There comes a time in our lives when we have to cut people out because of their toxic, negative, or destructive behavior. And there's no shame in doing it - tolerance and acceptance can only go so far, and there is always a last straw.
The785 asked: What was the incident that made you cut somebody close out of your life?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
15. Some people desperately need to control others.
She said I was becoming arrogant.
All my life I was a very submissive person, full of guilt for any perceived slight I might have made against someone, and generally apologetic for being the huge waste of space I thought I was. This girl I was friends with for 10+ years tended to prey upon that. I was her walking doormat, and would do anything she wanted.
When I met my husband, he helped bring me out of that mentality. Helped me become more assertive, and to stop letting people walk all over me and take advantage of my submissive nature.
This friend saw that and tried to stop it. She said I was changing, but not for the better. That I was becoming arrogant and selfish and a bad friend. At the time I was devastated, but my husband said, "She can't control you anymore, and that scares her."
He was right.
Going 5 years since I cut her (and some of our mutual friends) from my life, and I've never been in a better place mentally.
The same thing happened to me - she didn't like that I didn't need her any more. :(
14. Just mean.
I had a roommate who's BF broke up with her. I went and picked up her stuff from his house and took her out to eat. On the way home she's going on about how he could walk out of the house and get hit by a bus and how heartbroken she would be. I pointed out there wasn't a bus stop next to his house trying to lighten up the mood (they only dated about 3 months or something) so she turns to me and says "I hope your husband dies in Iraq so you know my pain." I told her that was going too far and she kept at it. I pointed out we had been together years not months and he was her friend to but she didn't care and never said sorry, she was drunk so I thought that was why she was being so mean but the next day when she was sober she stood by what she said. I kicked her out and never talked to her again.
Woooow. F*ck that.
Good on you for giving her the drunk pass. I can't believe she doubled down.
They started engaging in behavior around my kids which reminded me a little bit too strongly of the way I was treated by a child molester when I was little. And they tried to get my kids to ignore rules that I had set, and replace them with their own rules.
Wise choice. Good for you for noticing
12. Trashy, goodbye.
I used to go to the same pub every week on the regular with the same group of peeps, was an awesome time for a while.
One of the girls got a new, slightly weird boyfriend, and kinda went downhill as a human. This culminated in one particular night, which would be our last time going as a result.
On this night, she started being a huge b!tch to the server because the wings were taking too long. This is wing night, there are like 150 people here for cheap wings, and the server obviously has nothing to do with how long food takes to come out.
So her and her boyfriend literally trash the table we were sitting at, spraying condiments all over, wetting napkins with sauce and sticking them everywhere, and everybody else literally gets up and moves or leaves.
She was laughing like a psycho, her and her boyfriend were clearly getting off on one-upping each others sh*ttiness, and I decided I did not need that type of lunatic in my life.
11. Enabling doesn't help anyone.
When my sister text my mom with a message that read: "You're a horsesh*t c*nt of a mother. I can't wait until you die. It'll be the greatest day of my life!"
All because my mom wouldn't take $30,000 out of her retirement to bail out my sister's house that was to be foreclosed on because she's a lazy f*ck who didn't want to work.
The sad thing is that my mom was going to do it, too. My dad & I convinced her that she's going to piss away the $30,000 to save the house and then in a few more months, right back in the same situation. It was a lost cause.
She's even worse than meets the eye for those of you who want to understand a bit more about foreclosures.
It's not just the fact that she's going through foreclosure due to delinquency, but it's also that she let something entirely preventable from happening by doing nothing.
Contrary to popular beliefs, banks don't like foreclosures. In fact, banks will actively work with you to avoid foreclosures provided you give them 100% effort.
Foreclosures suck butts. The process needs to be done to the tee, the home will probably fall into disrepair, and buying a foreclosure is an entirely different beast than a traditional transaction, short sale, etc. Buying foreclosures sucks major butt, and banks know this, so they try to avoid holding onto these foreclosures.
