Biliginual People Share Times They've Overheard People Trash Talking Them And Clapped Back[rebelmouse-image 18346009 is_animated_gif=
Even if you think the other person can't understand you.....they probably can. And then that's very embarrassing for you. So just don't do it or you might end up like these people.
Here are some of the stories.
Dolor[rebelmouse-image 18346548 is_animated_gif=
I'm white but reasonably fluent in Korean. When I went to an orthopedist in Korea for elbow pain a translator was provided by the hospital and I figured I might as well talk through him in case there was any specific medical terminology I didn't know. After describing my symptoms and a brief physical exam where I was visibly in pain, the translator told the doctor that he thought I was only pretending.
The thing was, he was doing an absolutely terrible job of translating even prior to that, so I quickly responded 'and you're only pretending to know English' (in Korean). The doc actually cracked a smile and the translator spent the rest of my visit sitting in his seat without saying a single word.
Funny, But Whoops![rebelmouse-image 18345572 is_animated_gif=
Kinda the reverse, was visiting Hiroshima in Japan and walking around alone. Then i see a caucasian guy walk up to me, and in fluent Japanese asked me to take a photo of him in front of one of the monuments. For context, I'm Asian but I don't speak a word of Japanese. So after a couple of seconds i said "Uh.... do you speak English?".
Awkward silence ensues. He goes "uhhh... yeah". Easily made my day. We did make small talk after (oh hey where are you visiting from, etc) but went our separate ways.
Life Lessons[rebelmouse-image 18346549 is_animated_gif=
Almost been on the other side once. I live near german border. Once, together with my wife and daughter we decided to go to nearby german town for shopping. While we are entering a mall, my daughter (`13-14yo) tells me how cool is that nobody really can understand what we're talking about and we can practically say everything we want. In the same moment, security guard standing next to entrance grins and greets her with perfect polish "Dzie? Dobry". (Good Morning)
I didn't realize that her skin tone could get that red. I just thanked that man for mild but practical lesson.
Disgustingly Rude[rebelmouse-image 18346551 is_animated_gif=
First time I visited Montreal was on a school trip. I'm from Alberta, and our hotel receptionist knew this. I guess she had assumed we couldn't speak French, which, looking back, was pretty stupid of her. What kind of school would send non-French speaking kids to the only French province? Anyway. One of my friends was having an asthma attack, and the receptionist muttered under her breath, "étouffé, s'il te plaît." (suffocate, please) To which I responded, "Madame, parlez-vous à tous vos clients de cette manière?" (Madam, do you speak to all of your customers this way?) Not super clever on my part, but it shut her up.
Inspiration[rebelmouse-image 18346552 is_animated_gif=
Was sitting on the London tube on the way back from a long day at work, and overheard two older Irish ladies who had moved to London a good 40+ years ago speaking to each other in broken Irish.
They had just come from a Irish meetup event and were lamenting the fact that the Irish language was slowly dying off.
I was dressed in my suit like all the rest of the other city drones so there was nothing to single me out as Irish. (p.s I'm not ginger :) )
I leant over casually with a smile and said "Níl an teanga marbh fós" which translates to "The language isn't dead yet."
The surprise on their faces, and the smiles that followed were priceless, will never forget it! ?? ????
Ohhhh![rebelmouse-image 18346554 is_animated_gif=
I've got two cases of this. One is me, one is an old co-worker. I was on a train in the UK recently and it was pretty full. There was a French couple stood near me who ended up trash talking the people around them. As soon as they got to me, I interrupted and said "Stop. I understand you." They eyed each other and shut up.
The other one is the flip side! Ex-colleague's friend is on a train in France, drunk and trash talking (in English) one particular woman sat a couple of seats behind. The woman doesn't interrupt and sits listening to it all. When it's time for her to get off, she walks by the ex-colleague's friend and says "I understood every word you said." The ex-colleague's friend almost died of embarrassment and shut up for the rest of the journey.
Trash Talking Their Own Country[rebelmouse-image 18346555 is_animated_gif=
I was on vacation in Turkey in 2016. On the first day I was at the beach like everybody would do. Of course I didn't know my way around the hotel so I just left my towel on the beach chair and went to my room to go on the toilet instead of aimlessly looking around the place for one. When I came back to my spot there was an older russian couple taking the chairs next to me. I laid back in my chair, put my hat on my face and just tried to snooze for some time in the shade.
A couple minutes later I hear the woman next to me saying "Look at those germans! Sleeping until until noon but always having to reserve the best spots early in the morning! F-ing nazis!" (in russian of course).
