Common Behaviors That Most People Find Normal But Some Consider Horribly Rude
While people try their best to be pleasant, sometimes we are so wrapped up in our own worlds that we don't realize some of our behaviors or actions aren't appreciated by everyone.
Things like talking on the phone in a public place or listening to music without headphones have become so normal that people don't always realize others may be irritated by this behavior.
There any many things that some people consider normal that others think are rude.
Curious to know what some of those things are, Redditor dentistani asked:
"What is something people find normal, but you find horribly rude?"
What Happened To Private Conversations?
"Face timing in public. Not everyone wants to be a part of your personal life or conversation."
– Fuzzy_Principle8075
"Talking on speaker phone in public. The number of people I see holding their phone out in front of their face while they yell into it is annoying."
– mattwb72
Don't Answer The Question
"When someone talks to you or asks you a question, then when I respond with a meaningful answer, the other person just talks about something else to someone else or just doesn't respond."
– aboxatar15
"My MIL does this. Whenever we visit, she'll ask me a question about work/my side of the family/a hobby I have/whatever as a platitude, and a lot of times before I'm even done answering, she'll be like, "Oh, hey, [my nephew], tell them about your baseball game last weekend.""
– Infinite-Weakness584
May We Meet Again
"Depending on culture, people will propose to meet up again but they do not really mean it. Where I am from, if you tell someone you want to meet up again you actually mean it. I learned it the hard way when I took people for their word and tried to arrange a meet up but they'd ignore me."
"They say they do this to be polite but I consider it more rude. Just say ''goodbye''"
– maya_clara
I'm Not Here
"People just showing up for a ‘surprise visit’, like I love my family and friends but sometimes I just don’t want to hang out and a bit of forewarning would be nice"
– red-and-misdreavus
"I've had to set boundaries with my mother as she was doing the "We're coming down and going to stay with you thing." Like could you ask?! Besides she's exhausting and never stops talking and needing attention."
– Fuzzyphilosopher
"If someone shows up unannounced at my door I just don’t answer. F*ck em"
– 360SubSeven
Text Me Back!
"Expecting me to be within reach at all times. Just because I have a phone does't mean I hate you because I leave it in the other room sometimes, or go on a walk without it. I'm not dead if I take a couple of hours to get back to you."
– billbaparker
"There’s a special place in hell for people who keep messaging you trying to get your attention simply because they want it and not because they have anything important to say."
– murderymcmurderface
Can't Hear Myself Think
"Kids watching videos or playing games with volume on. Sorry I was trying to enjoy my own thoughts."
– TheConstant815
"Listening to anything on your phone without headphones/earbuds while around other people. Don't care if it's radio, music, social media. Worse if other people are trying to have a conversation."
– Daedalus332
Personal Space, Please
"When clients stand directly behind me, looking over my shoulder at my computer screen while I'm at work. 1) Back up, I don't want you standing close to me. 2) I did not invite you to look at my screen, and it is intrusive and it is uncomfortable to have you watch me work."
– madindenial
Far Too Personal
"Asking married or older people why they don’t have kids."
– DragonFlyMeToTheMoon
Focus!
"Having your phone out while socializing. I’ve stopped hanging out with people who can’t put their phone away while having a conversation, it’s so rude."
– bamblb
"There was a guy I was seeing for a couple months and when I would message him he would take HOURS to respond most of the time. But then when we would be out together at dinner he would be messaging on his phone right in front of me, replying to his mates group chat. Really showed his priorities."
– MissMidknight
Someone's Not Listening
"Talking over somebody whilst they’re already talking."
"Everybody does it and it’s so ignorant! It’s as if they’re saying “yeah I’m not interested in what you’ve got to say, Me, me, me and me…etc…”"
– Jlaw118
"My husband does this! Sometimes I just stop talking. If I’m irritated, I’ll say, “Sorry, did my talking get in the way of your interrupting?”"
– godrainlovemusic
Going, Going, Gone
"Ghosting has become pretty normal and I hate it"
– toxicrith01
"I'll never understand why this has been normalized"
"What confuses me even more is why people get so defensive when you say that it's a cruel thing to do to someone."
– RadiantHC
Ask Me First
"Filming people without their permission, especially if they are dancing or singing. Just because people are looking silly doesn’t mean you get to make them your joke."
– Soobobaloula
"pushing someones face into a cake on their special day, that is terribly rude. Not funny or cool."
– winkledorf
"Dangerous too - fancy cakes with multiple layers can be held together by wooden skewers. People have literally lost eyeballs that way."
– merecat6
"Just this past summer, I attended a wedding where the bride gently put a bite of cake on a fork after they had cut it together then fed it to her husband... Even cupping her hand underneath so no crumbs or icing could fall on his suit. And instead of doing the same to her, the groom full on chased his bride down to smash cake in her face super hard and throw it all over her while she was being dead serious trying to run away saying "no. please don't!" . And while everyone laughed like hyenas and cheered him on like it was just fine. One big joke."
