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People Explain Why They Cut All Ties With Their Group Of Friends

People Explain Why They Cut All Ties With Their Group Of Friends
Papaioannou Kostas/Unsplash

Moment of honesty: some connections are just NOT worth it.

Friends are in your life for 'a reason, a season, or a time' ... and some of you should have called time a whiiiiiile ago.


Reddit user 'Jojosiwasbadussy' asked:

"Hey people of Reddit what was the 'hell nah I'm out' moment in a new friend group?"

A good chunk of us will read through these answers and see situations we recognize. Some of us will see situations we tolerated, or made a different choice in.

We're going to talk about your experiences at the end, first it's time for Reddit to get all red-flaggy.

Everyone But

"They started a second group chat called 'everyone but percy1614' when I couldn't hang out ONE TIME, which became the new group chat."

"I found out when one of them said something like: 'Oh my god, the group chat's blowing up!'

" And I was confused because it was silent, so I responded: 'No, it's not. What are you talking about?' "

"At that point, I think it had existed for about three months."

"I wish I was angrier, but honestly, I was just sad."

- percy1614

"Ah man that hits close to home."

"I had a group of friends in college I thought were like family to me. Stayed with them 3 years."

"Then, one of them got married. At the wedding they called for a family picture and when I walked over they asked me to TAKE the photo, not be IN the photo."

"That really f*cked me up for a long time and I still have trust issues years later because of it."

"Shortly after, I learned of all the stuff I wasn't invited to like weekly dinners, camping trips, etc. Realized that I was always the one initiating."

"Stopped talking to them cold turkey. What hurt most is they never reached out to ask where I was or why I never hung out with them anymore."

"Luckily that breakup led to me meeting some actually good friends who I'm still very close with 10 years later."

- Misdirected_Colors

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Unhygienic Thieves

"I made friends with some girls in the first couple weeks of university."

"We hung out a lot at first. Then I sat in on a conversation of them talking about how they'd been sharing a toothbrush between them for weeks (there was 3 of them) - they were arguing about whose it actually was."

"That kinda put me off them because ew, but the nail in the coffin was when I found out they were all kleptomaniacs- all of them LOVED stealing and would have competitions to see who could steal the most when we went to the mall... no thanks!"

"Unhygienic thieves? I'll pass."

"I ghosted them completely"

- Susuwatari0

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The Narcos

"My ex friends claimed to be narcos from Mexico. They were underage, had guns illegally, and they lied so much it was just cringy."

"Anyway, one day I invited them to my mom's birthday and they were a disaster. They kept acting hard and tough, saying I was soft."

"They pointed a gun at me so I could become 'harder' and be 'one of them.' "

"They were treating the gun like a BB gun and acting like little kids that were playing war with each other. Those guys were plain ridiculous and really dangerous, just not in the way they thought."

"I was like yup I'm done."

- Affectionate_Pop5239

"Yeah no. I socialize with several actual narcos, and if there is one thing they would never do it is disrespect a mom's birthday like that."

"Hell no. You don't f*ck around with Mexican moms."

"Sounds like you were friends with a bunch of sh*tkids. Good they are not down in Mexico, they would be told/made to stop pretty quickly."

- Wooden_Researcher_36

"Mexican moms have chanclas faster and more accurate than any bullet"

- kai325d

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Out Loud

"Hanging out with an old friend and her group of friends. Nobody I had met before besides her."

"She left before we all went to one of their apartments to keep the party going. Dude's roommate comes home and he's obviously a bit imbalanced, which the other occupant had sorta warned us about."

"Starts yelling, being grouchy that people were over. We weren't even loud at all, just chilling and having a drink and chatting."

"At one point he punches a wall, and we were all just sitting there kinda stunned."

"At that moment I realized -and said out loud- 'Oh wow...no one here knows my name.' "

"So I just got up and left. Walked like 10 miles back home in the middle of the night."

"Heard later the cops got called for sound complaints and domestic abuse concerns. Happy to have dodged that whole scene."

"There has been more than one party where I saw some drama brewing (scandalous makeouts, friend drama, some folk way too high or drunk and getting out of hand, etc) and literally said out loud 'bail' and just left."

"Never regretted it."

- Dangercakes13

"I was recently at a party as an adult with other adults."

"A pushing match broke out and was moving towards me. I just said, 'this would be a bad thing for me' out loud and walked to the other side of the room."

- Chazzybobo

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Bill Murray

"I'm into films and was invited to an Oscar party."

"I've never been to an Oscar party and I was looking forward to having a stimulating dialogue with other avid film lovers. Instead everyone got crazy drunk."

"When Sean Penn won, this girl started screaming like her team just won the super bowl."

