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Whoops!: Common Mistakes People Make In Their 30s

Reddit user cthulhu34 asked: 'What’s a common mistake people make in their 30s?'

Most people think that by the time they're in their 30s, they'll have their life together.

It's only when they get to that point that they realize that's not totally true.

Maybe those in their 30s have a job, are in a serious relationship, and have a home. Perhaps they're married or have kids.

However, that doesn't mean they don't make mistakes.

According to Reddit, people in their 30s make all kinds of mistakes, and Redditors are ready to share what those mistakes are.

It all started when Redditor cthulhu34 asked:

"What’s a common mistake people make in their 30s?"

Toxicity

"Stay in unhealthy toxic relationships."

– Lavenderplatte

"Alternatively, leaving healthy relationships because you’re bored and want to have fun."

– numenik

Too Scary

"Romanticizing your 20s and fearing your 40s. (live where you are)."

– theresites

"This is so good. So easy to romanticize the past and fear the future. Life is organic and so are we. We will keep changing and often times in a good way (stronger, wiser, more confident etc.). I'm so happy to be who I am at 37."

– iamnottheuser

Compare and Contrast

"Comparing their lifestyle to other 30-somethings."

– Affectionate_Item_51

"This is a good one. Your peer’s success can seem perfect from afar and make you feel inadequate."

"But if you sit down and talk with them you will learn all sorts of shortcomings and difficulties in their life that will make you appreciate something about yourself and your situation."

"In other words we all just out here tryna function."

– ThunderBobMajerle

It's Never Too Late

"Thinking they are too old. Never too late to switch career paths or look for a new relationship or start taking care of your health."

– Mans_Got_Cheaks

"Almost 40, just started my MBA. Never too old!"

– AbsoluteCP

"It's absolutely never too late. I'm 42 and honestly feel like everything is getting better, ESPECIALLY dating and relationships in general. It's a relief to finally know myself and what I want."

"Also, I'm returning to study next year and looking forward to a career change. Having a beginner's mindset, always curious and learning. My dad is an inspiration, her had a stroke in his 60's and changed his life. After he recovered, he got a divorce, moved countries and decided to study medicine. He's now in his 70's living this dream and working as a doctor. It's never too late!"

"I feel and look younger than when I was 30! I know many people well into their 60's and 80's with this growth mindset and I'm determined to be like that until I die."

– Tank_Grill

Healthy Living

"Not exercising enough and eating a crappy diet. You can't get away with those things anymore like you did in your 20's."

– DeathSpiral321

"My doc told me at the end of last year that I'm not 16 anymore and now is the time in my life where I get to decide whether I want to see my daughters grow up or whether I wanna die of a heart attack in my 50s. Sh*t cut deep but I got the message lol."

"Dropped 40 pounds since January and might be in the best shape of my life tbh."

– Misdirected_Colors

Friends Forever

"Your 30s is when you are really in the thick of "adulting". It's easy to loose focus on what is really important to you among all the demands and responsibilities."

"Not Fostering Friendships: As you enter your 30s, maintaining and nurturing friendships becomes more challenging. It's a time when connections can fade, and forming new ones becomes harder. It's very important to invest effort in the friendships you currently have. Edit: A few people have commented about what to do when people don't reciprocate? My advise - keep trying! Everyone is under water in their 30's, they likely won't be able to make every attempt at outreach you make. But over time as things become less hectic they will remember you kept trying (without guilt) and will appreciate it and come back to you. But toxic people, yeah cut those out!"

– hyperside89

Romance

"Not Nurturing Your Romantic Relationship: Responsibilities increase in your 30s like careers, parenthood, and caregiving for aging parents. It's common for the most crucial relationship – your romantic partnership – to be inadvertently neglected. Avoid taking your partner for granted, assuming they'll always be around, or treating them as an outlet for your worst moments."

