We've all seen Hoarders. We know that people have the potential to have the weirdest homes.
But we don't have to go into those places. We maintain a safe distance from them. Unfortunately, not everyone is as lucky to do so as we are.
The people who have braved these weird homes have stories to tell. We must listen.
u/Tmoses_ asked:
Dear Maids/Cleaners of Reddit, whats the weirdest thing you've seen in someone else's home?
Here were some of their answers.
It's Like A Murder Scene
GiphyNot sure if being a junk hauler counts as a "cleaner" but we had about 5 truck teams consisting of the driver and navigator cleaning this woman's house (she was a hoarder) and we found a dead rat underneath mounds of moldy clothes and boxes on an unused bed. He had a ring of walnuts around him and little tufts of what appeared to be a blanket ripped to shreds that he was laying on. The rat of course was dead but he went out like a king. It reminded me of the book and movie The Rats of Nimh.
Desperate Housewives But Like, Real
Work for a residential cleaning company for a few months. Me and one other person were cleaning a fairly wealthy family's home. Ring the door bell two young kids open the door look at us and run off. They knew us as we came to the house once a week. I take the upstairs other guy takes the main level. Hear the female homeowner yelling from her room to come look at something.
I walk into her bedroom find said home owner completely naked. It should be noted that she was mid 30's married and a very good looking fit woman. I immediately turn around and apologize profusely. Homeowner laughs and says it's ok I don't mind I needed you in here. Me confused talking through the door asks how I can help. She asked that I pick out clothes from her dresser and bring them to her (10 feet away I might add.)
(The only reason I didn't run away is that these people always tipped big and every encounter with them was always extremely odd.)
I gathered all her clothes bring them to her. She asks for my help getting dressed. I decline saying that I didn't feel that it was needed nor did I feel comfortable (I'm happily married) in the situation. She once again laughs and proceeds to stand up dress herself, hand me a $100 dollar bill, and go about the rest of the day like nothing happened.
I'm extremely confused, talked to my buddy about what had happened come to find out it had happened to him too. We started to ask other people that worked in the house before if they had experienced the same thing. After talking to a few people one guy said he banged her and when they were done the lady's husband came out of the closet. Turns out he's a major cuck and she just likes to bang. Also, we found out later they had always requested guys to clean and would not allow any of the female cleaners in the house.
Talcum What
I had a summer job as an apartment maintenance worker. My cousin was the head maintenance man so I kinda just got hired to help. Im not that handy. But the office workers called us in one day and asked to accompany them to an apartment unit because the man who lived there was 2 weeks past rent and they weren't able to get into contact with him.
Mind you, this is an upscale building. The apartment we went into was like 3k a month. But we walk in after knocking and immediately notice a white powdery tint over mostly everything in his unit. Like all of the table surfaces and counters, the tv, the furniture, etc.
We looked into one of the rooms and we see hundreds of empty baby power bottles basically filling the whole room. The worst was the bathroom. It was caked over everything. We were all pretty creeped out and ended up leaving. The leasing staff investigated online and turns out it looked like this guy had an extreme baby powder fetish of some sort.
They ended up evicting him and hiring a professional cleaning service to come clean the whole unit. By far the weirdest thing I've ever seen.
How Do People Live Like This
My dad and I have a junk hauling company and one job was the most disgusting jobs I've ever had. it was a chain smoker couple who got evicted. I was expecting is was going to be a small job so we got to this house and it stunk outside so bad I almost barfed multiple times. but when we went in it smelled like the inside of a landfill. But we had no choice so we went in and the fridge was dumped and it had a lot of meat and shattered jars all over the house. We found A lot of hypodermic needles, porn magazines and a sh*t load of cigarettes on the floor when me and my sister were working upstairs my dad went downstairs and these people grabbed a pipe wrench and broke all sewage lines flooding the basement.
Arrrgh, Me Booty
I was house/pet sitting and found a huge piratey looking treasure chest in the client's side yard. Massive wooden trunk, at least as big as a standard car boot, outside partially under a tarp and wrapped up in tape.
No idea what was in it, but I clearly watch way too many crime documentaries because to this day I still wonder if there was a dead body in there.
