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Anonymous Chefs Share The Things That Customers Order That Totally Annoy Them

People can either be picky or playing themselves with their meals. And the Chefs of the world want better for us. All we have to do is listen!

Redditor BerneseMountainDogs came to these disguised helpers with a question:

Chefs of Reddit, what do we all need to stop ordering?

And the chefs answered.

Save Your Bank Account

A pepperoni passion from Domino's. If you order double pepperoni with extra cheese it's the same pizza but cheaper.

Air On The Side

Server at a vegan resturant here. A woman asked me for something on the menu with no potato or starches , no corn, no wheat, no soy, no vegan cheese, nothing processed, no added sugar, and no fruit.

I suggested a salad. A plain salad.

"I dont want a salad, thats all I have at home. When I eat out I want something different."

I dealt with multiple fussy eaters, people with crazy diets, or crazy allergies, and this was the first time I ever had to say "we cant accommodate that order, you havent given me much to work with.... maybe if you eased up on one or more restrictions...."

She just had a glass of water.

Literally

Had a group complain that their scallops "tasted like they came from the bottom of the ocean."

That's literally where scallops come from.

The Lies

My business is completely carry out, and I'd say once a month or so we get a complaint that the pizzas were cold/old looking when they picked them up.

  • They were about 160 degrees when you picked them up because we keep them in a warmer. They might be cold by the time you get home but if it's 10 degrees outside and you don't have a carry bag (we sell them for 5$) then yes your pizza will probably be a bit cooler than when you picked it up.

When you place an order, and we say it'll be ready in 20 minutes, and you are there an hour and a half later don't complain. I would rather cut my fking hand off then remake your food for you.

  • Don't lie and say you were on time, my point of sale logs order placed and picked up times, it's also on your receipt, oh you lost your receipt, well you can come by and pick another one up, no, a copy of your receipt, I'm not remaking your food.

An Oyster Of A Problem

People that have to order sh-t done a specific way and then b-tch about it. I can give you a list:

Lady ordered chicken schnitzel but didn't want it deep fried so she wanted it grilled. So she got her breaded grilled chicken and complained that it was bland.

Guy didn't want his calamari deep fried because he was on a diet, so we pan friend it in minimal oil and he complained because it didn't look as good.

Lady ordered truffle sauce, complained because it was "too strong".

And my personal favourite.... a couple complained because their kilpatrick oysters were "warm and slimy". Firstly have you ever eaten an oyster? And it f-cking should be warm, it just came from under the grill.

Non-Menu Items

It's not on the menu but can you whip me up a dragon fruit gyoza in a cloud layer of elemental darkness served in a ham tambourine? It's my birthday so you have to do it.

I'm A Different Chef

"I like that dish insert any tv chef did at that tv show, what it was called?" if you want Gordon Ramsay fantasy course, please go to one of his restaurants.

A Soupy Situation

As an unlicensed, but professional short order cook; I ask you all to reconsider trying our soup! Rather than what not to order, I feel all the places I worked at I always had the ability to load up the soups with whatever I wanted. I AM THE SOUP KING.

Break; Fast

Things that are impossible or a contradiction aka eggs over easy, hard yolk. What!?

I work at a breakfast place, and I have seen the most bizarre ways to order eggs...

Just Be Honest

Order whatever you like. Stop telling the wait staff your sensitivity or preference is an "allergy". There is a whole giant cleaning and safety operation that takes place when we get an allergy, and we have to treat every one seriously because we don't know. The number of times people with dairy "allergies" put milk in their coffee after their meal, tell us about nut allergies when ordering dessert after eating the rest of their meal that had nuts in It, or upon being told they could not have a modified version of a dish without shellfish respond with "ill have it anyway, it's not serious."

Not to even mention things like "allergies" to -melted cheese specifically -dark meat but not white meat from a chicken -any eggs that aren't scrambled -peppers but paprika is fine -very serious gluten allergy that will cause extreme pain to the unfortunate patron, who is chugging down his 3rd pint of double IPA.