Some time later I woke up and had to pee again. I put my hat on the table next to me and asked them in russian "Do you undertand russian? Do you know where the nearest toilet is?".
The woman was turning so red you could mistake her for a tomato. Her husband told me where to go and so I went after I said thank you - in russian again. When I came back they were gone. I haven't seen them again until one week later on the flight back. To Germany. In the seats next to me.
I said I had hoped that they have enjoyed their vacation and asked if they mind me taking the seat next to the window so they wouldn't have to wake me mid flight to get up. While I didn't get any sleep on the flight they also haven't said a single word. Turns out they are living just a couple streets away from me since we all took the same subway and tram back home after landing at the airport.
Remember Finland[rebelmouse-image 18346556 is_animated_gif=
I live in Finland and every summer we get some obnoxious middle aged tourists who feel free to comment on people's appearances in plain English. FYI: everyone here understands you from age 10 to 60 at least.
Little Snap Judgements[rebelmouse-image 18346557 is_animated_gif=
My family is Georgian (the country) and I speak Georgian. This December, I went to visit family with an American friend. I stand out a bit but usually I'm not a dead giveaway, however she was. We (or I guess just I) overheard more than a couple of pretty rude, but honestly kinda funny comments in the streets, mostly from older people commenting on us being American and "dressing weird."
Disarming[rebelmouse-image 18346558 is_animated_gif=
I'm one of the palest people I know, add to that blonde hair and a thick, northern (UK) accent I look like the last person on the planet to speak a middleastern language. We married into an Egyptian family and we spend plenty of time there, my Arabic isn't amazing but I can get by. I live for the horrified look on people's faces when I switch to Arabic. I used to do debt collection for a utility company and had a gentleman who refused to pay his bill. He called me all kinds of horrific names, I quickly told him in Arabic that I absolutely wouldn't tolerate language like that, that I was trying to help him and that he was bringing shame on his family. He stuttered for a good few minutes, apologized and ended up paying. However I got into trouble at work because all calls are recorded at the call centre and management were unable to review my call because they couldn't understand what I was saying. They were worried I could have said something offensive etc. So from then on we were forced to use professional translation services only on three way calls, which was an absolute pain.
Mountains Of Embarrassment[rebelmouse-image 18346560 is_animated_gif=
Mine is a pretty general story. Nothing too exciting but it still makes me grin when I think back on it.
Was traveling in Austria, getting on a shuttle to go from Innsbruck to a small little town higher in the mountains. I was chatting and laughing with a few friends as I got on, my American accent on full display. There were two older women who gave us weird looks as we boarded, and we sat down across the aisle and just behind them. Almost as soon as we sat down, one turned to the other and said in German, "Stupid American tourists are always so loud." I was sitting nearest to them on the aisle, so I leaned forward and said in my far less perfect (but still understandable) German, "and you're not as quiet as you think."
It was a looooooonnggg ride of pleasant silence up through the mountains.
Compliments[rebelmouse-image 18346562 is_animated_gif=
I look quite not italian, but certainly European, long dark hair and quite pale skin. At the time I was on vacation with my family, including my old grandpa suffering from Parkinson's and dementia and I was in the best shape of my life. We were visiting Italy and looking at all the old stuff my grandmother remembered while I pushed her around in a wheelchair in the hilly cities around the Garda Lake.
One day while my family and I were taking a stroll, I notice two ladies in their 40s discussing me in German, a language I don't speak, but definitely understand. The conversation sounded a bit like:
"Look at that handsome young lad. Pushing around his grandmother, he is so nice"
"And good looking too!"
Bad news my father and stepmother I was travelling with also understand German and I haven't seen my dad with that kind of s*-eating-grin for ages. So now I get teased about pulling old German ladies at family dinners.
Dutch Oven[rebelmouse-image 18346563 is_animated_gif=
Just recently when I was in Malta. My friend is Bulgarian and she has friends from all over the place there too, so we all speak English. However I'm dutch and when were eating at this restaurant, there was this one old dutch couple relatively close to our table. The guy kept swearing because he thought we were too loud, but we really weren't, it just seemed they were a bit bitter and sour because they had nothing to say to one another. Swearing in dutch is a bit special too since compared to most languages it's incredibly harsh. It's basically wishing diseases like Cancer and Typhus to one another.
At some point he was just kind of mumbling swear words one after the other pretending to look outside the window, when even his wife was telling him to stop. So I turned and I asked in dutch "everything alright, nice weather out isn't it?" They replied back in kind and I didn't hear him swear for the rest of the evening.
