Redditor icyqueen999999 got some helpful hints after asking:
"What is a dead giveaway of a toxic relationship?"
Trust was severely lacking in these relationships.
Proof Of Fidelity
"My 57 year old colleague constantly has to send videos and pics of him working to his wife."
– LB89LB19
Speaking From Experience
"My ex always tried to make me do this. F'king obnoxious. Guess who was eventually found out to never be where he said he was and was sneaking around instead? Lol."
– AlpacaOurBags
Final Analysis
"It's not only that but if you make someone spend all their energy proving that they are faithful, they don't have the mental capacity to even consider their partner might be the unfaithful one."
– sturmeh
Submitting Detailed Records
"I found out the other week that my buddy has to send his girlfriend detailed notes with timestamps of legitimately everything he does while hanging out with the guys..."
"9:14 went down to the kitchen for a glass or water 9:15 stopped to pet the cats before heading upstairs 9:18 made it back upstairs and sat on the right side of the couch."
– rowdy_sprout
Both parties involved have to benefit from a relationship. These examples reflect ones that don't.
Path Of Least Resistance
"One partner always gets their way."
"For me, it was 'easier' to bend over backward than to deal with the whining and complaining if I stood my ground. Easier is in quotes because it was only easier in the short term - long term made life hell."
– The_Griffin_Scimitar
Mental And Physical Toll
"Fine, whatever you want, just like always, whatever you want."
"Whatever I want? It's never whatever I want. When I wanted to see Stomp, and you wanted to see Wicked, what did we see?"
"We saw Wicked."
"When I said that I wanted to have kids, and you said, you wanted me to have a vasectomy, what did I do? And then when you said that you might want to have kids and I wasn't so sure, Who had the vasectomy reversed? And then when you said you defintely didn't want to have kids, who had it reversed back? Snip snap! Snip snap! Snip snap! I did. You have no idea the physical toll, that three vasectomies have on a person. And I bought this condo to fill with children."
– VaiterZen
Failure In The Long Term
"Sadly, in these sorts of relationships, the person who cares the least has the most power. You could bend over backwards trying to please the other person, and it might keep them around in the short term, but it doesn't change the fact they don't really respect you. You know in your gut that if you ever actually stood your ground on any issue instead of giving in to them, things would end there and then."
– Innalibra
It appears the love has vacated the scene a long time ago.
Talking Smack
"If someone is always talking crap about their partner whenever they are not together."
"I've seen this far too many times, it's always ended in total disaster withing a few years at most."
– ricochetpeestream
Endless Complaining
"Ugh, yup. I've listened to so many people complain about their partners and I just wonder: WHY are y'all together!? If I get a chance to talk about my bf, you can bet I'll start dishing out everything I love about him."
– MelanisticCrow
Hostility
"Lack of trust and constant fights."
– Lost-Championship914
"I once read that contempt is the #1 sign of a relationship on its deathbed. When partners don’t respect each other, it sets the stage for every other bad thing."
– PartySquirrel1
Breaking up is hard to do, as the song goes.
But when a relationship has been on the rocks and has turned unbearable to the point of resenting one another, there's no point in staying with the toxic situation.
Acknowledging the red flags and willingly staying in a miserable situation is not healthy.
There is always something, or someone, better out there.
"What is the most successful lie in history?"
They Couldn't Detect It For Years
"Have you ever heard of a radar detector?"
"How about a radar detector detector, which the police use to see if you have a detector?"
"Ever wonder how they work?"
"I mean, a radar detector is a receiver, how could the police possibly know you have one?"
"Until recently, practically every radio used a concept called superheterodyne."
"Basically there’s a tiny radio transmitter in your receiver, that signal is mixed with the one from the antenna and the result is what your receiver tunes to."
"It's one of the most important inventions of the 20th century, and you most likely never heard of it."
"The problem is that sometimes the tiny transmitter is poorly shielded and some of it leaks back out the antenna."
"If you know what that 'intermediate frequency' is you can listen for it."
"The Escort radar detectors, which were super-popular in the 80's, leaked like a sieve.""Presto, radar detector detectors."
"Takeaway: if you know what you're looking for, you can actually detect someone else's radio receiver."