"She looked so heartbroken after with cake all over her hair (which looked beautiful), her face (with perfect make up) and her dress (which was a unique style of dress that she had sewn a piece of one her father's shirts on since he had passed. So her dress was obviously something that she put a lot of thought and care into). He then proceeded to chastise her after she was upset in front of us, threw back his champagne in one gulp and then went back to the bar then dance floor."
"She spent the next 45 mins trying to fix herself. F*ck that guy forever. She's a distant cousin and although we aren't super close, I have ALWAYS known her to be a perfectly sweet, kind and loveable person so I couldn't believe she was with this jerk! I hope it's gotten better but.. My hopes aren't high for her. I wish I had felt comfortable enough to approach her and tell her she deserved better. I should have anyway."
– iwant_torebuild
Mind Your Own Business!
"When someone you don't know very well asks you personal questions."
– Back2Bach
"Add to that, someone asks you personal questions you don't know too well and feigns that are suddenly really concerned/ supportive of your struggles. Like I didn't want to be vulnerable in the first place with you and now I feel like I have to be appreciative for your fake a*s empathy."
– GreenIce2022
I 100% agree with that last one!
Do you have anything you'd like to add? Let us know in the comments below.
Real-Life Examples Of People Sabotaging Their Own Happiness
Reddit user _lilyara asked: 'What's the best real life example, you've witnessed, of someone destroying their own happiness?'
So it's not surprising then that many people have sabotaged their situations for something better and realized after the fact that they ruined a good thing.
Curious to hear from regretful strangers online, Redditor _lilyara asked:
"What's the best real-life example, you've witnessed, of someone destroying their own happiness?
People do crazy things for love.
End Of A Marriage
"Young guy at work; he's in his early to mid 20's, is married with two young kids and a third on the way. This new girl at work has been after him so hard. He was seriously tempted and conflicted. We all tried to talk him out of it; did he really want to throw away his family life for this? Do you really think this new girl is going to stick around once all the drama starts when you guys get caught?"
"He told us all one day that he finally told new girl to leave him alone; he was happy with his wife, and she didn't stand a chance."
"Three weeks later, he was sleeping in his car because he went for new girl after all; got caught, kicked out & served with divorce papers, and new girl ditched him once he got depressed over it."
– ZormkidFrobozz
Skewed Priorities
"A friend of mine quit a job that paid six figures a year because he didn't trust his girlfriend to not cheat on him while he was at work. The kicker here being she was a sex worker when they met."
"He's a great guy but a complete idiot when it comes to women."
– gimpisgawd
Some people go looking for love in all the wrong places.
Chasing Duds
"I have an insecure cousin who would regularly reject guys who were into her and chase guys who weren't interested."
"The more distant and emotionally unavailable the guy was the harder she'd try to win him over."
"The best real life example of 'I don't want to be a part of any club that would have me as a member' I've ever seen."
– _eviehalboro
Divorced And Lonely
"I know a guy who is now in his fifties/sixties who got bored with his wife and kids, cheated on her and divorced her. His wife, who had always supported him because he just couldn’t hold a job down, started a business and became a multimillionaire. She also got remarried to this amazing guy who is a major step up from the husband in every aspect."
"The guy then married this mail-order bride from Indonesia. As soon as the three years she had to stay with him to get permanent residency were over, she left him and married his richer cousin. I sometimes get invited to family events and see him there by himself, broke and with none of his kids or family members wanting to talk to him."
– blue_tongued_skink
Impaired Judgement
"My dad threw out a 15-year marriage with a woman he adored because he got drunk and screwed a random coworker."
"He’s utterly miserable now."
– illustriousocelot_
Bad vices can take over people's lives and realize until too late.
Expensive Addiction
"I know a guy who gambled away $8 million his grandfather left him. He inherited at 21. It was gone by 23."
"He's actually an incredible good guy too. That's what kills me."
– notquiteadequit
"God, what's even the point of gambling at that point? 8 million is enough to do whatever the f'k you want, assuming you don't do anything completely ridiculous."
– TruthOf42
Why You Say "No" To Drugs
"My ex friend Tom, over 10 years ago when we were teenagers he once said to me 'im going to try meth tonight' whilst we were at a bar (Australian) I literally knew nothing about drugs at the time especially meth i just knew it wasnt good, he invited me to join him but i said no because i had a gut feeling it wouldn’t end well for me. Since that day he went in and out of prison, lost all of his friends including me and completely changed as a person. Whilst walking with my wife and daughter a few months back i saw him walking his dog, he had obviously cleaned himself up, but it was like 2 strangers walking past each other. I took one silver lining out of this. It made me learn a lot about drugs all together and it showed me a different life i could have lead if i said yes all those years ago."
"Always say no to meth, it will ruin your life and take everything."
"EDIT: I forgot to add, tom had it all, a living gf, a great job etc"
– novicemma2
Not everything you strive for is exactly how you think it is.
Taking The Path With The Most Resistance
"My sister was offered an incredible well paying job doing something she's great at."
"She decided it would be too easy and opted for a far more challenging job, in a far less appealing setting, with an a**hole of a boss she was hoping to impress."