"When the camera cut to Bill Murray she said: 'F*ck You Bill Murray you talentless f*ck!' and then a group of people chanted 'f*ck Bill Murray.' "

"I said, 'I don't get it? I think Bill Murray's a great actor and did a great job in 'Lost in Translation.' "

"Same drunk girl got in my face 'HAVE YOU SEEN 'MYSTERY RIVER'? HAVE YOU SEEEEEN 'MYSTERY RIVER'?!!!!"

"I said no, that I had not seen 'Mystery River' then she said 'Then what the fuck do you know?!' "

"I replied 'I know enough to know the movie is called 'Mystic River.' "

"and then she came after me."

"I don't do Oscar parties anymore."

- shaka_sulu

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No D.D. For You

"When we met at my house to go to a bar, and one of their friends I had only met a few times was pregaming with the remnants of some kind of liquor."

"We headed to the car to go out and he whipped the bottle down my street shattering it all over the corner and sidewalk where people walk and play daily."

"A couple neighbors having a bonfire in their backyard heard the shatter and came over to make sure everything was okay."

"I stopped in my tracks, said 'what the f*ck?' and went to grab a broom and dustpan. He refused to clean it up and the mutual friends said I was blowing it out of proportion and should just leave it."

"I cleaned it up and told them to have a good night without me. I was going to be the DD since they had already all been drinking, but I had no desire to put up with this behavior for the rest of the night."

"Especially if this was how he was and he wasn't even really drunk yet."

"Guy thought since his daddy owned a dealership and was loaded he could do whatever he wanted."

"I went back in the house. F*ck people like that."

- EnigmaGuy

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Stealing From The Homeless

"Back in my university student days I had the hots for this 'bad girl' type chick for the longest time, despite all the warnings my friends gave me."

"When I finally ended up getting with her, I realized she wasn't just a 'bad girl,' she was MEAN. AS. HELL."

"The last straw was when I saw her from afar approach a blind beggar that used to frequent the campus area and everyone and their mother knew for years, pretty likeable fella."

"Instead of giving him money, she went and grabbed the money he had gathered for the day and took it for herself."

"Thankfully someone else caught her in the moment and called her out on it and it became this massive deal where everyone, including myself, basically shamed her into giving the money back to the poor dude."

"That was my 'f*ck this, I'm out' moment. I just couldn't associate myself with her or treat her with any semblance of respect anymore. She just outright stopped being human in my head."

"The worst part was her badmouthing me behind my back later on telling anyone who would lend an ear to her that I was a limpd*ck because I 'didn't support her on her moment of need.' "

"HER need. Not the beggars need. HERS. F*cking twat."

- Yisuscrais69

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Too Many Gangster Movies, Not Enough Common Sense

"Out of high school my childhood friends started getting more and more involved with organized crime. They were low on the totem pole trying to 'break into the scene.' "

"They plotted to rob a store to advance their 'standing' and the plan was just ridiculously stupid."

"They asked me to be a look out. I would have never ever gone through with it and the fact they wanted to rob something is what made me decide to leave my group of child hood friends forever."

"The stupidity of the plan was the cherry on top."

" 'You guys spent all night planning and decided the best way to do it is to drive a van through the front window and grab what you can?! And your insurance plan of not getting caught is for me to hide out in my car down the street and look for police???' "

" 'Ya I'm out lol. But like out out. Like out forever. Later' "

"Too many gangster movies, not enough common sense."

"Inner city Italian kids. Each one of them has a drug problem, a few of them have gone to jail, luckily nobody is dead."

"I'm 39 now. By far the greatest decision I made was realizing I grew out of these friends and moving on with my life at the age of 21."

"I own property, I'm high up in my career, newly single and quite literally living my best days."

"If those were their best days I pity them."

- Vivid82

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Parenthood

"When I got pregnant and they ghosted me."

"Then 3 months later they popped up and asked if they could bring their friend to stay at my house because she's never been to Hawaii, where I lived."

"Like HELL NO. You guys just want a cheap trip to Hawaii, I'm not going to let you come stay with me when you haven't talked to me in months!"

- Fragrant_One_6445

"Big relate on the getting pregnant and then being ghosted."

"I had one girl who was supposedly my 'best friend' hit me up for the first time in like a year for a ride not long after my son was born."

"I was lonely, so even though I was basically just a taxi I was like sure!"

"She talked non stop from A to B and then my son started to fuss in the back seat in his car seat."

"She turned UP the radio to drown out his noise and shouted over the radio that when I come back to give her a ride home I should just not bring him."

"I turned off the radio, called her a b*tch, and told her to get an Uber home."

"We never spoke again."

- Alohamora95

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Sudden Aggressive Racism

"I lived in the US for about three years as a kid, before my family and I moved back to Denmark. Went back to the US on a vacation with my family a couple years later, and I made plans to visit and old childhood friend."

"We used to be really close, like inseparable. Hung out several times a week after school. He was a really friendly, kind and funny kid."

