Cleaning up after death and/or violent crime is a hardship. Yes it's good money but, it is a situation. Violence haunts you and you will see things you can never... ever... forget.
Redditor galaxybutton wanted to hear from the clean-up crews out there by asking...
Crime scene clean up workers, what was your weirdest, grossest, or most spooky experience while on the job?
"I worked with a few first responders who picked up a motorcycle helmet after an accident that wasn't.... empty."
"At least you got a helmet law there..."
There was a pool of blood on the floor.
"I was called one day to the bathroom of a local popular pizza place. All it came over the radio to me as was an "assist ems" call, no details. So I get out before the medics and head to the bathroom to triage and provide first aid if necessary. What I found in that bathroom was something from a haunted house."
"There was a pool of blood on the floor. It seemed like a liter or so. It was running out under the stall and into the floor drain. Other than that, dead silence....."hello, police is anyone here?" I called out. I jumped when I got a response "yes. Hi." He sounded fine, but the stall was locked so I asked "'o what happened here?'"
"He explains to me the whole situation. He recently had surgery to close an anal fistula. For those that don't know, a fistula is essentially an infection of some type that tunnels its way through one cavity in your body to another or to the outside. In this case it's a simple abscess that bypasses the anus. Needless to say having a hole from one part of your hole to the outside is not good. So it was surgically drained and closed."
"However during his time at the pizza shop, his sutures broke. Thus he was bleeding profusely...... from near his anus. So he rushed to the bathroom. Long story short EMTs got there and took him to the ER to have it reclosed and the employees of the pizza place were left with an unfortunate amount of blood to clean up."
The Senses Attack....
"The mess sometimes isn't the hardest thing to clean. It's the "smell" that is. A few days is bearable for me. Anything past a week is impossible for me to be around without a mask. I can't stand the smell of decomp personally, but I've seen people eat snacks on a scene where a guy is melted into a couch. It's actually quite interesting and gross."
"When you die, your body leaks all of your fluids and 'bloats' with gases (I want to say it's sulfur?) This also results with your skin turning black and beginning to peel off slowly as miscellaneous bugs begin to essentially feast on your body. If you're still interested I think Vox has a couple videos on YouTube about biological decomposition."
"I remember listening to a podcast about crime scene cleaning years ago."
"The one thing that stuck with me is that brain matter hardens like concrete and needs to be chiseled off the walls for things like shotgun suicides."
"One of my former coworker's husband is one. She told me one time someone died in a bathtub and they sourced strainers from to dollar store to get the remains out."
"In another comment on a similar post a while back, someone told a story of a woman who had fallen in the tub while filling it up, and she couldn't reach the tap to turn the hot water off. They discovered her days later when someone else in the apartment complex noticed water seeping out of her apartment."
"The commenter, who I believe was a first responder, said that when they found her, she was still alive, but when they tried to lift her out of the tub, her skin slid off her body. She didn't survive."
being a paramedic....
"I have a friend that's been a paramedic for about 8 years. He said he's lost count of how many times he's had to respond to a call involving someone chopping their own penis off. Apparently, chopping your penis off is something that is common amongst people who are high out of their minds. And when you work in a major city, there are a lot of users."
"I have another friend whose dad spent many years working as (I'm not sure what the correct job title is) one of those people who investigate locomotive related deaths. Essentially, he'd be called out when someone was hit by a train to locate the body, assess the scene, do paperwork, and have the body removed."
"He's seen a lot of really messed up stuff. And yet, he's one of the kindest, most humble and soft spoken humans you'll ever meet. Such a wholesome man who is really joyful despite all the stuff he had to deal with regularly for years. Thankfully, he's retired now."
"Not me, but a guy I worked with at a summer firefighter job told me about finding carbonized bodies that had been trying to reach the door. Well, it was a bit of a sad case - he had brain damage from having almost drowned at some point in the past, and was a little bit slow. I never knew if he just had mild aphasia or something deeper. I don't remember his name so I can't google or Facebook him... I mean the firefighter guy of course."
"Im a mortician, we work along side of crime scene cleaners, this particular situation i found myself cleaning more than them, apparently a local guy got involved in some really intense gang stuff, so they put him in a barrel of acid (or something else that melts flesh). By the time we got there, his body was separated into two buckets, one of bones, the other was skin and etc... Family still wanted him cremated so we had to collect all the body parts we could."