– hyperside89

Be Who You Are

"Not Preserving Your Identity: Similar to the previous points, your 30s come with a whirlwind of conflicting priorities that can lead you to lose touch with your identity. It's easy to forget what truly brings you joy and satisfaction. Maintain a hobby that gives your life purpose and regularly reflect on whether your job still fulfills your needs in terms of purpose, financial stability, and overall satisfaction."

– hyperside89

"I'm 33 and in the process of rediscovering who I am, what I like doing beyond just 'filling in time' and how I like to present myself. It's scary to be caught off guard by the realisation that you don't know you and just as scary trying to start down a path to change that."

"I'm happy with my job and my role as a mother. But as an individual... I just feel like a crusty 90's kid, wearing 00's fashion and focusing on everyone else's needs because it's hard to find a direction for me that will 'spark joy'. I want my wonder and whimsy back!"

– Makasaurus

Change Always Happens

"Thinking you're a finished product, not likely to change all that much."

– kat_Folland

"Have you tried not moving in the ocean? It’s damn impossible. You can’t be stagnant in the turmoil of this world."

– quanoey

NOT Forever Young

"Biggest mistake I made in my 30's was not enjoying them more."

"Young enough to party, still play some sports, and perfectly in place in any bar. You have energy, you have a circle of friends (that will get smaller, trust me)."

"Try to carpe a diem every once in a while, the decade passes VERY quickly."

– hockeynoticehockey

"Do whatever you can while you are young. 30s is a peak time. I'm 64 now, forced into early retirement, and I can't do half the things I "thought" I would be able to do in "retirement". Can't bend to do gardening, can't climb the ladder to get into the pool, can't handle a walk for more than a few minutes due to arthritis and more. I'm mentally "still young" but my body is telling me otherwise."

– saywhat1206

Life Is Tough

"Got laid off at 32? Just said F it, got 2 degrees in different fields (37 now). But I kept expenses really low and saved/invested a lot of money when I did work. I went from medical research, to analytics, to education, to computer science now."

"30's...uhhh not starting investing by 35, because that's the last stop on the compounding train."

"Also, I see people get wrecked by bad marriages/relationships. That's probably one of the biggest wealth and happiness destroyers I've seen."

"Also, waiting over the fertility window. People tried to have kids later on and it looks like an absolutely expensive brutal experience with the OBGYN visits and the $15k USD IVF rounds (multiples). Then dating over your thirties seems like a hopeless market from what I can see. I never really tried so I dunno (data analyst in me looked over the stats as a 5'7 East Asian male in North America, I'm out!)..."

"Oh yeah!!! Health! Working out is crucial. After 40 it gets super tough to achieve any exceptional fitness goals. That's the best case scenario. Some people come down with nasty metabolic diseases like diabetes, and the CVDs - hypertension, cholesterol, and heart disease - these are very difficult to reverse and they kind of stick to you with more aggressively the longer they persist."

"Also, daily brushing/flossing, apparently dentists are expensive in older age. Brushing avoids cavities, flossing avoids gum disease and cavities."

"Also, not constantly learning about economics and economic/social/technological/political trends, because the pace of technology will wipe out people's economic opportunities faster than their head can spin. I see a lot of people get broad sided by economic malaise because they didn't get their financial house in order before a crisis hit. Life can be rough!"

– Deleted User

I'm not 30 yet, but I sure will learn from these stories!

People Break Down The Missing Person Cases That Just Don't Add Up

Reddit user yourlastnames asked: 'what missing persons case is the most confusing / doesn’t add up?'

Content warning: suicide.

There are truly some strange unsolved cases out there, but there's nothing quite like hearing of a person who has vanished as if out of thin air.

While some of these cases have been explained away or even solved, there are some that remain a mystery that truly does not add up, no matter how the puzzle pieces fall.

Curious about these cases, in particular, Redditor yourlastnames asked:

"What missing persons case is the most confusing [to you] or just doesn't add up?"

The Last Ride of Terrance Williams

"Terrance Williams disappeared in 2004. He's the subject of a fascinating podcast called 'The Last Ride.'"