"He brings me to hang out and have a few drinks with some of his friends (people I'd never met before). Starts off a perfectly normal and pleasant night. Mostly people were just asking me questions about myself and my life in Denmark. Seemed like a friendly group of folks..."

"... Until one guy made a remark akin to 'Must be nice to live in a country without so many f*cking n*****s ruining everything.' "

"I've never seen so many people switch so quickly and aggressively from normal conversation topics, to going on a collective full on, hard core racist, white-supremacy tangent."

"It was instantaneous and unanimous. There was not a single person there who wasn't incredibly eager to contribute to the cascade of racial epithets, stereotypes and ignorant hate-remarks being thrown out at a staggering velocity."

"They quickly started bragging about incredibly f*cked up stuff. Apparently most of them had at least one prior or pending assault charge for beating up a black person."

"I just stood there in shock for a while, not having the slightest clue what to do with myself. I was deathly afraid that if I gave them the slightest clue that I wasn't in complete and total agreement with their viewpoints I might very well be assaulted for being a 'n***** lover.' "

"Luckily, they had distracted themselves enough by getting into what I assume was their normal conversational rhythm, that they almost entirely forget to include me in the conversation."

"That means they didn't notice that I retreated into the background, pulled out my phone and texted my dad to come pick me up 'immediately!' "

"As soon as my dad texted me back he was outside, I quickly but quietly left without a word. Once outside I ran to the car as fast as I could, got in and told him to drive NOW."

"Funnily enough, I haven't spoken to that childhood friend since."

- DeadPendulum

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Yahoo

"Not a friend group, but I met this one guy a while back in a yahoo group, who was initially pretty cool."

"We became friends after a while, and one day he was like 'You wanna see something?' so I was like 'sure!' "

"And he showed me one of those hidden links. (Those links that you enter into a website to get a condensed link that hides where the site is). It leads to a download thing. So I download it an open it."

"Turns out it was a link to some child porn download hub."

"I noped the f*ck out of there, reported the guy to yahoo, and scrubbed the sh*t out of my computer with every antivirus, anti-malware, computer cleaner I could find. I was extremely paranoid about yahoo chat for a while after that XD"

- darkninja0200

Block GIF by Debby RyanGiphy

Disability Is Boring?

"When my long time friend told me she couldn't go along to an important medical appointment with me, which we'd organized months in advance. This was fine because I thought it was work related."

"Turns out she went on holiday with a friend."

"When I asked her after she said it's not as fun to hang out with me because I'm disabled. Obvs she said 'no offense' before hand so I guess that's all patched up now?"

"She moved out for a new job and hearing my flat-mates complain about her being rude to them I had that aha moment, that I wasn't the bad friend, it was her."

- essiej98

Team Usa Paralympics Sport GIF by Team USAGiphy

Award-Winning

"I was invited to a Christmas party that was being hosted by some friends of a friend."

"They had two massively overweight Spaniels, and they went on and on bragging about how one of them was an award-winning show dog."

"This dog looked like it hadn't been groomed in over a year, it's nails were crazy long, and had some of the bulgiest eyes I've seen on the breed. It clearly wasn't being cared for."

"Never hung out with them again. I figured if they couldn't be bother to do basic care on an 'award-winning' dog, they weren't worth being friends with."

- ThePluckiestDuck

walt disney art GIF by hoppipGiphy

Every Time We Drink

"At a house party and one of the girls gets sloppy drunk and starts arguing with her dude who was just playing beer pong with other dudes in the group, fine whatever."

"She escalated it so much that there was now a crowd trying to calm them both down. At this point she's crying, yelling, shoving at him and he's just leaning against a counter not saying anything, hand on a cup the other in his pocket."

"Things calmed back down as fast as they started up, and everyone just got back to playing. But she got hysterical again claiming that her dude hit her."

"Except he hadn't moved. He was still leaning against this counter in the same position looking completely done with the night."

"Half the crowd that saw him do nothing and heard him say nothing to her."

"It took like 3-4 of this girl's friends to pull her away from getting in his face again and comfort her because she started yelling about all their inner relationship problems. I asked why they comforted her if she was obviously the one in the wrong."

"Simply put, they responded like 'this is just what she does every time we drink.' When I asked why they still feed her drinks, it was like deer in headlights."

"Just nope."

- papsinchaps

drunk GIFGiphy

"House B*tch"

"About 20 years ago I started to hang out with other dads."

"We would get some beers and bullsh*t around. Then I noticed they really talked negatively about their wives."

"One common term was 'house b*tch'."

"I decided there was no need to hang out with these guys. I cannot ever see myself using the words they used to describe their wives."

- toad__warrior

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Gingivitis

"In high school I worshipped these heavy metal kids who were like 22 at the time. Tried for years to get into their friend group."

