Couples Reveal How They Overcome Awkward Obstacles In Their Relationships[rebelmouse-image 18347564 is_animated_gif=
At a baseline, bringing two people together creates an inherently different environment for the two individuals to deal with. And then jealousy can easily rear its ugly head. Love is a great equalizer, but the awkward obstacles still have to be surmounted.
So an anonymous Reddit user appropriately came with the question:
Couples with a very significant achievement gap, be it academic, professional, financial, intellectual, or any other you can think of that may fit, how do you live with each other without feeling like two aliens?
And the internet came back with good advice.
Team Players[rebelmouse-image 18347565 is_animated_gif=
I have 2 degrees and work as a lawyer. My husband never finished uni but has a job that he loves. He's a great father and husband. It doesn't really matter that I earn more than him because it's all just family money. We're both working hard and supporting each other and our kids.
Finding someone that you respect as a person is way more important than the status bullsh-t of degrees and cash. I'd take my husband over a hundred high earners. Just because he didn't get a piece of paper doesn't mean that he's not intelligent, and just because he doesn't earn as much doesn't mean he's not successful. Without his support I'm sure I wouldn't be where I am.
Just find someone who wants to be in your team. Forget keeping score.
The Shared Plan[rebelmouse-image 18347566 is_animated_gif=
I think being fair and honest with each other and taking care of which areas of the relationship you are better suited/equipped to do. The whole idea of a relationship to me is that you're better off combined than as individuals.
For example: in our relationship I work in IT and she's a teacher. I make four times what she does so we split all bills etc. by that ratio. She contributes in a meaningful but manageable way. I pay for most of the "extra" expenses (e.g. holidays) and I bought her a laptop, but she doesn't feel like a kid as she's still involved in the majority of "living expenses" expenditure (and it's not my home, it's ours).
Alternatively, she's at least 374 times smarter than I am and far better educated (bilingual with a top-tier Uni education). She makes the decisions around things like housing (her dad's an architect so she knows what's what) plus things like education for our future kids, as that's obviously an area she knows far more about than me.
The guilt of me knowing she works longer hours and is smarter but makes way less than me is a bit hard to stomach sometimes. I was lucky to fall into an industry which is in demand and has good rewards. We were both pretty poor when we met, so that helps.
Overall though, we have a shared long-term plan - the details of how we get there are less important. My success is her success, and vice versa.
Mutual Respect[rebelmouse-image 18347567 is_animated_gif=
I have a doctorate in my field and make almost 200k more than my husband yearly. He helped me get through school and pretty much raised our children on his own while I climbed up the ladder. It wasn't just my achievement, it was ours. I don't know many men that would have sacrificed as much as he did. Our marriage is strong because of mutual respect and admiration. If that doesn't exist, I don't see how the relationship can work.
Achievement Is Not A Factor[rebelmouse-image 18347568 is_animated_gif=
She has a very technical degree in a small field, and so she makes approximately twofold as much as I do. Fortunately, all that means is we, as a couple, do alright. Personal achievement isn't a defining factor in our relationship. What we do at work, what we did during school, personally, wasn't really a part of who we are. It's actually kind of weird to think that other people might view that as 'alien'.
Treat Them Like Your Equal[rebelmouse-image 18347569 is_animated_gif=
I make 2x what she makes. She refuses to let me pay her half of stuff so I'm basically just saving half of what I make because doing stuff alone is boring and I have to fit her budget. Lucky for her I love her so she is just saving for retirement by making me save. (She loves her job so I'll probably retire at 60 and do my own projects while she keeps working.)
Find Common Ground[rebelmouse-image 18347571 is_animated_gif=
I'm a cook. She's a doctor. We are both intelligent, share the same interests and love each other as people. Also, there's honestly more in common between the ER folks and Kitchen folks then I would have ever imagined. Both professions drink and smoke too much, cuss too much and generally f-cking hate people.
Complements[rebelmouse-image 18347573 is_animated_gif=
It's a partnership as much as a relationship. Love can't keep you together, but honest, kind, communication can. Part of being a partner is absorbing your partners bad days, and helping celebrate success.
My wife has a Phd. I have a high school diploma. She works for a really great job. I'm a stay at home dad. She's always out earned me (rightfully so. I'd be upset for her if I were making more in retail than she is with a phd).
I never put much thought to it. In her field she knows her sh-t inside and out, as you'd expect. But she can't cook, clean, or do yard work for sh-t. To the point I can't wrap my head around it. How you do char boiled eggs? Our talents and success are ours, but they complement each other. Even if we weren't married, we would be a good team.
