Doctors Share Unbelievable Patient Stories That Made Them Think, "How Are You Still Alive"
Doctors Share Unbelievable Patient Stories That Made Them Think, "How Are You Still Alive"
[rebelmouse-image 18348255 is_animated_gif=The human body is capable of some amazing things normally when you consider everything required to keep us going daily. But every now and then you hear about someone who really beat the odds and survived the unsurvivable. Who better to share those stories than doctors?
Reddit user TheDestroyer asked, "Doctors of Reddit, what made you say 'how are you still alive'?"
Here are some of their stories.
When the Party's Over
[rebelmouse-image 18348256 is_animated_gif=I had a college student come into the unit on the night of their 19th birthday. They wanted to party, but had a test the next morning. One of their "friends" told them that if they took one Adderall for every drink that they had, they'd be sober by the morning. They had 15 shots and 15 20mg Adderall tablets.
If you were wondering, no, that does not make you sober. It does, however, make you rip off all your clothes in a hallway, spit at the nurse that is trying to help you, defecate all over everything, and then literally die. Luckily for them, they weren't dead for good. We got them back and they spent most of their sophomore year of college in a hospital, with a hole in their neck, learning how to walk again.
Be Still My Beating Heart
[rebelmouse-image 18348257 is_animated_gif=I had a guy with a Bowie knife sticking out of his chest. The knife was pulsating. I could literally count his pulse from across the room.
The Stories They Could Tell
[rebelmouse-image 18348258 is_animated_gif=I used to do elder care and was constantly amazed at some of the tough badasses I took care of.
Man - 99 - Once ate dinner with First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt. Made sure to serve me ice cream as his wife of 73 years lay dying (I was caring for her, she was in a coma and on her last journey), because it was a warm afternoon and manners must be followed, regardless of circumstances. I tried to refuse, but...he's 99 with a dying wife. It was strawberry.
Woman - 96 - Was in the Nursing Corps in the Navy/Marines in WWII. She married a Marine. She told me, "I always like 'em rough and ready!" Her lecherous grin spread its icy fingers into my soul, and I had to laugh.
Woman - 101 - Tried to murder me with a clothes iron because dementia can change people into superheroes when they think the care aide is a stranger breaking into their house.
Woman - 96 - An atheist Jew from New Jersey, with the accent to boot. WWII Navy nurse. She would threaten spam callers with murder. Graphically. It was hilarious. She also had me pick up a package for her. Turns out, she gets her weed delivered. (from California)
A Century Plus 10%
[rebelmouse-image 18348259 is_animated_gif=Simply meeting someone who was 110 years old. (Wow!)
Thank Goodness There Weren't Any Fish
[rebelmouse-image 18345316 is_animated_gif=(Worked) in diagnostic imaging at a hospital and we had a man come in for an x-ray complaining of chest pain. His records showed his last visit was two years prior when he got drunk and fell into a fish tank, breaking it. ER stitched him up and sent him home. Fast forward two years, and we are all gathered around the computer screen looking at an X-ray that showed a 12 inch long piece of fish tank glass sitting in his chest, with his aorta resting right on top of it (it was on an angle running from his left shoulder down towards his right hip). There were other shards of glass too, but this one was the biggest. Emergency surgery happened right away.
Oh no
[rebelmouse-image 18345320 is_animated_gif=Anesthesiologist here. A shotgun under the chin can completely remove a face and frontal lobe of the brain while leaving the patient very much alive.
100% Alive
[rebelmouse-image 18348260 is_animated_gif=Guy comes in with a bit of chest pain. tells me the big coronary artery on the front of the heart was 100% blocked. I tell him "who told you that?" he says his doctor did about 10 years ago. I don't believe him since patients never ever get any of the stuff their doctor tells them right. I let the cardiac surgeon know what this guy said and he too goes "haha 100%? so he's dead?"
If the biggest coronary artery is totally occluded and for 10 years no less, you are a dead man. Lo and behold...we get an angiogram and it was f'ing 100% occluded. The artery on the back of the heart made a connection with the front of the heart to pick up the slack. It was some lucky stuff.
Helpful
[rebelmouse-image 18348261 is_animated_gif=Patient stabbed himself in the neck with a thermometer that pierced his trachea. Missed all the important arteries (carotids, vertebrals); just hit some minor nerves.
Good guy patient provided his own temperature reads until they removed the thermometer.
Just a Little More Time
[rebelmouse-image 18348262 is_animated_gif=About 20 years ago, I had a patient come in with obstruction of his colon by a large colon cancer. The cancer had spread to his liver, and CT scan showed the liver basically replaced by metastatic tumor. So he wouldn't die of intestinal obstruction (I won't go into detail, but trust me, it is a very unpleasant way to die) the patient, his family, and I decided to try placing an expandable metal stent through the tumor. It worked! His obstruction was relieved and he was able to go home to spend his last days with his family.