"I finally get invited to a party and this dude, Gary, immediately throws a glass liquor bottle across the room and nails this girl in the mouth. She's bleeding like crazy."

"Nobody helped her and no sh*t, she looks right up and say 'it's ok I have really bad gingivitis.' "

"I left immediately."

- Gilbert_Sanchez

Im Out Shark Tank GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy

Uncomfortable

"I remember back in middle school there was this girl that would follow me everywhere. She personally made me uncomfortable, and I signaled it. She didn't exactly get the sign."

"I didn't want to outright tell her but it seemed to be the only way. One day, I told her on Discord, and then she didn't seem to care about anything I said. I saw this as very disrespectful and tried avoiding her for a few days."

"Eventually we start talking again and she adds me to a group chat without my consent."

"I take a look at the chat, and it was filled to the brim with horrible people making horrible comments. They were talking about having sex in the school bathroom and how to use condoms."

"I immediately went to complain to her in the direct messages, and she said that they were kidding. So I stayed, but then she started joining in to 'roleplay.' Yeah. Like, furry roleplay."

"I left the group chat shortly after, and then I blocked her. She then harassed me so much at school that I had to tell school administrators. Well, there went her dream to be student council president."

- TemperatureLegal8400

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Everyone Keeps Overdosing

"Had just started a job at a warehouse. His told me that the last six workers had Overdosed, two dead and one in a coma."

"Started hanging out with co-workers, they were really sweet and for once. I felt like I belonged!"

"As an anti social and introverted person, that meant a lot to me. Fast forward to a month and a half and I'm invited to a party. I'm thinking it's going to be a nice dance party."

"Nope. Every worker, my supervisor AND boss were snorting lines of cocaine laced with fentanyl!"

"I'm like what the f*ck, that's why everyone is ODing!"

"I quit the job and blocked everyone's numbers that night."

- SteveRogersAss

Season 3 Nbc GIF by The OfficeGiphy

Not A Prank

"Seeing one of them putting something in my drink while I was away, while the others were smiling like idiots."

"I just knew one of them who brought me, and he was sitting with them. I don't have any idea what it was that they put into my glass."

"I never asked. Instead, I called a cab, got my jacket, and left without returning to their table."

"Never met the dude again after that evening. He wasn't a close friend after all."

"I have to mention I'm a dude, so they probably just tried to prank me rather than hurt me. Didn't matter for me."

"You don't do this to someone you just met."

- myhamsterisajerk

Not Funny GIF by VH1Giphy

Now that you've read through the Reddit Red Flag parade, it's your turn to share.

Tell us about those "OMFGNOPE" moments where you realized a friendship or connection just wasn't worth it.

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People Share Their Very Specific Dating Restrictions

Reddit user AceofSpadesYT asked: 'What is your most specific restriction when it comes to dating?'

silhouette photography of couple
Sean Stratton on Unsplash

When it comes to dating, I have my mental checklist. The guy must be kind, intelligent, funny, and a movie buff. He must be adventurous but also doesn't mind a Netflix and Chill date night.

Most of this is similar to the mental checklists other people have. Of course, I can be flexible. If someone is nice and I'm having fun with them, they don't necessarily have to check all the boxes.

However, I have one specific dating restriction that is a dealbreaker regardless of how many boxes the person checks, and that's religion. I've never been a fan, and now I'm an atheist, and I would want my partner to be as well. That's because I want kids, and the last thing I want is for us to argue about how to raise the kids when it comes to religion.

I'm not the only person who has one specific dating restriction. Everyone has that one thing that is a dealbreaker when it comes to a romantic relationship. Redditors certainly do, and they are ready to share.

It all started when Redditor AceofSpadesYT asked:

"What is your most specific restriction when it comes to dating?"

It's Just A Joke!

"No cruel or rude pranks."

– detective_kiara

"I saw a post by someone whose boyfriend "pranked" her by pretending to be dead on the kitchen floor. That is exactly how she had found her previous partner, dead on the kitchen floor, which her current boyfriend knew. He was surprised she dumped him and didn't think it was funny."

– innocuousspeculation

We're (Not) Gonna Party!

"No party people. Nothing wrong with it, I just ain't dealing with that sh*t."

– PlantBasedStangl

"True. I like planning weekend stuff, but it has to be something meaningful - visiting a different city, movie marathon, mountain hike, fancy lunch, all okay. But... clubbing and drinking? How f**king old are we, 19? No thank you, I'm old and have no energy for listening to music I don't like while being surrounded by 50 people that I don't give a single half of a sh*t about."

– PlantBasedStangl

LOL

"Same sense of humor. I have 0 interest sharing physical space with someone who doesn't laugh with me."

– Legendary_Lamb2020

My Ears Are Bleeding!

"I'm a light sleeper. I cannot date a snorer. I can hear snores through ear plugs AND a fan blowing. It's not you, it's me."