Honesty it's only as hard as maintaining a happy marriage. Not that it's easy, but you use the same tools.
If you do feel resentment, you're gonna have to learn to let it go. Do that by finding out why you have resentment. Once you find out why, you may find out you can't ever change it and the opportunity you're pining for is gone forever. Gotta let it go. Whatever the problem is, you're gonna have to let it go. You can't live in resentment forever, and it'll fester and infect the rest of the relationship. Let it go.
It's A Partnership[rebelmouse-image 18347575 is_animated_gif=
I spent 30 years doing computer systems work and had some pretty high paying positions, as well as achieving a pretty high degree of personal and professional success.
My wife mostly babysat during the time our kids were growing up then had a pretty good career with the government although she never got very high, not starting till she was over 40.
She did express some jealousy on occasion at how "smart" I was and how well I was doing but I never, ever made that an issue. We're a team, she took care of the kids, I brought in the moola.
I've heard of people who think marriages are supposed to be 50/50 but that is so much bullsh-t, it's not even technically possible. Marriage is no a contest, like I said, it's a partnership, two people working toward a common goal. Sometimes you give more, something they give more, it's not worth worrying about.
We Love Each Other For More Than Our Gaps[rebelmouse-image 18347579 is_animated_gif=
We love each for other reasons than the key gap. So in the end we get past this.
Gap - she has an MSc Management - I have no degree and did not go to university.
Gap 2 - she is a lady of leisure - I work and earn a lot of money with no degree.
The only time it becomes an issue is talking about future child's education. She is adamant that we force our kid into university. I am against the forcing - if kid wants university great. If kid would rather do a private professional qualification/ apprenticeship then ok.
I am only going to stop my child from "doing nothing that could better their life".
Wife hates that, I think she sees it as a dig at her saying her degree is not worth anything. She is not from the UK so can't understand even after marrying me how a lot of people can excel in the UK without degrees.
So we either argue about it infrequently or do not talk about it. Tbh there is no point in talking about it until we have a sense of what child and their abilities they have.
Apart from that - we enjoy lots of the same things and share the same views and have the same life goals - our own home, a child, a pet, travelling to see the world a new place each year, taking care of Our families.
The Importance Of The Work[rebelmouse-image 18345701 is_animated_gif=
I have a Master's degree and make more than $80,000 in the Public Relations field.
My wife has no degrees - just a certificate from a community college and makes about $20,000 a year working part time.
But that certificate is in nursing, and she works in home hospice -- providing comfort to people as they die, helping their family members through the grieving process, etc all in the comfort of the dying person's home.
So while I make a lot more money, her work is inifinitely more important than mine is.
Always The Money[rebelmouse-image 18347580 is_animated_gif=
My wife currently makes a lot more money than me. I make some, but she does pretty well. She is also about to get her PhD and I didn't even finish college.
However, I work extremely hard at what I do, and I am getting better, and I know it will really pay off in the end. She sees that too and supports me. I support her in every other imaginable way. She is very type A and can get stressed, emotional, and overwhelmed, and sometimes just needs me to sit there and let her vent or hold her. We have become best friends, and as cliche as it may sound, we do complete each other in many ways.
On top of that, we share some things in common: we both love running, and we love our dogs to death (we met in a dog park). Good food and whiskey, lounging around reading, and hanging out with friends. I really don't know how I got such an incredibly beautiful and intelligent woman to marry me, but I will do all I can to support her and do my own thing so we can share a wonderful life.
Hard Work[rebelmouse-image 18347581 is_animated_gif=
I am 38 and my wife is 31. She has 3 graduate degrees in the STEM fields, 2 from ivy league type schools. She is now working on her 4th graduate degree in some type of computer science I do not understand. I never attended high school, and had to lie and make a fake high school transcript to get into college, where I have never completed even one full year. Mostly because I can not pass a math course which is 2 of my wife's degrees. We now have a kid, and have been married 7 years July 2017. We are very completely different people in completely different worlds.
I am not sure how we have made it work. She is somewhere on the autistic scale and I am very outgoing and social. I think we understand our own and each others limitations, and are understanding those boundaries more and more every day. She is a college professor and doing well at it, while I stay at home and play a support role. I never had a career or a future, so nothing really there to give up or miss. The best job I ever had was working construction for a low voltage company. 60+ hard hours every week with shitty pay and no benefits. Being a dad and a loving husband has given my life purpose I thought I would never have. I am pretty sure she feels and understands that she would not be able to work as hard and achieve what she has while having a family with out someone like me at her side.
