Hello 911? My kid is being ridiculously cute. Or disruptive..we're not sure which....
u/Ialonesurvive asked:
911 operators, what's the funniest thing you had a kid call in?
Here were some of the answers.
Holiday Surprise
My uncle is a dispatcher in my home town. He always tells me this story of this 4 year old who called 911 because his older brother farted on him.
The kid hung up the phone a short time after he explained what happened. My uncle said he was laughing too hard and had to wait a couple extra seconds before calling the number back.
The mother answered the phone and he had to explain what happened to her and to make sure everything was alright. The mother was mortified and apologized over and over, my uncle said it was a welcome moment of levity during a stressful holiday workweek.
Big Hearts
I had a little one call in to our center about 10 times, just so she could tells us that she loved us and appreciated us, and we are doing such a great job. Our center is pretty big, so she would get a different person almost every time. However, if she got you more than once, she would say something like, "Nonono, I already told you! I need to tell someone else. You're great, but they need to know they're great, too! Okay, I love you, bye!" It was all from a disconnected cell, and we weren't really getting a great phase on her location, but she stopped after about an hour, so it wasn't super concerning. Made my day! I hope she grows up and keeps that big heart of hers, we need more people like her in the world. (They don't necessarily need to call 911, but the point still stands lol.)
The Rules
I had a little boy call 911 to tell me he was hungry and needed breakfast. I asked him if he was alone and he said no his sister was watching him but she was sleeping. I told him he should go wake his sister to have her make him breakfast, he said she is real mean and she won't be nice to me! I said ok, you stay in the house and I will take care of this. His mom was an EMT so I knew his family, I called his grandma and had her go take care of the breakfast crisis and his sister had no idea. His mom later called to apologize and I just asked her to explain the general rules of 911.
Close Enough
Me: 911 where is the emergency?
Little kid: Uh.. yeah.. I.. we need a.. a vegetarian.
Me: (long pause) A what??
Kid: A vegetarian.
Me: (Silence as I am processing this)
Kid: For my dog he's sick.
Me: Ohhhh.. okay you need a veterinarian. Sorry buddy but 911 is for human emergencies..!
Kid: Oh, okay bye.
Kid had to have been like 10 to 12 years old.
Lecture
My dad was the Chief of Police when I was growing up, and I spent a lot of time at the station.
When I was 4 or 5, my mom wouldn't let me do something, so I called the emergency line (pre-911 days) and after the "XXX Police, what is your emergency" greeting, I very sternly requested that they arrest my mother.
The dispatcher recognized the address I was calling from and called my dad to tell him that I was on the emergency line and what I wanted.
I got a lecture that night, but from what my dad says, they had a good laugh about it at the station.
Poor Steve
My cousin called because she was giving her lizard a bath and it went down the drain. (It was like a tiny house gecko named Steve). She called 911 crying that Steve was drowning and had gone down the drain. By the time the dispatcher figured out Steve was a gecko the police and fire dept were already pulling in. She was like 6 or so and I still tease her about it.....I do feel bad for Steve though.
K Bye
My son managed to hit the emergency dialer on my cellphone while i was doing laundry. I heard him happily babbling toddler gibberish before saying, "Kay, bye!" And handing me the phone. He pretends to talk on it so i thought nothing of it until i heard, "Hello? Hello?" On the phone.
I apologized a LOT and removed the option for emergency dialing without actually unlocking the screen. The lovely lady on the other end didn't seem too upset by it.
A Guilty Night
My kid was 17 months old and impossible to tie down. While I was cooking dinner he went into the study and somehow dialed triple zero (emergency line in Australia). I think he was trying to talk to his Nanna, but panicked when a stranger's voice came down the line instead.
I caught him and hung up the phone, not knowing he'd actually dialed anyone. Then I went back to cooking butter chicken for dinner. Fourteen minutes later the police are on my doorstep.
They came in urgently, looking for "an old man who might have fallen down". The emergency line operator had asked several questions, but the only response she had gotten was laboured, heavy breathing that she thought was an old man too injured to speak. Luckily for us, it was just sneaky and confused toddler wheezing.
We figured it out and I brought my kid out to meet the policemen. One of them said "Yeah, that'd be the perp. Look at the guilty look on his face." Funnily enough, my kid did have an expression of extreme chagrin. Possibly the first and last time he ever felt guilty for anything.
Fear
I LOVE telling this story at work, so if any of my co-workers see this they will instantly know who it is, but oh well.
A couple of years back I got a call from a kid who was about 6 or 7, stating that his brother (who was about the same age) had hit him. This is more of a parental than a police matter, so I politely asked him if I could speak to a parent. "NO!" was his reply. I lowered my voice an octave and said "Let me talk to your mom or dad". Same reply from the kid. I went into semi-angry, but totally serious "ADULT" mode and firmly said "Put one of your parents on the phone or I'm sending the police to 1234 Main Street" (he was calling from a landline so I had his address). He paused for a moment, and then I could hear him start vomiting in the background of the phone call out of fear.
Did wind up sending the police out to chat with the young man as I was never able to speak to a parent to verify that everything was OK - he received a lecture.
Firm Affirmation
Not an operator, but my uncle who is an alcoholic would show up at our house growing up. Usually not a big deal, but usually had to call the police to take him back to the half way house.
One time this happened while my Mom was out, so my brother called 911. When they answered "Hello 911, what's your emergency?" My brother, who was maybe 10, answered "Hello, this is NOT an emergency."