– YourLocalOrca

At that point, it does sound like them 😂

– CuriousRedditor98

Funemployed

"Have a f**king job."

– Cuss-Mustard

"Found this difficult when I was funemployed. Was fortunate enough to be able to live off savings for a bit."

"People reacted oddly to it. “But what do you do???”"

"Was dating at the same time and some girls had the same sentiment. “You don’t have a job?”"

"I had a good enough job that I didn’t need one anymore. And one lined up 8 months from then. But there were two girls specifically who treated it as a deal breaker."

– DigNitty

"I had a similar situation. I worked a high-paying job for a few years that demanded a ton of my time and had crazy hours. It burnt me out badly and I lived off of the savings from that job for a while and tried to date now that I actually had free time. I had more money in my bank account during that time than at any other point in my life but so many people were put off by me being funemployed and assumed I was looking to leech. But I guess there’s really no way to know someone's history and hard not to assume. Now I work full-time and have way less money overall but it looks better..."

– Pinsit

Just Breathe

"No smoking. Ever. I'm not kissing an ashtray, or smelling an ashtray. Instant turn off."

–fishfood19

"100% I broke up with an old gf because she started smoking behind my back knowing I’ve got asthma and it was always a hard pass. She thought I was joking but it showed me that she was also untrustworthy."

– Jonowl89

That'll Do It

"I guess my husband restricts my dating."

– HeinousEncephalon

"My wife has the same rule. But the jokes on her, I get around it by dating her!"

– AuralRapist

Prehistoric Love

"Must like dinosaurs."

– Grungeceratops

"That goes without saying."

– Plain_Chacalaca

What's In A Name?

"Cannot have the same name as any of my relatives."

– Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

"My last ex had the same name as my Dad and I reeeeeeaally didn't like it. So, fair."

– severaltalkingducks

Be Polite

"If they’re rude to people they’ll never see again (Waitstaff, cashiers, etc) I’m out."

"I can’t respect anyone who doesn’t respect themselves, and when you’re not polite to people you’re disrespecting yourself."

– OctopusCandleCompany

God Only Knows

"When I was dating, you had to be an atheist. I don't mess with religion. And I genuinely just don't think atheists + religious people work out."

"And I know... There's going to be someone who comments (assuming there are enough upvotes) who says "I worked out with my spouse who's religious and I'm not!" but you're the exception. When it comes to making decisions long-term, how to spend your money, where you think you'll go after you die, not to mention basic morality (!), and if you have children - that's a huge hurdle."

– Lulu_42

"We worked it out. It's absolutely an exception and not the rule. Don't do it if you can avoid it."

– Alcoraiden

Let's Move Tonight (Literally)

"They need to be ok with cold weather."

"I grew up in the north, live in the south, and I'm tolerating it until I can move back north. If someone says they hate the cold it's an instant turn-off because I don't want to drag someone into a climate they hate."

"The same thing also applies to walkability. I want to move somewhere walkable, and I hope to meet someone with that same goal rather than try to talk them into it."

– ThePresidentCantSwim

"Let me know when you find this mythical northern walkable community."

– Partner-Elijah

My Purr-fect Match

"Cat has to approve."

– Possible-Source-2454

Non-Negotiable

"They need to be male. Kind of important."

– RMHaney

"So weird, I want the complete opposite."

– eightvo

Yeah, the male thing is kind of important for me too!

Do you have anything to add? Let us know in the comments.

Life is full of shock and surprise.

Apparently, that is part of the fun.

Who hasn't been left stunned by life events?

We always think we're immune to way too many things.

Anything and everything is possible.

It's important to be ready.

Redditor Bob_the_peasant wanted to hear about the things that have left people SHOOK, so they asked:

"What 'That can’t happen to me' thing happened to you?'"

I haven't been left that shocked that often.

I'm always expecting the worst, so I'm prepared.

But you never know.

I'm Dead

Snakes Imacelebau GIF by I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! AustraliaGiphy

"A snake fell out of a tree and bit me on the head."

"ETA: I have always been more scared of snakes than anyone I know, so it’s just so ironic that this happened to me of all people."

amanitachill

Crash Into Me

"A car crashed through my kitchen last year."

aster636

"I woke up to a truck parking in my bathtub 2 weeks before Christmas a few years ago. I watched my sink roll past my bedroom door followed by a hubcap. The driver managed to cross a median, 3-lane road, up an embankment, through an iron fence and between trees. He'd been involved in an altercation nearby and was fleeing the scene."

anjie59k

Hot Air

Swinging Hot Air Balloon GIF by Red BullGiphy

"My family and I were in a hot air balloon crash."

GymDoll2000

"My friend had one crash into her pool when she was a kid."

Environmental-Car481

This is why hot air balloons and skydiving are just a HELL no for me.

