Strike a Pose.
I was in a dance class a few years ago and we had to do improv. Everyone there was a WAY better dancer than me,so I had a difficult time just with that. Well, my teacher gave us 5 mins to come up with a dance to a whole song, and you'd have to dance in front of the class alone. I noped the hell out of there and ran and hid in the bathroom. My cell phone was still in the classroom,but at that point I didn't care. I decided to sneak out the front door of the studio. Well there's a small problem there. The walkway to the parking lot was in front of the giant windows of my classroom. I decided to just duck down and run the best I could,hoping no one saw me. I made it to the car and had my Dad run in and get my phone. Didn't go back to my class for a few weeks there.
When in doubt, pull a Tarzan!
Climbed a tree to get away from people at an outdoor party. Stayed there until everyone left and then went home.
STOP! This ain't hammer time!
It was 3rd grade. I had a presentation the next day that I really didn't want to do so I took a hammer and sat in the backyard trying to break my own ankle. I just ended up bruising it because I couldn't go full force.
Excuse me? Pardon me? Whatever works.
The other day at my small office I went to the bathroom to fix my shirt which I had worn inside out. When I went into the stall the bathroom was empty. As I flipped my shirt around someone walked into the stall next to me. I also used some toilet paper to wipe my nose (slight cold) and dropped the paper in the bowl. This triggered the auto flush sensor and it flushed. My predicament began when I realized I also had to pee, but since I had already used TP and flushed my twisted mind decided this would seem really weird to the person next door. "Why would someone use the bathroom, flush... and then stand up and pee again?" said no one ever... But I couldn't, they might recognize my shoes and know who I was.
So instead I hatched a clever deception. I left the stall and washed my hands to seem normal, despite that I hadn't even used ths bathroom. After drying I walked loudly to the exit and opened the door into the hall, then I said "oh excuse me" like I had accidentally bumped into someone else coming in, and walked right back in. I made sure to change the sound of my footsteps walking more quietly so that stall-man would think I was a different person and not some freak playing bathroom charades. Then I went to the urinal and peed and then washed my hands again, using the farthest sink so he couldn't spot my shoes.
The bathroom is always a scary place.
I once hid from my family when they came over for the holidays out of fear of interaction. I hid especially from one of my cousins who was socially aggressive and just made me really anxious. I had nowhere else to hide where there wasn't people, so I went into my bathroom and hid under the sink (I was about 8) and just planned to stay there as long as possible. My cousin (the aggressive one) came in, took a long and winded poop and then left. I just stayed there and am to this day even more terrified of interacting with him. I saw nothing but I heard.... every... sound.
Knock, knock. Whose there? I don't care.
There was a time when I would hide whenever someone unexpectedly knocked on the door. Sometimes I would literally be lying on the floor behind the couch trying not to breathe too loud in case they could hear me. I still hide occasionally, I hate people turning up without calling first.
Chew slowly!
When I was about 11, I stood in a room with my mom and her employees after an office Thanksgiving luncheon. They were chatting away about various things and we were all snacking. I took a bite of turkey and as I went to swallow it, it lodged in my throat. I kept swallowing as hard as I could but it wouldn't budge and I couldn't breathe. I didn't have a drink near me, either. So, I stood there attempting to get it down while giving NO INDICATION that I was literally choking on my food... Because I didn't want to interrupt the conversation or draw attention to myself. My vision was starting to black on the edges and I was full-on panicking inside when I finally got it swallowed down. I remember breathing heavy through my nose and my eyes watering, thinking how stupid I just was but now I DEFINITELY couldn't say anything about it.
Sometimes it feels like anxiety will kill you, sometimes it almost does.
Do I hear an echo?
When I was in middle school the teacher had us all read a chapter aloud to the class. Nervously awaiting my turn to read I started to read aloud to the class while someone else was currently reading. Not only once but three times.
What a party?
Driving to a party, sat outside of it in my car the entire time, left. Next day, said I was there.
Do I know you?
I went into a store I used to work at expecting to see my coworkers so I could greet them. A lady was there, but I had no idea what who she was. She asked me if she could help, and I stuttered a no.
Then I stood and kind of tapped my feet around like I was a tap dancer and I tried apologizing but instead said "I uh....I'm not looking for you." She looked so confused and I could feel my face getting red. I literally ran out. Not just walked quickly- ran and slammed into the door(its heavy) and hurt my arm.
Though injured, I trudged on. I heard her call out and ask if I was okay as I ran out. Now I can never go back.
Just keep walking.
Walked into a bar that was packed full of people who had all come home for Christmas to my small town. I knew everybody there. I walked in, walked through the crowd, right past my sister, and out the back door. When my sister and I saw each other, she looked at me, like, oh crap. You're freaking out I bet. She knows all about my social anxiety. She knew exactly what I had just done, and she thought it was hilarious.
I'm BLIND!!
I can't look people in the eye. If I keep eye contact longer than couple of seconds I either feel this weird vibe like the other person is looking into my soul or some weird sexual tension. Like I get the urge to make out with them. I find long eye contact to be one of the most personal things I can do with someone. And it gets really noticeable after a while, especially during drinking in mixed company.
Someone get some sage.
My roommates and I hosted a party. I wasn't having a good night, and went into my room to find two people I didn't know making out on my bed. I said,"Please leave when you're done" and went in my friend's room instead to curl up and freak out.
No one needs that much honesty.
I'm a retail cashier. A woman was buying a dress and humorously stated that she might be too fat for it. Me, never one to disagree with a customer, smiled and said, "Yup!"
I burned a few calories hitting my head on the counter after that exchange.
REPRESENTATIVE!!
I hide when I have to make important phone calls at work. I hate phoning people, yet went and got a job that required it, which is ridiculous. I'll hide my caller ID and go take a walk to calm myself down then use my mobile to call clients away from the office so nobody is listening.
Just close your eyes a minute.
I once hid under a pile of blankets to avoid talking to someone I knew was coming up to my boyfriend's apartment for a few minutes.
Gotta go, gotta go... gotta go right now!
Living with roommates at the time, I was in my bedroom and had to pee really really bad but they were having a bit of a party. I decided to stay hidden in my bedroom and pee in an empty water bottle so I didn't have to interact with people on my way to the washroom.
Use your words!
One time, I had to leave someone a voicemail. So I wrote out exactly what I had to say and read it like a script when I left the message. Something about making calls really gets me anxious and I forget what I was going to say. Or it gets jumbled. Scripts help.
Although I am better at calls now. This was years ago.
Just use your Google maps.
Walked past my classroom but didn't wanna look stupid doing a freshman 180 so I circled alllllll the way around the building, missed it again, and walked to some random restroom nearby and sat in the restroom for like 5 minutes because I didn't want people to recognize me as the dude who keeps doing laps around the Chem lab building
Don't skip meals.
My parents always bring up the time when I was 4 and we were at this Mexican restaurant. Apparently they started singing "Happy Birthday" to me, to which I smiled, but then got nervous and promptly, confidently, leaned over and bit my dad on the arm.
Check please?!
I was going leave my room to make dinner but then I heard my roommates and their friends talking outside. I didn't want to talk to them so I waited until they left and just bought take out instead.
