Marriage is - theoretically - a forever kind of thing. Not a lot of people go into it thinking it's something they'll do until they get bored and something else comes along. Having said that, forever is a really long time to spend with a person and divorce is all too common. That doesn't mean it's a must, though. Millennials have been blamed for "killing" divorce (umm, you're welcome?) but it's not like they're the first to be able to battle back from the edge.
One Reddit user asked:
Redditors who salvaged their marriage from the brink of divorce, what's your story and how's it going now?
A surprising number of brave people stepped up to talk about it - and what it mostly boils down to is that honesty and communication are a must. Oh, also maybe don't play so many video games and handle your mental health people!
The responses have been edited for language, but that's it. These are people's stories in their own words. Some are heartbreaking, some are kind of funny, but they're all honest and vulnerable.
Warcraft = War At Home
Husband played World of Warcraft. A lot. We had two kids. I was miserable and controlling.
I went to therapy for myself and got some emotional tools on how to deal with life. It was mind blowing. I also learned how to not let fear dictate my decisions. Husband noticed. I basically went from controlling and nagging and a mean sobbing mess to calm, independent and in some ways less caring. He got nervous and agreed to go to therapy.
He went for two sessions. Basically he got his view of reality called into question. I swear our therapist was like a non-evil Hannible Lecter. He was good at getting to the heart of things but both myself and my husband were desperate for change.
My husband stepped up. And I stepped down from trying to micromanage his life. I want him to enjoy video games. I do too. But he needs to be emotionally available. If I'm making dinner I'll tell him "Don't start a new game, dinner is almost ready" or he'll ask how much time he has ... Or wait to game after kids sleep.
It's the communication, the consideration and the priorities that need to be changed. If you're using gaming as a crutch for other issues, you'll just find a replacement if gaming is taken away.
So, yeah he still plays. But he plays because he enjoys it, not as a way to escape real life every second he can.
Life is good.
Re-Directed Emotional Energy
I caught my wife chatting with someone else online. When I called her on it, she said she knew I was talking to someone else too. We had been (emotionally) cheating on each other because we felt like we weren't getting what we needed from the marriage.
We realized that if we just took the effort that we were spending on the other people and spent it on each other, we'd be happy and getting what we needed. Now our marriage is really amazing.
1000 Miles
Most of our problems came from his family full of awful, abusive, intrusive, boundary-stomping as$holes.
We moved 1000 miles away and no longer speak to them. We're happy now.
We Forgot To Be In Love
Go back 17 years ago, we had a young son. He was my dream child. I lost my focus on my husband and centered entirely on my son. My husband never said much.
I was so tired too. All I wanted to do after working 9-10 hours was sleep. He had a job he hated and works 10 hours a day too.
We forgot to be in love. Period. I nagged a lot and he just ignored me. I caught him telling our problems to a stranger on the Internet. I asked for a divorce.
It was around January. I said we would let my son finish the school year and I would leave in June.
After that, we coexisted as friends. We had been together for 16 years, so that wasn't hard. Our parents knew we were divorcing and they didn't understand because we were such good friends.
Around March we were bored. We wanted to go out to dinner and a movie. I asked my mom to babysit. It was just as friends. I actually took the time to get ready. He did too. We went to dinner and then the movie. By habit, I just grabbed his hand. He never said anything, but just stroked the back of my hand and never let go.
We got back into the car. It was late, so we let our son stay overnight.
I don't know what happened that night, but I felt something I had never felt before. I was holding on to my best friend and I wasn't going to let go.
We went home and just held each other. Divorce was never mentioned again. In my own head I realized that I had to put him first. He needed me too. I balanced my time and he learned to give me the reassurance that I needed to feel loved.
As I currently watch him sleep, with our young 7 year old between us, I know that our marriage is about as perfect as a marriage can be. We have both forgiven and accepted each other's faults.
My advice to you..
- Make one date a month. Make it special. 2 Every 3-4 months, plan to go out-of-town for a night. Act like teenagers. I can't tell you how much I need these nights. We go to concerts, ball games, casinos, or even just camping.
- Don't argue about something that won't matter in one month. If he didn't take out the trash, will that really matter?
- Learn to enjoy each other's bodies. I had gained weight and lost all self-esteem. Once I realized that he wasn't looking for perfection, just attention, things changed. I wasn't happy with what I looked like and o have slowly improved.
My oldest son is getting married. His soon-to-be wife told him he wanted marriage just like his parents had. That told me everything I needed to know. We had made it.
Boiled Down To Communication
After I had my kids I felt like I lost who I was. I was "mom" and that was it. I was permanently exhausted. All my energy was spent on the kids so by the end of the day I just wanted to get into bed and sleep. My husband would stay up late playing computer games. We spent no time together. I nagged him because I felt like I was doing all the work at home.
