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People Explain Which Animals Many Believe Are Harmless But Are Actually Quite Dangerous

People Explain Which Animals Many Believe Are Harmless But Are Actually Quite Dangerous
Finn Mund/Unsplash

Chickens. Are. Terrifying.

If you think "chickens" and think of flighty, cowardly animals, it's clear you've never actually met them.

They're mean. They're bloodthirsty. They've killed people.

Nature made them small and delicious so we'd eat them and give ourselves a fighting chance against these New World Velociraptors.


Reddit user Click-bayt1025 assked:

"What’s an animal everyone thinks is harmless but in reality is very dangerous?"

... we should probably be very afraid.

Bye-Son

"Bison, every year someone gets hurt or killed in Yellowstone because they think the bison are slow and dumb and you can take selfies with them."

"Really they are quick and powerful, but have poor eyesight. As you approach a bison it may not see you until you are close, then it can panic and gore you."

- Riverrat423

"People really treat Yellowstone like a petting zoo. Seen many videos of people being flipped into the air like ragdolls."

"Also the kid who got his chin gored because the family had the windows down"

- chiefs_fan37


"I legit cannot fathom seeing an animal as massive as a bison and assuming it’s safe to approach."

- aliceroyal

"It seems like there’s more stories coming out from Yellowstone about people getting killed or critically injured by Buffalo because they’re getting to close to them."

- shrimpsauce91

"The stupidest sh*t I ever saw in my life was the tourist I saw in Yellowstone tiptoeing through a thermal area (where the earth/crust is really thin and barely covers deep pools of boiling hot acidic water) with his camera to get closer to a bison and its calf to take a photo."

"Dude must have had a death wish."

- g-a-r-n-e-t

Giphy

Cone Snail

"Cone snails."

"You see their shells decorating bathrooms all the time. But find a live one and make the mistake handling it and it will lance you with a venomous harpoon."

"For several species, such as the geography cone, this venom is sufficent to swiftly kill a human."

- Trips-Over-Tail

"Definitely snails. Certain fresh water snails carry parasitic worms that in turn carry a deadly disease known as schistosomiasis. When humans come into contact with water where these snails live they can become infected and die of organ failure."

"In sub-Saharan Africa, schistosomiasis is the second leading cause of death after malaria, with more than 200,000"

- elizletcher

"There's one species of cone snail nicknamed "cigarette snail" because the time their venom takes to kill you is about as much as it takes to smoke a cigarette."

- WeirdStray

"This is the answer I was looking for. I'll never forget reading about this as a kid and being surprised they can harpoon people and kill them while they collect shells."

- Rhodri_Suojelija

Giphy

Donkey

"Donkeys although they look innocent but they have nasty kicks and bites"

- musanifshah3010

"Anybody that thinks donkeys aren't terrifying should see what happens when they get a hold of a coyote."

- mgj6818

"They have wild donkeys near Lake Pleasant. I camped there one time and I just heard this mean ass beast in the bushes—we were scared. I got up some courage and went to go look and it was just a really mean donkey."

- xXSpaceturdXx

"And even if you somehow defeat one, you'll have to fight its pissed off dragon wife next"

- P1SSY3LL0W


"Used to work near wild Burros. A lot of those Burros had scars on their backs from when a mountain lions attempted to take them down."

"Attempted, being the key word there. Saw one with a bad eye, one ear, scarred up back, and no fear in its one good eye. Of me or my SUV."

- 2DamnBig

"Donkeys are smart tho, really just don’t get on their territory unless you live their or they allow it."

"We had few and they all had different jobs. Those that moved stuff from the farm to the sorting room knew the way around the farm. We load them up and they go drop it and come back and eat a treat."

"They knew when guests are coming and would guide our herd of sheep to the other side of the farm."

"Kept our sheep protected at night.""

"Just take care of them, feed them, shelter them, and clean them. That’s all they ask for and they are loyal."

