People who were chain smokers back in the day probably didn't think too much about the harmful effects that would eventually take a toll on their bodies.
It didn't help that smoking was associated with glamour as Hollywood elites were typically seen lighting up and lounging on a chaise with a dirty martini in one hand and a cigarette in the other.
Nowadays, smoking is prohibited in many public places and is often scoffed at by a generation who knows better than to engage in a toxic pastime.
Wanting to know about more trends that are underestimated now for their health concerns, Redditor Spiritual-Ad-8523 asked:
"What’s something most people think is healthy today that future people will shake their heads at?"
We currently live with a go, go, go mentality.
But it might be a matter of time we see evidence that we've been going nowhere fast.
Hustle And Bustle
"The hustle culture. Not everything you do needs to make money. You should be able to have hobbies that stay just that: hobbies."
At One With Mother Nature
"Lack of access/time in nature."
Social media. It's a love/hate relationship.
"Social media. I'm being super hypocritical, but we're gonna look back on social media today the same way our parents looked back on the time they smoked and said 'yeah, everybody smoked back then, it really wasn't a big deal. Yeah, we knew it wasn't good for you, but we still did it anyway. No, we didn't think of it as some sort of addiction; we just did it because that's what people did back then.'"
"I already believe that the majority of fitness influencers would benefit from counselling rather than advising followers on Instagram, so that's undoubtedly the case."
"Healthy" Tip For Ya
"The majority of fitness influencers have eating disordered habits and are sharing them with their 'fans' by acting like what they do is 'healthy.' my AN recovered a** cries when i see fitness accounts glorifying actually unhealthy habits that they claim are healthy."
"people do NOT realize the damage of fitness/health social media. those people aren't professionals. and bodies aren't one size fits all."
"Constant notifications and other distractions."
"Edit: and yes I appreciate the irony of people responding to this has resulted in a deluge of notifications for me..."
"The amount of our lives we share with strangers online thinking we’re anonymous."
Don't believe everything the food industry tells you. Most of them are delicious lies–or so, Redditors say.
It's A Rip-Off
"Slimming drinks and supplements."
"From a doctor’s perspective, half of the US health food industry is absolute garbage."
- "Supplements. What’s in them? They aren’t regulated, so anything could be! Many studies have found a lack of actual advertised product at best, harmless filler such as saw dust commonly, and heavy metal and other toxin contamination such as lead and arsenic at worst. All for the cheap price of $$$ and your health. Is it possible that some could be helpful for specific things? Yup! But are most things on the shelf going to fit in that category? Absolutely not, no."
- "Most 'diet' plans/snacks/products. Low in fat but high in sugar? Serving size of 1/4 of what is sold? Contains some mysterious fruit 'scientifically shown' to combat the laws of physics? A laxative in disguise? Most of these plans are just like get rich quick schemes. They are sold to provide a quick path to a healthier and better life. But diet isn’t a quick fix. It’s a slow combination of everyday habits. Diet culture is a toxic scam and their advertisements are sickening both for the lies commonly told and the mental health toll on the targeted audience. Hell, most of the 'good choice' food items at the grocery could be considered unhealthy processed garbage."
3. "Fruit juice. Despite what Steve Jobs believed, fruit juices are pure sugar in a glass. Calories with limited nutrient content and a high glycemic load."
4. "The way we teach physical activity. We use sports as a competition and filter kids out, only supporting the best of the best financially and through school programs. But the reality is that team and club sports can keep people active and engaged in their communities for life. This is healthy. If we can foster low-level skill sports for everyone we will have healthier and happier communities. Except for maybe American football. That sh*t will give you brain injuries."
"Edit: that preworkout your friend swears by? It’s probably caffeine and some protein powder. Some of them may contain amphetamine analogues and other stimulants. The special formulations and vitamins they say they have (if actually present) are usually ineffective amounts or mischaracterizations of studies anyway. Drink an Americano and eat a diet full of vegetables, nuts, and beans, and you’ll be good to go."
I always thought microwaves were shady.
The fact that it can "cook" meals and re-heat food our food is magical and convenient as heck. But because it's not a "natural" cooking process, what kind of effects will the radioactively zapped food have in our bodies?
