Every now and then I think of Ben and Arthur—written, directed, produced, edited, and imposed on humanity by Sam Mraovich—and just shudder.
It's a film about a gay couple that somehow sets gay rights back several decades, such is the state of this vanity project loaded with production gaffes and featuring the most painful script written by someone who truly believed they were making something brilliant.
It's an "I want my time back" film.
People were all too keen to share the movies that wasted their time after Redditor RedditMayne asked the online community:
"What movie was so bad it actually made you angry?"
"It's so sad."
"Pocahontas II. John Smith basically just dumps her. It's so stupid."
One of the most unnecessary films I have seen but I could say that about a ton of other Disney flicks, too.
"It made me especially angry..."
"The 1998 Avengers, with Sean Connery, Ralph Fiennes, and Uma Thurman. Saw it in the theater."
"It made me especially angry not only because it was really really bad, but also because I had wanted to see Saving Private Ryan that same night but my buddies didn't."
It seems Marvel's The Avengers has wiped this film from public memory (even if the 1998 film is an adaptation of the British series and not a superhero film).
"No further explanation needed."
"Eragon. No further explanation needed."
I never read the books but the anger this movie inspires is enough for me to never watch it.
"I don't even know how you screw up something like the Dark Tower."
"During a time when every studio in the world was scrambling to jump on the Cinematic Universe train, and multiverses were starting to become a mainstream concept why would you take a property with those concepts woven into the very fabric of the story and completely ignore it?"
I have refused to watch this.
I just can't.
Amazon canceled an adaptation once, which is such a shame.
"It's not enough."
"Dragon Ball Evolution."
"I know the director apologized for making the film."
"I don't care. It's not enough."
"That crap pissed me off and I only ever watched it once."
We don't talk about this movie.
"The Secret - This pseudo-documentary about positive thinking and 'the law of attraction.'"
"My coworker convinced our supervisor to have the whole team watch it. I managed to keep a straight face until some guy said, 'We don't know what electricity is, but we know it can cook a man's dinner'."
Some friends had me sit through this.
They are now my former friends.
"What a tragedy."
"A Sound Of Thunder, a terrible, terrible film adaptation of the late Ray Bradbury's excellent time travel short story."
"Bonkers 'physics', 90s Amiga era CGI, and Ben Kingsley's ridiculous hair. What a tragedy!"
I remember when this came out.
It was 2005 and the trailer was everywhere.
Then it promptly disappeared from the planet.
"My friend and I were so excited..."
"Percy Jackson. My friend and I were so excited to get it from the video store and so upset as soon as it started."
Never read the series but see my comment for Eragon.
I think it applies here, too.
"I heard there were bad reviews..."
"Holmes & Watson."
"I'm shocked I haven't seen this listed. Like the movies they have made together before were absolutely hilarious. I f**king love Step Brothers."
'I heard there were bad reviews for this movie but nothing actually prepared me for what I was going to experience when I turned it on. It was beyond stupid. There is stupid comedy but this was… just not."
"I didn't laugh one time. Instead, I was repulsed and irritated. I turned it off."
"I couldn't continue. I was stressed out, actually; about how absolutely awful this f**king film is. It caused me anxiety."
"I don't know how the ending goes, and I don't care to know. All I know is I hate how much I've watched and it was enough."
I mean, it looked terrible from the trailers.
Why did people sit through this?!
"Killed the female hero in a dumb way..."
"Pacific Rim 2 was bad fan fiction. Killed the female hero in a dumb way and the male hero didn't even get a mention."
"The designs were as ugly as possible and moved like Power Rangers."
"And they had teenagers doing funny things in them. S**t was so bad it killed a great franchise with even toys still selling since the first one in 2013."
I feel like this film came and went immediately—and it sounds like for good reason.
Well, well, well...
There you have it.
Avoid these at all costs. And if you have somehow managed not to... we are sorry.
Have some thoughts on movies that are not listed here? Want to vent your hate?