Some tips; find something you both really really enjoy and force yourself to do it together on a very regular basis. For us it was video and table top gaming. We both love it, and play very differently so it makes for some interesting and heated gaming.
Use sex as a tool for bonding. Having a good line of communication is difficult for us, being so different. We have found for us that sex can be a good place for us to enjoy each other being each other. Levels of education or experience or history seems to melt away when passion rises.
The last one I can think of is listen and try and understand. Nothing makes my wife happier than when I make an effort to try and understand what shes talking about. There is also the extra bonus of over the decade or so of knowing her, I have learned quite a bit more than I thought I ever would about the STEM fields.
Now the bad. We do feel like aliens sometimes. We see things differently, and recently discovering how differently we parent. We do fight, maybe more than some. There are going to be things that will always be an issue, like having proper communication and understanding. Every relationship has to be built on compromise and hard work to make it last.
Gaps In Knowledge[rebelmouse-image 18347080 is_animated_gif=
My boyfriend is in a full time job in the type of work he studied for. I am finishing my degree, still.
It definitely becomes difficult with three major factors: Time management, money and maturity.
Time is uncomfortable because I feel like I have so much more free time than him, but then to counter that I work a part time job that takes all of my Sunday. This just needs to be organized around, and I think it's important for the person who's working full time to never assume the other is less busy just because they are not physically clocking in and out at the end of the day.
Money is self-explanatory. He makes money, I hemorrhage it out of my broke, broke pockets. For this I think there needs to be a balance of a show of self-sufficiency on my part, and a show of both generosity but also full belief I can do it "on my own" on his part. Talking openly about financial differences is good, and I personally appreciate when it's acknowledged that he lives a much less anxiety-driven life because money is not an immediate concern for him. This dynamic would change if I were to move in with him, but it would still be about willing to spend a "percentage of what we have" to make things work.
Finally, maturity. Sometimes I feel like I sound like a child when I talk to him about my university shit while he's out there actually being a person and having a job, and the only way this can be cured is understanding that your partner, well, loves you. They would not be dating you if they did not think you were a strong, capable person, especially if they are from a position with a lot more status/power/authority/what have you.
This is a valid question, and I have definitely struggled with it a lot in my own time.
Kindness Over Talent[rebelmouse-image 18347582 is_animated_gif=
My dad was a working-class genius. He didn't have any advantages in life (like the ones I have an frankly squander) but he quite literally is a hero, he overcame them and did some great things.
My mom is the most wonderful loving woman in the world, but on occasion not that bright. I don't think she ever made more than maybe 15 dollars an hour in her life slaving away in a job she hated, different kind of hero.
The difference between them was/is huge. But you wouldn't know it really, unless you got to know my dad.
Once my mom said something really stupid, and I was about the stupid age of 12 or 13 where I knew she was wrong, and I was arrogant enough to think it was cool to call her out on it. My dad heard me sort of arguing with her. He came in, asked what was going on, and then he said something like, "Bill just leave it alone." and he kissed my mom and gave me this look and a sort of head motion like "you better come with me or you're f-cked" so I did.
He told me something like, "Son, your mom is a good woman, I know she isn't the smartest woman but she's one of the best. Let her be happy. You have no idea how lucky you are to have someone who really loves you. Don't f-ck that up by arguing about shit that doesn't matter."
Adore[rebelmouse-image 18347583 is_animated_gif=
My husband is really really smart, and I'm not. He grew up with a very upperclass family, and I grew up under the bluest of collars and the strappiest of boots.
Over time we've had to have a lot of conversations, as I have felt insecure about my intelligence and class around his family in the past.
BUT! THEN I realized that I know how to change a tire, change our own oil, fix the lawn care equipment, clean every mess, and I'm generally a more organized person. I know how to put the work in until something is completed. So I stopped worrying so much, because my husband sure wasn't worried about it.
It's led to some stressful situations with my in-laws before, but at the end of the day, all you can say is f*** it. Plus, for some reason, my husband adores blue collar life way more.
It's give and take.
Again, Being Equals[rebelmouse-image 18347584 is_animated_gif=
I was a high school teacher and now I'm a SAHM. My husband is an environmental engineer who makes (low) six figures. When I was teaching, I brought home ~20k. We pooled all of our money and didn't differentiate. Even now when I'm not working, we have an equal amount of weekly "personal spending" money we don't have to explain or account for in our budget. I absolutely would not have agreed to stay home if my husband and I didn't share these beliefs about finances.
