Criminals Break Down The Crimes That They've Gotten Away With

The weirdest things can be crimes. But also, crimes can be anything that someone in the 20th century decided shouldn't be allowed.


A lot of things that are against the law in the USA are criminalized poverty as a result of the 80s. For example, sleeping on a park bench is illegal in a staggeringly large amount of states in the union. So when you make it impossible for people to afford living but also make it impossible for them to find alternatives, what are they supposed to do?

u/NEW_ME__ asked:

Criminals of Reddit what's a crime you got away with?

Here were some of those answers.


Silence In The Library

I do still have an unreturned library book from around 1993.

I got a response from the librarian. See below.

Hi, If you checked the book out that long ago, it isn't on your record anymore. Whatever the statute of limitations was back then, it has long expired. We no longer have overdue fines in Wake County, so you owe none.

They used to just cap out at $2.00 anyway. We have enough copies of the title in the system to meet demand, and, in any event, we aren't currently accepting donations.

I think the universe intends you to have that copy. If you have a current library account, I can check its status. I know that this book will not be on it, but I can see what is. If you provide me with your address or the last 5 digits of your account number, I can look you up.

AdamInChainz

Life Harder Than Candy

When I was 7, I accidently put a candy to my pocket at store not knowing about it and i stole it

Ok_Combination7979

Damn you're a hardened criminal!

IAmABakuAMA

Sniffers Begone

I got my niece's nose. Still got it around here somewhere.

Kukukichu

Now your niece looks like Voldemort :(

The_Silver_Summoner

Okay so maybe most people haven't gotten away with serious crimes.

So It Seems Like You DID Have Enough Booze

Attempted Breaking & Entering. Long story short. We ran out of alcohol. We drove to a club a buddy worked at (7am on a Wednesday).

Tried to break a door down with katanas and Burger King King masks. We failed. Thank god

shartnado3

Can't The Cops Like...Do Their Jobs

My buddy got a $75 jaywalking ticket in San Diego. Forgot to go to court, got popped for that too. Whole thing ended up costing him around $300. All for crossing when the sign said do not walk.

nofartknockin

I really don't get how that's a crime in the US

efrost55

Thank the auto industry

Paraneoptera

Especially Heinous

I once wore socks with sandals while fashion police weren't looking

fh3131

Stop right there criminal scum!!

alderberry

Ripping Off Small Time Artists

Stole around $300 worth of merch at an anime convention to impress somebody I met there. She stole something first and I didn't want her to think I was a p*ssy... we split up and met again later and she was shocked.

Never stole again though.

thewitchmaker

Stick It To The Man™

Not the exact question, but a friend of mine shoplifted a lighter right under a cop's nose just for the thrill.

It was in line at a convenience store, cop was right behind us in line. She later gave me the lighter, and it's one of my favorite things.

Mortambulist

My Roommates Always Do This

Not really serious but I went into a supermarket opened the fridge and drank an entire bottle of orange juice and left. I was on medication but should have known better than to do that :(

kasowavd

But like... orange juice is good, if I was a judge I'd let you off

SSJGINGER

Same Gurl

I had gay sex in Alabama.

Mortisthecat

Pretty sure there are Supreme Court rulings to protect your behavior there, but for the longest time, sale of sex toys was illegal in Alabama.

GGayleGold

Some of these are crimes of technicality, some of these are crimes by complete accident.

Some are intentional, but nobody was hurt. Still, The Social Edge does not condone stealing or drinking orange juice straight from a store fridge.

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