Nothing screams "I have no power" more than your mom's extremely bizarre and/or undesirable BF when you're like 7 years old.
Okay so first let's acknowledge how hard single parenting must be. I barely manage to eek out cooking for 1, being on time for doctor appointments, and not spending my money almost entirely on band t-shirts so I can't save any money.
But when your head's on fire taking care of work, yourself, and your--possibly multiple--kids, it might put your love life in a total fugue state.
u/lifeingminor asked, Children of single parents, who was the worst person your parent has dated?
Major Beefcake
My mom dated this guy named Rick. He always smelled like beef. All the time. He would come over and the living room reeked of BEEF!! I would beg my mom to let me leave whenever he came over but she said that would be rude. So I just had to be in the same house with that rotting meat basket called a man. He was over one morning when i had a late start. I went to school and a girl called me "Beef Bitch". I cried for hours. Rick and my mom broke up because he got a job in another state and they hadn't been dating too long so they decided to split up. My mom still wont tell me why he smelled like beef. She says it's his personal business
GiphyPicturing This One in Those Candy Cane Stripes
Ronnie, He was a carny that my mother met at the local fair....whirlwind relationship that didn't last long, he didn't appreciate being dumped. He broke into the basement of out house late at night and used a set of tires and gasoline to start a fire under the stairs......I woke up in a house fire.
I taught my kids to tie their shoes and never trust a carny
GiphyThey Were Outta Dip, I Didn't Know What Else To Bring
This woman brought a loaded pistol to a party my dad was at because she couldn't get in contact with him (this was before cell phones)
What is Convenient About Marrying Elvis??
A a semi famous at the time Elvis impersonator/singer for a band that had some success and he's incredibly cocky and arrogant. My mom ended up marrying him but they live in different states and only see one another here and there. It turned out to be a marriage of convenience after a few years.
GiphyIt's the Cat That Gets Me With This One
One wanker called Darren. I have a viral infection once that mimmiced meningitis and he kept banging on about if I died he wasn't cleaning it up and that I may need a wheelchair. I punched him once when he tried throwing my cat outside into the rain. He's fu**ed off now thank god
And How Exactly Did She Expect That to Happen?
My dad started dating a woman who firmly believed that I was part of his "old life" and that he needed to cut ties with me.
I was 14 and became terrified my mum would find someone who would do the same, and I'd end up with no family.
Specific About a 10 Year Old is a BAD SIGN
Some guy she met at a bar. He was really interested in meeting her children; specifically 10 year old me. Within two hours of him coming into the house he had invited us all out to a nude beach nearby. It was very freeing, he insisted, and he thought I would love it there. Mom didn't make him leave the house for the night, and I slept in her room with the door locked.
Old Flames
My mom got back together with her old high school boyfriend for whatever reason. Guy was like 60 but looked about a minute away from death. Super lanky, reeked of cigarettes. Not a bad guy but his general hygiene and health made him hell to be around.
Who In God's Name is This Person's Uncle
His name was Jeremy, the only man my mother ever had around me. He would beat me and try to bribe me with toys, but I wasn't a normal child, I wasn't interested in toys and couldn't be manipulated. A very long story short, I told my big uncle, the criminal, the one that was fiercely protective of my mother and I and Jeremy was literally never seen or heard from again. Whatever my uncle did to make him go he did a damn fine job, he made sure I knew he was always there for me.
Polite, I guess?
My mom dated a guy named Mike, he had this weird rule that when he called the house (this is 1997-98 before we had caller ID) he would let it ring twice, hang up and call again when we would be good to answer it. I was probably 10 during this, I remember not liking him and would answer the phone first ring every time just to piss him off. He wasn't a bad guy, just a giant douche.
The Spook!
The spook. My mom had a thing for government operatives during the Vietnamese war, particularly this guy Roy. Once when I was on the phone too long and she out with him and was trying to reach me, he had the phone company operator break into my conversation and put her on the phone to me. He was also running operations in Cambodia and Laos. Creepy guy.
Just As Fast As He Came In
Definitely the guy, who after over a year of dating my mom and seemingly caring for both her and I, called her one night and said he never loved her and to not contact him again. No signs showing this is how he felt. He broke my mom for awhile. I definitely wanted to find him.
Thumb Ring's are Strange Beasts
I mean there were so many but I think it's a tie between the pathological lier, the one with anger management issues and the weed addict with the thumb ring.
Woah.
My dad DATED this lady that had like 4 kids. They lived with us for a couple months cause their "apartment wasn't ready". It was weird. Also she's the lady my dad cheated on my mom with and she cheated on her husband.
Little of the Secret Sauce in There
My father dated a weird lady who used to casually tell me how he was an amazing lover (I was like 9, so disturbing). I'm also pretty sure she tried to kill me once. She had really long fake nails and "lost" one as she was making cabbage rolls but didn't say anything until after I almost chocked to death on it. My choking did not seem to surprise her one bit, she didn't move a muscle to try to help me or even apologize after.
GiphyDammit, Chad
"Chad" is the only swear word in our house. Our mom used to date this douchebag when my littlest brother was a couple years old, and sadly he picked up some of his habits. Funniest thing was is this a**hole got karma big time. He adored his cars so much and every time he got a new one he'd hit a deer.
GiphyAt Least You Can All Go Out for a Drink
My dad is currently dating a girl my age. He's 53 we're 22. So there's that.
Walter White as a Stepdad
He turned out to be a high profile dude related with crimes. I can literally search his name on google and articles about his deeds will appear.
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.