People Share Their Most Memorable 'If It Costs You Your Peace, Then It's Too Expensive' Moment
We humans are not the best at applying reason-driven cost-benefit analysis in real time. Instead, an event suddenly takes place and we're pulled deeper and deeper into an emotional response.
The consequences of that tendency can be large, and various.
Rather than assess, say, the entire context of an argument with some stranger at the DMV, sizing up whether the exchange is worth it at all, we burrow in with a voice that gets louder and fists tha clench tighter.
That can feel satisfying, even necessary in the moment. But when the dust settles and logical thinking returns--far too late to be of use--we realize what a wasted of stress and energy it was.
A recent Reddit thread asked people to share their most memorable examples of these ill-advised moments. Hopefully, reading this will help you avoid sliding into one in the future.
lizzetter asked, "'If it costs you your peace, it's too expensive.' When has that advice held true for you?"
"Ever fight over a parking spot and win, and then realize as you're walking away from the car that it will be left unattended for who knows how long?" -- DougFordSucksFightMe
"I've never understood people getting so worked up over a parking spot unless it's in the city or something like that where parking spots are rare and you may have to walk an hour to get where you need to go" -- ParkityParkPark
The Bottomless Supply of Trolls
"Winning arguments on Reddit. Nine times out of ten I just let it go, because otherwise I will literally spend all day on a pointless argument with someone who doesn't even have a face." -- Alex_Duos
"For me, it's all about the stubbornness to entertainment ratio. If I'm going to be arguing online with some other a**hole, I damn sure better be enjoying myself, or else it's just not worth it." -- Smegma_On_Demand
Sometimes Ya Just Want Something Nice
"I had a 20 year old Saturn that I intended to drive until the wheels fell off. Well even though COVID has meant I basically never leave the house, I bought a new car in 2020."
"I've put about 1500 miles on it so far, and that's it. But the thing is, even though I rarely drive it, when I DO drive it I'm no longer asking myself the question "Is today the day the wheels fall off?" every time I leave town."
"Some may argue buying a new car I've hardly driven is a stupid move. I say I'd rather be stupid and happy than smart and miserable."
Not Worth Zombification
"Work-life balance in my job. Nothing is ever on fire, nothing has to be dealt with at 11 at night or on the weekends regardless of who's sending a Slack at those times."
"I protect my evenings and weekends with a ferocity."
"My husband's family has money. When we were first starting out, we were encouraged to ask his grandparents for help, but we didn't want to. When we bought our first home, they were 'offended' that we got a mortgage from a bank instead of using 'family money.'"
"Twenty years later, we are happy in our own little bubble. We have no stake in any family drama, and we only visit when we feel like it. We don't owe anybody a damn thing, and even though it sometimes sucks to be the poor relations, the peace of mind is priceless."
LET. IT. GO.
"I used to carry around a lot of hate."
"I had a few people that I relished the idea of provoking into a fight so I could do serious harm."
"It took a while, but eventually I learned what it was doing to me, and realized that they probably didn't give me a second thought. They were getting free real estate in my head."
Two Solutions: Generosity, or Buying More Fries
"When my girlfriend swore up and down the drive thru that she wasn't hungry and didn't want anything, then snacks on my animal fries the whole way home."
"Being hangry enough to brake check the whole thing on to the floor wasn't worth the fallout. One of my ugliest moments as an adult and should have just taken the fry tax."
Like the Trolls, They'll Keep Coming
"Bad customers. I've learned over the years to turn away difficult clients/jobs. Some people won't be happy, regardless what you give them. I don't need that anxiety no more." -- 12vElectronics
"I'll have to learn to do this better. I cut a some clients a few years ago and things dramatically improved. They were talking up too much time for the reward. Others have now crept into the system though. I'll have to start a cull again. The 80/20 rule springs to mind." -- StingerMcGee
Enough Is Enough
"My relationship with my brother. I grew up with the 'blood is thicker than water' mentality, but he treated me in ways that made me feel worthless. I haven't spoken to him in about five years."
