Redditors who have been bullied were asked: "Have you ever run into said bully several years later? What was the encounter like?" These are some of the best answers.
1/23 I specifically go out of my way to visit the full service gas station he works at now.
2/23 I was flat-chested all of middle school and early high school.. One guy was relentless when he picked on me. Years later he ended up trying to sleep with me at a party I hosted... I guess having large breasts made the difference for him.
3/23 I was bullied by this massive guy when i was 15. He easily had a foot and 2-3 stone on me. Went on for about a year and then kind of fizzled out. Nothing too harsh, just the occasional bloody nose.
5 years later I wander into a new hairdresser in town to get a standard trim and here's the guy cutting hair. He was incredibly apologetic and explained how he'd been so confused and angry because he couldn't admit to himself that a massive, tough guy like him could be gay and want to be a hairdresser.
He had the final laugh though as he offered me free highlights to make up for things and I looked like a tool for the next 7 weeks.
4/23 I met them while I was working at subway. They were rich and still douches.
5/23 Third through sixth grade this punk made my life hell. That bastard Lenny had a gang even. Fast foward to just after college, making real money for they first time. I go to a shop to buy a high end sound upgrade for my new car and whodya know is there. Shitty shirt and tie and all.
Salesman shuffles up to me and I say "Hiya, Lenny. I'm here to buy, but not from you". I walked over to another salesman and requested his assistance instead.
I spent over twice as much as I intended to, sort of my version of both middle fingers in the air. The look of hatred on his face as I pulled out the credit card made 8 year old me very content. Worth it!
6/23 One bully is now a close friend whilst another is a drug dealer who probably will be on Jeremy Kyle in a year. Life works in odd ways.
7/23 I had a bully in elementary/middle school. He continued to be in my classes until senior year of high school. During this time, he reigned back on the bullying and just turned into your run of the mill ass hole. Last day of senior year, he asked me to sign his year book, which I thought was odd given our past. I wrote this long diatribe in his year book, paraphrased something like:
"Dear _____, Remember when you were my friend and then you turned into my bully in middle school? You'll be happy to know that your not a bully so much as a dick now. I can't really stand to be around you, Have a good life"
The kicker is that he went to my college. We ran into each other on campus once or twice and it was always super awkward, because he was really civil, and I can only think about the yearbook and wonder why he's being really civil to me.
8/23 A girl and her clique bullied me quite badly when I was younger, and at the time I resented it a great deal.
10 years later she added me on Facebook out of the blue, and we actually had a really nice conversation about our lives and what we were up to these days. She somehow turned into a pretty decent person, and the unpleasant past was not mentioned once by either of us.
I have never really been good at holding grudges, and I do believe that people often grow into someone very different than who they once were. Not to make light of bullying but a lot of the time children have no idea of the damage that they do, and are the victims of awful parenting (such as poor discipline) themselves. Sorry, I know you guys would prefer something more juicy than this, and I'm sure some people stay assholes for their entire lives.
9/23 I saw a bully from middle school in my local Shoprite. He had a lot of problems. His mom had a heart attack, and he had a car accident and suffered serious back injuries.
When I first recognized him, I exclaimed, "I remember you! You were such an asshole to me in middle school!" We laughed, and he told me the above. He apologized for acting like he did. He said something about this stuff happening to him because of how he treated me, but I was nice and I denied it.
10/23 I'd lost all the weight they bullied me for, her boyfriend tried to come onto me when we were both in a pub.
Long story short: Her chin, my fist, satisfaction.
11/23 Was bullied for about 10 years, 5 years of those by a guy we'll call Kenny for now. I had switched school, and was doing much better, and actually had some good friends. About 4 years after I had last seen him, there was a volleyball-tournament between different schools, and his apparently was one of the competing teams, as was mine. And so it turned out, we matched against each other. The moment he saw me, he shouted:"Oh that's __, we're definitely going to win now!"
What he apparently didn't know, was that in those 4 years he hadn't seen me, I had changed from a small and skinny guy, into a 6'2, 165 lbs guy with a 124 mph tennis serve. The first time I saw his face again, all the memories came back to me, and for a bit, I was scared again, until one of my friends told me, after I had explained who Kenny was, that I was now taller and stronger than him, and that it was time for some revenge.
Every time I had the opportunity to smash a ball when standing at the net, I would aim for him. The 124 mph tennis serve meant that i had an incredibly strong smash as well, which terrified him. My team ended up winning the match, after which I shouted:"Hey Kenny, I thought you were so sure you were going to win?" That once sentence, that one time of getting back at him was enough to make him snap. He went berserk, and stormed for me in a fit of rage.