Feel free to sound off in the comments below!
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Cats are fascinating creatures.
Obligate carnivores, it's a tiny predator in your home.
But cats aren't for everyone.
People should make an informed decision before inviting one of these tiny tigers into their home.
Redditor lostinlovely asked:
"What should someone know before getting a cat?"
"Make sure you have a lot of room on your phone for photos."
"Most kittens are wild! No matter what."
"If you want a docile cat, adopt an older one."
"They calm down but you can't expect a baby to be that way."
"It's not uncommon for a cat to live to 20 years."
"Be ready to wake up frantic, thinking someone broke in to find out it’s only your cat having a spaz attack."
"Also, get ready to have its butthole in your face. My cat likes to try and sit on our chest with his rear end in our face."
"Your keyboard? Theirs."
"Any empty cardboard boxes? Theirs."
"Your will? Theirs."
"One mistake I see inexperienced new cat owners make is they try to 'play' with the cat like with a dog. Tease it, get in their faces with toys, overstimulate it."
"Cats are wonderful companions. You just have to let them choose when and how they will interact with you."
"Be a little gentle with them. Talk sweet. Get to know them and what they like."
"Cats like their litter box to be cleaned out often otherwise they'll be petty and pee on any clothes you have laying around, shoes, blankets, etc..."
"Keep their litter box clean or you'll pay!!"
"It'll keep your house from smelling like a litter box in the long run anyway."
A for Effort
"They respond to effort. They won’t love you unconditionally like a dog will."
"A cat that is given time, patience, good care, and socializing will almost always warm up to their people and become affectionate.
"It just requires more work to earn that affection than a dog. You get out of a pet cat what you put into it."
"They need way more activity then a lot of people think."
"Sure they mostly lay around, but they need activity and play everyday to be happy!"
"You need to ask yourself if you're ready to be owned by a cat."
Being owned by a cat can be the best decision you've ever made, as long as you go in prepared.
Cats are not fluffy dogs.
But if that aloof, smart, independent energy suits you, adopt yourself out to a cat.
Body modification procedures are not uncommon these days.
If it makes a person have an improved perception of their bodies, the option for body enhancement should be available to them without judgment.
The people of Reddit explored ideas for improving the human penis when Redditor BleakPidgeon asked:
"If you were able to design penis 2.0, what would you change?"
People fantasize about being able to dictate the behavior of the phallus.
"Manual horny control. I can turn off my horniness whenever I want."
They Say When
"I don't have a penis, but I imagine it'd be quite helpful for men to be able to *choose* when they get their boners instead of it happening randomly."
Change In Direction
"I can control which way it bends."
"Ejaculate control. Not a drop comes out until the user wishes it to."
A Hard Fix
"Same for erections. They happen when you want them, and you have a dial for controlling the erection. These two features would have given us a fighting chance against our robotic overlords."
Different functions to the Johnson would please these Redditors.
The Spray Option
"I would add a small spray type shifter around the circumference of the area just behind the head of the penis just like the hose nozzles to change how the fluid comes out of the penis."
"No longer shall we suffer from missing the toilet with a jetspeed straight line piss option."
"No longer shall we feel the pain of passing a kidney stone with the mist option."
"No longer shall we struggle with producing large loads for our SOs satisfaction with the large sloppy stream option."
"We will truly be the most advanced adaptation of the human."
Setting The Pulse
"It will vibrate."
For Business Or Pleasure
"Make it have 2 modes:"
"Mode 1 - just sex - can still ejaculate as usual but cannot get anyone pregnant. Can control when the orgasm happens so you can have longer sex or quickies depending on the situation."
"Mode 2 - baby making mode."
With Great Pleasure
"Multiple orgasms without having to cum but they all lead up to a spectacular one in which you do cum."
"It will go flaccid and retract into the pelvis if there are STDs within 5 feet."
"Family gatherings are going to be awkward."