He values the domestic work I do as much as a monetary contribution to the household. The work I do at home during the week (cleaning, largely, but errands and cooking and so on as well) means that our evenings and weekends are straight-up leisure time for our family. When I was working, we often spent weekends playing catch-up on chores and errands (and grading!) instead of relaxing.
I'll go back to work when the baby is a few years old, but we both really value a few years of parent-controlled education and discipline in the home (vs. daycare or a relative providing child care).
Ultimately, it comes down to mutual values and a shared vision for our lifestyle, and understanding that our roles are very different and symbiotic. Moreover, though, he respects, appreciates, and admires my work as equal to his.
This Sounds Familiar[rebelmouse-image 18347585 is_animated_gif=
She is an immigrant aspiring model and I am a celebrity billionaire who is also the president of the United States of America. We don't always see eye to eye, but luckily she is always able to stay in our New York skyscraper. Also she wouldn't divorce me no matter what I did because when she looks at me she essentially sees a giant orange old gremlin standing in the way of her billions of dollars - and I'll be dead pretty soon.
It's a good system.
Make Someone Happy[rebelmouse-image 18346617 is_animated_gif=
My wife has a college degree and can speak 5 languages with actual fluency. She gets every job she applies for and tries to get.
I have no degree, speak English only with fluency, have struggled to find work. However, I'm funny, computer savvy, can open tight jars, I make her laugh and happy. It's equal because we make each other happy and i'm starting to work now and it's good pay and I'm doing very well. She just loves me for me. Not my resume.
Communication[rebelmouse-image 18347586 is_animated_gif=
My fiancé and I have lived together for a year now. We are very similar intellectually, but he's going into a scientific research field and is in grad school on his way to a PhD while I am doing my best to make it as a music teacher.
So we know finances are going to be very different in the future as it won't be practical for me to pursue a second degree for awhile. We knew this was going to happen, though, and we constantly communicate to check in about how we're feeling, if we are in need of more help, if I can do anything around the house to help with his long hours in the lab, etc.
As usual, communication is key. It's not perfect, and I'm self-conscious about my situation sometimes, but I have to consistently remind myself that a lot of the problems that I face with my career path are not my fault and I'm doing the best I can, and my fiancé is right there for me.
Amazing[rebelmouse-image 18347587 is_animated_gif=
Doesn't matter. My wife has art degree in photography and a PhD in microbiology but was making barely like $40k in acedamia. I have a HS diploma and dropped out of college. I've been doing backup and storage support for 15+ years and bring home $100k+. She's left academia and went into government contracting and is almost up to where I'm at now. While she was in academia she was doing the good work and I would happily have continued to support the household if she wanted to continue. She didn't and I'm happy that she's enjoying her new work and success. My willingness to contribute everything is the same as it always has been.
All of us have fears which some might call irrational.
Up to and including ghosts, witches, monsters.
But more often than not, reality can be far scarier than the supernatural.
And there are very few people indeed who don't have a memory of a moment when they were truly and genuinely scared.
And not by an otherworldly encounter, but by things that could quite literally happen to anyone.
Redditor GodhimselfUwU was curious to hear the scariest experiences people have lived through, leading them to ask:
"What’s the scariest non-supernatural thing that ever happened to you?"
"I was 14, alone at my grandmas house around midnight."
"She was across the street at the bar she owned."
"I was playing games on her computer, about 15 feet from one of the windows facing the backyard."
"All of a sudden the glass from that window shatters, and I ran to one of the bedrooms."
"I can hear my name being called."
"Eventually I see my grandma's ex-boyfriend enter the living room where the computer is."
"He keeps saying my name."
"I’m scared sh*tless, but I walk out and confront him."
"He says my grandma stole his ID and that’s what he came for, as he’s taking money from my grandmas purse."
"He looks f*cked up on something."
"I forget how he leaves but when he does I call the bar and people come over looking for him."
"They didn’t find him."
"About a year later he did it again, and I was once again alone there."
"Except this time instead of breaking a window he decides to try to kick the side door in."
"I’m just there chilling when out of nowhere I hear the loudest bangs coming from the side of the house and I instantly knew what was happening."
"I immediately called the bar and they sent a bunch of people over before he could make it in."
"He apparently tried to jump from one of her sheds into the alley next to her house and broke his leg."
"He went to prison."- nfreshn
They're coming right for us!
"Two bison charging right toward me down a narrow wooded path in Yellowstone when I was 12."- pcc2Open Range Running GIF by Reconnecting RootsGiphy
Uncomfortable in new surroundings.
