It could be nonsense, or it could be gold. Anesthesia inhibits all the senses, including your so-called "filter," so you never know what may just slip out...
Some doctors and nurses have heard very funny things while working on their patients. u/makyael asked them:
Doctors and nurses of Reddit, What is the funniest thing you've heard when a patient was on anesthesia but you couldn't laugh?
Here were some of the best answers.
50. Hey! You! Get Offa My CloudGiphy
Late to the party as usual. I've had my share of decent ones over 15 years of nursing and EMS.
I had a flight medic coworker nearly get a divorce because he confessed to a divorce while profoundly disassociated. I'm 50/50 on whether he was being honest or if he hallucinated a past affair, but they ended up staying together I understand.
I had a medical malpractice lawyer offer his heartfelt apologies for being a med-mal lawyer after he had a few rounds of conscious sedation. That one gave me a good chuckle, but I sure as shit didn't show it while he was in the room.
I've been hit on many, many, many, many, many little old ladies after they get some versed and fentanyl. My wife has been hit on by...well she doesn't need the drugs to get hit on :) (And you young medics out there, go reeeeeeal easy on the versed on the old folks...)
One patient started telling dirty jokes, and didn't stop through the whole case. I actually had to force myself to stop listening so as to maintain my composure and situational awareness. Most were blonde jokes, and she was a late middle-aged blonde woman.
My Mom was an ER RN for decades. One of her favorites was a conscious sedation on a toddler. Mom: "Honey do you know where you are?" Kid: "Yes" Mom: "Where are you?" Kid: "On the cloud...riiiiiiight there (points at ceiling)" Mom to the orthopod: "I think we're good..."
I had a very attractive doc doing the procedure while I sedated. Patient asks us if the hospital only hires attractive people. :) Then the overweight neurologist consult pops his head in as asks if he counts too! Yeah, no stealing our limelight buddy...
Had a patient going in for a urology procedure under general anesthesia. RN goes to prep the groin (i.e. make it super-clean to reduce the risk of infection) and finds a note taped to the inner thigh of the patient. He'd left a note for his urologist! Gave us all a chuckle.
Speaking of thighs, part of my job duties used to include shaving the pubic hair from the hip area because femoral arterial and/or venous access was going to be obtained. (it reduces risk of infection by reducing surface area.). Lots of bikini jokes. Did I mention I get hit on by a lot of old ladies?
There are so many more...they all blur together at this point. These are the ones that really stand out.
49. Make! Out!
I had a bad crash on my dirt bike and where I was was a long way from a hospital so it was about an hour drive in the ambulance (it wasn't serious enough for helicopter or even for them to use the lights and sirens) because it was a long bumpy road they loaded me up with drugs to make me comfortable.
When I was super high I noticed the driver of the ambulance and the paramedic that was tending to me (both males) didn't like eachother very much (or so I thought in my state). I then proceeded to do what felt like an entire doctor Phil episode telling each of them that they need to learn to love eachother and not judge eachother because I like one of them better but I won't tell them which one.
This went on for what must have been half an hour before I finally said "okay so are we all good now?" To which they said laughingly "yes we're all good". To finalize I held up my hands and say "okay good, now kiss" smooshing my hands together.
48. Don't Kill My Vibe, Don't Touch My Weave
Not a nurse.
When I went under for Tonsillectomy when I was 17 I asked for no IV to be put in before they started to put me under with a mask (fear of needles from past trauma).
I think they gave me the IV anyway instead, because as the mask got placed on my face they asked me to sing to them. I sang "O Christmas, Tree" and I remember the nurses laughing.
Next thing I remembered was waking up after and asking when they were actually going to do the procedure, and the nurse kept brushing my bangs out of my face every time she came to check on me....but as a teenage girl my bangs were everything and I kept brushing them back over one eye.
47. Reversal Of Mood
As a teenager I had my wisdom teeth out and my mouth was filled with gauze so I couldn't SAY anything but when I came to I was standing and I was really grumpy so when they told me "This way sweetie" all I could think was "That's where the f*cking door is, DUH you morons!!!"
Fast forward years later and I tell them I wake up grumpy when I'm about to have surgery on my broken arm. They tell me there's not much they can do about that so I'm ready to wake up and be in a sour mood--turns out I woke up and immediately called the nurse closest to me "So beautiful." Ironically, unless she was two inches from my face, I couldn't see her without my glasses. Whatever. She was probably gorgeous but hell if I would have known.
46. Well, That Wasn't The Shield I'd ExpectedGiphy
After my wisdom teeth were removed I woke up in a chair. Looked around then felt my left cheek which was still very very numb. I remember clearly thinking "oh great they put a shield in my face to protect me" and immediately began punching my face. My mom and nurse were both there.
My mom lightly touched my arm and said EJ-DJ don't do that. I flopped my head over to look at her and responded "Mom, iiiiii'm fine" and swung my face over to meet my fist as hard as I could. I did this until my fist and knuckles hurt. I looked at my hand thinking "that's such a strong shield" opened my fist saw my palm and thought "nice" and palmed my face as hard as I could until my shoulder was tired.
I then tried this on the right side of my face but the anesthesia was wearing off so I somewhat felt it and determined that instead of a shield they had just put a rock there to protect me so I stopped.
I later learned the reason my mom didn't do more to stop me was I was 16 years old and she was terrified that if she "disciplined" me I would rebel by doing drugs and shagging prostitutes. Lucky for her my anesthesia high induced self-harm rampage really put me on the straight and narrow and I have neither done drugs nor shagged prostitutes. Thanks Mom
45. This Is Far Too Much Information, Thanks!
Had to perform conscious sedation on this early 40's woman who fell and fractured her wrist while completely sh*t-faced. Her partner who appeared younger than her was by her side during triage and Xray. After reducing her fracture, as she was regaining consciousness told us repeatedly how big her partners c*ck was, and basically various ways she could use it.
44. Rainbow Road
Had to be put under when I broke my arm. When I came to I tried stretching but my left arm was in a cast so when it stopped so did my right arm. I thought I was in a bubble. Thinking this I saw the rainbow colored reflection of light and then thought I was riding down a rainbow yelling WEEEE at the top of my lungs. I got a lot of laughs that night lol.
43. Stacey's Mom's In Love With Me
Had a middle aged mother of three come back to her room. Her husband was sitting in a chair on the other side of the room and she leaned close to me and whispered, "you're a very pretty girl" and winked at me. Hard to hold it together when she continued to come onto me.
42. No Gas Shall Be Passed In MY Colonoscopy
A guy in his 50's came in for a routine colonoscopy. He had "cleaned out" the night before, got fentanyl and versed, and was out. About halfway through, air starts coming out of his bowel in loud farts, as it commonly does, but it wakes him up and he is convinced the doctor is farting during his procedure. He demands him to stop and "have some respect". The doc lightly chuckles and orders another mg Versed.