Stop!!![rebelmouse-image 18346566 is_animated_gif=
I know a decent amount of ASL (American Sign Language) and was in my second college course learning ASL when this happened.
My younger sister's friend was going to buy a puppy and wanted me to go so she wasn't meeting strangers alone. The group of people we are meeting get out of the car and we realize they are Deaf.
The girl selling the puppy to my sister's friend starts talking to her and I'm just chilling off to the side.
Another girl and a guy were off to the side also. The girl was signing stuff about me and my sister's friend being 'hearing' and just rude stuff in general. I don't remember much, but the guy noticed I was watching the conversation. He told the trash talker to quit because he thought I could understand what she was saying. She blew him off and continued.
Eventually my sister's friend buys the puppy and as we are saying 'goodbyes' I sign, "Thanks for meeting us. Have a great day and have a safe drive home." I swear to god the dude that was telling the trash talker to be quiet earlier about pissed his pants laughing at her. It made my day.
My Glasses Can Hear, Too[rebelmouse-image 18346567 is_animated_gif=
I went on a vacation to the keys like a year ago and I walk into the bathroom at my hotel and as I'm going to go into the stall this Cuban janitor lady sees me and tells me in broken english that I can't come in.
I say okay and as I'm leaving she says "Tiene espejuelos por gusto, No ve ni pinga"
Pretty much saying I have glasses for no reason and that I see f-ck all.
Now I'm a 6"1 white-skinned dude with light brown hair and green eyes, Far from a typical Cuban.
I walk back inside the bathroom when I hear her say that and tell her
"Miss, I'm Cuban too, I heard what you said"
She gets red like a tomato and denies ever saying anything.
And An Insult, Too[rebelmouse-image 18345371 is_animated_gif=
I am fluent in Spanish because I lived in a Spanish speaking country and my wife and her family are all native Spanish speakers. But as I am fairly pale most dont expect me to speak Spanish.
One day when I was working retail I was helping this Latino family: abuela (grandmother), husband wife and kids; who all spoke English very well, buy a computer.
Since they all spoke English I didn't mention me being able to speak Spanish. However when I recommended a more expensive computer that they were looking at (the one they wanted sucked and wouldn't have been good for what they wanted to do). The abuela spoke to the husband in Spanish saying "this gringo doesn't know what he's talking about get the cheaper one".
I looked her dead in the eye and responding in Spanish said "I actually know exactly what I'm talking about as I have been doing this for many years." I then turned walked away to check and see if we had the one I was recommending in stock. The abuela didnt say another word the entire time they were there and they bought the computer I recommended.
Another story is my wife and I went to the Mexican consulate and when I asked a security guard where the bathroom was, he responded to me in broken English that it was down the hall to the left. it happens constantly.
Learn Your Lesson[rebelmouse-image 18346568 is_animated_gif=
I was living in Jersey and got into a taxi. The driver was on the phone and started talking in Spanish to the other end about me; how he just picked up some white girl and then must've answered the "What does she look like?", saying I was cute for a white girl. I'm very light-skinned because I take after my dad, who's Cuban. My mom, who is Puerto Rican has very dark olive skin.
Once he got off the phone, I said to him in Spanish that he shouldn't always assume someone is a "gringa" just because he thinks they look it. His eyes about bugged out of his head and I laughed. He started apologizing and told him it was ok, because he didn't say anything too badly, but that I hope he learned a lesson.
Harrassment[rebelmouse-image 18346569 is_animated_gif=
Not me but my friend. Arabic is her second language (her dad is Jordanian, mom is american). At the grocery store the two young guys in line behind her at check out were going on and on in arabic about her large breasts and what they would do to her. Finally she's had enough and turns around let's them know she understood everything they just said. They were obviously shocked, embarrassed, and said nothing.
Turned Out Great[rebelmouse-image 18346570 is_animated_gif=
Somewhat related. I was on the bus in Chicago and there was a bunch of Chinese students on the bus. This old -ss white guy comes back there asking if it's the "Chinese section of the bus?" People are looking up slowly like WTF is this going? Old guy busts out some perfect Chinese. He'd traveled all over China with his brother after WW2.
Goodbye Losers[rebelmouse-image 18346571 is_animated_gif=
We were visiting the Grand Canyon, and found ourselves on the same tour bus as a group of Germans. At the time, my mom was particularly heavy, which I guess one of the Germans took personal offense to, and loudly told her friends as much. Several laughed.