Basically, your sister played the victim card instead of arranging something with her bank. She could have done a short sale at the very least (and would owe a lot in taxes but w/e) but instead, she wanted a hand out.
Wow. I bet she's the type to trash an apartment when she gets an eviction letter.
10. Someone has issues...
I had a friend who kept insisting I had a mental illness and wouldn't stop even if I told her. She began telling my friends and even asking if they thought the same thing. Because of this incident and her toxic personality I decided to tell her to f*ck off which was definitely for the better.
This exact thing happened to me. She had a lot of mental issues and she tried to mirror them in me.
She has clinical anxiety and subclinical depression and is medicated for it. she said she saw traces in me and that i had to go to the psychiatrist.
I have some issues but therapy once a month is working just fine.
9. Self-destructive behavior is contagious.
For me it wasn't a single incident, but the fact that she was always incredibly negative and refused to get counseling for the issues that she was going through. Every single time we hung out she Would spend two hours complaining about the same for things over and over. One of them being that people never stuck around in her life… At first I felt sympathy for her, then tried to suggest counseling to help talk through her issues, then I got frustrated, and eventually I slowly let the relationship die out. I don't want that kind of toxicity in my life.
she sounds like my ex...
She pushed everyone who cared about her in her life away through her actions and then and treats whoever she gets romantic with as the piece of the puzzle that completes her and can understand her and the pain of losing every around her in her life until she stops being infatuated and inevitable pushes them away too while finding a way to spin the story in her head as them abandoning her.
8. Men who can't keep it in their pants...
The second time I've heard that he was flirting with my girlfriend, a different girl than the first time.
A friend doesn't do that, so he was demoted quite instantly.
Same. I'm a female though. My best friend of 7 years started sexting my new boyfriend she knew I was really into behind my back. She then lied about still talking to him multiple times to my face. Even laughed about it to my face. Turns out like 2 days after I find all this out (this past Valentine's Day), she went on a date with him and lied about it to me, twice. I don't know why she thought I would still be her friend with her blatantly lying like that. I saw them together on my birthday last month and as far as I know they are still together. Friends don't do that sh*t.
7. No excuse.
My older brother and his wife #4 turning my parents home into a crack house while mom and dad were still there. Haven't seen or spoken to him in over ten years.
Good on you for just walking out of that, condolences to your family.
6. Pets' lives are worth saving.
My uncle basically forced my grandma to adopt a cat they found. He say he would pay for all the cat's expenses (vet, food, litter, etc) since my grandma does not work and can't really afford the expenses of owning a pet. After 2 or 3 years of my grandma living with the cat, he got a blatter infection and had to be rushed to the vet since he had not peed in a couple of days (grandma did not notice this). My mom had to drive them (cuz my grandma is not a confident driver) and neither of them speaks English very well. Because of this my uncle was the one who was talking with the vet over the cat's treatments and it boiled down to either putting the cat down or do an expensive medical procedure.
My uncle instead of telling my grandma what the situation was and that the cat needed surgery, he simply told her that they needed to put the cat down and to let me know so I could go say goodbye to him. Once I arrive to the vet and see my mom and grandma crying cuz they are saying their last goodbyes, I talk to the nurse wondering if there is anything we can do whatsoever to save his life, she looks at me confused and tells me that we could do an operation on him that had good chances of being successful. I tell my mom and grandma this and they are confused because my uncle told them the cat could not be saved. I ended up paying for the surgery and Valentino (cat's name) is still wagging his tail to this day. That was the day I stopped talking to my uncle (he has a very well paying job, no kids nor family, money is not an issue to him, yet he still decided to just put him down regardless of all the pain my grandma was going to feel).
5. Some people are never satisfied.
Made a friend in 8th grade, stayed friends through highschool and college. She was a bridesmaid at my wedding, planned my bachelorette party since my MOH wasn't sure what to do. She got engaged 3 years after I was married. At this point we'd been friends close to 15 years.
