People value honesty but it's pretty difficult to be truthful to ourselves all the time. And while most of us abhor outright lies, sometimes we just can't help convincing ourselves something is true, even when it's not.


rhodium_chloride asked, What are the biggest lies people always tell themselves?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.

This works precisely never.

Giphy

I don't need to write this down, I'll remember it.

VictorBlimpmuscle

Unhappy with your partner? Dig yourself in deeper.

Giphy

Adding more responsibility will fix a marriage/relationship. Things suck? Have a baby

Still sucks? Buy a house together

Still sucks? Time for another baby.

Sometimes entrenching your lives closer together doesn't work. Sometimes you have to step away.

satanshonda

HA yeah okay.

Giphy

I'll wake up early and finish it in the morning.

dirtytoot

It's not like we go to meetings...

Giphy

"I'm not an alcoholic."

Yeah, sure, everybody keeps vodka in the washing machine, Mom.

Touristupdatenola

Looking at you, Virginia and New Jersey.

Giphy

I'm a good driver, it's everyone else who is terrible.

tampers_w_evidence


There are never enough McNuggets.

Giphy

I'm only going to get the 6 chicken nuggets meal at McDonald's and not the 10.

isabelrich

Dark, dude.

Giphy

That tomorrow will be better.

sick_of_your_BS

Actually... this isn't a lie.

Giphy

"Socialism never took root in America because the poor see themselves not as an exploited proletariat, but as temporarily embarrassed millionaires."

RoleModelFailure

Right, "healthy" people *never* just keel over.

Giphy

You're only as healthy as you feel.

-RadarRanger-

Learn how to be happily single before seeking a relationship.

Giphy

"Being in a relationship will complete me and fix my life."

No, it won't. Get your life together, improve yourself.

BlakeBurna

Except, Reddit.

Giphy

I'll go to sleep in 15 minutes.

TheEggMan01

This is skilled lying.

Giphy

Kids have the worst lies. My niece made a bowl of ice cream for herself when she wasn't allowed to. When confronted she said the cat made the bowl and ate it, not her.

Evelyn_Kluge

How else are people going to recognize power?

Giphy

Codpieces are out of fashion.

AncientCodpiece

Nope.

Giphy

I'm going to afford it some day.

nxtnguyen

You're not.

Giphy

I'm fine.

phillyCHEEEEEZ

Keep dreaming.

Giphy

This is gonna be on the top of the sub.

TheTrueTaterTot

If by a couple you mean 12...

Giphy

Couple beers won't hurt.

BigHoss47

What other choice is there?

Giphy

"Everything's going to be okay, it'll all work out in the end." I'm a single mom and this little mantra has gotten me through some times that I didn't think I'd make it out. But it's okay everything will work out in the end because it has to, I have no other option.

_meganlomaniac_

How many days in a row can you wear the same hoodie?

Giphy

I'm not like other Redditors.

tonytwocans

Sorry but no.

Giphy

"There will always be a second chance."

Sometimes, there isn't.

commonvanilla

Christmas is upon us. It's time to get those Christmas present lists together.

So... who has been naughty and who has been nice?

Who is getting diamonds and who is getting coal? Yuck, coal. Is that even a thing anymore? Who even started that idea?

There has to be some funnier or more "for the times" type of "you've been naughty" stocking stuffer.

I feel like the statement coal used to make is kind of last century at this point.

Apparently I'm not alone in this thinking.

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I admit, I love my stuffed animals. They're the best.

Some of them have been with me for years and I have them proudly displayed in different spots around my apartment. And when I've packed them for a move, I've done so with all the tender loving care I can muster.

What is it about them that stirs up these feelings?

Believe it or not, it's quite possible to form emotional attachments to inanimate objects!

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Nik Shulaihin/Unsplash

They say your 30's hits different, like one day you're young a hopeful and the next day you're just WAY too old for this.

What is the "this" you're suddenly too old for?

No idea. It's different for everyone, but make no mistake, it'll happen to you too.

Maybe it already has?

Giphy

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Do all mothers go to the say mom school or something? Because they seem to share the same advice or go on the same platitudes, don't they?

Here's an idea.

Maybe they're just older, have more experience, and are trying to keep us from being dumbasses in public. At least, that's what I think.

I'm definitely grateful for my mother's advice—it's saved me more than once—and it seems many out there are too. And they all seem to have heard the same things from their mothers, too.

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