41. My Own MythosGiphy
I got my wisdom teeth out a while back, and my mom worked from home that day to keep an eye on me. When I came out from anesthesia, I apparently repeatedly told the nurse "I have the best mom ever! She's awesome!" and then trying to tell them her long-*ss fancy job title (I can't do that sober, which gives you an idea of what they were seeing).
When the nurse brought Mom back to see me, I told her a couple of times that I felt like Rip Van Winkle, and that I needed to go back to sleep to fulfill my prophecy.
Then in the car on the way home, I became obsessed with a spot of dirt on my window, and badgered my poor mom into going through the car wash to "get rid of the spot before it steals my soul!"
Yeah...I have no clue what they gave me, but it was some seriously good sh*t.
40. Compliments That Are Out Of Line
I was a patient as well and I had a really bad appendix rupture so I had a drainage bag put in me. I was so hot and just internally f*cked up I don't remember the first 3 days. My mom told me at one point I called my nurse a milf then backtracked saying I wanted some milk (i was 15 at the time).
The nurse was apparently really cool about it and said how that's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to her. Also when I got out of surgery and got on the elevator to go to my floor I guess I was in awe and said "I've read about this place"
39. Frank Zappa Will Do That To Ya
Not a doctor. I had surgery on my butt with general anesthetic. The surgery took place in a private clinic. In the salon we had a TV and the nurses always kept the remote and the TV was set to AMC all the time I was in there. When the surgery was over and I was starting to wake up a nurse brought me back to the salon and put me back on the bed.
I was on cloud 9 and can't remember anything that happened after the surgery. Next day a nurse came to my bed to see if I was ok. I told her that I don't remember anything that happened the night before. She told me I was mesmerized by a movie that was on TV and when she asked me if I needed anything I replied:
"Umm....yeah.....can you give me some morphine?". She said that she cannot do that and asked me why do I need morphine. She said my last words after surgery were "I think I'm not tripping as hard as I need to" and then immediately fell asleep. I found out later that day that the movie was Frank Zappa's 200 Motels.
38. What A Time To Be A Singer
They gave me Vicodin before my Lasik surgery a few years ago. It hit me HARD and it was like I was drunk. I had to wait a few minutes before the procedure room was ready. Apparently I blew up my boyfriends (now husband) phone with texts like "I love you more than wine," and "I can't feel my eyeballs!!" He was in the middle of taking an exam after a training class for work, and my texts were quite the distraction lol
During the procedure, I started singing...and I should add I was a classically trained opera singer in my youth. The song, of my own creation went, "Getting my eyes did, I'm gonna see good! Gonna have eyesight and not be all blind!! No glasses for meeeeeeeee!!!!" After I was asked to stop singing, I go "hey Doc! When you do these things, do you ever make sound effects in your head? Pew pew! Pew! Pew!!"
That's when the doctor told me the procedure room was a no talking zone.
37. Dory Would Be Proud
Im late to this.
But I work in theatre as a scrub nurse. We did an ACL recon on a girl around 22 years old. As she was waking up from the anaesthetic she started making weird moaning noises. We thought something was wrong because her eyes looked worried. Trying to get info out of her went as follows:
"Are you okay? Are you sore?"
Shaking her head "Wooooaaaaaahhhhhh. Whaaaaaaaaaa"
"Are you thirsty?"
"Ill get you a drink when you're a bit more awake. You sound like a whale"
Nodding enthusiastically "whaaaaaaaaa wooooooaaaaahhhhh"
"Are you speaking whale?"
Nodding and smiling "woohh"
45 minutes later when everything wore off she asked if she was making animal noises because she remembers speaking whale.
36. Equal Opportunity, For The Right Ice CreamGiphy
Not a doctor, but I had an upper GI endoscopy done last week. I'm sure I said some funny things, but what I remember during the wake up process is this:
- To one of the other doctors in the room, I remember grabbing his face and telling him some really prophetic things about an Archangel guiding his life path, and that said angel loves him dearly. (I'm pagan, but I guess I'm an equal opportunity prophet?)
- Talking to the anesthesiologist about how Ben and Jerry's discontinued my favorite flavor years ago, Black and Tan, and I really wanted some.
35. Lost That Time (But They Sure Remember)
When I shattered my ankle and leg years ago I received a large dose of Etomidate, which is more of a dissociative drug so they could reduce (set) all the mess in my leg before I had surgery a week later. So I was totally "conscious" throughout the process but do not remember it at all. They told my dad to leave the room because it would be "hard to watch" but like myself he works in EMS so he declined and stayed with me.
One of the nurses and I were having a conversation about something random and I was mid-sentence, and then blink I finish my sentence and everyone looks at me weird. Apparently between the first half of my sentence and the second they had completed the procedure, during which I had screamed obscenities and tossed nurses and my father around the room. But for me, it all happened in an instant and my brain popped right back to where I left off. Pretty cool, but kind of scary to think of just losing time like that.
34. Thank Goodness You Don't Still Support Ron Paul
Not a doctor but when I came out of my operation for wisdom teeth I was extremely high because the root ran deeper than they previously thought and had to keep me under for longer. My mom was cracking up as I professed my love for Ron Paul the entire way home, even saying I wanted to have his children. I am a guy.
This was before I had come to my senses and shifted more to the left, but it is still funny watching me on video.
33. But The Hangover Though
I had jaw surgery at 17 to fix a massive overbite. The anesthesiologist gives me the drugs (whatever it was, gas mask deal). I was a pretty sheltered 17 year old that hadn't been drunk or high yet, and this stuff was a BLAST. I wasn't awake for long, but I remember saying "wwhooooaaaahhh!!!" And shaking my head back and forth, watching the room get swirly.
The last thing I heard:
Surgeon: "I think he likes it."
Anesthesiologist (perfect timing, deadpan delivery): "yeah, it comes in six-packs."
32. Roused By The Baby
Reverse of what you asked. I thought I was hilarious!
Awoke from anesthesia and the nurse asked me where I was. I said "Edmonton" and burst out laughing because I'm from a small town outside of Edmonton.
Nurse, very seriously, "Do you know where you are?"
Me, very seriously, "Yes, I'm in recovery, and you're no fun."
I then burst into laughter again.
Another time, going under, I mumbled, "It does taste like garlic."
I remember the anesthesiologist laughing and I was out.
Third time, again recovery, eight months after having my daughter.
I hear a baby crying and I start thrashing around, trying to wake up. It's like coming up from the bottom of the ocean...
Nurse, "What's wrong?!" while restraining me.
"My baby! I hear my baby crying!"
"Oh, that's a 12 year old boy in the next bed. He just had his tonsils removed."
Poof! I was out again. Apparently motherly instinct is only instinct about your own child when groggy.
31. A Narrative I Wish I Could Un-KnowGiphy
I have 2 from my days as a Naval medic doing my training in a civilian hospital.
The first was a patient that was a professional rugby player undergoing an electric cardioversion. This a a procedure where a person has an abnormal heart rhythm and is put to sleep for just long enough for the heart to be shocked back into a normal rhythm using a defibrillator.