"She's f'king miserable now."
"I honestly don't get why she does this sort of shite to herself."
– callmevicious
After The Mid-Life Crisis
"A good friend I worked with for years was married to a great dude, super nice and everyone loved him, just a great guy all around. They had a couple middle school aged kids too. I think she was going through a mid-life crisis type thing but anywho, she reconnected with her old high school boyfriend on fb and they started having an affair. She ended up telling her husband about it and left him for the other guy, her husband was great about it, wanted her to be happy, great at co-parenting and didn't want to make anything harder on the kids, etc."
"The old HS boyfriend was toxic as hell, I met him a few times and he was an absolute d*ck. They fought constantly, every other week they were breaking up, kicking each other out(of her condo) or he'd just go missing for days at a time and she'd be a wreck wondering where he was; which was usually a couple hours away at the beach on a drug bender with his friends(he's in his late 40s btw)."
"She said she got bored with her life with her husband and wasn't attracted to him anymore, but I think she just went off the deep end and wanted something that wasn't there anymore; that feeling and excitement of young puppy love, but that's not what she got."
"I think some people just need drama in their life, I felt like she threw away a happy life just because she missed the drama."
Complacency is seen as an undesirable state of living. Boredom can make people feel uninspired.
And while setting goals and improving situations by becoming more active is admirable, people should also take the time to examine what is exactly lacking in their lives that make them feel as if they're stuck.
The examples above are just some reminders that making hasty decisions are not necessarily the best solutions.
Basically, check yourself before you wreck yourself.
Nothing will get you in more hot water with your boss than coming up with a lame excuse as to why you didn't show up for work.
Especially if that excuse doesn't even turn out to be true.
Of course, life can be unpredictable, and sometimes what you're telling your boss might very well be nothing but the truth.
You just might need some evidence to back it up.
However, there are some excuses that might be one hundred percent foolproof for getting out of work without any resistance from your boss or colleagues.
No matter who you are, or who you work for.
"What’s an excuse to get out of work that no one can get mad at?"
Any Excuse Is Better Than None
"As a manager as long as you let me know that you aren’t going to be able to work then we’re good."
"If you just don’t show up that’s a different story."- LF_redit
If You Say So Ok GIF by The GrinchGiphySay It, Don't Spray It...
"I got sprayed by a skunk."
"I tried to go to work after showering with Dawn dish soap but my boss told me to go home."
"So I’d say getting sprayed by a skunk."- Sunshine95454
Ultimately, Not A Pleasant Experience For Anyone...
"I worked construction, and two separate instances on two different crews, someone said they sh*t their pants."
"Nobody questioned it and they left."
"I do believe they did sh*t their pants tho so you have to commit."- allornothing26
"'I sh*t my pants'."
"Absolutely, 100%, understand."
"See you tomorrow."- Abadatha
year january GIFGiphyApparently Anything Regarding The Rear End...
“'Butthole is bleeding I can’t make it in'.”
"Not a single person will want to ask questions."
"You’re welcome."- Psychologystudent28
Oddly Impressive In This Day And Age... (Assuming It's True...)
"I called in to work and said I had scurvy."
"A couple hours later an FTD florist delivered a bonzi lemon tree from my boss."- HawkMisfit
Not So Much The What, But The When...
"The excuse doesn't matter it's the frequency."
'You need to be excused a couple of times a year?"
'No big deal."
'You're out every other week?"
'That's an issue."- Im_probably_naked
Netflix Seriously GIF by Stranger ThingsGiphyOr Better Yet, To A Hosptial!
"Me: hey I think I need to head home."
"Boss: Why’s that?
"Me: I think I broke my arm."
"I’m standing in front of my bosses desk with my arm turned completely backwards from the elbow down, was in total shock."- ssandhanitizer
Good Thing They Remembered To Call...
"Last time I called into work, it was a quick call."
“'Can’t make it in. Hit my head. Blood everywhere. Ambulance is on the way'.”
"That one worked pretty well."- bioVOLTAGE
Speechless Isn't Always Good...
"Guy at work phoned in to tell our boss he couldn’t make it in because he didn’t have no clean socks."
"Boss was speechless."- Tankclark1
Nbc GIF by The VoiceGiphyIf Only For Plumbing Issues...
"Diarrhea?"- menki_22
"I used to have a sh*tty office job."
"I once had severe diarrhea and my boss tried to get me to work from the bathroom, at the office."- adventurousorca
In a Post Pandemic World...
“'I’m sick'.”
"You don’t need more detail than that."- too_sexy_for_reddit
"Where I'm at Covid is still a mandatory out until a negative test."-azorianmilk
Test Virus GIF by Magician EdzusGiphyYou Can't Make This Stuff Up...
"Worked on a construction crew at one time with this one colorful character that just couldn't get out of bed and to work on time, but could do the work of two when he was on the job."
"He always had the most entertaining excuses for missing work that no one could be mad at him."
"'Ran over a rabbit and had to return home to put it in the freezer'." "
"'Scored some weed that was so good I forgot what day it was'."
