Amish People Reveal How The Lack Of Technology Impacts Their Lives
Amish People Reveal How The Lack Of Technology Impacts Their Lives[rebelmouse-image 18345329 is_animated_gif=
One reddit user asked: Amish of Reddit, how does not using technology affect your lives?
First of all, not a lot of Amish on Reddit - for obvious reasons. What we do find is a lot of people with experience working with, or communing with, and even DATING Amish people. We tend to think of them as isolated and disconnected, but that's not always the case. These stories show us that there may be a lack of modern technology, but there's no lack of modern interaction - or porn. No lack of porn at all.
Buckle up, we're gonna get Amish on it.
Pornhub On A Kyocera[rebelmouse-image 18345330 is_animated_gif=
So. I work in a cell phone store, and probably 30% of my customers are Amish.
There is one group that does not allow smart phones, but does allow "battery phones." I sell a lot of "battery phones."
It's a cell phone. Samsung gusto 3. Samsung Convoy 4. Kyocera cadence. Apparently these aren't "cell phones," or "smart phones," but "battery phones."
And if your "English" neighbor has wifi, you have wifi.
A Kyocera cadence can get to tube sites on wifi.
"I Flushed and Nothing Happened"[rebelmouse-image 18345331 is_animated_gif=
When I was like 16 my mom forced me to go on some church trip where we toured Amish country in Intercourse, PA. We ate dinner at some old lady's house and she talked to us about life there. The whole community used a public phone located next to the highway, they didn't use electricity at all in their houses and relied on pneumatic plumbing.
Whatever I ate did not sit well with me. The lady looked super uncomfortable when I asked to use her bathroom, but I had a major storm a brewin' and just did not care.
I excused myself from their table and completely annihilated their toilet. I flushed, thankful to be rid of my demons, washed my hands, and started to leave the little washroom when suddenly my gut gurgled and I knew it was time for round two. I basically sandblasted the porcelain. After shakily getting to my feet, I flushed and nothing happened. Slight panic rising in my throat, I flush again but like, more firmly as if i were trying to convince it to work. Instead of my mess disappearing, it rose toward me slowly and menacingly approaching the brim of the bowl. Luckily it didn't overflow but it was so close i couldn't even give it a plunge, had there even been one available.
I just quietly placed the cover over the seat, slipped out of the bathroom and rejoined everyone around the table, hoping no one would go in there til after we left. Well the pastor's wife who came with us as a chaperone went into the bathroom sometime later, and immediately came rushing back out all frantic and practically yells "who went in the bathroom?"
Everyone was silent for a second, but I just felt my face go blood red and felt all my nerves burning in shame, and then everyone simultaneously turned to look at me. I stammered about being sick and the food not sitting well (old Amish lady looks super offended, all her family are just bewildered) and excused myself again. I walked outside and got on the church bus and sat there until everyone piled in to leave. No one looked at me the whole 6 hour trip home.
Electric Amish[rebelmouse-image 18345332 is_animated_gif=
To answer the question, there seemed to be a growing number of what's called the "electric Amish." Being Amish apparently isn't about rejecting technology, it's about rejecting the pace at which technology has advanced recently.
Basically, the Amish that I know use their phones to:
1. Call a ride from someone "English" (that's what the Amish call non-Amish) who is allowed to drive.
2. Conduct business such as bookkeeping and online payments.
Dating Amish[rebelmouse-image 18345333 is_animated_gif=
I went on a couple dates with a guy who was raised Amish, and still retains a bunch of the habits from his youth.
He told me things were slower. Getting information, solving problems, etc. all took a lot longer. News travels from person to person and if you're not one of the first to hear, you usually get a slightly incorrect version due to it being retold so many times.
He was one of 13 children, so he always had people to play with. There was no one at school who he was not somehow related to, so until he moved out and got a smartphone as an adult, dating was a lot harder.
Their rejection of technology extended to the medical field. He has never been to a doctor, received a vaccine, or visited a dentist. When we were going out, he was pretty sure he had a broken foot but wasn't certain and had no plans to see a doctor.
He does not own a TV or a computer. He sees no reason to. His smartphone can do all of that.
Additionally, he's still more comfortable on a horse than in a car. He's never been on a plane because they scare him. I didn't ask about trains.
Not growing up with any technology has made him a very unique person. He cherishes conversation more than most people. He can build and fix more things than anyone I ever met. He keeps a garden for produce and has a better appreciation for nature than most.