Always have. Always will.

Tragic

Cat No GIF by Looney TunesGiphy

"My wife cheated on me with my best friend. They’re moving in together next month. I’m in a new city thousands of miles away. I found out a month ago."

Tssodie

Bad Penguin

"Everyone else’s stories are very sad so here’s something a bit lighter. I’ve mentioned this story before but I got bitten on the neck by a penguin."

"I was at an event where the local zoo had a penguin and owl sitting on tables with handlers so you could take a picture next to them. The penguin went for my glass of wine, I moved the wine, and it bit me on the neck hard enough to bruise. They removed the penguin after that. 😂."

archaeologistbarbie

All Gone

"Our house burned in a wildfire, we lost absolutely everything we owned and only salvaged a single coffee 3 cup."

"On the good side: There was a boy I crushed on all through high school. We went to summer camp together and I adored him. We ended up getting together in our 20s after reconnecting, and have now been together more than 20 years, married almost 17. We’re as madly in love as ever."

toomuchisjustenough

Good Luck

"Homelessness. It came swiftly and out of nowhere. had no savings and the landlord sold the house I was in. couldn’t afford a new place so lived in my car with my dog for a few months. ended up finding community assistance and got into an apartment."

jumbospicyslimjim

"I can’t even imagine being in that situation. Hopefully, this is just the start of things turning around for you. Sending you good energy!"

frappbarqueen

Early Michael Myers

"About 10 years ago, I was stabbed in the arm with a flathead screwdriver. It was a coworker whom I had previously gotten along well with. He had stopped taking benzos and smoking weed a few days before and was on a hair trigger. I said something sarcastic, and he just snapped."

Mr_Spaghetti_Hands

Bad Landing

Bad Day Seagull GIF by Sound FXGiphy

"I was lying on the beach and a seagull flying very high took a poop and it went straight in my mouth."

Competitive_Show6205

This is why I say... "Never trust a seagull!"

They are minions of the devil.

Person cooking in home kitchen
Conscious Design on Unsplash

We've all heard the phrase, "You can't eat at everybody's house," but some of us have a few examples of our own to live by.

From not properly cleaning the environment to questionable hygiene ourselves, there are countless reasons why a person may not want to eat what you've cooked after watching you prepare it.

Bracing themselves, Redditor 195901 asked:

"What is your 'you can't eat at everybody's house' horror story?"

Fly Spray Sandwiches

"I told my dad my sandwich tasted like fly spray at my grandma's house. He didn’t believe me."

"Two days later, I caught my grandma spraying the benches 'clean' with the two-dollar fly spray you find at the cheap store."

"Dad figured it was safe to make sandwiches straight on the countertop because they looked clean. I dragged him over to see and he apologized and took my sister and me for fish and chips for lunch."

- littlehungrygiraffe

Special Seasoning Deviled Eggs

"My crackpot aunt served us a lovely tray of deviled eggs, complete with very old paprika sprinkled on top. So old, in fact, the many weevils mixed in it were dead."

- PhoneboothLynn

A Disturbing Surprise

"I visited a friend's house who was living with his mother, and she asked if I wanted a coffee and I said I would."

"Upon getting to the bottom of the cup and taking the last few gulps, I found there was a used bandaid stuck to the bottom… I never ate or drank there again."

- MrRailton

In Need of Child Protective Services

"I was babysitting a kid in a pretty dirty house. I was told to wake him up, supervise bathing and changing clothes, and feed him. I was welcome to whatever was in the fridge. Okay. The house and his clothes were filthy."

"Then, when I opened the cabinets, floods of roaches poured out. There were roaches in every opened box and container."

"I took him back to my house and returned him later that day. I hope the boy ended up in a better situation. I found out CPS (Child Protective Services) got involved shortly after."

- Alltheprettydresses

Traumatized by Raisins

"I was gonna complain about raisins in the potato salad but the other comments on here are scary. Oh my god."

- tcumber

"When I was a young kid, I stayed over at a friend's place, and his mom made veal or something with godd**n raisins INSIDE the meat somehow. It was so nasty, I never forgot it."

- User2716057

You WISH That Was Vinegar

"My MIL fished around in the green bin (compost bin) with her bare hands, didn't wash them, WIPED her GARBAGE JUICE HANDS on the tea towel, and then WENT BACK TO PREPPING THE SALAD."

"She also got horrifically offended if I didn't want to eat at her house."

- 116843189

Poor Home Hygiene

"My first boyfriend’s parents invited me for Thanksgiving. I came over a few days before Christmas and all the same dirty dishes from Thanksgiving were still in the kitchen. I passed on coming over for Christmas dinner."

- MinimalistHomestead

Every Surface Covered

"I went to a friend's house after school, he was going to teach a group of us to play D&D (Dungeons and Dragons)."