"Not me, but my mom works for a doctor and one of their patients was telling her how his daughter died. She had problems with I think heroin or meth. Anyway, she was sober for a while but one night she didn't come home. Apparently her dad got the call that she overdosed. And I didn't know this was part of procedure or anything, but they took him to see her body, which was still where she died."
"She was in a room, still sitting upright in a chair. Her eyes and mouth were wide open, seemingly frightened, her body was tense, and her arms were outstretched, as if trying to reach for something. I can't imagine being a parent and witnessing your child in that state, that must be so traumatizing."
"Also is it protocol to take a parent or loved one or whatever to the crime scene like that? I can see them coming to the morgue to identify the body but I had no idea can actually bring them to the spot like that. I don't know, either way it gave me the chills."
God I'll never forget that smell...
"Worked maintenance at an apartment complex... got a call from the local police that there was a wellness check and they wanted us to go knock on the door/ check it out before they got there. Went to the door and knocked, no answer, I let myself in and the first thing that hit me was the smell... God I'll never forget that smell... I saw what appeared to be an obese African American woman on a recliner, the thing is the tenant was a thin 30 something white woman."
"Cops said she'd been dead for at least a week or two... I had to ready that apartment for their next tenant too. She was there so long there was a 3-4 foot spot on the carpet from where her bodily liquids seeped out... never going on a wellness check again."
in the tub...
"I know a guy who had to run a VERY hot bath in a lady's house to get her off the sides of the bathtub she died in... Thing is he didn't know what to use to scoop her out of the water once she was melted off, so he went and found a pasta strainer in her kitchen and scooped her out that way."
until you see it...
"Not a crime scene clean up guy, but a Firefighter. Made a scene where this young guy crashed into the back of a trailer that was loaded with rebar. Whole left side of the car was destroyed. Guy was ejected from vehicle, decapitated and bones pretty much broken everywhere. You don’t know what you don’t want to see... until you see it. Will say it messed with me for a little while after that."
Like a Baby Bird
"I've cleaned up two different death scenes. One thing that surprised me was the deep sense of intimacy that I experienced, especially at the second scene -- a suicide. I've dealt with intrusive suicidal ideation for many years, and I felt a strong, sad connection to the woman who had shot herself in the house where she lived alone."
"Her body had been removed, but behind a bookshelf I found a bit of brain matter and, unsettlingly, a tooth with a bit of jawbone attached. I held it gingerly in my palm like a baby bird. It felt wrong to just toss it in the trash so I went outside and set it down in the grass."
On the ceiling
"I heard from a friend in law enforcement that they responded to a scene of a guy who shot himself under the chin with a shotgun. They found one of his eyeballs stuck to the ceiling fan overhead."
"My brother and his friend were in 8th grade when the friend miscounted the bullets in his dad's revolver while playing Russian roulette. He shot himself in the face and his eye landed next to my brothers foot... my brother is scarred from that experience, understandably."
"Aussie state emergency services volunteer here... We can provide lighting and help for the police here. A few years back an old man crossed over a busy packed freeway, cars were having to avoid him as he walked. Some poor probationary driver didn't see him in time, 8 cars and a B double truck later this guy was in pieces along 200 meters of the freeway."
"Freeway was shutdown and we provided lightening. It was a shock when we saw the morticians lobbing body part into trash bags, they were literally throwing bits and pieces 3-4 metres into these bags laying on the road."
A Wellness Check
"Not a crime scene clean up worker, but I did a ride along with a local police officer a few years back that involved walking into a room with a dead body in an... odd position. Long story short, she was a wellness check and we found she had passed away while likely masturbating. She was spread eagle on the bed with her hand on her clit in full rigor mortis. Odd sight, really."
"My cousin who is a fire fighter was telling me how he responded to a homeless persons camp where the guy put another homeless persons head on a pike outside his tent. He also said that a lot of homeless people living in the woods will surround their camp with their used needles to deter invaders."
So much blood...
"Couple years ago in my neighborhood, a guy was living with his mother, the son suffered from mental illnesses, a lot to lists off. Anyways, he had a mental break down the voices in his head were telling him to kill his mother. He killed her, one of the police officers said it was bloody as hell. Blood all over the ceiling and all over the son."
These are some harrowing stories! Do you have something to add? Let us know in the comments below.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
The key to any successful relationship is communication.
The ability to be open and receptive to what a significant other has to say, as well as the ability to be able to convey something weighing on one's mind, can be healing.