"The setup."
"In 1942 RAF planes began using VHF radar to look for German submarines leaving port in France at night."
"All of a sudden they were getting sunk en mass."
"The Germans were familiar with other British radars working around this frequency and were able to find the new radar's frequency around August."
"They built a receiver, Metox, which was tuned to this frequency."
"When a plane using this radar was anywhere in the area, Metox would play a sound into the radio operator's headphones."
"By October most of the fleet had it and the RAF pilots were returning with stories about how the uboats would always dive as soon as they turned toward them to attack."
"But the RAF had prepared for this moment, they knew it was only a matter of time before the Germans found the frequency."
"Earlier two grad students had come up with a new device called the magnetron that produced very strong radio signals from a device the size of a breadbox."
"And the signal was REALLY short, about 10 cm, whereas their older radars were 150."
"So Metox was completely incapable of 'hearing' it, it was tuned way too far from the frequency of the new signal."
"They rushed the new system into production and the first sets started arriving just in time for the uboat campaign to start up again in spring when the weather got better."
"By March it was clear to the Germans something was up."
"Their boats were getting sunk en mass again, and the ones that escaped attack said there was no warning on their detectors."
"They tried everything to detect the new signal, but they just couldn’t find it."
"This was because they were missing one extremely important bit of electronics, the crystal detector, and simply couldn’t hear the signals no matter how hard they tried."
"And now the lie."
"Knowing something was up, uboats were on high alert all the time."
"One got lucky and shot down its attacker, and captured the crew."
"During interrogation they asked why they could no longer detect the radar."
"The pilot told them they no longer used radar. Instead, he claimed, they had a receiver for Metox and under perfect conditions they could pick it up 90 miles away."
"They only turned on the radar at the last minute for range measurements so they knew when to drop the depth charges."
"By that time the U-boat was too busy exploding to notice."
"The Germans didn’t believe him, but it was technically possible, once can indeed make a receiver to detect your receiver."
"And Metox was known to be 'leaky', as it was deliberately built quick and cheap from a pre-war French radio set."
"So they built their own Metox receiver in the lab, and sure enough, they could detect it."
"So then they put it on a plane and detected one of their boats 60 miles away."
"Utter panic."
"Orders were sent out to all boats: turn off Metox."
"And so not only did the RAF get to keep using their fancy new magnetron radar without the Germans even trying to detect it, but then they turned off their perfectly good Metox detectors and all the RAF planes with the older radar suddenly started working again too!"
"And THAT is the greatest lie ever."
"By the end of June, the uboat fleet was on the bottom of the ocean."
"This was not due entirely to this trick, there were a number of things that all arrived at almost the same time that did it."
"It was the combination of the new radars, huff-duff, larger numbers of frigates dedicated to the taskand the lack of any detectors on the uboats that made even the old radars work again all arrived within two months."
"And that was that."
"The Germans finally figured it out some time around November. November!"
"Apparently the pilot made the whole thing up on his own."
"This little white lie helped open the Atlantic to the convoys of 1943 that led to the end of Italy’s involvement and ultimately dday."- maurymarkowitz
Point Pointing GIF by Sarah & DuckGiphyElizabeth Taylor Had Us All Fooled
"That diamonds are valuable."
"Made one family really really rich though lol."
"Gotta love how many people try to defend their artificially inflated value."
"Just shows how well the lie continues to work lol."- sfPanzer
All Talk, NO Truth
"Frank Abagnale Jr., the inspiration for 'Catch me If You Can', apparently wasn’t as big of a con man that the movie leads you to believe."
'He conned people into thinking he was a bigger con man than he actually was."- rickejohn
Surveillance, Or Just Profiling?
"'We are using mass surveillance to help catch terrorists'."- Salty_Cantaloupe4926
GiphyAll It Takes Is One Click
"'I acknowledge that I have read and agree to the above Terms and Conditions'."- SuvenPan
Maybe Not A Lie, But Pretty Misleading
"Iceland and Greenland."- Technical_Put_9173
...Might Have To Think About This One...
"I before E except after C."