Some of the requests were innocuous.
"It can talk. I get lonely sometimes."
No More Competition
"I would make them all the same size. It would probably create world peace and harmony 😂"
If an option for an improved pecker was available, what changes would you suggest for an ultimate penile experience?
Being the one to start a conversation can be pretty awkward if there's no context.
We're not all chatty Cathys and just walking up and saying "hi!" really only works if you're an adorable extrovert (or toddler. mostly toddler.)
So how are we supposed to, like, talk to people?
Reddit user Eviotie asked:
"What is the best conversation starter you know?"
I'm not saying the answers are all right here. Some of these might actually be awful ideas - we're not the experts.
All we're saying is Reddit is full of "creative" conversationalists.
" 'So, you got any life regrets?' - my barber, the first time I walked in his shop."
"My only thought to that would be:"
" 'Jesus does my hair look that bad!?' "
"I once had an old Italian guy for a barber that, upon the fourth or fifth visit, proudly informed me that he was Benito Mussolini’s personal chauffeur."
"He would from then on tell me stories in praise of the man. This was around 20 years ago."
Exciting And Engaging ... Kinda
" 'Hey, you got anything you're looking forward to soon?' "
"Not only is it a great starter, but it is also really engaging because they're talking about something exciting."
"I use this so often!!"
"I used to use this one, but so many in my small town are just taking life day by day."
The Scott Pilgrim Method
"Did you know that the original name for Pac-Man was Puck-Man? You'd think it was because he looks like a hockey puck but it actually comes from the Japanese phrase 'Paku-Paku,' which means to flap one's mouth open and closed. They changed it because they thought Puck-Man would be too easy to vandalize, you know, like people could just scratch off the P and turn it into an F or whatever."
- whataboutschismscott pilgrim gideon graves GIFGiphy
Be A Pet Detective
"Actual answer: just ask about their pets."
"If they don't have any, ask if they'd ever want any."
"Even if they don't want any, they usually have a reason why."
"Ask them if they have pets."
"If they do, they'll gladly talk about it till the cows come home. Or they'll talk about the pets they wanted as kids or still want. Or about animals they like."
"If it turns out they don't like animals, you dodged bullet and they wouldn't have been fun to talk to anyway 😂 "
Know Your Audience
"Well, you have to know your audience."
"The best conversation starter for any millennial would be to use a SpongeBob reference."
"It’s usually met with a resounding sense of familiarity and laughter and streams into so many other references from the show, which then spirals into all Nickelodeon shows from of our generation, then Disney… the nostalgia wormhole is never ending and will always be a rousing topic of discussion among our kind."
"Intense nostalgia for the years of our youth cripples us and we will never not take a minute to revel in our glory years and all the amazing content those years produced for the world!!! :’) "
A Little Conditioning
" 'Give me some good news!' Works especially well with coworkers."
"Let them know the answer can be absolutely anything. Anything from the plans for the weekend to them enjoying the weather. Sometimes it's as simple as a song they liked was on the radio this morning."
"It puts people in a positive mindset of thinking when talking with you. Especially if you make it a habit of asking often."
"Once people get used to the question you can see them look forward to it when you walk in."
- GlumBridgeJeff Goldblum Reaction GIF by Apartments.comGiphy
You're Both Surrounded
"Talk about how they know the host of the party or which band they came out for or whatever."
"Just talk about the environment you're both surrounded by. What is the commonality?"
"It's a lot easier to transition into a natural flowing conversation from there."
Travel ... Maybe
"Actual answer: travel."
"Pretty much everyone enjoys travel and there are a lot of questions people can ask if you are planning a vacation or just got back from a vacation. Then you can ask them where they have been/want to go."
"Yeah this doesn't work with poor people. Where TF are we traveling to, the check cashing store?"
A Safer Route
"If I am meeting a person from a different culture, or race, or country, or religion, I ask one of two questions that cannot offend anyone."