"My sister has mental health issues."
"We were in a foreign country, driving across mountains on a one lane dirt road with no guardrails."
"She had a complete mental breakdown and threatened many times to drive off the edge."
"To this day, my mom swears my sister wouldn't have done it."
"All I say is, 'you weren't in the car'."
"'You have no idea'."- BlorengeJulius
Lost in the woods.
"Getting lost on 350 acres of woods in southeast Georgia."
"Was found about 6 hours later."
The dog found me hours before the people did.- No_Regrats_42Scared Woods GIF by Brat TVGiphy
A near death experience.
"Was working as a linemen tasked to replace a 16m wooden power pole which requires climbing up to untie the lines from the isolators."
"I checked if the pole had any rot beforehand, climbed up, untied the lines, climbed down, as I was packing my tools up , the pole fell from its own."- LimaRadek
He wasn't who he claimed to be.
"A man claiming to be a meter reader was in our yard and tried the back door AFTER trying the front."
"It was unlocked because there was a field behind us and our gate had a lock, that he somehow got by."
"The meter reader man was nearly eaten by our Great Dane who was dumb and peaceful, except for when she laid eyes on him."
"Our other dog also wanted to kill him and he was up on our trampoline begging us to call the dogs off, which we, my then 11 year old sister and I, refused to do and went to get our dad, who worked from home."
"The guy escaped while we got our dad and my dad let the police know what happened."
"The real meter reader man came the next week."- ApplesintheorchardDog Bouncing GIF by AFV PetsGiphy
Had no idea what they were witnessing.
"I guess watching a loved one have a seizure when I didn’t understand what it was."
"Legit thought I witnessed a death."
"Scary stuff."- Peppapigisgodly
Always look both ways.
"I got hit by a car while in a crosswalk a few months back."
"Had a split second where I saw him coming and realized what was about to happen."
"I thought I was going to die."- jolalolalulu
Big Sister to the Rescue.
"Saved my sisters life."
"We were boating and my parents just kinda assumed we’d be ok with them only out a couple hundred feet."
"I was about 17 and she was about 7."
"I’m laying there chilling and see her slip and fall into the water and just straight up sink."
"Ran over, dove in and pulled her to shore."
"She spit up a bunch of water and was fine but that experience rocked me to my core."
"Not a super crazy story but almost seeing a sibling die has always stuck with me."
"I’ve broken almost every bone in my body, I died one time and was in a coma for a little bit but for some reason this one stuck with me."- Present-Trip5231
Often, an experience that left us scared does make for a good story down the line.
Though whether it was a good enough story to make having gone through the experience worth it, is debatable.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
Having to work for a living is hard work.
Some jobs come with difficulty and two extra sides of stress.
So the last thing people need is unwarranted hate.
I'm so glad I work from home. Writing alone.
I have issues with me, but that I can deal with.
I do hate internet issues.
But that is warranted.
Redditor PM_ME_URFOOD wanted to talk about the jobs where a ridiculous amount of vitriol is all part of a days work. They asked:
"What profession gets an unjustified amount of hate?"
Waiting tables was always the bane of my existence. Customers are rude. Staff is rude. It never ends.
Filthy HoursFail Just For Laughs GIFGiphy
"Trash men. They’re looked down on as dirty and uneducated, but they do a hard job that is absolutely critical to our public health."
"Youth sports officials. I umpire baseball as a hobby and the way parents act is deplorable."
"The parents on the other hand deserve loads of hate sometimes. I was a coach for soccer and volleyball while I was in the Air Force. You would have loved to be a sports official for our leagues at our base. If a parent got sh**ty they are immediately ejected, no questions, and reported to whoever is their higher authority. It almost never happened."
Behind the Counter
"Any customer (client/patient) facing job. They get the abuse that stems from managements decisions, mistakes and incompetence."
"I did customer service for automotive companies at a call center for years. People get so unhinged, between dealerships, management, people calling into the wrong department, angry customers who were itching for a fight over a rental car. The job paid for five free therapy sessions a year, but honestly, it would take every ounce of restraint not to break some days."
"You aren't allowed to defend yourself or hang up, you can't transfer them to supervisors for a call, you technically work for a third party company that exists to keep the customer from ever actually speaking to the corporation. It was the worst job I've ever had, and that's coming from someone who used to work at a seafood processing plant."
"Food service. The workers have to eat too, you know."