"The short version is that he was taken into custody in Naples, Florida, after being pulled over in the early hours for traffic violations. He was never seen again."

"The deputy that pulled him over tried to conceal the traffic stop even from his own organization, but staff opening a local business saw the whole thing."

"When the sheriff's department finally looked into it, they discovered the deputy was involved in a similar disappearance of a man named Felipe Santos in 2003. To this day the deputy claims no knowledge of Williams's whereabouts, despite being caught out in a series of lies."

- AlanMercer

Paddy Moriarty and Kellie

"Paddy Moriarty and his dog, Kellie. They went missing in an outback town in Australia with a population of 12 people."

"They were last seen leaving the pub riding his quad bike the one-kilometer distance to his house. He or his dog have never been found and no one has been charged in relation to his disappearance."

- Bigred0762

Susan Powell and Family

"Susan Powell went missing from her home in West Valley, Utah, on December 6, 2009."

"She is presumably dead. Her husband, Josh, was the main suspect and just a real piece of work. No one knows what really happened to her."

"Sadly in 2012, Josh murdered their kids and committed suicide after Susan’s parents gained custody of the kids."

- AlexisVonTrappe

"This case is so frustrating since his brother and father are both dead too. We’ll never know what happened to Susan, but I’m positive she’s in an old mine shaft somewhere. F**k Josh Powell."

- burittosquirrel

​The Last Call from Brandon Swanson

"Brandon Swanson. He drove into a ditch and called his parents for help. They stayed on the phone with him for 47 minutes while they drove around looking for him."

"They heard him say, 'Oh s**t,' and then the phone went silent. They eventually found his car far away from where he said he was but he was never found."

- kittengoesrawr

"Reading this was absolutely chilling. It seems at first glance that it's most likely he drowned, but that really doesn't make sense because the water was only 10 feet deep and they would have found the body."

"He just suddenly said, 'OH S**T!' and the phone went silent, but he did not hang up. The phone call continued with total silence from his end. What the f**k happened to him?"

- angelposts

Babysitter Mar Lou Bostwick

"Mary Lou Bostwick. She disappeared July 18, 1972, from Waverly, New York. She was dropped off by her dad to babysit at a friend's house. This was also her 16th birthday. Her mom stopped by later with a cake and presents."

"The people in the apartment told her that Mary never showed up. However, her bag was in the residence. Nothing else was ever found."

"There was another girl around the same age, Sharon Coston, who was abducted and murdered in a nearby town about a year later. October 1983 in Sayre, Pennsylvania."

"There was a man convicted of that, but he always denied doing anything to Mary. One of the people who testified against him and was given immunity was a suspect in Mary's case. Mary's mom thinks there's a connection, but nothing was ever really found."

"I've sadly never seen anyone cover her disappearance on any of the podcasts or YouTube shows."

- Vamp459

Derek Seehausen of San Diego

​"Derek Seehausen. My friend was dating him at the time of his disappearance, and he was actively planning his future in medicine, and was last seen in San Diego."

"I saw him about two months before he disappeared. Please send any tips."

- Hereforit2022Y

The Beaumont Children

"The Beaumont Children. Three kids go to the beach, are seen with a mystery man, and never make it back home."

"Never found out who the man was or where they went. Their parents just recently died without ever getting any closure."

- snguyenx96

Xavier Dupont de Ligonnes

"Xavier Dupont de Ligonnes. The whole family (parents and four kids) went missing overnight in 2011."

"Employers, schools, and the extended family received weird letters informing of their absence or departure (one of them saying they are going into a witness protection program). Two weeks later they found the corpses of the mother, the kids, and the dog hidden behind the house."

"They investigated and retraced the father’s whereabouts in the south of France. He was last seen leaving a hotel a few days before. The region was thoroughly searched, but he was never to be found."

- z4zazym

Branson Perry of Skidmore

"Branson Perry, aged 20, disappeared from Skidmore, Missouri in April 2001."