I'd Rather Die, Honestly
Not a cleaner, but my mom briefly worked for a company that cleaned college dorms for use during the year. Surprisingly, most of the dorms weren't out of this world disgusting, some trash and a couple stains to scrub out, whatever. But one dorm in particular she said had literal human sh*t everywhere; the walls, the doors, the ceiling, EVERYWHERE. Hearts and smiley faces of all shades of brown were smeared into the otherwise crisp white walls. The fecal matter murals drove her over the edge, as she has a strong stomach, but she never worked for a cleaning service again after seeing that dorm.
Daddy Paid For This...Dearly
There was no news story or I would certainly site here... from what I remember the home owner when I was there got the house from her dad. I'm 90% sure that her dad had been missing for years and the police suspected that it was his goop and "remains" in the bathroom. I don't know much more than that because after I gave my statement and the police let my boss know what was going on I left.
Gimme A Break, Gimme A Break
Someone tried to shred Kit Kat wrappers. I now have a habit of manually cleaning the shredder to check for weird stuff.
Likely a kid trying to hide evidence of their candy sneaking habits. I visited my sister a month or two after Halloween, and when we pulled out the sleeper sofa candy wrappers SHOWERED onto the floor. Immediately knew which my nieces it was lol
Popo With A Sock Fetish
Both my mother and sister sometimes clean houses for extra cash on the side.
My mom used to clean a younger (early 30s) cop's apartment. He was unfazed when she accidentally sent his iPad mini through the wash, but got really angry when he found out that she had done them same to his entire collection of crusty socks.
Your Stomach WILL Turn
GiphyGo to my first solo job working for the company. Homeowner isn't supposed to be home and they gave me the code to the garage. Walk into the house immediately hear and feel wet carpet. It was urine. Could hear a dog barking upstairs and decided the dog must have had an accident. Walk past the piss to a tile section of the house and see what looks like a murder scene. The kitchen is covered in what can only be described as goop of yellow and orange color. I decide I needed to investigate the rest of the house before I started working.
Look in the first bathroom covered in literal sh*t and a scum that can only be described as play dough mixed with motor oil. If that's not odd enough I keep hearing what seems to me a person moving around upstairs. Walk into the master bathroom and immediately knew I needed to leave. The floor was yellow and brown, the tub was covered in red, yellow, brown and green goop/film.
Boss comes by goes in house (thinking I'm overreacting) comes back out with a horrific look (same one I probably had) and calls the homeowner. Turns out the homeowner was home the entire time. My boss said we would not clean it they needed to call a hazmat team. Turns out hazmat team wouldn't clean the house either. Cops get called, Someone was murdered (years before) and the goop in the bathroom was human remains.
To say the least I didn't work for the cleaning company again after that day.
Just like any dog!
My old roommate worked for a cleaning company. He regularly cleaned a house belonging to a well known local politician. This guy apparently had a spot in his shower where he regularly peed. Literally an established pee-corner that was gross and stained and had urine buildup. Erdnuss19
Freeze!
Found a gun one time. zenmia
Buffalo Bill? Is that you?
GiphyA little hollow turtle filled with cut fingernails. UrthenAether
Nope. I came here to read about finding weird sex toys. Did not come here for this. I will still upvote but consider this a warning. ScottsTots2013
Too much #2....
GiphyDiarrhea on the ceiling/walls/floor, turds under the bed and in the closet. BrigandsYouCanHandle
RIP Bugs....
A dead rabbit. It was their pet. It's was their daughters and she started crying so much that I had to clean the house again. Ohgod420
Child's Play
GiphyNot a maid anymore, but I used to long ago. Strangest thing was a bathroom that had 3 foot tall clown dolls lining the upper part of the wall all the way around. sarajane82
I had my grandmother do this for me with porcelain dolls in my room. I loved it as a child but looking back it was creepy as hell. Woshambo
How Special?
GiphyA cookie jar filled with eraser shavings. Febuarie
Maybe they were saving it for something special..? Tmoses
Got a Permit?
A taser. silliputti0907
At least it wasn't a coconut... Thalida87
This thread... I am not disappointed. No sex toys but really crazy storyies, way better than expected. Thalida87
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"What's the most mysterious thing happened in your life that you can't find any explanation for?"
Mom Acting Weird
"My mum is a type 1 diabetic, has been since she was 11 years of age."
"When me and my little brother were very young, I was about 7 and he was 5 , I came into my mum's room to find she was acting extremely strange."
"She looked almost drunk, and wasn’t really responsive."
"I went to pick up her insulin needles to see if she would react to that and she didn’t."
"So I panicked and phoned my Nan who told me to put the phone down and dial 999."