"Also let them be them. They like to run around or just lay down and do nothing, they got amazing personalities."

- momo88852

Giphy

Big Big Birds

"Not everyone but I see a few people get dangerously close to big birds like hawks and eagles. I'm like, people, those birds almost got bigger claws than bears, leave them alone."

- TheShadowOfKaos

"I work with them quite often and yeah, if you don’t know what you are doing and how to properly handle them it can be very very dangerous."

"Also people letting their little tiny rabbit sized dogs walk off leash in areas where I know there are raptors drives me mad. There’s no way you’d be able to save your dog if one decided they looked like a good meal."

- chamomilehoneywhisk


"I once rescued an adult redtail hawk with a broken wing. Having to catch her up was very scary - she flopped on her back, talons up, ready to grab me."

"Luckily I was able to cover her head and grab her legs."

"Most people, if they have the sense to be afraid of raptors, fear being bitten. Nah, the beak isn't the primary weapon, those talons are!"

- sainsa

"I went on a falconry experience once, had a golden eagle on my arm which was super tame and chill, and it was still terrifying. When it jumped off my arm to take off the force sent my arm downwards about 45 degrees."

- godoflemmings

Giphy

Timon

"My uncle is a zoologist and the only animal he was ever attacked by was a meerkat."

- doej0

"I’m a zoo volunteer, got bitten by a meerkat a few months ago. It just darted up and bit my finger for no reason, little jerk. They are FAST."

- Sleeplesshelley

"Small animals like that come preprogrammed with the rage of 1,000 demons."

- kendrahf

"Meerkats also have the highest environmental risk factor of any potentially escaped animal. They'll breed and dig until theyve reached carrying capacity, destroying root systems and creating deserts wherever they go."

"If you wanna cripple a nation's food supply, just drop in a few horny meerkats."

- fuckasssss

"The only scar I got from working with animals was from a meerkat, didn’t give her her chicken fast enough 🥲"

- tribblemethis

Giphy

Beavers

"Beware of Beavers!"

"Beavers will stand their ground and confront a threat. If trapped, cornered, or ensnatched, a beaver will attack a human."

"The rodents' sharp teeth may cause serious injury as well as infection. Beavers carry tularemia, parasites, and rabies, which can transfer through bites, body fluids, or infected water."

"Before beavers attack humans or other animals, they send a warning by growling and hissing. On land, the animal rises to its hind legs to face a threat. In the water, a startled beaver slaps its tail against the surface to alert others in the colony before diving to safety."

- Back2Bach

"I've heard a beaver slap its tail in the water before. You'd think someone just fired a shotgun at you!"

- mikeybab123

"I had a beaver shadow me for about a half mile while I was wade fishing a small river. Whenever I stopped to fish, it swam within about 15 feet from me and slapped its tail against the water."

"So I would move farther downstream, but it would just repeat the process. It was probably protecting little ones, but finally I got so unnerved I decided that was enough fishing for one day."

- twisted_stepsister


"Nickelodeon was right. Those beavers are Angry Beavers."

- FM1091

"When I was in highschool, me and my buddies were walking along the river bank one night and I heard rustling in the tall grass up the bank. Being a very stupid teenager, I pulled the grass to the sides like a cartoon character and put my face right in there."

"I saw two large, shiny, black marbles and a yellow coffee mug. When my eyes adjusted to the light, I made out a toaster oven-sized beaver with MASSIVE yellow teeth."

"We started at each other, frozen in fear for what felt like a lifetime when I slowly closed the opening in the grass and backed out before strolling away. It was a total Scooby Doo moment."

"I didn't tell my friends until we were well away so they didn't go back and disturb it because I didn't how dangerous a beaver could be."

- Broosevelt

Giphy

All-around MVPredator

"dragon flies, but not to people. I went off the beaten path hiking around an old slate town and there was a lot of horse/deer flies buzzing around attacking me. I Came across the edge of a huge beaver pond that hasn't really been touched by humans in 100+ years."