So my dad speaks German, and had a big issue with this, so he starts laughing with them and says in German, "that's hilarious! I like to tell jokes too. Want to hear one? It's about some very stupid Germans."
Needless to say, they did their best to avoid us after that.
He actually only recently told my mom what actually happened on that bus (at the time, he told her he accidentally offended them). She thought it was hilarious.
Most of us have had at least one bad roommate. I had several at one point... and those were enough for me. Think about it: Large house, a bunch of different people... there was bound to be friction. I don't miss those days. The food lying around, the roommates who didn't bathe regularly and left dirty towels lying around in the single bathroom that house had or the one roommate who didn't know how to wash dishes properly. The frustration was unreal. Let's just say I escaped and years later, after a couple of other roommate situations, I thankfully live alone and stress-free!
People told us all about their worst roommates after Redditor Out-of-Simpacks asked the online community,
"What's your roommate horror story?"
"It felt weird wearing them..."
"My first college roommate hated doing laundry.
When he ran out of clean underwear for a date, he'd "borrow" mine (even though I told him to leave my stuff alone).
As I once described, he'd return my underwear unwashed after his dates with all his "smells" (and hers) trapped in the material.
It felt weird wearing them afterward, knowing his junk had been in them."
You should have put some habanero sauce in them. That would have taught him a lesson.
"Luckily another roommate..."
"College roommate put eggs on to boil for lunch, packed for spring break, and then she left. With the eggs still boiling on the stove.
Luckily another roommate came back in between classes and saw it with maybe half an inch of water left in the pan. He didn't normally come home at that time too, so we were really lucky she didn't burn the place down."
I will never understand people who don't mind the stove while cooking something. To not do so is really asking for trouble.
"I had a guy who was a grad student..."
"I had a guy who was a grad student as a roomie for a while. He would come home at 2 am and was just incapable of being quiet. Aside from slamming every door he touched, he would loudly pace up and down in the kitchen while waiting for his whistling kettle to boil. Every. Single. Night. I was so glad when he finished and left.
In contrast, the guy before him was also a grad student, kept similar hours, and was as quiet as a mouse."
Noise would drive me crazy. Thankfully, he's gone!
"She then decided..."
"My first college roommate had pictures of herself taped all over her mirror. That was my first sign. She then decided to wage war on me because she decided, for some random reason, that she didn't like me. I had friends next door and down the hall and we never really hung out with her because she had her own circle of friends. Anyway, this b*tch short-sheeted my bed, spread peanut butter on my sheets, and stole a pair of my shoes. Thank God she left after the first semester."
Sounds like narcissim to a T. You're free now!
"Then she accused me..."
"I had a roommate who liked to have sex with her boyfriend on the kitchen table. There would be condoms draped on top of the full trash can all the time.
Then she accused me of stealing her mushrooms because she forgot that she had taken them the week before.
I kicked her out, and she left the apartment key in a pile of cigarette ashes."
That's just nasty. I will never understand people who live like that.
"One of my old housemates had a bad habit of being drunk and hungry, but not having any snacks around.
His solution would be to cook while wasted. One time he was blacked out while cooking sausage on the stove at 4 am. He got distracted and left the sausage to take a SHOWER. Thankfully one of us was woken up by the smoke before the house burned down. Safe to say that he was not allowed to cook with the stove after a certain hour."
"A roommate who was an aspiring record producer..."
"A roommate who was an aspiring record producer and spent hours every day tweaking the same two songs."
This definitely got old... fast.
"I had a roommate who was frequently drunk..."
"I had a roommate who was frequently drunk and one day I came home to find him burning my clothes in the backyard. I also had to start locking my bedroom door because there were a few occasions where he came in and passed out in my bed even when I told him he wasn't in his room."
"I immediately walked out..."
"I traveled a lot as a college student and I got home after a weekend and my roommates had thrown a party, which was somewhat normal.
I went to my bed and they'd let some chick sleep in it and she peed herself.
I immediately walked out the front door and found an apartment for myself."
Good for you! Living alone was the best decision I ever made. So much relief.
"Time to dust this one off..."
"Time to dust this one off again and dive straight into the PTSD. I had a housemate who, over the span of six months managed the following:
- Encouraged a rodent infestation by leaving food out.
- Dialled the heating to full because she was cold. Whenever anyone turned it back down, she'd just dial it back up. After a week of near constant 40*C heat, I turned the heating off and smashed the thermostat. Our gas bill for that month was £500.