The patient, being a rugby player, was a big man and the and the anesthetist had a long discussion with the surgeon about the amount of anesthetic that should be administered to knock the guy out for just a few minutes. Eventually they came to a decision and administered the anesthetic. The moment that they shocked the patient with the defib he sat bolt upright, looked at the surgeon and screamed "What the f*ck was that?" before flopping back down onto the table, unconscious.
The second was an older lady in her sixties, that was admitted with abdominal pain and bleeding and had been given some fairly strong pain killers and some gas and air that had made her as high as a kite. The Dr I was assisting wanted to carry out a rigid sigmoidoscopy so we asked the husband to stand outside of the curtains while we carried out the procedure.
A rigid sigmoidoscope looks like a dildo with a handle on it (almost in the shape of a gun) the instrument is put up the patients anus and the centre is removed, leaving a hollow tube inside the anus, allowing the dr to see the last part of the sigmoid colon.
As soon as the end of the scope touches the patients *ss she screams "Oh no Derrick!" the Dr, trying hard not to laugh, pushed the scope into the patients backside. The lady then said again "No Derrick, No!" followed by "You know I don't like this Derrick, We only do this when I'm drunk, it's too messy!"
At his point the Dr's shoulders are shaking with the effort of not laughing and the lady follows up with "For god's sake Derrick, just put it in then and get it over with". We all managed to maintain our professionalism and composure but when we opened the curtains for her husband to be allowed back in Derrick had gone for a walk.
30. Repetitive Requests
When I had my very very impacted wisdom teeth removed, I asked the nurse to punch me in the face while my face was still numb.
"I wont feel it I promise."
"I'm not punching you in the face. Please stop asking."
29. Close Calls
My step-daughter and I had a . . . complicated . . . relationship. I came into her life when she was a young teen and, for a while there, she was wary of me. She thought I was going to keep her mom away from her (I didn't) or that I was trying to replace her bio dad (I wasn't).
When it came time for her to have her wisdom teeth out, she had the whole conscious sedation thing and her mom and I brought her home. I still have a video of her being very concerned that she left her tongue at the dentist's office and me telling her that I would go get it as soon as she finished her shake.
But the thing that still gives me chills is when, later that day, she was complaining that there was something on her (apparently now returned) tongue. She was trying to reach into her mouth to get it out and her mom called me into her bedroom to hold her hands while her mom looked in her mouth. I did and her mom turned to me and said, "Oh my god, there really is something on her tongue."
I told her to take it out and she said she couldn't. So I had to. Ummmmm, ok.
I look into her mouth and it looks like there's clear fishing line on her tongue. I hesitantly reach in, grab it and gently pull it from her mouth, hoping that it wasn't attached to anything. It wasn't.
28. This Time It Wasn't The Sedated One
I was an OR nurse for several years. Anesthesia was started as soon as the patient hit the holding room to help relax them. I was taking care of this old guy (70s) when his much, much younger wife proceeded to tell him all the secrets she had been hiding. She wrecked the car, had an affair, blah blah blah.
He just nodded. She informed me that she had been waiting for the exact time to disclose all of this info because she knew her sugar daddy wasn't going to remember anything. Well played. Well played.
27. Puns On Puns On Puns
Apparently I said this, they told my wife.
Me: Woken up after back surgery
5 mins later:
Me: Is she ok?
Me: That actress who was stabbed
Nurse: Really, who??
Me: I don't know...Reese somebody
Me: No, with a knife!
Me: Laugh like a hyena for 5 mins
26. The Queen Would Be Proud
I woke up unable to remember my native language, so I switched over to English, like with a proper British accent and everything. My dentist commented that maybe he should go under as well because he'd always wanted to learn French. My mother eventually got scared it wouldn't wear off and refused to talk to me until it did.
25. Rocket LauncherGiphy
I'll preface this by saying that I don't like hospitals... especially when I'm the patient.
I went in for a colonoscopy and was given Propofol and whatever for pain. I'm a complete drug wimp so fell asleep in about 2 seconds. When it was over, I was being taken to recovery and I kind of woke up. I said, "Am I done? Can I go home?" and the nurse said, "you can't go home until you pass gas so that we know all of the air is out of your intestines."
I thought, "right, then... " and as I was being wheeled into the little recovery bay (with curtains, not walls), I pushed as hard as I could.
Simultaneously my husband stood up and said, "hey, ba---" and I farted so loudly and for so long that I almost launched myself into the next room. I heard my husband bellow, "JESUS CHRIST!" and then I heard some laughter from somewhere else.
I said, "I'm ready to go home!" and passed back out while my husband stood there looking around in confusion about what had just happened. I've never heard the end of this.
24. Because I Got High
When sending my patient to sleep, we were giving the drugs via the IV he said "you'll have to give me lots of that stuff" (referring to the drugs). Worried I said "why?" Thinking he an undisclosed allergy or condition we hadn't known about, instead he said as he fell asleep "because I smoke weeeeeeeeeee". Difficult to keep a straight face!
23. Got Lost In This Game
I have epilepsy and we have a fugue state after our seizures where we're confused and loopy but it's also blacked out in our heads so I don't remember this at all.
Apparently, in the ambulance after the seizure I was singing Britney Spears "Oops I did it again" in reference to seizing again. The EMT's found it so funny that they made sure to tell me about it once I was in the hospital and awake enough to remember.
Then a few weeks later I got a package with a Britney Spears CD in it and a post it note saying "Seize the moment. But seriously, take your medicine."
22. ANY, Mom.
I have type 1 diabetes, so any time I'm anesthetized, a lot of concern is directed at low blood sugar. My wisdom teeth surgery was done as the first of the day (to avoid fasting as much as possible) and after I woke up, they made me drink a glass of juice. I chugged it and then raised both my fists in the air and said loudly "I didn't spill ANY."
I'm still pretty proud of that, numb mouth, half out of it and with fewer teeth than normal? That's skill.
I was also sure my anesthesia wasn't actually working the first time I went under. They pushed it into my arm, I hung out for a few, and then looked at the nurse and said "I don't think it worked, I don't feel any different," but she just kind of glanced at me and they wheeled me off anyway.
I objected once more and then concluded I was just going in dry and shouted "Alright fine BRING IT ON". And then suddenly I was wearing gauze underpants in a different room and a nice nurse handed me a ginger ale and asked me to rate my pain on a scale of 1-10.
This is what I remember:
According to all witnesses what actually happened following the drug push was as follows: I lolled my head towards the nurse, struggled to focus, said "Uh duh finkus wording", she patted my hand and told me I would be fine, I grunted a bit when they took away my stuffed lion (may or may not have been drooling at this point), and then I just let out a strange whoop-holler and went out like a light.
21. Comparisons And List
Peds ED doc here. We do tons of sedations and ketamine is our drug of choice. I usually warn parents/family about the side effects and I've never had anyone truly get mad when their kid said something under the influence. Some swearing, some very intense discussions about Pokemon, etc. It's pretty common. But my two favorites?