"He can think whatever he wants about me, but I don't need to hear it."
It's a Third of Your Life
"This past year I resigned from a job (one in my field) that was literally causing me to have full-blown panic attacks from stress for a job that pays less. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my chest. No job is worth being unhappy."
"Playing a high level sport. Played baseball since I was a kid, very good at it, started to get scouted by universities and even some Pro teams."
"Eventually I got a scholarship for it to go to a school in the states (from Canada) as I got older though I realized I didn't love it, just enjoyed being good at it and seeing my parents happy."
"When I got to university it was a total struggle, I'm not one to need motivation to practice or workout but I hated my team, hated my coaching staff, didn't like the school either but kept going because I didn't want to disappoint anyone."
"Fast forward to Covid with no baseball and all this free time on my hands to pursue other passions and fun things I couldn't while always playing baseball. Now because of the pandemic I've realized there's so much more than just trying to make others happy."
Carrying More Than Your Share
"Taking care of other people/ friends mental health constantly. I didn't mind venting but I definitely let people vent to me too much and the worry kept me up at night."
"Thankfully my friends don't do it as much anymore and it's much calmer"
The Weight of Ethics
"Working jobs where the company's activities were detrimental to society, the environment, or both."
"Yeah, evil jobs may pay better, but I sleep better knowing what I do improves the world in some tiny way."
"Deciding what to keep and what to get rid of. I've been downsizing quite a bit over the last few months in favour of minimalist living and I honestly feel so much better after getting rid of so much stuff."
"I've already gotten rid of close to 50% of my things and it is like a huge weight has been lifted. Why the hell did I have so much useless crap?"
Cost-Benefit Analysis, Explained
"I wanted to wear a top hat at my wedding. I like hats, and when else am I gonna wear a top hat?"
"But my wife was adamantly against it. She is about a head shorter than me, and all of my family is taller than her, and a top hat would make it even more apparent."
"So I didn't wear a top hat. Any benefit I'd get from it would have been outweighed by annoying her, and I decided it wasn't worth it."
"But there were compromises. It was my idea to get a bouncy castle in, which was a very popular addition on the day!"
"Past failed relationships. When the ex tried to reconnect after three years and a break up text that said 'We're done.' I spent so long wondering what I did wrong and it took a while to realize it wasn't my fault at all but theirs for trying to control things."
"They sent an email but the only thing I saw was the title and it just sits unread in my inbox. I don't need to reopen that past when my present and future are going great."
So What's It For?
"Home insurance and home warranty."
"I pay for a service. When I call to make a claim and use the service it is denied, 100% of the time. So then I have to spend a week arguing about why it shouldn't be denied, or why I should get my money back. Not worth it."
Be it a sports team, movie star, or book series, just about everything has its fan base.
Though some fanbases are much more "fanatical" than others.
In some cases, one fanbase leads to another, such as Twilight internet fan fiction leading to the Fifty Shades Of Grey trilogy.
Sadly, there are also fan bases that don't simply celebrate the person, series, or team they idolize, but sometimes make an effort to take down their rivals and competition.
Clogging up social media, message boards and online comments sections with their unpleasant rhetoric.
"What are the most toxic fandoms on the internet?"
Always Remember, They Work For Us!
"Fans of politicians."
"Too many people have forgotten that politicians are public servants and not celebrities."
"We elect them to serve, not to be worshipped."- Kedosto
Fine To Be Fascinated, Admiring Them However...
"All those crazy fans who support serial killers just because they think they're hot."
"Ted Bundy fanatics etc."- Oiaosq
"Jefferey Dahmer fans."- saturnwrites17
You Can't Pick And Choose...
'There's a very prevalent group of metal fans that claim that nobody listens to metal anymore but then proceed to hate every metal band that isn't from the 80s or earlier."- NeutralityTsar
'The 'real metal' elitists."- Dozinggreen66music video 80s GIFGiphy
... Are There Any Fans Left?...