18 months later the patient came in for an office visit...for heartburn.. He was even more jaundiced than when I first met him, but he felt basically well and was eating well. The stent was still functioning. I never saw him again and assume he finally succumbed to his disease, but he got at least 18 months of precious and really GOOD time.
Touchdown
[rebelmouse-image 18348263 is_animated_gif=Not a doctor....but my best friends brother-in-law during the Superbowl was acting totally normal until about halfway through and started talking gibberish, walking into walls, taking all his clothes off, and generally being NOT himself.
It took about 5 EMT's to even get him in the ambulance because he was fighting them all off, and he continued to do so until they took him to the local hospital where he was put into a medically induced coma and airlifted to 'The Shit Is Real Hospital'. Turns out he had bacterial meningitis and he had been acting like that because his brain was had gotten so swollen.
Everyone was convinced he was going to die because of how severe it had gotten before he presented any symptoms. It took him weeks to recover, relearn how to talk, understand where he was, etc...but he did. He completely 100% recovered. Doctors think it was caused by a dog bite. Which I've never heard of...his wife and kids also tested negative thankfully.
Benefits of Obesity
[rebelmouse-image 18348265 is_animated_gif=I'm an ER nurse. Had a guy walk up to the front desk after hitting himself in the throat with a chainsaw.
All the flesh of his neck was flayed open. I could see his trachea and his right jugular vein. If he had cut in just a tiny bit deeper, he would have sliced right into both.
The only thing that saved him was that he was a big fat guy with a huge neck. A skinnier man would have died very unpleasantly.
They're Called Internal Organs for a Reason
[rebelmouse-image 18348266 is_animated_gif=I was in school to be a paramedic and I was doing my externship in an ER. A guy came in happily complaining about a sore on his belly that wouldn't heal. He was really pleasant and didn't seem to be in much pain. When he lifted his shirt, we could see his liver.
Slight Overreaction
[rebelmouse-image 18348268 is_animated_gif=Guy had an argument with his girlfriend, wanted to leave the apartment. Instead of taking the door, was real angry and jumped off the balcony, fell down 40 feet directly on his heels on cement.
He ended up having an ankle sprain. I wondered how he managed previous issues in his life.
One for the Medical Books
[rebelmouse-image 18348269 is_animated_gif=Not a doctor : My grandfather had a heart attack . He went in for a simple stent in his heart. Hours go by and we hear code blue over the intercom. Doctor comes out to tell us his left ventricle has an inch and half tear in it. They had to transport him to another hospital ASAP. He died three times that night and went through 11 pints of blood. The surgeon successfully repaired the torn ventricle. They woke him up on my birthday and he sung me happy birthday. 3 weeks in Cardiac ICU my grandfather walked out. The surgeon told us for a man of 75 years to have lived through a left ventricle tear is unheard of. The doctor wrote a Journal on him as well. He's still alive today. He even got his hip replaced a year after.
Don't I Look OK?
[rebelmouse-image 18348271 is_animated_gif=Saw a guy with a machete lodged up into his skull. Asked him if he was OK (not sarcastically, just threw a generic question to check his ability to respond), he said "yup!"
Small Mercies
[rebelmouse-image 18348272 is_animated_gif=A patient I took care of had a car fall on his face. He was underneath it working when it slid off of the jack. The only reason he survived was because he broke every bone in his face (he had a Lefort III) which allowed for his brain to swell (he also needed an additional surgery to relieve the pressure of cerebral edema, but the facial fractures did allow for a great deal of "give" in his skull). I was rotating through ICU so I first saw him just a day after the accident. His head was so swollen, he didn't even look human. Fast forward a few weeks later... I was rotating through a different unit in the hospital and came across the same patient. He was quickly recovering and had minimal neural deficits.
This End Up
[rebelmouse-image 18348273 is_animated_gif=Pathologist here: Had a guy who had died suddenly and unexpectedly. I soon learned he was the recipient of a lung transplant about 15 years prior.
When I opened the man up, his transplanted lung was upside down. I flipped the lung into the proper position, and bloop. It flipped right back to upside down. That was quite alarming. The surgeons who originally performed the transplant incorrectly attached the organ. When he by chance entered the correct position, the lung flipped over, causing his pulmonary artery to seal shut, resulting in his death.
The man lived for 15 years with a lung that was dying to flip upside down. And it was only by sheer chance he didn't move in such a way that allowed it to do so until the fateful day of his death. It is one of the most fascinating cases I have ever witnessed.
Married People Explain What They Miss Most About Being Single
Reddit user Dramiotic asked: 'Married people of Reddit, what do you miss about being single?'