Her mother had died when she was young, MIL was unwilling to help plan, and no idea what to do so she asked for my help in planning the wedding as it hadn't been too long since my own, then went total bridezilla on me. There were lots of issues with the planning but the main issue had to do with the bridesmaid dresses.
We went to a bridal show one Saturday and she decided she wants all the bridesmaids to match. The problem was she had bridesmaids of every shape and size, from 0 to 5x and she kept trying to choose only dresses that the skinny girls felt comfortable in. Things that were strapless and would not allow the larger girls to wear a bra. More than one came up to me and asked me to see if I could help her choose something so that everyone would be comfortable.
The next weekend I was supposed to go to a concert that was 4 hours away from home. The plan was for my now-ex and I to go up Saturday morning, sight see from noon to 8, see the concert and then drive home. Since everyone was having problems with the dress I agreed to leave the house at 2 instead, not do the sight seeing and spend the morning with her to figure out the dresses.
The night before the concert she sent me a message on Myspace and said that I was a liar for making plans with her when I was going to be out of town. She proceeded to call me a c*nt for taking over her wedding, said that my mom was a whore, my sister was going to end up being raped if she didn't learn how to say no and that my dad needed to stop being such and abusive a*shat. I cut her out of my life right then, had a great time sight seeing and at the concert.
TLDR: Bridezilla asked for my help then insulted me and my family when I gave it.
4. TV shows understand us better than ourselves.
When I was 12-15 I went through a very bad depression that almost killed me. I went through life like a zombie, agreeing to everything my friends said and having no personality.
This one friend left for an exchange year. When he came back, we were having trouble reconnecting as both of us had changed quite a bit (including me getting through my depression). We met one day to talk about everything that was going on and he said "I don't know who you are now. Do you even know who you are now?" He then told me he liked my older self better, using those exact words. To me, that meant that he liked me better when I was sad and considering taking my life, because I just followed whatever he said in fear of being left alone. It came as such a shock and hurt so much that when I got home that day, I asked my mom if she liked me better before as well.
He also tweeted about me, calling me a toxic person, and treated the whole issue as him being sassy and moving on from me, who had been his friend since we were 4.
Also, when I was going through this depression, I trusted him and told him about the problems going on in my house, to which he replied with "oh my god, this is so similar to a TV show I'm watching called Shameless, maybe it will help to watch it." That's all he said about my father being an alcoholic, ex cocaine addict, abusive father figure.
I watched the first episode of Shameless and it hit too close to home - I hope you're doing better, friend, and if you're not - it gets better, I promise.
I'm doing a lot better now. I still have problems at home, but generally things are going well. Thanks for taking your time to write some kind words. And I can't bring myself to watch the show because I don't think it would help much, so I don't really know what it's about. However, I hope you can find a solution or get over whatever is in that show that hits close to home.
We're all in this together, no man is an island. Yeah the first part of the episode is the kids scrounging together breakfast and putting money together to keep the electricity on - dad is nowhere to be seen. Hits too close to home. But i'm doing better, always on the up and up :) Thank you
3. Good riddance.
- Mother. She told my sister, after she had been raped and beaten into a miscarriage, "that's what you get for being such a little f---ing whore." Sister died some years later due to long term drug and alcohol abuse.
- Step-Father. Did not intervene when my mother intentionally and maliciously tortured my dad and his family with the planning of their daughter's funeral and gravesite.
Step-father had two step-daughters in a previous marriage and no children of his own while my mother had my sister and me. Now they don't see or hear from any of their children or grand children.
2. People who harm animals are the worst. Full stop.
He picked up his 8 month old dog and slammed it to the ground because it pissed in the house. I called the humane society, had the dog taken from him and never spoke to him again.
Thanks for doing that. I respect you for it.
1. Success is a state of mind.
I hosted a party a while back, Inviting close friends and some slightly more extended friends. Food, drinks, games.
I was talking about work with a close friend. We both work in technology.
