Let's not tell your mother about this, it'll be our little secret.
Chances are you've messed up at least once. But luckily for you, you had your dad on your side, and he was willing to do what it took to keep you out of trouble. And sometimes, if you ever caught your dad slipping up, you did your part, tooo.
After Redditor links-shield632 asked the online community, "In the spirit of Father's Day, what was your 'don't tell your mother about this' moment?" fathers lined up to share their stories. And those who aren't fathers shared memories of their own fathers!
"hey don't tell your mom, I'll get it fixed"Giphy
I was with my dad and we thought it was a good idea to start a small fire, on the porch, the wooden porch. It was made of mostly paper and we made sure to scatter the embers and everything but after we went inside and to bed, the wind must've kicked up because we came outside the next day and there was a giant hole burned into the porch. My dad just told me,"hey don't tell your mom, I'll get it fixed," he the proceeded to cover it with a small table. She found out anyway and we're pretty lucky that the house didn't burn down.
Saying this in honor of my dad as he is very old and does not reddit, he once cut the end of my toe off as a baby cutting my sharp baby nails and my screaming brought in my brother. Hey joined forces to get me all bandaged up and told my mother I'd banged it into a wall or trapped it in a door or something? My mum found out (and by extension so did I) when I was 10.
A wholesome one: for my mums 50th birthday he bought her a set of vintage diamond and pearl earrings and a necklace. I helped him choose them out. I'm never allowed to tell her just how much they cost.
Dad and I used to rent a movie each week for when mum had dinner with friends. Usually things like star trek or action films. One day (I was about 11) he came home with "Blade." We got about 10 minutes in and he turns to me and said "don't tell your mother about this, let's just say I forgot to get it this week". Of course I agree.
Fast forward 7ish years, dad blithely drops at the dinner table the fact that we watched blade when I was about 11. Silly dad thought there was some kind of statute of limitations on this.
"When I was 5"
Not a real "don't tell your mother about this" moment, but when I was little, my dad had a workshop in the garage where he'd do wood work. I'd come out and talk to him while he worked, and he'd let me sit on the car that was parked in the garage. He framed it as something that was so bad and edgy and we couldn't tell my mom, and I was five, so I believed it and felt so cool without actually doing anything wrong or dangerous.
"Out of Ammo"Giphy
My dad, brother, and I went out to these dunes near where I live with bottle rockets. We each had an empty milk jug and each took like 20 bottle rockets for ammo. Then, we ran around launching bottle rockets at each other. I was the youngest, which made me the hardest to hit, so I won the rocket war. But yeah, mom never found out
Daughter speaking for her father.
In high school, everybody was always busy at work or clubs, so I was the first one in my household to get home nearly every single day. Dad was having money troubles that he didn't want to disclose to anyone, so he paid me $5 a month to take the bank statement letter from the mailbox and hide it from my stepmom until he got home. It was the closest thing I got to an allowance.
P.S. I had no idea what the "money trouble" was, BTW. I was always the "don't ask, don't tell" person, so that's why he trusted me the most about this.
"figure something out"
We forgot my passport during vacation and were already at the border station when we noticed. My dad then said that we won't turn back but that he will "figure something out". Turns out he smuggled me successfully across 3 Border crossings without my passport. Before we arrived at home, he told me not to tell my mom about this.
"Quid Pro Quo"
Not a father but a story about mine. one day I decided to pull a sick day at school and came down stairs and saw that my dad was making a coffee, I asked him what he was doing and why he wasn't at work and he said I could ask you the same question. We stood in silence for a moment and he said I won't tell your mum if you won't. We had a good laugh about it and he let me have the day off.
"The Pre-Covid Days"Giphy
When my wife's at work, I will take my daughter (4year old) out for breakfast, then we will go on a small adventure around a shop of her choice and pretend whatever she wants, last time we went to a car parts shop and rolled tires around as we were freeing the rollings from monster, so far my wife doesn't believe her when she later on grasses me up. Tbh its the only thing pre-Covid i miss doing.
"WHAT IS HE DOING ON THE ROOF?!"
Dad was putting new roof shingles on. I was probably 3 maybe 4. I asked if I could help. He said if I could climb the ladder sure. I was always climbing so that was no issue. Climbed right on up and started handing him shingles. It would have been a "don't tell your mother" moment had she not come home from grocery shopping. After several back and forth of "Where are you" and "Up here mom" she figured it out and flipped out. "WHAT IS HE DOING ON THE ROOF?!"
Edit: I'm not a dad so I posted on behalf of my dad.
My dad used to wake me up at night when I was in middle school to watch Jack@ss with him. We would be absolutely wheezing with stifled laughter while my mom snored through it all. Thanks for jogging this sweet memory loose in my head, it's been a long time.
My son randomly walked to the kitchen, 3am (was finishing up some call of duty) and he saw me eating ice cream. So I got him a bowl and we were whispering like nerds (he was 4) and I said "don't tell mom" and he said "don't tell mom!"
Didn't do the dishes following morning and my wife asked who had ice cream, the traitor pointed right at me lol.
"Out of the Radius"
One for my dad.