"Unless your foreign neighbor Keith offers you eight counterfeit sleighs from feisty caffeinated weightlifters."
"Weird."- BigJDizzleMaNizzles
Nicksplat Nickelodeon GIF by Hey ArnoldGiphyIt's Easy To Believe Most Rumors...
"In the 90s kids spread the rumor that Marilyn Manson had a rib removed so he could suck his own d*ck."
"We spread this rumor across the entire country without the use of cell phones or the internet."- Solid_Science4514
They Really Weren't The Least Bit Suspicious?
"Trojan horse comes to mind."- riphitter
All ISN'T Fair In Politics...
"That lobbying isn't just bribery with extra steps."- fentown
Corruption Lobbying GIF by Transparency InternationalGiphyThere's No Way Of Knowing
"One that we'll never know was a lie."- Rare_Cause_1735
Oldest One In The Book...
"It's not you, its me"- read110
It's All In The Balance...
"That fat is harmful to your diet."
"That was just false information."
"And by trying to replace fats with sugar, obesity became an epidemic."- Mangobonbon
Some lies are easily spotted from miles away.
Others are so convincing, the world will never know they were duped.
"What are some hygiene tips you wish more people knew?"
Keep Those Supplies Clean
"Clean your hairbrushes, especially if you have oily hair/scalp."
"'Clean your glasses' includes the frames and nose pads."- PM_ME_BREAD_PICS_
Wash Your Waterbottle!
"PLEASE wash your reusable water bottle!"
"i know i know refilling your water bottle is super eco friendly but you gotta make sure you're washing it regularly to avoid any gross bacteria buildup."- linlindindin
As Do Your Sheets
"Pillows cases need to be washed often."
Design Pillows GIF by R Marine CrawleyGiphyOne Door To Always Leave Open...
"Maybe this is hygiene-adjacent but to stop that old laundry smell you have to leave your washing machine open to dry out."
"Every time!"- plantsplantsplaaants
It Can't Disguise Filth
"Perfume is not a substitute for washing and deoderant."- ReplicatedSun
Wiping Doesn't Always Suffice
"Washing your a**."- Professor_Lowbrow
"Washing your a** in the shower."
"Crack and hole my friends."
"Crack. And. Hole."- Watch-The-Time
season 1 friends GIFGiphyThink Of Every Place You Used It...
"Cleaning/ disinfecting your phone."
"It has so much bacteria and I hate when someone shows me to look at their phone and that shits crusty."- Permission_Beginning
Learn Something New Every Day
"I wish I had known that the natural Ph of vaginal secretions was acidic enough to stain clothing and such."
"It would’ve saved me a lot of anxiety of wondering what was wrong with me."
"Yes, it IS NORMAL for this to happen."- Ok-Consideration2676
Remember Every Crevice
"Wash behind your ears and inside deep of your belly button."- WarSlow5450
Adam Sandler Bath GIFGiphyNot Just For The Armpits
"Deodorant works on under boob and cleavage."- PresentationNice7043
Not The Aroma People Are Looking For
"If you can smell you, we all could smell you two days ago."- Lord_Cabbage_64
WHY DO PEOPLE NEED REMINDING?!?!?!
"Nobody realizes the amt of pee, blood and feces are on the stall latch."
"Wash your hands."- coreysgal
Wash Hands Nicksplat GIF by Hey ArnoldGiphyIt Doesn't KEEP Things clean...
"If you leave your washing in the machine for over a day, please wash it again before you dry it."
"There is few things worse than being stuck in a room with someone who smells like a sewer dog."- krumpettrumpet
The Deserve Extra Care
"Wash your feet, including the bottoms."
"I had a pedicure once where the nail technician remarked that he could tell I washed my feet well."
"I said, 'doesn’t everyone wash their feet?'"
"He said 'no' and that he can definitely tell when people don’t."
"I guess people assume the soap running down is sufficient, but it really isn’t."- theithe916
If there's anything worth putting in even the tiniest amount of extra effort for, it's hygiene and cleanliness.
And no, using hand sanitizer is NOT the same thing as washing your hands!!!
Redditor Joeyniles9 wanted to discuss all the things people have done that destroy the good time, so they asked:
"What instantly kills the vibe at a party?"