"As soon as I get to the marshy beach all the sudden i see these little flashes of black zooming around my head and all of the flies are gone these fuckin dragon flies came in and took them all out in a matter of seconds mid god damn flight."

- Outnabout3535325

"Dragonflies are really good predators. They are the perfect flying machines"

- gandalfium225

"Dragonflies actually have the highest kill ratio of any animal"

"I don't remember the exact stat, but its over 90% of the time they hit their target."

- Gasp32


"Dragonflies are vicious, vicious predators. Something like 95% success rate at hunting, they can fly up to 30 mph, and are ridiculously agile, about to fly up, down, left, right, forwards and backwards, and can hover."

- Dorgamund

"Yeah, they will pick them right off your skin while in mid-bite. When I was working in a forest we used to go to bridge over a water way in the evening to get some relief from the bugs. The relief was an airforce of dragon flies feasting on those bastards."

- socialism-scientific

"As an avid outdoorsman, I regularly plan trips to certain areas based upon predictions and reports about whether dragonflies are out yet that year."

"They are true friends of the outdoors enthusiast."

"But they do, in fact, pack a nasty bite if they so choose to use it. Usually they don't, but I've been bitten by them before and it hurts like f*cking hell. I still love them."

- flargenhargen

"The real heroes."

- Dark_Vengence

Giphy

Flippin Flipper

"Dolphins. Those things can be little psychopaths."

- AgentAwesome2008

"Came here for this. The biggest rapists and druggies on the planet"

- LordChaos404

"Little meat torpedoes that can weigh over half a ton, bite like crocodiles and sometimes find humans sexually attractive."

- Nephilims_Dagger


"YES!! One bit me at Sea World, I thought it was an accident because it was a feeding tank but he turned around and BIT ME AGAIN."

"Tons of other kids were standing there, that bottle nosed bastard targeted me!"

"I don’t blame it though, poor guy living in captivity."

- Fishbate333

Giphy

Careful With The Fedora

"Platypus. The males have a big venom spike on their back legs, which is intensely painful."

"This sounds like a joke, but it’s absolutely true."

- IncredulousPulp

"Platypus is an animal that makes so little sense the first person to send one back to Europe was labeled a fraud."

"Like other monotremes, it senses prey through electrolocation. It is one of the few species of venomous mammals, as the male platypus has a spur on the hind foot that delivers a venom, capable of causing severe pain to humans. The unusual appearance of this egg-laying, duck-billed, beaver-tailed, otter-footed mammal baffled European naturalists when they first encountered it, and the first scientists to examine a preserved platypus body (in 1799) judged it a fake, made of several animals sewn together.[5]" -Wikipedia"

- shwaga

"They are also surprisingly fast at chasing you on land, and it's looks hilarious until they catch you"

- Deadlybutterknife


"I also heard they make for a great secret agent…"

- Mecha106

"Their venom is so painful infact morphine can't even touch it. You have to pinch off the nerves thus fully numbing the area to find relief from the pain."

- The_Book-JDP

"HE’S A SEMI-AQUATIC EGG-LAYING MAMMAL OF ACTION!"

- FinniboiXD

"I saw a segment from a documentary series about stings and bites once. This guy grabbed a platypus by accident because he was trying to grab hold of a log. It spurred his hand and caused him excruciating pain. At the hospital, the doctors had to figure out how to stop the pain because they had given him so much morphine that anymore would have been dangerous, and it had little to no effect on the pain."

"They were able to figure something out, but it took several months for the guy to be able to fully use that hand again."

- CelticGaelic

"The platypus is nature's way of saying "I made this thing out of spare parts I found lying around the workshop and it can still f*cking cripple you."