Extended friend sees us talking careers, etc. He walks up and asks me if I think he's successful. The guy has been working at a gas station for the last 3 or 4 years or so.
I had had a couple of drinks already, but I could recognize emotional blackmail a mile away. I told him that I think he's successful is if he thinks he is. He though my answer was a cop-out, so he kept trying to bait me into saying that I don't think he's successful. Close friend called him out, and the guy left me alone for the night.
It makes me pretty mad for sure, I haven't talked to him since the incident.
Clearly he had serious self-esteem issues and wanted to be angry at someone other than himself. Glad your friend called him out on it.
That's why I told him that I think he's successful if he thinks he's successful. If he has a problem with where he's at, that's on him. I wanted to project that to him, but he was being too pushy to notice.
Being woken up suddenly is not very good for our health.
Especially for the elderly, it's not something to make a habit of. Sleep interruption can increase blood pressure, cause a worsened self image, and cause a day filled with irritation and confusion.
No one wants to be woken up, but there are definitely some reasons for being woken up that are worse than your alarm clock.
We went to Ask Reddit to find out some of the worst reasons people have been woken up.
Redditor Toothpiicxxk asked:
"What's the worst reason you woke up?"
These truly are the worst.
We love our pets, but sometimes not so much.
"My cat was throwing up right next to me."
"She brought you breakfast how cute."
"I was just about to answer that my cat threw up right on me, specifically my hair, which I had just washed..."
Some horrible news hits you.
"Being woken up to be told someone you know died certainly qualifies."
"Or when you already know, but you wake up in that ignorant bliss that lasts for about a second and then it hits you. And this goes on for a long time."
"It's been about 15 years and I still will wake up on occasion thinking I have to tell my older brother something cool that I know he'd love to hear about. Or have a vivid a** dream about how it was all an mistake and he's still here. Happens less often then it used to but oof does it ever still hurt."
"Woke up at about 3am to a cop repeatedly ringing my bell. my mom had accidentally drowned in the tub. she was really weak from chemo."
"Woke up to a phone call telling me my incredible brother-in-law had been hit and killed by a drunk & high driver, his wife was also expected to pass as her neck had been broken, and their kids were both in surgery. My husband and I were in the will to get the kids, so we needed to fly to Chicago right away. As I sat there in shock, I hung up the phone, turned to see my sleeping husband snoring away, and knowing I would now have to wake him up to tell him the worst news he would ever hear."
2018 false missile alert.
"I live in Hawaii, that time we got the missile scare."
"Oof at least it wasn't real but I would have definitely panicked if that was me."
"Damn, I slept straight through it. My mom literally woke me up, told me; and I still went back to sleep."
"What were you supposed to do? Go outside and witness your annihilation?"
"I think it's the right thing to do to inform people even if there isn't necessarily anything that can be done about it."
"Some people would appreciate being able to conduct prayers, get one last hug with their loved ones, etc."
"Cockroach walking on my lips with no shame. I brutally murdered it as soon as I yeeted it halfway across the room."
"I had a weird dream about a cockroach somehow paralyzing a friend then walking towards me in that same room. Then I awoke to find this a**hole cockroach slowly creeping on my lips."
"When I threw it away, what startled me was it did not panic AT ALL. It even slowly headed towards me!"
"I also mouth washed and brushed my teeth and even disinfected my lips with alcohol. It was a surreal experience."
"I seriously loathe roaches and there's no other way to ensure its death than a brutal one."
Screams in the night.
"One time I got woken up by a blood curdling scream in the middle of the night. I live alone and it also woke up my dog who was freaked out the rest of the night. Searched everywhere including outside and didn't find anything."
"Well that was lucky. Imagine what would have happened if you had found it..."
"Hopefully a fox, coyote, cat, or cougar."
"Being clearly asleep, and then someone wakes you to ask, 'Are you asleep?'"
"Bruh my mom be like [this]."
"The only correct answer to this question is 'yes.'"
