The Absolute Best Responses To 'Mom And Dad, I Think I'm Gay'

Person wearing a Pride Equality cap
Elyssa Fahndrich/Unsplash

For closeted individuals, coming out is a rite of passage in life that LGBTQ+ people never signed up for.

Why is it that anyone who inherently identifies a certain way has to explain themselves to those who are confused and unwavering in their socialized ignorance?

Times have changed and while there have been advances made for LGBTQ+ people to find more acceptance and feel less like an "other," there are still many challenges to overcome.

Even with gay role models prevalent in pop culture, it can still be difficult for gay youth today to come out to a parent who chooses to live in the past and align themselves to antiquated ideals in society that prevents them from loving their child as they are.

But sometimes, the response after opening up to a parent in a vulnerable moment can prove that unconditional love is the best thing in the entire world.


Curious to hear about positive responses, Redditor Expert_Recover3061 asked:

"What's the best response to 'Dad, I think I'm gay'?"

Even those who aren't fathers can give the best response.

Crisis Averted

"In the 90s, when my girlfriend finally told her traditional Italian mom and grandma at 19, they sighed in unison and grandma said, 'oh thank baby Jesus, I was worried that I was going to have to tell you.'"

– DifficultAccident9

What Gran Said

“'I thought you were about to give me bad news! Don’t scare me like that!' - My granny when my uncle came out (in the ‘70’s!). She was decades ahead of her time…"

– LongjumpingCake1924

They're still parents.

The Rules Don't Change

"You still have to wear a condom."

– Ginchy1971

Not The Only Outcome

"Pregnancy isn't the only STD."

– rhymes_with_snoop

Bracing For The Worst

"This was my literal response when my brother came out to me. He’d called me and said he had something urgent to tell me and it had to be face to face. I was a bus journey away and started to panic so I made him tell me over the phone."

“'I’m gay.' 'I know that! I thought someone had DIED.'"

– Suspicious-Brain-521

Protective Dad

"When I came out to my dad when I was 16 I thought he would disown me. He said: 'Son, If anyone ever hurts you for that, I’ll f'king kill them'. In that moment I realized that I had the best dad in the world."

– Winterpegs

These reactions raised eyebrows.

Cryptic

“'So that’s why you don’t like mushrooms'. At least that’s what my friends dad said to him when he came out. We still don’t know what he meant by that."

– narnababy

"One of my friends from high school was gay, and when he came out to his family his Dad literally didn’t look up from his newspaper & told him his sister didn’t need to tell him she was straight so why would he need to explain that he was gay? He’s known him his whole life and already knew that."

"It was cute because he was so worried."

– 0Diamond0

These Redditors realized they had nothing to fear.

Cheers To That

"Well... My dad said 'I know... And I don't care. As long as you are happy, I'm also happy for you.' And then asked me if I wanted a beer or scotch to celebrate that I finally had the confidence to tell him."

– OneMorePotion

The Best Parents

"Our son came out to us a month ago. We already suspected, so it wasn't a shock."

"When he told me I thanked him for telling me, told him that I loved him, then explained that who he wants to tell next and how he wants to tell them is 100% his choice and we will support him however he wants and needs. He gave us a list of people to tell, and by the end of the week he wanted everyone to know."

"Love and acknowledgement and support."

– Feetyoumeet

Most parents these days aren't given enough credit for being understanding–and also having good instincts about their closeted children–as the fear of being disowned weighs heavily on the mind of individuals who are apprehensive about coming out.

A friend of mine told me her 19-year-old son came out to her and her husband. They already suspected and were waiting on him to come out on his terms when he was ready.

Her husband had the best response.

He said:

"Son, I just hope I get to have the first dance with you at the wedding."

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