Anything. Anything can kill a vibe at a party.
Especially with perfect timing.
Lights Out
"Someone putting the big light on."
templewater
"Used to work at a bowling alley. On the weekends we had cosmic bowling (dark, black lights, fog machine, disco lights). At midnight we would turn the music off and the big fluorescent lights on so people would go home. The vibe kill was instantaneous."
roguescience
GiphyElden RIng
"If the hosts are a couple, and they get into a fight."
MightyMCY
"For real, I was at a couple of friend's places for a chill party once and the guy started getting angry at his GF for asking him something while we took turns playing Elden Ring. It became increasingly awkward and they moved their argument into the kitchen, then it turned into a real fight with screaming and dishes thrown on the floor."
"Eventually when someone suggested that they calmed down and the guy became hysterical, threw everyone out including his GF, and said it was her fault the party was ruined. I took pity on her so I drove her to her place, and ended up consoling her until 3 AM. Turns out they'd been fighting before about cheating on one another.
"They're due to get married at the end of the year but I'd be surprised their relationship lasts that long."
SaliktheCruel
Nesting
"I was at a staff party with an open bar, and it reached the time when the first clusters of guests were leaving. When they went to get their coats from the closet, they discovered a young new team member who we thought had left hours ago. He had stripped off all his clothes, made a nest of jackets, soiled everything, and passed out. Killed the vibe for sure."
MistaLuvcraft
Damn Kids
"When someone gets extremely wasted and too out of control (starts to pick fights, has drunk fits, will sprawl on the ground, needs 100% supervision, has to be carried around). You just wanna chill and enjoy the party but you can't cuz you're stuck babysitting them."
Akai_Sakita
"Uggggh yeah been there, had to babysit a drunk Belgium kid (he was like 18/19) and watch half my group make out with each other in Amsterdam, killed my night hard."
NevrAsk
drunk GIF"I think the S is needed. A single, aggressive drunk can be headed off. The party can pinball them around the place and make them feel special...and, if not, push them into a ditch."
"Multiple aggressive drunks? GTFO. Now."
fishsticklovematters
Time for some coffee darlings.
Song Killer
"When someone changes a song before the best part... I've done this and got my dumba** ex-communicated... rightfully."
Employee-Number-9
Golden Girls Dancing GIF by TV LandGiphyThe Pooper
"A friend of mine announced she had to fart to the entire kitchen while she was intoxicated. She proceeded to sh*t liquid diarrhea on herself. It hit the floor, and it smelled terrible. Party ended before it really ever began. Guess she had some stomach bug or IBS or something. She ended up getting diapers for any gift-giving occasion after. No clue where she ended up, we lost touch a year or so later."
Guerrin_TR
It was Him
"One time, my brother (14 at the time) wanted to see how hard it would be to dig out a 1 meter x 1-meter square hole out of the ground (Minecraft inspired.) He spent a good amount of time over a weekend digging, until he got bored. It was mostly finished."
"Fast forward a couple of months. I throw a party at my dad's house and we're having a blast. A bonfire out back and everything."
"A kind-hearted attendee noticed the pit in the ground and made it his duty to guard the pit, for he did not want anyone to get hurt."
"Someone got hurt. Spoiler alert: it was him. HE fell into the pit - our brave guard. Thankfully, we had a sober person there and they drove him to the hospital, but that instantly killed the vibe at the party."
coolbrys
But Damn
"An overdose."
eatafetus632"
I witnessed this. The host and two friends went to a room to do a little booger sugar, but it must have been laced with fentanyl or something. They were found unresponsive - Party over, paramedics, cops, etc. Narcan definitely saved them and they made a full recovery, but damn. What a horrible night."
KurzBadger
Bar Fail
"Shortage of drinks when everything is closed."
ads5531
"Ah yes, time for the Adventure (gathers the folks for the quest to the closest gas station to buy more alcohol, gets lost twice, changes destination several times, 3 people go missing, somebody passes out, drink entire booze before they make their way back home)."
CatOfCosmos
Season 6 Trailer GIFGiphyAlways have the bar stocked!
That is party 101!!