I had a teenager who was with his mom and his girlfriend. He kept going on and on about how sexy his girlfriend was. To her complete humiliation and his mom's utter amusement. I walked in and he said, "Doc, you are SO SEXY!! But, no offense, my girlfriend is MUCH SEXIER!" Thanks, dude!
Then there was a pre-teen boy who dreamed he went to another country (I tell kids they can pick the dreams and it usually works). I ask him if he went and he nodded in awe. Asked what he like best and he said, still awestruck, "The women!" (Complete with hands cupped in front of his chest). His dad laughed so hard he fell to the floor.
20. Be Prepared For Secrets
Nurse in the ER, we do conscious sedations for broken bones or chest tubes and stuff. We make sure to remove all family from the room prior to sedating because patients really do say some pretty bad stuff.
One was a kid who came out to all the staff and he had never told anyone before.
The other was a woman who talked about the sexual troubles with her husband and how they were having marital troubles.
19. Makin' Friends
My wisdom teeth extraction. I woke up crying and the doctor/nurses were really concerned...until I told them I was crying because I missed my wisdom teeth. They enjoyed that one.
I then proceeded to point at the light switch and ask them to turn the radio on, and ask the nurse if the doctor was a good guy because I wanted to invite him to my birthday party. I was probably 16.
18. Blunt And To The Point
When I had surgery on my ankle, I apparently got my Dr to laugh, and some of the nurses after the surgery to laugh.
So, they gave me a shot of something to numb me up or do something important before they actually put me to sleep. I remember up the point where they gave me a second shot. After the second shot, my Dr told me to count backwards from 10. Apparently I just looked at him and said "No need!" And passed the out.
After the surgery when I was waking up, but still pretty out of it, the nurses brought my dad back to help get me ready to go. When I saw him, I yelled "You're not my mom!" To which he replied "I'm your dad, dummy." Apparently that was the best thing the nurses had heard all day.
17. Too Much Detail
My husband had his wisdom teeth out and while under sedation he told the Dr and the nursing staff that he couldn't wait to get me home and into bed. Rather explicitly. It was hilarious.
Also the dentist had the same name as a famous male adult film star. I was waiting for him to make a joke about that but he was shuffled out pretty quick once he started talking about our sex life.
16. Bridge The Gap
When my father went under for the removal of several teeth, he woke up he reveled an almost encyclopaedic knowledge of bridges, which he revealed to the cab driver. I have never heard of him talking about them before or after but he was confident enough to name his top ten bridges and their engineers.
15. Strange Feelings
After getting my wisdom teeth taken out, the nurse waiting for me to wake up told my mom that when I opened my eyes I sat up immediately and asked for my teeth (I asked the doc prior if I could keep them and he said he'd leave them in a baggie so she was going to give it to me anyway lmao). Was brought out to a waiting area so she could have my mom come get me, I guess someone else was there and I very proudly showed this stranger my bagged teeth, then passed out again.
She told my mom it wasn't uncommon for people to ask if they can keep their teeth but she'd never seen someone be that desperate to have them, she also made it a point to say I kept putting the baggie up to my face and getting a very serene smile lol.
My daughter had tubes in her ears on what was apparently "hemorrhoid day". All the other recovery rooms were full of loudly flatulating patients, one of whom would scream "Help! I'm dying!" after every fart.
13. Ball Game
Coming out of my C-section, higher than a hippie at Woodstock, I was presented with my beautiful newborn son. I declared, "Oh my God, his scrotum is HUGE!" and then laughed hysterically.
In my defense, it really was.
12. Grand Theft... Appendage?
Funny story when I got my wisdom teeth out I was CONVINCED they removed my tongue too so when I got home I was stomping around angry telling my dad to prove his loyalty and "get my tongue back"
11. L'Shana Tovah
You can always laugh or smile. The OR is not some serious stoic place, and some people are hilarious while sedated.
I gave ketamine as part of a cocktail of IV drugs to this obese, middle aged Caucasian guy who began loudly singing in Hebrew in the OR during his hemorrhoidectomy under spinal anesthesia. For like 15 minutes.
We all enjoyed the very surprising live entertainment.
10. Vroom Vroom Vroom
Work in an ER.
Anytime we have to do a closed reduction of any joint (shoulder, ankle, knee, etc) we give some Etomidate or Ketamine. We had a 16-year-old who dislocated his shoulder, so we discussed using Ketamine which both he and his parents were agreeable to. After administering it and reducing the joint, the patient started to come down.
He began making "race car" noises by yelling VROOM VROOOOOM and making it sound like he is shifting gears in his car. His mother said that he recently bought his first car, and has been excited about driving it for a long time. The car was a Kia Soul lol.
9. Monkey In The Middle
Nurse here. Not under anesthesia but I had a patient with ICU delirium who said "how did that monkey get in here" while pointing at the ground. She also asked me why I was kissing said monkey. I couldn't help but bust out laughing while politely reminding her there was in fact no monkey.
8. Testing My Patience
This was 2011 and I was 17 and a huge Tiger Woods fan. I was out for either a spinal tap or a bone marrow aspirate. When I was waking up my family had come into my hospital room and I was still feeling the heavy effects of ketamine. A physicians assistant came into the room knowing she could get me riled up for a laugh and she asked, "How do you feel about Phil Mickelson?" In front of my family that had never heard me swear before I very loudly and and angrily say, "Phil Mickelson's the worst"
7. The Price Ain't Right
I'm a nurse, working in ER.
We gave ketamine to a 7yr old to reduce a horribly fractured arm. When she started to come down, she began howling like a wolf. Loud!
Another older lady we gave fentanyl & propanol & she launched into a monologue about how handsome Bob Barker is, and her fantasies about him. We didn't ask when she fully woke up. Best to let some things slide.
Patient here - when I was 14 I had a sports related injury to my elbow and had to have surgery. When I woke up, the nurse was helping me put on my sports bra and all I kept saying was "DON'T LOOK AT MY BOOBS" over and over.
And then i apparently explained to her why i had huge holes in my ears (gauges) and all i said was "you wouldn't let me wear my earrings today"
5. Hit Me
Paramedic, wife is RN. I pretty much knew my entire OR team for foot surgery. They do a spinal, so I'm awake, but completely numb, nipples down.
Anesthesia Doc asks if I want some sedation, I say no. He says, "Are you sure? You seem nervous."
Me: "I don't feel nervous, why would you say that?"
AD: "Look at your vital signs."
Yeah, I was nervous. Heart rate over 110 (normal resting is 60). BP 150/90ish (my normal is normal - 120/80ish). Basically, I'm ramped up. So I said, "yeah, those numbers are WAY out for me, hit me."
And he did. Let me tell you, I totally understand benzo addiction. Next thing I know, my whole body feels like a warm hug from the inside. I'm happy, and calm. I can't adequately describe how wonderful and relaxing this feels, despite hearing the Ortho Doc sawing, and hammering, and chiseling my foot.
