Humans can be amazing! We are capable of more than we think we are.
But we tend to spend most of our lives in self doubt; until certain moments roll around and we are suddenly vindicated to ourselves.
You hear the stories all the time of mothers lifting cars off of their children, or fighting off vandals with a single punch. Anything is possible, if we try hard enough.
That's why we need to take our moments to relish in the "Damn! I'm good!" We are!
Redditor u/pikachu2_opwanted to hear about the times people surprised themselves by asking:
What's your "damn I'm a bad@ss" moment?
I often find myself surprised by... me. And after each and every time I deem myself worthy again I immediately fall back into self doubt. It's my life cycle. I could cure cancer and I'd still be like "meh." I need to start recording my "greatness" moments.
Savior
Choking Sign Language GIF by Sign with RobertGiphy"I saved my husband's life using the Heimlich maneuver, on the first try, never having done it before."
Ramped Up
"Not as cool as some of the others here, but I was running through a building, down a ramp with polished cement floors, and I somehow ended up falling down on one knee. With my high momentum I managed to slide all the way down the ramp (it was very long) and then kick myself back up into running again. It all happened completely smoothly and it felt like an action scene."
In Kauai...
"I went on a snorkeling trip off the coast of Kauai. There was a newlywed couple there that I could tell weren't good in the water. We're out in the water and they're off by themselves and I can see that the wife is crying and the husband has a panicked look on his face. Turns out they didn't realize that skin contracts in water and he lost his wedding ring off his finger. I scan around for a while and find it 30 feet down or so. I run down and get it and give it back to them. They were thrilled."
The Champion Chucker!
"Chucked a piece of cardboard at a recycling bin at work, it was about 30 feet from me. A draft caught it and took it 40 feet up and it did a double loop before slamming directly into the bin. One old lady saw and went "wooow!" Felt like a freaking champion all day."
Leaks
shower GIFGiphy"I just relocated and extended the outdoor water tap for my 70 year old widowed neighbor, and when I turned the water back on nothing leaked. Felt kind bada**."
See there, now that is cool realness being served. We need to appreciate our own actions, big or small. That feeling of bada**ery is like none other. Why not try to emulate it instead of taking a pill to fake it?
Back Up
fun video GIFGiphy"I went to a shop to buy a new bike... and I went there on my old bike. I came back home riding my new bike and by holding the old one with one hand."
"Everything was going fine, until the bikes abruptly turned sideway and sent me flying over the handle bars. I ducked forward, landed on my shoulder and in a continuous roll, I got back on my feet and did a thumb up to appease a startled passer by."
Survivor
"I didn't think how cool/good it was at the moment, but when I was like 5 or 6, a woman covered in blood crawled to my childhood house door and started banging on it, I woke up from the noise and went to open it. When I opened it, I just saw her in cuts, scratches, bruises, etc... Apparently her boyfriend was trying to actually kill her and she managed to escape."
"She asked to be let in for safety and I let her in and went to go wake up my mom. When she came out she was shocked to see her and went to clean her wounds a bit and later called the police and ambulance, I didn't fix her wounds or anything but I'd like to think that I saved her life that day."
Lockdown
"Start of UK lockdown my dishwasher broke down and since shops were closed, I was looking at minimum three months of doing the dishes by hand. Forget that. Went to YouTube, watched a bunch of videos, took the pump apart and found a piece of broken glass which was messing it up. Put it back together, worked perfect, forget you entropy and washing dishes."
Things That Are Normal Where You Live But Crazy Anywhere Else | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
In Yellowstone...
"I got lost alone in Yellowstone, after sunset. But I'd come prepared with a headlamp, kept my cool & found my way back to my car alive. My detour added several miles to the route, and it was & still is the most I've hiked in a single day, probably just under 14 miles."
"I could barely move when I got back to my car. I had to just sit for about 20 minutes before I was able to drive. But I got the most amazing view of the Milky Way of my entire life along the way. Totally worth it for that alone. Any mishap you survive becomes an adventure."
A New Shape
Working Out Richard Simmons GIFGiphy"Obese most of my life. Worked really hard, lost 100lbs. Took up running, and decided to run a marathon."
"I've never felt more like a bada** than when I crossed that finish line. The training and the race itself were the hardest things I've done in my life, and there were many times throughout where I really wasn't sure I was going to make it."
"Crap. That guy is an IDIOT!"
"I share mine with my dog. Did the adrenaline pumping, car lift thing. My idiot neighbor was trying to change his own oil, and didn't have the jack in the proper place. Whatever metal it was on, bent, and the car lowered onto him. Him which had his body positioned perfectly so the front tire would crush his dumb butt."