"And the coup de grace...'Woke up with my face in my girlfriend's armpit and was afraid to open my eyes'."- eron6000ad
Family First
"Something wrong with your kid."
"I've honestly thought about making up a kid just so I have an airtight excuse to cut out as often as my parent coworkers do."- Yak-F**ker-5000
In truth, pretty much any excuse could probably work
What's more important, is an air-tight alibi...
Bobby Darin had a life full of triumphs and mysteries. From his humble beginnings and bone-shaking family secrets to his meteoric rise as a singer and actor, it was one wild—and tragically short—ride.
1. He Was A Weak Child
Bobby Darin was born Walden Robert Cassotto on May 14, 1936—but his innocence left him far too soon. When he was just eight years old, doctors diagnosed Darin was diagnosed with multiple bouts rheumatic fever, which seriously damaged his heart. The medics painted a grim picture, predicting a short life expectancy for the young boy. It had other consequences, too.
2. His Family Spoiled Him
Because of Darin's precarious health, his family absolutely doted on the boy. They called him "the King" amongst each other, and pampered him within an inch of his life. This was a very bad idea. Before long, Darin grew self-absorbed and selfish.
His own sister admitted, "I’m not saying that he should not have been protected…I’m saying we should have also made him into a human being, and we didn’t do it". But the dye was already in the wool.
3. He Was An Academic Genius Too
With the sense that the grim reaper was always at his door, along with his family's unfailing adoration of him, Darin soon developed a burning ambition to make something of himself. He was a very clever student, outperforming most of his peers...but this had a downside. The other students ruthlessly teased him—and had a shocking effect on him.
4. His Behavior Was Not Charming
During his teen years, Darin developed a somewhat disturbing persona. At that time, he didn’t realize that he was becoming very arrogant, but as time passed, he came to terms with his problem. He said that his bright peers used to tease him and make him feel insecure. That’s why he gravitated towards a career that made him feel better—drama school.
Still, he had one more thing to do before starting out.
5. He Changed His Name
Fitxer:Bobby Darin 1959.JPG - Viquipèdia, l'enciclopèdia lliureca.m.wikipedia.orgBobby Darin was well-prepared for drama school and his lifelong dream of being a musician. There was only one minor issue—his name. The way Darin picked his last name was very random. When he saw a malfunctioning sign at a Chinese restaurant saying “Darin Duck” instead of “Mandarin Duck," he felt inspired—I guess.
Some people claim that he picked it out of a telephone book and that the restaurant story was a lie. Indeed, there is no proof for either story. Either way, he was ready to kickstart a career.
6. His Breakthrough Was Amazing
Unfortunately, life didn’t quite go as Darin planned—at least for a while. One recording after the other, he failed and failed. Still, he was resilient and curious—and in 1958, he recorded a song titled “Splish Splash” hoping to have his big break. Finally, he made it—the song sold more than a million copies in the blink of an eye. In fact, it was only the beginning.
7. He Met Someone
From teenagers bopping to the infectious beat to parents smiling at the boyish charm emanating from their radios, Darin's breakthrough had arrived. He wanted to keep pace, so he began collaborating with other newcomers to get inspired and hopefully sell more hits. Life gave him what he wanted, but it also steered him into the company of someone special.
Her name was Connie Francis, a then up-and-coming singer—and she was going to rock Darin's world.
8. He Found His Partner
Francis and Darin were meant to write songs together and try to shine in this dog-eat-dog world. At that time, both of them were famous, but not superstars. Together, though, they had a supernova effect. They started spending every minute together, and as you can guess, their artistic match quickly turned into a romantic flame.
9. He Wooed Her Good
Although it wasn’t love at first sight for Darin, Francis noted that Darin was the love of her life. She didn’t care about anything when it came to Darin. In fact, she once found Darin in bed with two sketchy women, but that scandalous encounter didn't make her bat a single eyelash. Still, their bizarre relationship was about to get even weirder.
One day, after one of Francis’ performances, Darin came up with a wild idea.
10. He Wanted To Elope
File:Connie Francis.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgBobby Darin—who had a very prince-like upbringing—was used to getting what he wanted, and he wanted to marry Connie Francis. After her show ended, he said that they should elope and get married. Why? Because he knew there was no way Francis’ controlling father would agree to this.
The only person he needed to convince was Francis, but he forgot one important detail.
11. His Future Father-In-Law Hated Him
Francis’ father despised Darin and he did everything in his power to end this relationship, yet this wasn’t the main problem. The problem was that Francis was a daddy’s girl—and when one day, Francis’ father physically threatened Darin and chased him out of a building, Francis knew that it was either her father or Darin. She called it quits and hurt Darin deeply.
He was sad—but soon realized that he had bigger fish to fry.
12. He Had Extravagant Dreams
Darin wanted to be larger than life. He spent countless hours in the recording studio, obsessing over every note and lyric, striving for a flawless performance. His attention to detail was legendary because he wanted to be legendary. As he put it, “I want to be a legend by the time I'm 25”.