I also gained a lot of weight during my 2 pregnancies and I didn't lose it afterwards, which made me feel fat and unattractive. It didn't help that my husband seemed to completely lose interest in me. He stopped telling me I was beautiful. He stopped saying "I love you". He has never been a very expressive guy so when that stopped, and he wasn't being physically affectionate with me either, I truly believed that he didn't really love me anymore. It was a bit of a vicious cycle, because the more I felt that way, the more weight I gained and the more terrible I felt about myself. I would always be the one to initiate any intimacy. It completely blew my self-confidence.
While all this was happening I met somebody online (to clarify, it was not on any dating site or anything like that) who I used to chat to regularly. There was nothinginappropriate that happened. It was just sharing about what had happened during the week, getting advice on things, talk about parenting etc. This guy lived on a different continent. I never shared anything about my husband with him, never complained about him etc. He was more like a spiritual mentor. I realized though, that even though nothing inappropriate was going on, it was wrong because without realizing it, I was emotionally investing in somebody else when I should have been using that time and energy to invest in my relationship with my husband. Although I put an end to that, things still didn't improve. I felt like with every month that passed the gulf between us got wider and wider.
I caught my husband looking at porn a number of times, which at the time, was devastating to me. It made me feel even worse about myself...his sex drive was fine, it was just me he wasn't interested in. I took it very personally. He was completely withdrawn from me, and there was actually a point where I worried that he might be having an affair. I was absolutely miserable.
The tipping point came a few years ago, when my husband went snooping online and found some "anonymous" confessions I had made on Scary Mommy confessions (unlucky for me, even though I had never saved any of them, he worked his software engineer magic and knew which ones were mine). It was my place to vent about how crappy I felt about motherhood, about myself and about my marriage (and even about both our families).
When my husband saw them he was devastated. Because he's always had trouble expressing any emotions he wrote me a long letter telling me that he had gone snooping and found them. He told me how hurt he was and how he didn't realize that I had been so unhappy.
A very hard discussion followed, with lots of tears on both sides. Once everything was out in the open things got so much better. He made more of an effort to tell me he loved me and that I was beautiful. He encouraged me to go back to school and to follow my own dreams. I started seeing a personal trainer 3x a week. I also discovered that the reason he doesn't initiate sex very much is not because he doesn't want it, but because he never wants me to feel pressured to do it. Our sex life has been amazing since. We also spoke about love languages.
For us, fixing things really boiled down to communication. I think the key to any good marriage is good, open communication and not letting things build up until you're miserable and full of resentment.
Not Doing This Alone
We had two kids in diapers and we were working opposite schedules so that we could care for them without resorting to daycare.
He called me at work to say "We're both not happy. We should separate."
Without any emotional tears or anything I said
"I'm not f***ing doing this alone so get over yourself."
Then I hung up the phone.
Tomorrow is my 30th anniversary. The kids are grown and successful and we love each other more than we ever have.
- mhol7597
We Got Therapy, We Grew Up
Marriage was a sh!t show. We were both still immature in several ways. Things got bad. There was lying, fighting, yelling, verbal and psychological abuse. Divorce was used as a threat, and so was custody of our kids. Husband was having an emotional affair with his ex wife. We reached a tipping point during an argument in which I was told my opinion was wrong, and I needed to change it or be gone within the week.
I left the next day.
We fought more, we both filed for divorce. We had one hearing where we talked about custody to the judge. Time passes, my lawyer had everything ready to finalize it and all it needed was my signature.
I opted not to have it filed and not to sign.
During the three years we were separated, we continued to talk on the phone. I let him see our kids as much as possible. We were hundreds of miles apart - twelve hours driving. My car would not have made the trip. His was in better condition. He may have been a sh!t husband, but he's always been a good dad. We talked, and talked. We both sought therapy individually. We grew up.
Eventually he moved back, and I moved back in. We've continued to work on our marriage so we never get to where we were.
As for right now? Things are okay. We're not perfect people, but we're making it through.
- iisauser
Workaholic Mama's Boy And The Emotional Affair
I did that cliche movie thing where my husband comes home from work and finds his wife (me) sitting at the kitchen table with a drink gesturing at the other chair like, "Have a seat, we need to talk."
I basically laid out everything that was wrong with our relationship and family life - and there was a lot. I had thought a lot about it all for literal years (married for 9 years at that point), but obviously the communication was so far deteriorated that I hadn't brought any of this up before. He took it very much in stride and said, "That's fixable! I'll fix it!" I was silent and looked down. He said, "Unless... you don't want it to be fixed. Are you telling me you want a separation?"