Young couples in love aspire to cement their adoration by taking a walk down the aisle.
And while many happily-married couples don't have any regrets about exchanging vows, it doesn't mean a spouse never reflects fondly on a time when they were single.
In all deference to those who are married, there's nothing wrong with a spouse feeling nostalgia every now and then.
Strangers online who are married shared their thoughts about a former status when Redditor Dramiotic asked:
"Married people of Reddit, what do you miss about being single?"
One thing that annoyed Redditors was misplaced items.
Disappearing Objects
"Things being where I left them."
– dramioneff
"That is one thing my wife does that is a head scratcher. I wear contacts and it is very important to her that my empty contacts case is in the cupboard under the sink. For the longest time, I wore shoes that even though they had laces, i could just slip my feet into them. My new shoes need to be tied and untied. I'll put my old shoes on the basement steps for when I need to quick run out garbage, but she'll always take them down to the basement at the bottom of the stairs. Why can't I just leave those things there? It's a small inconvenience, so I just let her have her quirks, but I don't fully understand it."
– OffTheMerchandise
Comb Caper
"When I was younger, I used to wear my hair longer. I also went to work early, which meant that I'd shower and be gone before my wife (and kids) got up."
"My only request was that there be a comb in the bathroom so I could comb and straighten my hair after my shower in the morning. If I can just have that, I'll shower, get dressed, and be out the door without waking anyone. Please dear, can you just leave the comb in the bathroom? Please?"
"But too many mornings I'd get up early, take a shower, and then be without a comb. I'd have to come out of the bathroom and start turning on lights, making noise looking for a stupid comb in my wife's purse or somewhere else in the house, while my hair is all frazzled and I'm half dressed and everyone is still sleeping."
"To mitigate this, I tried making sure there was a comb in the bathroom the night before. I'd buy a pack of 10 combs and put them in the bathroom, but they would all be gone within a few days. I'd hide one comb with my stuff in the bathroom. But 9 times out of 10 there would be no comb anywhere in the bathroom when I needed it."
"The only solution that worked was for me to hide a comb in my sock drawer. And I hid a backup in my underwear drawer. Worst case I could quietly go from the bathroom, grab the hidden comb, take care of my hair, and return it, without waking anyone up."
– 15all
Another added factor complicates things.
Not Getting Anywhere
"Being able to go somewhere ten minutes after I decide I want to."
– Certain_Note8661
"That's my only regret. It's not marriage that stopped it though. It's the kids."
– mysteriousbloodfart
On Their Time
"Incredibly impossible. Whatever their schedule is, that's your schedule. Wife's on a night shift tonight and is getting ready to leave in a few minutes. Pre-kids if she was on a night shift I'd essentially be able to do whatever I wanted. These days, one has school tomorrow and the other's at daycare. So I have to cook dinner now (as soon as I submit this post actually), and then as soon as that's done it's shower time, then bedtime."
"And once they're asleep, I get to clean the house so it can be destroyed again tomorrow afternoon when they get home."
– _ficklelilpickle
Delays And More Delays
"The Bluey episode, Sticky Gecko, encapsulates it perfectly. Bluey’s mom spends nearly the entire episode trying to get the kids ready to go the park, and the she is trying to be on time because the other mom they are meeting with is a stickler about being late. Finally Bluey’s mom snaps and says they aren’t going because nobody is getting ready. The girls finally get ready and they start heading out the door, when Bluey’s mom gets a text from the other mom saying they are running late."
"The show is really amazing because while it is ultimately a kids show, there are tons and tons of separate parent themes in basically each episode."
– 6BigZ6
Sole Decision
"Not having to consider anyone else when making a decision."
– Haunting_Assistant66
Quiet time is valuable and is often missed.
Enjoy The Silence
"Being able to come home from work and not speak a single word."
– Dull-Pickle4040
Working Out A System
"Both my husband and I have very socially demanding jobs so we’ve come to the agreement that the first hour (some days, hours) we sit in silence together (or separately) and just do our own thing. Usually it’s zoning out redditing on the couch on our own devices and we just end up sending memes and screenshots to each other. Quietly. It’s wonderful."
– addisonclark
Cancelling The Noise
"Long comfortable silences are golden."
"My wife and I both grew up in absolute chaotic households. Her parents hated each other, divorced, but nobody ever left the house. Her dad was a worthless drunk, so her mom had to work full time plus, which meant that my wife had to be the caretaker of the other children and her drunk-@ss dad. There was constant yelling, fighting, and drama. My wife got robbed of being a child and a teenager."
"My parents never divorced, they just loathed each other, and took all of their frustration out on me, the only kid. The only respite I got was school. There were times I wouldn't come home for days because of the screaming and other bullsh*t."