My dad took me to my first MLB game (God I miss baseball ;_;) and told me not to tell my mom.
Later found out it was because the game was a good bit outside of the travel radius set in the custody agreement. They were arguing a lot more than usual at the time so he knew mom would say no if he asked about it, but really wanted to take me to a game. Told me not to say anything so she couldn't use it against him while trying to take him to family court again.
Luckily I didn't say anything and we got to keep sneaking away to games until the travel radius stopped being a thing. Dad still has the tickets too.
I took both kids out at around 13 to show them how to drive. Just in big empty parking lots or in the neighborhood but they loved it and I enjoyed a little secret with them for a while.
I had a similar thing, but we have a large yard (like almost 2 acres) so one year when we were dealing with branches from the yearly pruning, he let me drive the pickup to the back field. No big deal right? Well our pickup is from the mid 70s and our yard has a bunch of trees and cars scattered around. I should have hit something. The only reason I didn't drive all the way to the back was because I couldn't make it up the worlds smallest hill. Lol. Kept spinning the tires.
"Waffle House Tales"
Story about my father. When I was about 6 or 7 we were really hard up for money at the time, so we cut down on all expenses, saving change, ect. My mom would go out of town for work every other weekend. My dad would save up a few dollars over the weeks, take me to Waffle House for breakfast, go on a walk on the beach, then take me home and let me play the I Spy computer game on his work computer. He would always teasingly tell me not to tell mom about Waffle House, I don't think she would have been mad but it was fun to have something just the 2 of us would do together. I love my dad ❤️.
"Out With Dad"Giphy
When I was in middle school I was the only one willing to go shopping groceries with my dad, he didn't want to go alone and my mom was at school studying her master's. None of my siblings wanted to go with him. We used to go to Carl's Jr., have a big breakfast, and then we went grocery shopping. Nobody knew, not even my mom, until years later. He would also let me buy any cereal I wanted. That's actually how I learned how to buy good fruit and veggies, how to order meat and fish, etc. When my siblings found out they were angry bc "they would've gone if a big breakfast was on the menu". My mom just laughed. Nowadays they sneak to have breakfast together before going grocery shopping since we're all grown up.
"Dad watch out it's the 5-0!"
When my son was 6 I was playing Grand theft Auto late at night. He wakes up and comes to the living room, tells me he can't sleep, and asks can he watch me play. I say he can but not to tell his mom he agrees with a big smile. Maybe after about an hour he is playing and I'm watching and helping him. He can't stop laughing driving into people and running from the cops. I was telling him to watch out for the 5-0 and he asks me what that means, so I tell him it's the cops, he just shrugs and keeps playing. Now fast forward about a week later and we are all driving in the car. All I hear is a scream of "Dad watch out it's the 5-0!" And I absolutely start crying from laughing so hard all while his mother is questioning where he learned that. He just says "YouTube." She found out later that I let him play GTA, but I hope the memory of that is as special to him as it is to me.
"my kids ratted you out"
Female coworker of mine was miserable at work one day. I asked her what was wrong... she told me it was her anniversary, and she knew her husband had forgotten. She had pre-teen girls at home during summer vacation.... I knew her home phone number (pre-cell phone era). I called her home phone and one kid picked up. Explained to the kid who I was and that she needed to call Dad at work and remind him it was Mom and Dad's anniversary.... and don't tell Mom OR Dad I called.
The next day she was all smiles, gosh he DID remember, brought home flowers and took her to dinner. Mission Accomplished. Not a word was ever said about this....
Until 6 years later, when she left the company. She gave me a hug at a farewell luncheon, and whispered "my kids ratted you out. Thank you".
"It's My Time"
When my 3 year old wakes up in the middle of the night, like maybe 3 times a month, instead of putting her back to sleep okay her stay up and partake in whatever it is I am doing no matter what. Sometimes she falls asleep in minutes and some times she stays up for a couple hours. I think it's amazing times, I think it may even be dream like for her by the way she speaks and moves. She has painted with me, heard my books read aloud, watched lord of the rings and cooked creme brûlée. The rule is, it's my time so if she's gonna be with me she does what I'm doing just like o do for her all day long. She totally gets it and never makes it about her.
My goodness, thank you everybody for your comments and your awards. What a special day to be recognized as a father.
My dad and I (around 5 years old) were on our way home from a car show when we were getting followed by the cops. My dad struggled to put on his seatbelt quickly in hopes he wouldn't get a ticket. Unfortunately, we got pulled over. This might have been the first time EVER that I saw a cop this close up let alone speak to one. I was a deer in headlights the whole time.
Well, with a cop on either side of the car, the officer leaned in and asked my dad why he was swerving. That FOOL told the cops I was tickling him. The cops looked at me straight in the eyes and asked if this was true. I was too scared to say anything and just nodded yes. The officers smiled and said, "Never to do that again while your father is driving, ok?" They left without any further words and my dad gave me the lecture of 'don't tell your mom.'
tl;dr - Dad and I get pulled over when he tried to get his seatbelt on, blamed it on me tickling him instead.