I had wanted a separation, but I couldn't bring myself to tell him that. This conversation was going differently than I expected. I thought he'd jump at the chance to leave me; I thought he hated me. So, I said, "Well, no." And we talked some more, and made plans to improve our relationship.
Several days after that, we were out having dinner and I was too distracted by my thoughts about our shitty marriage to have a good time. He noticed and asked what was wrong. I said, "You expect everything to improve overnight. Nothing is better. I feel the same." After a bit of angry back and forth, we got the check and stormed home (we live walking distance from the restaurant we were at, so we angrily power walked home, it must have been comedic to people who were watching).
Everything, everything came out that night. All the ways that he had wronged me, as far back as 10 years ago, that he had never apologized for or acknowledged, all the way up to the present. He said, "Why now? Why are you telling me this now? What has changed? Has [longtime friend of mine] pitted you against me for some reason??" And so the truth came out: I said, "I met someone else."
It was true, I'd met someone else and it was mainly an emotional affair, though we exchanged pictures and sexted. But what struck me was how differently they both treated me. I mean, long story short, it was like night and day. To put it very simply, the other guy respected my time and made me feel like I had value as a person separate from making him happy, whereas my husband did not make me feel like that.
I had not wanted to tell my husband about the affair. The other guy and I were not going to get together and were in fact starting to end our relationship, so telling my husband would be just pointless and hurtful. I mainly told him in order to clear my poor friend's name (he really thought she was trying to get me to divorce him) and to put the nail in the coffin of our relationship so I could just move the on.
That was actually the turning point of the evening. He told me that it didn't line up with who he knew me to be - which was a good, honest, faithful person. He said that I must have felt really backed into a corner to turn to infidelity, and that actually made him sit down and examine how he had been acting for the past ten years.
As for how he had been acting: he was a workaholic who had literally zero time for family life including fun interesting conversations about non-work related things. He never came with me to visit my family, hardly spent time with our son, expected me to do everything around the house - which I didn't really mind except he would complain terribly when it wasn't up to his standards instead of just fixing things to his liking without complaining. For example, he would complain to me about a sock being on the floor rather than just picking it up as he walked by.
He didn't listen to anything I said, and I had a running joke where if I wanted to end a conversation, all I had to do was talk longer than 30 seconds because at that point he became very dismissive and would literally walk away. Not in an overtly mean way, more like, "ahah well I've said everything I need to say, and now I'll get back to work" while backing away. Then after a while, whenever this happened, I'd say, "Hah see, this is what happens when I start talking!" and he'd say, "ahah no it isn't" over his shoulder as he was sitting back down at his desk. It didn't really feel like it had any malice behind it, but it was really upsetting anyway. He told me later that he was afraid to spend time on anything that wasn't work. The conversations were usually work related, so when I started talking, the usefulness of it would be over, as I usually expanded the conversation from work to other things often still related to work, but in a less direct way.
He would threaten me with divorce every time we had a fight - I eventually asked him to stop and he more or less did, but occasionally lapsed. His mother lived with us for years and she was incredibly emotionally abusive in ways that I cannot and will not ever forgive- but whenever I brought it up with my husband, he got very defensive, defended her, and said that I was wrong for feeling the way I did. Most hurtful was the fact that he didn't work for a year by choice and despite all of his free time, he did not spend a single day hanging out with me and our son. That was when I was convinced he didn't love me, and that's when I met the other guy, which spearheaded all of this.
After that initial big conversation, we did a LOT of soul searching. I went on a trip planned long in advance, to visit my family (it was one of those family trips that he never took with me, so he didn't have a ticket and therefore didn't come along). During our time apart, we thought a LOT about what we wanted from our marriage and each other and whether we were willing to work on things, whether we were able to come back from the hurt we'd caused each other. We spent a lot of time texting and on the phone. On the day I was supposed to come back, we were both pacing and debating whether we actually wanted to see each other again.
We decided to stay together and make it work. He has a better work life balance, and does things around the house. I speak up when things bother me. We have conversations about things that aren't work related. He values what I say. He apologized for the way his mom treated me, and for not acknowledging how hurtful it was - which made me feel like a huge load was lifted from my spirit. He said that he didn't even realize that's how he was acting all those years - that he was acting like a person he never wanted to be. I believe him. I always knew he had a good heart. I feel like his behavior now matches with who he is on the inside.
I didn't know our marriage could be as good as it is now; if I had, I definitely would have tried to have that conversation years ago, preferably without the infidelity.
A Breast Reduction Changed Everything
I had surgery. I know it sounds weird.
I'm a female, make the most money, work the most, etc. My husband also works but has very few skills and smokes weed a lot because of back pain, so any time he DOES get an interview for something better, they drug test and he doesn't get the job.