"He was working on his house with a friend, went to the shed to grab some power cords, and was never seen again."

- AdamR91

The Incomplete Story of Marshall Iwassa

"Marshall Iwassa. Good guy."

"He came back to his hometown to visit his family and friends, and everything by all accounts was good. He left to take the two-hour drive to where he was living and never made it. Instead, it was recorded he spent the entire night trying to get into his storage unit and then nothing."

"A week or maybe more, his truck was found 12 hours away on a back road in the middle of the woods burnt to a crisp with belongings thrown about everywhere, no sign of Marshal."

"From what I remember, the family was adamant that some of the things inside the truck, burnt or not, were missing, things they knew he had. The truck was even missing parts."

"It's been four years and there's never been answers. It makes me sad and fearful of long travels. From what I know of him, he was a fantastic friend; I hope they get closure one day."

- devbot8

Out Shopping Asha Degree

"Asha Degree."

"She went missing at the age of nine from Shelby, North Carolina, United States. In the early morning hours of February 14, 2000, for reasons unknown, she packed her bookbag, left her family home north of the city, and began walking along nearby North Carolina Highway 18 despite heavy rain and wind."

"Several passing motorists saw her; when one turned around at a point 1.3 miles (2.1 km) from her home and began to approach her, she left the roadside and ran into a wooded area."

"In the morning, her parents discovered her missing from her bedroom. No one has seen her since."

- EstateWeary5789

The Vanishing Marion Barter

"Marion Barter here in Australia."

"She boarded a plane overseas in 1997 and changed her name beforehand (didn't tell family). She apparently came back to Australia for a few days (according to passenger records) and completely disappeared."

"It's an ongoing investigation at the moment, there is a podcast about it called, 'The Lady Vanishes,' featuring her daughter."

"It's so tragically fascinating."

- CuddlySubject

The Grieving Bryce Laspisa

"Bryce Laspisa."

"He was driving to his parents' house (three hours) after an argument with his girlfriend, apparently due to his alcohol and video game addiction and abuse of prescription medication."

"Partway through the drive, he pulled off the highway and just sat there… from 9:00 AM to 3:'00 PM."

"A roadside assistance guy checked on him twice and said he seemed fine and coherent, and Bryce told him he would be carrying on back to his parents shortly."

"Sometime later, his car was found only a few miles away, driven off the embankment, and he was nowhere to be found. They never found him."

- Just_Raisin1124

News Anchor Jodi Huisentruit

"Jodi Huisentruit was a news anchor who disappeared in the early morning in Mason City, Iowa."

"There were signs that she was abducted and the investigation is still ongoing with new leads nearly 30 years later."

- Have_you_eaten_yet

Three-Year-Old William Tyrrell

"William Tyrrell. In 2014, the three-year-old boy went missing from his foster grandmother's yard whilst playing with his sister. His foster mother and foster grandmother were apparently watching them play outside, and the foster mother went inside to make a cup of tea."

"They then noticed they hadn’t seen or heard him in a while and searched the house and yard."

"In 2021, police began searching national parkland near the grandmother's home for human remains. They also revealed that the foster mother and grandmother were persons of interest in his presumed death."

"Earlier today, the foster mother pled not guilty to assaulting another foster child that was in her care (a 10-year-old girl). She has also been charged with intimidating and stalking a minor. Her husband has also been charged with the same crimes, but plead not guilty to all counts. The foster grandmother is now dead."

"Basically, police believe that William died whilst in the care of the foster family, and they disposed of his body to cover it up. Police are recommending that the foster parents be charged with perverting the course of justice and interfering with a corpse."

"His photos went viral at the time of the 'disappearance,' and he went missing whilst in a Spiderman costume, and the photo that was distributed was taken minutes before."

- Red_bug91

These stories are truly haunting, and it's no wonder that Redditors have worried themselves with what might have happened to these missing people.