I ponder this as I wait for my food by standing in front of the microwave and marvel at its powers while the emanating glow gives me a slow-burn facial.
Being in a relationship can be a beautiful and empowering thing. But not all relationships make our lives better.
Truth be told, some relationships damage our well-being and impair our mental health. Some relationships can be toxic or even violent—it's important to keep an eye out for red flags.
But what are red flags? Simply put, they are warning signs that a person cannot have a healthy relationship. They can indicate unhealthy and even manipulative behavior. Excessive jealousy is something to look out for. Frequent lying is another. It's important to remember that red flags can be insidious... and that they can grow bigger over time.
The question is: What do you look out for?
Couples therapists told us what to look out for after Redditor Gnerdy asked the online community:
"Couples therapists, without breaking confidentiality, what are some relationships that instantly set off red flags, and do you try and get them to work out?"
"These are typically young women..."
"When one person is entirely dependent on the other, especially at a relatively young age. I mean financially and emotionally."
"These are typically young women (sometimes young men as well) who do not work, do not have children, stay home all day and have no friends or hobbies outside of hanging out with their spouse. Very unhealthy, and a huge red flag. Always ends in a painful and messy breakup."
"Generally, we try to get them to find a friend, join a community, get a job or volunteer - something to provide them with self worth and personal fulfillment outside of their spouse."
The idea of joining a relationship without anything of your own to fall back on is legitimately terrifying.
"One person says..."
"One partner says they’re seeking your services to help them determine if they want to stay together; the other partner says they’re seeking your services to make it so they stay together."
"Then it’s about highlighting the points and allowing the person who is on the fence decide what they want, since the other person knows."
That's so depressing, just waiting for someone to decide if they want you. Sadly, it's common.
"This comes in many forms, from gaslighting to just simple denial of another's opinion. Most of the time one or both parties are simply trying to be heard on an emotional level with an event or topic that was brought up, but the other party takes this as a personal attack on their ideals."
Do not tell someone how they feel or what they think. It won't end well.
"I saw a couple..."
"I saw a couple that was doing "retaliatory" cheating (and telling each other about it). When they got through their anger, they decided to call a truce and made peace. With their level of emotional maturity, I doubt it lasted. I don't know if I helped them or prolonged their suffering. It was their decision to come to counseling, so I think it was the help they wanted."
"Other clients realize what they really want is "divorce counselling". What's the best way to behave civilly and minimize damage to the kids while we go our separate ways?"
I think it would be great if divorce counseling were normalized. It would save a lot of people a lot of pain.
"People who approach therapy..."
"People who approach therapy with the idea that they must convince the therapist that they’re right and their partner is wrong. Almost like they’re complaining to a parent or boss to have them sort out the problems."
Pointing out all the things your partner did wrong and demanding that the therapist tell you how to fix it isn't a winning strategy for any relationship.
"Contempt. When I experience true contempt from one in the relationship I know it is usually over. Look towards a peaceful ending at that point if possible."
Ah, contempt! One of the four horsement predictors of divorce!
"When people come in..."
"One of the biggest red flags I see when working with a new couple is when they've totally forgotten the good. Part of relationship therapy is reconnecting a couple with what they like about each other, what initially attracted them to each other, and what the positives are between them."
"When people come in and they've been so unhappy for so long that they actually can't remember what it was like to be in love, or to even like each other, they're just about hopeless."
"You don't have to be happy for therapy to work--but if you can't even reminisce about the good times, then the good times are probably over."
This makes sense. Why did you get together? What did you like about each other? What do you love about each other?
It's important to keep that in mind.
"It erodes trust..."
"Couples in a tit for tat arrangement. For example: I cheated so you can have one night to cheat with whomever. Or I violated your trust and did drugs, you can go out and do whatever for one night. It erodes trust and compounds the hurt."
Yeah... nothing about that behavior is even remotely healthy. People should just leave at that point.
"I most commonly see..."
"Control to an excessive amount. I most commonly see partners having to send pictures holding up a certain number of fingers or proving that it's a live picture. This is abuse."