We also have a son with autism. We aren't having more kids. When my son turned 8 I got my tubes cut out so I couldn't. Every day is exhausting and honestly, neither of us were happy. I never wanted sex because I was tired, he wanted it all the time. He snapped about everything, I shut down about everything. We had our 10 year anniversary and I knew I wanted a divorce.
I has a breast reduction because of pain issues that were affecting my work. That surgery is serious stuff. I prepared myself for having to go at my recovery with no help. I was delusional. I was a mess afterwards. I didn't want to ask him for help at all.
He turned into a different person. He helped me in the bathroom, took me in the shower to help me, drove me to all of my appointments, made me food, checked on me every 20 mins. Never once did he get impatient with me.
4 weeks after my surgery I felt really lovely from my surgery. I was in a good mood, I liked how I looked in the mirror. I asked him if he liked how I looked. He looked like a dog staring at a treat. I told him I wanted sex.
Ever since then, things are TOTALLY different. I don't know exactly what happened. Maybe him realizing that attention to me matters and showing care, and I realized I needed to give up control. Now we make a little date time. We have sex 1-2 times a week (It had been about once a month before). We laugh with each other. I talk to him when I'm frustrated instead of trying to solve everything by myself. But it's pretty awesome.
Getting Sober
Long story short, I was a very heavy drinker for 15+ years. Verbally abusive to my wife when drunk. Wife lost her father from cancer the same year we married. Lost her mother the following year due to unknown cause, possibly heart issue. We had a kid. June 2016, my wife's sister gave birth, then unexpectedly, her sister died a week later. I started drinking more heavily and ramped up my verbal abuse. My wife suppressed her feelings and said she was "used to death now."
End of August 2016, she says she wants a marriage break. I didn't want a break. Early September 2016 I decide to quit drinking cold turkey (average 15 drinks a day down to 0) and start working out. One week later, I find out she's having an affair. The affair continued for 6 months on and off, but I maintained my sobriety and tried to convince her I changed the whole time. She never believed me and expected me to revert back to my old ways. December 2016, we were headed for divorce. February 2017, the affair had ended a month prior, she's gone thru a lot of therapy at this point (she started going weekly in November 2016), and we decided to try and give our marriage another shot. We did marriage counseling bi weekly and started to get to know the new us, individually and as a couple. That April, I started school again after a 10 year hiatus.
Today, 9/27/18, I'm down to 170lbs from 220 (this weight was actually all lost in the first couple months after finding out about the affair), I'm 80% of the way done with my bachelor's degree, wife and I are more in love than we ever have been since knowing each other, and we're expecting our second child in one week! I'm still sober with no outside help. I did it in silence and I'm damn proud of myself! 2 years ago at this time, I wouldn't have believed this was possible, but I pushed thru and I'm making good decisions, finally!
I was a dick and didn't deserve the beautiful woman who put up with my daily drinking and verbal abuse for over 5 years. She shouldn't have cheated and maybe some think I should have cut my ties, but I made the choices I made and I stand by them. I love her. My Wife and I finally found our true selves and our marriage is stronger than it's every been. We were both in the wrong for different reasons, but we worked hard and fixed everything that we could.
Just wanted to get this off my chest because I feel accomplished. I'm finally happy with my life and where it's going for the first time since youth.
Keep your head up, most bullsh!t in life is just a phase unless you make it bigger than it should be. Stay focused.
H/T: Reddit
People are required to have a license to drive, fish, and have certain jobs.
So it boggles my mind that people aren't required to have a license to have kids.
Some of the cruelest and most vicious things I've ever heard were words uttered by a parent to a child.
As an adult, I was haunted by a few thigs.
I can't imagine the scaring of an adolescent.
Redditor Tight_Anywhere6794 wanted to hear about the things parents have said in the past that haunts everyone still, so they asked:
"What insult have your parents said, that is stuck in your head as an adult?"
I've been blessed with the mother I had.
So I can't speak from experience.
But I've heard parenting horror stories.
Bad Expressions
Sad Kid GIF by 1tvGiphy“'You’re so annoying.' Said to me as a young kid while I was expressing enthusiasm over some new interest. Later my father complains I never tell him anything."
foppishyyy
Mean Spirited
"What did I do to deserve a fat kid?"
Silosolo
"My parents also mocked me for being fat, and outright physically abused me as in forcefully grabbed my fat child manboobs or slapped me while calling me fat-related names."
"A lot of people at school did it too, so obviously I have a lot of self-image issues like I never let anyone see me without clothes these days. The worst part is that I legitimately internalized a lot of hate, I could never care for myself enough to actually get fit."
FoeWithBenefits
What's My Name?