Most of his family is still Amish. He hasn't been properly shunned, and they still communicate via handwritten snail mail. If he ever watches sports, he goes to the local sports bar to watch.
Uncle Amish[rebelmouse-image 18345335 is_animated_gif=
My uncle decided to join an Amish community about 10 years ago. He was a catholic preist but questioned his faith when over half his immediate family died within a year (my dad is the only immediate left) He's found peace in the world and just got married a few years ago. He translates French to German and vice versa and really enjoys what he does. I'll drive out to his place and visit him (4 hour drive from my house) as the only real way to keep in touch.
Tractor Joyrides Are Frowned Upon[rebelmouse-image 18345336 is_animated_gif=
communities vary greatly on the allowable tech. They actually have a council of local members that decides what is permissible in their community aesthetics.
It's kinda like a huge HOA.
Not uncommon, they can use power tools and electric lights in a shop, and diesel tractors. But not at home.
It gets odd at times. One decreed you could only have steel-rimmed tractors, no rubber tires. Because some members were taking tractors on outings a little too often. Steel wheels would be illegal on paved roads,
Some allow electricity at home but only for refrigeration and lights.
They often bum rides off their "english" outsider neighbors, or ask to use their phone. There is sometimes a phone booth just outside the community. It's just to keep it from being used for distracting casual chitchat.
The Amish Are Trendsetters[rebelmouse-image 18345338 is_animated_gif=
I'm not Amish, but I'm very close to someone who is. The idea is about focus only on what's important to them. They live minimally so that they can devote all of their energy to doing what they want - like spent time with God and family. By minimizing material possessions, it keeps friends and neighbors the focus. I'm atheist, but I see some logic in their traditions. "Trendy" people call it downsizing, minimalism, etc. Like the whole tiny house thing. But the Amish have seen the benefits of that for a long time.
Summer Job[rebelmouse-image 18345339 is_animated_gif=
I used to work summers on Amish farm. Some of my favorite parts.
- Some of them love Amish Paradise by Weird Al.
- They bought a 2016 truck with all the bells and whistles, then they hire non-Amish to drive them around.
- They use flip phones.
- They con each other constantly. Because they trust local Amish stores more than outsider stores, they'll pay up to like 400% for something.
- The babies and toddlers just wear mini versions of the adult clothing.
Amish Basketball Court[rebelmouse-image 18345340 is_animated_gif=
Where I live, Amish all have cell phones. Most have fax machines. Many have generators for LED lights in their houses and satellite dishes to watch college basketball. A lot of them are obsessed with college b ball.
Myself and a few of my buddies actually challenged some amish guys to a game of basketball once. We played at their place. They had a barn with an indoor full court with benches lining the side.
They were pretty damn good and ran a lot of pick and rolls. Of course they played in their normal Amish clothes, but wore basketball shoes. Most young amish here wear Nike hightops. They also love mountain dew and can be seen with cart loads at the local wallmart.
I've worked around them in construction for 20+ years. 99.9% of Amish are great people.
Electric Bike Kerfuffle[rebelmouse-image 18345342 is_animated_gif=
Not Amish but work with a LOT of them. My company manufacturers electric bicycles. Our biggest customer is located in Amish country. Interestingly they have phones and love the electric bikes. Everyone once and awhile we get an email from them. Apparently there is a lot of kerfuffle over ebikes and if they should be accepted in Amish country or not. But sales indicate they're popular.
I won't pretend I know anything about them but I at least know they use "technology" to some degree.
Sense Of Community[rebelmouse-image 18345343 is_animated_gif=
I listened to a Malcom Gladwell podcast. His family joined a Mennonite church when he was a kid. Mennonite's are like more liberal, less serious Amish. He said that the sense of community is unlike anything we are used to in the modern world.
The example he gave was that if someone's barn burned down, the next day everyone, and he meant everyone would come with whatever extra materials they had on hand to rebuild or food for everyone helping. When he said everyone he meant every single man woman and child of the community. They would do a barn raising and finish it in 2 days. One day for the framing and what not and the 2nd day to finish it.
It was a very interesting podcast and I suggest anyone interested give it a listen. It's Generous Orthodoxy - Revisionist History Season 1, Ep. 9.
