We tend to scoff at terrible baby names–especially the ones that make us sympathize with the child who will ultimately face humiliation as they grow up.
But equally as cringy are certain names people name their pets.
Sure, they may come from a loving place, but still, poor doggo.
Curious to hear of unforgivable pet names from those who work with animals, Redditor Lia_Julee asked:
"Vets of Reddit, What was the worst pet name you have ever encountered in your job?"
They're choices, but not necessarily the right ones. What were they thinking? We'll never know.
Return To Sender
"Envelope"
– Mskorn85
"Actually, Darren, it's pronounced En-vel-oh-pee"
– Lilzhazskillz
Bad Mashup
"I’m deeply involved in the horse world. There’s a 'discipline' called halter, and many of the horses are genetic atrocities to begin with. They’ve been bred to the point of uselessness."
"When naming quarter horses, many breeders like to create a registered name that incorporates the parents’ names and bloodlines. So, somebody bred together the stallion Kid’s Classic Style and the mare Lookin’ Touchable. The best name that the breeders could come up with for the foal?"
"KidsLookinTouchable."
"Yeah. That’s the best they could come up with."
– ModernPlagueDoctor
Winning Asset
"Old neighbor lady had a cat named 'face.'”
"because it had a beautiful face, she said."
– praisethehaze
What About The Dressing?
"My brother in law named his cat Salad."
– LeagueIllustrious
Poor Doggo
"My old neighbors apparently thought it would be a good idea to let their 3 year old name their dog."
"The dog was named dump truck."
– [deleted]
Here's a name that just left Redditors scratching their heads.
Sensual Misfire
"Sexy - for a chihuahua. Just made the whole consultation very awkward."
– prouvairee
Expected One-Liners
"If you could just lift Sexy up here please, thank you."
"Now I might need your help to hold Sexy down."
"I'm going to put this in your butt Sexy but I'll be quick."
– Opening-Thought-5736
The Followup Appointment
"Yes, but will you bring sexy back?"
– ermahgerdshoez
These examples say a lot about the pet owners.
There Are Worse Things Than Just Names
"Mom owns a vet practice so had a lot of these."
"Best/worse pet parents named their cat D.O.G. and their dog C.A.T."
"James Bond was my favorite doggy (Pekinese). He was hilarious."
"There were so many Mittens, Fluffys, Spots and Buddy's they got lost in the sea of animals."
"Worst story was a rescued golden retriever who was so malnourished they nick named him Pancake. Sadly, Pancake's kidneys were done so he dies 2 days after he was rescued by the local animal control. The two days I got to feed and spend time with him made it all the harder to realize he could have been saved if his family had let him go instead of leaving him chained up in the yard before they left."
"I hate people a lot of the time."
– AzureaWinds
Jokester
"I used to work at a pallet repair yard and a bloke had the last name Pallet. Initial A."
"A. Pallet."
"Funny as f'k when delivery drivers asked him for his name to sign the delivery note."
– Jaster_Rogue
Sure, many of these are hilariously absurd.
But the poor, poor animals are the ones not laughing, right, "Sexy?"
Redditor KiLLz_Smanrx7 was hoping people would open up about dealing with bullies, so they asked:
"People who fought back against bullies, what caused it and how badly did the bully get hurt?"
I can't remember my bullies.
I think that's the best recourse.
For my Sister
A Christmas Story GIF by filmeditorGiphy"I think I was about 10. He'd been bullying me and my sisters for a couple of years. He tried to sneak up on my sister on the bus. He stretched out his hand like he was going to pull her hair or something. I made a fist, swung it backwards and him in the eye. He cried."
Fun_in_Space
Shattered Pride
"Little bit of backstory first. We were playing tackle the carrier. I was a fourth grader, and I tackled a sixth grader, and he got pissed off and started to kick me."
"I let it happen a few times a teacher was literally looking right at me. After about the fourth time I grabbed his leg and lifted. He fell backwards then I punched him in the face twice. He only got a bloody nose and shattered pride. We each got suspended for three days. My mom was pissed at the school after they told the story to her. Then when she watched the footage, she asked me in front of the principal if there was a new game I wanted."
