Divorced People Confess What Actually Ruined Their Marriage

Divorced People Confess What Actually Ruined Their Marriage

Marriages fail for many reasons.

The truth is that many of them are avoidable reasons.

I always wonder what is at the crux of the dissolution of a love story.

Or maybe it's all like Buffy and Angel.

One partner will never have access to a full soul.

Whitney was right... "I'd rather be alone than unhappy!"


Redditor Kztten wanted to hear the confessions of divorced couples about why they split.

They asked:

"Divorced people of Reddit, what ruined your marriage?"

I've never been married. And after what I'm about to read, who knows if I'll ever want to be.

I Saw the Signs

"I truly believe a midlife crisis... not the kind that buying a convertible would fix it. I saw weird little signs for about a year and then wham! He wants out! Not only does he want out, but he also doesn't even communicate with our 2, now adult, children. The whole thing was bizarre and still is all these years later."

00tamtam00

No big blow up...

"My ex and I just came to the realization that we were completely incompatible. No big blow-up. No cheating. Just a long conversation, a few tears and an agreement to separate for three months to see what comes of it. By the end of three months, we knew we wouldn’t be getting back together and we put the house on the market and started to make plans for a future apart but as co-parents."

"These days the kids are grown but him, his wife and I get along very well. She was an amazing other mother to my girls and I appreciate everything she did for them when they were at their home. I think the three of us made a great parenting team."

OldTiredAnnoyed

Valid Concerns

"That guy I was told not to worry about. Turns out I was right to worry."

DavosLostFingers

"Yea, I had that experience too. When he confronted me he made this weird face that seemed to say, 'How DARE you suggest that?' But it was all there- they walked home together, always went to lunch together, went mountain rock climbing together."

"I was never invited along, even tho I worked 10 mins away and could have met them, etc. She used to come to ours all the time for dinner parties but was with someone so thought nothing of it, just another couple. This was a long time ago and I've remarried since then but I'm still a bit uneasy doing things with other couples."

banvillesghost

It is what it is...

"It's currently in the process of ending. My wife of 11 years and partner of 16 had an affair with our 9 year old daughters best friend's Dad. I tried very hard to make it work, but she is done with me and it's time to focus on my kiddos and care for myself."

M1OREGON

"You already seem to have a healthy attitude in trying to focus your energy on yourself and your kids rather than wasting it on the other person anymore. Best of luck!"

Fessir

I thought love was forever. How silly was I?

Friends

"About ten years ago, I got sick and eventually had to leave work. And then I got really sick and couldn't go back. My ex wife had to take on a caretaker role and I became a dependent. I'm much better now, but I was sick for so long that our relationship couldn't change back to a partnership."

"We were working on it, and then the pandemic happened. We were locked down for a few months and neither of us had our usual escapes. We decided to separate on our own terms while we were still friends. We now have a very supportive friendship, but our marriage is done."

Sparky62075

dealing in yaba...

"When the police put the cuffs on her and took her away for 25 to life. Looking back on it from 10 years later, best day ever. Got an easy divorce and full custody of my son. She's Thai, we were living in Thailand. While I was at work in O & G she decided to start dealing in yaba. A South East Asia form of meth. She got set up by the police as an easy visible we're tough on drugs scam. She went down, cops got a photo opp, she's on year 11, and my son and I moved to Canada. I'm Canadian by the way."

WinterDustDevil

The Pouter

"My first husband couldn’t accept that I was individual, rather than an extension of himself. He couldn’t handle me doing anything independently - he’d pout for days and lash out passive-aggressively. It was exhausting."

BellaLeigh43

"I’m in this exact situation. My girlfriend would start acting annoyed anytime I do anything without her, specially visiting my parents or friends, or going to wash my car. I’m just exhausted to death by this. Heart problems increased because of this. I just can’t take it anymore."

baracuda33

In retrospect...

"Picking the wrong person to begin with. In retrospect, red flags were there early. Several years in, I heard someone say - one of the clear things showing a marriage is in decline is when one partner speaks poorly of the other in front of third parties. My spouse did that while we were still dating."

"And yes, stupid me still walked down the aisle anyway. When you have on rose colored glasses, all the red flags... just look like flags. Bad communication, lack of respect, lack of forgiveness, lack of humility, no boundaries, never apologizing, I could go on. The last several years were just constant fighting."

ToucansofWhoopass

Broken People

"Son of divorced parents. Married for almost 30 years. Ended it when they were well into their 50s. Although it wasn’t my marriage, children are often collateral damage unfortunately. We see it all. Sorry, this will sound a little rambly:"

"I always wondered why mom slept in one room and dad the other. Dad drank too much and would pass out on the couch."

"Mom had tons of baggage from her childhood, they both did. Never did anything of merit to address it. They never worked as a team. There was never a joint decision. Communication was yelling. Everything was a crisis, no matter how insignificant. I still have a f**ked up trauma response because of that.

"I go into panic mode at the drop of a hat. I’m getting better, though. Ultimately, it was 2 very damaged people who went through life in coexistence always settling for less. I love my parents and thank them for the life they gave me. I’m happy that they’re happy now. It wasn’t easy getting there, though."

honkinbooty

Well, this is just a big PSA for the single life.

Do you have similar experiences? Let us know in the comments below.

People are required to have a license to drive, fish, and have certain jobs.

So it boggles my mind that people aren't required to have a license to have kids.

Some of the cruelest and most vicious things I've ever heard were words uttered by a parent to a child.

As an adult, I was haunted by a few thigs.

I can't imagine the scaring of an adolescent.

Keep reading...Show less

A tough realization that most of us have to process and accept at some point is the fact that our parents lied to us when we were kids.

But the tougher fact to process may not be the lying itself, but some of the lies that were told along the way.

Keep reading...Show less
Lone moviegoer in a theater
Karen Zhao/Unsplash

With theaters finally open to those wanting the ultimate entertainment experience that streaming movies at home can't provide, the pandemic that kept many venues closed now feels like a distant memory.

There's nothing like seeing a film up on the big screen the way Hollywood studios intended, and many would argue that experience is worth shelling out the cash for.

That being said, there is no assurance audiences will remain in their seats until the credits roll at the end.

Because not all movies are created equal. Some are just embarrassingly bad and not worth sticking around for.

Keep reading...Show less
Woman holding her head in her hands
Photo by Simran Sood on Unsplash

If there was one good thing to come out of the pandemic, it was that it made us all the more appreciative of all that is good in our lives.

No one ever appreciated the importance of friends or family more, having to be kept apart from each other for months, or the little things which bring us joy, which we made sure to keep doing even as pandemic restrictions were lifted.

Of course, being alone with our thoughts for such a long time also resulted in our reflecting on things in our lives, or in the world in general, which we were less than happy about.

Not to mention the all-important realization that life is short and precious, and we don't have time to waste our thoughts on some things.

Keep reading...Show less