This is utterly heartbreaking. Hopefully these patients recognized the signs and bailed.
"Overbearing parents and in laws. I understand there's a ton of cultural nuance here, and I work with couples who have arranged marriages, as well as the south Asian community. However, when a spouse is more allied with their parents and calls them on speakerphone for fights, or often speaks ill of their partner to their parents, I usually see these couples stay very unhappily married for years."
Overbearing parents can absolutely threaten a relationship. It's important to remember that your relationship is separate from your parents — and that your partner deserves your love and allegiance.
Knowing how to identify red flags in a relationship is extremely important. In order to address them, you must learn what they look like and why they are so dangerous.
While this list isn't exhaustive, it's definitely a start. It is possible to identify red flags and put an end to toxic relationships before the damage is done.
Have some thoughts of your own? Tell us more in the comments below.
In the heat of the moment, we can say some of the cruelest things ever to someone we love.
It's a mortifying situation knowing you've hurt the person who thinks the world of you and the resulting guilt afterward can be too much to take.
But we've all been there.
And it's especially worse when regretful things are said to your kid.
Curious to hear examples of atrocious adult behavior, Redditor Few_Reading_4822 asked:
"What is the most toxic thing a parent can say to a child?"
They say sticks and stones and all, but words can hurt and their effects can be traumatizing.
"that i'm f'king useless and can't do sh*t because I couldn't open a jar of tomato sauce for my mom at 1am."
Not Being Valued
"In my experience, divorced parents that say stuff like :"
"Don't talk about that to your [other parent]" "Tell your [other parent] this" "Your [other parent] is trying to manipulate you." "You see what [other parent] did ? I'm not saying you should hate them, but isn't bit f'ked up that they did that ?"
"It really screws with the kid's head. If you're ever going through a divorce and have children, please find a way to sort your sh*t with your former spouse without involving your children more than necessary."
Parents have issues. But maybe they should keep them to themselves.
About Your Mother
"You know, my parents never divorced, but my aunt, who had an awful sibling inferiority complex, would always tell me these sorts of things about my mom and it’s kind of a similar dynamic. 'I bet your mom doesn’t love you because she always gave me and our sister a cold shoulder', 'your mom’s an awful woman,' 'I feel bad for you that she’s your mom,' etc.
"She was totally right about my mom, but still, keep it to yourself, you sad wino."
Scene At A Pizza Parlor
"We're moving and you're not welcome"
"This is what my dad said to me while blackout drunk, after he took my sister's pizza that I made, ate it in front of me, and then threw the pizza at me after I asked him why he's like that and walked away. We were supposed to be moving to a new place the next couple weeks after this fight."
Nowhere To Go
"My sister’s childhood best friend lived with us for several years because her mother made good on that very threat. Her parents were divorced and her father lived out of the area. Her mother decided she wanted to move and told the girl that her bother was moving too but she wasn’t welcome and could go live with her father instead."
"My sister’s friend didn’t want to move to were her father lived so she moved in with us and lived with us until she went away to college 5 years later."
"i kicked your mom out and i can kick you out as well."
Some people just aren't fit to be parents.
Cases in point...
"'So you're saying that I'm a bad parent' in response to any form of help-seeking of constructive criticism was the worst for me."
"My mom laughed at me when I said that I most likely have a mental illness or a disorder. Then she asked me if my grades were okay and I said yes, then she replied that it's okay."
"I've been asking her to get me therapy for almost 7 years now :)"
Siblings Pitted Against Each Other
"Constantly comparing you with your older siblings, and extremely different treatment. It makes you feel inferior to them and like no matter how much you try or do, it will never be enough."
It's Not Okay
"Over and over again for years and years. Any accomplishment any trial passed any challenge won."
Whether you've meant them or not, the negative things you've said to a child because you were frustrated over a fleeting moment, will never be fleeting in the mind of a child.
As many of these Redditors have shared, some scars last a lifetime.
It's never attractive to gloat.
Though every so often, we can't help boast about our accomplishments or the accomplishments of others.
Even so, it can get exhausting to hear others go on and on about a recent achievement.
Particularly if that achievement might not exactly be worth celebrating.
