A couple years ago, Reddit user gfjq23 got into a Facebook argument with her sister over whether or not Santa Claus exists. She became concerned over her sister's reaction, which included blowing the issue way out of proportion. It was so bad, OP's sister got medical tests done - and it revealed something unexpected.
Original Poster had asked Reddit for advice at the time and then provided an update.
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
To summarize the last post, I posted a Ryan Reynolds meme about Santa Claus not being real on Facebook which my 13-year-old niece saw. My sister flipped out about it and wanted me to publicly rescind and say how Santa is real, but I thought my nieces were too old to believe in that stuff and refused. It lead to a crazy fight between us. Link to the original.
Anyway, I talked to my nieces and neither of them believe in Santa, so they were baffled about the fight. I talked to my BIL and he said my sister has been flying off the handle lately. We agreed she should probably get a check up and he convinced her to go to the doctor.
Onto the update. They did a MRI and nothing showed up. Then they did some bloodwork which looked fine, except some elevated cholesterol. She isn't pregnant. They pretty much wrote her off as a crazy person and sent her to a psychologist for stress. After a session, the psychologist told her to do some "deep breathing" and sent her away as fixed.
She got worse. She stopped sleeping and barely ate, yet still gained weight. Any small annoyance would send her into a rage. Commercials were making her so upset she would ugly cry. I asked my BIL if they tested hormone levels or anything like that and he said the doctors didn't feel it was necessary.
She called me one day crying and apologizing, saying she was the worst sister ever and I had every right to hate her. She was so devastated she ruined our relationship and such. It was weird and NOT my sister, so when I got a chance to speak I told her she was going to go see my doctor and I wasn't taking no for an answer. I set up an appointment and my doctor ordered a full blood panel including hormone and vitamins before my sister drove to town for her appointment.
When my sister drove up we spent the morning shopping and she was unpredictable. One minute she was happy and the next yelling about some perceived sight ("That fucking pretentious makeup counter bitch just looked at me funny for my cheap drug store makeup."). It was uncomfortable, So I just walked on eggshells to keep her from exploding.
Anyway, results of the bloodwork and a good doctor: perimenopause. Her hormones are completely abnormal. None of her doctors would even consider it because she was "too young" for menopause, so they didn't even bother running the tests. She'll be coming up with a care plan with my doctor for hormone replacement therapy and diet change to hopefully get back on track.
She still a nutcase right now. For example, she called me crying the other night because she will never have more kids (wha...her husband had a vasectomy years ago). I'm driving to her place next weekend and we're going to batch cook a bunch of meals for her new diet plan (I'll be doing it with her as I could stand to eat healthier). So it'll be a slow process, but we have a diagnosis and plan. I'm just taking her outbursts as "crazy hormones" right now because it'll take awhile to even out.
I got her a dark chocolate cake for Easter that said, "Happy Reverse Easter (when the Easter Bunny takes back your eggs)" because I'm kind of a jerk. She thought it was hilarious though, so we are good.
TL/DR; Sister is going through perimenopause, so she's irrationally, but understandably nutty right now. Oh, and Santa Claus still doesn't exist.
At least they're getting along now.
GiphyThis is the best thing ever. So glad you figured it out. good for you for realizing she was totally out of whack and helping her get back on track. Good luck!
Those hormonal imbalances are rough.
GiphyHoly crap when my mom went through this (before she got onto hormone treatments to balance her out) she legit acted like a crazy person, so I know exactly what you're going through.
My dad gave her an ultimatum to get it checked out because her behavior towards us was getting so irrational and violent, especially me. That's the one and only time I've ever heard divorce mentioned under my roof, because my dad said flat-out to her in the midst of a terrible argument he could not live like that any longer.
Now she's post-menopause after getting hormone treatments and you would have never imagined she behaved that way in the past.
Perimenopause is far more rare than menopause.
GiphyIt's my understanding that it's not too terribly common. There are women on the other side of the spectrum who have asymptomatic menopause, which is also pretty rare. Most women fall somewhere between the two extremes.