"Working fast food sucked. Not because the job was hard. But because people were *icks. For like, no reason. Working in an actual kitchen also sucked. Not because the work was hard, but because you never did it quick enough and your boss was a *ick for like no reason. But at least you didn't deal with customers."
Too much stress...Jim Carrey Omg GIFGiphy
"Defense attorneys. People hate them because they defend violent criminals. However, as one lawyer put it, their job is not just to defend these people; their job is also to make sure that the cops did their job correctly."
I've always wondered about defense attorneys. How do they reconcile their morals?
They're Smart Toowill birth control GIFGiphy
"I live in Germany and currently in my (hopefully) last semester of university to become a pharmacist (4 years of university, one practical year and three exams of state required). A lot of people here think pharmacists are only cashiers and don’t know we get a scientific education. And God help me if I question a doctor's decision."
"I usually just lurk as a guest, but I made a Reddit account just for this. Cooks for public schools. They are constantly overworked, underpaid, and disrespected. Most schools have only a few ovens and microwaves, so school chefs have to either jam unsafe amounts of frozen food into ovens and microwaves, which is a giant fire hazard, or work non-stop from early morning."
"Plant breeders and plant geneticists. Imagine you're a plant nerd and you spend your life studying genetics so you can figure out how to improve food crops. Like, to make them yield more, taste better, be healthier, survive drought, etc. But on the internet, you're apparently trying to poison the world and control the food supply."
"Veterinarians. My doctors CONSTANTLY get yelled at or called heartless when, for instance, we refer them to a hospital more suited to care for the animal than us. Like bro we didn't just tell you know we are giving you options and trying to ensure you seek the proper care. Don't call me a heartless b**tard for that crap."
No Fun InvolvedAngry Neil Flynn GIFGiphy
"Janitors. Trash-related work. Sewage workers. Plumbing."'
I feel for everyone in these jobs. They deserve better.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Short of having a shopping addiction, no one actually likes spending money on stuff.
Why would you ever willingly give it away? It's your money!
Which might be why it feels so bad when you have to spend money of something that should be free from the beginning. People/ corporations are going to chase that cheddar, though, so there's little you can do besides complain, which frankly might be the best thing the internet is for.
"What should be free?"
Let's get these out of the way first...No, let's get this first one out of the way first.
Hidden fees are the worst.
Hidden. F***ing. Fees.
"Transaction/processing fees when you order a digital product online. Such as a concert ticket, where you pay 6 euro extra while you pay online, and have to print the ticket yourself."
"Or processing fees to pay bills that you need. Duke energy charges a $7 processing fee for you to pay your energy bill. Like wtf."
Pay To Pee
"Public bathrooms! The amount of human piles of poop around because the homeless have no where to relieve themselves!"
"Live in a very tourist-y part of the U.K., all public toilets charge and most cafes/pubs/libraries won’t let people use their toilets. As someone who lives here year round it’s really frustrating and doesn’t seem to make sense."
Want A Better Society? Educate Them.
"College. Or at the very least, college APPLICATIONS. If you're gonna require it for most careers, atleast make it accessible for people. And I just think it's stupid that people have to pay to get rejected."
"Oh god I hate that so much. Same with applying to apartments it’s such a waste of money if you don’t get approved. It racks up quickly too."
It does feel grimy when "official documentation" that is "mandatory" has to be bought and paid for not by the people requiring it, but by the people needing it.
Forcing Us To Pay For Something We're Forced To Have
"ID cards issued by the government. Especially since you need them for almost every aspect of daily living."
"I'm not the biggest fan of free stuf but having to pay for a piece of paper that says "I exist" is ridiculous."
It'll never not feel bad having to pay for something we expect to be free, but it feels ten times worse when it's something you need to get by in life. As in, need to live.
Let's All Agree To Take Care Of Each Other
"All base needs up to a level. I mean stuff we need to survive, eg. power, water,... and things we are required to use to be relevant in daily life internet,..."
"Seeing how now power companies are fuel companies are having THE biggest profit in years while more and more families are pushed into bigger and bigger deths just to get by."
"Same goes for internet tbh, poor kids are just not getting by in school becasue they lack the basic stuff every other kid has to get further in life. I am not saying they need the fastest possible internet with unlimited dl, but give them so they can work for school so the vicious cycle can be broken."
We Need It More Than Anyone
"All mental health services. If you don’t have benefits or a VERY good paying job, they are unaffordable for how often most people really need them. At $120-160/ session even once a week is not affordable for most people these days"
A Fine Line Between Need And Want
"Drinking water, sure. But water is an expendable resource and it should honestly be more restricted when we think about cases like people watering their lawns."