"My parents divorced when I was young and they hate each other. My mom would call me my dad's name when she was really upset. What makes it worse is that I confided in her that I never wanted to be like my dad. She used that ammunition against me."
Discarded_Pariah
"That's awful. You are your own person. You aren't your father."
blksmnr
Unfunny
"'You can't even laugh right.'"
"My mom in a weird moment I thought we were bonding. There's something inherently extra evil when someone tells you your joy is wrong. Told her I'm engaged and hoped she could at least be happy I'm happy and she ghosted everyone to the point the family thought died. She's a mess."
BlindEditor
"I'll never understand parents that are so hard on their own children that they can't even be happy for them. So their sole function is to bring misery to their offspring?"
macabre_irony
Evil
Oh My God Wow GIF by The Roku ChannelGiphy"My little brother was drowning, I tried to save him but also almost drowned, we got rescued by a neighbor. My mom told me that they should've left me in the pond. I haven't spoken to her in many years."
Ilookbetterthanyou
Good Lord. How do people like this exist?
Tragic.
HIM
"She told me I was acting just like my father when I would get upset. I would just get kinda pissy and sulk. He would go on rampages and scream and hit and throw things. He pushed her down the stairs once. I would never lay a finger on my current partner. The worst part is I look just like him. I was wondering if my mother always expected me to turn into my dad. I prove her wrong every day."
rot_grl
10 Years Old
"When I was ~10 years old, my mum once said 'If I could go back in time and make sure I never gave birth to you, I would in a heartbeat.'"
"Never forgot it. Talked to her about it a couple of times years later and her responses ranged from 'That never happened' to 'Oh yeah and I suppose I’m just the worst mother ever' and finally 'Yeah but I didn’t mean it, you know that.'"
"Messed me up tho tbh. Another one was '[older sibling] was the only child we actually planned for, the rest of you were accidents.' I don’t think it was intended as an insult, but being told your entire existence was an accident as a child kinda stung."
SpiderP*bes
Failures
“'You’re the biggest mistake I ever made.' - my mother when I was 5. I’m 32 now and it’s been the undercurrent for our relationship ever since, constantly wondering if anything I’ve achieved or struggled for is something she’s genuinely proud of or just relieved to say I wasn’t a total failure on her part."
thefaehost
Generational Issues
"Not a parent but a grandparent, I was adopted when I was 12 years old (my parents were both drug addicts so I was in and out of foster care most of my life) my adopted mother's father turned to me on Christmas Eve when no one else was around and said 'My daughter should have never adopted you, she should have let you stay on the streets where you belong'… he got nicer as he got older and sicker but I couldn’t find it in myself to forget what he said even almost 10 years later. Went to the funeral for moral support but was indifferent about his passing."
samweather227
Just Me
Sad Kids GIF by Cian DucrotGiphy"I was an only child and lonely. When I asked for a sibling, the response was 'If you want to know why we don't have more kids, go look in the mirror.'"
Responsible_Fly_3565
Some people should never have children.
Awful.
A tough realization that most of us have to process and accept at some point is the fact that our parents lied to us when we were kids.
But the tougher fact to process may not be the lying itself, but some of the lies that were told along the way.
Redditor Fearless-surfur-ee asked:
"What was the biggest lie you believed?"
Adulting 101
"That adults knew what they were doing."
- yukipurple
"Maybe not ALL adults, but I definitely thought that adults with responsible jobs have their s**t together. Then I realized they do not have their s**t together at all."
"Which in turn makes me feel somewhat better about being an adult with a responsible job who does not have their s**t together."
- kjhwkejhkhdsfkjhsdkf
Moving Violations
"It’s illegal to turn on the dome light while the vehicle is moving."
"Nope. Turns out it’s just annoying as h**l."
- OstrichMan975
A Lottery Trick
"When I was a kid, my cousin convinced me for, like, an hour that her mom had won the lottery. I can still feel the loss of millions of dollars two decades later, and that s**t hurts, bro."
"WHY, JESSICA, WHY?!"
- iforgotwhereiparked
That Truth Hurts
"I’ll fill up my car with gas before work tomorrow morning."
- hoangtudude
"I will do stuff like this for my fiancé in a heartbeat, but if I need to fill up my own gas tank to avoid doing it tomorrow? That sounds like a problem for future me."
- robbviously
When That Grief Hits Seven Years Later...
"My mom told me when I was five and my favorite dog died that it doesn't matter that dogs die, because in seven years, they respawn."
"So I was like, 'Oh, fine. See you then, bud, I will be older, and we will play again.'"
- josevilla7
Replacement Pets
"My hamster died while I was in school. Went back home, and I instantly saw he was a little bit different."
"My mum tricked me into thinking it was the same hamster and he hadn't changed a bit."