"So, it turns out that my wife and I really enjoy the quiet. Of course we talk, and genuinely have great conversations, but we can go for hours just being comfortably silent together hanging out. We'll sit at opposite ends of the couch, feet touching each other, and just be. I love her, and I love it."
– ka_tet_of_one
Some things just take some getting used to.
And being married and adusting to one another's quirks is no exception.
For me, getting married didn't change a thing, since we already ironed out any issues that come with living together.
After 15 years of being in a relationship, my husband and I both said "I do," and nothing dramatically changed for better or for worse.
Maybe there is something to not rushing into things.
When people visit the United States of America for the first time, they often have a list of places to see and things to do (and eat!).
Get a hot dog in New York City before attending a Broadway show, take in the spectacular views of the Grand Canyon, or soak in the sunny beaches of Florida.
Of course, like anywhere on Earth, there are also some places and things which should be avoided at all costs.
Then too, not all guidebooks can give you all the information on things to be wary of in the most visited places in the country.
Some of which might save you a dollar or two, and some of which might actually save your life.
"Americans of Reddit, what places in America should foreigners avoid at all cost?"
Those Signs Are Not Just Decorations
"If you go to a national park and you disregard the signs, you're going to die."
"It's not a joke."
"Treat buffalo like field puppies?"
"You're going to die."
"Try to pet the brown bear?"
"You're going to die."
"See that moose and want to feed it?"
"You're probably already dead."
"Oh look, a rattlesnake! "
"*dead*"
"Want to swim in Old Faithful?"
"You're going to die painfully and completely dissolve into a soup."
"Sh*t is dangerous here and if you don't respect it you'll be lucky to die quick."- Xanza
"If you’re in a National park, listen to what the caution signs say and don’t venture off of paths."
"One is because of wildlife and the other is because humans don’t need to ruin everything in nature, just to get a photo."
"Also, don’t fall into the Grand Canyon." - Yawheyy
grand canyon arizona GIF by Go USA JpGiphyKnow Your Limits And Be Prepared
"Don’t hike into the wilderness of Colorado (especially 14ers) without knowing wilderness survival and responsibilities."
"Tourists die on our mountains and in Rocky Mountain National Park all the time."
"Do your research!"
"Altitude is no joke."- eyjafjallajokul_
Some Things Are Worth The Added Expense...
"Not American but as a visitor trying to travel on the cheap, I made the mistake of booking a greyhound bus ride."
"There's a reason why it was cheap lol."- toadkarter1993
The Name Should Be A Clue
"Death Valley in the summer especially if you consider yourself a strong hiker, and live in a cooler climate."
"It has that name for a reason."- FabFrench
death valley documentary GIFGiphyOr Even Dip Your Toes...
"The hot springs in yellowstone are not hot tubs do not swim in them."- needs_grammarly
"Steaming Acidic hot springs in Yellowstone."- SuvenPan
Every City Has One...
"Anywhere with a Rainforest Cafe and a Wax Museum on the same street is a tourist trap."- Klytus_Im-Bored
homer simpson episode 13 GIFGiphyMaps Exist For A Reason
"Avoid going to one location thinking another location across the country is a short trip."- Jebediah_Vorbeck
So Much For "Brotherly Love"
"The Kensington area of North Philadelphia."
"Don't."
"Just don't."- amhildreth
Even If You're A Night Owl
"Most of Downtown Los Angeles at night."
"When the streets get quiet and the locals go home, that's your cue to go back to your hotel or a more popular hotspot."- muststayawaketonod·
los angeles city GIF by The Broad MuseumGiphyAracnaphobia!
"Pueblo Colorado."- External-Traffic-916
"F*ck Peublo and its mass Tarantula Migration."- paustulio
Not The Where, But The What
"It's not 'places' as much as 'situations' that you should avoid."
"Depending on where you're from, you'll have some of these instincts, but not others."
"It's not all or nothing."
"But here's some situations I can see happening to a European, as an example."
"Getting stranded in the desert."
"Whether you're hiking without water, or driving too far on a single tank of gas, there's a real risk of being stranded without very immediate help, and no cell reception."
"Underestimating travel time."
"You're not going to see NYC and LA on the same trip."
"They're three time zones apart."
"They are exactly as far apart as London, England and Baku, Azerbaijan."
"You'll either be driving for a week, or flying."
"Even things that seem close, like NYC and DC, are not actually that close."
"It would be about 6 hours of driving or train to get from one to the other."
"Trespassing."
"It is taken VERY seriously here, and you could wind up shot if you are on the wrong person's land."
"We do not have the right to roam."
"And we do have the right to bear arms."
"Some states even have 'castle laws' which considers trespassing to be sufficient reason to shoot someone in 'self defense'."