- Hypersapien

"But the females can sweat milk"

- Easthwestnorth

Giphy

Pigs

"Pigs, people thinks they are harmless packs of bacon but in reality they can easily kill you if annoyed"

- clari_man

"There's a reason everyone on the farm in Wizard of Oz freaked out when Dorothy fell into the pigpen in the beginning."

- WineAndDogs2020

"And they are omnivorous. They will eat you, if they have the chance."

- Apotak

"My grandparents always kept animals and my grandmother grew up on a farm. She was always the most afraid of the pigs and always said as much. Pigs are dangerous and can be quiet a bit larger then people imagine."

- thiswilltakeamiracle

"My aunt tripped one day feeding her pig, he was on her in a second. She managed to drag herself partially upright while he tried to get a good grip on her legs and grab the ballpeen hammer hanging on the side of the barn. She ended up having to smash his skull in while he was trying to crush/eat her."

"I can't imagine how terrified she was and I'm so happy she was able to pull herself up enough to grab the hammer"

- MossyDwarf

Giphy

Are you feeling suddenly uncomfortable in the food chain?

Us too.

People Share Their Very Specific Dating Restrictions

Reddit user AceofSpadesYT asked: 'What is your most specific restriction when it comes to dating?'

silhouette photography of couple
Sean Stratton on Unsplash

When it comes to dating, I have my mental checklist. The guy must be kind, intelligent, funny, and a movie buff. He must be adventurous but also doesn't mind a Netflix and Chill date night.

Most of this is similar to the mental checklists other people have. Of course, I can be flexible. If someone is nice and I'm having fun with them, they don't necessarily have to check all the boxes.

However, I have one specific dating restriction that is a dealbreaker regardless of how many boxes the person checks, and that's religion. I've never been a fan, and now I'm an atheist, and I would want my partner to be as well. That's because I want kids, and the last thing I want is for us to argue about how to raise the kids when it comes to religion.

I'm not the only person who has one specific dating restriction. Everyone has that one thing that is a dealbreaker when it comes to a romantic relationship. Redditors certainly do, and they are ready to share.

It all started when Redditor AceofSpadesYT asked:

"What is your most specific restriction when it comes to dating?"

It's Just A Joke!

"No cruel or rude pranks."

– detective_kiara

"I saw a post by someone whose boyfriend "pranked" her by pretending to be dead on the kitchen floor. That is exactly how she had found her previous partner, dead on the kitchen floor, which her current boyfriend knew. He was surprised she dumped him and didn't think it was funny."

– innocuousspeculation

We're (Not) Gonna Party!

"No party people. Nothing wrong with it, I just ain't dealing with that sh*t."

– PlantBasedStangl

"True. I like planning weekend stuff, but it has to be something meaningful - visiting a different city, movie marathon, mountain hike, fancy lunch, all okay. But... clubbing and drinking? How f**king old are we, 19? No thank you, I'm old and have no energy for listening to music I don't like while being surrounded by 50 people that I don't give a single half of a sh*t about."

– PlantBasedStangl

LOL

"Same sense of humor. I have 0 interest sharing physical space with someone who doesn't laugh with me."

– Legendary_Lamb2020

My Ears Are Bleeding!

"I'm a light sleeper. I cannot date a snorer. I can hear snores through ear plugs AND a fan blowing. It's not you, it's me."

– YourLocalOrca

At that point, it does sound like them 😂

– CuriousRedditor98

Funemployed

"Have a f**king job."

– Cuss-Mustard

"Found this difficult when I was funemployed. Was fortunate enough to be able to live off savings for a bit."

"People reacted oddly to it. “But what do you do???”"

"Was dating at the same time and some girls had the same sentiment. “You don’t have a job?”"

"I had a good enough job that I didn’t need one anymore. And one lined up 8 months from then. But there were two girls specifically who treated it as a deal breaker."