"Idk how they are anymore, but 10 years ago the 'Glee' fandom was the worst."- meganmicheles
Always Best To Leave It To The Professionals
"I wouldn't class my contribution as a fandom but it's definitely a toxic internet-inspired community."
'Armchair detectives and true crime obsessives."
"I don't mean people who like to listen to TC podcasts or documentaries."
"I mean the people who actively try and solve a missing person/murder case and just end up getting things wrong, making very serious and often false allegations, disrupting an investigation or hurting family members."
"Helping catch Gabby Petito's killer was an exception."
"Just look at the Nicola Bulley case in the UK right now, sad case YouTubers traipsing thru people's gardens at night, accusing house owners of criminality for daring to leave a light on late at night."
"Overall, just a horrible community who do more harm than good."
"Reddit enables a lot of this type of thing too, I must add."- KrippendorfsAlfalfa
Good Sportsmanship Doesn't Just Apply To The Players
"Sport Fans who gets into fist fights over a damn game they aren’t even playing themselves." -Reddit3 Lions Wow GIFGiphy
Everyone Is Entitled To Privacy
"'The Heartstopper' fandom forced Kit Connor to come out of the closet, at the age of 18."
"That's pretty toxic."- FireFlinger
Sometimes Fandom Comes With Cognitive Dissonance
"'Rick and Morty Fandom', especially if individuals belonging to the fandom, decided to defend Justin Roiland."
"Don't get me wrong, I like 'Rick and Morty', but I can also take a step back and analyze the creators, the content, and the fan culture."
"Everybody I've met who is a die-hard 'Rick and Morty' fan usually thinks they're just like Rick."
"If you watch the show, you should know that he's not an ideal role model."
"Not a huge fan of that behavior."- Bubbly-Substance-112
Calm Down Now...
"There is a very specific set of 'The Legend of Korra' fans that are incredibly toxic and horrible."- ApathicSaintwhy dont you just come and find out avatar the last airbender GIFGiphy
Always Important To Get Back To Reality
"Genshin impact Twitter."- BenWinnin
Taste Is Subjective, Especially In Music
"I’ve been called racist for saying I don’t like it."- Top_Buy2467
Be it for their local sports team or their favorite book, fans have every right to show their enthusiasm.
But when they begin to demean others, and their fandom ceases to be a celebration, they might want to think more carefully about their actions.
People Explain How They Met Their Significant Other
The start of love is always such a fascinating topic.
How do you all find each other?
The meet-up is such a thing for so many.
But apparently, it can be magic.
Redditors wanted to share how they find their partners in the most unlikely ways.
Redditor William3356 asked:
"How did you and your SO meet?"
I love the beginning of a love story.
Make me believe it's possible.
Looking Goodpennywise it 2017 GIFGiphy
"I was drunk, walking in the road on the way to a pub, dressed as a clown. He was sober and on his way home from work. (It was Halloween)."
"My favorite part of this is the clarification that it was Halloween as if it’s there are other times you may be dressed as a clown. but this is so cute!"
And there she was...
"Totally random. I was jetskiing at a lake with a buddy. There was a big group next to us that was having an office party. They invited us over to share some shade and food. My wife showed up a bit later. She was nice and I invited her and her friend to go mountain biking with a big group of my friends the following weekend."
"I was not looking for a girlfriend at the time, but that is how things work. We started dating a few weeks later and our 21st anniversary is next month. I was 35 and she was 36 when we got married and neither of us had been married before."
"Worked at the same prison together. I hated him. He hated me. We worked separate shifts then we got put on the same shift together. One day I showed up with a super short new haircut and he asked me 'Wtf did you do to your hair?' And I said 'Me? Wtf did you do to YOUR hair?'"
"And suddenly he found me attractive and the more I was mean to him, the more he liked me. Eventually, some hardships happened and he was the first to immediately extend a hand and help me and I saw the soft sweet side of him and I came around."
8 years later...
"Online cos I don't have any friends and he had no luck with women in bars/clubs. Put him off for 3 weeks, asked my mom to check him out to see if she approved of him, she did, told my dad gently (just got out a baaaad relationship) and we met in a park and sat and chatted under cherry Blossom trees for 2 hours. 8 years later still kicking and can't imagine life without him now."