"My dog was out back and started going insane barking, so I bolted outside, wondering what could be wrong (he only barks when something's wrong, like my kid left the yard or something) I see my neighbor's legs sticking out from his freaking tire, race inside screaming for my brother, then bolt back out and try to lift the car. My brother comes out and as I somehow manage to lift the car just enough, he pulls the neighbor out. I was expecting him to be dead, but he stood up, coughed a few times, and said thanks."
"We called EMS to get him checked and they took him to the hospital. He had some internal injuries, but survived and recovered fully. What I remember most is flopping to my butt in the driveway, thinking, "Crap. That guy is an IDIOT!" It was my brother that said I'm a bada**. And as the real hero, yes, doggo got all the pats and scratches and treats."
"I was at a party and apparently some guy had a problem with me (I didn't even know him). I was sitting with friends and from across the room he yelled something to me, but with the music I couldn't hear what he was saying. So I said "What??" And he yelled it again. But again, I couldn't hear him."
"So I stood up and said (more forcefully) "WHAT?!" His face dropped, he shrunk back a little, said "never mind" and sat down. My friends laughed their BUTTS off. I genuinely thought this dude had a question. But I had inadvertently backed him down. My bad@ss moment was an accident."
High Five
High Five Teamwork GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy"When I was like 9 years old, I choke-slammed the neighborhood bully, full WWE style."
"It was directly under a streetlight, and there were people all around to witness it, because I think someone was having a party. I ran away because I thought I would get in trouble, but the adults (actually teenagers, but being 9 I thought of them as "adults") just wanted to give me high-fives. And don't worry, the kid was totally fine other than being shaken up."
The Perseverance Award
"I signed up for an archery merit badge at my boy scout camp a few years back and I sucked terribly at if with the lowest average for the whole damn week, but toward the end of the trip I crunched it and spent my entire free day with the bow at the archery area and sank them center left and right. When it came time to announce awards at the end of the week, the counsellor in charge of the range stepped up in front of the bonfire and gave a speech about the scouts he worked with that week."
"He gets through most of the names and I'm feeling pretty down on myself because I figured I was overlooked but I can still recall what he said."
"...And the last award is something very special, the camp barely hands it out because only a few kids here are cut from this cloth. The Perseverance award goes to a scout I watched tirelessly fire down the range until his hands were red and covered in blisters. He started off with the lowest average of this summers group, but ended with the highest I've seen while working in the ranger. The award goes to (my name), congratulations, you earned it."
"I was beaming for like 4 months after hearing it."
- Hazeunix
Middle School Days
"Middle School. I stood after school to play basketball with some other kids. I was just sitting on a bench taking a break when a younger kid — I think it was one of the other kid's little brother — comes up to me and tries to start something for no reason. Little kid throws a punch at my face, and without missing a beat, I move my arm from resting on the table to catching his fist inches away from my face."
"Idon't say a word and I just let the kid think about what just happened. It takes him a moment to process and then he just walks away like nothing happened. Felt really cool in the moment but none of the other kids saw it."
- Dijirii
Save the Girl
"Leaving work at a big box store a little after 1am and I'm next to my car in the parking lot and changing out of my work shirt into a t-shirt. There's a couple benches outside a few random people around. I see a car swerve toward one woman and then brake hard and knowing a couple people out there I figured it was just a very bad joke."
"But then I see the car lurch forward and brake hard again and can see a woman in the headlights with a terrified look on her face so I start running as fast as I can toward them. A ridiculously muscled guy gets out of the car and starts moving toward her. I wasn't the first person there."
"The first was a 14-year old kid who was very short and skinny. The kid shoves the guy and then the guy knocks him down and gets right on top of him. The guy hits him three times before I get there and hit him in the back of the head. This dude was hella drunk and got off the kid to take a couple swings at me that I was able to avoid."
"One of the others in the crowd yells that the cops have been called and he books it out of there. Thankfully the cops got him before any more damage happened. He pled guilty and went to jail for a bunch of charges. I don't think I was the most bad@ss because the kid took those hits like a champ and saved the girl, but I still felt pretty awesome."
A Critical 2 Minutes...
"Possibly saving a life. I saw a motorcycle crash in a parking lot late at night. No one but me went to check on the guy, everyone else was just standing around looking. Dude had a compound fracture on his leg and blood was pouring through his jeans onto the ground. I used my belt to tourniquet the leg. The ambulance didn't arrive for another 2 minutes so I might have saved him from bleeding out."
"I can do this, I was in the girl guides."
amazon fly GIFGiphy"Once, at a party, a friend of mine got trapped in the bathroom accidentally when the doorknob fell off."
"Despite being plastered, I got her out with a pair of scissors. The quote, still remembered a decade later among our friends was "I can do this, I was in the girl guides." Took perhaps five minutes."