The symptoms include hot flashes, night sweats, and moodiness.
GiphyThe physical symptoms were the bad part for my mum. Among other things, she permanently had the feeling that she'd severely burnt her tongue. Apparently that's a thing.
Perimenopause occurs in younger women before the typical onset of menopause.
GiphyMy mother went through menopause almost immediately after having my sister. She was 41 and our family GP refused to acknowledge it could possibly be menopause because of her age, despite her very clearly having all the symptoms. I was 13 when all this started and it was an awful time for our family. At one point I was sure my parents would divorce. I honestly don't know how my dad didn't just walk away. I would've.
Six years later the doctor told her, "whoops, sorry, seems you've actually already been through menopause". It nearly tore our family apart, my mother has never been the same and now it's "over" (totally wasn't) you'll admit it happened? Uh, thanks? Huge victory for her.
The fact that a debate about Santa Claus led to the discovery is pretty remarkable.
GiphyI suppose the sub can add 'hormone imbalance' right next to the 'gas leaks' and 'tumor' unexpected twist responses now. :)
But seriously, it's great that you found out what was really going on and got your sister some help. Going through any health issue is terrifying, let alone one that effects you mental health. It's good you're supporting her and willing to try and get it resolved.
OP did a heck of a thing.
GiphyYou, ma'am, are an AMAZING sister. Well done. She will be so grateful when her hormones are back under control (as will her husband and kids). I hope I have someone who looks out for me as well as you looked out for her.
I hope your sister starts feeling better soon, and take yourself out for a VERY well earned spa day. You deserve it.
And it was Reddit which came through with the best advice - seek help.
GiphyA lot of doctors just write off emotional disturbances in women as depression or, if they're less professional about it, "just being an emotional woman." Good on you for pushing to get a second opinion and find the root of the problem. I have PMDD, and many people, including doctors, don't realize how much hormone disturbances can mess you up.
And the cake sounds awesome, it sounds like she's got a pretty decent attitude about it now that there's a diagnosis.
OP's nieces were not bothered by Santa Claus not existing, by the way.
GiphyI'm just relieved to know a 13 year old didn't still believe in Santa Claus.-g-
Fin.
GiphyPretty much anyone who gets butthurt over a Facebook post needs this type of deep medical analysis.
What happens when a 13-year-old is encouraged to believe in Santa?.
GiphyOne of my best friends, who's a similar age to your sister and is a single mom, has a 13 yo daughter than I discovered DOES still believe in Santa Claus. I was like "are you kidding???" And my friend says no and that she wants her to still believe. Personally, I know the daughter has been made fun of in school for it, as if she isn't awkward enough. I dropped it for this last Christmas but I don't think I'll be able to let it go another year...
Are the presents still hidden before Christmas?
GiphyLots of people hide presents even without Santa. My mom still does...I don't know why. We're not going to scour the house for them.
Yup. It's just plain weird.
GiphyShe hides the presents in my apartment not so her daughter can't shake them to figure out what's in them (that's why my mom hid the presents for so long until I moved out of the house) but so that her daughter thinks "Santa" actually delivers them Christmas morning.
Some parents troll their kids.
GiphyI plan to torture my future children just like my dad tortures me, so yes, Santa exists.
Redditor Specialist-Crazy1466 wanted to hear which movies we still see in our nightmares, so they asked:
"What is the scariest movie you ever watched?"
Some scary movies give me heart palpitations.
So I try to be picky about the stories I watch.
The Balance
the descent horror GIF by Coolidge Corner TheatreGiphy"The Descent. Horrible monsters mixed with darkness and claustrophobia makes a scary movie."
itsminimal
"I was looking for this movie. Imo this film is the perfect balance between bloody, physical horror and actual psychological terror."
AkiraN19
Too Much
"White Noise. Wasn't scary when I watched it in the theater but became VERY scary when my car stereo only picked up static the whole ride home."
stfupcakes
"Oh damn, that was so good. I worked at a video store in ~1996 or so, and a coworker put it on. I was mesmerized. I later took it home and watched it in the dark, as you should, and damn. That's a masterpiece."