- Left the door unlocked while she went to work, allowing the house to get burgled. Twice.
- Flooded the house with gas by turning on the stove but failing to light it.
- Refused to pay bills because "her husband already paid them for his house". She could not grasp that each property has its own utility bills.
- Started trawling bars and bringing home random weirdos.
- Moved her smack head boyfriend in, who she'd picked up at a bar three days earlier. He started stalking other residents and lurking around the house while carrying a kitchen knife and apologising profusely."
It's a shame that living alone is so expensive and beyond reach for many people out there. (I definitely lucked out, and am thankful each and every day.)
But maybe some of you enjoy communal living! Good for you. That's all I have to say about that.
Have some horror stories of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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Some of the most common forms of misinformation stem from false beliefs that have been passed down. One huge bit of terrible information taught as fact was the traditional food pyramid millennials grew up having drilled into us in school. It's almost like there might be a reason so many 90s kids have struggled with relationships with food.
GabeGecko wanted to thrash through some major misinformation they asked fellow Redditors:
“What is the most largely believed piece of misinformation?"
Teaching incorrect color theory in schools…animation color GIF by Motion AddictsGiphy
“That red yellow and blue are the primary colors for painting. It's actually magenta, yellow, and cyan - those are the real primary colors. Also, the only thing special about primary colors is that they map to the inverse of the colors our eyes see (our eyes actually see red green and blue unless you have another type of color vision).” ebray99
The biggest contributors to the climate crisis isn't you, it's industrial waste and meat production….
“Recycling. Corporations are wasting millions of tons of resources, and severely damaging the environment. Kurzgesact has a really good video on this. But to summarize: corporations have successfully shoved the climate change problem onto consumers.”
“So to elaborate: This problem isn't quite that black-and-white. The amount of waste varies a lot between countries, as well as the providences/states within countries.” Dot957
Zeus just really sucks at apologies.
“Hercules is his Greek name. It actually isn't and I think more and more people are finding out about this now but its actually Heracles/Herakles. He was named as a 'tribute' for Hera because she was upset that Zeus cheated (again).” Akane_Hyuga_2359
Much to the heartache of the horror genre…
“Inverted crosses are satanic. It is actually the St. Peter's Cross. When he was crucified, he requested to be crucified upside down because he didn't feel worth to be crucified the same way as Jesus.” EngineerMinded
You are entitled to your wrong opinion however…
“That all opinions are valid. Everyone may have opinions. Everyone may speak their mind. Everyone should pursue truths and understanding.”
“However, when debating a topic, there's a big difference between somebody who has spent their entire professional career and education on the debate's subject matter versus someone who saw a post on Facebook.” sMc-cMs
Lack of humidity means less insulation so temperatures easily rise and drop dramatically.
“Deserts are hot. Many are, but not necessarily so. The requirement is that they get less than ten inches of precipitation a year. Antarctica is a desert too.” 8dogsinatrechcoat
"She was an elderly woman who suffered from third degree burns…”
“The other day someone corrected me about the McDonalds coffee incident. I firmly believed the lady did it on purpose, but it was clear that it was accidental and McDonalds had spun a story with the media to make it look like it wasnt their fault. Kind of insane how me and most people around me were fooled by that.” Dead-HC-Taco
“She was an elderly woman who suffered from third degree burns on her thighs and vagina and had to be hospitalized. The McDonald's had been warned that their coffee was kept too hot as well, just under boiling. She initially sued them just for medical expenses because when she asked politely they refused.”
“The judge was so incensed by their behavior that he awarded her the big settlement which was so widely mocked. And anti-government regulation/pro-business groups spun it into this testimony to frivolous lawsuits. Really a shocking piece of misinformation.” ofBlufftonTown
Please call emergency services immediately and follow their guidance, not googles…
“EMT here! Boy are there a lot, but the one that comes to mind is that of someone is having a seizure you need to put something in their mouth so they don't swallow their tongue. This is false for a few reasons:
1) It is physically impossible to swallow your tongue. Go ahead and try, it's attached on pretty well.
2) Putting something in a seizure patients mouth will only introduce a choking hazard. Now the patient has two problems.
3) Seizure patients bite and they bite HARD! So if your fingers are in the patient's mouth when that bite happens, your patient will again have two problems and medical staff will have two patients.” puizunman206
The other 90% is just random facts and Tim Gunn quotes…Mrw GIFGiphy
“The whole "we only use 10% of our brains" thing. Nonsense.” JToTheGlock
Although best practice is to leave nature alone your mama was wrong on this one.
