...
email GIF
Giphy
"My principal taking days to read and reply to my emails, if ever, VS me being told at 8 in the morning that I should have known something because he sent me an email at 10 in the evening the night before."
- mljb81
"bend"
"Politicians who come up with dumb to asinine laws, and vigorously enforce them upon all of the regular citizens, but somehow find ways to exempt themselves from being subject to the same obligations to keep and follow them, as we are."
"Easy. Big corporations and the rich, using legal bribing through lobbying to "bend" the rules in their favor more and more as time passes."
Bullies
"Defending yourself. The fact that someone can punished for defending themselves when no one else would, in my experience worse, is bullsh*t to me. Example a former bullied kid that punched back and got screwed."
"In my case, I got beaten up, didn't retaliate at all. Bully had rich parents who supported the school. So I was the one who got in trouble as I allegedly swore and instigated it, meaning him beating the crap out of me was apparently self-defense."
Speed Racer
"Speed limit laws bother me the most on this. You're telling me, on a road on which there are no cyclists or pedestrians, that I have to drive 25mph, but the mayor can drive 40mph to a press conference that he's late to and abuse the privilege of a police escort. See: NYC Vision Zero.
"They also use this law to increase red light cameras. For further context: in NYC a yellow light means "slam your brakes now"/"stop now" more than it does "slow down"/prepare to stop as it does in other parts of the country. Meanwhile a counter study (I will try to find he source later) showed that increasing the length of a yellow light by something absurd like one or two seconds would decrease the amount of red light violations significantly more effectively because people would have adequate time to stop while still allowing for a flow of traffic."
"Obviously, it's all a money grab. Meanwhile the mayor regularly is caught on camera flaunting this traffic regulation when he finds it inconvenient. It's infuriating. NYC has enough congestion as it is, so knee-capping people when they can finally move is just insulting."
Finding the Best
Job GIF
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"Entry level jobs" that require experience."
- Arctinii
"They think it weeds out the ones with no experience, but it just gives them candidates who are prepared to exaggerate or lie."
How does one acquire experience without being given a chance to earn it? Quite the conundrum.
Check the Clock
Seth Meyers Time GIF by Late Night with Seth Meyers
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"Your boss getting angry if you're a couple minutes late but then expects you to have no problem regularly staying on 2+ hours after your shift is meant to end."
People Describe Their Best Chance Encounters | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Are chance encounters really serendipitous or is it part of some grand master plan? While we may never have an answer for why we come to meet certain people ...Liars
"To borrow from Matt Haig: people being ok with mental illness until someone shows symptoms of one."
"100%. People like to talk about being cool with it, act all understanding, and then get super hostile if someone with untreated mental illness shows up. They don't mind it when they can't see it, but can't handle it when they actually see it in action."
All out Assault
"Customers being able to verbally and sometimes physically assault workers while the worker just has to stand there and take it or they'll be fired."
- lydiaj02
Nurse here. Almost every single one of my colleagues has been physically assaulted at some point in their career. We are often discouraged by upper management not to press charges or contact the police. We're also often asked what we could have done differently."
- tbaymama
In my Mouth
"Why is dental insurance different from "health insurance" aren't teeth part of my overall health wth!!"
- talwen69
"The dentist lobby game is strong. They've pushed for decades to not be considered part of the health industry and they've banked because of it. Sure I understand it's a specialty, but my teeth are attached to my skull."
The Bad Dipper
"My boss dipping out on a Thursday afternoon to go get messed up at the golf course, but I ask for one Friday off every few months and he's like AAHHH CMON MAN I NEED YOU TO BE A TEAM PLAYER!!"
Just Wait
"I have to be exactly on time for an appointment or risk a fine and no appointment. Yet a doctor can make you wait hours sometimes without even a "thank you for waiting" or "sorry about the wait." ~ cutiegirl88
"I can't stand that. Then, they only spend maybe five minutes with you tops. I have asked to do video or phone check ups, and was given a big no, but it's not like they even look at you these days. Why can't we do that on vid chat?" ~ Rightfoot27
Against the Norms
"Some people I know who are strongly against gender norms told me that I shouldn't have a say in my wedding since I'm a man… and that my fiancé alone makes the decisions It was pretty freaking confusing." ~ vajapocalypse
"This sounds a lot like my husband and me. I've always been a planner and my husband is very laid back, but we planned everything together. People always say it's the bride's day, but that's such BS. Our wedding was done on a low budget, but it was themed to Star Trek vs Star Wars and in a planetarium. So it really felt like we were planning a costume party more than anything lol." ~ Tiki108
Swipe Never
"The tinder attitude of "impress me," and "I have standards," "Be funny," "Don't be boring." "Meanwhile person is boring." ~ solvent_causis04
"All. The damned. Time. There's also "I just want someone to travel with and get lost on trips with." Yeah, I wish I had a lot of money too. Oh wait, you don't have a job?" ~ OPossumHamburger
Lawless
Donald Trump Water GIF by Election 2016
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"Politicians being able to openly violate the law and nobody does anything." ~ TheGrandExquisitor
The Star Effect
"Star student athletes are nearly untouchable. If they make the school look good the school will almost never take action against them." ~ HonoraryCanadian
"As evidenced by the fact that at my college, several of the football "stars" would literally just park wherever they wanted and never get towed/ticketed. I'm not talking about things like parking in the faculty lot, or where you don't have a pass. I'm talking things like parking on the sidewalk in front of the student union, after driving over a curb and 20ft of grass to get there." ~ ender4171
Calling HR
"How it's perfectly okay for a potential employer to ask your salary expectations even before an interview, but a candidate asking what the job pays is somehow a red flag for HR and a big no-no. Like, if all the employer cares about is what I will cost them (before learning anything else about me), then I should be able to freaking ask too. But no, I'm branded as only caring about money. And you don't you corporate prick?" ~ CrieDeCoeur
For the children...