"I woke up to my mom calling me sobbing because she thought I had died, I was 10 hours away and my blood sugar was severely low and wasn't answering any calls, that was horrifying."
"We've learned what does and doesn't work for waking me up in a medical emergency."
"Blood sugar can be a b*tch, found my mum having a really bad hypo while sleeping when I was a toddler and for years and years after would wake her up to check she was okay without realizing I was doing it for that reason. Glad you're okay!"
Something so relatable.
"My alarm rung. It's a daily struggle."
We've all been there.
If you're not a morning person, waking up in the morning can already be a challenge, but no one wants to get woken up to horrible news or an emergency.
In fact, we should be waking up naturally with our own personal sleeping patterns.
We all know that's easier said than done.
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People have a habit of excusing crap behavior - honestly because it's often easier in the short term. Long term = flaming dumpster fire.
The excuses people use to dismiss behavior range from mundane and meaningless to the sort of leaps normally reserved for kangaroos and Olympians. It's sometimes amazing that these excuses work - but they do.
Some of them work so well that they're just sort of "accepted." That, obviously, kind of sucks and is something we should avoid - so let's talk about 'em.
Can't swerve around what you don't see, ya know?
Reddit user TMTtasmachine asked:
... and away we go.
" 'That's just how they are.' "
"One of the biggest enablers for tantrum throwing, bullying, etc. is that they get treated with kid gloves to avoid dealing with them." - alexrt87
"Oh my God you hit the nail on the head. Whenever someone says 'that's just the way they are' I say:"
" 'Yes, that's the point! Glad you noticed too! Now is it okey-doke for them to be jerks they have special jerk privileges? Or maybe they are just people and should treat everyone else as such?' " - notatrumpchump
"It depends on how it's said."
"People are the way that they are, and you shouldn't be surprised when they continue to be that way."
"This, obviously, doesn't excuse it - but people also shouldn't be surprised when a bad person continues to make bad decisions. Neither should we waste space in our minds being bothered by it." - unlawfulfoxy
Harassment Isn't Humorseason 2 lol GIF by ShamelessGiphy
" 'It's just a joke, bro.' Harassing people isn't humor." - loading__99
"A guy who says/does offensive things and decides whether he was joking based on the reaction of people around him." - Eatsleeptren
"Dude, legit had someone come up to me and start shouting in my face, calling me Madison, pretending I was cheating on him. Literally the most crowded location outside a theater, everyone staring at us, looking at me like I was some horrible cheater while I was out with my then fiancé."
"I started hyperventilating, my fiancé nearly decked the dude, and then someone shouts 'CUT' like this is some big 'YOU'RE ON CANDID CAMERA' moment and everything's supposed to be okay."
"I burst into tears."
"It was the most humiliating moment of my life, and thank god my then fiancé, now husband is not the type to overreact or jump to conclusions, or be abusive. Imagine how bad that could have been for someone with an angry or abusive partner."
"Prank videos are a plague on the internet and there is a REASON so many of them are fake, or involve actors." - Darkovika
Stay Sober, Then!Drunk Drinking Beer GIFGiphy
" 'I was drunk / high / etc.' "
"Then don't drink?! Stay sober if you can't NOT be an a**hole!" - BasedBenjamin
"Alternately, I hear a lot of 'I'm a happy drunk!' "
"Yeah, according to your drunk a$s. That doesn't mean you're not an ahole. Not remembering is not an excuse either." - PepeBabinski
"I was also loud, obnoxious, and I wouldn't remember sh*t the next day."
"Quitting drinking has been one of my best choices of my life." - TTungsteNN
"Help"new girl coach GIFGiphy
" 'I'm just trying to help you' " - Miserable-Air1234
"Every time I've heard this, they're manipulating me while helping only themselves." - mykittenfarts
"My Mom to a T. Everything she does is better than anyone else's and she always gets pissed that people don't praise her for 'helping.' "
"She's now a certified (by herself) psychic and I have come to the conclusion that she's not a covert narcissist but an obvious one. I really wish I was joking." - Silent_Discussion657
Parenting ProblemsLeave Me Alone Run GIF by TLC EuropeGiphy
"Any variation of 'I'm a Mother/parent.' "
"Had some lady cut me in line at a coffee shop and she hit me with 'I'm a single Mom of 3!' as her excuse."
