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It'd Be So Easy, Too

These stories are in no way a strategy guide to follow, a map to abide by, or rules to success. No, they are simple musings from people who've thought up the best ways to sneak their way into any job they'd want.

Absolutely do not follow the answers to Reddit user, u/NBLSS's, question. Seriously. What high level job do you think you could lie your way into with no experience and no one would notice?

Getting That Tenure

"They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I said I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard."

cornette

Fake News

Head of a Newspaper.

Always just be in a rush and yell things at my underlings. Get me that scoop! Do what you gotta do to get me that story kid! I need pictures of Spiderman!

Philly8181

Not Lies. False Truths.

Not sure if high level but "Paranormal Investigator".

Lying with conviction and charisma is one of the most important qualities one can have in that line of work.

finelytunedwalnut

Someone Who Actually Did It

Lied my way into a tech repair job.

Asked my new boss if he could run me over their operating procedure with an example on the bench and apart from putting my pc together had no real experience at all. But I watched and learned and asked for lots of second opinions in my first month.

Never got noticed and got extra work from him using my software experience. I still freelance software solutions for him and his clients today hahah.

That_HomelessGuy

You Are (Adjective) That Likes (Adverb)

Horoscope writer seems pretty straightforward

Onomahtopoeia

That's All It Takes, Right?

IT guy. Good ol' unplug it and plug it back in

repspls

Get The Team Together

I'm a pretty good cook, but never worked in catering professionally, other than catering a few friends parties.

One day a small but posh cafe near my kids school put a sign saying they needed a head chef who made "foodie" foods rather than classically made food etc.

I walked in, spoke with one half of the owners (the wife ran the retail part, the Italian classically trained soon-to-be-ex-husband ran the kitchen but was leaving soon). Told her I'm possibly what she's looking for, would she like a demonstration etc. This was on a Thursday, she asked me to come back on the Monday with some dishes.

Long story short, came back Monday and had the job by Thursday. Redsigined the menu, ran a team of 5, put all in place, everyone loved the menu and food...

...and 7 weeks after starting I found that they didn't have a license to sell food. I bounced within 10mins of finding out. All in all, I was on the job 8 weeks running stuff I've never done before. Proud achievement but when I asked legit chef friends about it (who were way jealous I'd done that without any training or anything) they told me that at the very least I could be named in documents if the shop got in trouble for selling food.

thebigfrenchie

Does Anyone Really Know Anything?

Wine taster.

I could just make ANYTHING up and people would agree with me.

duckswithfacialhair

Set...

Secretary of Education?

tacos41

...SPIKE!

Too easy: President.

MikeBrando2

Manipulation is designed to be stealthy. We hardly recognize it when it's happening to us because our abuser has forced it to appear under wraps.

But when we recognize it for what it really is, we really feel like we've been smacked across the face. There is no other descriptor for it. Usually we've trusted and loved those that manipulated us.

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Image by Anita S. from Pixabay

Just as new mothers encounter the sudden, influential developments of powerful hormone changes, protective instincts, and milk production, so new fathers undergo some key changes of their own.

Their socks become exclusively white, climbing higher up the calf than ever before. All their shorts sprout cargo pockets and clunky belt loop cell phone holders. They start to really lean in to their old records.

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Image by Patricia Srigley from Pixabay

Cleaning up is hard enough when it's just clearing a month of dust bunnies. Can you imagine cleaning the debris left by murder, suicide and violence? I have a really great friend who used to do crime scene clean-up for a living. The pay is incredible; it starts at $55 an hour. But there is a much higher cost in mental well being. Death affects you in ways you don't always feel immediately. My friend has stories of nightmares, depression and pain after leaving scenes of horror. Why make all that money just to spend it on therapy? It takes a certain type of person.

***TRIGGER WARNING. CONTENTS ARE SENSITIVE ***

Redditor u/MemegodDave wanted to hear from the people who have the stomach to come in after crime and tragedy

to try to bring back some form of normalcy to the location by asking... People who make their living out of cleaning murder scenes, accidents and the like, what is the worst thing you have experienced in your career?

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We all know the telltale signs that something is making us uncomfortable. Suddenly, we begin shaking, either in our hands or knees or toes. Then, usually, sweat starts pouring out of every part of our body, making it look like we just ran through a rainstorm underneath a waterfall. Finally, we lose our regular speech functions. Everything goes out of sync and our words don't match up to what's in our minds.

What's interesting is that what usually brings about these fits of uncomfortableness differs from person to person, as evidenced by the stories below.

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