I Am Woman!
water bottle woman GIFGiphy"I'm a relatively petite woman and I changed my flat tire without any help in a snowstorm. It was a struggle, and my hands were scraped and bleeding by the end, but I felt really proud of myself."
Bravo and Cheers to all! None of that was easy to pull off, and more times than not it's even more difficult to share. Go forth y'all and lean into your inner BADA**!! Let the inspiration lead you.
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"After a recent study found 1 in 8 men under 35 admit to taking condoms to funerals "just in case", what's your experience with this?"
Select Crowd...
"I went to my grandma's funeral and hit it off with this hot nurse."
"Things were going great until my brother pulled me aside and said it was my second cousin."
'You know who shows up at funerals for old people? "
"Family members."- bumblef**kglobal
"I remember seeing a really hot chick at my grandmother's funeral."
"Immediately thought was I should chat her up."
"Then my brain went to, 'What if she's family and we just never met?'"
"I just went back to mourning."- VideoGameDana
Okay then...
"Once I was dating a girl whose dad absolutely forbid us from dating."
"Like, would lock his daughter in her room and take her phone to make sure we did not communicate."
"She told me when we spoke for a moment at Starbucks that she would date me if her dad was out of the picture."
"He died is a car crash on the freeway, and since her mom liked me invited me to the funeral."
"My girl and I sat next to each other at the funeral and couldn't wait, got it on in the parking lot of the funeral home."
"Condom was necessary."- crunchysquare
car studio GIF by ZI ItalyGiphyNever The Funeral, Always The Wake
"Ngl, some of the best parties I’ve been to have been wakes."
"In no way disrespectful, they were a celebration of the person’s life and also a massive tension release after grimness of the funeral itself."
"So I’m not surprised some people take a condom just in case."
"I’ve never done it, but I didn’t often expect to get laid regardless of situation."- Goryokaku
Oops...
"Proudly in the 7 out of 8 camp."
"But the 1 in 8 aren’t wrong."
"Heard through the family grapevine that one of my female cousins met a dude at a funeral and they banged it out the same night."
"Also turns out they were related (what’re the odds at the funeral of a relative? )."
"Distant enough they would never see each other again (different branches of her family), close enough that their family photo albums have overlapping people."- ESQBOJaguar
If You Really Think About It...
"Biologically speaking mourning/death triggers mating instincts as though that death tells the lizard brain in us that we need to procreate because death is scary."
"Scum'ically speaking, funerals typically leave people especially women in a state of fragility that leaves them vulnerable to suggestion and coercion."
"Socially speaking, some people, both men and women, seek comfort and company after/during a mourning period and when two people engage in comforting each other emotionally through a death it can trigger chemicals in the brain that cause the idea of connection or chemistry which can inevitably lead to copulation."- KURO-K1SH1
Season 18 Episode 3 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphyBetter Safe Than Sorry!
"If you forget to bring a condom you increase the chance of casual sex with 10.000%."
"It’s a well-known fact."- Mukkeman
Not Just Men...
"I'm not a man and I've taken condoms 'just in case' pretty much anywhere."
"I've told folks to take condoms 'just in case' to a festival who I was sure would never have a one night stand and who I had never even seen mingle with any man/woman."
"It's a safety."
"The thing costs less than a dollar, but if anything somehow would happen, not having it could cost you your healthiness or independence/freedom due to a child being your new responsibility."
"Unless you absolutely, 100% am sure you will not be having sex that day, and no one will be able to change your mind - carry a condom."
"And having visited a funeral is likely not impactful enough to everyone to make them absolutely sure of that."-deterministic_lynx
It Is, Indeed, A Source Of Comfort...
"I'm a woman, but I'm going to point out that grief affects everyone differently."
"Some people get an intense need for sex when they are grieving, I speak from experience here."
"Perhaps they're carrying them everywhere already, but choosing to take some specifically to a funeral makes perfect sense to me."- Sexy-Snowflake
"My bf's son died, and his sex drive was significantly higher around that time period, I think it's just a way men deal with stress."- Arielxxxlee
Sexy Ava Gardner GIF by Turner Classic MoviesAlways Listen To Your Mother...
"When I turned 15 my mom told me to always have a condom in my wallet just in case."
"That was before people realized it was really bad to keep it in your wallet."
"So yeah I’ve been pretty much everywhere with one 'just in case'."- euphoria110
If It's Already There, Why Take It Out?
"I do too."
"I'm not going to remove the random condom that is in my wallet just because I'm going to a funeral."
"Not that I ever needed one, I'm still a virgin BTW."- azarbi
When One Life Ends, Another Begins...
"I’ve heard that the proximity of death increases the desire to make new life."
