Parents of Reddit were asked: "What is the creepiest thing your young child has ever said to you?" These are some of the best answers.
1/22 I was tucking in my two year old. He said "Goodbye dad." I said, "No, we say good night." He said "I know. But this time its goodbye." Had to check on him a few times to make sure he was still there.
2/22 My 3 year old daughter stood next to her newborn brother and looked at him for awhile then turned and looked at me and said, "Daddy its a monster... we should bury it."
3/22 "Go back to sleep, there isn't anything under your bed." "He's behind you now." Still haven't gotten over that one and shiver at the memory.
4/22 I was sound asleep, and at around 6am I was woken up by my 4 year old daughters face inches from mine. She looked right into my eyes and whispered, "I want to peel all your skin off".
The backstory here is I had been sunburned the previous week, and was starting to peel. In my sleep addled state however, it was pretty terrifying for a few seconds. I didn't know if I was dreaming, or what was going on.
5/22 Around four or five months ago, at like 3:00am I was awoken by a very weird growling sound. Disoriented and in the dark I started to come to and for the life of me couldn't figure out what the sound was. I had fallen asleep on the couch in the living room which added to my confusion. I was thinking maybe the cat had caught something, but really had no idea.
As my vision started to come around, this three foot grotesque looking shadow thing starts to appear a few feet in front of me. Just standing there growling. Creepy. Even though in reality it only took me a few seconds to figure out what was going out, I imagine my appearance would have been that of someone who was visibly shaken.
It was my son. My three year old son had snuck out of bed at three in the morning, found his hulk mask in the dark, and decided to go find daddy to play superheroes. I guess his idea of playing was to do a hulk growl two feet from my sleeping face until I woke up in a panic. He ended up doing the same thing to my wife a few weeks later which, to me, was way more hilarious.
6/22 My daughter told me she wanted to live with me and my wife forever. She's 17.
7/22 My toddler went through a phase where she would just constantly say 'hi' to things. "Hi hi hi hi hi hi"
One day, it came out sounding more like "Die die die die die" So I say to her "What's that you're saying?" And she turns to face me and just whispers "Diiiieeeeeee......."
8/22 My kid's catholic school is over 100 years old. There is a basement under the gym that's used for storage. I was subbing once and during recess one of the kick balls goes down the stairs. A little girl was standing at the top of the stairs yelling "Just throw it up to me". I went over and asked who she was talking to and she replied "That big man down the stairs" I went down and there was nobody down there and it was the only way in.
I asked some of the other kids if they have seen the man before and they said "Yes, but sister told us not to talk to him". I asked them to describe "sister" and they described a nun and there haven't been nuns at the school in 40 years.
9/22 Why are you crying? "Bad man" What bad man? "There." Points behind me at a dark corner of the room.
Lamp on bookshelf next to said darkened corner falls off as soon as I turn to look. She slept in our bed that night.
10/22 "So I shouldn't throw him in the fire?" 3 year old daughter holding her baby brother for the first time.
11/22 OK, backstory time. When I was a kid "Mr. Rand" used to come into my room 4 or 5 times a week. He'd talk to me and tell me about 'stuff' and how he was killed in WW2. See Ol' mate Rand was a figment of my 4 year old imagination. Any way one day when I was 9 or so Mr. Rand stopped showing up.
Fast forward to about 3 years ago and my son, who is about 5 at the time, walks out of his room one night at about 11:30and says there's a man in his room. I flip out And run in his room to find nobody to which he then says "Mr. Rand said you can't see him anymore, but he's ok!". The kids got his own imaginary mate called Mr. Rand, but they only chat once or twice a year.
12/22 Yesterday my 3yo son told me "today's [sister's] birthday!" I went into labor last night.
13/22 My niece was sitting on the couch with a weird look on her face. Her mom asked her what she was thinking about, and she said, "I'm imagining the waves of blood rushing over me."
Turned out they had been at a local science museum with an exhibit on the circulatory system. One of the features was a walk among some giant fake blood vessels, and she was remembering that.
14/22 My son (about 6) asked my mother to lay down on her stomach, then he sat on her butt and started bouncing up and down and proclaimed, "Now we're mating like reptiles!" Thanks Discovery Channel!
15/22 Not to me, but to his grandmother. He was cuddling with her and being very sweet (he was about 3 at the time). He takes her face in his hands, and brings his face close to hers, then tells her that she's very old, and will die soon. Then he makes a point of looking at the clock.
16/22 When my 2.5 year old and her friend were hanging out, the topic of T-Rex and other dinos came up. I asked her friend: "If you were a T-Rex, what would you do for fun? " He answered: I'd chase herbivores!
I then asked my daughter this question: "If you were a T-Rex, what would you eat? " She got very serious and looked me right in the eyes and said: "Children. I'd eat children"
17/22 "My brain is telling me to do things I don't want to do." He's 4.
18/22 My daughter likes to come into our bedroom and wake me up by whispering into my ear, "There is no Aida, only Zuul" in this really creepy voice.
19/22 I jokingly asked: "What's the best way to get a girlfriend?"
7-year-old's response: "Tell her to be my girlfriend or she'll never see her parents again."
20/22 Possibly the creepiest thing my son did was one day I scolded him for misbehaving so he hid his head under his blanket. I pretended I couldn't find him by saying "Where is my little Carson?" He slowly lowered the blanket and with a dead evil stare said, "Carson is gone, I am Rick." I'm certain he's possessed. We never knew any Ricks, as far I can remember. Still don't. Never figured out where he picked up the name.
21/22 My five year old son asked me last week "What do you see through the black circles in my eyes when you're controlling me when I'm at school?"
22/22 We were having roast chicken for dinner. Son (3) has lightbulb moment. Holds up chicken skin. "When we say 'chicken skin', is this really the skin of the chicken? Like my skin?" Next day after some Sunday nappage we play cars. I see a fresh scar on his foot. Straight line with a little dry blood. Ask the little sir about it: "I cut myself. I took a knife because I wanted to see what my meat looks like under my skin but it hurt a little so I stopped. I still don't know." Good thing he didn't want to see his sister's flesh!
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