Far_Blueberry_2375
"Took my high school girlfriend to it, and she was in tears she was so scared. Almost 20 years later, and she still freaks out if I bring it up."
Prp076
Chilling
"The Day After... I watched it when I was a kid and it absolutely terrified me. When it originally aired, ABC had to set up a phone hotline with counselors standing by. It's one of the scariest depictions of nuclear war in film in my opinion. Chilling."
scarletmanuka
"I've been thinking about these movies, and how unrealistic they are. We all just survived a pandemic. What happened? Things were bad, tent hospital, turned away, truck morgues. And people just... learned to bake bread. Made music."
"Gave up offices and started doing things for their neighbors. Nuclear war would be obviously, a horrific shitshow and not to be entertained, but I really believe, we'd come together and make a good world after. It wouldn't be the complete collapse of our humanity, and the rest can be rebuilt."
Cheap_Doctor_1994
The Splatter
"The Grudge. I don't know why, but this f**king thing is so scary. I had to pause it. Never had this before. Even the worst splatter is nothing for me, but this... No."
Yggdrafenrir20
"It was when the lady got sucked into the bed when she was hiding under the covers. Like they took away my only defense in the dark as a kid."
Colossus245
"I had the same reaction. Something about it just made my skin crawl in a way that other similar movies like The Ring didn't. For several years afterward whenever I had a nightmare, the grudge lady was somehow involved. Yugh."
JonEleven
Turn it Off
Happy Got You GIF by BounceGiphy"There are definitely better movies, but Sinister has always scared the crap out of me. It took me 2 tries to watch it. It’s the only movie I’ve ever turned off from being so scared."
Cobonmycorn
Never saw Sinister.
And now I know to skip it.
My nightmares are bad enough.
flaming sci-fi GIF by FilmStruckGiphy"The Thing. My first viewing was at night, and I was maybe 5 or 6. It scared me so bad I only watched subsequent viewings during the day until I matured a little more."
Same-Reaction7944
Never Again
“'The Ring' when I was 9 or 10, that was scary."
DelusionalGorilla
"I saw it in my 30s, on pain meds for kidney stones, while my wife and kids were away. The thing that freaked me out the most was that in the middle-end of the film someone called me from an unknown number and hung up."
EnIdiot
"It's the only movie I absolutely refuse to watch ever again. I saw it ONCE as a kid and I'm 30 now. I still have occasional nightmares about it. Sometimes I'll be eating and this movie will pop into my head for NO REASON and I lose my appetite completely. I'm haunted by it."
guiltyonallcharges
Too Much too Handle
"Event Horizon... or maybe Pandorum."
Nulltan
"Worth noting Event Horizon is one of the most famous cases in the lost media community. It had 30 minute cut for being too grim for the test audiences. 30. Minutes. While some scenes did make their way to the 2006 DVD, most of it is considered most likely lost for good barring some miraculous surprise discovery."
"You can read about what was cut at the Lost Media Wiki here: https://lostmediawiki.com/Event_Horizon_(partially_lost_unreleased_130-minute_cut_of_sci-fi_horror_film;_1997)"
Lights On
"The Exorcism of Emily Rose. I kept waking up at 3 am on the money for weeks afterward. Didn’t help that I found and listened to the original tape-recorded material of her speaking fluidly in different languages while being exorcised."
Opening-Ad-3775
"This is it for me. I watched it in theaters when my boyfriend was out of town. I went home and slept with the lights on. I love scary movies and had never done that before or since. I’m going to have to look for those tapes!"
LostintheLand
Wobbled
kathy bates misery GIFGiphy"Misery. My knees were wobbling when I walked out of the theatre. No more Stephen King for me."
suzymwg
"I watched that while dealing with a stalker. Horrible choice."
sethro919
I love scary movies, but some of these sound like a step too far.