"Mom told me the truth a few years later. I was so p**sed off."
- changethename7
"My mom has done the same thing with my nephew’s parakeet. One day, Pickles #1 flew into the pantry, somehow got stuck in a case of Diet Coke, and got crushed by a can avalanche."
"He was immediately replaced by Pickles #2. My nephew asked why Pickles was so mean to him now. Pickles #2 is an a**hole."
"I’m suspicious that we are on Pickles #3 now but I don’t want to know for sure."
- Brotox123
"My mother's cousin did that with her little boy's rabbit."
"The new rabbit was a psychopath. Having his previously loving rabbit now hate him and repeatedly attack him was almost certainly more traumatizing than learning about death."
"I always wondered if stories like that were part of the inspiration for 'Pet Sematary.'"
- victoriaj
Just in Case
"The microwave will explode if I put my face too close to it while it’s heating food."
- ezzysalazar
A SUPER Secret Affair
"That my parents were married."
"The truth is, my father was, just not to my mother."
- left_over_croissant
A Creative Story
"That my dad moved out and rented a room in the house of a female friend for tax reasons."
- Eldhannas
Such Good Friends
"Outside of dumb lies your parents tell you as kids, my friend who worked at a gas station with a big food station that has some ground beef items told me they use kangaroo meat for their ground beef because it was cheaper than cow."
"I am gullible with my friends."
- _Goose_
The Lie That Keeps Going
"When I was 15, over my summer break, one day my mom called and said she was gonna pick me up and we were gonna go to my stepdad's for the weekend."
"I didn’t understand why I had to go when she would leave me at home by myself for the weekend all the time. I was old enough that I knew the rules and she could trust me."
"She told me there was a mixup at the electrical company and they seem to think we didn’t pay the bill and so the power was gonna be shut off, so we were gonna go to my stepdad's until that got sorted."
"That was a lie."
"A weekend turned into two weeks, which turned into a month, and then the entire summer. We hadn’t been home in over two months. I kept asking when we could go home and she’d always have an excuse."
"We reached September, she’s driving me from one city to my hometown to register for the following year of school, which started up in a week, and this was the closest I had been to home in two months! After I registered, we bypassed my house and started heading towards the highway to go back to my stepdad’s."
"It was at that moment I snapped and started freaking out! I knew something was wrong."
"She pulled the car over and started crying. Apparently, my brother had been helping her pay the bills and when he moved out, she could no longer afford the place on her own. So my stepdad was trying to help but he had his own house and kids he had to look after, and he couldn’t keep it up. We had been evicted."
"We stayed with my stepdad for the summer while my mom tried to work something out with the landlord, but they couldn’t come to an arrangement. Because she never told me, and in order to buy herself time to work something out, she had to be comfortable with potentially leaving EVERYTHING behind…"
"Well, she couldn’t work it out with the landlord and we lost EVERYTHING. The only thing I got out of that house was the shoes on my feet and a few outfits and pajamas enough for a weekend stay."
"My mother wanted to keep the lie going for as long as she could to buy herself time that she had to leave behind everything to keep it going. She never went back for anything, so eventually I can only assume it was all thrown away."
"So not only did I lose material belongings like my computer, my video games, and all my clothes, but I lost basic things like my own bedroom… and privacy as a teenager! I slept on my stepdad’s couch for almost two years until his daughters moved out and I took over their old room."
"But I also lost sentimental things like childhood pictures/videos, the memory box I started when I was seven, and the porcelain dolls my dad had given me over the years, he bought me two per year (birthday and Christmas,) and now that my dad is dead, those are things I wish I still had."
- Neikitia
An Elaborate Tale
"When I was very young, we had a pet hamster. He got out of his cage, so my dad put the cage in the basement, thinking he might get hungry and get back in."
"One morning I woke up and there was the hamster in his cage in the usual place. I asked my mom how they found him and she told me she opened the door to the cellar and there he was dragging his cage back upstairs."
"It wasn't until I was a teenager and remembered the exchange that it occurred to me she obviously made that up."
- censorized
Too Real
"That acne would only be a problem when I was a teenager."
- McGamers56
"I started breaking out in the third grade and haven't had clear skin since. I'll be 27 pretty soon. This one hits home."
- bayleenator
Part of the Family
"When I was like 16, I found out that one of my sisters wasn’t actually my sister. She was actually just best friends with my oldest sister growing up, and she lived with my family from when she was 12 or 13 through 18 (she and my oldest sister are 15 years older than me)."
"Unfortunately, her parents wouldn’t sign her over for adoption and didn’t contribute anything to my mom raising her for six years."
