Look, us here at George Takei Enterprises (not our official name) in no way support or endorse the actions described below. It would be ethically wrong and potentially incriminating to say that any actions describe thereafter are acceptable or endorsed by us, or society as a whole.
Still, you do what you gotta do. Life is hard. Get what you can out of it, right?
Reddit user, IFeelSorry4UrMothers, wanted to know what to keep their sticky fingers ready for when they asked:
"What's okay to steal?"
The thing is, sometimes the thing you're supposedly "stealing" is not really being stolen, per say, in that if the people who knew you were taking it would file charges or anything.
Sometimes they just don't care.
Getting The Work Done No Matter What
"WiFi from the Jack in the Box by my house."
KittenPics
"Got through grad school leeching from an unsecured signal"
cavegoatlove
"My first apt in 2010 didn't have wifi and there was no way 19 year old me could afford it. Luckly back in the day most people didn't secure their wifi so I had ~8 options."
pokemonprofessor121
We're All Under One Together?
"Living over a decade in Japan, I've come to the conclusion that umbrellas are fair game."
PM_ME_ALL_UR_KARMA
"Take an umbrella, leave an umbrella"
AZBreezy
Take As Many Pacifiers As You Can. Trust Me.
"After giving birth, anything in the hospital room that’s not nailed down."
MamaRebbe
"Kid was in NICU for two weeks after birth. The nurses would give me a new pack of preemie diapers every time I used more than 2 or 3 from a pack of 20, same for those Similac nursettes that came in six packs. I swear I went home with hundreds of diapers and formula bottles. Bless them."
Palolo_Paniolo
"It gets thrown away when you leave so…take it!! Less work for us. Also, formula and diapers are given free to hospital to create new consumers for that brand. We hand them off like hot cakes to help families but also, to screw the mega corporations. We are like drug dealers getting you addicted to pampers or Huggies, lol!"Sol_Luna70
The Office Space Is Entirely Open For Grabs
"Honestly? Where my fellow corporate office supply kleptos?? Don’t lie…"
C-O-double-M
"When I was getting out of the Navy packing up to move. I found about 150 black "For Official Use Only" pens. I kept 10 and took the rest back to the shop."
EducatedEvil
I Mean, Yeah, Sure
"2nd, 3rd, or home in a baseball game."
ElGrandeRojo67
"Stealing 1st would look hilarious because you know the pitcher would just be standing there like "tf do I do?""
orionthehoonter
"You can if the catcher misses"
Zkenny13
"For those not as well versed as u/Zkenny13, if the pitcher throws strike three and the catcher doesn't catch it, the batter may attempt to "steal" first. It doesn't happen often, but it does happen."
"If it does happen, the pitcher is still credited with the strikeout, but it ruins any perfect game attempt."
DasPuggy
It's Build Into The Price
"I have few,"
"Soda from McDonald, ask for water (free) and drain it or drink it and pour soda on it"
"Napkins from any restaurant"
"Ketchup"
"Plastic spoon and fork"
AllenProduction
That Ol' Moral Quandry
"Food. I feel like if someone is desperate enough to steal food they really need it."
DonAskren
"Sanitary products, diapers, baby food. If you ever see a poor-looking/homeless person stealing these expensive necessities, please do not report them to the store manager. These are essentials, most of which happen to be expensive. And if it’s baby-related, don’t report it for the sake of the baby :/"
Ligma_ballz973
It's "The Code," Apparently
"I’m a young female and one “ girl rule “ I would say is common to know is if you see a woman steeling period products( such as pads or tampons ) or baby products like milk or diapers, you do not say a word. You don’t know if that might be a mother who can’t care for her child because of financial problems or mental health. It could be a woman who can’t afford menstrual products. Even if it’s neither of these you never know a person’s situation and it’s better to stay silent."
Cheesefan1
Weird Some Places Put Laws On This
"Trash. It was thrown away, so no one needs it anymore. Stealing trash is actually illegal in my home country, Germany."
DartmitBart
The information super highway is a glorious thing, allowing you access to a myriad of products with a click of the 'Purchase' button...
...most of the time.
Where All My College Students At?
"Academic papers and textbooks. The actual authors don't see a cent of it, it all goes to the publisher who gets to charge like 40 bucks to read it once. Oh and also in order to submit to those journals, you have to pay for it."
Inkuii
"Definitely don't ever type "sci-hub.se" into your browser of you're looking for access to a paper. It certainly doesn't have a database of pirated journal articles, or really practically anything with a DOI..."