"For some reason I was so frightened and confused I didn’t, and sent my little brother outside to get help while I tried to get my mum to respond to me."
"My brother came back in crying saying he couldn’t find anyone and then about five minuets later this woman just walked into my mum's bedroom, called me by my name, and my brothers, said she knew my mum and help is coming, she was calm, soft-spoken and had a warm feeling about her."
"I didn’t recognize this woman and neither did my brother."
"Shortly after the ambulance arrived and got my mum's sugar levels back up."
"And when I went to find the woman, she was gone."
"Like literally gone."
"When my mum came round I explained to her about this mysterious woman and what she looked like."
"And my mum had absolutely no idea who she was, and we never saw her again."
"If she didn’t help us my mum would have died eventually."
"Still gives me shivers now."- leeshouse90
Portrait Of A Lady On Fire Neon Rated GIF by NEONGiphyPsychic, or lucky?
"When I was around 18 a friend and I were traveling in Europe."
"We were walking along a pleasant, quiet street in Rome one day and saw an elderly homeless man sitting on the street."
"He said to us if he could guess our date of birth could we give him some money?"
"Of course we said ok."
"He did it! "
"He told us both our correct dates of birth!"
"Never met him before and never saw him again."- robertodurian
Some Unfinished Work, Maybe?
"I was at my mother in law's flat in Hungary."
"Fyi I don't speak Hungarian, so I couldn't be aware of any of this."
"I tend to go to bed later that my wife, and for the first couple of nights, I had trouble falling asleep because around midnight I could hear the neighbor upstairs."
"It's an old block of flats made under the communist era, walls are incredibly thin."
"Walk in high heels, which was very annoying."
"I could also hear little objects fall on the floor, and I told my wife it sounded like the plastic buttons you have on some clothes."
"She looked at me funny and told me her niece hated to sleep in that room because she was scared by the noises coming from upstairs."
"I said that was a bit exaggerated, and I thought it was until my wife told me the flat upstairs had been empty for the past at least 4 years."
"Neighbor died years before that, and guess what?"
"She was a tailor, always nicely dressed and wearing high heels."- mimzou
High Heels Shoes GIF by Real Housewives Of CheshireGiphyGone Without A Trace
"When I was a kid, I participated in Big Brothers Big Sisters, which if you don't know what that is it's pretty much just a mentorship program in the US."
"I basically just hung out with this dude Chris for a couple hours a week."
"We'd go to the movies, out to eat, he'd help me with my homework, that kinda thing."
"One day, he tells me that he's going to Baltimore for a couple weeks and when I should expect him back."
"The day rolls around and I give him a call to see if he's back yet."
"A man whose voice I didn't recognize answered and I asked if Chris was there."
"He said no."
"I asked him when Chris would be back just kinda thinking it was someone staying at his house or watching his dogs or something."
"But he said that I had the wrong number, that he and his wife had lived there for years, and there was never a Chris there."
"I double checked in the phonebook to see if it was the right number which it was because I had it circled."
"I was confused so I just said sorry and hung up, and I never heard from Chris ever again."- theautomemoriesdoll
A Clever Distraction?
"When I was 10 or so I was staying at my grandma's over the summer break and we were having breakfast."
"We barely started eating when the phone rang."
"She left the dining room and I followed her thinking that maybe they were my parents calling."
"When we returned most of the food was gone."
"She asked me if I ate while she was on the phone and I said 'no'."
"There was no one else home and there were no pets."
"My grandma just shook it off saying we might have eaten more than she remembered but I am absolutely positive that I had at most two bites of my toast by the time the phone rang."- queenliz2fr
Hungry Good Morning GIF by HBO MaxGiphyMystery Benefactor
"Every month around the 5th I get a letter with exactly 23 dollars."
"No note, no return address."
"I’ve asked family, relatives, friends, the two past occupants of this apartment."
"Nobody knows anything about it."
"It is not addressed to me, but to my unique postal address."
"The total is now exactly 1886, I have just stashed it all in a box."
"I do not want to spend it in case it is cursed."- Puzzleheaded_Ad928
A Comforting Sign
"My grandmother always loved roses and had them growing in her back yard."
"She died in a December and when we were gathered at her house for the funeral my father happened to look out the back window and saw a bright red rose had blossomed."
"It stood out brightly against the snow."
"He brought it in and put it in a vase on the kitchen table."