– DigNitty

"I had a similar situation. I worked a high-paying job for a few years that demanded a ton of my time and had crazy hours. It burnt me out badly and I lived off of the savings from that job for a while and tried to date now that I actually had free time. I had more money in my bank account during that time than at any other point in my life but so many people were put off by me being funemployed and assumed I was looking to leech. But I guess there’s really no way to know someone's history and hard not to assume. Now I work full-time and have way less money overall but it looks better..."

– Pinsit

Just Breathe

"No smoking. Ever. I'm not kissing an ashtray, or smelling an ashtray. Instant turn off."

–fishfood19

"100% I broke up with an old gf because she started smoking behind my back knowing I’ve got asthma and it was always a hard pass. She thought I was joking but it showed me that she was also untrustworthy."

– Jonowl89

That'll Do It

"I guess my husband restricts my dating."

– HeinousEncephalon

"My wife has the same rule. But the jokes on her, I get around it by dating her!"

– AuralRapist

Prehistoric Love

"Must like dinosaurs."

– Grungeceratops

"That goes without saying."

– Plain_Chacalaca

What's In A Name?

"Cannot have the same name as any of my relatives."

– Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

"My last ex had the same name as my Dad and I reeeeeeaally didn't like it. So, fair."

– severaltalkingducks

Be Polite

"If they’re rude to people they’ll never see again (Waitstaff, cashiers, etc) I’m out."

"I can’t respect anyone who doesn’t respect themselves, and when you’re not polite to people you’re disrespecting yourself."

– OctopusCandleCompany

God Only Knows

"When I was dating, you had to be an atheist. I don't mess with religion. And I genuinely just don't think atheists + religious people work out."

"And I know... There's going to be someone who comments (assuming there are enough upvotes) who says "I worked out with my spouse who's religious and I'm not!" but you're the exception. When it comes to making decisions long-term, how to spend your money, where you think you'll go after you die, not to mention basic morality (!), and if you have children - that's a huge hurdle."

– Lulu_42

"We worked it out. It's absolutely an exception and not the rule. Don't do it if you can avoid it."

– Alcoraiden

Let's Move Tonight (Literally)

"They need to be ok with cold weather."

"I grew up in the north, live in the south, and I'm tolerating it until I can move back north. If someone says they hate the cold it's an instant turn-off because I don't want to drag someone into a climate they hate."

"The same thing also applies to walkability. I want to move somewhere walkable, and I hope to meet someone with that same goal rather than try to talk them into it."

– ThePresidentCantSwim

"Let me know when you find this mythical northern walkable community."

– Partner-Elijah

My Purr-fect Match

"Cat has to approve."

– Possible-Source-2454

Non-Negotiable

"They need to be male. Kind of important."

– RMHaney

"So weird, I want the complete opposite."

– eightvo

Yeah, the male thing is kind of important for me too!

Do you have anything to add? Let us know in the comments.

Person cooking in home kitchen
Conscious Design on Unsplash

We've all heard the phrase, "You can't eat at everybody's house," but some of us have a few examples of our own to live by.

From not properly cleaning the environment to questionable hygiene ourselves, there are countless reasons why a person may not want to eat what you've cooked after watching you prepare it.

Bracing themselves, Redditor 195901 asked:

"What is your 'you can't eat at everybody's house' horror story?"

Fly Spray Sandwiches

"I told my dad my sandwich tasted like fly spray at my grandma's house. He didn’t believe me."

"Two days later, I caught my grandma spraying the benches 'clean' with the two-dollar fly spray you find at the cheap store."

"Dad figured it was safe to make sandwiches straight on the countertop because they looked clean. I dragged him over to see and he apologized and took my sister and me for fish and chips for lunch."

- littlehungrygiraffe

Special Seasoning Deviled Eggs

"My crackpot aunt served us a lovely tray of deviled eggs, complete with very old paprika sprinkled on top. So old, in fact, the many weevils mixed in it were dead."

- PhoneboothLynn

A Disturbing Surprise

"I visited a friend's house who was living with his mother, and she asked if I wanted a coffee and I said I would."