"Principal was mad but my mom said 'I never teach my boys to start anything. But when the teacher refused to end it he did by defending himself.' Best three day weekend ever. P.S. we were related threw marriage and he got in huge trouble with his convict dad for getting beat up by a little kid."
Titalator
Keep Walking
"For some reason this kid had it in his head that he could beat me up. I’ve no idea why, or where his assumption came from but he wanted a fight with me to prove he could. I couldn’t care less if he could or couldn’t. It simply didn’t interest me."
"For a week or more he would goad me on the school bus with things like 'who do you think would win in a fight?' Etc. I was having none of it, I wasn’t interested in fighting anyone and I didn’t care what he or anyone else thought on the matter."
"He squared up to me several times off the bus trying to get me to fight with him and I just kept telling him to leave me alone and kept walking away."
"After several days of this and him getting nowhere, as I was walking away chatting with my friend, he ran up behind me and punched me on the back of my head."
"I very calmly asked my friend to hold my bag for me. I walked up to the kid, grabbed hold of him, tripped/threw him to the ground, punched him once in the face/eye, stood up and I walked away. I said nothing. Walked back to my friend, collected my bag and continued walking."
"I didn’t see this kid for a few days, and he unsurprisingly he left me alone after that."
Arisutea
RUN!
"Little league football - I was in 6th - brother in 4th grade - his bully in 5th. He intentionally tried to hurt my brother during practice - so I took off running - jumped in the air, went horizontal and landed my cleats in his chest. He lost his breath for a minute or so. I ran laps for many minutes. Bully no longer bothered little brother."
Sheehanigens
One Punch
I Win Take That GIF by Film RiotGiphy"Early high school, was going between classes getting something out of my locker. He shoved my head into my locker and without hesitation I turned around and punched him square in the chest as hard as I could. That was enough to get him to stop."
Qangulous-Yahrnam
What is the stuffing the locker obsession?
It's ASSAULT!
Say Sorry
Laugh At Ha Ha GIF by filmeditorGiphy"I saw a guy my age bullying a younger kid, so I got the entire bus to point at him at say 'bully, bully' over and over. He ended up crying."
"Problem was, my mom and his mom were friends, so my mom took me over to his house and made me apologize to him, so it wouldn't be awkward between her and his mom."
Veritas3333
The Last Day
"In high school i was bullied for a few years (mainly calling names, making 'jokes' and messing with my stuff). I used to never do anything back."
"Then at some point I got angry, turned around (he was standing behind me) and punched him in the face, giving him a bloody nose."
"That was also the last day I got bullied."
"In hindsight i think i mostly got picked on by him because i never did anything back and he did not want to risk any pushback. (Who says violence never solves anything?)"
The_Upperant
The Dude
"The one that comes to mind is the one kept trying to trip me. I finally called him on his sh*t and he slapped me which set me off. I body-slammed him and jumped on him. I got called to the office with my parents, and they wanted to suspend me but every other student that witnessed it stuck up for me and said it was self-defense and I got off with in-school suspension. The dude avoided me for the rest of our time in school."
Diesel-KC
A Strong Kick
"Two guys in high school tried to do the 'tabletop' move (one gets on all fours and the other pushes you). I stepped on the hand of the guy on the ground when I stepped back. Realized what was happening. Kicked him with kind of a horse kick while still stepping on his hand, and then fastballed the 20 oz bottle of Coke I was holding at the other guy’s head as hard as I could and ran away. They were both on the ground reeling."
CheeseIsQuestionable
Let's Wrestle
Wrestle The Elite GIF by All Elite Wrestling on TNTGiphy"Dude knocked my pizza out of my hand at lunch, so I took a running start and kicked him the gut. He got up and started to try to wrestle with me, while my friend tried break us up. All in all it lasted maybe 10 seconds, nobody hurt."
Jon__Snuh
Never touch the pizza.
Do you have any similar experiences? Let us know in the comments below.