"We all left for the funeral and when we came back the rose was on the living room floor."
"No one had been in the house while we were gone."
"My father is the most hard-headed person alive but he was convinced it was his mothers way of telling him she was all right."- regular6drunk7
Mystery Portal?
"We have a built in wardrobe in our bedroom."
"About a month ago our cat had managed to get herself inside and I must have closed the door."
"I heard her meowing and I opened the door and she jumped out and walked off."
"Silly cat."
"I closed the wardrobe door."
"Less than five minutes later I hear a meow in the wardrobe, I open the door and to my surprise, our cat jumps out again and walks off."
"My partner and I were both stunned as there is no way into the wardrobe with the doors closed."
"Neither of us have any idea how this happened."- TorthOrc
Cat Jumping GIFGiphyLost Time
"I had just picked up a coworker from her house heading to work.'
"We are just talking and chatting, "how'd your weekend go" type of stuff."
"We are maybe 5 miles away from her house, when all of a sudden, we realize we are in town pulling into works parking lot."
"We both kinda look at each other not sure what happened."
"We had gone near 20 miles in a blink of an eye."
"And what cemented this experience as something that I actually happened, and not just simply losing track of time, IS THE TIME!"
"It should have taken us almost half an hour to get to work."
"Instead the time from when I picked her up was 2:30."
"And the time when we got to the building was 2:40."
"There is no way in HELL!"
"We couldn't have gotten there that fast."
"From that point on we both called that experience the time when we Jumped, like from the movie Jumper."
"I have no explanation why."
"I'll also state, I don't believe in the paranormal or supernatural."
"So this experience is one of those things that makes me question my own sanity."- belac4862
car dark GIFGiphyThere must be an explanation for these circumstances...
Even if it's not an explanation that will make any sense, otherworldly or not.
What is a great example of 'f*ck around and find out'"?
Never Be Afraid To Seek Help
"Hey remember how they said drugs can ruin your f*cking life?"
"Turns out that was true."- WowAPenguin
They Put Up Those Walls For A Reason
"People who die after going over the safety fence at zoo, or basically any safety fence."- Solid_Refrigerator16
They Can't Say They Weren't Warned...
"Those who go deep cave diving and ignore the warning signs."- somekindofmiracle
cave GIFGiphyNever Stand Behind Them...
"Jacka**es who come to the stables I ride at and act weird around horses."
"Those animals play no games."- clem82
Is It Really Worth It?
"Running of the Bulls in Spain."
"The videos each year of the people getting completely annihilated by the bulls is a great example."- getagrooving
Never Get Too Big For Your Britches...
"When I was young I boxed and eventually got into golden gloves."
"I got a few wins under my belt and said I wanted to fight someone legit, someone who would be a real challenge."
"An opportunity came up to fight someone very good, a guy who'd eventually win regional and state and later go pro."
"At this point I'd not lost or even been knocked down, so my confidence was high, that is until he knocked me the hell out very early in the fight and taught me that there are BIG differences in the different talent levels of fighting."-Reddit
episode 2 boxing GIF by Archie ComicsGiphySharks might be the least of your problems...
"Go swimming outside the flags in Australia."- d*ckflip1980
Clown Behavior
"When people were dressing up like clowns to scare people."
"It kinda stopped after one got shot."- BigMaraJeff2
Or With Anything Dangerous...
"Playing with electricity."- tlmega124
Jack Nicholson Hair GIF by MOODMANGiphyThey Won't Harm You If You Won't Harm Them...
"People that approach wildlife in state parks."- Rider-of-Rohaan42
Best To Keep Hands And Feet Out Of Moving Vehicles...
"Your boss at the warehouse is constantly telling you to keep your feet within the confines of your vehicle, and not to hang them, and to stay clear when walking, because if you don't, a 6,000 pound+ vehicle impacting a fixed surface will turn your foot into spaghetti sauce."
"Do not f*ck around, ever, with industrial vehicles."
"Follow all guidelines, always."
"A powered ride-on pallet jack weighs as much as 2-3 small cars, when fully loaded."
"It will absolutely ruin you if you don't operate safely."- SpaceCorpse
Still Probably Best Not To Do It At All!
"My uncle was a high-profile defense attorney specializing in folks who were arrested for drug trafficking."
"The greatest advice he ever gave to me was, if you want to smuggle ANYTHING, you can do it one time."
"Just once."