"We got there and his house was disgusting. I'm not the neatest person but the carpet hadn't been vacuumed in forever, clothes were all over the place, and dirty dishes were stacked everywhere."

"I tried to be polite even though the place reeked, but at some point, he was like, 'Who wants snacks!'"

"He picked up a bowl that was crusted with stuff, splashed in some water, wiped it with a towel that clearly hadn't been washed that decade, and poured chips into it. Then he asked if we wanted to stay for dinner. We did not."

- KnittinAndB***hin

O Holy Expiration Dates

"When I was a kid, Christmas Eve was always celebrated at Grandma's. I always got sick afterward. Like, Merry Christmas, you're going to puke now."

"It wasn't until I was all grown up and helping her out in the last weeks of her life that I learned why. She did not believe in expiration dates on anything!"

- SundayMorningTrisha

An Immune System to Remember

"My grandma made me a food phobic from a young age. Whether it was ramen with moths floating on top, or chunky milk in my cereal, it just scarred me for life."

"Dinner at her house was always a fight. Not eating her food was not an option. I'm not sure why that was the hill she would always choose to die on, because she was an amazing grandma other than this."

"Expiration dates aren't a thing. If the cheese was moldy, you cut it off... I think living through the great depression and raising kids in poverty changed her mindset on food."

"I mean obviously, she's doing something right because she's 91. She must have the immunity of a superhero."

- tha_stormin_mormon

Neighborly Love

"I used to help an old neighbor out with grocery shopping, I’d drop the bags at her door and she’d give me a check for the amount of groceries. She’d give me homemade cookies once in a while, chocolate chips."

"I didn’t ever eat them because one time I caught sight of her apartment. It was a large studio, a small kitchen, and tv, and a bed/couch. And there were about 20 cans of cat food, half-eaten, and one million flies and small maggots in different stages of growth, dishes with crusty food stuck to them, and a wall of empty beer cans."

"After I saw that, and got a whiff of her apartment, I started helping her with taking garbage out and putting groceries away, cleaning out her fridge, and making sure her cat was healthy."

"A couple of months later, she got the virus, ended up at a rehab facility, and passed within two weeks."

"Some people need help and a little company…"

- SnooPeripherals6557

No Longer Rice

"A girl I was interested in at the time had cats. I came to her house one day to pick her up for a date and he had a large sack of rice open in her pantry with the pantry door open."

"One of the cats hopped out of the sack of rice and she just casually laughed at it like, 'Oh, they are always getting into things.'"

"I came over the following weekend that SAME sack of rice was in the pantry and I could hear one of them tussling around in it again, we stopped dating sometime after that but anytime she offered to cook for me I immediately pivoted to taking her out to eat instead."

- justad**nfool

"Those cats probably used it as litter."

- Anonymanx

"Yeah, that was my fear."

- justad**nfool

Could Have Warned Her

"My mom told me one about going over to her aunt Virginia's house. She, her parents, and her siblings were sat around the kitchen while her aunt cooked, and my mom could not figure out why no one else was having ANY of this incredibly delicious bread that was on the table."

"She was on her third slice when her aunt stepped out to do something else, and my mom was told by her brother to go look in the flour bin."

"It was absolutely filled with miller moth larvae. Aunt Virginia had been losing her eyesight for years."

- smoothiefruit

"It's f**ked of her parents not to warn her not to eat the bread... like, what the f**k, you KNOW the bread isn't safe, so you're not eating it, but you're fine with letting your daughter have three slices?"

- whydontthissitework

Bad to the Point of Malnutrition

"I graduated high school at 6' 10" tall, but weighing only 120 pounds."

"That's not skinny, that's emaciated."

"The food prepared by my bio-mom was so bad that it wasn't providing me with the nutrients or calories I needed to survive. I went off to college where I had to cook for myself (I wasn't allowed to cook at home because my father insisted that "cooking was women's work")."

"Not only did I discover that food didn't have to be burnt to a crisp, flavorless, or boiled until everything was grey. I also discovered that food can be made to taste good, and using things like salt, or pepper, spices, or various condiments can make it taste amazing."

"The "freshman 15" likely saved my life."

"The thing is, I don't think that my biomom was even aware that her food was that disgusting. Whenever we went out for dinner (which was more often than what my father wanted, but he was the one who insisted on going), she did nothing but complain about how the food was undercooked, 'practically raw,' or 'too spicy,' to eat."

"When she went to other people's houses (including her own extended family) she would criticize them for 'doing it wrong' when she watched them cook anything. She would often end up refusing to eat their food because she 'watched them ruin it,' when they cooked it. We never had guests over to eat her cooking. Ever."

- Galaxy_Ranger_Bob

Clean Hands

"We have a chili contest every year at work around Thanksgiving and I've stopped participating in voting for it because I want to know whose I'm eating before taking any. I work with some great people, but I wouldn't eat at or anything from their house. Strangely enough, the guy I absolutely despise I'll gladly eat his chili because he is clean and well kept and I know his house is."