I was having a good heart to heart with my step dad as a teen. We were chilling in the Shop where he does most of his odd job work, and by the end of our conversation he pulls out his bong and asks "Wanna keep going? But don't tell your mom she will throw my @ss through a window" Ironically enough the way they met was at a bar and my step dad was hitting on her and she said she could throw him across the bar, he dared her, so she did. He told me that was the moment he knew he would fall in love with her.
Edit: The entirety of this thread is so wholesome and wonderful to read it's taken up a good couple hours of my time going through all the stories posted here. Brought some happiness to this bleak time for many people and that makes me happy.
"Not the Puppets"Giphy
When I was younger my dad and I would always go to the movies together, it was our thing. I always looked forward to it. Also, when I was about 11, we would often watch family guy or South Park together; certainly not age appropriate, but nothing to terrible I don't think.
However one day he took me to see Team America: World Police when it came out (made by the guys who did South Park). I think he realized his mistake during the puppet sex scene, and immediately after said "don't tell your mom about this". RIP Dad, love and miss you!
Dad scratched the car after an idiot turned and rammed into us. He told me to just keep it a secret and he slid me a few singles to keep my mouth shut.
But she found out anyway lol.
"Song out but Quiet"
My dad sang "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" to us once, and we cracked up. So when Mom had a weekend business trip and Dad had to entertain us, he went out and rented Monty Python's Life of Brian. Mind you, he hadn't seen that since it was in theaters, some 18 years earlier.
Dad, at the video store: hmm, I don't remember this being rated R. Well, I'll be right there with the girls, I can explain anything that's a bit adult.
Dad, after the movie: Kids, it's very important that you don't repeat any of the jokes you've just learned about naked people or private parts, especially not at school... Or to your mother!
"goodness what is all that?!"
When we were kids my dad took me and my sister out on a bike ride. My sister had her own bike while I was sat in the kiddie seat on his. At some point we come to a stop, and I guess my sister was still a little unsteady on her bike because she started wobbling. In a bid to help, my dad leaned over to steady her, so much so that I flipped right out of the seat (in true 90s fashion there was only the single buckle to keep me in) and landed right onto asphalt.
I was fine except for the deep scrapes right across my face and abdomen. It was completely an accident but my dad panicked and told both of us "oh god don't tell mom" and ushered us home to patch me up.
He caught some hell from mom because he couldn't hide a face injury especially when it started scabbing over into an ugly mess but he impressively managed to conceal the rest by volunteering to be the one to bathe me and put me to bed every night. It got found out anyway a couple weeks later when we were playing with an inflatable pool and a family friend was like "goodness what is all that?!"
"Poop & Britches"Giphy
My stepson is 6 and pooped his pants yesterday. I was knocking on the bathroom door because I had to use it. He yells out "DON'T COME IN I HAD AN ACCIDENT, GO AWAY!" I asked him what accident? He said "Go to your room I had an accident" So I asked him if he needed help cleaning it up he said "ok come in then" I open the door and there he is underwear on the floor and a paper towel in his hand filled with poop. It took a lot for me to not laugh in his face. I was proud of him for doing a pretty good job of cleaning the mess. I rinsed his britches we got him changed and he told me to get the laundry done so we knocked that out before mommy got back from the store and she is none the wiser... We look like we did chores instead of playing all day.
My dad used to hoist my siblings and I to the ceiling in a garbage can with a come along and swing us back and fourth. Fun as hell, but "don't tell your mother."
I was in middle school, my father gradually bought computers and monitors for us 4 kids and himself and the 5 of us would play World of Warcraft together for many days and always log off one hour before mom got home. We'd rush all the chores in that one hour. That's when we had teamwork at its finest. She never knew we all played cause she thought it was the devil.
Edit: I've never had 1k+ upvotes before. I can't wait to show my dad how much love he's getting on Father's Day. Thank you! Happy Father's Day everyone.
Edit 2: thank for for my first award! My dad doesn't have reddit but he'd say this.
"I'm Bigger Now"
It was a series of moments, and we were crappy at hiding things from mom.
When I was very little, dad worked first shift and mom worked some evenings. Dad liked to watch The Twilight Zone and the like. I enjoyed them too, but would get scared after he put me to bed and they played hell getting me to sleep. Hence, mom ruled that I was not allowed to watch them anymore.
Every time mom was at work, I would wheedle until dad let me stay up late and watch his shows with him. I would promise that "I'm bigger now, I won't get scared, I'll go right to sleep". And every time, mom would get home from work at 10 PM and I'd still be awake, wide eyed and scared of the dark.
In the winter, he would put the toboggan behind the four wheeler and take us out into the fields and ride around. My mom found out after it tipped and my face got beat up and was bleeding everywhere. Fun.
Edit : A toboggan is a sled in the use of a item you slide down on in the snow
Edit 2 : Whoever gave me an award, thank you. Thank you so much.
Edit 3 : Ok whoever gave me gold is very kind soul.
"Away from Uni"
During the summer holidays from Uni, me and my dad went for some drinks down the pub. He seemed a little off and anxious. I asked him why but he was really cagey. Eventually he said he'd tell me but I had to promise not to let on I knew. Him and mum were getting a divorce. They were waiting until my sister's exams were over before they told anyone. Growing up my parents were always at each other's throats but the previous month or two had been really nice with my family doing stuff together. Turned out he'd been trying really hard to change my mums mind. Had to keep my mouth shut for about a week. Was a very weird time.
