Top Stories

People Who've Cheated On Their Partners Share The Real Reason Why

People Who've Cheated On Their Partners Share The Real Reason Why
Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

Many relationships that have soured tend to lend themselves to infidelity.


Yet, people who have fallen out of love with their significant others make the conscious decision to stay in their respective relationships anyway.

Why is that?

Curious to hear from heartbreakers on the internet, Redditor Tsuibug asked:

"People who have cheated on their partners, why?"

For some, it was motivated out of retaliation.

A Harsh Lesson

"I was In the Army; I married a girl from my hometown. She kept cheating on me and accusing me of cheating, it must have gone on for 4 separate guys before I finally cheated on her."

"The reason I did it was I felt like a fool being faithful to someone who obviously didn’t care about how I felt."

"Even then when I did it; I had a stomach ache and did not feel any less of a fool in fact; I felt like a bigger one. I felt empty and hollow."

"It was when I was overseas in Korea attempting to fix things that she had a 'friend' over while we were face timing. Her replies were cold and unwelcoming even though we had agreed to work it out. She kept looking over the device and smuggly smiling at someone. I was done, over it. I didn’t speak to her again until the divorce hearing."

"A lesson well learned."

– ExistenialPanicAttac

The Three Positions

"I have been in all 3 positions."

"Been Cheated On."

"Been the Cheater."

"Been the Person Someone Cheated with."

"Almost all of them come down to insecurity, you get a sense of power, invincibility, ego boost in 2 of those 3 positions up above."

– DeadEyedAdmin

Power Play

"I've cheated because I was trying to get some of that power back. I was with someone who made me feel insecure and powerless, and someone else came along who made me feel good about myself for a little while."

– propagandavid

Mistakes made early in life can usually be more forgivable.

Young Love

"I held hands with another girl when I was in 5th grade. Very ashamed to admit that."

– JustJuiceJury

Chalking It Up To Immaturity

"I was young, immature, full of myself and lacked feelings."

–Successful_Present39

The "Player Phase"

"Same. In my early 20s, I was insecure, jealous, anger issues etc. A over all pos. I called it my 'player phase' but it was just toxic behavior. I grew up(thank god), met my gf and been together for 10 years, getting married next month. Never have and will never cheat on her. As corny as it sounds, she's my soul mate."

– skynetempire

The One Regret

"A lot of it had to do with age and immaturity I agree. If I could go back in time I wouldn’t have hurt as many girls as I did, that’s the one thing I regret. I am also dating and living with someone who I am going to marry one day. I just wish I didn’t hurt many others to get here."

– Successful_Present39

At least these Redditors are self-aware.

Not An Excuse

"Misery. Not an excuse, but it is the reason."

– CottaBird

Eventual Path To Happiness

"We hadn’t had sex in over a year. We had turned into just good friends who cared about each other but physical passion was gone. There was significant liquor involved when it happened. I feel bad about it and would take it back if I could but I can’t. I was honest about what happened and we broke up. We are still close friends and we still care about each other a lot. She has found someone else who is better suited for her than me and I’m very happy for her. In a way, it was the catalyst to us doing what needed to be done in the relationship (breaking up) to make us both happy."

– MrPrissypants13

When Compatibility Is An Issue

"Not sure if it's cheating or not but I tried to break up with my ex and she started crying and pleading with me to give it another chance which broke my heart and I reluctantly said okay. Tried again a couple weeks later because the relationship wasn't getting any better but same thing happened. She was a really nice girl and we got along well but our personalities were way too different and I wasnt willing to make her my life partner."

"I decided to go on a wilderness backpacking trip by myself to clear my head. At work I told a girl who I knew through mutual friends about it and she said she's never done a backpack trip and always wanted to, so I jokingly invited her and to my surprise she accepted and was super excited."

"During the trip we really got to know each other and I decided I would like to pursue a relationship with her. We slept in the same tent and drank whiskey under the stars but I didn't try to kiss or get sexual I'm any way because I was still technically in a relationship."

"Once we got home I broke up for good and 3yrs later we are engaged. Turns out me not trying to make any moves on her made her trust me more than any other guy and we are living a great life together!"

– byhi3

It's easy to forever peg someone as a cheater after one regrettable moment of weakness.

But based on some of the responses above, the reasons for cheating are much more complicated than you might think.

Still there are no good excuses for deceiving someone to whom you're presumably devoted.

Want to "know" more?

Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.