" 'Tell me about your favourite food from your childhood.' "
" 'Tell me about the kind of music you listened to as a child.' (What instruments, singing style etc.)"
"People's childhood is often a safe topic, because there was no politics etc."
"But even if there was some awful thing that happened, if they choose to tell you about it, it is a sign that they trust you to understand, about the war, the earthquake, the loss of their parents, whatever trauma they endured."
- TheonAlexanderHungry Italian GIF by 8itGiphy
My Go-To Drunk Bathroom Conversation Starter
"If you’re a woman who is trying to make friends with women: astrology."
"Doesn’t matter how much or how little you know or how seriously you take it. Women use astrology as an excuse to talk to each other."
“ 'Okay but I can’t help but notice you have Leo/Aquarius vibes?' is my go-to drunk bathroom conversation starter with whoever has the coolest outfit."
"I’ve made 5 friends this way😁"
Like I said, creative conversationalists, aren't they?
But what about you? What's your favorite way to start conversations? Or are you the type who would rather die than have to initiate a conversation with a stranger?
Tell us in the comments.
There are just some things in life that are not necessary knowledge.
Maybe we always hold out that tiny bit of hope we will one day be on Jeopardy... because you never know.
It's the creepy facts about life that leave me wondering and reeling.
RedditorsPanzer_ace_8wanted to compare notes on the things we're aware of that maybe we wish we could forget. They asked:
"What’s a disturbing fact you know?"
I mostly know disturbing facts about serial killers. As if that isn't enough. This should be fun.
Rest WellHand Pain GIF by PetelskiGiphy
"The skin mites that live on your cheeks come to the surface at night to find mates and do the deed. Sleep well."
"If you were to eat another adult human being, it would be approximately 125,822 calories. I went down a rabbit hole on Google and yeah."
"How come it's almost 126K?"
"Math. Average human is say 70 kg, has 20% bodyfat, so 14kg of fat. Fat has 9kcal per gram, which makes it. 126,000kcal. Math never lies! But I do make plenty of mistakes. Probably it's more complicated - but directionally seems legit."
"Within three days of death, the enzymes from your digestive system begin to digest your body."
"I guess it’s reassuring to know your body decays before bugs can even get a shot to help your body decay, sort of like a medical death except your body willingly does it for you instead of doctors."
People on Earthseason 11 people GIFGiphy
"If you are 25 years old, approximately 1/3 of the entire world's population that existed at your birth, have since died."
How do people just stumble upon this sort of info? Y'all must read.
GotchaKaty Perry Sharks GIF by VevoGiphy
"Some species of shark will 'waddle' onto land in order to catch more prey."
"During World War 2, Japan bombed China with fleas infected with the bubonic plague."
"Man they were just straight attempting to kill as many civilians of possible with that one."
"This is why a large portion of Chinese loathe the Japanese."
"It's believed the USS Thresher or USS Scorpion (don't remember which one) took around 20 minutes to go to crush depth in it's free fall."
"My Uni mate is a navy submariner and he said that if a problem isn’t your department you just ignore it, because ultimately it either gets fixed or you die, neither of which are scenarios you can do anything about. Him and a friend were playing Fifa in their bunk when the whole sub tipped to 45 degrees. They just kept playing at 45 degrees… it got fixed eventually but they’re reactor crew so nothing they could do to help either way."
"There are places called 'body farms' were scientists and researchers look at the decomposition process of human remains in different circumstances. Basically a big area somewhere outside were human, sometimes pig corpses are laid out to be exposed to the natural elements or they're even enclosed somewhere (like the trunk of a car). They're actually important e.g. for forensic anthropology to help solve crimes. And you can donate your body for research after you die!"
Miles Longart GIFGiphy
"Your body makes blood vessels of about 7 miles in length for every pound of fat you gain. This in turn strains your heart as it has to work harder to pump blood through the new network of blood vessels."
Well there are things I never needed to know. But now we do.
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