"Ok? And? I was still here first." - maid-for-hire
"I'm a single mom and I f*cking haaaate when other single moms/parents pull that sh*t to get special treatment."
"Last week, I was having a rough morning, my kid was being difficult, and I was running late. I was rude to a cashier over a minor inconvenience."
"Not only did I apologize for my shitty behavior, I wrote corporate to let them know how professional and patient she was while I acted like a f*cking toddler."
"Was being a parent part of the reason I was frustrated? Absolutely. Was it an excuse for that behavior? HELL no."
"I acted like a b*tch, and I called myself out, and I apologized. I still feel bad about that - I rarely let things get to me to the point I snap at others." - ClusterfckyShtshow
"Wow. I'm a Mom as well and tired but it doesn't give anyone a right to use it as some sort of ploy to get away with stuff."
"Like, mice become Moms about 12 times a year. You're not special 🤣" - SpoonLoops
Believing Your BossThe Office Monday GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy
"I had a boss say some really racist sh*t around me one day and the next day, out of nowhere, he says:"
" 'Don't believe half the things that come out of my mouth!' "
"It was not really an excuse, more like trying to cover for himself after the fact, but still stuck with me." - sirlongbottom441
"Report them to HR. Seriously." - kokichi--ouma
"Looking past the racist stuff for a bit, that's not a very encouraging thing to hear from a boss…" - WonderfulBlackberry9
Bad Day AgainBad Day Reaction GIF by Schitt's CreekGiphy
" 'I'm having a bad day/week' "
"Okay, so you decide everybody that you interact with deserves the same fate? Get out of here, dude." - myordinaryexistence
"We all got stress, don't take it out on me. I get some people have stress bad enough for it to be passable every once and a while (family member passing, etc) but general, stress should not lead to you being a jerk to me." - willsimpforfree
"Damn, I'm definitely guilty of this. Usually I remember to apologize after but at this point I've learned to just avoid the situation in the first place by minimizing my interaction with people if I'm in a shitty mood." - nozzzrul
"Reminds me of when that White boy went on a murder rampage and killed a bunch of Asian women & that a-hole sheriff gave a press conference telling the media that the 'poor boy had a bad day.' "
"My idea of a bad day involves going home after a rough day at work and just staying in the house."
"Apparently, I should change my ethnicity from Asian to White and go on a murder rampage, see if my @ss gets a sympathetic sheriff to say on my behalf that I had 'a bad day.' " - kingkazul400
It's Not An ExcuseSeason 2 Reaction GIF by FriendsGiphy
"This won't go down well, but using depression as an excuse. As someone who suffers from it, it's still not ok to treat others like sh*t" - Rainbowwallstickers
"Could not agree enough. My partner has a 'friend' who treats everyone like sh*t all the time, has no consideration for others and openly mocks people in public."
"She gets so much grace from those around her under the guise of her 'mental health.' It's so infuriating watching an adult woman never have to take responsibility for her actions." - 34boor
"I get there are some things you can't control, but you are still responsible for keeping that sh*t in check and if you're aware of your mental illness, you should be aware of how you approach people and situations."
"I'll admit I used to be guilty of using my mental illness to be an @ss, but now I'm trying to better myself" - VeeSquibbles
Florida Gonna FloridaLooney Tunes Florida GIFGiphy
"People are letting Florida off the hook way too damn much. And I live in Florida."
"Just because it's hilarious doesn't mean it isn't still completely f*cked up." - AlphaWhiskeyOscar
"The phrase 'Florida Man' is almost always followed some heinous way a Floridian is being an a$$hole." - PepeBabinski
"I'm also originally from Florida, and that state has serious problems. We need to pay attention to it." - [Reddit]
Moment of honesty ... as a Floridian ... yeaaaah, I'm gonna have to agree with that last one.