I look at my vitals: pulse of 56, BP 110/60ish. And I feel like I'm cuddling a million puppies.
Me, in a soft, sing-songy voice (maybe even whiny): "Dr. Wonka?" (not his real name)
Anesthesia Doc: "Yes, tarhoop?"
Me: "What did you give me?!"
AD: "Versed. Why? Do you need some more?"
Me: "Nah, just checked my numbers, they look good, I was just wondering what you gave me."
AD: "Why, is something wrong? Any side effects?"
Me: "Oh no, nothing like that. I just want to make sure it's charted that, I LOVE VERSED!"
(not so much shouted as, perhaps, proclaimed in an enthusiastic fashion)
My Ortho Doc had to put down his tools and take a giggle break, along with the rest of the OR staff.
4. Rum Rum Rum Rum
For my wisdom teeth removal I was put on laughing gas, I can remember most of what happened. I would keep waking up to myself saying things in response to the dentist or just randomly.
At first they gave me something that tasted like pineapples and the laughing gas. I woke up to myself having said, "Ew tastes like it has rum in it" and both of the dentists dying laughing. Mind you I was 16.
I also kept waking up to me laughing and the dentist cracking jokes.
Also since the dentists were friends of my dad's they asked things about my dad. I dont remember exactly what things were asked.
3. Melania Can Come
Dental assistant - when I was on rotation through an oral surgeon's office a patient was coming around after anesthesia. She looked at the pulse reader on her finger and thought it was an engagement ring. The other assistants joked and told her that the anesthesiologist proposed, and the girl sighed dramatically.
She said, "Are you sure it wasn't Joe Biden? I think it would be him... we wouldn't invite Trump to the wedding though... but his wife can come." She then called every one of her contacts with FaceTime talking about how much she loved them. Totally unforgettable.
2. Not For Home Use
Anesthesiologist here. Not so much heard as seen. When protocol first came out, it had an interesting side effect when used with midazolam (versed, like Valium) in a small subset of young women. They'd wake up with some pretty intense dreams. It was a bit weird when seeing it for the first few times before it was reported in our literature.
There was one young attractive and nervous woman I'd given a strong sedative to on the way to the OR. When we got there, in front of the 4 people in the room, she sat up, took her gown off and drunkenly asked if we liked her breasts. We all politely stopped what we were doing, looked at her and said yes. She smiled and thanked us as she'd just had implants done. Besides that, most patients remarked they'd like to have some of my meds at home. I'd just laugh and say nope, see you next time.
1. An Insult From Shakespeare
Not a nurse (yet!) but when I was 15, I went in for a tonsillectomy.
Apparently, I started freaking the hell out. I bawled that the doctor was going to drop the scalpel and pierce my trachea and kill me. This is while we're all chilling out in triage. Not even started yet.
The nurse came over, put something in my IV to calm me down.
Evidently, I started spilling my guts about a recent party I'd gone to, wherein my BFF at the time had tried to get me to play 7 minutes in Heaven with a boy I liked.
It started to wear off, as we were in triage for quite a while, and my parents promptly asked for more and asked me if there was anything else I'd like to confess to.
As much as we'd like to assume spirits, ghosts, and paranormal happenings are relegated to movies and books, plenty of real-life stories abound.
Inexplicable sightings, things heard, and cold pockets of air are encountered by plenty of people all the time.
It's up to you if you want to believe them. But it's hard to argue with the conviction of the contributors to a recent Reddit thread.
Redditor ihadanightmarewithu asked:
"What is the scariest / paranormal story you have ever experienced?"
Many people talked about the things that caught their eye once upon a time.
Two Places At Once
"I was staying with a group of friends rock climbing in Spain. Really creepy air bnb, lots of strange things happened while we were staying there. The creepiest was one morning we were getting ready for the day, packing food and generally getting our things together, and I went upstairs to grab something."
"As I was heading back downstairs I walked past my friend's boyfriend on the landing and saw him turn and go into his and my friend's room; I think I asked him something but he didn't reply. I thought 'rude' and headed downstairs."
"Walked into the kitchen and he was there sorting food out with my friend."
"Everyone swore he'd been downstairs the whole time, plus there was only one staircase and it would have been impossible for him to overtake me and get to the kitchen before me without me noticing. I went back upstairs and checked their room and there was no one up there but me."
"I've never experienced anything creepy or inexplicable before we stayed in that air bnb and I'd say I'm v. sceptical about supernatural/paranormal stuff but multiple things happened on that trip that spooked me."
"A floating head."
"I was putting beef in the slow cooker because I wanted it done for morning, it was late at night. I reached up to grab some seasonings, and heard creaking. I told my kids to get in bed."
"I see something out of my peripheral vision and there was no body but a head of a bald, pale man floating 3 1/2 maybe 4 feet off the ground in the middle of the floor. It's face kept looking as if it was sad, or like it was begging. It locked eyes with me....I froze."
"I had a darker wall, with a coat rack with my husbands work jackets so it stood out like a store thumb. I looked away thinking it was my imagination but when I looked back it was still there so I ran out the back door because I'd have to pass it to get upstairs with my husband and kids."
"I ended up calling him on my phone to come walk me in. I was wide awake, not sleepy, not out of it, on no medication. I have no reason to see that ever."
Presences, Seen and Felt
"When I was a kid my mom took my sister and I on vacation. I only remember this happening one night while we were there but the hotel we stayed at was pretty much all flats with one bedroom. I slept in the bed with my mom and my sister was on the pull out sofa. I can't remember if I was trying to go to sleep or woke up in the night to this but I just know everyone else was asleep."
"It was really dark with just a little light from the street outside coming in on the sides of the curtains. On each side of the bed stood a black silhouette and it felt like they were all staring right at me acknowledging their presence. I didn't feel threatened or afraid of them at all and turned on the bedside light and not surprisingly nobody was there."
"I turned the light back off and there they were still in the same positions. I just looked at them for a while but must have eventually fell asleep. The only other detail of that experience I remember is waking up the next day and mentioning it at breakfast and my sister saying she felt like she was being watched the whole night. I have no explanation for it but it's a memory that has stuck with me over many years now."
"One time I was going home in my car and saw a guy that appeared to have no arms no hair and a longa** neck in a JUST a hoodie no pants no underwear trying to climb a tree in the woods with their legs and idk know if that's paranormal but it was such a fu**ing weird experience that I think it qualifies"
For others, it was all about the things they heard.
"This is something I've never been able to rationalize."
"For months after my dad died, we were getting landline calls where no one would answer on the other end. This was in 2002, so, while robo callers were a thing, it definitely wasn't as prevalent as it is today, but we did assume they were probably wrong numbers or something. (We didn't have any phones that displayed caller id at the time.)"
"Well, one time, after getting yet another call with only silence on the other end, I jokingly said, 'Dad, if that's you, call my cell phone.' "
"I want to preface this by saying I rarely ever got calls on my cell phone, and never spam calls in those days. I was 18 with an unlisted number that only my family and a few friends had."