"I also work with a bunch of people who don't wash their hands after using the bathroom in any capacity and we've secretly kept a list so to avoid any potlucks where they take food or to get food before they do."

- SafewordisJohnCandy

We're left with chills after reading these stories.

Where some people might make some mistakes in the kitchen out of just not knowing, like not properly washing rice before cooking it, most of these are just careless mistakes that have disgusting, if not dangerous, results.

Collection of VHS tapes
Bruno Guerrero/Unsplash

What makes us all unique is our passions and the things we love, whether it's singing in the shower, reading books, or listening to specific music artists.

Unfortunately, we live in a world where we are judged for our various tastes and interests thanks to social media, and it makes us consciously selective about sharing the things we love on the internet.

Curious to hear about people's personal desires under anonymity, Redditor sweet_chick283 asked:

"What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?"

These aren't really chores for the following Redditors.

Good Clean Fun

"Mopping, im a janitor and generally hate my work... but damn mopping is so good."

– MrDDog06

"When you have a great rhythm going it is something special. I get the same feeling while I vacuum, but won’t let my wife know I enjoy it."

– Bogus_34

Act Of Unwrinkling

"Ironing clothes. A dozen of them. Can’t explain how it relaxes me. I told one person and they looked at me like I’m crazy."

– eerie_white_glow

"My mum misses the days when dad would be out on a Friday night, my brother out with friends and me upstairs quietly playing PS1. She would pour herself a Bacardi & Coke and do the ironing while watching her TV shows."

"I'm sure she doesn't really miss it now that we've moved out and they've retired but it was her wind-down after a busy working week so I can see how people can find it relaxing."

– xdq

Our solo actions can spark joy.

Big Brother Is Watching

"pretending to be on the Truman show and whenever im in my house i act all inconspicuous so they dont know that i know that they’re watching me."

– Bec_121

"C’mon man, you’re not supposed to let him know. You signed a contract when signing up for live views. I’m reporting you."

– doeswaspsmakehoney

The Multi-Tasker

"Playing video games naked at home while eating cheese."

– thickening_agent

Releasing The Kraken

"I love the feeling when you've eaten good fibre and let out a solid long train log in the toilet. That feeling is heavenly."

– therapoootic

"Even better when it’s a clean wipe and not a poo crayon."

– TheWarmestHugz

Ultimate Comfort

"My (male 41) weekend routine is coming home from work, make hot chocolate, start a fire, dress in a ugly pink nightgown made for old ladies and watch forensic files."

– crazyloomis

Some people are obsessed with collecting things.

So Kawai

"Sanrio stationery stores. All those different multicolor pens, a thousand kinds of erasers, spiral bound notebooks galore... my kids sadly have absolutely no appreciation for this wonderland..."

– HavingNotAttained

It's A Staple

"Office supplies have a weird, special place in my heart ever since I was a kid. They don't even have to be 'cute' necessarily."

"Japan's legendary stationery stores is unironically a reason I want to go."

– _CozyLavender_

Not Caring Anymore

"The older I get the shorter that list gets. Not because I love less things, but because I don't care about hiding it."

– Bi-Beast

"YES!! I'm 53 now. I'm working my first job in public since 2006. Today is Halloween and we're allowed to dress up so I am sitting here waiting to go to work dressed as a VERY bad Wednesday Addams. My bf said I'd 'look stupid' because no one else will probably dress up and I'm like, 'WHO CARES!' My makeup looks horrible and not like I practiced, but I DO NOT CARE! I'm having fun with it anyhow and I don't care if my coworkers dress up or not. I'm bein' ME! :)"

– deanie1970

Honorable mentions start here.

The Savior

"Picking up worms from the street and sidewalks when it rains and moving them into the dirt so they don’t burn in the sun, every time it rains I do this."

– sky_kitten89

Hero Of The Moment

"Yoooo I scoot SO many snails and worms. I work as a tech/mechanic at an automotive shop, I had a peoject car towed to my house the other day and it was covered in snails. I saw them when the tow guy/coworker was unloading and I was like, 'oh! It comes with free snails!' and began moving them. He laughed then realized and said, '... Oh, you're serious. Uh... Okay.'"

"I don't care who knows it. These little things barely can look out for themselves, why shouldn't we if we can take a moment to help? I don't care what happens next, it probably doesn't matter overall but I can help this moment."

– chris14020

Why should some of the hidden desires mentioned above have to be secret?

Redditors opening up about some of these would make them a hit at parties–no shaming.

As a matter of fact, I'll totally be down for a Forensic Files viewing party where we all make hot chocolate, light the fireplace, and cozy up together in our respective pink ugly nightgowns for old ladies.