"Upon getting to the bottom of the cup and taking the last few gulps, I found there was a used bandaid stuck to the bottom… I never ate or drank there again."

- MrRailton

In Need of Child Protective Services

"I was babysitting a kid in a pretty dirty house. I was told to wake him up, supervise bathing and changing clothes, and feed him. I was welcome to whatever was in the fridge. Okay. The house and his clothes were filthy."

"Then, when I opened the cabinets, floods of roaches poured out. There were roaches in every opened box and container."

"I took him back to my house and returned him later that day. I hope the boy ended up in a better situation. I found out CPS (Child Protective Services) got involved shortly after."

- Alltheprettydresses

Traumatized by Raisins

"I was gonna complain about raisins in the potato salad but the other comments on here are scary. Oh my god."

- tcumber

"When I was a young kid, I stayed over at a friend's place, and his mom made veal or something with godd**n raisins INSIDE the meat somehow. It was so nasty, I never forgot it."

- User2716057

You WISH That Was Vinegar

"My MIL fished around in the green bin (compost bin) with her bare hands, didn't wash them, WIPED her GARBAGE JUICE HANDS on the tea towel, and then WENT BACK TO PREPPING THE SALAD."

"She also got horrifically offended if I didn't want to eat at her house."

- 116843189

Poor Home Hygiene

"My first boyfriend’s parents invited me for Thanksgiving. I came over a few days before Christmas and all the same dirty dishes from Thanksgiving were still in the kitchen. I passed on coming over for Christmas dinner."

- MinimalistHomestead

Every Surface Covered

"I went to a friend's house after school, he was going to teach a group of us to play D&D (Dungeons and Dragons)."

"We got there and his house was disgusting. I'm not the neatest person but the carpet hadn't been vacuumed in forever, clothes were all over the place, and dirty dishes were stacked everywhere."

"I tried to be polite even though the place reeked, but at some point, he was like, 'Who wants snacks!'"

"He picked up a bowl that was crusted with stuff, splashed in some water, wiped it with a towel that clearly hadn't been washed that decade, and poured chips into it. Then he asked if we wanted to stay for dinner. We did not."

- KnittinAndB***hin

O Holy Expiration Dates

"When I was a kid, Christmas Eve was always celebrated at Grandma's. I always got sick afterward. Like, Merry Christmas, you're going to puke now."

"It wasn't until I was all grown up and helping her out in the last weeks of her life that I learned why. She did not believe in expiration dates on anything!"

- SundayMorningTrisha

An Immune System to Remember

"My grandma made me a food phobic from a young age. Whether it was ramen with moths floating on top, or chunky milk in my cereal, it just scarred me for life."

"Dinner at her house was always a fight. Not eating her food was not an option. I'm not sure why that was the hill she would always choose to die on, because she was an amazing grandma other than this."

"Expiration dates aren't a thing. If the cheese was moldy, you cut it off... I think living through the great depression and raising kids in poverty changed her mindset on food."

"I mean obviously, she's doing something right because she's 91. She must have the immunity of a superhero."

- tha_stormin_mormon

Neighborly Love

"I used to help an old neighbor out with grocery shopping, I’d drop the bags at her door and she’d give me a check for the amount of groceries. She’d give me homemade cookies once in a while, chocolate chips."

"I didn’t ever eat them because one time I caught sight of her apartment. It was a large studio, a small kitchen, and tv, and a bed/couch. And there were about 20 cans of cat food, half-eaten, and one million flies and small maggots in different stages of growth, dishes with crusty food stuck to them, and a wall of empty beer cans."

"After I saw that, and got a whiff of her apartment, I started helping her with taking garbage out and putting groceries away, cleaning out her fridge, and making sure her cat was healthy."

"A couple of months later, she got the virus, ended up at a rehab facility, and passed within two weeks."