My grandpa (he's a father) took us fishing when my brother and I were 5 and 8. He saw a lure stuck in a tree like 50' up a cliff face on the other side of the stream and cast after it. Literally got his lure stuck on the same branch as the other lure first try (how?). Sat us down on the bank, told us in exact words that we were "never allowed to tell grandma about this", and put his waders on. Waded across the full runoff mountain creek and climbed the damn cliff with full waist-high rubber waders. Retrieved both lures, downclimbed it, came and got us and walked back to grandma cooking us dinner hand in hand.
I told grandma at his funeral. She smiled, cried, and was pissed at him. He knew what he was about.
"Miss you, Opa ❤️"
Granddaughter speaking on grandfather's behalf.
When my mom was young, her mother would always bake a bunch of sugar cookies and store them in the pantry until Christmas. After she baked them, my mom and her dad would sneak into the pantry one at a time and eat the cookies. After about 2 months, they had finished the whole batch. My grandmother went to fetch the cookies on Christmas only to find crumbs left. She was pissed, lol. Miss you, Opa ❤️.
My dad let me drive his car. At 10 years old. It was a few feet, but I ALMOST destroyed the garage before hitting the parking brake to stop it.
"well I've seen it now"
Not a father (mine passed) but as his daughter I'm sure this is definitely his biggest 'don't tell your mother' moment, with me at least, I can't speak for my brothers.
I was about 13/14 and had chronic insomnia. My dad worked nights so on his days off he'd often still be up late. I was burning some mix CDs on my computer and ran out of blank discs so I went into the lounge to go get a couple more from the cupboard. I walk in on Dad watching lesbian porn (I remember 2 blondes with huge fake boobs).
Dad flinched. I covered my eyes and for some reason thought to myself 'well I've seen it now' and made my way over to the cupboard at the other side of the room to still get those blank discs. Walked out without saying a word.
The next morning, Dad came down to me and said 'please don't tell your mother.' I never did. A couple of years later he got really sick and after about 10 years of severe COPD he passed away. I look back on this and laugh. It was gross to see, sure, but looking back it's funny. And it reminds me of a time when he was healthy. Damn I miss that man.
"Learning on Video"
Our boy is ten. I was his teacher the latter half of this Covid year while my wife worked and learned very quickly he is terrified on video calls. Last day of school all the kids were to do a live thirty seconds on the screen to say goodbye to their actual teacher in front of all the other kids in their Hangouts window. I knew our son would never do it and my wife was insisting he do. Big battles. She promised him a friend could stay the night if he did the call. The boy and I pre-recorded the audio and had a static image of him to look like the screen was buffering while I played the audio from my phone into the laptop. He got the sleepover.
My dad and I were emptying the car of a half side of beef to the freezer when I noticed that he was having some issues holding the packages and there was a thick bandage peeking out of the cuff of his shirt with some blood on it. I asked him what was wrong with his wrist, to which he replied "A glass shield on an electric meter shattered at work and slit my wrist. I had to get stitches. Don't tell your mother"
"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! DAD HURT HIMSELF!"
"I said DON'T tell your mother!"
My dad taught me how to play "Throw rocks," where you toss a handful of rocks in the air directly above you and run away before they hit you. I was playing it one day with my cousin and got clunked on the head by a big one and bled all over my face and shirt collar. I went crying to dad and he paid me a dollar and a piece of gum to keep quiet about the throw rocks game and just tell mom my cousin threw it at me. My relationship with my cousin has been irreversibly damaged since then because I lied on him and he never wanted to talk to me again so we drifted apart.
"Outside of the Scottsdale, AZ city limits"
Welp, I'm a dad, but I think my best story would be from MY father. He wanted to take us outside of the Scottsdale, AZ city limits to see Halley's comet (it was a huge deal when it came through in the 80s.
We drove about 45 min north of town into deep desert. We spent some time viewing it, it was rather disappointing, and we heard dogs barking in the distance when we first got there, but they seemed closer. Then closer. It was pitch black, I think we had a flashlight but that was it.
We started heading back to the car, the flashlight was shined at a fence in the distance and about 5 terrifying looking dogs started right at us. We literally got the doors to the car shut as drooling, snarling, dogs started jumping up to the windows and getting in the bed of the truck. We peeled out, and don't tell mom about the dogs ok? Your mom's brother was almost killed and eaten by dogs when he was little.
"All Before 6"
My dad was a teacher and when I was 11, home for spring break, i decided i wanted to make home made donuts while my dad graded papers in the dining room directly off of the kitchen. He had my little brother in there with him, he was about 1 at the time.
I made the dough, I got the oil in a pan nice and hot and then turned my back for long enough for a fire to start.
I thought i could handle it on my own, and carried the flaming pot to the sink and turned on the faucet.
I can only imagine what it was like for my dad, sitting there calmly when a fireball bursts through the door.
All I remember is his hands grabbing me and tossing me outside, then chucking the baby out, followed by the dogs.