"After that, you will be caught and you will be f*cked."- redoctober2021
Confusing On So Many Levels...
"Trying to armed rob a gun store."- VagabondTexan
You'd Think People Would Have Learned By Now...
"Taking Julius Caesar hostage."- EgoSenatus
caesar GIFGiphyNo One Is Invincible...
"Ye saying he can’t be dropped by Adidas, then immediately getting dropped by Adidas."- Admin_Untold
It's one thing to make a mistake after being a bit too hasty, and not giving something enough thought.
But if you end up in the ER after being urged not to do something, and well aware of what might happen, don't expect too many flowers...
Redditor Sir_Baconstrips wanted to see who was willing to discuss actions made while randy, so they asked:
"What's the biggest mistake you've made because you were horny?"
I can't tell you mine, because my mom might read this. But Reddit was more than happy to share.
History Help
Hide Reaction GIF by florGiphy"I browsed porn and then I asked my mom how to delete the history."
Ramon80589
What was that?
"Probably my most embarrassing moment. Was on my work computer (family business so nothing locked) and it was a super slow day and I was alone. Anyways was doing a classic 3 min facebook check and scrolled down for a second and saw the news post about Adriana Chechik injuring her back in a foam pool. Figured top comments on that would be golden. Read one funny one that said 'her and her scene with [performer I can’t remember] is still goat.'"
"Never heard of said performer so I got curious and google her. Of course photos never do justice, had to see the performance ya know? So I clicked a random video, quick glance and thought 'meh' and was about to close the tab before I noticed my mouse twitch on the screen… What was that? No.. that wasn’t mouse error, that was someone… then within seconds I realized the accountant who taps in remotely to finish work came in at that exact moment that I had a browser open for less than 60 sec."
"The worst wart was I could have sworn I had all those remote services off, but she tried to tap in for over an hour and must of did something to wake splashtop (probably had it on some type of standby mode). She even called earlier but I saw a random number and was speaking with a client and ignored it."
"Anyways, decision time, do I call her and play it off as nothing or apologize? Naturally as a fearful 28 year old I play off as nothing. I call, no answer… then a few minutes later i get the call back and her words after exchanging 'hellos … are you finished with whatever you were doing…' still burns me."
Satmatzi
Years Later
"Let my (ex) boyfriend dry-hump me for an hour on a bench outside after summer school."
"The bad news: this bench behind our school was also beside a swimming pool. Where parents were taking their children for swim lessons. Eventually a staff member came out and yelled at us for being inappropriate."
"I still have shame flashbacks today, over 10 years later."
hannlouiseols
Size Issues
"I had a one night stand with a guy who was, in retrospect, seriously self-conscious about his penis size and kept going on about how if it was on the small size it was just because he has to have sex with it a few times and it would gradually get bigger until it was it’s 'true' size. I really didn’t care."
"But then to make himself feel better he turned it around and started talking about how big and wide my vagina was but kept reassuring me that it was ok because he liked the challenge. I wish I had snapped my legs shut and given him the boot right then and there."
bewarethes0ckm0nster
In San Diego
No Money Bangladeshi GIF by GifGariGiphy"Lost my entire tax refund and got my phone stolen at a strip club in San Diego."
BigFatPapaBear
Always check your pockets on the way out.
The Reward
Happy We Did It GIF by StoryfulGiphy"Hooked up with a girl at a party. Just kind of bored, drunk, and horny. Having to go to the doctor for a case of pubic lice was my reward for poor self-control."
No_External7289
Dedicated...
"I got my first serious gf in high school. She was two grades below me. So when I finished third year and moved 500 km south we was still a couple. I was so in love (and most of all horny) I commuted every. Single. Weekend. And I was poor. So I took the bus to the nearest station after school. Waited for the long distance bus for 4-5 hours."
"Went to a larger city to hitchhike my way there. I was there Friday night or Saturday morning. Locked ourselves in her bedroom and went at it until Sunday morning. I made my way down to school again and went to class straight from the bus Monday morning. This went on for almost a year…"
pelo_ensortijado
I'm Out
Chris Pratt Running GIF by Parks and RecreationGiphy"Was trying to get with a girl in college. We were texting and I asked her what she was up to, she said she was training for a marathon and going to the gym and asked if I wanted to come."
"I ended up running 9 miles before I tagged out. So now I know how far I'd go to have sex it's up to 9 miles."
euesquecimeunome
Lord the things people will do when slightly turned on.