"Some people need help and a little company…"

- SnooPeripherals6557

No Longer Rice

"A girl I was interested in at the time had cats. I came to her house one day to pick her up for a date and he had a large sack of rice open in her pantry with the pantry door open."

"One of the cats hopped out of the sack of rice and she just casually laughed at it like, 'Oh, they are always getting into things.'"

"I came over the following weekend that SAME sack of rice was in the pantry and I could hear one of them tussling around in it again, we stopped dating sometime after that but anytime she offered to cook for me I immediately pivoted to taking her out to eat instead."

- justad**nfool

"Those cats probably used it as litter."

- Anonymanx

"Yeah, that was my fear."

- justad**nfool

Could Have Warned Her

"My mom told me one about going over to her aunt Virginia's house. She, her parents, and her siblings were sat around the kitchen while her aunt cooked, and my mom could not figure out why no one else was having ANY of this incredibly delicious bread that was on the table."

"She was on her third slice when her aunt stepped out to do something else, and my mom was told by her brother to go look in the flour bin."

"It was absolutely filled with miller moth larvae. Aunt Virginia had been losing her eyesight for years."

- smoothiefruit

"It's f**ked of her parents not to warn her not to eat the bread... like, what the f**k, you KNOW the bread isn't safe, so you're not eating it, but you're fine with letting your daughter have three slices?"

- whydontthissitework

Bad to the Point of Malnutrition

"I graduated high school at 6' 10" tall, but weighing only 120 pounds."

"That's not skinny, that's emaciated."

"The food prepared by my bio-mom was so bad that it wasn't providing me with the nutrients or calories I needed to survive. I went off to college where I had to cook for myself (I wasn't allowed to cook at home because my father insisted that "cooking was women's work")."

"Not only did I discover that food didn't have to be burnt to a crisp, flavorless, or boiled until everything was grey. I also discovered that food can be made to taste good, and using things like salt, or pepper, spices, or various condiments can make it taste amazing."

"The "freshman 15" likely saved my life."

"The thing is, I don't think that my biomom was even aware that her food was that disgusting. Whenever we went out for dinner (which was more often than what my father wanted, but he was the one who insisted on going), she did nothing but complain about how the food was undercooked, 'practically raw,' or 'too spicy,' to eat."

"When she went to other people's houses (including her own extended family) she would criticize them for 'doing it wrong' when she watched them cook anything. She would often end up refusing to eat their food because she 'watched them ruin it,' when they cooked it. We never had guests over to eat her cooking. Ever."

- Galaxy_Ranger_Bob

Clean Hands

"We have a chili contest every year at work around Thanksgiving and I've stopped participating in voting for it because I want to know whose I'm eating before taking any. I work with some great people, but I wouldn't eat at or anything from their house. Strangely enough, the guy I absolutely despise I'll gladly eat his chili because he is clean and well kept and I know his house is."

"I also work with a bunch of people who don't wash their hands after using the bathroom in any capacity and we've secretly kept a list so to avoid any potlucks where they take food or to get food before they do."

- SafewordisJohnCandy

We're left with chills after reading these stories.

Where some people might make some mistakes in the kitchen out of just not knowing, like not properly washing rice before cooking it, most of these are just careless mistakes that have disgusting, if not dangerous, results.

Collection of VHS tapes
Bruno Guerrero/Unsplash

What makes us all unique is our passions and the things we love, whether it's singing in the shower, reading books, or listening to specific music artists.

Unfortunately, we live in a world where we are judged for our various tastes and interests thanks to social media, and it makes us consciously selective about sharing the things we love on the internet.

Curious to hear about people's personal desires under anonymity, Redditor sweet_chick283 asked:

"What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?"

These aren't really chores for the following Redditors.

Good Clean Fun

"Mopping, im a janitor and generally hate my work... but damn mopping is so good."

– MrDDog06

"When you have a great rhythm going it is something special. I get the same feeling while I vacuum, but won’t let my wife know I enjoy it."