"Any places people are mentioning are places that Americans wouldn't go to either if they could help it."
"But if I can say one place in particular, it would be Camden, NJ."
"It's just across the river from Philadelphia, and has a couple of tourist draws like the Aquarium or the concert venue, but anywhere that's not those specific places is incredibly unsafe."- pHScale
Season 9 Reaction GIF by The OfficeGiphyLike any country, America has its fair share of underwhelming and unsafe destinations.
Thankfully, most of these places aren't written up in guidebooks, and won't be high on the list of any foreign visitors.
Sadly, guidebooks still might not stop them from shelling out loads of money for very mediocre food at a noisy theme restaurant...
Our ancient ancestors had their own habits; some were strange and bewildering, others were nearly identical to those we practice today. Looking back through history, one might be surprised to find the daily lives of the ancients weren't so unrecognizable. But then again, there are still plenty of ancient habits that leave us scratching our heads.
1. Ground-Breaking Discovery
Recently, archaeologists working in Italy’s Caverna delle Arene Candide found a heap of rocks. Not exactly headline news, but these rocks had been carried up from a nearby beach and broken in a consistent, uniform fashion, and similar-sized pieces had been taken from each one. It appears that Neolithic Italians broke the rocks as a funerary rite—the rocks themselves may have represented lost loved ones, and breaking them symbolized the person dying.
2. Shake On It
person holding hands of another personPhoto by Sincerely Media on UnsplashThe tradition of greeting another person by shaking hands dates at least as far back as the Ancient Greeks. One column at the Acropolis even shows the Greek goddess of marriage, Hera, shaking hands with the Greek goddess of wisdom, Athena.
3. A Little Pick-Me-Up
Nowadays we have Viagra and Cialis, but Pliny the Elder suggested a bevy of ancient Roman aphrodisiacs that reads more like a witch’s shopping list than a doctor’s prescription. To put the pep back in your step, Pliny suggested the yolks of pigeon eggs, in honey, mixed with hog’s lard, or sparrows eggs, or a lizard drowned in one’s own urine. If that didn't work, you could always wear “the right testicle of a cock.” I’ll pause long enough for you to stop giggling.
4. For The Ladies
brown falcon on treePhoto by Photos By Beks on UnsplashGot it out of your system? Ok, moving on: For ladies with low libido, Pliny advised ingesting a vulture’s tongue, or wearing a patch of wool soaked in bat’s blood on top of the head. It seems so obvious, doesn't it?
5. Just ’Browsing
Nothing made a Greek woman feel more attractive than having a thick, swarthy unibrow. To the Greeks, the unibrow signaled a combination of beauty and brains. Greek women would go to great lengths to get that perfect forehead mustache, lining their brows with kohl or soot, or even using tree resin to affix fake eyebrows made of goats’ hair to their foreheads.
6. Of Corset Was!
white and brown striped textilePhoto by Jamie Coupaud on UnsplashYou probably associate the fitted corset with those breathless Victorian women who, though they maintained their figure, looked constantly on the verge of fainting, but they weren't the first to wear them. The corset goes all the way back to the Ancient Minoan women of Crete, who wore similar restrictive bodices. The Minoan corsets were likely the first fitted garments ever worn.
7. To Be Taken With A Grain Of Salt
Popular superstition states that, if one should spill some salt, one can counteract the bad luck by throwing a pinch of salt over the shoulder. That practice actually goes all the way back to the ancient Assyrians. The superstition was passed on from them to the Egyptians, and then the Greeks, and the Romans, all the way to today.
8. Stairway To Heaven
an egyptian scene with a man offering a bowl to a womanPhoto by British Library on UnsplashThe same is true of walking under ladders—the Egyptians came up with that one. Because a ladder leaning against a wall formed a triangle, representative of the holy trinity of Egyptian gods, to walk through was considered sacrilegious. Naturally, that superstation lent itself perfectly to the early Christians. I always just thought it was because you're likely to get something dropped on you if you walk under a ladder.
9. As It Nappens
Just like the Spaniards with their customary siesta, the Ancient Greeks would insist on taking a quick mid-day nap throughout the summer. One 5th-century medical text advised that a brief nap around noon kept the body from “drying out.”
10. That Sucks!
In ancient Ireland, one showed submission to tribal kings by sucking their nipples. Bog-bodies (ancient remain found well-preserved by the chemicals in a bogs) have been found with slashed nipples, indicating that they had been driven from the throne.
11. Pour One Out
Even if you're completely out of touch, you’ve probably seen a rapper “pouring one out” in a music video. Feel free to pour one out in memory of Pac or Biggie, but you should know the practice actually began with the Ancient Egyptians, who first spilled their drinks as a tribute to their god of death, Osiris.