"ETA: you also definitely can't download the file as a PDF. And clicking the source on the left side will NOT copy the citation to your clipboard. And it's absolutely NOT mirrored at sci-hub.st or sci-hub.ru if your ISP blocks it........."
Lestalia
"For academic articles, if you email the authors they'll almost always send you their paper for free and be really happy about it too"
fluffytedy54
Higher Learning Should Never Be That Much
"E-Textbooks"
-ImpliedConsent
"Pearsons can go f* themselves."
lorenzomofo
"YES. The online textbook viewer is awful too."
"Once I had to buy a $230 Pearson math textbook, I hated it, and it had multiple wrong answers in the practice question answer key... I returned it 2 weeks later and just found a pdf online"
Taco_Guy3
Up, Up, Down, Down
"Old Nintendo games. If they refuse to maintain their old game systems then there's nothing wrong with emulating them."
User Deleted
"Yeah if you can't even buy a game anymore, there is no ethical argument against pirating."
"Technically you can track down an old physical copy, but at that point you're only benefiting some reseller, not the people who actually own the rights to the game."
itsamamaluigi
When You Absolutely Have To Edit A Picture
"Adobe products"
dansla116
"I’m still using a copy of Photoshop 6 that fell off a truck back in 2000."
mandobaxter
"I’m in my 40’s and pirated my fair share of adobe products over the years. A few weeks ago my teenager was trying to find an old pc game on steam etc. and couldn’t even find a way to buy it. I showed him how to sail the high seas and find it. Today he came to me and said “dad, I found cracked adobe premiere and got it to work”. Don’t think I’ve ever been prouder"
Trill_McNeal
This "Stealing" Is Certainly A Lifestyle Choice
"i think its okay to steal anything. the punishment you get for stealing shouldnt be because you stole. i think it should be because you got caught. think about it, if you steal a twix bar no one is harmed by it. there are millions more being made and thousands more at stores. as long as you dont get caught stealing or harming anyone, ANYTHING is okay to steal."
waq_lol
Just a reminder: The law is there for a reason.
But, you know, be smart about it.
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"What makes someone bad in bed?"
WHERE TO BEGIN?!
The list is endless.
Half the time all it takes to be better is a little effort.
RedditorMidoriSpicewanted to hear about the lack of skills some people really need to acquire when it comes to sexy time. They asked:
"What makes someone bad in bed?"
I love sex. But it can be stressful. I've always found connection to be one of the best lessons.
Communications
"Assuming they already know what their partner wants/likes and doesn't communicate or take any instructions."
Melonqualia
Take it Slow
"No foreplay and not caring if your partner is enjoying it."
orangecrushhhh
"I had an ex who literally never wanted to do any kind of foreplay. He just wanted basically sex of any kind for him. He said oral on women was gross."
UntiltheEndoftheline
Will U?
"Proposing mid intercourse."
Immortal_D_Class
"Honestly? With the partner I have, I'd think it was pretty hot and romantic lmao. I'd check in after the deed to make sure he was serious but our relationship is already very serious so it wouldn't be a big deal."
Weird_Spinach
Talk to Me
"Not talking or making any noises. We don't have to dirty talk the whole time or even at all but you gotta let me know you're enjoying it at least."
idkburneridkidk
"I think there's some balance between having some small talk, silence, and dirty talk while being in bed with someone. Or maybe that's just been my experience. I don't know--I think there's some fun in trying to carry a side conversation while having sex lol."
BranTheBrokens
Experts
"Friction isn’t always a good thing."
KathAlMyPal
Yuck
"To this you can add unclipped fingernails."
Whats4dinner
"And dirty fingernails. Nah, ma'am. I’m betting this is not worth the infection. Thanks."
ADDYISSUES89
‘good at sex’
"I have a feeling most men will say 'lack of enthusiasm' and that most women will say 'being selfish about pleasure.'"
addicted_to_blistex
"I’m a woman and my first thought was lack of enthusiasm, but my own lack of enthusiasm. The only bad sex I’ve had is when I don’t genuinely want to be there. I’ve had sex with guys who weren’t ‘good at sex’ but still enjoyed it because I was really into them."
maybememaybeno
Damn Pat
"They are convinced they know more about what works for you than you know yourself. Just cause your ex-lover Pat liked technique X doesn't mean everyone does."
Less-Market9641
"Have experienced this, it sucks. He wouldn’t listen to what I enjoyed, didn’t want me to say ANYTHING even if it hurt or wasn’t working, and would just say something along the lines of 'every other woman I’ve been with liked it.' I’m thinking, all you’ve had are one-night stands, really, so they probably didn’t say anything."