Cherishmadonna cherish GIFGiphy
"Just moved to a new part of town, had no friends but saw a group of people at the skatepark. I decided to sit near them with hopes that they might talk to me (I always had a hard time meeting people/making friends)."
"I was 15 at the time and my now wife saw me alone and invited me to hangout with her group. I made great friends and gained years of incredible memories that I cherish to this day. I'm 23 now, we just celebrated our 4th anniversary, and just got married a week ago and couldn't be happier."
The Tag AlongGiphy
"My cousin's wedding. She was a friend of another cousin who tagged along. We had 15 good years together before she passed away unexpectedly from a heart defect."
"I met my boyfriend at a my cousin's wedding as well. I am sorry for your loss. May you find comfort in the memories."
Weddings are always a love match breeding ground.
Bountiful...Reel It In Jay Buhner GIF by Northwest MotorsportGiphy
"Technically a blind date! We met on Plenty of Fish but neither of us had a profile picture for one reason or another. We decided to meet up less than 24 hours after first chatting but without sending each other a photo first. We fell in love as soon as we saw the other that first time and we've never left each others side since!"
When in Honky Tonk
"20 + years ago in a Honky Tonk back in Texas her cousin was talking to my best friend I asked her to dance she told me no. This is how our conversation started and we talked all night long I asked her to dance again she said yes and the Lights came on. I never got to dance with her that night but I did get her number. I knew the minute I met her I was going to marry her. I had never felt like that before. We are still married and she is my best friend."
"Met through mutual friends on a camping trip, her smile was the greatest thing I had ever seen. New life goal: make this girl laugh and smile as much as possible. Now I have a picture at my desk of her doing both, while smashing a piece of our wedding cake into my face."
In MotionSeason 2 Dancing GIF by The Fresh Prince of Bel-AirGiphy
"She saw me dancing and decided to get a piece of that action. 30 years later we still go dancing."
Dancing is always the way to a heart.
Do you have any amazing "meet cute" moments with your significant other? Let us know in the comments below.
In the jungle, the lion sleeps tonight.
And apparently, he ain't all that bad.
Well, if you listen to that song and ignore Scar in 'The Lion King,' then I guess they're well-meaning beasts.
But a lot of nature does get a bad reputation.
Most animals only attack in fear.
And Lord knows we humans give them reasons to fear.
Redditor Puzzleheaded_1377 wanted to discuss the creatures we need to be more accepting about, so they asked:
"What's an animal that is not as dangerous as people think?"
Dog breeds are important to discuss with this issue.
Save the pit bulls.
"Cheetahs. Don't run. They are skittish. They don't expect the prey not to run. No documented case of a cheetah attacking a human in the wild ever. Just stand your ground and look big. The only big cat that will work with."
"I’m from Zimbabwe and 98% of the time the people that are killed by wild animals are almost always the tourists or people from rich countries, locals are mostly killed by hippos while crossing rivers random animal attacks are rare but the tourists almost always walk into the danger to take pictures."
"Or they think the animal is cute and doesn’t look dangerous, opening car windows to feed animals etc."
"I think they should publicize the statistics of how many are getting killed but they won’t do it to boost tourism; If I had a choice whether to run through a herd of buffalo vs a pride of lions, I would choose to run through the lions."
Just Scary to Look At...
"Y’all ever seen a potter wasp? It’s a hornish bugger with a needle-thin abdomen, flies around looking like it packs a nastier sting than five yellowjackets combined. Turns out, more docile and less painful than a yellowjacket. It just has a frightening appearance."
"Check out the ichneumon wasp. Looks like the cursed child not of the forbidden love affair between a wasp and a scorpion. Actually doesn't sting. Their super long 'stinger' is actually an ovipositor that it uses to lay eggs underneath tree bark. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Megarhyssa_macrurus"
They are herbivores...