Nevertheless, he knew that he had to expand his horizons if he wanted to be one of the greats.
13. He Had Trouble Memorizing A Song
In 1956, Darin seemed to expand his horizons and made his TV debut. It was a memorable moment for him because it represented the fast-paced environment of TV for him. He scored an appearance on The Dorsey Brothers’ Stage Show and the team expected him to perform “Rock Island Line”.
Darin didn’t know the lyrics and he basically had no time to learn them, so he had to write them on his palms and tried to catch a glimpse of them while performing. This marked the beginning of his multifaceted career—and made him even more arrogant.
14. He Lost A Friend
Darin had a reputation for being a little bit snobby, and it was about to cost him a dear friend. He felt, acted, and lived like a legend, yet some of his old friends didn’t like his attitude. One of them was another legendary musician Sammy Davis Jr who had been friends with Darin for a while.
Fed up with his attitude, Davis told Darin, “Let me know when you stop being a legend so we can be friends again,” and walked out of his life. But not everyone felt as strongly as Davis.
15. He Had A Mentor
File:George Burns 1961.JPG - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgEven though some of Darin’s friends shared the same feelings as Davis, others felt very differently. For example, George Burns—who gave Darin his first chance to perform—knew that, beyond his sometimes disturbing bravado, Bobby Darin had a heart of gold. At first, Darin considered Burns as his mentor, but it turned into a more intimate relationship fast.
16. He Had A Father/Son Rapport With Him
Since Darin lost many friends due to his “hard to get along with” personality, he began spending more time with Burns. As time passed by, Burns began thinking of Darin as more of a son. Due to their strong friendship, when Burns' life took a dark and painful turn, Darin was the first one to lend a helping hand.
17. He Took Care Of His Friend
In 1964, Burns lost someone very close to his heart—his wife—and he was significantly depressed. That was when Darin stepped in. Burns said that “When Gracie died, Bobby slept in my bedroom with me for three or four nights”. Not only did Darin take care of Burns, but he also spoke with him and gave him some friendly advice. The advice he gave to Burns changed his life.
18. He Saved Him
Darin noticed that Burns would sometimes cry all night and not sleep at all. The worried musician had to leave at some point, but he wanted Burns to get better before he did. He then suggested Burns sleep in Gracie’s bed so that he’d feel better. This advice changed Burns’ life because he finally started getting some shut-eye, and moreover, learned to move on.
Darin was a miracle worker when it came to solving other people’s issues—even though his own problems were downright alarming.
19. He Began Acting
Multi-talented entertainer Darin was not content with confining himself to a single facet of the entertainment industry. After his TV debut, he then ventured into acting, eager to showcase his talent on the big screen—and he was good at it.
He scored a huge project called Come September—a movie where he shared the lead with the iconic Sandra Dee, an innocent girl-next-door type of actress who became a household name before Darin. Little did he know, he was in for the ride of his life.
20. His Co-Star Was Lovely
File:Sandra Dee 1959.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgWhen Darin began filming and met his co-star, he was charmed by Dee. According to their son’s recollection, “He was standing on the shore wearing a yellow suit, and she was in a boat just pulling in to dock,” and then he shouted, “Will you marry me?” to which she replied, “Not today”.
According to Darin, it was a mutual attraction, but Dee told a very different story.
21. His Co-Star Didn’t Reciprocate
According to Dee, Darin was nowhere near charming. In fact, she thought he was very arrogant. As Dee put it, "I didn’t want anything to do with him”. She was also very clear with her “I’m not interested” attitude, but Darin was not willing to give up. After all, he'd gotten everything he ever wanted in his life up until this point. So he pressed harder.
22. He Had Finesse, Sort Of
Darin orchestrated numerous gestures and silly jokes to charm his way into Dee’s life. Some of them were very silly, such as chanting “Sandra Dee has a flea," while others were pretty clever. He wooed Dee’s mother and turned her into his wingman, asking her to convince Dee to go on a date with him. It was a good plan, and surprisingly, it worked.
23. He Fell In Love With Her
Darin finally scored a date with Dee—the hard part was over. He planned a carriage ride with her, and their first date was a total game-changer. It was clear that Darin was falling in love with her dangerously fast, but the shocking part was that Dee began to have feelings too.
At the end of the date, Darin’s honesty and sincerity won Dee’s heart.
24. He Got The Girl
In no time, the two became lovebirds, flirting and laughing all over the set. By December 1960, the two wanted to get married. Dee later recalled what happened, saying “I do remember my thoughts that first morning when I woke up in bed with my husband, I thought I had never felt so safe in my life as I felt with Bobby”.
But sadly, this heady honeymoon phase was the only silver lining of their doomed marriage.
25. He Had A Real Son
File:Bobby Darin Betsy Hale Wagon Train 1964.JPG - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgIt was time for Darin to play the role of a real dad in life instead of a pretend one in a story. On December 16, 1961, his beautiful bride gave him an amazing son named Dodd Mitchell Darin. They were a family of three, but sadly, little Dodd just missed the happy family train. He had two very problematic parents.