Indeed, some people are so inclined to brag about certain elements of their life, that they often don't stop to consider whether or not bringing attention to it is, in fact, a very good idea.
"What is something people brag about that they shouldn't?"
"How much xanax they took and posting it all over social media."
"So many people in my high school took xanax like it was candy and thought they were the sh*t."
"Like congrats, you're now a vegetable for a while."- slav_squat_98
"Treating people like sh*t."- thickredhead27
How Smart Are You?
"Their IQ, especially when they got it from an online IQ test."- captainmagictrousersJane Lynch You Are The Weakest Link GIF by NBCGiphy
"How much they hate their spouse yet stay together?"- holdmyicetea
"How little they sleep."- NoSexAppealNeil
"How trashed they get, every day/weekend."- King_Bean031Drunk Cbs GIF by Paramount+Giphy
"Going to work no matter how ill they are."- Reynoldssas
"Going back to work right away after having a baby."
"I had a boss that used to brag about not taking a day off even when each of his kids were born."
"I’ve met others that brag similarly."
"So, you are more dedicated to your job than your family?"
"Seems odd to me, but whatever."
"Do you."- Round-Goat-7452
"Not taking PTO on their jobs."
"Its kinda sad in my opinion."- juliani01·i feel sick flu GIFGiphy
But How Do You Really Feel?
“'I have no filter!'”
"I'm not talking about folks who, through no fault of their own, have difficulty with 'filtering'."
"This is about folks who are basically proclaiming that they're a**holes without saying that they're a**holes." - Reddit
If there's a trait anyone possesses which is most definitely brag worthy, it's having excellent self-awareness.
As they will know not to brag or boast about certain things.
But one should never expect those people to brag about anything.
They're too self-aware to do so.
Who hasn't on one occasion or another looked at someone with a svelte physique and become green with envy?
Wishing that we looked like them, and compelling us to hit the gym and lose a few pounds.
As such, we often roll our eyes when skinny folk complain about their weight and/or appearance.
But should we be throwing them the cold shoulder or offering a shoulder to cry on instead?
As maybe being skinny, by choice or simply genetics, might not be as easy or glamorous as it appears.
"What is the worst thing about being skinny?"
Lack Of Padding For Your Bones
"Its so easy to hit your pelvic bone on the side into things, and it hurts so much."- Lord_Botond
"My partner and I are both skinny."
"When we are intimate it often happens that it's just bone on bone which is not comfortable."
"Like this morning we where spooning. "
"I was the little spoon."
"And he had his arm resting on my hip."
"That's all it takes."
"There is just no soft cushion between us."- SnowdropWorks
Treated Like A Doll On A Shelf...
"People feel the need to just pick you up all the time."
"Put me down!"
"I don't care how strong you are!"- JBromsCarrying Pick Up GIF by The Only Way is EssexGiphy
More Noticeable Changes in Appearance
"People noticing every fluctuation in weight."- Own-Discussion5137
"Lap isn’t as comfy for dog to sit on."- DontStopMe_
"Do You Have This In My Size?"
"Finding pants that fit."- VigothedudepathianGolden Girls Pants GIF by TV LandGiphy
"People assuming you have an eating disorder."- Sirens-Song69
We Can Squeeze You In
"As someone who was underweight in my childhood up to my early 20’s, and suddenly obese in my 30’, It doesn’t matter what weight you are, people will always have something to say about it."
"But one thing I HATED about being skinny, was always being the one to have to sit in the middle seat in the car."- Wild-Bee-7415
No Seatbelt Strong Enough
"It's easier to be tossed around in a fight."- meitz88Shook Star Trek Voyager GIF by Star TrekGiphy
Always Needing To Bring A Cushion
"Going to an amusement park and realizing that no one else thinks the seats on the rides are too hard."
"I was in pain."- tiredfoodlover
As the saying goes, "the grass is always greener in someone else's yard."
Next time you're seated next to someone who doesn't seem to have an ounce of fat on their body, think twice before letting jealousy or judgement get the better of you.
Instead, maybe consider how lucky you are that the hard chair or bench you're sitting on is far more uncomfortable for them...