"Anecdotally, my FIL and MIL met at a funeral and 9 months later my husband was born."- KerouacsGirlfriend
Lionel Messi Hug GIF by FC BarcelonaGiphyNot SPECIFICALLY Funerals...
"We bring condoms everywhere, 'just in case', not only the funeral, you silly!"- WeetIkVeelNL
No one should be judged if they happen to have a condom with them when attending a funeral.
After all, should the moment arise, better to be prepared and safe.
On the other hand, if any of these people are attending the funeral with the intention of "getting lucky", that's just... yeah...
Redditor Spinksy48 wanted to understand the fun of letting your opponent lose by just doing nothing, so they asked:
"What is your 'never interrupt an enemy while they are making a mistake' moment?"
If the story starts to get really crazy, just wait for a break.
Then ask a question from the beginning.
I guarantee you know more of the lie than they do.
Just keep talking, friend.
Gotcha
Dashcam Hello GIF by TranscendGiphy"I let the lady who changed lanes into me run her mouth about how I rear-ended her before pulling the cop aside to show him my DashCam footage."
ThrowingChicken
A Cherry Wave
"I was accused by a neighbor of reversing out of my drive and hitting his car. He gave me the date and time I had allegedly done it and pointed to a (small) scrape on my car that supposedly matched perfectly the location of the dent on his. This was 7 weeks after the alleged event, by the way."
"I said it wasn't me but told him to contact his insurance and we'd see what they said. A few weeks later I get a letter from my insurance asking what had happened, to which I responded with the date I had bought my car (and updated my insurance) - two weeks after the supposed bump."
"He never spoke to me again but I used to give him a cheery wave every time I saw him glowering at his window."
Gazcobain
Speak Once
"In a meeting with my project manager who has not been in the office or worked a proper full day for MONTHS, she has increasingly been annoyed by people bypassing her to get things done by telling me and her other direct reports what to do."
"I was about to answer a question for stakeholders, and she told me to let her speak one sentence and will let me have my bit. I did as I was told, and she told the stakeholder a completely wrong thing about the system we were handling and made a complete fool out of herself. She got sacked this month."
choiaera
We Hated Each Other
"Guy stole a presentation from me, this is 25 years ago. We hated each other. When he started presenting I realized I had made a huge error, didn’t say anything. Let him get through it. Asked him about the error, but he couldn’t answer. This was in front of COO. Got fired, not for just that, he was an overall douche. This was before everyone was on PCs, and had one printer in one room."
Bmilvis
Whoops
Office Space GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy"When a coworker who I hated got fired a few weeks after I decided to stop fixing his mistakes even if it impacted a client."
Hrekires
It's always thrilling to see the bad colleagues go!
Bye. Bye. Bye.
I will see you on the 15th
Idiot Reaction GIFGiphy"Not my story, but several years ago my older brother was fighting for custody of his son with his ex-wife. As the first custody hearing date approached, they were exchanging [un]pleasantries over text and my brother ended up saying something along the lines of, 'I'm not continuing this conversation. I will see you on the 15th.' The ex-wife told him, 'The hearing is on the 25th dumba**.'"
"So of course instead of correcting her, my brother just allowed her to keep thinking it was the wrong date, and she missed the first hearing entirely. It became the first of many mistakes she made in the court system that eventually led to my brother and the woman who is now his second wife winning full custody of his son."
Damn_Furries
Follow the Prints
"I'm working on a job site and the architect is there one day. I've been given some light fixtures for the sconces in a leasing office lobby. The fixtures are meant to be hung from a ceiling, they can't be installed on a wall. I attempt to convey this to the architect, but he brushes me off and just tells me to follow the prints."
"I turn to the apprentice and say, well you heard the man, put them up. A bit later, we hear the crashing of glass. The architect asks what was that? I said your light fixture. As I picked up a broom and dustpan to go clean up."
Ohhhhhhthehumanity
No Debt
"As I was being fired from a job, the district manager requested we record the conversation. He thought I was gonna be very upset, so I obliged. Then when he started to tell me why I was being fired he started with, 'You are gonna be graduating college soon, and we want to make sure we get ahead of you leaving us.'"
"I very calmly asked him to send me the recording right after he said that. Then later that day I called a lawyer. I now have no student loan debt."
JRTHEAMAZING
The Screams
"I reminded my ex-wife the divorce court was the next day and was invited to Get F**ked. So I went by myself, she failed to appear and pissed off the Judge so he asked what would be my desired outcome for assets and Custody of the kids. He wrote down whatever I wanted and I could hear her screams when she read the Orders from 3500km away."
comfortablynumb15
Silence
"There's a thing in law enforcement/legalese called a spontaneous utterance. Many many people will bury their own cases with these while bi*ching and moaning at their arresting officer on the way to jail."
raccoonsonbicycles
That last one is good knowledge to have in the back pocket.