26. Marriage Wasn’t What He Expected
In the Dee and Darin household, the good times were officially over—yet, Darin didn’t even realize it. He was still living the party life and expecting his wife to join in too. Their son later recalled that Darin expected Dee to be ready and steady for every occasion and every party with “the boys” whether it was at a show or at a casino.
Understandably, this frustrated Dee to no end.
27. His Wife Was Unhappy
Dee began complaining because Darin began treating her as a trophy wife rather than a partner and a friend. She was sick of sitting through shows and then waiting for Darin to come home after he went partying with “the guys”. She recalled, “I had no life, and we had no life together”.
Dee began feeling claustrophobic, so she picked up a filthy habit.
28. They Were Deteriorating
Darin and Dee's messy marriage had stupefying consequences. They were not only harming their lives as a married couple but their professionalism as well. How? Well, they did everything in their power to mess with each other—and once every while, they crossed the line—because in Dee’s words, they were “bored”.
29. They Acted Childish
While Darin emotionally manipulated Dee and often reduced her to tears, Dee eased her pain with a bottle every night. Wanting to retaliate, she would often find silly ways to criticize Darin’s looks.
Dee would demoralize Darin and tell him his toupee was crooked before he appeared on shows to “stir things up”. Darin, once he was done making Dee cry, tapped into his paranoid side and made everything even worse.
30. He Had Conspiracy Theories About His Wife
File:Sandra Dee & Bobby Darin, Photoplay March 1961.jpg ...commons.wikimedia.orgDarin often obsessed over Dee’s relationships with her coworkers. Since they had fallen in love on set, what was to stop her from having an affair with another one of her co-stars? Therefore, when Dee began the production of her new movie Tammy and the Doctor, Darin began acting overly suspicious every time Dee spent some time with her co-star Peter Fonda.
31. He Wanted Out
In 1963, Darin could no longer shake off the feeling that his wife was having an affair. He acted up and told her he wanted a divorce, telling Dee the nonsensical reason behind this decision. Dee was both furious and disappointed. She repeatedly denied the claims, eventually convincing Darin to rethink his accusations.
Sadly, this didn’t magically solve their problems.
32. He Was Still Jealous
After almost breaking up with his wife, Darin felt like he needed to make an effort, and so did Dee. He committed all his time to being a good father and an easy-going husband, but there was one big issue: his jealousy. He was unreasonable and paranoid.
On one occasion, he lost his mind over the fact that Dee talked to Warren Beatty at a party. He was silent about it—but behind closed doors, it was a different story.
33. He Made A Decision
Darin didn’t know what to do or how to fix his jealousy problem, so he took the easy way out. Still, he wasn’t bold enough to face Dee, so he went behind her back. In a jaw-dropping act, he had his psychiatrist tell Dee that he wanted out. In the blink of an eye, they separated for good...and then began the hardest year of his life: 1968.
34. He Made A New Friend
1968 started off as a very busy year for Darin—he became more politically active and worked on Robert F Kennedy’s presidential campaign. Beyond the working relationship, Kennedy and Darin developed a very close friendship. Darin considered Kennedy his hero, and one of the main reasons he got more involved in politics.
Soon after, Kennedy became the main reason for his grief.
35. He Suffered A Loss
File:Robert F. Kennedy 1964.jpeg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgDarin felt strongly about Kennedy—but he almost witnessed his demise. He was traveling with Kennedy and he even made it to the politician's final destination—California. Darin stayed at the Ambassador Hotel and was one of the last people who ever saw him before a horrendous assassination ripped Kennedy out of his life.
36. He Didn't Leave His Side
Darin threw himself into recording new types of music while trying to shake off the trauma of losing Bobby Kennedy. He was so shaken by Kennedy’s death that, reportedly, when the coffin was above ground, awaiting burial, Darin stayed with Kennedy’s body all night.
But this wasn't the only event that turned Darin's life upside down.
37. His Heart Couldn't Take It
Even though he worked tirelessly to live with it, Darin’s heart was very fragile—and he'd had a frail constitution since childhood. As time passed, his heart got weaker and weaker—but his divorce was the last nail in the coffin. By the 1970s, Darin's health was not doing well. He felt alone and miserable, so he went crawling back to Dee.
38. His Ex-Wife Still Loved Him
In the 1970s, his ex-wife saw him getting sicker by the day—and despite their turbulent past, she couldn’t leave him alone like that. According to Dee, “He would come to the door with his vitamins and say, 'I have nowhere to go'". She knew she had a soft spot for Darin, so every time she would let him in and as she put it, “things would start again”.
However, it wasn't long before Darin began knocking on someone else’s door.
39. There Was Another Woman
In 1970, Darin found love for the second time—this time, she went by the name of Andrea Yeager. Unlike Dee, she wasn’t a world-class actress, but a humble secretary. Even Darin’s friends said that “You couldn't have a more stand-up person around you. She didn’t want anything from Bobby,” and Darin fell head over heels in love with her.