But depending on the circumstance, some things are better left unsaid.
Curious to hear examples of what those might be, Redditor FamiliarFarmer8356 asked:
"What's something you wish you could tell your partner without upsetting them?"
If there is conflict, there is a way to discuss and address the issue in a civil and respectful manner.
Things Just Happen
"Every bad thing that happens doesn't require someone to be blamed for it. And that someone doesn't always have to be me."
A Cornerstone Of A Successful Union
"One of the cornerstones of a good marriage, is knowing how to argue. I’d actually say that before a couple get married, they should check how their potential partner behaves in an argument. What are they like when they get angry. It’s important because no two individuals are going to agree all the time. And on those occasions, it’s important to remember not to belittle the other. Deal with the issue at hand. And especially, don’t argue in front of the kids. You have no idea how much lasting damage this causes."
"All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest - never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principles of equal partnership."
It's Not That Deep
"please stop complaining about everything."
"If you keep seeking out reasons to be miserable, you will find them."
"I'm tired of being dragged down with you."
There's no need to get defensive when there's something to discuss.
It's Not About You
"That some days I’m just tired from class and work and just want some me time, it’s not that I hate you my social battery is just running out."
"Her first reaction to something adverse doesn't have to be anger."
In The Words Of A Pirate
"In the wise words of captain Jack Sparrow sometimes:"
'the problem is not the problem, the problem is your attitude toward the problem.'
It Takes Two To Tango
"That I wish she’d be more independent so she didn’t need my help for everything outside the house."
"That it’s a little disturbing how aggressively he drives when he’s grumpy… heavy on both gas and brakes, zooming in and out of traffic, swearing at people who make mistakes… very unlike him."
Sometimes the truth hurts when talking about members of the family.
A Real Assessment
"That her mother is not a good person."
"I told my husband that it's not that his family is nosy and overbearing, it's that I hate watching him cave and negotiate as if they have a right to behave like this, and I really hate when I'm the bad guy for wanting reasonable limits."
"It got worse, then it got better, FYI."
"His parents are greedy, selfish people and treat him like an atm."
There's definitely a fine line between withholding your thoughts to protect the person you love and being brutally honest.
If coming clean isn't going to resolve an issue, then it might be better to suck it up and deal with whatever frustrations you have about the other person.
It's up to you, but make sure the delivery doesn't come from a place of rage if you do decided to be totally transparent about your negative thoughts.
Every family has a black sheep or every family in its entirety are black sheep.
What is a "black sheep" anyway?
It used to mean a person who brought shame or embarrassment to a family, but it's more often used now to mean the member who is just very different from everyone else—sometimes in a good way.
Redditor Frozen_yoghurt123 asked:
"Who is the 'black sheep' of your family?"
I'm the black sheep or at least I'd like to think so.
"Probably my dad's cousin, who went to prison for murdering his lover's husband."
DW_555Oh My Wow GIFGiphy
"My Dad. He is the only one of 6 siblings who wasn't a huge f**k up. And yet, before my Grandma died she stated that he was her 'biggest disappointment.' He is estranged from his surviving siblings... not by his choice. It honestly blows my mind."
"Toxicity is often a group mindset thing; people don't want you to leave because they are dysfunctionally co-dependent on each other and need each other to justify their own shortcomings in life. A lot of the 'family loyalty' stuff is typically shouted loudest by those who are the least good idea to stay loyal towards."
"My great uncle who stole my great grandfathers identity, stole a couple million dollars, and ran off. No one even knew he was alive until my great grandfathers funeral in 2009. No one has seen him since. My grandma started to cry because she honestly thought he was dead."
"Everyone else just kind of nodded on his direction and went on with the rest of the funeral. I just remember being very confused because I was 9 and I had never met this guy who my dad pulled me aside and told me he was my great uncle. It was a few years later that I got the full story."
"According to my mean aunt, the 'matriarch' in her own mind, it's my twin brother because "he doesn't care about family now that he's a doctor." (He's a resident. Chief resident. He works ridiculous hours and spends the rest of the time recovering from work.)"
"According to my ex-MIL (who still counts because she's Son's grandma), it's me, for divorcing her son."
"According to everyone else, it's Mean Aunt. The rest of us are warm and caring and compassionate. We have our moments; all of us have been accidentally thoughtless or done something selfish once in a while, but we're not deliberately mean and snarky all the time."