"Gorillas. Many people seem to think that they are aggressive animals who if you were to find yourself standing in front of, you are about to get torn apart or bludgeoned to death. They are herbivores. They have been studied extensively to be inherently peaceful animals that avoid violence unless of course all other options are exhausted."
"People literally go on walking tours up in to mountains in the heart of gorilla territories and sit around families of them with the silverback present. There is an art to approaching the silver back initially which the local guides are well aware of, in order to clarify that there is no threat to his family."
"Once that has been established, people can sometimes get lucky enough to even play with the gorilla babies, all in the presence of the parents. How many large mammals can you think of with that level of tolerance?"
"It's chimpanzees that absolutely terrify me. Arguably the absolute last animal alongside hyenas and African painted dogs that I would want to be stuck anywhere with."
One bad egg...Giphy
"Stingrays. They usually swim away from you. That thing that killed Steve Irwin was huge and was probably having a bad day and attacked."
If it killed Steve, it's a no for me.
"Tarantulas. They are depicted as deadly in so many movies, but like bees and wasp, their bite while painful isn’t generally harmful to humans unless you’re allergic."
"Bats, harmless critters. Only maybe possibly starting Coronavirus but we ignore that. They maintain eco systems and play important roles in our diets. They are soooooooooooooo unappreciated."
"Bats do carry rabies though. Knew a guy who woke up in his summer cottage with a bat hanging directly above his face, had to get the full 9 yard rabies treatment. Very unpleasant."
"That being said I love bats, and as you mentioned they play a huge role in the ecosystem. Just keep them away from your face. :) "
"Fishers. If you live in the right part of the country, you'll hear people blame all kinds of things on fishers, massacred chickens and missing cats and so on. Even if they've never seen a fisher in their lives. If not fishers, then owls."
"It's probably usually raccoons. Raccoons are active at night, and male raccoons will absolutely go after a housecat -- and they can chase it up a tree, etc. Male raccoons are much bigger than most people think (they get up to 60 lb in the wild) and much more aggressive."
"Fishers are mustelids (weasels, basically) and cat-sized, and they do occasionally kill prey larger than themselves, even including bobcats. But not often, mostly because they don't need to. And they're not super-common in the contiguous U.S. And there are owls big enough to take housecats, but, again not that common. Whereas raccoons... yeah. Everywhere."
"Leave them alone and they'll leave you alone. Hell, the chances of actually seeing a wolf in the wild randomly are slim to none."
"You are not prey shaped, so they won't treat you like prey. You're more of a curiosity or, at worst, an annoyance that is to be avoided."
Keep ThemChewing Chew GIFGiphy
"Opossums. They’re super-timid, and very RARELY carry rabies. You want them in your yard."
I don't care what you say... Opossums are a NO!
Do you have anything we should add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
People Explain Which Activities They Did Wrong For Years Until Someone Showed Them What To Do
As humans, it's impossible for us to know everything, including the most efficient ways to do things.
But while we may know that, it's still frustrating when we discover there may have been an easier way to do something all along.
Even on TikTok, one of the top trends features users who discover a simpler, more efficient way to do something in their thirties or forties, before they robustly claim that they "learn more on TikTok than they ever did in school."
Fortunately for those who may not use the app, Redditors were ready to share their favorite finds in the thread.
Eager to learn more, Redditor slart_n asked:
"What everyday activity did you do wrong for years, before someone finally showed you an important trick?"
"Not every day for everyone, but it WAS every cashier at my job... we had cigarette cases at the self-checkout that we could unlock and get packs out of for customers, so we didn't have to walk all the way to the big register to get them every time."
"Restocking them was a pain in the *ss, one pack at a time, pushing the little spring loader thing back with each one, squeezing them in next to each other..."
"We did it this way for years. It was how I had been shown how to restock them. YEARS. At least seven!! SEVEN. YEARS."
"And then one day I was pulling the price tags off to change them out, and one was a little stubborn. I gave it a little yank upwards and suddenly THE ENTIRE SHELF SLID RIGHT OUT ON ROLLERS."