"Just a few minutes later, my phone rang with a number I'd never seen before. With what I'd just said fresh in my mind, I kind of freaked out and didn't answer. I was on my way out to go somewhere with my mom, so when we got in the car, I told her what happened. We made the decision to call the number back."
"It never rang, but there was activity at the other end: muffled static and the sound of numbers being dialed slowly. It was the weirdest thing. Both my mom and I said hello, but no one ever answered."
"Has anyone ever had something like that happen to them when dialing a number? I've never had it happen before or since."
And the Crying Stopped
"About 10 years ago (I'd have been 24) I was still living with my parents. My bedroom was in the basement. One night, around 3am I was woken up to the sounds of a young child crying. It sounded like it was coming from just outside my window. I couldn't just look out the window because it was covered in ivy, so I quickly hopped out of bed to go help the kid."
"As I got closer to my bedroom door I could hear the crying was actually on the other side of the door. I opened the door. No one is there and the crying stopped. Spooked, I immediately jumped back in bed and the crying started again."
"Later that day at dinner, my family was sitting around the table and I brought up my experience I had. One of my sisters told a story about how when she was a kid she'd always leave her room at night to go sleep with my parents because she'd see a little girl walking out of her closet."
"As she left her room and got to my parents' door waiting to be let in because the door was locked she'd see the little girl walking up the stairs that were right there. After her telling this story my youngest sister looked scared and asked, 'the little girl, is she wearing a pink nightgown with shoulder-length brunette hair?' "
"Now my other sister was scared because that is exactly who she saw. My youngest sister told how she had similar experiences with that little girl coming out of the closet at night or walking up the stairs at night."
"I'm convinced that something happened either in that house before we moved in or on that land that my parents' house was built on."
Crying From Afar
"Not my story but my moms, apparently when I was just a baby I was always a calm sleeper and once when my mom was having a friend over downstairs they could hear a baby crying so they naturally went to check on me and I was still calmly asleep..."
"...but every time they went back downstairs they could hear some more crying, but apparently the crying was somehow off in a different way as well, one day when mom and dad were downstairs watching tv while I was sleeping upstairs, they heard crying and finally pinpointed the thing that was off..."
"...apparently it came from the opposite side of the house compared to my room and that room had the latch to the attic. Creepy stuff, but I'm not that surprised. This place is totally haunted in my book, I once heard my mom call me downstairs while I was home alone."
Finally, some people interacted directly with the spirits.
Advice From Beyond
"So once while I was home alone, my neighbor knocked on my door. This was when we still lived in Oklahoma, and I was homeschooled. He was bit younger then me but we still played Halo together. I was thirteen at the time."
"I let him in and we had a conversation about what I thought the afterlife would be like, and this was really odd for him. We talked for a few minutes before he decided to leave. When my parents got home they told me he had a heart attack at school and died."
One Time Only
"I once felt a hand on my face when I was sleeping. I had the covers covering my entire face and felt something push down lightly and then a bit harder."
"I was absolutely terrified and when I finally mustered up the courage to look, nothing was there. It never happened again but there have been a few times where something similar has happened."
A Very Helpful Ghost
"I was staying in the Banff Springs Hotel in 95 for a snowboard trip and I was leaving the room and forgot my jacket."
"When I remembered right at the door, I turned around to grab it from the bed where I left it and it was being held 2' above the bed like it was being being pinched by fingers."
"The moment I turned around it dropped to the bed."
"That blew my mind!"
"My GF's sister at the time was working concierge and she said there was a bell hop ghost and gave the paper story...lol It wasn't threating at all, but was crazy to see!"
Here's hoping you manage to sleep well despite all these spooky stories!
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Like male birds with vibrant feathers and complicated mating ritual dances, straight men will go to absurd lengths to win the attention of women.
Go to any bar or club. Scan the room and undoubtedly come across bicep-clenching shirt sleeves and loud male voices screaming into the ear of a less-than-enthusiastic listener on the dance floor.
That's not to say there are plenty of wonderful traits that draw women to men. There's a reason marriage and procreation continues.
But for all those success stories, there are so many instances that involve a man trying to win the heart of a woman using means that are antithetical to what she actually values.
Redditor Londoner421 asked:
"Women, what's the least attractive quality in a man that they usually think is attractive?"
Many women responded by describing the men who apparently feel the need to convince others that they're worthy of attention.
But nobody likes a sales pitch.
"Treating dates like an informercial for themselves." -- zazzlekdazzle
" 'But wait, there's more! Have sex with me within the next 90 minutes and you'll get not one, not two, but THREE extra orgasms! Be the envy of all of your friends with this limited one-time-only offer!' " -- nubsauce87
Wall Flower Opposite
"Over-confidence or the need to show off" -- Glasswall1
"*Famous last words: 'Hey guys! Look what I can do!!'*👍" -- AndringRasew
"TLDR: insecurity" -- lipcrnb
Nobody Cares, Dude
"Bragging about having money" -- lockdownhype
"My love will take you around the world, but my bank account won't get us past the airport." -- InternetKidsAreMean
"Nice. I'm broke af" -- RogueDeku
A Fine Line
" 'Knowing' everything. Sure, intelligence is nice, but it's fu**ing transparent when you start bullshitting just so you don't have to admit there's something you don't know. Especially if I do know it."
Other women talked about the more toxic elements of masculinity.
"Being overly aggressive with other people. Like, you are out at a club with him and he is ready to pick fights with anyone who (he thinks) looks at him or me wrong."
"I think it makes them feel macho but it's a huge turn off for me. It's happened a few times, and the last time I just turned around and took a car home."
"Expressing the need to be violent without any real cause or hint that they enjoy being violent. It just outright frightens me being anywhere need people that do that."
We Are Not Apes
" 'Alpha male' 🙄" -- justputonsomemusic
"An unstable, early iteration of male. Needs further development and testing before public release." -- DoomCircus
And other women lamented all the men that seem to think attraction is a zero-sum game. These guys apparently felt that the only way to look good is to push a possible "threat" away.
Just Be Nice
"Putting other people down, to make themselves look better."
"No, you are not making yourself look better. You're being a di**."
Again, Nobody Cares.
"The one up man. Almost always dominates the conversation and one ups everyone else's experiences and replies. Shows me you're immature and can't hold a conversation without the focus being on you."
"Guys and/or girls who pride themselves on being able to out drink or outsmoke everyone until they're a blubbering mess. Or doing a bunch of drugs."
"They think they're so epic but it's honestly embarrassing when it's a constant and people have to babysit you during a get together."
Hopefully, at least a few men will come across this list and check themselves the next time they feel a fight or a boast welling up.
Have you ever heard something go "bump" in the night unexpectedly? How did you react? Did you say something about it?
How about something that was amazing but completely unexplainable? Many people experience moments like this. And they are endlessly fascinating to hear about.