"I’ve had numerous partners and love sex. Crashed and burned with this one and he really crushed my self-esteem and sexual confidence."
Proper-Beach8368
I KNOW!!
"The biggest thing is always going to be selfishness and the inability/refusal to communicate and listen to your partner. I've seriously had a guy yell 'I KNOW HOW TO DO IT!' when I was trying to tell him how I liked whatever he was doing. He then got even more upset when I said 'did you just f**king yell at me? Alright, off, I'm done.'"
drunky_crowette
Flavors
"Lack of variety. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean crazy kinks or positions from the karma sutra, but more when it's really predicable. I has an ex that had this weird routine of positions, it was exactly the same every single f**king time in exactly the same order."
thegrimrita
Sex. Let's be better at it.
Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.
Love is so elusive these days isn't it?
Who knows what anyone is looking for in the relationship department anymore.
It's all too exhausting.
But people we keep trying.
RedditorProblemNice5257wanted to hear why so many people are still on the hunt for that perfect one. They asked:
"Why are you single right now?"
I'm single because I've given up. And I'm good. For now.
Peace
"I put absolutely no effort into meeting someone."
grayestorm
"Same! Also it's extremely difficult when you feel so at peace being by yourself. The fact that I have to find someone whose presence outweighs my level of comfort being alone seems impossible."
cheezkurls
Staying Put
"Hard to meet people when you are a hermit."
EchoOfShadow
"Yeah, I describe myself as a shut-in, lol. I leave my apartment to work, I leave my apartment to buy food, and occasionally I’ll bring out the trash, otherwise I just watch Hulu, play online chess, surf Reddit."
Tru-Queer
"Same. I've spent months trying to find an apartment I can afford without a roommate and finally settled on a small studio apartment for $1100 a month because I'd rather living in a tiny space and be left the hell alone than share a much nicer place even with a good friend."
ablondedude
Problems
"I have too many unsolved issues, i can't in good conscience bring someone else into them."
Zdos123
"Idk your issues but everyone's got some crap. Not sure how unique yours are but everyone's got some crap. It's good to share some of your struggles with other people. Just don't open with it haha."
dr-305
"Issues unresolved or not, (in my case) only makes it worse when you feel like you could open up to them, and they just take those to use it against yourself afterwards."
if_itsMolly
Isolated
"I hardly go out and expose myself to people. I'm uncomfortable with the notion of myself being in a relationship at this point. Also, I'm very dry in terms of personality."
Torturephile
"I spent a year entirely isolated due to covid and now I can't handle physical contact. It makes me really uncomfortable and a hug is enough to make my body shut down. I'm hopeless."
DinoHunter64
That's funny. But it feels oddly true.
Toxic
"Last relationship was so toxic, I've sworn off dating, at least for awhile. I haven't had this much free time in ages. It's nice."
"Edit: Hey, it's really great hearing from so many people with similar experiences. Like many of you, I've been taking it in stride and focusing on bettering myself, both physically and mentally. It's done wonders for my health and I feel a whole lot better. I wish y'all the very best. Stay excellent, my friends."
muchkoku
Alone Forever
"I'm 35yr old single father to a 5yr old and I work nights. It's hard to find free time to meet someone, especially in my area. If I do have free time to myself, I like staying home and ordering a pizza while drinking some beers and playing video games. I pretty much faced the fact that I will probably be alone for the rest of my life."
No_Leader_2711
taking space
"I was in an 8 year relationship (married for two) to my high school sweetheart. Exactly this same time last year, we got divorced because I found out he was cheating on me with my best friend. The best friend I had known LONGER than him and was friends with since fourth grade."
"She was living with us to try to get back on her feet. Yeah lol. So I lost my best friend and the man I had been with for 8 years within the same night. So I moved to another state, got an apartment by myself, and am now single and divorced all by 26. Not really looking unless the right person comes along."
"It’s pretty happy and peaceful now that they’re both out of my life though honestly. You realize people’s toxicity and flaws the most once you get space away from them."
yodacat24
Bad Loop
"Because my relationships end before they even begin."
_uberwench_
"This is my story right here."
xxshole
Alright. Now that we've laid out all the excuses, let's get to matching with some people.
There is no bigger mystery than what happens to us after we die.
But even those who don't practice an organized religion tend to believe that there is a Heaven, a happy joyful place where our souls will remain for eternity.
No two people share the same idea of what heaven would be like, but everyone who believes in it probably has an idea of the first thing they'd do after entering the pearly gates.
Redditor WeDidItGuyz was curious to hear what would be top on everyone's list upon entering the afterlife, leading them to ask:
"If heaven exists, what’s the first thing you’d do?"