12. The Good Book
person's hand holding book pagePhoto by Rod Long on UnsplashThe practice of libations was continued by the Greeks. There is even mention of “pouring one out” in the Old Testament: Genesis 35:14 states “Jacob set up a pillar in the place where he had spoken with him [God], even a pillar of stone. He poured out a drink offering on it and poured oil on it.”
13. Beer For Breakfast
While the pharaohs had no shortage of delicacies to choose from—fruit and honey and wine and cured fish and all manner of roasted beasts—the Egyptian working class had a significantly shorter menu. The typical Egyptian breakfast consisted of bread, beer, and onions.
14. Sand Gets Everywhere
a group of people riding horses in a desertPhoto by Veronika Biró on UnsplashAnd sand. Lots of sand. Keeping sand out of their food was a huge problem for Egyptians, and coupled with their rough, fibrous diet and the fact that they had no real culture of dental hygiene, it meant that Egyptians of modest means usually suffered severe dental issues.
15. Chickening Out
Roman navies always kept chickens on board their ships, but they never intended to eat the birds. Rather, the chickens were offered cake. If the chickens pecked the cake, the Romans were sure to have luck in their upcoming battle. One Roman admiral, furious that his chicken wouldn’t peck, shunned superstition by throwing his chicken overboard and declared, “If it won’t eat, it can drink instead!”
27. The Stash
green palm tree during sunsetPhoto by Kym MacKinnon on UnsplashAccording to Herodotus, certain tribes to the east liked to throw bushels of marijuana on bonfires and enjoy a nice stone. As with a lot of stuff that Herodotus said, historians took this with a grain of salt, but in 2008 archaeologists discovered the tomb of a 2,700-year-old mummy in the Western Chinese province of Xinjiang.
In addition to the mummy—presumably, a shaman of the Yuehzi people—was nearly 800 grams of marijuana, worth about $8,000 to modern consumers. Also found in the tomb, a stack of Bob Marley records and a poster bearing the phrase “Legalize It.”
17. A Different Period
To cope with severe menstrual symptoms, Roman women used tampons soaked in opium, while Egyptian men were allowed—and even encouraged—to take time off work to care for their menstruating wives or daughters.
18. Don’t Sweat It
gray concrete building during daytimePhoto by Federico Di Dio photography on UnsplashAfter a big day at the Colosseum, Roman fight-goers liked to celebrate the trip by buying souvenirs. Gladiator sweat was a favorite, as was lard from the animals who had been killed during the show. The sweat was mixed with olive oil and sold as a perfume. It was also considered a powerful aphrodisiac. I'll pass, thanks.
19. Decisions, Decisions
According to Herodotus, the rule of thumb among the Ancient Persians was if something was decided upon while drunk, all people involved must wait until they’ve sobered up, and decide again. Later writers added that, if something were decided while sober, the Persians would again put the decision under scrutiny by getting drunk and seeing if the idea held up. At least they covered all their bases!
20. Puking Party
girl in grey tank top holding purple flowerPhoto by Дмитрий Хрусталев-Григорьев on UnsplashAs everyone knows, the Romans loved to party, but of course one can only party so much. The idea of any Roman feast was to eat and drink as much as physically possible. When a Roman began to feel too full, or too drunk, it was socially acceptable, and even encouraged, to induce vomiting, thereby making room for more.
It should be said, however, that it's a misconception that they had special rooms called "vomitoria" for this purpose. Vomitoria did exist, but they were special passages in theaters or auditoria designed to efficiently allow many people to exit at once. The name comes from the Latin word vomo, which means "to spew forth."
21. No Pants Allowed
The Greeks and Romans had pants, they just didn’t wear them. The Greeks thought they looked silly, and the Romans considered them “for the barbarians,” since they were customarily worn by Germanic peoples to the north.
22. Spitting Image
man spitting waterPhoto by Asael Peña on UnsplashIt wouldn’t be unusual to see a Roman spit on himself; it was something they did any time they encountered a mentally ill person or someone with epilepsy. Not only were these traits undesirable, they were considered contagious as well. By spitting on himself, a Roman was protecting himself from the spread of a disease—an action that had no basis, even in Roman medicine, but remained a widely held superstition.
23. The Cure-All
For everything that spitting couldn’t cure, the Romans swore by "theriac." The compound, invented by Nero’s personal physician, was made of 64 different ingredients, including opium and viper flesh, and was said to cure everything from poisoning to plague. Theriac remained a common item in apothecaries and pharmaceutical shops well into the 19th century, because if nothing works anyway, you might as well eat some snake parts.