We live in a time where we are critically re-examining how we pay workers. After a two-year-long pandemic where some low-income and "unskilled" jobs were deemed "essential," we now must put our money where our mouth is.
For too long in the world have incredibly important jobs been overlooked or else outright maligned. Teachers in the USA make some of the least money, career-wise, and have some of the hardest jobs. Dancers pay to put their bodies through hell with no guarantee of paid work after training.
So how do we fix this problem? By naming it, of course.
Redditor u/NightReader5 asked:
"What professions are severely underpaid?"
Here were some of those answers.
Our Elderly Deserve Better
"I worked as a CNA in a nursing home and I loved it. It's such hard work for such little pay and that's why I had to leave."
"Not only that but I was a rare person in that I LOVED caring for the residents. Nothing was beneath me such as changing a dirty diaper or spoon feeding."
"Everything helped their quality of life. Sucks they can't keep people that genuinely enjoy it cause I couldn't make over $10 an hour."-Dancer9d9
"Came here to say this: Emergency Medical Technicians. I will never not be just a bit salty about this."
"My husband is one of those people who does this job because it's his passion and he loves helping people."
"It would be nice if he earned more than the kid who just got hired at McDonald's this morning."-ThePotterheadHobbit
High School Bathrooms....
"The janitors at my high school. I walked in the men's bathroom there once and there was a mega-giant steaming pile of crap and diarrhea right in the middle of the floor."-satanic-sex-god
"Anyhow. Are you sure that was a high school? We're talking grades 9-12 here, right?"-VoicedVelarNasal
"Unfortunately yes. Other highlights of my oh so great high school men's bathroom that contains teenagers from 14 to as old as 20 are:"
"A dude bringing a sledgehammer to school and smashing a sink, the toilets being blown up, the toilets being frequently clogged with trash..."
"Smashed beer bottle glass covering the floor, and a centimeter of pee flooding the bathroom whenever you walk in. I hate it here."-satanic-sex-god
You know immediately YOU might not want to do this job--so why is someone else getting paid next to nothing to do it?
The More You Help Others The Less You Get Paid
"Statistically speaking, any job that provides significant social benefit to others, the less you will get paid, something that David Graeber discusses in essays and his work, Bullsh*t Jobs."
"This is so sad. I'm currently in a job that pays very well, I just dont find any meaning or fulfillment with it. I want so badly to do something where I'd be helping others- something with purpose- but I honestly dont think I can afford it."-mko0njo9
"Social workers. Dealing with negligent, abusive parents while trying to help the children while in an underfunded, low-paid system is a travesty."-ZRX1200R
"Can also confirm. I like working with my family's but I don't get paid enough to deal with their crap or most of the bureaucracy."-Altowhovian93
Minimum Wage To Go Against FIRE
"Entry level wildland firefighters. They start them at $15 an hour."-NuclearEyedSquirrel
"I live in a small town in Ohio and I think the lowest starting wage I've seen was 11."
"That's the low side and those places are having trouble hiring because there's so many places paying higher. McDonald's here starts at 13 or 14 an hour."-rjoh4459
One Kid, One Para
"Paraprofessionals. Yea, my town increased the pay rate for paraprofessionals to get more people to apply since they have a shortage but the pay increase was not that good IMO."
"For that job, I think you need to be compensated for the physical and mental demands of the job."
"It's a hard job and they should be paid for the work, the pay rate in my community for the job with 60 credits is $14.50 but I think it should be more than that."-YourQueen2Bee
The question then becomes, why won't the people who HAVE money do something to help the quality of these jobs, and make sure that these people get paid?