"What is a split-second decision you made that change your life?"
Going With Your Conscience
"Had a boss who asked me to help him commit fraud."
"At the time I was very heavily in debt and badly needed the income, nonetheless I resigned immediately."
"Luck shined on me and I got another job a month later, just in time to pay bills."
"A few years after that I looked up my old boss, he got caught and served time."- GreedyNovel
Why It's Worth Pulling Your Eyes From The Screen
"Quitting a game of Call of Duty Zombies (whatever the one was in 2010/2011)."
"My friends in the dorm would play this constantly and were addicted."
"One day, my friend comes in and says he's going up to his gf's dorm to meet her new roommate, did anyone want to join."
"Normally, nothing could pry me from that game, but something compelled me to say yeah, sure."
"My buddies I was playing with were pissed."
"Went up there and had the closest thing to love at first sight I can describe."
"I still remember looking at this girl vividly."
"She's now my wife, and we have a 5 month old son together."- IslandsOnTheCoast
Love At First Sight Nicole GIF by Hallmark ChannelGiphyThink Twice Before Taking Off Your Pants
"My friend ('B') had just gotten off of work and would drive past my house on the way to hers every night."
"One night (December 27, 2007, to be exact) B decided to call me while leaving work and invite me to the bar for a drink."
"I had already started drinking and was about to decline the offer when she told me, 'I’m pulling into your driveway'."
"'You might as well put on some pants and come have a beer with me'.”
"No more than 30 seconds after we walked in, she was approached by another friend of hers ('N') and introduced us to each other."
"One year and three four days later - December 31, 2008 - N and I were married and have been ever since."
"If I hadn’t made the decision to put on pants, I likely wouldn’t have met my wife."- A_Prickly_Cactus
Making The Right Decisions For Your Health
"Making myself an appointment for in-patient rehab consultation."
"I couldn’t decide if I was being dramatic or necessary."
"5+ years sober now!"- jn7nh0
Some Feelings Just Can't Be Hidden
"I asked my best friend 'Do you want to talk about the unspoken thing'."
'It was a very impulsive decision, but something I had wanted to say for a long time. she responded 'What, the fact that we love each other, like romantically?''- Winter-Algae8569·
Season 5 Episode 121 GIF by FriendsGiphyThe More The Merrier
"January 2020, a coworker asked if I knew anyone that wanted to adopt a puppy."
"We had three dogs, were not considering another, and even discussed that three was definitely more than enough."
"For whatever reason, I asked him for pics and sent them to my wife."
"That evening we had a 4 month old pup that got along amazing with the family and the other dogs."
"Two months later I was laid off unexpectedly, not even related to covid."
"I was unemployed for over a year and this dog was by my side non-stop."
"Now, everyone in the family loves Rosy, but me and her have a special bond I've never had with a dog before."
"I'm literally tearing up as I write this, a 40yo bearded trucker, ffs."
"I just can't explain how special she is and how important she was to helping me get through the last couple of years."
"Not to dismiss my amazing wife, to be clear."
"When I'm home, I can't go to a different room without her coming along."
"When I'm gone for the night, she whines at my wife while going between her and the door, so I'm told."
"I guess that's not as 'life-changing' as some of these stories, but my life is definitely changed by the presence of her."- curlyfat
Dogs Wave Hi GIF by MOODMANGiphyJust When She'd Given Up All Hope...
"A person who was a stranger to me at the time logged in to delete her online dating profile."
"There was a message in her inbox."
"It was from me."
"15 years later, we are 12 years happily married."- mekdot83
You Can Never Be Too Sure...
"Going for a third opinion after being misdiagnosed by two doctors in a day for unnatural tiredness."
"The third doctor rushed me off to get urgent blood tests, and it turns out I had severe blood poisoning and was on the verge of organ failure."
'If I'd not gone for a third opinion, I'd be dead now."- Wickywahwah
Safety First!
"Not sure if this counts, but when I was 13 we had this little 50cc dirt bike that I would ride around the block every now and again."