We can only hope that answers come for at least some of these cases and that their closest loved ones achieve some sense of closure eventually.

If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.

To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/

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But while advancements in tools and inks have opened up endless possibilities for body art, some designs have garnered a bad reputation.

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When it comes to making a point, the stronger language you use, the better.

Sometimes, this is true of insults too. If you use strong language, the insult may hurt more. This language may include curse words. A lot of times, cursing while insulting someone is a surefire way to make sure the insult lands the way it was intended.

However, this is not always true.

Redditors know it's completely possible to deliver savage insults without using curse words, and are eager to share their favorites.

It all started when Redditor ILikeExistingLol asked:

"What's an absolutely devastating insult without any cuss words?"

Bad Breath

""First of all, brush your teeth...""

– iSniffMyPooper

"I literally just brushed my teeth because of this comment. I was gonna put it off for a little later, but I couldn't after reading that."

– ClumsyGhostObserver

"A coworker who never showers, washes his clothes, or brushes his teeth was trying to intimidate me once and I told him the scariest thing about him was his breath. He hasn’t spoken to me since."

– Floptopus

"“Well, at least you have more teeth than IQ points.”"

– Average_Aloe

"About the same in his case, really."

– Floptopus

Yikes! That Face!

""I never forget a face. But in your case, I'll be glad to make an exception.""

"– Groucho Marx"

– chumloadio

""You have the face for a career in radio.""

– badmother

""...and a voice for print.""

– Byanl

If Only We Never Met

"I miss the feeling of not knowing you."

– Swivel_D

"I think Shakespeare once said something along the lines of "I wish we were better strangers.""

– Non_Music_Prodigy

Crime Against Humanity

"Have you ever considered that perhaps your low self-esteem is just good common sense?"

– pantsoncrooked

"I'd say shots fired but damn that's a nuclear warhead."

– RBpositive

Winston Churchill

"“He’s a humble man with much to be humble about.”"

"-Winston Churchill"

– Triton289

"Another Winston favorite: “Madam, I may be drunk, but you are ugly. Tomorrow, I will be sober.”"

– hdroadking

"Some lady: “If you were my husband, I’d poison your drink.”"

"Churchill: “If you were my wife, I’d drink it.”"

"May be slightly different wording."

– No-comment-at-all

"Lady Astor! She was an interesting person."

– Rare_Parsnip905

Wrong!

""I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong.""

– shaidyn

""You're entitled to your opinion. It's wrong, but you're entitled to it.""

– a_in_hd

Tough Love

"A teacher called my son success-avoidant 3 years ago and he still thinks about that every day. But it did motivate him to get an A in that class, and all his other classes too!"

– OhSassafrass

"Damn, a harsh truth can be very motivating."

– InverstNoob

What I Like About You

"“Do you know what I like about you?”"

"When they say “what?”, you reply, “See? You can’t think of anything either.”"

– Axeman517

"These are always the most devastating ones, when you set them up to expect a compliment."

– TruCelt

"It's risky though. If they actually give an answer, like some cocky "that i'm hot?" or whatever, then you'll have to think fast."

– Ketcunt

""No, that's definitely not it. I'll keep thinking, I'm sure something will come to me.""

– OnionMiasma

Rumor Has It

""I had to see for myself, but people are absolutely right about you.""

"No cussing, no meanness, but they'll get paranoid about who's talking about them and their reputation."

– NinjatheClick

Intelligence Called Out

"Your grades say marry rich, but your face says study harder."

– rrashad21

"Please donate your brain to science, at least that way someone will actually use it."

– MembraneintheInzane

Oooh!

"You are impossible to underestimate."

"You never fail to meet my expectations."

– Zyhre

Hilarious

"You couldn't guess which way an elevator is going if you had three guesses."

– Edward_the_Dog

"I love this insult because you have a moment of silence afterward as the insultee pieces it together."

– -Envixity

I love that one; it's brilliant. I'm using this as soon as I get an opportunity!