I could go on.

Just say you don't like it and we won't put it in there. We want you to enjoy your meal. I work 14 hour days to cook people good food as best I can. I want you to be happy, I promise. Lying is disrespectful.

For Real, JUST. BE. HONEST.

Not a chef, was a waitress, but if you don't know what an ingredient is, please ask. Especially if you have dietary requirements.

I got screamed at by a vegetarian couple because I "made them" eat meat for the first time in 15 years. They ordered the pea and pancetta soup, without knowing what pancetta was, and without telling me they were vegetarians. I was expected to somehow read their minds and know they were vegetarian and warn them.

Oh No.

Former Steak N Shake cook here: the 7 X 7 burger. 7 patties with 7 slices of cheese stacked on top of eachother on a bun. A pain to make and an easy way to cardiac arrest increase your waistline and damage your digestive tract.

There was so much grease that we had to leave the stack of patties and cheese to drain on a different plate first so that it wouldn't turn the bun into a new state of matter between solid and liquid (the comments have informed me that it's called a colloid).

By the way, one person cooks all the patties, two on rush hours. Zero to two more add condiments. That person may not make a penny over minimum wage and never gets tipped.

Parasites

Swordfish...all fish can have parasitic worms. But swordfish can be riddled with them. Let's just say it's pretty unappetizing.

Two-Steak

I used to work at an irish pub 7 years ago. We had a bud spud and steak (Get a beer, get a potato and get a steak for like 10 bucks for a fundraiser)

Someone attended and asked for a half steak well done, and half rare/medium rare but she didnt want it cut in half, wanted the steak whole.

I was able to KINDA do it (Half the steak was hanging off the side of the grill, cooking each side one at a time) but she sent it back, wasnt cooked right.... Boss got mad at me cause I didnt cook the steak two different ways right.....

Planet What

This is highly dependant on the quality of the restaurant, but a good rule of thumb is not to order stuff that is out of character with the rest of the menu.

Every restaurant menu has a general theme to their food. That could be based on region or dietary limitations or main course (steakhouse for example) or whatever.

A lot of places will also have a couple of things that break that theme so the picky eaters in the group have something to order. That stuff will often be made with older ingredients, and by people who aren't used to making it since it comes up so rarely in a night.

Just Let Me Be

Stop trying to make your own dish out of our ingredients. I have no problem with substitutions, sauce on the side, etc. But if you come in and say "can I have this dish... But i want this instead of this, this instead of this, and can you serve it as part of a salad?" then that's not ok.

It's one thing to work around an ingredient you don't like, but it's another to treat the kitchen as your pantry. Dishes are designed the way they are on purpose. If you mess with that formula too much, we're no longer responsible for your food tasting good or not.

Celiacs, Beware...

Stop ordering dishes that aren't promoted as being gluten free in the first place, if you actually aren't gluten intolerant. The dishes that are marked as gluten free are prepared so that absolutely no contamination will occur. If a dish is not gluten free and you ask for it to be, it will halt all production in the kitchen until your dish is done. And sometimes you won't get the exact dish because of prep work on ingredients, which might involve being in contact with gluten.

Cheating Yourself

20$+ salads, unless it's got some fantastic protein component to it. It's just not worth the money; buy the ingredients for <10$ and make it yourself.

Don't get me wrong, salads can be delicious and well worth ordering, but don't pay entree prices some lettuce and fruit.

Example: I used to work at a popular patio restaurant right in the middle of a rich, beautiful part of town. Due to the location and the general swagger of the place, we knew we could charge 24$ for this strawberry goat cheese salad in the summer, and we hyped the fact that it was "gluten free". Food cost for it was maybe 4$, prep time negligible, execution time <1 minute, so the margin on these things was just insane. I swear, every time summer rolled around, we made more money from girls in their early 20s ordering that salad than we made on booze.