He put the flames out, looked at my hand (miraculously not badly burned at all) bandaged it up, drove to home depot, and had the kitchen repainted before my mom got home from work at 6:00.
I'm a writer by trade. Marketing for work, fiction for myself. Every night I tell my son a story before bed. Lately I've been actually been telling him child-friendly versions of my stories.
My wife wonders why he falls asleep so easily for me.
"While building the outdoor play set..."
While building the outdoor play set for my five year old, I drilled a screw completely through a board and into my shoe, barely stopping just as the screw broke skin. I swore right in front of him, something along the lines of "Mother-f****** f*** mother f*****." We are sworn to secrecy to this day.
"My dad was very worried..."
My dad has passed away so I'll tell this on his behalf:
My sister was maybe 10 or 11. My dad was very worried and had been waiting all day for us to come home from school. When we got home he pulled her aside saying he needed to have a serious talk with her. He said to her "I was looking for a pencil, and found this in your desk" and pulled out a plastic baggie filled with some dried plant material. She said, "oh, catnip?" He thought it was pot. We would make little cat toys with catnip and the bag had ripped so she put it in a ziplock bag. He sighed a huge sigh of relief and laughed and told her he thought she was doing drugs and asked her not to tell our mom. He was so embarrassed!
"The next day..."
This last Christmas my four year old helped my wife wrap one of my gifts. It was late so I was working.
The next day, while my wife was at work, she came running through from her bedroom first thing and yelled excitedly "daddy! Daddy! I helped wrap your gift it's a surprise it's a slushie maker!"
"Honey that's awesome but you aren't supposed to tell me that"
"I know, I know, but it's a slushie maker!"
"If you know not to tell me then why did you tell me?"
"Because I'm just so excited to make slushies with you!"
I was crying with laughter at this point and told her that it's an awesome gift but to keep gifts secret, and I told her we wouldn't tell mummy so she wouldn't be disappointed that I knew what it was. I ended up telling her that evening because it was just too funny and cute.
"My dad had this heartbreaking look on his face..."Giphy
I have a wholesome story of my own dad. I was born very early, at only four pounds. On top of that, or possibly as a result, I have a fragile immune system, especially so when I was young, and up until a few years ago, I got seriously sick (fever, vomiting, sore throat, the whole shebang) five times or more a year. I would become so dehydrated from vomiting or get such a high fever that at times, I had to be brought into the emergency room. As a result, I drank exclusively pedialite to counter that when sick, and I developed a serious distaste and hate for the stuff.
My dad was responsible for bathing me one night to help me cool down, I must have been six or seven at the oldest. We were on a vacation, and even as and adult, I always get really sick during or after traveling, and I had inconveniently gotten sick while we were staying in a hotel. I'd had a high fever, and my body was so sore and tired I'd slept for 24 hours, no one could wake me up, and I hadn't drank anything in that time. So my dad put in front of me a very big glass of pedialite and told me I had to finish the whole thing while I sat in the bath. I took it as obediently as I could, but a fourth of the way in, I just felt so miserable and mad that I started sobbing.
My dad had this heartbreaking look on his face, and stroked my hair, near tears himself. It was late, and we were tired, so he wrapped me up in a towel, and put me in bed with he and mom. My dad drinks a lot of mountain dew, and he told me that for every three sips of pedialite I get down, I can have a sip of soda to help wash out the bad taste, but don't tell mom. I never did, and it's one of my favorite memories of me and my dad.
"One night when I was about eight..."
One night when I was about eight, after I had gone to bed, my Dad was playing a Nintendo game, Legend of Zelda I think. We had both been playing it but we were stuck. He finally found a secret passage, paused the game, and came upstairs to wake me up. He told me he figured out where we were stuck, "snuck" me downstairs in a blanket (I'm sure my mom knew), and I got to stay up after midnight on a school night, hiding under a blanket, to see where the hidden passage went. It was a silly little incident, but very memorable.
"I have always worked in restaurants..."
I have always worked in restaurants and get home late nights. On Fridays I treat myself to takeout. Not just any takeout, the bad stuff... Cheese fries topped with Gyro meat, steak nachos with guac. Always a large, always with a big bottle of beer they sell singly. When my girls were little they would sneak down late at night and we would munch bad food and watch really bad funny movies with all the swear words in.
"It was my weekend..."
It was my weekend with my 15-year-old son; we had divorced when he was 10. We were at a pool party BBQ at my friend's condo complex and I had brought a couple sodas for him. The dude cooking the chicken overcooked it and was dry, and another friend had pilfered one of the Dr. Peppers so my son needed something to drink, I suggested he go back to the condo and find something in the fridge.
Then he pointed at the plastic pitcher with about a glass left of margarita, I said OK but don't tell your mom. I figured he would just take a mouthful to wash down the food but nope, he pounded the whole thing. I was like OK, well there wasn't that much in there so no biggie.
I said "Damn dude didn't think you were gonna chug the whole thing!" He was like "what, is there alcohol in it?" I was like "yeah duh it's a margarita". He said "but you guys used to make us kids margaritas when you had people over the house!" I said "Yeah, virgin ones with just ice and the mixer in the blender, not the adult version with tequila in it!"