We, as humans, are always looking for something greater than ourselves.
"What's the creepiest, most unexplainable thing that happened to you?"
Here were the answers.
"I was 12~ and had just gotten my first mobile phone. One weekend, I get a call from an older sounding man with an Australian accent (not that weird, I live in Australia, but kinda relevant)."
"He asks 'Is this [my first and last name]?' I go 'Yes...?' He takes a deep breath, sounds really emotional and says 'I'm your grandpa.'"
"All I could say was 'No you're not?' Both my grandfathers had been dead for years by that point. Plus, they were both European, I'm first generation Australian."
"There's no way that even if one of my grandmas had been getting side action that this guy was my grandpa. He sounded disappointed and hung up. Haunts me to this day."-Living_Employee_7735
"Our family cat passed away when I was 14 and it really sucked, he was a great cat."
"Fast forward to 16 years old and I'm sitting by my mom on the couch and she's showing me something on Facebook on her IPad when I swear I saw a cat out of the corner of my eye so I look up.
"It's our old cat walking into the kitchen rubbing his tail against the wall as he made the corner as he always did, my mom also looked up just after me and stared and looked back at me and I was like 'Did you just see our old cat?'"
"She replied 'yeah he just went around the corner there.' I got up and went and looked in the kitchen and he's nowhere to be found. 10 years later my mom and I still talk about how creepy that was that we both saw it."-Coach_Flaps
O Brother, Where Art Thou?
"My brother passed away in 2008. Fast forward to 2016. I was asleep and I had a dream about him as I often did since he passed away. This dream was different. It was like he was talking directly to me, looking straight in my eyes."
"In the dream I asked him: 'Is it really you?' He said: 'yes.' I said, 'Prove it.' He then reached out and touched me on the arm, and when he did I jolted up in bed wide awake covered in sweat."
"I thought all this was really strange and I went to the bathroom to put some water on my face. As I was looking in the mirror, I saw that there was a backwards 'R' written on my arm in pen exactly where he touched me in the dream."
"The letter 'R' was the first letter of his name. There were no pens in my bedroom, and I have never sleepwalked before. You can call me crazy, or lying or whatever, but that was the single most unexplainable thing that has ever happened to me."-Sardonnicus
These are the things that can really keep us up at night.
"Once when I was 8 or 9 me and my cousins went down to play on this gated community I lived."
"We were on the inside of this fence when this taxi driver pulled up, asked if we wanted to go to the magic Kingdom or something cheesy like that, pulled a saxophone from his trunk and started playing while inviting us inside his car."
"I still remember my mom's face when I told her later that day."-matalleone
"Every time my mother cooks a specific dessert, an earthquake happens in Chile, that only happened twice between 2015 and 2016, strangely the two earthquakes had almost the same magnitude."-AbelrgAb25
Dreams Of Lost Loved Ones
"I had a dream a few weeks ago. Bad times in my life, right on the cusp of things getting much better (they are now) and I was sleeping badly and just not mentally well."
"My favorite uncle, closest thing I had to a dad growing up (actual dad was not good at dadding), died suddenly of a heart attack a few years ago."
"It was abrupt and shocked everyone. I was across the country and distraught by the news. He was by far the closest of any of my family members."
"I was dreaming about something irrelevant to him or anything, and suddenly I turned around and there he was, just standing there holding his arms out and grinning like, 'heeeey!!'"
"I just lost sense of the dream immediately, I was so thrilled to see him. Like the dream was a work assignment and he was just showing up to break the monotony."
"I jumped into his arms and hugged him and kept telling him how happy I was to see him. The rest of that dream, he just hung out with me. I was just so happy."
"I've never had an experience like that because honestly I've always been the aloof black sheep of my family and I never imagined anyone would care to visit me after they died of all people, if such a thing is possible."
"But there he was, and it will stick with me always that maybe he just came to say what's up and give me a little slap on the shoulder and make sure I kept on trucking because better stuff was coming. I miss him."-OctopusPudding
"I often have meaningless dreams about certain situations which I tend to forget about quite quickly."
"But fast forward a few weeks in real life, I'll be in that same situation, will repeat the same dialogue(s), will be wearing the same clothes, will be talking to the same people and I'll only realize the deja-vu until after the moment has passed."
"It happens so often, I've come to expect it now."-slightlyboredforever
People experience the unexplained all the time, but how it impacts them is the more important part of the story.
Haha...I'm Not Stalking You...
"After moving to LA, I ran into my ex-girlfriend 5 times over the course of two months."
"For context, I had moved from South Orange County to LA for a nice office job. My ex-girlfriend had moved to San Diego after the breakup, then moved to LA after breaking up with her last boyfriend."
"I would have chalked it up to random chance that we now lived a few miles from one another, except when we first noticed one another, she immediately said, 'I'm not stalking you.'"
"Thankfully, after a fifth time we 'ran into each other' I didn't see her again for almost five years when I was getting ready to move back to Hawaii."
"I had the foresight to lie about which island I was moving to, just in case she decided to follow me at some point."-WatchingInSilence
Pay Attention To Your Friend's Feelings
"Friend of mine was in a hot tub with me. We were having fun and nothing was out of the ordinary."
"She looks at a plane in the sky and her whole demeanor changed before she said, 'Something bad is going to happen. No like serious. Something awful, I don't know.'"
"She isn't a person to do this. Seriously, she had never said anything like that before. Turns out, that night, a guy at our school and his whole family got in a terrible plane accident that killed his mother, brother, and sister."
"He survived but was in a coma for weeks. Have no clue how she knew but I always listen to her when she says something is off…"-Whywhywhywhy69
The Void Stares Back
"I was on a walk through my (safe) neighborhood when I went past this house where these notably odd people live. I moved to the other side of the road as I was coming around a curve."
"All of a sudden this older guy started following me. I didn't think much of it as a lot of people were out that evening. A few blocks later he caught up to me, and started walking next to me."
"I walked a bit faster, hoping with the age of this guy, he would slow down a bit. I eventually lost him, and I disappeared behind a tree."
"He was there, as if he knew where I was going to go. He started reaching out for my shorts, but I ran as fast as I could. Luckily, I made it to my house and locked all the doors."
"A few days later, I went on a walk, and I didn't see him again. Nor did I see him ever again. The look in his eyes, it was just...dead. It was like two black holes were staring back at me. I will never be able to forget him, just for that."-Kneeling_Fish
Did any of these stories scare you? Do you have any scary stories to share?
Life has so many dimensions, that the scary is inevitable. Keep your caution about yourself at all times.
There are three different types of comas we can have. One is called toxic-metabolic encephalopathy, which is caused by illness or infection across the body. There's the medically induced coma which is caused by medical professionals to temporary cause a deep state of unconsciousness. Then there's the persistent vegetative state where the patient is the unaware of their surroundings and unable to movement.
However, after u/Pilot_Mosley asked Reddit, we're not so sure that every coma patient is completely unaware of their surroundings. Many people reported hearing their family or the nurses talking to them. Some said the had vivid dreams, only to learn those events actually happened.