"When company's say they are family friendly but don't want you to work from home or help with child care." ~ Pewcachan
"Mine's championing "work-life balance for everyone in the country" while also dragging us back into the office for no freaking reason. Working from home saves me an entire work day worth of commute each week. Leave me be!" ~ obscureferences
Plastics
"Consumers are expected to curb the use of their plastic waste and carbon by corporations and regulatory bodies alike while Nestlé will destroy a natural habitat to make bottled water in plastic bottles and dump the waste into your grandma's urn if its affordable." ~ Aledeyis
Being Me
Confused Excuse Me GIF by GIPHY News
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"Struggled with social interactions growing up. Half of my life was people telling me not to take things so personally. The other half was being told to conduct myself a certain way so I don't upset people." ~ Cuesport77
Learn about it...
"People that say 'don't worry about what other people think, be yourself' but make judgments about people based on behavior they don't understand. If you don't understand something, ask about it. Learn about it. Talk about it to gain an understanding. I wish more value was placed on learning/understanding people's intentions vs what you see on the surface. And don't say things unless you really mean them." ~ wheresmywang710
Nows we know better. I hope. Be a better boss and a better person. So we can be a better society.
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"Straight men of Reddit, what is the strangest thing you have been told not to do because 'that's gay?'"
The following behavior just screams, "gay," fellas. Watch out.
Song Choice
"Sing a Lily Allen song during karaoke."
– KentuckyFriedEel
School Protocol
"Advice I received in high school from other students:"
"Don't cross your legs with one knee over the other. Put one ankle over the other knee."
"When carrying books, palm them and carry them at your side. Don't rest one edge of the books near your waist."
"Never button the top button of your shirt."
– Gorf_the_Magnificent
Look, But Don't Look
"This one time, at summer camp, this guy who'd just been swimming in the lake told me you could tell how cold the water was by how hard his nipples were. 'But don't stare too long,' he said, 'because that's gay.'"
"You were the one who told me to look in the first place!"
– SonOfTheShire
Sandwich For Sissies
"When I was a kid, my dad called me a sissy because I cut a sandwich diagonally."
– captainmagictrousers
Getting Woodwind
"I played the clarinet. I got called Faginet a lot."
– Virtual_Caramell
"But that's one women do," one might argue.
Daddy Duty
"Changing my daughter's diaper. Mentioned it in the office one day. Called gay."
– Bullydaddy
A Lighter Shade
"Buying a white IPhone."
– Freshrendar
"Added my husband (then boyfriend) to my phone plan. Went to the store on my own to upgrade both our phones. We both just wanted the next gen Samsung. It was only available in purplish-pink in store."
"I shrugged and said it didn't matter, he's putting a case on it anyways. Guys working at the store kept trying to talk me out of it, actively pushing me to go to another store, making them lose commission, just so my partner wouldn't have a feminine phone. He used his pink phone for 3 years."
– Caity26
Life Skills
"I've been criticized for knowing how to sew and cook. Those are essential life skills!"
– placeholderNull
"My father was a Marine drill instructor in the 50's. Guess who did all the sewing in my house growing up?"
"Yeah, no one dared to call him gay for it."
– desrever1138
Here are examples of guidelines for being a manly man, according to manly men.
Manly Appetite
"Not a straight man but... back in my bartending days I asked a man if he wanted to see a dessert menu. He said 'if I wanted dessert I'd order wings like a real man.'"
"Weird flex but okay."
– BigJiggies
When I'm In The Mood, I Masticate
"When I'm feeling extra manly, I just take a bite out of a cow and then chew on some raw wheat."
"Like a man."
– AmigoDelDiabla
No Appointments Necessary For Straight Men
"I left a pick-up basketball game because I had an appointment to get a haircut. Evidently, the only straight way to get a haircut is as a walk in."
– patricksaurus
Abiding By The Law Is So Gay
"Using turn signals. And not as some sort of euphemism, but literally using them while driving to turn or change lanes."
– Sargatanus
In grade school, some fellow classmates asked me to check for gum on my shoe because they saw me step in some.
When I lifted my leg to take a gander, the boys were howling hysterically as if my actions confirmed something.
Well, it sure did. Apparently, if I l looked at the bottom of my shoe from in front of me, I was "normal," but since I bent my leg back and looked at the bottom of my shoe from behind, that made me "so gay."
Although, I didn't come out 'til years later, maybe those goons were onto something. Thanks for the heads up, guys.
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