Well next thing you know he's super chatty, actually talking to all my friends like a normal outgoing person instead of his usual teenage introverted small talk.
Problem was it was Sunday and I had to take him back to his mom's that evening. I was planning on getting chewed out about it, or she would find it hilarious, honestly it could have gone either way with her I could never predict how she would take it.
Luckily she was out when we got there and I told him to just go to his room and take a nap, he already fell asleep in the car on the way there. She was none the wiser, I think some time later he eventually told her about it and she did find it funny after all.
"My wife just laughed..."Giphy
One night I was enjoying a small bit of ice cream after my four year old daughter went to bed. She came downstairs and 'caught' me. So I offered her a small bite, but since she was supposed to be in bed, I said "Don't tell mom." She assured me she wouldn't. My wife wouldn't have cared anyway but it was a fun little game to play.
After she went up to bed and I was down on the couch, she snuck in to the master bedroom where mom was resting. She told mom that I had let her have some ice cream, and she was afraid of "sugar bugs" so could she please brush her teeth again.
My wife just laughed at me the next day. Little girl ratted me out to brush her teeth, something she doesn't like doing anyway.
"College was over a decade ago..."
My parents helped me out with rent during college. They'd send me a check every month for $800 which was honestly really nice of them. My mom usually does it but for whatever reason my dad did it once and spelled my name wrong on the check. Like "Alicia" instead of "Alissa" so it wasn't just a spelling error but also changed the sound of my name a bit. I didn't notice until I was at the bank in line at the teller already and I called my parents.
My dad literally said the words "Don't tell your mother about this" and didn't realize my mom was on the other line 😂 to this day he says he was just distracted and in a rush...
College was over a decade ago but my mom still plays the "At least I didn't forget what our daughter's name was" trump card now and then.
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Don't be alarmed: There are some terrible corporations out there (looking at you, Nestle) but there are also some great brands that are selling decent products.
I know, surprising, right? Maybe we've all just gotten used to brands selling things of questionable quality that when we stumble across something worthwhile it stuns us.
Hold on tight when you find a brand deserving of your loyalty!
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor spwf asked the online community,
"What brand(s) do you swear by and why?"
"Their cast iron pans..."
"Lodge. Their cast iron pans are super durable and can last a lifetime."
Not just a lifetime. Your Lodge cast iron will outlive you, if (and even if you don’t) take care of it. Even if they get rusty they can be resurfaced. And damn is it satisfying to resurface a forgotten cast iron pan.
Asics, specifically the Gel-Nimbus series. I've suffered from joint pain and unbearable plantar fasciitis from a relatively young age... These shoes are life savers. Very pricey and I don't love the look of tennis shoes of any type but nevertheless I will praise these shoes to the end of days. Hopefully, I will always be able to afford them once a year.
Glad to hear you've found some much-needed relief!
"Warranty and service..."
"Victorinox. Excellent pocket knives, multi tools and their kitchen knives are probably the best ones you can get under 100 USD. Warranty and service is top notch."
Anyone who cooks, but can't afford or doesn't want to invest in a professional-grade chef's knife should get a Victorinox. They aren't nearly as good as a top tier professional chef's knife, but they are night and day compared with everything else in their price range.
"This one brand..."
"This one brand of granola bars called Sunbelt Bakery. Every other granola bar brand is so dry I can't eat them anymore."
Yes, these are so good! An excellent choice.
"Dickies. High quality pants. They're meant to be work pants so they're pretty durable and breathe well. Very comfortable."
"High quality" is right. Those pants last forever.
"It helps clean..."
"Dawn dishsoap. It helps clean dishes and it's great when one of my kids has an accident and I have to wash their clothes. Sometimes leaves a small stain but no smell. It has saved so many outfits."
Fantastic – it sounds like you should be their salesperson.
"They don't use..."
"New Balance. They don't use slave labor to make shoes."
They are comfortable and fit well.
I personally still don't like the aesthetics of many of their shoes, but still recommend them to people who want a good shoe.
"They are a retailer..."
"REI. Stand behind everything in their store. They are a retailer but you can beat something up they sell and they give you a full refund."
Many people use them for shoes, for camping gear... all kinds of stuff. They're very reliable.
"I wear my Timberland boots..."
"I wear my Timberland boots almost every day, I’ve had them for almost ten years, and they’re still just about as sturdy as they were the day I bought them."
These shoes tend to last forever. "Durable" is the perfect word.
"One large bottle..."
"Dr. Bronner's Castile soap. One large bottle lasts me about a year and I use it for everything. No toxic BS in them like pretty much every other soap and they smell fantastic."
"Also when I say everything I really mean it. All purpose cleaner, dish soap, body wash, shampoo, carpet extractor wash, dog shampoo, it’s called 18 in 1 for a reason."
If you're interested in the story behind the company, the documentary Dr. Bronner's Magic Soapbox might be right up your alley.
See? Not all brands are terrible. After reading about some of these, it might be time to change of your buying habits.
Have some suggestions of your own? Tell us more in the comments below!
You know what would be great?