"My immediate family are the black sheep of the entire family."
DarthDreganJohn Stamos Cheers GIF by GrandfatheredGiphy
Sounds like everyone has a little black sheep in them.
"By now, my brother for cutting off everyone because he prefers his rude, selfish, paranoid, narcissist wife over all of us."
"My wife is the black sheep of her family in the sense that she's the only one who isn't a rude, selfish, paranoid narcissist."
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"Me. My granddaddy told me 'I’ve only had the sheriff knock on my door two times in my 80 years, and both times he was looking for you! 'I did some dumb sh*t, caused a little trouble, burned a few bridges but always managed to stay out of jail. Partly because my sister has kept an attorney on retainer for me since I was 16."
"My younger brother (2nd of 4) is a compulsive liar and it got him in a lot of little trouble as a teen, then he told his wife he graduated a big college when we're not even sure if he got his GED because he failed to graduate HS, went to some GED school and eventually just stopped going."
"IF he graduated college, he never mentioned he was going in the 4+ years it takes nor mention graduation or have a diploma. He's not a bad dude, but now family time is super awkward when he and his wife are talking about 'their' college team."
The NOT good girl...
"My aunt's daughter. She’s been in jail for drugs, stolen money from my aunt and other family members to use on drugs and physically abused my aunt. My aunt has tried getting her help, but nothing has worked. She’s just not a good person, and everyone in my family, except my aunt, doesn’t want anything to do with her. I haven’t seen her in 8 years now, and I’m happy about that."
"A former nun - my great aunt - left the religious life and got married. She called herself 'the black sheep of the family' because her habit was black."
Back2BachExcited Julie Andrews GIF by The Rodgers & Hammerstein OrganizationGiphy
Well the black sheep sound like the most interesting family members.
Sex is great, but there are more ways than one to accomplish that euphoric feeling without sex.
There are so many small, ordinary aspects of life that can just send a person and we come across them daily.
A good steak.
A home repair.
The things that make you say...
"I tingle all over."
Redditor OldAboba asked:
"What is the best non-sexual physical feeling you’ve ever felt?"
Adele. Adele live. She sends me.
FloatingRelaxed Exit Strategy GIF by Hannah Bronfman Giphy
"I got a professional full body (everything but my man parts) massage a few years back for the first and so far only time at a spa after the recommendation from a coworker. I felt like I was floating on a cloud for the next few days."
Through your nose...
"Sneezing when you're sick. Then you get that about 20 second feeling of breathing through your nose again and you like ahh that's what I aspire to at the moment."
"Or the very last sneeze of your illness. During a fire drill in high school, I was ambling out after fighting a head old for a few days. The alarm was killing my head which was already throbbing from the sinus pressure."
"I was nearing the field, well away from my classmates, when I cough/sneezed out a huge, green loogie - cleared it about three feet, no icky trail - and by the time I was walking back to the building I was feeling pretty much back to normal. No more head cold after that. Never had something like that ever happen again where there was such an abrupt end to the head cold."
"Right after a migraine goes away. It's almost a spiritual experience."
"This was going to be my answer. I was in the ER one time for a really bad migraine. They gave me what they called a 'migraine cocktail.' When they pushed it through the IV I could feel the cold liquid make its way through my body, up to my head. Once it hit my brain, the migraine was gone. It was pure ecstasy. Even better was that cocktail had Benadryl in it so I fell asleep not long after and slept so good."
"That stretch til you shake when you wake up."
"I once stretched too hard in the morning and got the worst calf cramp ever... it looked like a prune and I thought I would die from the pain. Couldn't stretch in bed for months afterwards out of fear it would happen again."
"When you move over 50, it turns into that stretch til you put your back into a muscle spasm that lasts days."
The ItchScratching Feel Good GIF by 60 Second DocsGiphy
"I had a cast and splint on both my legs for 2 months. When they cut it off, they scratched my legs for me and the itch was just top notch! Yeah."
Itching an itch can change a life.
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"When you're starving all day and devour a bomb a** meal."
Sleep for Life
"When you’ve been up for 20 hours+ and finally get into bed and you just know it’ll be the best sleep of your life."
"But man, after 36+ hours, the body sort of aches and it's hard to fall asleep despite being completely exhausted. Then the restless legs kick in... ugh. I do agree that a 20hr-ish stint is amazing to cuddle into, especially if you don't have to get up at any specific time the next day."