24. Ancient Times
grayscale photo of round analog clockPhoto by Timo C. Dinger on UnsplashPunctual Romans carried around portable sundials, not unlike our more modern pocket watches. Each sundial came with specific instructions on how to use it based on one’s geographical coordinates and the season. But the Romans didn’t rely on a regular 60 minute hour like we do: rather, they followed the Egyptian example of keeping a 45 minute hour through the summer and a 75 minute hour in the winter. How could that not have confused people?
25. Fast Food
The Romans were a busy, on-the-go people, so it’s not surprising that, just like us moderns, they loved fast food. There were restaurants all over the Rome, many of them with windows that opened onto the street so customers could just order their food and go. I wonder if they had drive-thru windows for chariots?
17. Pompeiians Can’t Cook
brown and white concrete buildingPhoto by Yaopey Yong on UnsplashThere were more than 200 take-out restaurants in Pompeii alone. Taking dinner out was so common that many Pompeiian homes didn’t even have kitchens.
16. Vend Diagram
The Romans even had vending machines. Or at least they had the technology—the only known example, built by Roman-Egyptian inventor Hero of Alexander, was coin-operated and dispensed holy water.
28. Cone Heads
brown concrete statue of manPhoto by Tom Podmore on UnsplashLong before the spray bottle was invented, the Egyptians developed a unique way to apply perfume. They wore tall cones of resin or ox fat on the top of their heads. The cones would be infused with aromatic oils and myrrh. As the balmy night wore on, the cones melted, leaving the Egyptians coated in fragrant oil. It was considered good hospitality to offer these cones to guests at a party.
29. The Best Part Of Waking Up…
Coffee came from Africa, tea from the far east. Neither seemed to have caught on among the Romans. Given the dearth of caffeinated beverages, the Romans began their mornings with a beverage made of goat feces and vinegar. I'll stick to my bean juice, thanks.
30. Just Do It
File:15-07-05-Schloß-Caputh-RalfR-N3S 1528.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgAccording to Pliny the Elder (this guy again...), the goat dung and vinegar beverage was especially popular among chariot racers; it was kind of like an ancient version of Gatorade. The emperor Nero personally endorsed the drink, saying that it gave him extra strength.
31. Urine Luck
The Romans used human urine in industries like leather tanning, and some of these companies even paid a “urine tax” for the privilege. But that’s not all: Urine was used by the Romans as a laundry detergent, a fertilizer, and even as a mouthwash. Because, you know, nothing makes your mouth cleaner than...
32. A Brush With The Egyptians
blue and white plastic bottlePhoto by 莎莉 彭 on UnsplashIn this instance, at least, the Egyptians were centuries ahead of the Romans, and even ahead of pre-20th century Westerners. The Egyptians invented the toothbrush, and used it in conjunction with a toothpaste made of gum arabica, soot, and water that actually would have done an OK job.
33. Mint Condition
In fact, one 4th century Egyptian text offers a complete—though different—recipe for toothpaste: one drachma of rock salt, one drachma of iris flowers, 20 grains of pepper, and, of course, two drachmas of mint for kissably fresh breath. Hey, if it's not human urine, I'll take it!
34. Getting Around To It
man and woman statue under blue sky during daytimePhoto by Sergio García on UnsplashLet’s talk about bad habits for a minute. Here in the modern world, many of us have trouble getting motivated—we tend to put off starting things, even if they’re important or good for us. But don't feel so bad, even our ancient ancestors struggled with procrastination.
Putting off crucial business was so common in Ancient Greece that the Greeks had a word for it: akrasia, “the state of acting against one’s own interest.”
35. So Stupid, It’s Smart
One Greek statesman discovered a trick to help him defeat akrasia: Demosthenes shaved one side of his head (seriously). Funny, but how does it help? Demosthenes reasoned—rightly, perhaps—that he would be less tempted to go outside if he knew people would make fun of his stupid haircut. Rather than risk the mockery and taunts of his fellow Athenians, he stayed home and studied. Something to remember next time you’ve got a big exam coming up.
36. Moldy Medicine
sliced bread on tablePhoto by Helena Yankovska on UnsplashThe Ancient Egyptians applied moldy bread crusts to burns. This practice has also been found in ancient Greek, Chinese, and Serbian cultures. While none of these ancient cultures had any way to know specifically, they did seem to intuit that the microbes and antibodies active in the mold were good for fighting off infections.
37. An Eyebrow Raising Habit
Eyebrows were important to the Ancient Egyptians, as well. The death of a household cat was a serious tragedy—the Egyptians literally worshipped the furry felines—and families would often demonstrate their grief by shaving their eyebrows off.
38. The Cat’s Pyjamas
Free Images : animal, monument, statue, cat, egypt, sculpture ...pxhere.comCats were idolized by the Egyptians because of their skill at killing vermin like rats and snakes, and because they also represented fertility. When a cat died, even the cat of a laborer, it was given a noble burial, mummified, and laid to rest surrounded by pots of milk and mummified mice. We should all be so lucky.