Misery still haunts me.
Redditor Tight_Anywhere6794 wanted to hear about the things parents have said in the past that haunts everyone still, so they asked:
"What insult have your parents said, that is stuck in your head as an adult?"
I've been blessed with the mother I had.
So I can't speak from experience.
But I've heard parenting horror stories.
Bad Expressions
Sad Kid GIF by 1tvGiphy“'You’re so annoying.' Said to me as a young kid while I was expressing enthusiasm over some new interest. Later my father complains I never tell him anything."
foppishyyy
Mean Spirited
"What did I do to deserve a fat kid?"
Silosolo
"My parents also mocked me for being fat, and outright physically abused me as in forcefully grabbed my fat child manboobs or slapped me while calling me fat-related names."
"A lot of people at school did it too, so obviously I have a lot of self-image issues like I never let anyone see me without clothes these days. The worst part is that I legitimately internalized a lot of hate, I could never care for myself enough to actually get fit."
FoeWithBenefits
What's My Name?
"My parents divorced when I was young and they hate each other. My mom would call me my dad's name when she was really upset. What makes it worse is that I confided in her that I never wanted to be like my dad. She used that ammunition against me."
Discarded_Pariah
"That's awful. You are your own person. You aren't your father."
blksmnr
Unfunny
"'You can't even laugh right.'"
"My mom in a weird moment I thought we were bonding. There's something inherently extra evil when someone tells you your joy is wrong. Told her I'm engaged and hoped she could at least be happy I'm happy and she ghosted everyone to the point the family thought died. She's a mess."
BlindEditor
"I'll never understand parents that are so hard on their own children that they can't even be happy for them. So their sole function is to bring misery to their offspring?"
macabre_irony
Evil
Oh My God Wow GIF by The Roku ChannelGiphy"My little brother was drowning, I tried to save him but also almost drowned, we got rescued by a neighbor. My mom told me that they should've left me in the pond. I haven't spoken to her in many years."
Ilookbetterthanyou
Good Lord. How do people like this exist?
Tragic.
HIM
"She told me I was acting just like my father when I would get upset. I would just get kinda pissy and sulk. He would go on rampages and scream and hit and throw things. He pushed her down the stairs once. I would never lay a finger on my current partner. The worst part is I look just like him. I was wondering if my mother always expected me to turn into my dad. I prove her wrong every day."
rot_grl
10 Years Old
"When I was ~10 years old, my mum once said 'If I could go back in time and make sure I never gave birth to you, I would in a heartbeat.'"
"Never forgot it. Talked to her about it a couple of times years later and her responses ranged from 'That never happened' to 'Oh yeah and I suppose I’m just the worst mother ever' and finally 'Yeah but I didn’t mean it, you know that.'"
"Messed me up tho tbh. Another one was '[older sibling] was the only child we actually planned for, the rest of you were accidents.' I don’t think it was intended as an insult, but being told your entire existence was an accident as a child kinda stung."
SpiderP*bes
Failures
“'You’re the biggest mistake I ever made.' - my mother when I was 5. I’m 32 now and it’s been the undercurrent for our relationship ever since, constantly wondering if anything I’ve achieved or struggled for is something she’s genuinely proud of or just relieved to say I wasn’t a total failure on her part."
thefaehost
Generational Issues
"Not a parent but a grandparent, I was adopted when I was 12 years old (my parents were both drug addicts so I was in and out of foster care most of my life) my adopted mother's father turned to me on Christmas Eve when no one else was around and said 'My daughter should have never adopted you, she should have let you stay on the streets where you belong'… he got nicer as he got older and sicker but I couldn’t find it in myself to forget what he said even almost 10 years later. Went to the funeral for moral support but was indifferent about his passing."
samweather227
Just Me
Sad Kids GIF by Cian DucrotGiphy"I was an only child and lonely. When I asked for a sibling, the response was 'If you want to know why we don't have more kids, go look in the mirror.'"
Responsible_Fly_3565
Some people should never have children.
Awful.