– Bogus_34

Act Of Unwrinkling

"Ironing clothes. A dozen of them. Can’t explain how it relaxes me. I told one person and they looked at me like I’m crazy."

– eerie_white_glow

"My mum misses the days when dad would be out on a Friday night, my brother out with friends and me upstairs quietly playing PS1. She would pour herself a Bacardi & Coke and do the ironing while watching her TV shows."

"I'm sure she doesn't really miss it now that we've moved out and they've retired but it was her wind-down after a busy working week so I can see how people can find it relaxing."

– xdq

Our solo actions can spark joy.

Big Brother Is Watching

"pretending to be on the Truman show and whenever im in my house i act all inconspicuous so they dont know that i know that they’re watching me."

– Bec_121

"C’mon man, you’re not supposed to let him know. You signed a contract when signing up for live views. I’m reporting you."

– doeswaspsmakehoney

The Multi-Tasker

"Playing video games naked at home while eating cheese."

– thickening_agent

Releasing The Kraken

"I love the feeling when you've eaten good fibre and let out a solid long train log in the toilet. That feeling is heavenly."

– therapoootic

"Even better when it’s a clean wipe and not a poo crayon."

– TheWarmestHugz

Ultimate Comfort

"My (male 41) weekend routine is coming home from work, make hot chocolate, start a fire, dress in a ugly pink nightgown made for old ladies and watch forensic files."

– crazyloomis

Some people are obsessed with collecting things.

So Kawai

"Sanrio stationery stores. All those different multicolor pens, a thousand kinds of erasers, spiral bound notebooks galore... my kids sadly have absolutely no appreciation for this wonderland..."

– HavingNotAttained

It's A Staple

"Office supplies have a weird, special place in my heart ever since I was a kid. They don't even have to be 'cute' necessarily."

"Japan's legendary stationery stores is unironically a reason I want to go."

– _CozyLavender_

Not Caring Anymore

"The older I get the shorter that list gets. Not because I love less things, but because I don't care about hiding it."

– Bi-Beast

"YES!! I'm 53 now. I'm working my first job in public since 2006. Today is Halloween and we're allowed to dress up so I am sitting here waiting to go to work dressed as a VERY bad Wednesday Addams. My bf said I'd 'look stupid' because no one else will probably dress up and I'm like, 'WHO CARES!' My makeup looks horrible and not like I practiced, but I DO NOT CARE! I'm having fun with it anyhow and I don't care if my coworkers dress up or not. I'm bein' ME! :)"

– deanie1970

Honorable mentions start here.

The Savior

"Picking up worms from the street and sidewalks when it rains and moving them into the dirt so they don’t burn in the sun, every time it rains I do this."

– sky_kitten89

Hero Of The Moment

"Yoooo I scoot SO many snails and worms. I work as a tech/mechanic at an automotive shop, I had a peoject car towed to my house the other day and it was covered in snails. I saw them when the tow guy/coworker was unloading and I was like, 'oh! It comes with free snails!' and began moving them. He laughed then realized and said, '... Oh, you're serious. Uh... Okay.'"

"I don't care who knows it. These little things barely can look out for themselves, why shouldn't we if we can take a moment to help? I don't care what happens next, it probably doesn't matter overall but I can help this moment."

– chris14020

Why should some of the hidden desires mentioned above have to be secret?

Redditors opening up about some of these would make them a hit at parties–no shaming.

As a matter of fact, I'll totally be down for a Forensic Files viewing party where we all make hot chocolate, light the fireplace, and cozy up together in our respective pink ugly nightgowns for old ladies.

historical reenactors
Sigmund on Unsplash

We've probably all heard some variation of the saying "Truth is stranger than fiction."

Real life isn't just strange, it can also be downright ridiculous.

History is riddled with moments of absurdity.

So ridiculous that people have a hard time believing real life is, well, really real.

Keep reading...Show less