Oh, and don't forget to add 3.5oz of chicken for 9$.

Just Use Your Menu

Don't order something that's not on the menu, even if you've had it there before. Cooks set up their stations very specifically in order to efficiently cook what's on the menu. Ordering something you saw on tv or ordering a past menu item means we have to stop cooking and prep the ingredients for you meal which screws up our rhythm. If you don't want what's on the menu, go to a different restaurant.

Recap

So to sum it all up:

  • Don't order 30 minutes before close

Be respectful to your waiters and waitresses

  • Don't try to mix and match the menu to make your own concoction

If you're in Argentina, just order the steak and not seafood

  • Don't try to re-invent phrases for how you like your food. Rare Plus doesn't exist....medium rare, does.

Image by Foundry Co from Pixabay

Now that college has become a standard requirement for so many jobs and careers, there is a massive push by high schools to get their graduating students accepted and enrolled at an undergraduate college.

On the whole, that's undoubtedly a great thing. A more educated workforce will be prepared to solve the most complex issues facing human beings in the next several decades.

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Image by Gianni Crestani from Pixabay

*The following article contains discussion of suicide/self-harm.

The person on the other end of a 911 call has a truly remarkable job.

For those who don't play that professional role, we hope to never encounter the 911 call interaction. But if we do find ourselves making that call, the moment is an anomaly in our lives.

The chaos, the panic, the racing heart, and the desperation are all emotions we, ideally, don't experience on a regular basis.

But for the operator on the other end, our call is one in a long line of calls they've received all day, and all the workdays before that one.

It's difficult to imagine being embedded in those uniquely urgent, emergency moments all the time.

Some Redditors who are on the other end of that call shared their experiences on the job.

WhimsicalxxButcher asked, "911 dispatchers what has been your most creepy/unnerving call?"

For a few, the most unnerving moments were the calm callers.

There was something just so eerie about how level-headed the faceless human being on the other end could be through such a desperate, tragic moment.

Almost Clinical 

"I had a friend who worked as a 911 dispatcher and he always said the worst call he ever had was a ~20 year old kid who committed suicide by mixing a bunch of chemicals together in his car to produce hydrogen sulfide gas."

"He said that the most unnerving part was hearing him calmly listing off the chemicals, the type of gas produced, and the effects of hydrogen sulfide on the body (namely the almost instant death it causes at high concentrations)."

"He ended the call by providing the address of the parking lot he was in and saying that nobody should approach the vehicle without hazmat equipment."

"Apparently after that there was a whooshing sound as he dumped the last chemical into the mix, and then the line went dead silent aside for a quiet fizzing noise."

"I know that call screwed him up because he almost never talks about stuff that happens to him on the job. He quit a few months later to go into construction management, and frankly I can't blame him."

-- iunoyou

Planned Out 

"A woman called me, saying she was going to kill herself. She was gassing herself. Gave me her name & address then said she was just going to lie down and 'go to sleep.' And stopped responding to me."

"I kept the line open, trying to get her to speak to me, and eventually heard officers forcing their way in to find her body. I guess she just wanted someone to find her body."

-- mozgw4

Before It Set In 

"When I got a call from a 6 year old who got home from school and laid down to take a nap with his dad. His dad never woke up."

"The kid was so calm when calling it broke my heart."

"I ended up leaving dispatch shortly after. I was good at compartmentalizing the job for the year I was doing it, but it would've broken me in the long run."

-- tasha7712

Other 911 operators were unfortunate enough to receive a call from the very last person they wanted to hear from: a loved one.

These dispatchers' unique position gave them the unexpected access to a family member or friend at their most dire moments.

No More of That 

"My family member is a long time first responder, and 'retired' into doing dispatch. He heard the address (someone else was taking the call) and realized it was his daughter's house."

"He rushed over there just in time to see them wheeling her body out. Overdose."