40. He Underwent Surgery
File:Bobby Darin Abby Dalton Hennessey 1959.JPG - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgAfter a year filled with medicine and dire side effects, Darin's doctors finally told him that his heart needed surgery. In January 1971, he underwent an artificial valve implant—a painful surgery with a long recovery period. When he opened his eyes, he began the next chapter of his life: trying to heal his broken heart.
41. Love Healed Him
According to one of Darin’s friends, Yeager was “willing to confront the grim reality of his illness and help him in any way she could” and it was working. Darin began performing again, and Yeager was there whenever he felt bad. Reportedly, Darin was often administered oxygen during or after he performed, but he kept performing, and Yeager kept helping him.
Yeager's devotion was undeniable and it influenced Darin to give love another shot.
42. She Became His Wife
After three years of living together, Darin and Yeager decided to turn it up a notch. In the summer of 1973, the two made their wedding vows and became husband and wife—they were already committed to each other in sickness and in health. However, Darin’s sickness tested their limits.
If Darin thought he'd found his "happily ever after," he was so wrong.
43. They Fell Apart
Only four months later, Darin’s worsening health worsened his relationship. He was living in desperation and the woman he once loved had reached the end of her rope. In October 1973, the fairytale romance came to an end and they divorced.
Only 37 years old, Darin was a divorced man for the second time—but fate had another horrible twist in store for him.
44. His Last Visit Was Unexpected
The same year, Darin made a mistake that led to serious consequences. When he had a dental appointment in 1973, he failed to take his antibiotics—which protected his heart. This caused an overwhelming systemic infection and weakened his heart to very dangerous levels. Due to sepsis, he ended up in the hospital.
Sadly, this was the beginning of the end.
45. He Never Woke Up
File:Bobby Darin 1972.JPG - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgOn December 11, 1973, Darin scheduled another hazardous heart surgery at the Cedars of Lebanon Hospital in Los Angeles. A surgical team worked for six hours straight to repair his heart for the second time. Sadly, this second operation time wasn’t as successful as the one he'd had in 1971. Bobby Darin never woke up. Only 37 years old, the musician passed away in the recovery room.
46. They Made A Movie About Him
Darin’s early death shook some people, while his action-filled life inspired others to share his story. Director Barry Levinson was in the latter group. In 1997, he began working on a film that intended to tell Darin's crazy life story—but like most of Darin’s dreams, it remained unfinished. However, someone else had their eye on the singer's legacy.
Kevin Spacey took over the project along with the help of Darin’s son, Dodd. The result? A biopic called Beyond theSea.
47. His Legacy Was Gone
It seemed like tragedy followed Darin wherever he went, even after his death. In 2008, The New York Times reported that in the Universal Studios fire, Darin’s work—among hundreds of other artists—was destroyed. Based on what we know of him, it was probably best that Darin was not alive to witness this tragedy.
48. They Made A Musical Too
Dodd Darin got involved in a musical project to commemorate his father. The musical—called Dream Lover: The Bobby Darin Musical—aimed to delve deeper into Darin’s problematic relationship with his mother and grandmother. However, Dodd had something heartbreaking to say about the casting of David Campbell in the lead role.
49. His Son Knew He Was The Right Fit
Dodd noted that “You have to have lived something like that to understand it and [Campbell] has, and I think he can relate to my dad, he can relate to the pain”. Campbell must have been a perfect fit to play Darin because the musical received very positive reviews.
After it premiered in 2016, the production got best musical and best male lead nominations. More importantly, it gave Darin and his human side the recognition he deserved.
50. He Learned His Family's Secret
File:Bobby Darin Petula Clark 1967.JPG - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.orgThe same year Darin lost Kennedy, he learned something jaw-dropping about his own past. He discovered his family's wildest secret. See, his mother Nina was just 17 years old when she had him, and to cover up her teen pregnancy she passed him off as her younger brother. Instead, Darin grew up believing his grandmother was his mother.
Nina finally confessed this, sending Darin into a tailspin. However, there was another question on the tip of his tongue.
Chances are you've heard phrases like "our little miracle" or "bundle of joy" or something in a similar vein.
Those phrases are usually used to refer to babies.
When someone really wants a baby, and has the financial means, emotional support, and maturity to raise said baby, then they should definitely have one. Bringing a life into this world, or taking care of a life that has no one else to care for them, is wonderful.
However, wanting (and being able to support and take care of) a baby is the only good reason to have one.
Not because you think it's what you're supposed to do, or you want to make your parents happy by giving them a grandchild, or because you think it'll keep your marriage together, or any number of other reasons people will give you.
Chances are you've probably also heard the saying "Every child deserves parents, but not all parents deserve children."
That can be very true if you have a child for any other reason than truly wanting one.
Redditors know this all too well and are ready to share what they think are the absolute worst reasons to have a baby.
It all started when Redditor callmevicious asked:
"What is the worst reason to have a baby? Why?"
Heal Me
"My dad had an incredibly f**ked up and traumatizing childhood. instead of dealing with his subsequent mental illnesses a person at his church told him to "have lots of kids, it will heal your trauma." so he had six and we ended up homeless at certain points and traumatized ourselves. idiot"
– No-Tailor5120
"To distract yourself from a traumatic experience (robbed at gun point)."