Solar Power[rebelmouse-image 18345344 is_animated_gif=
The Amish take advantage of solar technology all the time, yo. It's crazy to me because they have completely skipped the "bad for the earth electric" and jumped straight into clean energy. Almost all new houses being built here in Ohio Amish country are wired for solar and have big panels.
Amish Cool Whip[rebelmouse-image 18345346 is_animated_gif=
One day our middle age neighbors, husband and wife, went out and came back with about 50 containers of Cool Whip. We could see them unloading all the Cool Whip from their black, of course, sedan. We don't normally spy on neighbors but, hey, Cool Whip is awesome and 50 containers does catch your eye.
We've spent the last 25 years wondering how all that Cool Whip was going to be used. Odd what stays burrows into the crevices of your mind.
Simple People[rebelmouse-image 18345347 is_animated_gif=
I am of Amish descent and have been around them somewhat. They are just a simple people and I have recently decided through my own endeavors to limit my phone use. I imagine that the lack of technology can only help them become real people within their community. My lack of use of technology helps me recognize I am more than just a phone number/words on a screen. I can only believe that my distant cousins may be something more raw and similar.
The dating scene can be really tough, and obviously one of the most difficult elements is going to be the breaking up period.
For this reason, some Redditors shared the advice they would give to someone who had only just begun to date one of their ex partners.
Redditor drifterdodger asked:
"What advice would you give the person dating your ex?"
Last But Certainly Not Least
"Which one? For most, I would just say I hope it works out better for you than it did me, but for one of them, I'd tell you to treat her like a princess because she deserves the best."
Mistakes Were Made
"Treat him well because he will treat you better than you have ever known. Make him laugh because he’ll make you laugh like you’ve never known."
"Let him hold the door open for you, he really wants to. Hold him back when he holds you and don’t let go."
"Don’t make the mistakes I did."
“She’s wonderful, you’re the luckiest man alive. Treat her with all the love and respect she deserves. Make her feel safe, secure, loved, and desired."
"Take it from me, don’t project. Work on yourself if necessary so that you don’t pass that on to her and hurt her in any way. And if you do hurt her, talk to her, communicate, talk about it, and don’t keep it all in."
"Just be kind and loving, put yourself out there, and fight alongside her, not with her."
Fun in the Kitchen
"She’s a great cook, so if you’re a foodie, then inquire about all sorts of exotic stuff you want to try. She’ll probably make it for you."
"Understand that when she says she hopes you have fun hanging out with your friends, she is actually furious that you decided to be with them instead of her, no matter how many consecutive nights you’ve spent together."
"This will then lead to her imagining several ridiculous and unrealistic scenarios of what you are 'actually doing,' which will then likely lead to her having a panic attack, and you will then need to leave whatever you are doing that night to go to her house and try to calm her down."
"So yeah, aside from that minor issue, she’s great."
Rating: Zero Stars
"Flee. Get away, far away. Change your number, name, appearance, possibly gender."
Would Not Recommend
"Check her phone once in a while. She’s cheated on you with pretty much every guy she’s ever met, and with every one of her exes, regularly."
Textbook Ex Material
"As narcissists will, she will make you feel important. Once you are hooked, then she will manipulate you to bend your will. You will never live up to her expectations, so you will be seen as not a priority."
"Lastly, the sex is meh and I always thought she felt dirty by doing it, so that’s why we stopped."
Healing Time May Vary
"She needs to fix herself. She never gave herself time to heal and looks for healing in others instead of working on herself."
"She’s kind and good-hearted, but needs healing."
They're Just Hangry
"You can end arguments with food."
"She loves steak but is scared of steak knives."
"She dislikes pork despite growing up in a region famous for its cuisine. Bacon is okay."
"If she falls asleep during the movie, let her lean onto your shoulder. She likes that."
"She can be quite funny with Facebook messenger text stickers but prepare for a shy and sweet person in real life."
"She loves to share her culture (mainland Chinese) and wants to learn about American culture so be well educated in Western sciences, arts, and history to answer her questions and equally eager to learn about hers."
"Take small steps literally. She was only 5'-0" with shoes and does not like a brisk pace."
"If it doesn't work out in person or things happen to where she had to go back to her homeland, don't expect a long-distance relationship. One day the messages do stop coming and your heart will break."
"If she's angry, buy her some chicken nuggets and milk tea."
"If she's sad, go to her house and make some instant noodles for her."
"If she's happy, well... good job, my friend."