"Makes it better when you’ve been sleep deprived for weeks and know you have NO PLANS tomorrow and can sleep as much as you need."
"When you're absolutely busting for a pee and you can finally go!"
"Apparently there’s a thing called a 'pee-gasm' that people (usually women) have that causes an orgasmic feeling when you pee after holding it for a while! I’ve definitely experienced this and I’ve intentionally waited a while so I could have that good feeling... lol."
I Can Hear!!
"The feeling of water leaving your ear after being there all day."
"I had some impacted earwax for a week in one ear, and when it finally got removed it was the best feeling in the world. Initially it was like having a tv or radio in my ear that only had static, but then I could hear. Good god, I could hear. It was amazing."
"Oh man, and it’s WARM from being in your head, and the warmth makes the sensation of leaving even better."
A Good Restdog puppy GIFGiphy
"Sleeping in a warm blanket in winters."
"Or sleeping in a cold blanket in summer."
I am enthralled by all of those things.
People need to stop throwing out unwanted advice.
And when it is requested, think before you speak.
People with mental disorders don't need everyone telling them they have a fix like "exercise" or "herbal supplements."
Redditor Gold-Ad-2827 asked:
"People with mental disorders: What do you hate being told the most?"
I hated being told to just smile. You smile and go away.
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"It's all in your head. Where else would it?! My colon?"
"Everybody goes through that."
"This saying makes my blood boil. Or the 'I was that age once too ya know' yeah no sh*t you were that age once. And just because you were that age once doesn’t mean we have the same experience."
"They try to minimize it."
"You're worried? Just stop."
"You're sad? Just don't be."
"You're compulsively binge eating? Eat less."
"Thanks for that stellar advice."
"Or even better, 'Just do it!' As if ADHD paralysis can be stopped with a can-do attitude."
"I get so frustrated when people treat the idea of 'holistic medicine' as some kind of woo. How does it escape so many people that the body works holistically? Even a lot of doctors seem to ignore this. It's very frustrating when you have 2 or 3 or 4 illnesses that are all affecting each other, and your 'physical health' is held distinct from your mental health, and nothing anyone is doing to treat you works because no one's looking at the whole system."
"I just got a lecture from a psychiatrist I am seeing about nutrition, and he apologized to me for doing so but I told him, 'No, I appreciate it. Do it for all your patients.' because it told me he's trying to look at the whole picture and actually fix what's wrong. It gave me faith in him."
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"You need to calm down."
"Never is the history of calm down has calm down ever caused anyone to calm down."
Calm down. I hate that one. You calm down.
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"When they try to give me tips on what to do, like bruh as if I didn't already try that."
"You don't look sad. No crap... that's so I can avoid having this conversation. Also depression isn't 'being sad' like people think."
"God, I hate this. It's because saying 'I'm depressed' has been standard for people expressing that they're slightly unhappy about something dumb like not getting enough croutons on their salad or some crap. Now that's just what everyone assumes you mean when you say you have depression."
"'Stop being lazy.'"
“'Lazy' is when you don’t want to do anything at all. 'Executive disfunction' is when you can do everything at all, but that one easy quick thing that you do want to do just makes you and your brain freeze completely days ahead. I’m tired of people not understand that even when I explain and look at me like I’m bullshitting instead."
Ways to Cope
"Maybe you should try praying harder. I did, He prescribed medication."
"Praying is a way to cope for a lot of people, I think. That's totally fine, but insisting on praying in lieu of getting real help or actually addressing the issue is when it is not only unhelpful, but dangerously detrimental."
"Religious people will bypass everyone’s cultures, identity, views, and feelings just to be right and make a point. it’s disgusting. I read somewhere that real so called Christianity is all wrong. The real faith is from the Aramaic history and all the meanings were misinterpreted and the stories and all were made up by Catholics wanting to control their people. Yuck."
'contamination'Disgusted Season 6 GIF by Brooklyn Nine-NineGiphy
"As someone with OCD with a lot of attention to 'contamination', having someone try to explain contradictions in why I'm doing something that is technically unclean when I wouldn't do something that is technically clean due to OCD. There are a few doorknobs that I will not touch no matter how much you clean them in front of me and I know it makes no sense, if it made sense I wouldn't have OCD i'd just be cleanly."
Stop trying to be an armchair therapist. Be empathetic to people first.