I have straddled the genders when it came to romance.

But it's been a pretty long time.

So I don't recall a lot about the girls in the intimacy department.

But I've always been intrigued by the people who live in the "I love everyone" arena.

What's different?

What's the same?

The people want to know.

Redditor sencecore wanted to hear from all the bisexual people out there who felt like sharing.

So they asked:

"Bisexual people of Reddit, what would you say is the main difference between dating women and men?"

Let's discuss the WHOLE menu.


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"Women are more neurotic and men are more emotionally unavailable. Dating women tends to make me feel like I’m not good enough while dating men tends to make me feel alone and unheard."


"go with the flow"

"There's a few differences that i've noticed at least in my experiences. Women- whenever i'm with women, either romantically or just hooking up, it's always softer and more sensual. the dates are more relaxed and the sex lasts longer, and is seemingly softer. They take their time to get you to your peak and will always take care of you after the act is over."

"Men- more excitement definitely. dates can range from getting dinner to going out and doing random activities. i don't have to worry as much about what i'm doing either as the ones i've encountered have been more 'go with the flow' types. when it comes to sex with men it's always slightly faster, less emphasis on foreplay depending on who i'm with. it's always rougher too (which isn't a bad thing)."

"There's not as much aftercare after the sex unless you're dating them. I have fun with both men and women despite the differences that i've noticed between the two. it's always something different depending on who you're with. never truly a bad thing."

"ETA: Forgot to add that I'm a woman lol, for the few who wanted to know."


Woman hear me roar...

"I'm a woman..."

"In general when I’m around/interacting with other women, even just friends/acquaintances I automatically take on a more dominant and masculine energy. I even notice I tend to use a deeper more monotone voice with women vs men that’s very unintentional."

"Men is opposite, I always feel more submissive energy wise, like I allow them to take lead sexually. Personally I like this more, it’s less work for me mentally and emotionally to not be the dominant presence although I do feel like I’m more dominant and assertive in nature."

"I don’t know if any of that made any sense."



"Women are easier to connect to emotionally, men are easier to connect to sexually. I don't like that it is that way, I'd love to have better sex with women and more intimacy/love with men. But that's been my experience so far."

"ETA: I'm not saying my ex-gfs were bad in bed or my ex-bfs didn't love me; they did and they were great!"

"Just saying that, as a woman, it's easier for me to get into deep trust and emotional connection with another woman, and it's easier (and faster) to get into the hot sex stuff with a man. I imagine this is a socialization issue. They're both wonderful, though."



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"Men say they are cool with hooking up with no emotional attachment. They aren’t. I’ve found women are more able to do that."


Everyone has hook up issues, no matter what they say.


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"So, I think being a man, being with men it’s easier to put my guard down and be more myself. I don’t have to always 'be the man.' I can be vulnerable sometimes. If I’m with a woman, I can never be vulnerable because I feel like I have to be the strong one."


Just for me...

"Bi woman here. Pros of being with a man: I don’t get judged for it, I feel more protected, we can have kids. Pros of being with a woman: we relate to each other more, we don’t have to use protection, we can share more things (like clothes and makeup). And honestly just being attracted to a man vs a woman is very different, for me at least."


The Moral?

"Dating a girl for me feels like a more level playing field. I feel like we can get each other on a whole other level. We both have girly bits, periods, we relate to each other’s struggles more easily, and I know my way around so I can always be sure I can please her or at least know exactly what she’s talking about if she corrects me."

"With men, the connection is definitely still there, it’s just different. Don’t get me wrong, men are very much capable of sharing the weight of your struggles, they can please you if you teach them how, they are great partners, but it’s not as automatic or natural as my connection to women."

"I find that it takes longer for me to connect with men than women, but the connection I do have with my boyfriend now is deeper than I’ve ever had with anyone before. Moral of the story, both are great, they both have strengths and weaknesses, but they are different."


Lets Brunch

"Bi woman here, casual sex with women is great. You can go out for brunch the next day and just be friends. In my experience, casual sex with a man is impossible. They either treat you like garbage right after, I assume due to not wanting you to catch feelings. Or they get weird because they have caught feelings and don’t know how to act."


It's all a Mess...

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"The men I've been with tend to be emotional, insecure, touch-starved."

"The women tend to be flaky, overly confident, impassionate about anything."


It sounds like no matter the gender, there will always be issues.

Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below!