Bring on that 124 mph serve again, and that moment right there, was the first person I ever punched someone... And also the first time i saw someone go K.O. All it took was 1 hit, and it was all over. All the fear, the years of tormenting, they were all over.
Now I would like to say, I don't like fighting, and haven't punched anyone since said punch, but when people say "Violence is not a solution", bullshit, yes it is. It's the only way to let go of all those memories. After years of being used as a punching bag, simply saying "yeah we're okay" does not do the job. It simply doesn't.
12/23 I had since grown up and become a successful IT pro. He was working the counter at a Pizza place me and my GF at the time had ordered from.
I acted like I didn't recognize him. He recognized me though...
13/23 Mines kinda sad. I was bullied by this kid in high school pretty often. I was small, he was big, and in his mind that was all it took to mean I was worth tormenting. I constantly just went with the non reaction technique, I avoided most of the problems this way compared to others he bullied simply because no reaction from me meant no fun for him. But I watched him do the same to my friends who reacted more strongly, and because I was with them I was just kinda on his radar until eventually I transferred schools.
Flash forward to two years ago: It's ten years later. I'm successful, independent, healthy and happy. I'm working in my home towns ER now. We get a patient found down out in the bushes, and I'm asked to see him. It's this dude. He's looking kinda rough, puked on himself, covered in leaves, but still huge. I don't miss a beat. Vitals, line, labs, fluids, everything you would do given the situation. Hours later he's sobering up, were talking about his situation and he stops and just stares at me mid sentence. "Oh, I remember you now."
Cue me thinking "great, thought we weren't gonna bring this up." But then he went on, "Man I am so sorry for how I treated you in high school. I was a horrible person, there is no excuse. But I really want you to know I regret who I was and I'm not that person anymore." Well my jaw basically hit the floor. It gave me a lot of hope for people to change. I'm glad he had a chance to, but his alcohol addiction was probably now covering the same pains that caused him to be such a broken person a decade before.
Three months later he came in again as my patient, this time because he choked on his own vomit. He never woke up.
14/23 Guy who bullied me for being "gay" (not liking sports) turned out gay himself and hit on me several years later. He's a bigger queen now than I ever was.
15/23 He died of an overdose three months after our class finished secondary school. Not that he finished on time with us, of course; he'd already been held back a year, then eventually he dropped out altogether.
I was actually quite sad when he died. He was a dick, a drug-dealer (and user, obviously), and he stole from me, but he was also a very troubled and tragic person, and as it turns out, he did some very good things as well: he talked friends out of panic attacks and saved one girl from jumping out a 10-story window when she was drunk. All of this I found out after his death.
16/23 I was bullied by this mean girl all through elementary and middle school. Senior year of high school we had a mutual friend and were sitting at the same lunch table. I had just broken up with my boyfriend of 2.5 years and she asked me about it. She then told me that I was too good for him and he didn't deserve me. It felt really good. No animosity towards her ever again.
17/23 He served me chicken at Nandos. He also had man boobs.
18/23 In middle school I was absolutely tormented by this girl - she spread nasty rumors, manipulated other girls against me, did the whole "cold shoulder-refuse to acknowledge-and ostracize" deal. Eventually led to a host of social anxiety and insecurities that took a long time to recover from.
Years later, I ran into her at a coffee shop. I was the one to approach her - not aggressively but it felt amazing to be the one in "power". I spoke positively and congratulated her on getting into a great school. It felt great to be the better person and it was obvious that she was hella uncomfortable and nervous to be around me.
Plus, she had developed a wicked unibrow.
19/23 I used to get made fun of in grade school for my clothes and shoes because my parents couldn't afford to buy me anything new. There was one guy, Miguel, who was the worst about it. Around this time last year I went to a McDonald's and saw him behind the register. I had just gotten freelance work, which could potentially lead to getting hired, at a company I really liked. He didn't recognize me, but I definitely knew it was him, especially because of his name tag. I didn't confront him or anything, because it was years ago and we were kids, but I thought it was interesting how different our lives were.
20/23 I wasn't popular in high school, but in college I sort of blossomed and am actually attractive (not to sound conceited). It took some getting used to. I was still in the "ugly girl" mindset.
Visiting my hometown, I saw the popular girl from high school that used to tease me about boys not liking me. She was in line at the store and looked terrible. Overweight, tired. She looked like an adult, like a mom. But not a happy one. I couldn't believe we were the same age! I guess I'm an adult technically but I don't really feel like it.
I checked out her Facebook. Turns out she's divorced with two kids from different guys. And she works at a paycheque loan place.
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