"Make sure she drinks lots of water because she usually forgets to, make sure you play with her hair, and make sure to hold her hand whilst you're driving."
"Make sure to always say good morning to her, make sure that you prioritize her, make sure you give her lots of attention, and make sure you love her more than I did."
"I'm not crying, you are."
Depends on the Ex
"Usually, I'd say run, but since it's the a**hat they cheated on me with (knowingly), I'd say: you deserve each other so go to h**l holding hands; I wouldn't want you to get lost on the way."
"To the other ex's partner: You are privileged to be loved by such an amazing and kind-hearted person, so hold on to and nourish this relationship to the best of your abilities, and hopefully it will make you both happy to the end of your days."
"Take care of him. And if you ever decide to leave him, call me, I'll be there to pick him up."
Usually when people think of talking about exes, the horror stories are usually the first to come to mind.
Fortunately for these Redditors, there were easily as many sweet and nostalgic stories as there were problematic ones.
Money is one of those things that many people find themselves wanting more of, simply for the sake of security and safety.
But for those who have money in multitudes, it's almost baffling how willingly they will throw large quantities of it away.
Already cringing, Redditor DefinitelyNot203Eels asked:
"What is the most egregious display of wealth you've ever personally seen?"
Unique Employment Opportunity
"I have a friend who was employed by a very famous old pop star. She lived on-site in his mansion (which itself was a very cute cottage) and was paid more than I am with no rent or bills for said cottage."
"Her job? To open the curtains of his bedroom in the mornings, put on classical music, and gently wake him up for the day."
"That sounds sexual, but it wasn't sexual; it was more like, 'Hey, hey big star, I know you're still sleepy but it's time to get up,' etc."
"My boss who owns his own plane likes to do s**t like flaunt the keys to his cars... Like, flick them round up close to the camera on a call to show off the logo."
"I think it really bugs him that I don't 'ooh' and 'aah' because I don't give a f**k about fancy cars."
"What does p**s me off is that there's an item I brought after much saving, and it means a lot to me. He heard about it and just went and brought two so he could comment about it."
Her Annual Salary
"The company owner got a divorce, went on a shopping spree, and showed a receipt for tens of thousands of dollars to our receptionist as a way of showing off."
"What he spent was 80% of what she makes in a year. She was really uncomfortable and brought it to me as the HR (Human Resources) person."
A Yacht for Your Yacht
"The first time I saw a support vessel, I was blown away."
"It's a yacht that accompanies your main yacht, and it stores your toys in its garage, it houses some of your staff, stores your supplies, etc."
The "Just in Case" Staff
"I once met a woman while I was living in Singapore who was a full-time live-aboard chef for a super rich European who had several vessels, but only took a holiday on the one she worked on maybe once a year, but sometimes even more seldom."
"A full staff lived aboard full time, year-round, just in case this guy wanted to board, in which case they would sail to the port where he wanted them to pick him up."
The Biggest Cabin of Them All
"I worked in construction project management. We were building a log cabin for a very wealthy individual using western redwood. We had the piles, and foundation in place, the first floor completed, and about 25% done building the second floor."
"The largest base width of the redwood logs we were using was 44 feet, and the two-story fireplace that included 12 hearths was clad in architectural stone."
"The owner found out that the owner of a car dealership on the other side of the lake had just completed his log cabin with the largest logs being 46 feet in width. The owner got one of his employees to sneak onto the property at night and take measurements of the logs to confirm they were in fact bigger than the logs on his cabin."
"Once it was confirmed that the logs across the lake were bigger, he instructed us to take apart what has already been built, and source new, bigger logs with the smallest log being no less than 48 feet in width."
"He also instructed us to remove the architectural stone from the fireplace and replace them with actual stones. This required us to modify the foundation, as the weight of the fireplace increased by 1500%."
"After about 1.5 years, with no limit on overtime spending, the cabin was completed, with the largest log being 68 feet in width, and smallest being 48 feet."
"I ran into the car dealership owner at the lake town market one day and told him about the cabin we were building and how we had to pretty much start from scratch due to the size of his logs (and my boss's ego)."
"He simply replied, 'I had no idea your boss even owned a cabin here.'"
"I had an amazing side gig instructing tech nerds how to drive their fancy cars at the racetrack (it's called an 'HPDE' or a High-Performance Driving Event)."
"A rich tech nerd shows up with a new McLaren 12C, delivered in a McLaren trailer and staffed by an entire crew of McLaren techs and engineers."
