The Most Surprising Things People Discovered After Marrying Someone Poorer Than Them

The Most Surprising Things People Discovered After Marrying Someone Poorer Than Them
Photo by aranprime on Unsplash

"For Richer or poorer".

Vows people make to their soon-to-be spouses, though likely hoping their situation will only be "for richer".

Indeed, money remains one of the most divisive issues between two people, even spouses.

Particularly when one spouse came from a far less financially stable upbringing, and thus has very different views on money.

Namely, how to spend it.

As a result, the half of the couple who came from a slightly more stable upbringing begin to learn more and more about their spouse, and how their financial situation changed them.

Not only their spending habits, but their views of the world.

Redditor knakworst36 was curious to hear the many things people learned about their spouses, or just learned in general, after marrying someone with far less money than them, leading them to ask:
"Rich people of reddit who married someone significantly poorer, what surprised you about their (previous) way of life?"

Planning A Budget

"Making financial decisions based around the three paycheck month."

"If you're paid every two weeks, most months you get two paychecks, and all of your monthly bills and budgeting is based on those two paychecks."

"But twice a year there are three paydays in a month, and that's when you can actually solve problems."

"That's when you can get the car registered, or fix the dryer, or get the cat spayed."

"The other 10 months you're doing maintenance and trying to scrape by."

"Three paycheck months you can actually try to fix problems."- appleciders

Intimidating Food...

"More of a funny incident, but I was the poor one."

"My husband, at the time still boyfriend, took me out to a very nice restaurant."

"Waiter ask if I want pepper on my Caesar salad that was just made table side. I said sure and he goes about it."

"Thing is, I didn’t know you had to say stop."

"My husband slowly realizes this, but decides to see it play out."

"He did eventually say that I need to say stop."

"I just thought a Caesar was had this way as it was my first time even eating a salad that wasn’t just iceberg and ranch dressing."

"It still tasted fine, just a little bit too much pepper haha."- singlewhitewolf

Vegan Vegetables GIF by Dan WoodgerGiphy

How The Other Half Lives

"I was adopted at age 7."

"I lived in extreme poverty and then all of a sudden I lived with a doctor who bought gifts for birthdays and Christmas."

"I didn’t know that was a thing."

"I didn’t know you could go to the store to get food."

"I just thought you went to the church and had to pray before they give you a bag of food."- 0slinedupon24hrclock

Speaking In Code

"When the family had people over for dinner, if they ended the prayer before the meal with 'F. H. B., Amen'."

"It was a signal to let the children know that they don't have enough food for everyone, so take smaller servings and let the guests get a regular serving."

"FHB = 'Family, hold back'."

"They were always generous to their friends and didn't let their lack of funds embarrass themselves when doing so."- Cartoonlad

Classic Conditioning

"Honestly, food insecurity."

"When we were first married she would get visibly uneasy if the food in the house was running low."

"She never overate or anything, she was just always concerned about it."

"A lot of times when she was younger, she went hungry."

"On the humorous side though, she hates camping."

"Her answer is always the same: 'I camped because it was fun, she camped because they couldn't afford hotels'."- r-cubed

It's Always The Little Things

"She and her mother lived with her grandfather to not be homeless because her grandfather owned a house."

"She was putting community college payments on her credit card and building debt with it."

"I paid off her credit cards when we were dating and she cried from me being so nice."

"It was only like 1,300 bucks."

"I bought a condo, then we got married, then we bought a house."

"I never really considered myself rich until i started dating her and learned that a trip to Wendy's was a treat."

"I grew up middle class, and we are currently middle class, heh."- Amazingawesomator

Simple Pleasures

"My wife was born and raised in the Soviet Union."

"She still goes crazy for fresh fruit like it's the most extravagant luxury."- TheDJFC


"The prevailing mindset in his community growing up that insurance was something only rich people had."

"Not health insurance, mind you, well, not just health insurance."

"Auto insurance."

"Going without it was a way of life for most everyone he knew."- captainslowww

Old Habits Die Hard

"I am not well off but my stepfather is."

"I was raised by a single mom who spent money on everything and bills were always behind."

"She just couldn't manage her money at all."

"In her 50's she met and married a multi-millionaire."

"We are in middle-America so that goes further than maybe in a lot of areas."

"They have given themselves $10,000 a month budget to live on, living on interest."

"Own their home."

"Anyway once my mom met him and they got all her finance situated and paid off."

"She won't spend a penny."

"He spends like it is going out of style."

"He has actually begged me to take her shopping to get clothes and accessories."

"She won't do it."

"She spent more when she was a single mom with nothing."

"It makes no sense to me."

"At least buy a new outfit."

"She is hell bent to not use a penny of his money. "

"They barely even have any groceries."

"If they have anything it is because he buys it for them."

"She is a retired nurse that gets a retirement and SS but she won't spend anything."

"She lives poorer now than any other time in her life."- danapca

Many people dream of marrying into money, and being able to buy extravagant things and go on extravagant trips.

Others however, are only grateful that after getting married, they won't have to struggle to pay a utility bill, or worry about whether or not there will be food on the table.

Though, of course, when madly in love, money is often the last thing people think about.

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