"A long time back, a coworker told me this after our conversation about what happened. She said it'd distract me .. then she said I was selfish for telling her that was a horrible idea."
– MissedPlacedSpoon
"A lot of people use children as a lackluster attempt at avoiding therapy, which is actually exactly when you shouldn't be having a child surprisingly enough. You want to bring a child into the world under the idea that you'll give them the best you can so they can be happy, not the other way around."
– GreasyPeter
Exposure
"To use it as a content on social media."
– Human-Independent999
"This is my baby, Beigeleigh! She's my favorite now that Roxynn is 2 and throws tantrums that don't fit my ✨aesthetic✨."
– CovfefeBoss
"Honestly though this happens."
"The one thing that comes to mind is a couple adopting a young kid from Indonesia (I think). They were well into the process when the adoption agency found them and saw that they had a social media presence where they gave updates to their followers on the process. The agency told them that they have a policy where within a year of adoption, the adopters are not permitted to post the child on social media or make any specific comments regarding the child."
"Instead of being reasonable people, they simply canceled the adoption process entirely. It truly is borderline evil, especially since they just wanted an adopted kid for clout and couldn’t wait a year."
– Ori_the_SG
Under Pressure
"Your parent(s) wanted grandkids."
– ninjamullet
"Ugh, my family would tell me that they'd pay for everything if I had a kid (money was my main reason I was waiting when I was younger)."
"I eventually had a kid and they haven't given me a f**king penny. Bunch of liars. My wife and I will jokingly bring it up when we see them. They always get embarrassed and change the subject."
– lovepig1337
"My mother: "I want grandkids!""
"Me: "you have 2 other children to ask""
– t0m0hawk
Scoring Points
"To compete with someone."
– Mobile_Prune_3207
"You get +5 Jesus points for every kid after the fourth one."
– unlockdestiny
"What prizes can you get with those points?"
– NoRJoke
"To save the relationship."
"It never works, it just drags an innocent baby into a miserable situation."
– eviehalboro
"This is more common than people think."
"I have to wonder if anyone, anywhere, EVER has actually improved a relationship by having a child."
"I'm sure some have managed to extend the life of a troubled relationship by adding a baby to the mix. But improving the relationship? Making it a relationship worth staying in?"
"I don't see that happening."
– callmevicious
If Everyone Else Jumped Off A Bridge...
"Because everyone else has one."
– justregularoleme
"This seems like the main reason for the people I know."
– emmiepemmie
Existing For Someone Else's Benefit
"To have an organ donor for later?"
– Fenfirae
"Unfortunately there are people out there with children with terminal illnesses that will purposely have more babies to see if they are donor matches for kidneys and bone marrow. I personally think it’s abuse."
– sunshinedaisies9-34
"Saviour Siblings! Like in My Sisters Keeper. Horrible indeed."
– p0tatoontherun
If At First, You Don't Succeed...
"Having a kid for a specific gender"
– Independent-Blood-10
"Seen a lot of this, like the TikTok trend "Our parents wanted a boy so we are 6 girls and no boy yet" Like wtf are you going to keep breeding until you hit it? Sounds like there will be a favorite kid in that family."
– Drkz98
Caregivers
"To be responsible for their disabled sibling in the future (yes, i had a friend tell me she wanted another child so that her disabled son would have someone when/if she passed away)."
– Natti07
"This is why my parents kept me. My parents tried to pressure me into not joining the military or flight school because who's gonna take care of my brother if something happens to me? My dad has said multiple times since I was like 5 or 6 that I'm gonna have to take care of him when they die. I love my brother, but I want my own life too..."
– idc_anymore-fml
Live Vicariously
"Using them to fulfill your childhood dreams (Forcing them to be into sports when you weren't, etc)."
– Joetueant
"This was my dad. I'll never forget going to my little brother's gender reveal sonogram and my dad said, "I'll finally have my football star!" My brother is 19 and has always been a nerd. My sister was the most athletic of all of us and she purposely injured herself in high school so he couldn't force her to be in sports anymore."
– T8795
"Pageant moms have all joined the chat."
– Stellathewizard
Awww, Adorable!
"Because you find them cute. They aren’t a pet."
– k-Musician8345
Alternate History
"To fix your relationship/marriage"
– GoodAlicia
"Well, it would have helped Henry the VIII."
– lekanly
"I think you have to specify a son in this situation, but yeah. Imagine if Catherine of Aragon had a son or two. Henry might just be a blip on the radar of English monarchs without all the fuss and bother of 6 wives, etc. But then we wouldn't have had Elizabeth I and that makes me a little sad."
– reduff
"Yeah he probably wouldn't have needed to create the church of England either"
– ThanksverymuchHutch
"Imagine an alternative history where the coin hit tails and Henry VIII got his son, suddenly Catholicism probably gets a century more to reign in England, maybe even stopping the 30 year war from ever happening."
– TheSwecurse
My head is spinning just thinking about all that!