"The weirdest part is that my family is predominantly fair-skinned, blonde with blue eyes, but the girl I thought was my sister was traditional Hispanic with darker skin, dark hair, and brown eyes. My mom was always very tan and had darker skin and hair throughout my childhood, so I thought that my other two sisters and myself were the odd ones out."
- Schleeeeeem
The Deepest Betrayal of All
"On April Fool's while I was getting ready for school on a cold winter day, my mom told me, 'School is canceled! It's a snow day!'"
"I ran around for a good two minutes celebrating before she told me, 'April Fools!'"
"I've never felt so betrayed in my life."
- samivat
"You better be a mastermind supervillain by now."
- T_WREKX
"Thank you for sharing your Joker origin story, lol (laughing out loud)."
- JulienS2000
These lies have a wide range from the hilarious to the absolutely diabolical, maybe even with a few villain origin stories thrown in.
A common thread throughout most of these was someone telling a lie in order to avoid a tougher conversation, which only led the younger person to have a lot more to process later.
With theaters finally open to those wanting the ultimate entertainment experience that streaming movies at home can't provide, the pandemic that kept many venues closed now feels like a distant memory.
There's nothing like seeing a film up on the big screen the way Hollywood studios intended, and many would argue that experience is worth shelling out the cash for.
That being said, there is no assurance audiences will remain in their seats until the credits roll at the end.
Because not all movies are created equal. Some are just embarrassingly bad and not worth sticking around for.
Curious to hear from dissatisfied moviegoers, Redditor girlcalledmariaaria asked:
"If you have ever walked out of a cinema because the film was so bad, what one was it?"
These Redditors had no idea what they were in for.
Wrong Expectations
"I've not, but when I saw In Bruges, an elderly couple walked out after 20 minutes and I heard the man muttering that this wasn't a film about Belgium at all. It really tickled me."
– Reverend-JT
Regretful Decision
"Holmes & Watson, my family really enjoyed step Brothers and Talladega nights. So I shouted the 5 of us to the movies on Christmas day because for some reason the cinemas were open and it was showing and we don't really do big celebrations. 15 minutes into the movie we all looked at each other like.. wtf is this. I tried to leave.. I went to ask for a refund because their policy said you can get a refund 30 minutes into the movie... But we were 5 minutes late because of the 20 minute trailers.. I'm still seething about spending $100 to basically die of boredom for an hour and a half. I was sitting there embarrassed about suggesting the family outing. My family stuck it out because I'd paid for it and couldn't get a refund even though I told them I didnt care and begged to leave."
– jande425
Plan B
"I've got a story of a film my friends and I refused to leave, actually."
"In 2006 I was turning 14 and was obsessed with Pirates of the Caribbean. My mom threw a pirates-themed birthday party where my friends and I were meant to go to see Dead Man's Chest, which was still in theaters in August when the party was. We dressed up for it and everything."
"Well for some reason the showing we were going to see was packed despite the movie having been out over a month, so there weren't 12 tickets available. My mother (and my friend's mom who came along) made a split second decision to see the next PG-13 rated movie available."
"Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby."
"So a gaggle of 14 year old girls dressed as pirates walked into this theatre to a bunch of weird looks, but we sat down with our popcorn as normal. The next hour-and-a-halfish saw the moms be horrified at the crass nature of the film and keep asking if we wanted to leave. The answer was a HELL NO from the whole group. That movie proceeded to be the basis of our inside jokes for the next 4 years. To this day it's one of our collective favorite grade school memories, even if my mother continues to be embarrassed by it."
– fraxiiinus
Whether it was physical or emotional, these films didn't sit well with Redditors.
Saving Our Necks
"Oh, I remember vividly. It was Battlefield Earth."
"The shot angles kept being tilted this way and that for no reason and I started tilting my head so that things would be level. Then my friend joined in. Then we simultaneously were like 'are we going to cramp our necks for THIS?' And walked out."
– Ahlq802
Punishment For Sneaking In
"I walked out of 28 days later. Not because it was bad. I was 9 years old and snuck in and it was freaking me the f'k out.. watched it years later and enjoyed it."
– OMGi_hafta_poop
Oh, The Horror
"I saw Prometheus twice in theaters. At the second show, a group of 10-year-olds snuck in. The first R-rated scene, which features an alien worm/snake that crawls inside someone's shattered arm, caused these kids to flee the theater in an absolute panic. I imagine they will never forget that day."
– fleur_delyk
Sometimes, it's the theater's fault.
Failed Attempts
"I went to see Guardians of the Galaxy, and they played Rise of the Guardians."
"It took about five minutes to realize it was the wrong movie the first time. They tried to fix it, played Rise again, tried to fix it, played Rise a third time, and the whole theater walked out for refunds."
"Apparently it was a issue at a lot of theaters."