"The driver was complaining about how the $12k brakes would burn up after just one day at the track and escalated enough for McLaren to wonder if something was terribly wrong with the car."
"After one session, he huddled around a laptop with the engineers and found what was wrong: he was just that terrible of a driver."
If You've Got It, Spend It
"A dude just kept grabbing stuff and having me ring it up. At first, I was like, 'You sure?' Then it eventually clicked that this guy was on a shopping spree."
"The shop had no human necessities. I don't remember the total by the end but it was close to 5 figures in USD."
"He pulled out his black AMEX that weighs like a pound and boom, a mile-long receipt."
"That was one of the few days I wished I made commissions."
"When I worked at Blue, Justin Beiber spent a stupid amount of money just to ski. He tried to rent the whole resort to make it private, but they wouldn't let him (which I still think is hilarious)."
"This area also has dozens of houses that are all valued well over $10 million, that all sit empty. They're just buildings that billionaires bought on a whim."
A Library Belle Would Envy
"I'm a custom metal worker. We did the penthouse at the Plaza Hotel in Manhattan, off of Central Park (the owner lived there). The floors were made of titanium plates."
"The wife had her own massive library and we had to make a rolling staircase that an old woman could move. We did, and it cost $80,000."
"We delivered it and she said, 'It’s too steep, can you make another?'"
"$80,000 later, she’s happy, and my buddy has a rolling staircase at his workshop."
Holy Mansions, Batman
"I once toured a mansion under construction in Dallas that was about 45,000 square feet. It was about 80% complete when I visited and the interior finishes were amazing."
"When I was there, the artisans were hand-carving the front door details and the indoor-outdoor pool was being tiled."
"There was a bowling alley, a gift-wrapping room, a two-story master bedroom closet with a spiral staircase, and other over-the-top amenities including a ten-car garage with an oil change bay."
"Shortly after I was there, it burned down under mysterious circumstances, and its demise made the national news and a cover story in the Wall Street Journal."
"A kid in my daughter's sorority drives a 2022 Lamborghini Urus. Every time I've visited my daughter, I see this car."
"It's filthy and covered in dings and scratches. My daughter says the owner has had it towed repeatedly by leaving it parked illegally in the street even though she has a space at the sorority."
"She'll just leave it on the street near the bars, Uber home when drunk, abandon the car until it gets impounded, and then pay to get her car back. Basically every weekend."
"In addition, my daughter says this girl's room is full of designer stuff that the girl bought for tens of thousands of dollars, wore once, and then threw on the floor."
"I should note that there are apparently several girls in this sorority with similar lifestyles."
It's Just a Parking Fee
"My boss had to impromptu get a new license to travel. When he was at the DMV, they said he had to pay like $100k in back parking tickets. He just set a card down and paid it."
"Apparently, he couldn't get a parking permit to be able to park in front of his house for some bulls**t reason, so he just parked there anyway, and just accepted that they were ticketing him like $100 per day for years."
"I work at a Zipline in Hawaii. One time we had a couple of people come in, and one of them was a Saudi prince."
"Any time someone helped, or even talked to him, he had his 'assistant' count out hundred-dollar bills and give them to them. He tipped his guides $3000 a piece. It was wild."
Paying It Forward
"While at a breakfast place I went to a lot in my hometown, I went to pay for my meal, and the waitress was like, 'Don't worry, it is covered.'"
"The next day, I went back. Once again, my meal was covered."
"Repeat for the rest of a week, and I was baffled."
"Apparently, some rich dude liked his breakfast a week ago and bought all orders for the following week and tipped all the staff $10k to keep it a secret and to cover the loss of tips for the week."
"It was a small mom-and-pop shop, but that still has to have cost him 100k or something. For a meal."
"There was intentionally no hype, and the other regulars and I were never told who it was."
While there were a few kind and generous people among the fold, the Reddit community could not believe the amount of money many people would spend simply because they could, even in support of bad habits, like terribly wasteful spending.
Having money certainly doesn't buy you manners or values.
Let's face it, being single is tough for a lot of us, especially when there's a special occasion coming up or all of our closest friends and family are in relationships while we're alone.
But the Reddit community wanted to remind the singles out there that there's more to think about in starting a new relationship than just feeling those butterflies.
Redditor Huge-Tackle-2152 asked:
"What is something everyone should know before getting into a relationship?"