39. Pretty Disrespectful
The practice of mummifying cats was so common that, over the course of the 19th century, British industrialists were able to import nineteen tons of mummified kitties for use as fertilizer.
40. Not Monkeying Around
black monkey sitting on rock during daytimePhoto by Benjamin Ong on UnsplashCats weren’t the only pets loved by the Egyptians; they were also known to keep monkeys. Big monkeys. Really big monkeys, like baboons, in fact. Baboons don’t live in Egypt—they had to be imported to Egypt specifically—but their popularity led them to develop a wealth of cultural and religious significance to the Egyptian people, and one was considered lucky indeed to have one of the simians in their home.
41. The Hogs Of War
The Greeks and Romans employed an unlikely ally when they went to war: Because their rivals in the east typically employed elephants, the Greeks and Romans enlisted the help of war pigs, whose squeals terrified the giant beasts.
42. The Romans Treated Their Kids Like Garbage
a statue of a person holding a staffPhoto by Clemens van Lay on UnsplashRoman families did have adoption practices—even Julius Caesar adopted his great-nephew Octavian, later known as Augustus—but it was mostly a way for the wealthy Roman elite to ensure they had an heir. For poorer families, unwanted children were often just left at the dump.
If those unwanted babies didn’t die, they were usually taken to be raised as slaves.
Where do babies come from?
One of life's greatest mysteries.
Or one of life's most solid truths.
But when we're young, we don't know all of the details.
But that doesn't mean there aren't questions.
Oh, the number of questions and curiosities.
Redditor DramaticChoice4 wanted to discuss the stork's journey, so they asked:
"How did you use to think babies were made?"
So Random
Im Pregnant Mama Said GIF by OriginalsGiphy"I thought it was like an illness, you just randomly come down with pregnancy once you're married."
cb1216
The Egg
"My friends and I had a pretty solid worldview on this A man down the street from us was rumored to have 1 testicle. This man also had 1 kid So, we deduced that when you want to have kids, the man fires a testicle into the woman, and that testicle acted as 'the egg.'"
"We realized that this would be painful for the man, but that it would also make it 'fair' since we figured that giving birth must be painful as well We couldn't figure out why some families had more than 2 kids, but that was a problem for another day."
sneekeemonkee
Home Invasion
"I thought they would just appear. Like they spawned somewhere in the house."
"No, they had to love each other very much and concentrate on that for it to happen. At least that’s the explanation I had given myself as a small child."
"Then I learned that women get pregnant, but in the dialect of the region around Venezia (Italy) where I grew up, it is common to say 'I’m buying a baby' when you’re pregnant. So I thought there was an actual place you went to purchase pregnancy... lol."
millennium-popsicle
Hold Me
"Through cuddling. My parents had me watch a movie about the facts of life. It showed a man and a woman cuddling on the couch in one scene, and then in the next, the narrator was talking about how an egg is fertilized. So, the implication was that this happened via cuddling."
Old_Army90
Born That Way
Music Video Mv GIF by Lady GagaGiphy"I don't know. I used to think that my parents were born as parents and I was born as a child, so for 2-3 years I thought that I wasn’t going to age and so my parents."
ChemicalAd1157
Kids. We were so innocent at one time.
Born that way. Cute thought.
Delivery
"Babies are made at a baby factory."
Kotopause
"And delivered by a giant bird. Dumbo (1941) messed me up in so many ways."
MadOrange64
Saliva
"I knew that kissing was involved. I also knew that sperm was involved after watching 'Look Who’s Talking' with my parents (I think there’s a scene showing the sperm traveling to the egg while talking to each other). So my 7-year-old brain assumed that somehow sperm was transferred through the saliva while kissing."
Djent_Reznor1
The Seed
"My mom explained to me that she and my dad helped God make me. So I imagined them traveling to heaven and picking out parts like it was a build-a-bear or something. So then I was very confused when I asked my mom what heaven was like and she said she had never been. I was like, I knew it... I'm adopted."
"I explained to my children (7, 6 & 4) when I was having our 4th last year that mommies have eggs in their bellies, and daddies have a seed. And then the daddy puts the seed in the belly, it goes into the egg and the baby starts growing. They asked how the seed gets in the belly and I told them I would tell them when they are older. I'm pretty sure they think it goes in through the belly button."
spidermom4
Good Faith
Pop Tv Please GIF by One Day At A TimeGiphy"My parents told me that you just had to pray for one and you can be pregnant the next day."
asn-grl
"My mom's friend thought the opposite, she would pray every night not to get pregnant because she thought that she could just get preggers randomly."
HumanHuman_2003
Prayer can only do so much.
But I'm not going to get into that aspect if it all.