Paying To Live
"Insulin. People are dying because of greedy pharmaceutical companies."
"But We're 'Pro-Life'" - Jerks
"Birth control of all kinds."
"For anyone who b*tches about spending taxpayer money, I'd ask whether it costs more to provide condoms or to house prisoners."
"Giving birth (In the us)"
"As a female US citizen the more I learn about the whole giving birth sh*t the less I want kids. My friend just had a baby, there were some complications. She is now paying off a 14k hospital bill! The lowest I have hears is 8k. 8k just to have a f-cking kid! For a country that is gung-ho about forcing women to have kids they have missed the mark completely."
Everyone is looking for their payout, and unfortunately sometimes we're the ones who have to give it to them, whether it makes sense or not.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
The worst part of having breasts is Florida.
I didn't even say large breasts. Just breasts, any breasts. Florida and breasts are mortal enemies sworn to battle one another into oblivion until the end of days.
In other states, you and your ladies can live a more peaceful life. Here in Florida, it's A Song of Sweat And Fire Ants.
Ever get tiny little jellyfish stuck under your side-boob? Happens here all the time.
Bikinis should come with a "Sand Lice, Your Titty Crease, And You" informational pamphlet.
Wanna jog? Hope you accounted for the fact that the air is soup and will chafe and cauterize your nipples.
Know what limits your field of vision, making you more likely to accidentally step on a snake and/or gator? Boobs.
Know what slows you down as you try to escape the angry reptile from the above paragraph? Also boobs.
Reddit user Saibotnl1 asked:
"What's the most negative thing about having boobs?"
Now take all this stuff they said sucked, and then put it inside of a steam oven filled with mosquitos. That's Florida.
And Florida is incompatibile with breasts.
Cardio Is HardioGIF by VIASWEATGiphy
"I love them but running can be a nuisance even in a good sports bra."
"When I go to work, there is a woman that usually runs on the shoulder of the road. I gasp at how much her boobs bounce. Isn't that doing damage to tissue? Painful?"
"Yes! I literally always hold mine when going up/down stairs so they dont bounce. Running is uncomfortable even with a good bra :/ "
"If it's a sports bra that holds you, it's so tight that it's impossible to get into or out of without a whole team of people like a pit crew."
"If you can comfortably get into it, it won't hold the girls for long."
"Cardio is just not worth all this."
"As a kid I wasn't fit enough for jump rope, but now that I'm older and have the big boobies it feels even more impossible to ever indulge in."
Literally In The Way
"They get in the way!!"
"Lately I've been getting frustrated with exercise. My personal trainer will say to hold something a certain way and I'll try but it's so uncomfortable because my boobs are completely in the way."
"She has small boobs so she doesn't account for them being in that space right in front of your chest."
"My English teacher in 10th grade was drinking water one day when a few drops landed on his shirt. He then complained about getting older and how he never stuck out far enough to get his shirt wet."
"I just sighed."
"4th grade. 4th grade is when I stuck out too much to avoid drips."
"So very much this."
"I refuse to do mountain climbers when my trainer suggests it, she started to get mad saying it's a great exercise. My retort was that I'd really rather not knee myself in the breasts as part of my workout."
"The lady has small boobs and replied that she had never thought of that!"
"Probably growing them."
"It hurts, and if you get big boobs young and quickly, it’s both physical and social agony."
"It hurts to grow them, first of all, your chest aches and bumping them against anything really hurts - and since they’re a sudden, large addition to your body, you’re ALWAYS bumping them on stuff."
"But the social aspect is worse."
"Your female family members comment on them slyly and smirk at your response."
"Your male friends look at you weird and you have to realize they see you as more sexual than girls with smaller chests, even though you literally cannot control this."
"Other girls can be nasty and jealous."
"Eventually I learned to manage all this and I like having breasts now; but from like 11-16 I was so frustrated and upset that I had developed them at all."
Two Volcanosrachael ray boob sweat GIF by First We Feast: Hot OnesGiphy
"The sweat and itch!"
"Also that they're like two volcanos, which isn't especially practical during summers or when you're a constantly hot temperatured person anyway."
"No matter what I try, the skin under my boobs never cools down!"
"Boob sweat is the bane of my existence when it's even a little bit hot outside - and sometimes even when it's not lol..."
"I hate the feeling of sweat on my boobs. I just put tissue between and underneath my boobs to hopefully absorb the sweat so it won’t start to itch and drip."