"I was out riding one day and I start doing jumps off the curb."
"I remember landing sketchily and thinking 'a helmet would nice' so I went and out one on, did another curb jump and sure enough wipe and snake the side of my head on the pavement and concussed myself."
"I am sure I would’ve died without the helmet."- buttermansix
cycling fend GIF by GrouphuntGiphyAlways Follow Your Heart
"To quit my tenured job."
"I'm now living in a different city, completing a degree for a profession I am both interested in and naturally good at."
"If you'd told me 5 years ago that this is what I would be doing at the start of 2023, I would have had a panic attack over the thought of just dropping everything, quitting my profession and moving hours away from my home city."
"I was suffering then, but I didn't realize I had the strength to do it until I needed to do it."- ana-neemous
A Little Help Goes A Long Way
"A neighbor of mine is a teacher at an elementary school."
"One day, 6 years ago, she asked me if she could give my phone number to the parents of one of the kids at the school who needed tutoring."
"I wrote down my number for her and started tutoring the kid."
"Over time, I basically became part of the family."- AlmostChristmasNow
Really Knowing Who Your Friends Are
'Cutting my group of friends out of my life.'
"I always felt like crap around them, and one day I realized that they would never ever be there when I needed them."
"So I just noped out and changed numbers."- tsoro
Bye Bitch Get Out Of My Face GIF by Becky GGiphyIt's always scary to make a decision in the heat of the moment.
However, as the saying goes, "the heart knows what it wants".
"Guys of Reddit, what is the best compliment a girl could give you?"
No Pretending Required
"I can be myself around you."- noah1000000999
"Whenever a girl says she feels safe around me or feels secure/comfortable makes me feel so good it's indescribable."
"Makes me feel very manly."- kipskip_
I'll Take Them All!
"Pretty much any compliment will do."- Mysterious_Drama2772
I Want Them All Paramount Network GIF by YellowstoneThe Devil Is In The Details
"When I was younger, I had a meeting with a beautiful, slightly older woman from a different organization that I admired in our industry."
"When we were shaking hands and saying hello, she thoughtlessly blurted out, 'Oh, you're cute', then apologized and said she's not hitting on me and that she's married."
"Then, she tried to change the topic by talking about one of my recent projects, which I was surprised she knew."
"Both were nice compliments."- NoConsideration5775
Keep It Simple
"I like you."- Smirknlurking
It's Worth the Weight
“'I love you'."
"Yet to hear it but I imagine it sounds good."- Or4ngut4n
Or Just "You're Cute" In General...
"'You're cute when you're excited'."
"Still riding the high from that one, and that was 3 years ago."- JackCooper_7274
Striking Resemblance
"Girl at the mall told me I looked like Ryan Gosling."
"She couldn’t be more wrong, the comment was an affront to everything Ryan Gosling stands for."
'T'was appreciated however."
"Gonna be riding that high for the next 3-37 years"- -Praetoria-
happy homer simpson GIFWhen You Got It, Flaunt It...
"A girl at work told me another girl told her that I have a nice a**."
"She tried to keep the girl anonymous but I tricked her into admitting who it was."
"The one that told me also complimented me on my legs and looks in general."
"Feels weird being complimented on my a** and legs as a guy but I guess it's better than nothing?"- Lambesis96
It's All In The Eyes...
"A female friend of mine once told me I had 'kind eyes' when I smiled."
"Best compliment I ever received."
"I just smiled normally and genuinely, and she picked up on it."
"Man, I miss her."- midnight_reborn
Great Hair Is Hard To Resist...
"'You are hot' would be very surprising yet welcome."
"I also get "your hair looks great" a lot."- KomradeElmo0
ricky rubio nba GIF by Utah JazzGiphySetting Standards For The Future
"Back when I was 9 years old my mum's friend meeting me for the first time told me that once I grow up I will be a super sexy handsome dude all the gals will drool over."
"That didn't happen but it was nice to hear back then."- playerhamdan
Should anyone find that special guy, and want to let him know just how special they think he is, all of the above compliments are a good way to start.