Actions Above Words
"Love is an action and a choice. You need to make the choice to love someone you’re in a relationship with by showing that love to them."
"Love isn’t just the romantic feelings you have for someone. You have to actually 'do' love."
It's a Two-Way Street
"Not only are you getting a partner, but you also need to BE one, as well."
"Many people want to be in a relationship because they want someone, but they are not ready to actually be a partner, as well."
"Communication. If you're not communicating, then you're never going to be on the same page about anything, fights will never end, and problems will keep festering and come back to bite the both of you, etc."
"How you fight is important. It is so easy to hurt someone once you are close to them and you can't unsay things."
Accept the Dealbreakers
"Accept the other person as they are. You won’t be able to change them or who they are at their core, which means that if there’s something about them that’s a dealbreaker for you, don’t expect that it will ever change."
"Take that as your cue to leave or not start dating."
Accept Yourself, Too
"If you're pretending to be someone you aren't to get into the relationship, it's not going to work."
"You gotta cast your net a little further. There's a difference between putting yourself out there and pretending to be into s**t you secretly hate to land a partner."
Not Everyone Is Your Person
"Don't chase someone who has made it abundantly clear they do not want you. If someone is interested in you, there won't be any confusion. It will be cut and clear."
"If you find yourself trying to change fundamental parts of who you are, to be what someone needs, that's not your person."
You May Be the Problem
"Nobody is perfect, not even you. If you think someone is perfect, you are lying to yourself."
"If you think you are perfect, you are lying to yourself and everyone else. (And they are tired of your pompous bulls**t.)"
Your Happiness, Your Responsibility
"If you think the other person’s job is to MAKE you happy, everyone is going to have a bad time."
"Of course, you can and should contribute to each other's happiness, but the individual must choose positivity and levity and work on their inner demons. No other people can achieve that for you."
"Lust isn't love."
Be Honest About Your Intentions
"Here’s one based on a painful experience of mine. If you’re not looking for a relationship and only want a f**k buddy, don’t pretend you want a relationship just to keep getting someone’s attention."
"You’ve wasted their time and will negatively impact their ability to have a relationship in the future."
Don't Compromise on the Important Things
"But don’t compromise on your deal breakers or hope you can change someone. You should find someone who is compatible with you on the big things: what kind of life you want, if you want kids, how you handle disagreements, how you handle money, etc."
"Also, learn what common red flags for abuse are in relationships. Don’t compromise on those."
The Relationship Has More than Two People
"Have you met their family and friends?"
"Once you form a relationship, family and friends come along for the ride."
They Won't All Work Out
"Sometimes it’s just not worth fighting for. Relationships have hard times. But it shouldn’t ALWAYS be a hard time."
"Sometimes you just have to accept your energies don’t align and move on to allow yourself true happiness."
But Sometimes It's Worth It
"Love is a choice. You can be mad, you can be sad, you can be frustrated with your life, and it might reflect on your perspective of the other person, you might not even feel 'in love' at that moment, but you can always choose to love them."
"And usually, it's worth it."
While the subReddit could admit that relationships can be pretty great, there are many considerations that go into committing to it.
From staying true to ourselves, to connecting to the other people in our partner's life, there's much more to love than romantic dates.
Who doesn't enjoy a compliment every now and then?
But have you ever thought you were complimented only to realize you've just been insulted?
For some people those backhanded compliments are unintentional, for some they're very much deliberate and for some people it's actually their love language.
Whatever the purpose, some of these veiled insults are downright clever.
Redditor Ad3quat3 asked:
"What’s an insult that sounds like a compliment?"
"My uncle once said to me 'Nice tattoo, did you do it yourself?'."
"It's on my back."
What do I usually look like?
"You clean up well."
"Wasn't sure if compliment or insult or even how to respond."
Pandemic or party?
"You really look great with this mask!"
Lord, it's hard to be humble.
"You are very modest and have much to be modest about."
"You look well... Fed."
"Did you REALLY do that?"
Stay home next time.
"Thanks for coming!"
"You know, you really didn’t have to.”
"No one could possibly think more highly of you than I do."
"I love how you just don't care how you look."
"I could never do that I'd feel too awkward."
Depends on the person, right?
"I hope your day is as good as you look!"
"I hope you get what you deserve."
"May your day be as sweet as you are."
While some may consider it passive-aggressive, others just find these insults funny and clever.
So what's your favorite complimentary insult?