“If you touch a baby bird, their mothers will reject them.” SinisterBootySister
Many of these were considered just plain facts back in our day. Brings us back to some of the best advice one can give: “Question everything, then question the answer."
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This article is an ode to the "friend-dump" and the power of growth. Boundaries are awesome, dear readers. Growth and development are awesome.
Some of these friendships, though... not awesome.
They say friendships form for a reason, a season, or a time. If we're lucky, that time gets to be a really long one - but more often than not things are going to go sideways.
Sometimes friendships fizzle out, people drift apart, maybe someone moves or gets a new job... but every now and then there's one defining moment where you look at someone and think "yeah... I'm gonna have to friend-dump you."
Reddit user FeelThePower999 asked:
"What was the moment you looked at your friend and realized they were no longer a friend and you were going to cut ties?"
Sooooo yeah... boundaries. Let's watch people plow right on through them, shall we?
We're Too Old For Shunningrachel mcadams blow kiss GIFGiphy
"She threw a big 30th birthday party for all her friends. She purposefully invited one girl she'd had a falling out with to come two hours later than the party started."
"Before the girl showed up, she told everyone that the girl was a b*tch and we should all shun her. The poor girl came in with a big expensive present, so happy that her & her where mending things, just to be ignored and belittled by over 30 people."
"The girl left crying. I left not long after and ghosted the sh*t out of my ex-friend."
"She was a minor celebrity in my country. I already saw people take a lot of bad behaviour from her before this happened, but this just pushed me over the edge. People get weird around celebrities, no matter how minor." - fluffyfluffycake
Rooting Against MeThe Princess Bride Boo GIF by filmeditorGiphy
"I was waiting for news of a big career opportunity for a few months, and the sound of relief and satisfaction in her voice when I told my friend it fell through made me realize how hard she had been internally rooting against me."
"Feeling jealous of a friend who has a good thing happen is just part of what it means to be human. But, in that moment, the fact that her response didn't seem mixed with any sympathy for my sadness made me look differently at the dynamics of that friendship."
"I think she genuinely liked me, but not being the "star" in our friendship was too much for her."
Different With An AudienceAwkward Dj Pauly D GIF by Jersey Shore Family VacationGiphy
"When they started treating me different around other people."
"Together just the two of us, everything was great. In a crowd I became ignored except for when I was the butt of jokes. I'm not thin skinned, I'm not talking about not being able to take a joke."
"It's more that they act embarrassed to know me or want to distance themselves."
"You feel played, betrayed, let down and over all like a fool. I've come to realize it's 100% the other persons insecurity, though. Hurt people hurt people - and I don't have time for that insecure bull." - slugvegas
How Little InterestGo Away Reaction GIFGiphy
"I tried to talk to a guy who I thought was my friend about something going on between me and my Dad for a few minutes during a drive."
"He flat out silently stared at his phone - until I said something semi related about him. That is when he perked up and started telling me about how much money he'd made recently, and how he got all of this free weed from someone and boy was his life sweet."
"I sorta just 'mhm'ed' my way through it because it was obvious he had been ignoring me, and when he got to the end of his brag session he in all serious told me he was pretty offended at how little interest I showed in what he'd been saying." - CommercializedPan
Losing My Religionmusic video 90s GIFGiphy
"When I told them that I left my high demand religion. They said we no longer had anything in common."
"What?? 30 years of friendship over in 1 conversation?! Plus, I had been out of the religion for years, but they never knew. Our friendship was fine."
"Once official, I was 'no longer trustworthy, sinful and lost.' That was the end for me."
"It's their loss, not mine." - Gotagoodkidney
"This happened to me. My husband and I left Mormonism and our best friends (so close we were like family) ghosted us over it."
"When my husband confronted his friend about it, the guy said a bunch of vicious stuff about us and claimed they'd never really liked us. It broke my f*cking heart."
"That was more than three years ago and I still have dreams where I'm trying to reconcile with them." - Confident_Basket8694
His AlibiSeason 1 Nbc GIF by The Good PlaceGiphy
"We kind of fell out a while ago and haven't spoken much, but today I learned that he seems to have been using me as an alibi to cheat on his wife."
"She texted me about us having drinks the other night & we haven't done anything socially outside of work since before COVID. Without going into detail I'm certain my confused reaction blew up whatever bull he's been telling her."
"I am not in the habit of lying to people & wouldn't cover for someone in this situation unless it involved a psycho abusive spouse, a "we went on one date" stalker - that kind of thing... Even then I'd need some kind of heads up beforehand!"