Redditor Pilot_Mosley wanted to know what actually is going on in the unconscious mind and how it changed them after:
"Patients who woke up from a long coma, what's your story? How different were things?"
Read on to find out how the coma effected these people, whether it was a day or years.
"I had a friend who was put into a medically induced coma after a bad accident that lasted months. When she woke up, she recalled being able to remember hearing everything since the moment she entered the hospital. She even remembered things her mom had said to her while she was being transferred from one hospital to another."
"She said things looked different than the way she had pictured it in her head, but she was conscious and heard everything, she just couldn't move, speak or do anything really."
"I had the same experience. I was out for 12 days. I could hear and remember every conversation. My mom, and family was crying and hugging my body, holding my hand, I felt it all. I wasn't able to respond though."
"So was it awful or did your brain make it comfortable for you?"
"It was on off, almost like a dream. I could hear and feel everything (seeing blurry images) and suddenly it was just nothing/black. I thought it was just a very intense dreams because I am one of those people who could remember their dreams vividly. When I was awake from the coma and started to feel better, I shared with mom that I had a dream of day 1, I remember scissors when they cut my hair and someone stitched my head, I could feel the whole process but I wasn't in pain. the 2nd day it was my grandma crying and she hugs me, and I can see her wearing a specific shirt, and so on until the 12 days. I was surprised when my mom told me those weren't dreams. All of those really happened when I was unconscious."
"I was 16 when that happened, now 14 years later I can still feel and remember the way my mom and grandma hugged me and squeezed my hand. Hearing their cry and calling my name in prayers."
"It's ironic that now both are passed away and this are the memory of them that keep repeating in my brain."
A year long coma.
"Back in high school a girl I knew who was younger than me was in a car accident. She was in a coma for around a year, maybe a little less. When she came out of it, she remembered snippets of conversations around her while she was "out" and even seeing a few people. The only thing was, she said everything she saw was red-tinged; so she'd see her mom at her bedside but it'd look like a red filter had been put over her vision."
"She was annoyed at how many times people told her it was all right to go on, that her mom could be free if she did. She identified a few voices she knew for sure and told her mom, who had a lot fewer friends afterward. She was 14 when the wreck happened and never made it back to school, getting her GED at 19. She still has mobility issues 30+ years later but she's doing pretty well now considering everything."
"I never thought about how I would feel knowing people would want my loved ones to move on. I mean I think I would want them to move on too. but I would also be aware of all it by the sounds of it. That sucks."
"I had a good friend die after 6 months in a coma. It's a extremely hard decision on whether or not to want them to pass on or hope for the better. At a certain point where there isn't much to do about it anymore. They don't seem to be getting better but you don't want to lose hope either. It feels like hell when that point comes."
At the start of the pandemic.
"I was out for seven weeks."
"I woke up to a pandemic and no one allowed in. Thank God for Skype."
"You lived the beginning of 28 Days Later."
"The Walking dead plot almost achieved."
Still 17 at heart.
"So, my husband was in a coma for about a month when he was 17. His was due to a frontal brain injury. Arrested development is usually seen psychologically, not necessarily physically. Like, their body will go thru puberty, but their brain development does not equal that. My husband is not still '17,' but there are times where I can see the delayed development when it comes to decision making, emotional responses. Physically, nothing stopped. But it effects a LOT. At least a brain injury does. Even when it comes to sexual drive. Sometimes it's like they never got out of that 17 year old boy phase."
Accidental overdose coma.
"Well it first started off as a dislocated shoulder and after they put it back in place they just kept giving me Dilaudid and at first it was like every hour then they switched it to every 30 minutes then they switched it every 15 minutes and I just got so sleepy they moved me up into a room last I remembered from the ER and then my friend kept saying my name but I couldn't move I couldn't open my eyes but I could still hear her. Then I heard one of the nurses come in and she couldn't get me to wake up so then the head nurse came in and she claimed that I was faking it but no matter what she did she just said I wouldn't wake up."
"So it was at this point they said that the nurse who was in charge of my painkillers put me into an accidental overdose coma. And even still in a coma they kept giving me painkillers for a while like probably one or two days before the head nurse actually noticed. I mean it wasn't a long coma but I still felt like I wanted to share my experience."
"How and why did they keep increasing the amount? Did you ever get an answer?"
"Yeah I tried to sue them but they said that I signed some papers which I don't remember signing about how they couldn't be held liable or something. And the nurse who is in charge of giving me medication told the head nurse, 'She kept saying she was in pain so I kept giving her more medication,' and the head nurse said, 'That's ridiculous she can't even move let alone talk right now. How in the f*ck do you think she even can tell you she's in pain?' And it went quiet for a while and then the head nurse said that she's in charge of me for the rest of my remainder in the hospital which was about a week because they wanted to monitor me for after that happened and I had to have several tests to make sure it didn't f*ck up my brain."
"My dad was in an induced coma for a bit over a month years ago had to undergo a very difficult surgery and he had multiple complications afterwards so that's why it took them so long to wake him up."
"Not a very long coma, but he couldn't wrap his head around how we went from freezing temperatures to nice spring sunny days."
"Maybe off topic but I have to tell this one, he had some very weird dreams during the coma. He told us one time, he dreamt about being at his own funeral... and I'm not kidding, the walls of the hall were covered in PESTO LASAGNA. Ok, it's a bit less weird maybe since we're Italian, but I still laugh thinking about it."
"Omg the dreams. I still remember them 10 years after. I was in a medically induced coma for months and all I remember is the relentless racing from dream to dream but recognizing something was wrong. Maybe due to having sleep paralysis I can sometimes wake myself up but it was not possible in a coma and it was horrible."
"I was in a "run of the mill" surgery. Everything was fine until they removed the instruments. Someone had forgotten to sheath the scalpel after they inserted into my thigh on route to my heart. When they removed the instruments my arteries were cut open from my thigh into my heart. I lost all but one liter of blood and was put on life support after extensive attempts to control my bleeding and 12 blood transfusions."
"When I came out of the coma 3 months after the surgery they removed five tubes that had replaced my normal bodily functions, at that time I could only breath deeply enough to saturate my blood to the 70% level (mid to high 90s is considered a normal range). I had to learn how to breath, something that is normally an automatic function from birth onward. It took 1 month to learn how to breath without using an oxygen machine and an additional 3 years to be able to stop using the machine."
"Prior to the surgery I had 3% body fat and was leg pressing 1100 pounds on a 5 day a week schedule. When I had a ' new to me' doctor come to ask if he could examine me I agreed but asked why he wanted to do that. He said he had previously examined about 20 patients who had similar mistakes made to them but that I was the only one he had ever seen other than in the morgue and wanted to understand why I was alive."
Though some of these stories are heartbreaking, they all have lived to tell us the tale today.
Remember, if a loved one is ever in a coma, and you decided to visit them, be careful what you say because they may remember it when they wake up.