If society could just stop with arbitrary dress codes. If you're not working with the public, why should you have to dress up so much? If you're a police officer, then it makes sense that you'd wear a uniform that identifies you as a police officer. If you're Ted from IT who sits in the backroom all day, I really don't see why you have to come in every day in a suit and tie.
Let's just toss them out, shall we?
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor Levels2ThisBrush asked the online community,
"What should be socially acceptable but isn't?"
"Leaving the office..."
"Leaving the office whenever you've finished your tasks for the day."
This is why I'm so glad remote work is the new office.
"And yet, I get it!"
"Taking off sick from work, WITHOUT giving an invasive reason. I supervise a small team and so I see all the OOO emails, and for gods sake I want people to PLEASE not feel the need to explain in detail what kind of diarrhea is afflicting them, or how bad their period cramps are, or how much bad sushi they ate the night before. Just say “I’m under the weather, I won’t be online today.”"
"And yet, I get it! I do it too! I feel guilty or like I’ll be looked at with suspicion if my reason for taking off isn’t sufficiently debilitating enough!"
"But… we need to stop this. As a manager I don’t care, I don’t THINK the people above me who are also on these emails care… let’s just all agree to take sick days without any details from now on!"
I do not miss my retail days where I had to organise someone to cover me and beg on bended knee.
"Cashiers or workers who don’t need to be standing all day not having a stool or chair."
Another thing I do not miss from my retail days. Having to stand for hours and hours only to come home with my feet killing me was not fun.
"Prices on apartments..."
"Prices on apartments and their respectable reasons for such price directly on their websites or advertising without the need for a tour or any secrecy."
I always assume if I have to ask the price I probably can’t afford it.
"Being quiet/not wanting to engage in conversation all the time."
In Finland, if somebody tries to talk to you, they are probably a tourist.
"Choosing not to..."
"Choosing not to have toxic family members in your life."
It feels very liberating once you accept that you don't have to put up with it.
"Employees calling customers out in public for being a**holes."
Absolutely. Many customers get away with treating employees horribly because they know they can do it without any pushback... most of the time.
"The fact that I sometimes..."
"The fact that I sometimes need to take my insulin in public. No, Karen, I am not doing drugs, I need to live."
You’re getting that sweet sweet insulin high… the high of being not-dead.
"Afternoon naps. I’m on team nap. Give me 25 minutes to charge up and I’ll give you back 3 hours of high quality work. Everyone wins. Plus I go home with extra energy instead of dead tired."
Short naps don't work for me. I can't do a 25 min recharge. When I take a nap it needs to be like a solid 2 hours
"Salary transparency. For some reason, in the US, there’s a taboo or stigma around discussing one’s salary. This should be done openly and freely, with zero embarrassment or judgment. The only winners from avoiding these conversations are the corporations that are able to pay people differently for the same roles. Speak up!"
The "for some reason" you're referring to is simply propaganda on behalf of corporations.
It's evident that something's got to change around here, and we're mad as hell and we're not going to take it anymore!
Have some observations of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
As much as many of us don't like to disrupt the status quo, there is only so much time a person can tolerate a miserable situation before things become so unbearable that they ultimately have to peace out.
For some people, it takes a while for them to reach a breaking point. Eventually, there comes a time when they realize their self-worth is more important than continuing to please others who don't appreciate them for the sake of keeping up with appearances.
Curious to hear from people whose patience ran thin and made a strong decision, Reddit Prestigious-Order-62 asked:
"What made you say 'f'k this sh*t im out?'"
The unwarranted reprimanding was something that was never mentioned in the initial job description.
"In the late 90’s."
"One time I got pulled into the Security office at a Department store I worked at. They accused me of constantly using the sales day coupons for people that didn’t present one (we always kept an extra copy at each register). I had watched my own department boss do it many times so I assumed it was okay. We didn’t even collect the coupons to be counted for the cash office, we just chucked them after use."
"They claimed I lost the store hundreds of dollars and had been watching me 'for months' do this awful, unforgivable crime for people spending 90 bucks on already bloated price designer jeans. I’m sure the occasional 10% discount was just devastating. 🙄""I got this huge lecture of how I was LITERALLY stealing from the store and they COULD call the police but would give me a chance to work off the damage. I couldn’t believe how criminal I was made to feel over it. The best part when they called my boss in who pretended to have never done it before to save her own a**."
"I asked if they were firing me. They said 'Yes and No. You will be let go, but you can choose to work off the damages so we don’t take you to court.' I told them I will just quit and asked for my last check. They said they will deduct what I owe from my last check. And I said 'Well then you need to show me all the footage and prove that I was stealing.' They wouldn’t produce footage, finally called the cops, and when the cops arrived, they were just as confused and called it an internal problem and advised them that this was overblown. I think they felt sorry for me. So finally upper management came in and just said 'just issue the last check, I will sign it here.' So much drama over so stupid a thing."
"It was sad because that actual day my Mom and daughter had come to the mall to meet me for lunch and I had to explain I just was forced to quit that job and was never allowed in that store again like I was some awful jerk."
"It was nice a few short years later, the entire chain bankrupted."