"So I don't know what he's been trying to pull, but any hope of rekindling any friendship is now 100% gone. I'm not his alibi." - 3dogsinatrenchcoat
The "Backup Wife"Dean Winchester Facepalm GIFGiphy
"I had a close friend from childhood who was very into the traditional lifestyle, with wife, kids, house with a picket fence, part of the PTA and church. Even in high school."
"He would date anyone that would have him, and ignore us until they broke up and he'd come crawling back. We were best of friends so we always were glad to have him back involved in our group. He went to college literally because he was looking for a girl to marry."
"He ended up dropping out after 2 yrs, and getting a job delivering auto parts where he started dating and married his boss's daughter. They popped out 3 kids right in a row, and every time I talked to him things were "great" but he just would stop responding to me more and more often."
"He was 110% devoted to his little family which was great, but he just stopped being my friend. I'd invite him to get together and he would always just say 'oh why don't you come over here, you can see the kids.' "
"That was fine, but his wife and he would just be on me the whole time about how I'm not really an adult because I dont have a family, my job was putting my ability to have kids at risk (firefighter) and that I basically only had value if I was breeding."
"So part of the distancing was me honestly. I didn't like having to put up with that just to see my friend."
"Long story short, his wife cheats on him, they divorced and she's instantly pregnant with another guy's baby. He comes to me broken over this and we get close again. Really close."
"I drove him to therapy, watched his kids while he was laying in bed all day, unable to get up and brought food for his family."
"I opened up about why I felt we drifted apart in the first place. He actually apologized and admitted he suspected that was why. I thought I had my best friend again."
"Until he met another girl and I started seeing less of him."
"He started flaking on me to hang out. When I did come over, the remarks about 'doing the adult thing' would come out again. His new girlfriend had 3 kids too, so he started joking about being the Brady Bunch."
"I hung on trying to keep the friendship together because I felt bad for not trying enough last time, but he was sliding back into the old him. I was sitting looking at a text he sent after ignoring me for a week that said 'lol, yes, well maybe you'll find a good woman like I did and finally grow up' "
"I suddenly realized I was the only one trying to be a friend, and I just didn't give a sh*T anymore. I deleted his number and haven't heard from him in 2 years. Last thing I heard from him was that text."
"I realized he didn't want to be my friend so much as I was his 'backup wife.' I was easy to fall back on when he found himself single, that's it."
"I'm thinking he may reach out again when he finds himself single again. I won't be there to answer." - The_Great_Blumpkin
Childhood BeautyToddlers And Tiaras Beauty GIFGiphy
"Friend invited me to see her 4 yo daughter perform in a beauty pageant. Ugh, I know, but whatever I wanted to support the kid."
"The little girl sang a sob song about some kid praying to Jesus about their dead mommy. My friend whispered to me that the song 'always won brownie points with the judges'. Again, ugh."
"After the girl performed she came to stand by us in the audience and my friend SMACKED the child's tummy and scolded 'suck it in, no one likes a fat kid.' "
"Yep, I was DONE. I walked out." - noseymimi
Sounded Like An IncelCuff Him Season 2 GIF by American GodsGiphy
"He started saying some pretty gross stuff about this girl who was his friend. She wasn't interested in anything more than friendship and he was pissed about it."
"I told him he sounded like an incel. That's when I started pulling away."
"The last time I saw him was after he got out of prison on bail and wanted to discuss why he was in there and why it was pretty definite he was going back after his trial." - ultravioletblueberry
Google CalendarInterested Kim Kardashian GIFGiphy
"A former friend was going through a divorce that she had instigated by cheating on her ex. She was very, very upset that most people in her circle had sided with her ex."
"I did not pick a side, in part because I was very aware of the sad state of their relationship when she decided to end it. However, she began demanding that I pick a side."
"That led to a slow cooling in our friendship, which blew up one day when I met up with the ex for a beer. Right before we met up, the former friend started frantically texting, wanting to meet up."
"Turned out she had access to my Google Calendar and was following my motions through there."
"She was pissed that I met up with her ex (who was also a friend) and tried to sabotage it. After that I decided I was done with her."
"Too weird, too creepy and controlling. Still friends with the ex, though." - bonbonnibles
Now that we've read Reddits stories, it's your turn. Tell us about the times you knew a friendship had run it's course. I can't wait to read these comments...