"Five months later, he was called to his ex-wife's place because his grandson (son of the daughter who recently passed) had his door locked, lights on, but wasn't responding to his grandma."

"He broke the door down and found him deceased in bed. Overdose."

"He's very stoic after years of all sorts of traumatic situations but my heart hurts whenever I think of what all of this must have felt like. Like sand through your fingers."

-- bitchyhouseplant

Knowing the Address

"Not me, but my grandma. I was sitting in the dispatch office, (very small one only 2 dispatchers including my grandma) but she put out a dispatch that there was a gun shot from my best friends address."

"My heart sank to my stomach and broke later that day. He committed suicide."

-- OntaiSenpuu

When it Happened 

"My uncle passing away. Worked as a small town dispatcher for a year or so. Had a bunch of messed up stuff happen on shift, but this call came in in the still hours of the night. Small town, so not many calls after midnight."

"I answered and recognized the name and address on caller id. Aunt was in a frenzy so didn't recognize my voice. I remained calm and got ems and fire rolling to them, but by my aunt's own words he was already blue."

"I went thru debriefing and mandated therapy for a couple other things that happened, but never really talked to anyone about this. I just try not to think about it."

"That was the call I figured out I needed to find a different job."

-- dangitjon

Finally, some simply had a front row seat to sudden tragedy.

These operators were flies on the wall when disaster struck. They never asked to witness what they witnessed, but sometimes that came with the territory.

A Holiday Tragedy 

"My mom is a 911 dispatcher. Early on she said one Christmas Eve while working she got a call from an elderly lady who's husband had just collapsed(and died) from a heart attack and in the background Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas music was playing on blast."

"The lady was screaming and crying and begging for her husband to wake up but my mom could hear his gurgling in his last breathes. She doesn't listen to or watch Alvin and the chipmunks since."

-- Blueflowerbluehair

What is it About Christmas?

"Christmas night. 911 call with crying child on the other end. A neighbor had run her car over her mom during a domestic."

"The mom crawled to the porch bleeding and the child saw the car coming back. I had her hide quietly in a closet with the cordless phone."

"The 10 year old child was crying and screamed that she hated Christmas. She was afraid of the police when they got there."

"I kept her on the phone until she felt safe enough to give the phone to an officer. I almost fainted after that call was over. Had nightmares for a while."

-- 2FunBoofer

Close to Home 

"Not a dispatcher but I handle radio communications for the Coast Guard. One night I was on the radio and got a call from an 11 year old kid whose boat had started to sink. He was out with his dad and 6 year old brother."

"They had been hit by another boat and his father got knocked unconscious. I remember the entire conversation up until the radio had gone underwater."

"They ended up finding his dad floating on his back alive but the two boys didn't make it. That one really fu**ed with me because my two littlest brothers were around the same age as the youngest."

-- HIRSH2243

A Horrible Clock 

"Another one that stays with me was the man who called in. It was the anniversary of his adult son having hanged himself. He'd now come home to find his wife had done the same."

"That date is always going to be a black day for him."

-- mozgw4


If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/

Again, we hope you never have to use the 911 call in your life. Nobody wants to be involved in a sudden emergency or a tragic incident.

But hopefully, if you do, an operator like one of these thoughtful, sensitive Redditors is on the other end.

Image by Nguyen Dinh Lich from Pixabay

When I was moving on from middle school to high school my parents had me tested for the "gifted" program. By some miracle I passed and was accepted. And then I turned it down. Everyone was irritated. "This will pave the way for any college you want! You'll learn so much!" his path will set you up for life!" Every adult tried valiantly to sell me this merchandise but in my gut I just wasn't buying it. So I "settled" a level below, merely advanced classes. And upon reflection... it was the best choice I ever made.

Redditor u/dauntlessdaisy was wondering how far some in life got by asking... For those of you who were considered "gifted" in school, what are you doing with your life now?
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Image by Markus Spiske from Pixabay

There's a million things that can happen to you while out on on the road.

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