– MandolinMagi
Not A Prank
"I guess this technically counts but when I went to see deadpool 2, the cinema accidentally put the wrong film on and played some Amy Schumer film instead. Everyone in the screen thought it was some meta deadpool joke and out of nowhere he’d appear and shoot Amy Schumer so we were all waiting on that. After about 10 minutes of the film, the staff came into the screen and explained that they had put the wrong film on and couldn’t undo it because of their tight schedule etc but we would all get a refund and were welcome to stay and watch the rest of the Amy Schumer film. Everyone left."
– KMeech1969
Other times, the movie itself doesn't screen well for the audience.
Far From Purr-fect
"I’ve never walked out of a movie and I saw Cats opening weekend."
– Man_Bear_Pig25
"I walked out on it, but then decided I wanted to be back inside. They let me back in, but then I walked out again."
– CatherineOfArrogance
I'm all for supporting the arts.
But if a movie I already paid a non-refundable admission for was absolutely terrible, I'd have no problem forfeiting the cash to spare my sanity and walking out of the theater.
The one time I did just that was when I went to see The Island of Doctor Moreau starring Marlon Brando and Val Kilmer.
I was a kid and I was thrilled to go see a movie all by myself.
Unfortunately, the sci-fi horror film wasn't enough to captivate my short attention span.
I walked out and subsequently called my mom to pick me up from the mall where the movie theater was.
Those were the days...
If there was one good thing to come out of the pandemic, it was that it made us all the more appreciative of all that is good in our lives.
No one ever appreciated the importance of friends or family more, having to be kept apart from each other for months, or the little things which bring us joy, which we made sure to keep doing even as pandemic restrictions were lifted.
Of course, being alone with our thoughts for such a long time also resulted in our reflecting on things in our lives, or in the world in general, which we were less than happy about.
Not to mention the all-important realization that life is short and precious, and we don't have time to waste our thoughts on some things.
"What is something you no longer have patience for?"
Off The Clock Means OFF THE CLOCK!
"Working outside of work hours."
"I used to go above and beyond, now I only put in what is required."
"Life is too short to live only to work."- Chesterfieldcat
"The working world."
"My life doesn’t revolve around working here and it never will."
"It will never be a part of my identity."
"I come in, do the job, make money, go home."
"Don’t expect me to come to all the work happy hours so I can pretend how much I love working here."- nuclearsalt
Some Things Just Don't Get A Free Pass
"Sh*tty people getting a pass 'because they're family'."- cgulash
angry homer simpson GIFGiphySay What You Mean, Not What You Feel
"Having to guess what people REALLY mean by something they said."
"I take everything people say at face value now and don't replay conversations in my head to find out the real meaning anymore."
"Be passive-aggressive if you want to but talk to me like an adult if you really have a problem."- WateredDownSalt
EYES ON THE ROAD!
"People who text and drive."
"You're driving a giant piece of metal propelled by explosive liquid."
"Pay attention."- MasterfulNothasie
The Only Life That Should Concern You Is Your Own
"People and groups of people that only talk about other people."- Turf98
"People who can’t mind their fucking business and are always worried about what other people are doing."
"If it doesn’t effect you, f*ck off."
"It’s literally free."- wackwackwackjpg
GIF by WWEGiphySome People Didn't Mind Social Distancing
"People invading my personal space."- Mighty-Foreskin
Influence Can Be Dangerous
"Anything that has “influencer” in it."- chemistcarpenter
Indoor Voices People...
"Streamers screaming, losing their sh*t, breaking things, and having tantrums."
"I used to think this was so funny now I just can't stand it; I can't even watch a streamer if I notice they're not using their normal talking voice." - Reddit
Fail Oh No GIF by G2 EsportsGiphyTaking Responsibility Is A Sign Of Maturity
"People who constantly blame others for the situation they are in."- SuvenPan
Time Is Precious And Shouldn't Be Wasted
"Waiting on people who are constantly late to plans."
"I will wait 15 minutes then excuse myself."- Dabbles-In-Irony
There's Multi-Tasking, And Then There's Just Being Rude...
"People being on their phone while in a conversation with you."
"Seriously."
"Put your phone away!"- rosieblinkstime
Phone GIF by Poehlmann FitnessGiphyIt Takes So Much More Effort To Be Nasty...
"Bad manners, unkindness and general rudeness."
"It costs nothing to be a nice person and from someone who works in a customer-facing industry, attitudes, sadly, appear to be getting worse."
"It really makes me cross."- Bellamiles85
At Least They're Being Transparent
"Medicine commercials with worse side-effects than the thing being cured."- mrbbrj
Wasting our time and thoughts about things that we know can only bring us down is simply no way to get through life.
It's essential to live our lives by taking the present moment for what it is: a present.