Overcome with joy
"In all reality?"
"Probably cry for about 30 minutes because the biggest existential fear at the very core my humanity has now been lifted."
"If Heaven exists, like 50% of the awesomeness is just the very fact that it exists."
A re-match long in the making
"Ask my childhood friend Kevon for a race."
"He used to beat me handily when were younger (9-13) and he’d always brag."
"When I got older and faster I moved away so I was never able to race him again."
"We arranged for a race but he was shot multiple times and bound to a wheelchair until he passed a few years ago."
"I wanna race him both in our prime."- Abethegreat1
Reunite with loved ones
"Find my husband, give him a huge hug and never let go again."
"Live our forever together."
"I f*cking love him and miss him so much."- jessdfrench
"Embrace my sweet wife and tell her how proud I am of the kids."- RifleShower
"Try to find my brother."
"Man, I miss him."
"He died in 2020 at age 34."- grummlinds1
Achieve the "firsts" we never got to do
"Find my son and have a beer with him."
"Something we never got to do in real life."- tanukis_parachute
Hone new skills
"Try to play Smoke on the water on my harp."- Ashtar-the-Squid
Live on without pain
"Enjoy my healthy back without pain."- Knackbein_
Who knows what's in store for us after our lives come to an end.
But living with the idea that something wonderful awaits when our time has come is all people need to continue to live their lives to the fullest, and treat others with the respect and kindness they deserve.
"Fun facts" generally refers to a tidbit of information about a specific topic which the general public might not have otherwise known about.
But the first word in that term can be misleading.
Indeed, some "fun facts" reveal information that isn't remotely "fun" in the slightes.
Redditor Alternative_kachocho was curious to hear some "fun facts" which were anything but fun, leading them to ask:
What's a 'fun fact' that isn’t fun at all?"
Ironically, something you likely don't think about...
"Your brain blocks you from feeling your organs moving around inside you."- Aydengeist06
Try watching Finding Nemonow...
"Only one in a thousand sea turtles born actually make it to adulthood."- Sebs_123
Shocking new light on an age old classic
"In the books, Stuart Little was never explicitly called a mouse."
"He's pretty much described as a deformed mouse-esque person born form human parents."- Red_Beard47
Nature running it's course...
"There's a bird that feeds its younger offspring to the eldest."- Teacup_Cult
I have no allergies... yet
"Speaking from personal experience here, but your body can randomly decide to become allergic to damn near everything edible at any time."
"Not very fun."- smallemochick
Those poor, innocent creatures.
"In some regions of Australia, 90 percent of koalas have chlamydia, which poses a threat to the species' extinction unless a vaccine is created or widespread koala culling takes place."- tiffanyjcruse
They'd still be here if they weren't so delicious...
"The giant tortoise was so delicious, it caused not only itself to be hunted to extinction, but also the dodo."
"Giant tortoise meat was supposedly better tasting than chicken."
"It's fat tasted better spread on bread than butter."
"Also, it was the perfect food for sailors at the time, as their bladders stored 1 litre of purified water, and they could survive without food in hibernation for almost a whole year in the hull of a ship."
"Not to mention, because they evolved without humans, they were easy to hunt."
"You could tie one to your back, and roll another to the ship and they would just let you."
"It was so delicious, they went unrecorded for a long time because expeditions to bring living samples of wildlife to Europe kept eating them on the way."
"Conversely, the dodo, while as easily captured by sailors, tasted awful."
"It was completely unpalatable."
"HOWEVER, one day, someone discovered if you cooked dodo meat in the more delicious tortoise fat, it tasted just like chicken."
"So now, sailors were hunting a few tortoises at a time for their fat and water, storing them, and then hunting dodos on the daily."
"Overhunting, plus the introduction of rats to the environment (because sailors) which would eat eggs, led go the population to decline at a rate they could not breed to keep up, leading to both animals going extinct."- Kyhan
Don't forget the nose plugs
"Antarctica smells like penguin poop."
"Antarctica is a desert, it is too cold for bacteria to live."
"Nothing there to clean up penguin droppings."
"If you are close enough to see penguins, you will also smell them."- gummby8
Makes those long lines so worth it...
"The TSA missed 96% of contraband during an inspection in 2015."- omegasix321
Truly tragic.
"The person who had the first facial transplant had her face chewed up by her Labrador dog while asleep due to sleeping pill overdose." - User Deleted
It's hard not to read some of these "fun facts" and wonder if there should be an alternative term for the facts which aren't fun.
Alternative facts?
Oh yeah, probably not....