"A coworker waited until we were in front of a large group of people to start 'disciplining' me for something 'wrong' I did (I took my lunch 15 mins late to help another coworker) when she wasn’t even my supervisor. Applied for a job transfer the next day and couldn’t be happier where I am now."
"I had a piece of sh*t of a boss. He'd praise you in private but berate you in public. In front of coworkers and customers. Always about stuff that didn't matter."
"He'd also happily break company policy to side with customers after you spent an hour telling a customer you can't give them stuff for free, for example. Any time he was around, everything was miserable."
"My only regret is that I wasn't there to see him marched out by corporate when he got fired, because I had gone on to a better job by then."
Human Punching Bag
"I used to work in a Kitchen at a pub, it was grim work, but I had freinds there and had worked there for 3 years, So it wasn't too bad."
"One Christmas season we were being absolutely pumped, full out functions and busy services. My boss at the time was very stressed and fair enough, We were busy, We were all working overtime and full out. He used any excuse to completely blow up and absolutely scream at me for little to no reason, essentially him yelling at me was his stress relief. But fine, whatever, kitchens are rough places, no appolagies or anything, move on."
"I then go away for 3 weeks over the Christmas holidays and spend the time road tripping around the country having an amazing time."
"First shift back, not pleased being back, he makes a snarky comment."
"F'k this, Im out."
Even though these employees weren't chewed out in front of co-workers, the low salary without room for negotiation made them not wanting to stick around for much longer.
You Only Get One Job
"They cut my hours so I had to get a second job. 3 days before I was supposed to start said second job, my manager at the main job told me that I couldn't get this second job because I had main job first and I needed to make it my priority. That's when I said f'k you and left. I didn't even give a notice, I literally just sent an email saying I wouldn't be coming in the next day, grabbed my sh*t and went home."
"I used to work Retail and after 7 years at the company, I found out I was only making 50 cents more an hour than someone who just started yesterday. I understood if they couldn't pay me more and asked for a good schedule. 7-3 or 8-4 every day and the same two days off every week. I didn't even ask for weekends off."
"I was told that they couldn't give me a good schedule so I quit."
Situations weren't much different outside the work place. Social dilemmas prompted these Redditors to say, "nope."
"Went to a pub because a friend kept asking. When I got there, he was with a group of people I didn't know, so I introduced myself and got the next round. As I come back with the tray, I hear them saying something along the lines of 'why is that b*tch still here? I thought she was just supposed to drop off a bicycle?' 'Ya, we don't want her to come to <this other town with more pubs> and now she is drinking with us?' 'She's so dumb' *proceeds to imitate and ridicule me as I was actively listening and nodding when I was having a conversation with my friend."
"Gave the beer to random people and walked right out after saying good evening to my friend and briefly explaining I did not appreciate being tricked into being a bicycle taxi for people who hate me directly after meeting me."
A Shocking Incident
"I was on my boat fishing for bass. I casted out my line and watched the lure hit the water but the line just floated in the air. Lightning and thunder crashed and the line fell to the water. F'k this sh*t, I'm out."
"She lined my bed with broken glass put the blankets over it and I dove on in lol."
"Edit: She was violent/crazy and on drugs, was like the 20th attack I took and that made me really think lol."– MyLifeForAuir1
Ally For The Ex
"I found nudes of his ex (from ten years ago) that I’d previously asked him twice to get rid of tucked in a pair of MY socks. Our couples counselor asked why he’d kept them and he said, 'You know. In case I ever needed to blackmail her.' He said it like it was a perfectly normal and reasonable thing to plan to do. The therapist and I locked eyes and I noped the f'k out of there and moved out."
Most of these Redditors realized leaving their situation was better than dealing with the consequences of sticking around.
The latter is never a good option. Why remain in a scenario you know is already going to consume your soul?
The lesson for today is–Don't be miserable. Your sanity is worth saving.Besides, you would never know that something better awaits if you just don't get the F out.
As we enter into the summer months, people now have to decide whether or not they want their morning coffee to be hot or iced.
Lucky for them, it's delicious either way.
One could make an argument that foods that are equally delicious hot or cold are perhaps the best, or at least the most reliable.
And this can include foods which are not customarily sold both hot and cold (cold pizza anyone?).
Redditor NectarineOther4989 was curious to hear which foods people enjoy either hot or cold, leading them to ask:
"What is something that tastes good both hot and cold?"
Fresh out of the oven, or the next day!
Chocolate withstands all temperatrues
"Chocolate."Chocolate Satisfying GIF by HuffPostGiphy
Can't go wrong with fruit and pastry
"Apple pie."- Hak_Saw5000
This doesn't only apply to food
"Revenge."- pushthestartbuttonkarine vanasse revenge GIF by HULUGiphy
Let the flavor develop
"2 totally different flavors depending on warm vs cold from fridge."- nonkowledge
So many to choose from!
A matter of textural preference
"Cheese, ya fools."- eat_dontpray_loveCloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs Eating GIFGiphy
Under a hot greek sun, or during a cold winter's eve.
While there's no better smell than a batch of chocolate chip cookies fresh out of the oven, those eating them the next day likely aren't missing out either.