Things People Secretly Love But Would Never Admit To In Public

Reddit user sweet_chick283 asked: 'What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?;

Collection of VHS tapes
Bruno Guerrero/Unsplash

What makes us all unique is our passions and the things we love, whether it's singing in the shower, reading books, or listening to specific music artists.

Unfortunately, we live in a world where we are judged for our various tastes and interests thanks to social media, and it makes us consciously selective about sharing the things we love on the internet.

Curious to hear about people's personal desires under anonymity, Redditor sweet_chick283 asked:

"What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?"

These aren't really chores for the following Redditors.

Good Clean Fun

"Mopping, im a janitor and generally hate my work... but damn mopping is so good."

– MrDDog06

"When you have a great rhythm going it is something special. I get the same feeling while I vacuum, but won’t let my wife know I enjoy it."

– Bogus_34

Act Of Unwrinkling

"Ironing clothes. A dozen of them. Can’t explain how it relaxes me. I told one person and they looked at me like I’m crazy."

– eerie_white_glow

"My mum misses the days when dad would be out on a Friday night, my brother out with friends and me upstairs quietly playing PS1. She would pour herself a Bacardi & Coke and do the ironing while watching her TV shows."

"I'm sure she doesn't really miss it now that we've moved out and they've retired but it was her wind-down after a busy working week so I can see how people can find it relaxing."

– xdq

Our solo actions can spark joy.

Big Brother Is Watching

"pretending to be on the Truman show and whenever im in my house i act all inconspicuous so they dont know that i know that they’re watching me."

– Bec_121

"C’mon man, you’re not supposed to let him know. You signed a contract when signing up for live views. I’m reporting you."

– doeswaspsmakehoney

The Multi-Tasker

"Playing video games naked at home while eating cheese."

– thickening_agent

Releasing The Kraken

"I love the feeling when you've eaten good fibre and let out a solid long train log in the toilet. That feeling is heavenly."

– therapoootic

"Even better when it’s a clean wipe and not a poo crayon."

– TheWarmestHugz

Ultimate Comfort

"My (male 41) weekend routine is coming home from work, make hot chocolate, start a fire, dress in a ugly pink nightgown made for old ladies and watch forensic files."

– crazyloomis

Some people are obsessed with collecting things.

So Kawai

"Sanrio stationery stores. All those different multicolor pens, a thousand kinds of erasers, spiral bound notebooks galore... my kids sadly have absolutely no appreciation for this wonderland..."

– HavingNotAttained

It's A Staple

"Office supplies have a weird, special place in my heart ever since I was a kid. They don't even have to be 'cute' necessarily."

"Japan's legendary stationery stores is unironically a reason I want to go."

– _CozyLavender_

Not Caring Anymore

"The older I get the shorter that list gets. Not because I love less things, but because I don't care about hiding it."

– Bi-Beast

"YES!! I'm 53 now. I'm working my first job in public since 2006. Today is Halloween and we're allowed to dress up so I am sitting here waiting to go to work dressed as a VERY bad Wednesday Addams. My bf said I'd 'look stupid' because no one else will probably dress up and I'm like, 'WHO CARES!' My makeup looks horrible and not like I practiced, but I DO NOT CARE! I'm having fun with it anyhow and I don't care if my coworkers dress up or not. I'm bein' ME! :)"

– deanie1970

Honorable mentions start here.

The Savior

"Picking up worms from the street and sidewalks when it rains and moving them into the dirt so they don’t burn in the sun, every time it rains I do this."

– sky_kitten89

Hero Of The Moment

"Yoooo I scoot SO many snails and worms. I work as a tech/mechanic at an automotive shop, I had a peoject car towed to my house the other day and it was covered in snails. I saw them when the tow guy/coworker was unloading and I was like, 'oh! It comes with free snails!' and began moving them. He laughed then realized and said, '... Oh, you're serious. Uh... Okay.'"

"I don't care who knows it. These little things barely can look out for themselves, why shouldn't we if we can take a moment to help? I don't care what happens next, it probably doesn't matter overall but I can help this moment."

– chris14020

Why should some of the hidden desires mentioned above have to be secret?

Redditors opening up about some of these would make them a hit at parties–no shaming.

As a matter of fact, I'll totally be down for a Forensic Files viewing party where we all make hot chocolate, light the fireplace, and cozy up together in our respective pink ugly nightgowns for old ladies.

historical reenactors
Sigmund on Unsplash

We've probably all heard some variation of the saying "Truth is stranger than fiction."

Real life isn't just strange, it can also be downright ridiculous.

History is riddled with moments of absurdity.

So ridiculous that people have a hard time believing real life is, well, really real.

Keep reading...Show less