"I STILL am not able to remove them after a long day. Why?!"
"Why can't I just set em aside for the night, all done. Why hasn't technology advanced to this possibility yet??"
"Absolutely they would. The relief we would get ... oh my god it sounds divine."
"Maybe I wouldn’t be so b*tchy."
"I’d honestly probably only wear them for ren faire, and leave them at home the rest of the year."
"The double standard of girls with small chests and big chests."
"If you have a big chest no matter what you wear or do it's sexual. But for girls with smaller chests they can get away with crop tops or v necks or even swim suits."
"Lol the bigger girls who spent their entire grade school years getting sent to the principal's office for breaking dress code will agree with you."
"Loose shirts will tent and billow up in the wind as you walk-- dress coded."
"Tight shirts that don't tent but cling to your chest-- dress coded."
"And don't even think about anything but a crew neckline, or you'll be dress coded again."
"I always got in trouble for wearing dresses in school, but skinny Minnie wearing something even worse gets by no problem just because she doesn't fill it out the way I do."
ExpensiveHappy Music Video GIF by DJ MustardGiphy
"Bras are expensive and you need regular bras, sports bras, probably something special like a strapless or low back if you have a special occasion or something."
"And don't even get me started on women's healthcare ..."
"Stage 4 breast cancer patient here, and it costs me about an extra $5000/yr to stay alive if everything goes well."
"I just stopped breastfeeding and none of my bras fit anymore."
"I’ve just been wearing sports bras every day because I don’t even know what cup size I am anymore and I don’t want to spend a fortune replacing all of my bras."
"Plus if you choose not to wear bras for any number of reasons, you’re treated as deviant or an acceptable target of inappropriate attentions."
"Laying on your stomach can be tricky."
"Laying on your back can be tricky as well."
"And on your side."
"Just laying in general with big boobs is a hassle."
"However women in my life have found it difficult to get a decent back massage because of this. I've seen plenty of massage tables with head holes, but none with boob support..."
"Semi-suffocating yourself on the beach while trying to get some sun on your back is fun."
"The fact that I look like a walking refrigerator if I wear a loose fitting top, as it billows shapelessly around my body in an odd fabric rectangle."
"But if I wear something form fitting, I look like a lady of the night and am treated as such."
"OMG this !!"
"I feel like all my girlfriends around me have such a fashion sense and can wear things with such grace but I always look as you’ve described. Like either I look like a couch pillow or Jessica Rabbit."
"Sometimes I just want to cut them off honestly."
"Yeah I’ve been wanting a reduction since a was a teen because of the back pain and catcalling, and many people I know with a bigger chest feel the same way."
"I had no idea women hated their boobs so much! It honestly is shining a light on an idea I have never thought of."
Attempted MurderBlack Woman Breast Cancer Awareness GIF by Know Your GirlsGiphy
"They might try to kill me."
"Breast cancer runs in my family and I have to have my first mammogram this year at 36."
"My mom was negative for both BRCA genes but there are 6 others they’ve discovered since she had cancer that we haven’t been tested for."
"Insurance won’t cover me to test unless she tests positive for one."
"Fun fun fun."
"My mom died from breast cancer at 46. I started getting mammograms at 34."
"Luckily, I took the BRCA test and was negative."
"Constantly being sexualized."
"I’m the least sexual person but people assume I’m super sexual because of my body. And I hate it"
"Yup, I'm ace and I honestly just want them chopped off to be rid of the constant sexualization of my body."
"It makes me really uncomfortable."
"My friend in elementary school had a condition where she went into puberty super early and had large breasts by 3rd grade."
"We would walk together to elementary school every morning and get cat called a lot, but we were too afraid to tell our parents because we thought they wouldn't let us walk together anymore."
"She would have teachers make comments about them."
"When we were older she talked about how insanely awful and alienating it made her feel growing up. Her younger sister had the same condition, but went on puberty blockers for it."
"These pendulous bags of hell have destroyed my back."
"Even a decade after a reduction surgery, I remain in daily pain. And now as an added bonus they get to be misshapen, scarred horribly, and completely useless for raising a baby."
"I didn’t realize how heavy they are until I got together with girl with big boobs and woooooow they are heavy!"
"I got C cups in fifth grade and those f*ckers went all the way to G by senior year."
"My posture was/is awful and I've felt like an old woman since I was a teenager. I don't even want babies, so they're never actually gonna be useful either."
See what I mean?
They're kind of awful once they hit a certain size, and that size is pretty much ANY size if you're in Florida.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.