"The way my jaw dropped. I think I actually swore out loud. It was SO MUCH EASIER to restock them. I ended up showing every single one of the other self-checkout cashiers, and every single one was blown away. Even the ones who had been there way longer than me."
"None of us knew the shelves pulled out. Not even the manager! She actually said, 'Are you f**king kidding me?!' when I showed her."
"I can't believe we all went that freaking long without knowing the shelves pulled out. Years of stocking those things one pack at a time. Then again, if we had known and been using it, they probably would have been broken like everything else in that place."
"I never thought I needed a workout routine as long as I worked different parts of my body on days until I watched an Arnold Schwarzenegger video on how he makes sure every single muscle gets hit in a three-day period. Since then I noticed more gains than I had made all year."
Chopsticks and Pens
"Someone told me I used chopsticks wrong. I put the second one on the side of my ring finger, with my index and middle fingers on top of it. The person told me to just hold it like I would hold a pen, and I was like, what the f**k, this is how I hold a pen."
"Then I realized I hold a pen differently from most people."
"I've since retrained myself to hold chopsticks correctly, but I'm not even going to try to change how I write because it's just ingrained so deeply (and also, it doesn't really matter anyway)."
"Put on pillow covers. I used to shove the pillow in there and struggle with it until my wife showed me how to flip the pillowcase inside out and cover the pillow while flipping right side out."
Hanging a Picture the First Time
"If you’re mounting something to the wall that has pre-designed holes on the back, rather than measure between the holes and try to space the nails/screws accordingly, stretch a single piece of painter's tape (blue tape) across the back of the piece from just before the beginning of the first hole to just after the last one."
"Mark each hole with a pencil/pen on the painter's tape, then place the tape on the wall and voila, you have a perfect mounting template. I suggest you do a quick check with a laser level on the wall just to make sure your marks are level before drilling."
"I work as a freelance handyman, and when my Dad showed me this trick it blew my mind. Seriously, ask a usually quiet and reserved Dad if he has any DIY hot tips and you’re bound to get some solid gold advice.
How Was That, Now?
"Opening a beverage can."
"I keep my fingernails very short and sometimes it would be a bit finicky to open the tab on a can."
"I was d**n near 40 years old when my buddy showed me you’re supposed to push down on the hinge portion of the tab (the little dot toward the middle) with your thumb to raise the other edge of the tab so you can get your finger under it. I felt like an id**t."
Text Editing Made Easy
"When texting, sliding your thumb on the spacebar of your phone will move the cursor."
"Boots first, then corset."
Tomato Paste Push-Pops
"Those tiny, obnoxious cans of tomato paste. You can take both ends off with the can opener, and use a wooden spoon to push on the top. It comes out clean like a push-pop!"
Gift Card Identity
"Whenever a 'free' service asks for a credit card, I input the information from the back of a gift card. Trust no one on the internet."
The Last of the Soap
"When the soap bar gets to the last sliver, you can just stick it onto the new bar to use it up completely."
"Taking the safety cap off of deodorant."
"I used to try to get my fingernails under it and pop it off. They were quite a pain in the a** to get off."
"In my late 20s, my roommate was talking to me while unpacking her groceries and she opened her deodorant and just twisted up the stick so that the cap came off. I was shocked."
"Leek will continue to grow when put in water. When you have used all the green parts, and only the boring white stuff is left, put its roots in water for a few days and the green parts will grow back."
"Not an everyday activity, but someone showed me I'd been wasting celery for years. When it goes limp and loses its crunch, you can just soak it in water overnight, and it makes it crisp again."
"When celery goes limp, it's only because the water content has been reduced over time. Same with some other crunchy vegetables. I use the same trick with daikon radishes to make them fresh again."
"You can take the silverware basket out of the dishwasher when unloading it."
"You can also set it on the counter next to the sink when you’re loading to keep from having to bend over to put things in the basket over and over."
While all of these lessons are pretty simple in and of themselves, they could make a big difference in someone's life if they've been taking a much more complicated route all this time, especially if they're in their thirties or later.