"Everything in veterinary medicine. Kennel technicians, Veterinary assistants, Veterinary technicians, Veterinary receptionists, and Veterinarians."-aIsiduous
"Veterinary interns/residents, too. I work 70-120hrs+ per week, am on call about half the days per month, have to pay for my own board exams and accreditation fees out of pocket, and all for ~$33,000 per year."-WyrdHarper
"It's bullsh*t. There's nothing on this planet I want to do more than be a veterinarian, but I simply cannot afford the debt. Hopefully one day we'll get the recognition deserved. Stick in there, I know you got this!"--aIsiduous
In The Classroom
"I work in a special school, I love it but I really don't think we get paid enough for all the times we get yelled at, punched, kicked, bit, spat on, cursed at, have our classrooms trashed, have things thrown at us..."
"And then we also have parents making demands and admin telling us their 'simple' solutions to all of it that we have to carry out while they have zero clue on what it's actually like to spend a day in the classroom."-Sajiri
A Morbid State Of Affairs
"Funeral directors/embalmers/funeral professionals. We didn't get days or holidays off to begin with. Now the pandemic has stretched us to working double overtime, which we are exempt from getting paid for under Florida statutes."
"And forget hazard pay for being exposed to COVID multiple times a day every day via the deceased, the deceased's family members, the general public attending funerals, and the hospital/nursing facilities we remove decedents from."-Lesscute
So why are we holding off on giving these people a raise? Their jobs involve dangerous, mentally and emotionally taxing situations, and yet, we treat them as if society could function without them. The truth is it couldn't.
And society had best learn that as soon as possible.
What causes a small town to die?
Honestly, there can be quite a few factors, but perhaps the biggest one is that small towns often lack the upward mobility opportunities that are more available in urban areas.
As a result, many towns around the United States for instance have lost tens of millions of people as their populations seek jobs and opportunities elsewhere.
And what remains of these places can be pretty sketchy.
People told us more after Redditor RadicalizedSnackWrap asked the online community,
"What's a super sketchy US city that we never hear about?"
"Daytona Beach, FL. Imagine a bunch of alcoholic high school kids who came for spring break in 1984, and never left, and never grew up."
Oh, I don't have to imagine it.
I've seen it!
I lived in a neighboring town for a while and bodies would always turn up in farmer's fields that the cartel in Yakima had dropped off there."
Sounds like Netflix needs to get its hands on Yakima, a new show to go against Ozark.
"I remember a story..."
"Guntersville, Alabama. If I were to ballpark it, over 80% of the population are meth addicts and traffickers.
I remember a story where a man walked into the Walmart, took all the supplies and equipment required to cook, and proceeded to cook meth in the bathroom."
"A run-down town..."
"Reading, PA. A run-down town that is mostly used as a central point to run drugs between New York and Philly."
I am writing this from right nearby actually, and I can smell it from here.
"Small town almost entirely..."
"Butte, Montana. Small town almost entirely comprised of violent meth heads."
"More of a town than a city..."
More of a town than a city, but it's such a weird place, bordering on Twilight Zone. You'll see a meth house right next to a youth theatre."
According to a friend I have who spent a lot of time in Arizona, this sounds about right.
"Used to have..."
"Gary, Indiana. Used to have a prosperous steel economy, but now it's just home to abandoned buildings, failing infrastructure, and lots and lots of crime. Just look up pictures."
"I always said..."
"Amityville. Yes, that Amityville.
I always said the "Amityville Horror" house is for amateurs. You want something scary, put on a nice watch or a gold chain and wander around downtown Amityville after dark."
I went there once.
I have not been back.
"It looks harmless..."
"Harrisburg PA. It looks harmless and maybe a little boring but holy hell that place is a giant puddle of corruption just waiting for someone to step in it. Not just state government, there's a bunch of layers you can use to crawl up the corruption ladder."
"Used to be..."
"Natchez, Mississippi. Use to be the headquarters for the KKK. Not much there besides crackheads, plantation homes, and European tourists. Don't own a nice place if you're black, you'll be stopped by the police and questioned."
It doesn't look any of these are changing anytime soon, and that's sad.
Have some small towns to tell us about? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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