Creative People Riff Off An "Apple A Day Keeps The Doctor Away" With Other Fruits and Veggies

Creative People Riff Off An "Apple A Day Keeps The Doctor Away" With Other Fruits and Veggies

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Apples didn't work out so well for Adam and Eve or Snow White, but the saying goes that an apple a day is good for you. Of course it's only supposed to keep away doctors, not snakes or evil stepmothers.

Reddit user SpacedJ asked "If garlic keeps vampires away, and apples keep doctors away, what do other fruits and vegetables keep away?"

Here are the suggestions.

iNom

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Apple keeps PC gamers away.

Dipped in Olive Oyl?

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Spinach keeps Bluto away.

Toasty

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Avocados (on toast) keep the baby boomers away.

Or will keep millennials away from owning real estate.

Holes in the Story

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Onions keep Yellow Spotted Lizards away.

To the Yard

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Milkshakes bring boys. So not that.

Too Soon

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Potatoes don't keep anyone away, everyone loves potatoes.

Maybe they keep hatred away.

A LACK of potatoes keeps the Irish away.

Poor Kitty

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Cucumbers keep the cats away.

Did Someone Lose a Bet?

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Durian fruit keeps away everyone.

Pizza Isn't Hawaiian or Italian

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Pineapple is a well known Italian repellent.

Eggsactly

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I recently brought hard boiled eggs to work and my coworker (older than me by 40 years) got super confused and freaked out because my eggs were brown. He had never, in 65 years, seen a brown chicken egg. "Aren't eggs supposed to be white?" He kept asking. I explained that chicken eggs can come in all kinds of colors and I swear I blew his mind. He then went into a tirade, demanding to know why the brown eggs "cost more." He literally didn't know they existed a moment before, but just assumed they cost more than white eggs. He got so upset he left and didn't come back to the water cooler for the rest of the day.

So, brown eggs keep the confused baby boomer away, I guess.

White is Just Bleached Wheat

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Worked in Subway. During very busy days, (especially) towards the evening, we have run out of white bread. Apparently plain brown bread is enough to scare away 95% of customers.

Lob It

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Any type of fruit can keep anyone away, as long you throw it hard enough.

Ghosted

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Ghost pepper sauce in a spray can keeps lots of things away.

Dilly Dilly

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Lavender keeps moths out of your closet. It also keeps spiders and scorpions away

He's Got an Office in Transylvania

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Garlic soaked apples keep away Dr. Acula.

Sometimes...

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Rotten tomatoes keep moviegoers away.

Romance Repellent

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Beans keep potential dates away.

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Photo by Fred Moon on Unsplash

It's a known fact, that after having one too many drinks, our judgment and multiple abilities become severely impaired.

And as a result, we should probably avoid doing important work, calling exes or unrequited crushes, and, of course, driving.

But, have you ever surprised yourself, by realizing that you're actually good at something after having a few drinks.

That maybe one thing an excess of alcohol cured was your self-consciousness, and may have improved your confidence?

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Redditor egalCriminal69 was curious to learn the best tips from the most alert and attentive Reddit users on how to stay aware of your surroundings and handle possibly unsafe situations, leading them to ask:

"People with street-smarts, what is ur best street tips?"
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Battlecreek Coffee Roasters on Unsplash

Good smells and bad smells are generally considered pretty universal, but there are definitely some outliers.

Most people can't stand the smell of gasoline, but there are quite a few people who find the smell pleasant.

Redditor Psycho_Bunny_Cutie asked:

"What's a weird smell you're willing to admit you like?"

Skunk

"Skunk"

"Not getting sprayed directly because I've never had that happen so I don't know if I'd like it, but the lingering aftermath."

"My friend's dogs got sprayed and I helped get them bathed. It almost drove them out of their house, but I liked the smell. It lingered for months."

- LakotaGrl

Giphy

​Disney Home Video

"I remember liking the smell of Disney VHS cases."

- AtlUtdGold

"Omg. This unlocked a memory for me. I also loved this. But I haven’t done it in so long that I had forgotten. But this comment literally brought the smell right back. Thank you!"

- el-mil

"Me toooooo. Holy sh*t. I feel like it’s 1995 and I’m on the living room floor about to pop in Pocahontas for the 4th time today."

- lubs96

Friends' Homes

"​I dont know if this counts, where I used to live is very common to hug people all the time, and if I have been in someone's home before, the place would have a particular smell, and almost everytime I would hug them, they would smell like their home. It always felt good to make that association, it was comforting somehow."

- Montpierce

"Same for me, and then when you're out and about and you catch a wiff of something that smells the same even if it's been years they pop into your mind."

- loonettt

New Tech

"​The smell of brand new tech gadgets. It smells of technology. Whenever I buy a new mouse or keyboard (it is especially true for logitech products I don't know if it is a general thing) I sniff them as long as I can detect that sweet plastic-y, ultra clean-smelling goodness."

- bobisz

"Back when CD's were the dominant form of data transfer, I would LOVE every time a new one was opened, just sniffing the new CD."

"Years later, I discovered a nearly identical (to me) smell that works just as well... fresh saffron. Saffron smells like new CD's to me, and I love it."

- ConnectionIssues

Mimeograph Solvent

"Ah, back in the old days, the smell of papers that the teacher handed out that were fresh off those old hand-cranked mimeograph machines. The solvent. Mmmm."

- whazzup_b*tches

Fast Times At Ridgemont High GIF by FilminGiphy

Pool Toys

​"Pvc pool toys when you're unfolding them before you blow them up."

- NoticeWhenUAreHappy

"I bought a shower curtain the other day and instead of a light plastic smell it smelled heavily of inflatable pool toys, best shower ever."

- I_PEE_WITH_THAT

Basements

"I love the smell of basement- which I don't know if is weird, but I'm the only one I know who likes it."​

- AmeliaUsesReddit

"Yessss, also sometimes underground parking garages or stairwells have it. Everyone always thinks I’m an idiot when I bring it up."

- Fenzik

​Home Depot

​"The smell of Home Depot"

- lanuevagringa

"I have long been hoping for Yankee Candle to team up with Home Depot to a lumber aisle scented candle."

- MintyFreshBreathYo

​Hot Pavement And Rain

​"Hot parking lot when it first starts to rain."

- TheUSForestService

"The best! I can smell it now. Thanks for that. That smell in a sun shower is like the best feeling you could ever feel."

- uffdathatisnice

​Burnt Matches

​"Matches after the flame goes out."

- makeful

"Ooooh I like the smell when you blow out a candle."

- Kaisa_is_short

Lighting Up GIF by GifGariGiphy

While there are some smells that seem like everyone must hate them, there's always going to be someone who thinks they smell better than roses.

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Jack B / Unsplash

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