Society places a lot of expectations on us based on our perceived gender, and those expectations can be a major burden. Guys who like pink or want to be nurturing fathers, women who like sports, gaming, or working out, all are often ridiculed or deemed suspicious by society. Nonbinary folks are often not acknowledged at all, and are expected to rigidly adhere to the role predetermined by their sex assigned at birth.
Reddit user Zealousideal-Way3105 asked:
Kids Are Great
Showing enthusiasm towards random children.
Why do I have to pretend like they don't exist?
I had a daycare when my kids were growing up so they were used to giving littles attention. Later my son worked in a grocery store and realized that parents get offended if a man shows a reaction to their cute little kid. Even if that kid is waving at him, he waves back and mama bear gets angry. So dumb. He's not gonna jump in the cart with your kid. Geez
Ironically, being a woman that doesn't really enjoy being around kids and doesn't want them myself, I wish it was normalized for me to not show enthusiasm towards kids.
Anyone Can Struggle With Mental Illness
Mental illness, but that should be for everyone. Being a 6'5 250 pound dude with anxiety? Yeah I don't get taken serious in the slightest bit.
Unfortunately I think women aren't taken seriously either. It's just society deems women to be "weaker" and this falls in line with societal expectations/perceptions as "fragile" beings. There is hardly true support or understanding.
I feel you. I'm a 6'6" 280 lb man who's dealt with depression and anxiety since my early teens. Despite having what should have been very obvious symptoms that were readily visible to my parents, teachers, and school counselor, I didn't get any help as a kid. And having that attitude projected towards me made it take me a long time to realize that it was okay for me to get myself help as an adult.
Tradespeople Can Be Any Gender
I really wish women were more common in the trades.
Additionally, it shouldn’t be shocking when a woman knows how to use power tools or understands how a house is put together. It’s a valuable life skill.
Agreed. My mom is the handy one of the house and she’s teaching me. I think it’s vital for all genders to learn all aspects of running a home (cooking, using tools, cleaning properly) because it’s all equally important and it’s stupid that you’re supposed to be exempt from half of it if you’re a certain gender smh
It Doesn't Matter What Time Of The Month It Is
Having a bad day because you're having a bad day, not because you have PMS
Or when you aren't feeling good people's first question is if you're pregnant
"I said I have a sinus infection, Cathy, not a baby infection."
Nobody Has To Wear Makeup
Not wearing makeup or having to look pretty all the time.
I would settle with just not being asked if I'm sick if I go without.
On the flip side I wish I could conceal my adult acne without being judged for makeup… lol
Pink Is For Everyone
Not for me but my son. He loves pink. He's always been drawn to it. He picked out a pair of pink glasses at the eye doctor and I immediately said yes because he loved them. I'm so afraid he is going to get bullied but he is so proud of his new glasses. He wanted his hair pink this summer and I let him do it. Why can't little boys like pink too? He also loves monster trucks and dinosaurs. We live in the American south in a small town so you can probably imagine what the people in this town are like.
Being a stay at home dad. Mom does it and she's a hero. Dad does it and he's a failure. It's not cool.
Have a friend that is a SAHD. It has been a struggle for him over the years. Between the lack of support structures online (ie: good online communities for talking about different things or venting stress/concerns) and just how family and in-laws act about it.
He at least hasn't had to deal with societal issues at large for a number of reasons. One of the things that triggered the f**k out of him though was when he went in with his kid for regular checkups, the doctors/nurses would ask his wife questions about the kid even though the staff knows he is the main care taker. At one point his wife had to snap at the staff and tell them they need to ask him those questions because he knows more.
For as progressive as the West has moved in some ways on these kinds of things, it's still stuck in certain mindsets.
I'm a woman who is into watching certain sports. Some guys don't think that's normal.
So many guys have to quiz me on my fandom. It's crazy. They don't do that to their guy friends.
Oh boy, as a woman who's been playing video games and reading comics for over 20 years...I know all about the quizzing.
Boys Like Flowers Too
Getting flowers. Ain't no one ever get flowers for men. Flowers are great.
Told my partner I think it's bullsh*t that men don't get flowers and the next day she surprised me with a bunch of chrysanthemums. Needless to say I was over the moon.
Kitties For Everybody!
Being cat dad. I mean seriously, what is weird about a guy having a cat?
Years ago my roommate and I were picking up a cat from a farm, and they legit asked ‘what do 2 guys want with a cat anyways’ same thing as everyone else.
Arbitrary gender-based societal expectations hurt everybody. It doesn't hurt anyone for folks to have a mixture of likes and dislikes that are considered mascilune or feminine.